/mischief/ stories for early childhood
>be me
>like 5
>kindergarten play time
>hidden section you couldn't see between chalkboard and little puppet play stage thing for kids
>always wanted to be the one to clap the erasers
>beat those dusty fuckers together harder than my dad beat me
>kid sitting right in front of stage thing
>dust cloud hits him
>he bolts fast as fuck
>get scolded by teacher, told kids have asthma and shit, didn't really care. it was worth it
>get to clap erasers outside from then on
>victory
>be me
>be 4years old, first year of kindergarden age
>hate the nanny
>tell her straight up i wish to see her in plaster from top to bottom
>be 4
>mom tells me to go to bed because its late
>its only 9pm and i dont want to
>put into bed
>chop up moms favourite plant with my plastic sword as vengeance
>get beaten up by dad with my own plastic sword for it
i showed them, right?
>>28973059
i bet your mom remembers that and fucking hates you for it still
not like she ever loved you in the first place
>be myself
>accidentally break the battery cover on the tv remote
>my unstable stepfather gets home and discovers it
>enraged, asks if I did it
>"no, I think it was [older brother]"
>mom's husband goes into the bathroom while my brother is showering and starts spanking him
>still remember hiding in the darkness of my closet as my brother yelled in pain and confusion
mischievous
>>28973091
Classic sibling rivalry. Siblings are the best scapegoats.
>be me
>be like 9
>math class is boring
>would always jerk myself off under my shorts
>didn't know it was weird
>did it with people around me
>no one ever said anything
>the other day i heard my chick friend tell me she saw that
>kill me
>>28973157
>Not asking if she wants to see it again
>19 years old
>forced to be in the army cause of forced conscription
>am a programmer cause I'm good at it
>have a fucking awful female commander who's a cunt and just throws us under the bus all the time to just make herself progress in the ladder
>find out she's allergic to cats
>go home and get a bag's worth of my cat's fur
>wait for her to leave and place some of that fur underneath the keys of her keyboard
>for the next month she had non stop sneezing fits and red eyes
>she eventually wanted to switch offices cause she thought the problem was in the building we were in
>the army wouldn't let her
>she quit as a result
I swear this was without a doubt my greatest achievement as a ruse master. I hope that cunt is homeless and has to share a cardboard box with cats.
>>28973080
you are right ballface
she did love me when i was a baby, she told my dad she wouldnt mind if he didnt come back from conscription
then suprised dad cheated on her
>about 10 years old
>at school
>would always pick my nose but get told not to
>during the winter months I would come to school with a long sleeved shirt
>would pull the sleeve up all the way and then cover up my face with it while I picked my nose
>thought people wouldn't notice or think that there's something out of place with a kid covering his fucking face with a sleeve
Lemme tell ya I was one stupid kid
>>28973249
/manipulative/ and /mischievous/ as fuck
become a politician and become dictator
>>28973315
i'd just put my head down on the desk
>>28973249
>>am a programmer cause I'm good at it
Why was that relevant at all?
>>28973249
Noice. Really noice, anon
>>28974385
>Why was that relevant at all?
I think the nuance is that it's something he didn't necessarily want to become
>kindergarten
>for some reason decide to rip up a crayon box 1 day
>get in trouble and teacher orders me to bring her new box of crayons
>mommy buys new box of crayons from store for me
>when she gives them to me, dump the crayons out into a baggy and keep them
>bring teacher an empty crayon box
She thought she was getting some free crayons, hah, nope!
>sunday school
>we're doing pin the tail on the donkey
>i can see through my blindfold
>pin that shit perfectly
>anon could you see through your blindfold?
>no
>>28974542
FUCKING DESTROYED M8
>>28974616
>be me
>playing some form of pictionary
>can't look as the person reads what they gotta draw
>i would just look upward, cover my eyes and look through the crack at the bottom at the prompt
>b 6 years old
>have a really good family and home
>run away and never find my way back
brought some of my favorite toys so it was all worth it
>>28974385
Well it was to explain why I was in the army as a programmer and not a combat soldier. I guess it's not pertinent to the story but it's the kind of thing that's needed to be known in my country
>go to store that sells combination locks
>set combination on all the locks
>don't buy them
>Norm tells me to have a nice day
>sarcastically say 'sure'
>Implying i will you stupid fucking Norman
>have a nice day anyway just to spite him
Normies on suicide watch lmao
