fucking fathers day hit me harder than it should have.
>Have coworker who is 18 (work at restaurant)
>busboy
>ask him about fathers day and what he is doing for his dad
>"my dad passed away when I was 12 to cancer"
>say Im sorry and had no Idea, all that stuff
>he said its cool and that it happens all the time, forgets about it
>later on our break he tells me to come over to see something on his phone
>Says he thinks Ill like it
>home videos of him riding his first bike and his dad recording saying "thats my boy!" and giving him a huge hug
>next video is of him catching his first baseball at 4 and that dad goes "woah what a catch, nice one buddy! we have a future Derek jeter on our hands!" proceeds to hug him.
>told him it was beautiful, but why did you show me?
>"I dont know, you remind me of him, same hair and eyes, your bring me positive vibes at work that sometimes get me through the day"
>go to my car for the rest of break and cry my eyes out, just thinking about the way his father acted reminded me of mine.
Well, anyone have a feels related to fathers?
>>29404772
Mine died when I was 15. He caught some virus and died slowly over 2 weeks in a hospital. I watched him take 1 step forward 2 steps back everyday. I feel like it he would've survived if hadn't smoked. I know he loved me but I also feel as though he could've taken better care of himself, I went through my formative years without a father figure, I felt angry at him as though I was abandoned. I think the reason he smoked is because my Mother was a bitch who revealed her true colors after they got married and he suffered from a bullet wound he got in the Navy, which put him in constant pain.
I just hope there's some sort of afterlife and that he wasn't scared when he died.
My mom and dad got in a fight today and he's avoided everybody in the house all day. So I havent even seen my dad all day. No one touched the cake we made either.
Bought him and I 3rd row seats to a Weird Al Yankovic show on Tuesday though. Hope we still go I spent $144 on that shit.
>>29405051
thats awful anon, god be with you and your family. your dad sounded like a tough guy, i doubt he was scared
>>29405137
talk to him man, he will love the suprise
>>29405215
Thanks Anon, It means a lot. I think what hurt the most is that the rest of my family just kind of moved on.
My father suddenly fucked off when I was 10 and didn't give a life sign for over a decade.
A year ago I find him on the internet and ask him why he left me, my mother and my brother just like that without a word.
He acts like everything is cool and even dares to ask if we want to meet up half across the country so that he can introduce us to his new wife and children. This asshole is dead to me.
>>29405051
Iktf, my dad died too but when I was really youngat least you got to know him
>>29405313
>new wife and children
I know hes dead to you, but you should honestly meet him again and see why he left and see what his knew life is like. Also you can beat the shit out of him
>>29405280
I know that feel all too well. When My grandpa passed away I was devastated for probably a year while my family just moved on, I was really pissed off by it
>>29405385
Not that anon, but aside from that last part why would he want to do any of that
>>29405319
Thats not a luxury, thats a curse. To get attached to someone and then for them to just get taken away from you.
>>29405417
You said he wanted to meet up with you right?
>tfw grew up with no father.
>>29405441
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all
went home for fathers day, wanted to be nice to them. dad snapped at mom over retarded irrelevant shit and autistic brother started going on about stupid creepy bullshit and locked himself in the basement after mom told him he was being inappropriate.
I hate this. I hate that I grew up in this miserable cesspit family instead of having the chance to be someone decent and grow up with people capable of love. I hate that I never had the chance for an actual childhood or to be well-adjusted.
I've literally failed at every thing my father encouraged me to do.
>failed at sports
>failed at relationships
>failed at college
>no productive hobbies
>can't draw, don't read (besides manga, watch degenerate Japanese cartoons
>jerk it to drawings
>no future prospects
Even through all that he still treats me like a human. Still encourages me. Tries to help me find jobs. He's a good guy, and I've failed to deliver as a son.
>>29405466
Same
I don't really care honestly
>>29405385
He already told me the "reason".
Apparently he wasn't happy with his life back then so he moved to the other side of the country, found a new girlfriend and impregnated her.
Everything was going well between him, us and my mother but then he had some unexplainable burnout that caused him to reset his entire life. He just pretended that we never existed left us just like that.
>>29405490
Never been loved is much worst. It make you feel undesirable as a human being. This quote seem way too forced.
>>29405051
there is an afterlife
>>29405508
thats my biggest fear, that I let my father down
>>29405567
What makes you believe there is one? I want to believe.
>>29405606
different poster But Im OP, The universe is too perfect and everything in the Universe is so perfectly coordinated and made that a god must exist
>>29405606
if we are alive already it implies that it will always be that way
you either have consciousness in the universe, or you dont. so if there was no life after death, there wouldn't be life to begin with.
death is just a change of consciousness, a loss of control over what you will experience.
Im not saying it will be good or bad im just saying it will be apart of the universe which ultimate makes itself conscious
>>29405688
>if we are alive already it implies that it will always be that way
wait so what you're saying is because something is some way, it will always be that way? that is the most twisted logic I've heard in a long time.
>you either have a consciousness in the universe, or you dont. so if there was no life after death, there wouldn't be life to begin with
you can lose things that you have, yknow. Like, you can get something, and then lose that something. You never get that thing back. It's not just a black and white situation. And yeah there is no life after death, just because there is one now doesn't mean there has to always be one.
>death is just a change of consciousness, a loss of control over what you will experience
no, death is a loss of consciousness, there's nothing to experience anymore
>>29405658
>too perfect
>perfectly coordinated
how is it 'perfectly coordinated', or perfect at all?
My dad has PTSD from experience as cannon fodder in Korean conflict (yes, I'm old).
He could not ever get past it. He drank himself into a stupor whenever possible. He would freak out without warning. I got the shit beat out of me a lot. When I was 4 he had broken my arm.
Now I've seen some shit in my time and I understand what happened to him and that in his day and in his upbringing there was no one to turn to for help. But still - that shit fucked me up.
Now he has the alzheimers and can't remember a damn thing.
>>29405490
I'd disagree. Loved and lost is a lot more painful than never having loved.
>>29405950
how old are you anon? my grandfather was actually in the Korean war too, navy seabee.
>>29405840
The mountains of the world, the way the stars are aligned, the resources we have, how we get our energy. Everything seems so perfect that its impossible for a god not to make it
>>29404772
My dad died when I was 14. It fucked me up pretty good and I definitely have daddy issues. My mom divorced him when I was 3 and I was raised by a single mom. She raised me to bad-talking him; he didn't fight for visitation and actually took my mom to court over him not paying child support despite being a doctor and going on vacations. He also went crazy in an argument that he almost killed my mom by stuffing an orange down her throat. He did a lot of coke as well, combined with the weed he became paranoid-schizophrenic for a short period and lost his medical license.
He was a pothead workhorse 6'4" alpha who fucked other girls at least, and I definitely got his horndog genes which was nice. He still treated me well when I did see him and we had lots of fun and good memories when he took me on vacations with my siblings as well. We also had a cool ass cottage (Canadafag here). But yeah, I wish he stayed alive; I have so many questions I want to ask the crazy bastard.
>playing games on the computer
>dad comes in
>talk for a little bit
>completely out of context he says "thanks"
>confused as fuck
>he leaves my room
>ask him what he's talking about
>tells me its fathers day
JUST
>>29405508
>tfw I feel like I'll never live up to my father's achievments
he went from a deli worker making pennies at 17 to an IT systems manager making 6 figures, with 2 kids, a wife and no completed college degree. I can't even excel far in college, I just do the minimum because I struggle alot. Ever since I was little I struggled to understand and finished things.
I feel like I must live up to those expectations or I'm a worthless failure.
>>29405998
I'm 51 <original years old>
>>29405964
To each his own I supposeit eats away at me that I will never ever know him
All my dad can talk about anymore is how proud he is of my half sister. She's 6 and skipped a few grades. He never talked about me that way even when I wasn't an invalid. Feels like he wants to pretend I didn't survive because at least then he wouldn't have to see me break down in tears because my brain locked up and all I can do to express that I need a fork is jab at the air. Ex left a father's day card and a bottle of my favorite liquor outside my apartment, too. Kid's dead but she still does it every year. Maybe she thinks it keeps me from hanging myself for another year. I also shit my bed today. Not a good day.
>>29406021
>mountains of the world
how is erosion in any perfect?
>the way the starts are aligned
that's just fucking pareidolia, it's all made up by people looking for things to find
>the resources we have, how we get our energy
most of those exist just because of the random chance that we exist, which basically caused the resources to even exist. it's not some 'perfectly calculated and created'-god mumbo jumbo, just random chance.
I don't know what my Dad expects of me nor do I really want to talk to him. He's kinda odd, and a really lonely person. I loved him when I was a kid but when him and my mother went through their separation I just lost my connection with him. I've done stuff with him in the past like going fishing but it never feels right, always awkward.
I wish it could be simpler, and I wish he could be more open about everything.
>>29406316
buzzkill desu
>>29406337
sorry, benny. i wish there was an afterlife but it's just a meme made up by normies
>>29406442
you don't know that whatsoever
>>29406517
but you dont know that there is one
>checkmate athiests
>>29406576
guess we should kill ourselves to find out
>>29405051
This gives me more incentive to quit smoking... Thanks friend
>>29404772
Im neet 25 y.o, 5'6 280 lbs. pothead basement dweller, my dad called from work today, he told me to do my chores and at the end I said "Happy fathers day" he responds with a quick "**sigh** uh oic thx"
>>29406651
I cringed so hard when I said it after too, "oooo sure, reallllllll happy fathers day" /sarcasm
I felt like I made it seem like I was rubbing it in that Im such a failure & *surprise* Im picking my nose and farting and jacking off all day to traps in his house while he works all day
>>29406598
i think i'll stay for a while, but yous should probably go ahead and kill yourself, just to test if there is oneplease dont anon I love you
>>29405051
My dad died when I was 13. He kept over working himself. He was a medicine deliverer. He always would accept calls at 3am or whenever. He was always working which was bad for his blood pressure. He ate a ton of fast food too which made it much worse. He drove across all of CO state and even out of state every once in a while. He also had to use his own car which added more stress.
About 2 weeks before his death, he told me that he was dieing. I kind of rubbed it off as one of those "i'm getting old uuuh" jokes.
He had a heart attack in his car on the way home from work. He was only 44
>>29405137
i'm sorry that had to happen anon. hope he likes the tickets
>>29406264
Hey man just hang in there. I can't relate, but it seems your father is the least of your problems. Maybe try just small steps towards family and then later friends
>>29405658
>>29406021
You're one of THOSE people
