This is it robots. I can sense that my girlfriend is going to dump me soon enough
>she stops talking to me today, say she needs some "space"
>been trying to distract myself with studying and playing games all day but all I want to do is message her
>slowly grasping the reality of us not being together, of not seeing her everyday and calling her mine, of her being with someone better than me
Help me robots, I can't do this alone. Am I being cucked for not doing anything about it or should I just keep my integrity and let this break up ride our calmly
>>29117709
prepare yourself for the worst OP desu
oh, and welcome back to r9k
>>29117709
I'm in a relationship that's lasted about a year right now, but I've honestly never had a girl say this to me. If my current gf were to say it in the near future (not counting the fact that she's away on a pre med trip right now), I'd be very concerned, but that's only because she's almost always very clingy.
It really depends on the girl and the context. It could be something bad, or she might actually just need some space for a little bit. Actually, if she specifically said it like that, it really doesn't sound like nothing, but you never know.
>>29117709
break up with her first lol
>>29117777
Check my quads. Also, I'd just give her that space for now. Don't do anything about it. Maybe after a day or two you could ask if she's okay and gauge what she says, but for now just leave it alone and try to relax.
What I do when I'm in a really stressful situation like that is buy some melatonin to help me fall asleep (because when I'm like this, I literally can't sleep). Getting good sleeps in will help tremendously. I like to watch Twitch streams too when I'm really stressed out. Those keep me preoccupied better than playing video games or watching TV when I'm that badly stressed. Talking to a friend for catharsis is also a good idea.
>>29117804
Don't do this. That's just stupid. If this ends in her telling you she wants to break up, then so be it. Trying to beat her to the punch would just be weird and petty.
>>29117777
To be fair I was kind of toying with her a bit and I guess it triggered her to take a step back and really think about the future of us, which I'm all for and completely understand but I know she's going to break up with me once she sees me for who I truly am
>>29117855
What exactly did you do? You're being too vague for me to give you any insight.
>>29117830
Nice quads
It's difficult to not become impulsive and message her out of the blue, I'm just so used to expressing everything I can with her and to be shut off from doing that is taking its toll. But thanks anon, I'll take your advice about the melatonin and twitch streams
Ask her to clarify her intentions, and why she feels the way she does. If you're not sure what she really means, then whatever you act on could end up being fictional and come back to bite you in the ass. If she doesn't care that you're unsure, then she is either knowingly or unknowingly manipulating you and, at this point, should probably be dropped like a hot potato because this kind of behavior only ends up snowballing, and it only proves that she no longer cares.
>>29117804
This is bitchfight-tier shit
did you conquer her or you are one of those fag chads who look good/be rich and vagina owners flock to them
no sympathy for the latter
Fuck her
https://youtu.be/FGBhQbmPwH8
>>29117871
Basically I'm being too much of a robot and not appreciating her as much, isolating myself etc.
Sucks, dude. Do you have an idea of why she wants to break up? Because depending on the reason it could definitely be salvageable.
>>29117901
>not appreciating her as much
Well if you're faced with the reality of losing her and you don't want her, then it sounds like you do appreciate her. Do you think maybe you could communicate that better? I've been in similar situations before and I've been able to work through it.
What sort of things do/don't you do that that make her feel this way?
>>29117901
How is that toying with her?
>>29117902
Well a huge part of it was that I wasn't loyal to her but we've gotten over that. Since then it's just been a build up of tension and stress thinking I'm nowhere near good enough for her, mainly because of that reason
>>29117944
So you cheated on her, stopped, but she's having issues trusting your commitment?
>>29117944
Die in a fire, Chad.
>>29117918
I ask too much of her sexually and time wise, we're both in college and she's doing a full on degree so I hardly ever get to do anything with her
>>29117944
oh fuck off retard
>cheat
>oh noes poor me
>she might leave me
drink bleach
>>29117709
Might not be too late for you. When a gf says she wants space she is testing how you react. If you get too clingy and beg and plead for her attention she will lose way more interest in you and perhaps even become disgusted.
When she asks for space you take that as a sign and go out and play with other people. Socialise and have fun. Do not rub it in her face, she will eventually ask you what you have been doing. I'm not saying to cheat and spend your time flirting, that's just a shitty thing to do. But if she wants to imagine you are doing that, let her.
That's the ideal response to this situation, but it's also okay just to give her the space and let her contact you.
Remember if she wants to cheat she will, you can't do anything about it anyway. When you find out she has you end things and that's that so nothing changes by just giving her space.
I also want to add, sometimes shit happens. We don't know how close you two are but maybe she just lost a family member, maybe she was just offered a job far away and needs to consider private before talking with you, maybe her friend and her had a big falling out.
It's not always going to be about you don't forget that.
>>29117954
Yep. Forgive me sempai
go over to your girlfriend's house and fuck her brains out OP, it's the only way
>>29117979
>>29117944
Oh wow. You're probably fine honestly. I honestly think everything will be fine if you choose for it to be. I'd be impressed if this was guaranteed to end in a breakup.
>>29117944
>I wasn't loyal
funny how you didn't mention this until now. Anyway good job cheating and convincing her to stay with you
>>29117990
I guess I am being really selfish in my thinking, she has a life that I'm not attained to and it's admirable. It's just that she has so much going on in her life and I'm just acting like a whiny boyfriend dragging her down and all I can think of is to let her go before I drag her down completely
>>29118022
Do I deserve a girl who stays with me after I did that to her anon?
>>29118032
I wrote that before I saw you cheated.
Hope she wises up and leaves you desu. How long were you together before you cheated and how long has it been since
>>29117993
I've done that before. Loads of people who have been in long term committed relationships have done that, I believe. We're all human, we make mistakes, etc.
She needs to understand that. You've been together for a year, and it's around that time that people start wondering how long things are going to go on for. It's completely understandable, if not expected, that you're going to have doubts about how viable your relationship is for the long term, (Forgive me if I'm projecting too much here) in which case being disloyal is pretty reasonable.
If you've been with other women and firmly decided against doing it in the future, then she needs to understand that that's not really a bad thing. IMO the fact that happened means you guys are a good match, as opposed to if you kept going or just left her.
She needs to understand that you're young and mistakes are made. Tell her to try her luck with you just that little bit longer, and the trust will come back.
Just don't do it again. Ever. You need to promise yourself that as well as her.
>>29117841
Nah it will send her into a fit of rage over being undesirable and make you look alpha. Trust me dude I know a guy who did it once.
>>29118062
>>29118059
It's been around 6 months since I cheated on her and 3 months since she found out. It's been really tough on her because I'm her first and I immesnly regret doing that to her, but she saw the positives of it rather than the negatives and still wants to be with me even though I'm clearly a fuck up. Its affected me top to the point where I was suicidal because I hurt someone so innocent, but she calmed me down and wants to be with me. If anything I feel as though this experience has made us closer than before
It sucks dude but sometimes things are just un-fixable, unless you have kids or something there is no point of staying together if she says she is no longer in love. Her no longer having the same feelings for you does not have to mean you changed or started being a robot whatever, you probably both grew in different direction.
You will be sad at first but try to think of the relationship as having attributed to your character
Ur gonna make it
>>29118127
let her get even, become a cuck to save your relationship
Holy fuck, last year this thread would have been met with "gtfo normalfag" but not one.
>>29118127
>Boo hoo I cheated look I'm suicidal I clearly regret it
Kys my man
>>29118127
But even despite her forgiving you, she's still having trouble trusting you? That must suck. Is it that plus the effect that your cheating has had on you? As in, is she having trouble loving the person that you've become as a result?
>>29118142
That would actually be justice but she's not the type of person go cheat
>>29118130
She says she loves me but every time she does I feel like I blue pilled her into stating with me, I'm literally worthless and I just can't see why she's still with me when she can easily get a Chad that will provide her with everything that I can't
>>29118189
not cheating, tell her that she is allowed to sleep with another man to even things out.
>>29118163
She trusts me completely now, but I guess she still sees it as a stain on our record, something like that
>>29118219
She's too in love with me to, why do you think she's still with me
If you're willing to let her go at any moment, she's far more likely to stay. Female hypergamy is crazy like that. She thinks you're a loser for wanting to stay with her.
>>29118142
That would make things even worse don't listen to him OP
>>29118242
She's right though, I'm a loser
>>29117709
Ya it sucks just recently went through it. Went on a bender on a bunch of shit and shacked up with a chick. It gets easier.
>>29118222
That's... unusual. I don't really understand what that feels like; I can't empathize with her. My best bet would be that she had a certain image of the sort of person that you were which was shattered when you cheated. You can't get it back to where it was because it was false; she just knows you better than she did before.
If that's the case, then that sucks. I wouldn't really know what to do, other than trying your hardest to be better.
>>29118206
Chads suck though. I don't think many high quality women really want to be in a serious relationship with a Chad, for the same reason you wouldn't fall in love with a brainless bimbo who only cared about her appearance. I wouldn't be *too* worried about that sort of guy.
>boo hoo my girlfriend that i cheated on is going to break up with me
good you fucking faggot.
>>29117709
>>29117709
Just cheat on her. The week before my ex dumped me I fucked a couple of random sluts, got handies from a couple more and then when she finally did it, I was fine Knowing I was plowing the ass of some jailbait-looking nurse the night before she gave me my last blowjob also leaves me much pretty equanimous about whether or not she cheated..
'course, it doesn't stop me missing her. I think I probs posted on this garbagedump of a board maybe 5 times in the 4 years e were together and she was pretty much 8/10 wife material but I do feel a lot better about the breakup.
>>29117709
OP!
I'm legit autistic so this plan probably won't work, but if I were you I'd message her something like
"hey, I noticed you're acting a bit strange lately. Is something wrong? Know that if you need any help with anything, I'm here for you."
Although she said she needed "space". Could be that you're a bit obsessive, in which case that would be a horrible idea. Are you very clingy? How often do you see her/talk to her?
>>29118046
Clearly you don't.
>>29118276
She had always been weary of me given my previous relationships but I guess she was just too distraught at the fact that I actually cheated on her, with me being her first and all. Ive always made it clear to her that I've never loved anyone as much as I've loved her and that I do see a future with us, but how can it become true when I'm constantly feeling shit about myself and have a mild depression for what I did to her. She's helping me get through it but I'm assuming she had enough at one point and she's taking a breather, which is understandable but now I'm concerned she's going to see me for who I truly am or find someone less of a liability
>>29118298
OP DO NOT DO THIS!!! You've already put her through heart break before, cheating in her again will show how much of a pathetic human being you are
>>29118298
OP just don't
>>29117709
I feel like your best bet is to talk to her despite her wanting some space. You mean a lot to her and she wouldn't purposely put you through that unless she knew it was for your own good
>>29118399
Trust me, I've had impulses to just spam her but I'm trying to contain myself. The only thing that's keeping me sane at this point are muh games and mindless television
>>29118298 here
Didn't read that you cheated on her already. You're fucked son. You're saying she got over it, but did she really? No person with any sort of self-respect will be able to 'get over' that in the long-term, you're her first which is why she's tred to keep it going this long but lets be real, the relationship was dead in water as soon as she found out.
"Cheating brought you closer together" What a fucking joke.
>>29118449
I know, I was trying to bluepill myself but I couldn't stand knowing that I ruined our relationship over a drunken one night stand and she and anyone that knows has no respect for me
>>29118484
Just end it with her to end her suffering, not yours
>>29118520
I deserve to suffer more than her, I'm not going to end it because me being with her and waking up everyday knowing that I'm with the one person who forgives my mistake reminds me of the mistake I made and makes me feel even more worthless
>>29118604
Just kys already or prove yourself to her. Be the best boyfriend you could possibly ever be
>>29118484
>>29118484
Best course of action is to break up with her first.
Tell her you don't think the relationship's working, after the ONS you don't think you deserve her anymore and you should break up.
Maybe this attempt at self-sacrificing martyrdom will fix everythhing and she'll want to work things out, more likely you'll just get the chance to salvage some respectability amidst the breakup and avoid getting cucked.
Hey, depending on how much you care about her, you might even get back together in the future once you've both had time to fuck away the bad feelings - that's not for everyone (especially since you were her first) but it was in the back of my mind when I split with my ex (she was always more wife than gf material)
Dump her before she does
The feeling that she wasn't in control and you were will drive her mental
>>29118604
>>29118604
Christ you're fucking drama queen son. If you wnt act like tthat much of a martyr go the whole hog and start fucking flagellating yourself - or don't, because you're a pussy that just wants people to pay attention to you without actually changing anything
>>29118681
It hurts so bad anon, I saw myself marrying her because she definitely is waifu material but I fucked up badly. She keeps saying that I'll get over fucking her up one day but it's been a while already and it doesn't seem to be getting any better. I don't ever want to let her go, even if it's for her own good I couldn't.
Help me get through this robots I need peace once and for all
>>29118742
This.
Jesus fuck he's right, listen to him OP
>>29117944
You deserve no sympathy. I hope she breaks up with you and finds someone better
>>29118755
Go on your knees and beg for her op, do everything you can to convince her you are the love of her life. If you do this she'll fall for the love meme and never let you go. Tried it before like the cuck I am but still worked
>>29117944
If she's still with you, marry her before she realises she's made a mistake
>>29118802
Me too. She doesn't want to break up with me because she loves me too much, what a shame
>>29118717
Don't listen to him OP!!
>>29118874
I would but we're in college, after we finish our degrees we want to go travelling and get married
>>29118910
Break up with her then? Or do you love her too much too?
>>29119007
Exactly. It'll hurt both of us too much but I'm still in pain being with the woman I love and me feeling uncomfortable for having such an angel. I clearly don't deserve her
>>29119116
>yfw you fell for the love meme
>>29117944
>cheated on her
i hope she breaks up with you and tears your heart out. You just created another girl with emotional baggage, who at best will be cold and distant and at worst will turn into a full blown whore.
Tell me shes not white at least.
>>29119850
Don't worry anon she's not white, she's a qt asian whose life I ruined
Kms
