How do you tell people you are depressed without sounding like a faggot?
I've been depressed for a while however I just thought that's how everyone is, and the people who are getting help are weak and just don't notice that everyone feels the same way they do. However after talking to more and more people I have found that this may not be the case.
I am scared /r9k/ it gets worst everyday and I want to get help but i don't know how to ask for it or who to talk to. I am 19 and live at home, I feel like my parents should be the first ones to tell but I'm not sure how to and I don't want to seem like a whiny bitch who is overreacting.
Any advice?
>>28938616
Remember that you always have us. I don't really know who you should talk to. Try telling your parents though. I'm sure if you tell everything they will listen
You need to stop self-loathing over something you can't help. A bit of self-loathing and self-awareness is a good thing, actually, because it stops people from crying wolf - but the fact that already you're self-conscious about spuriously or casually claiming to be depressed should already cover you there. You're good for self-awareness. Don't beat yourself up in addition.
It really depends on the kind of depression it is. You're very young and you're living in a society that will give you strong and often mutually conflicting advice on the nature of your condition. I don't want to simply present my advice and my opinion about depression (which is pretty niche), as if they're somehow better than others. But I will tell you to do a lot of soul-searching and introspection before you take any leaps. Mostly because people are going to be telling you to take drugs immediately. The standard treatment is just drugs. You go in and they fire pills at your face until one "works," and "works" is usually defined as "he stopped complaining about being depressed" - which doesn't necessarily mean you're any better off. Just make sure you know what you're doing, and don't sign up unreflectively for any one solution.
And also always keep in mind that you're young. Not just the contents of your mind, but the whole terrain of your mind itself is going to change a fuckload over the next 5-10 years. I was horrifically depressed at your age, until I had subtle changes of outlook that I could never have foreseen. Don't be fatalistic. The worst thing about depression is how fatalistic it makes you - how it can make you absolutely certain that there's no way out. Life is ALWAYS more complicated and open-ended than it seems from inside a depressive bubble.
>>28938616
If you have insurance try to go to a therapist. They can help you figure it out and refer you to a psychiatrist if necessary.
You can't really tell anyone without sounding like an attention whore or someone looking for an excuse. But, if your therapist can confirm you can tell your parents that he or she (I'm going to be honest. Try to get someone that matches your gender.) thinks you are depressed. Go from there.
If this sounds like a good plan: figure out what insurance your family has and then use their website to find a list of approved therapists. Try to find somewhere relatively close and look at their website. It will probably take a bit of searching around before you find someone you feel comfortable with.
>>28938771
Some practical advice though: Eat healthy, sleep regular, go outside and interact with people daily, and have lots of socialisation with people.
I know it sounds like cliched obvious normalfag shit, but it REALLY helps over the long term. Or at least, if you want to look at it another way, it prevents your depression from entrenching itself in more basic physiological factors.
And for the love of God, don't medicate with drugs. It will only become a crutch. Take it from me.
>>28938771
>>28938803
I don't even need to read those posts to smell the Reddit-tier self-importance. Shut up.
>>28938616
OP, point is, you can only speak of facts. 'Depression' is an ambiguous term, tainted by its use by normals. Your best bet would be to get a brain scan and literally say, 'my brain has been found to underproduce this or that', because only that would keep people's mouth shut from saying the 'it's all in your head'.
>>28938818
>'Doing normalfaggy things actually helps depression as opposed to proving through your being able to do them that you were not depressed in the first place!'
>>28938771
Did you really just get recommended drugs immediately? If so, that's pretty awful. It should be
1. therapy
2. introduce methods for self improvement/techniques to feel better
3. if that doesn't seem to work, refer to psychiatry
4. psychiatrist works with therapist to determine baseline dose
5. adjusts level of medication if necessary. Adds additional meds if necessary
The majority of folks don't need medication, but it's there are a useful resource if you need it. I needed it and it really helped me. Took it for 2 years and then stopped when I felt comfortable and had a regular schedule.
>>28938932
Fucking up your circadian rhythm and being unhealthy and never getting any sunlight are just gonna make a depressed person worse, and depression unfortunately makes you want to stay up all night jerking off, eat junkfood, and never go outside or exercise.
It's unfair but you need to make sure you don't fall into that hole. Source: My best friend is massively depressed and gained a shitload of weight, and now he has to deal with that + possible diabetes + people treating him like shit, AND his original depression. His problems are just fucking doubled now.
Also, try mindfulness. A lot of my depression came from fucked-up thinking patterns where I'd dwell endlessly on something depressing or obnoxious or embarrassing. The most basic mindfulness technique is useful for identifying shitty thought patterns and redirecting them. It doesn't have to be weird cultist voodoo.
Lel. I went through like 2 years of very serious depression and 3 of mild. My parents didn't even have a clue. I don't really think they would've done much or even been able to do much
>>28938855
>Didn't read the posts
>tainted by normals
please go troll posts that aren't cries for help. try looking for a >tfw no gf instead.
>>28939020
>Also, try mindfulness. A lot of my depression came from fucked-up thinking patterns where I'd dwell endlessly on something depressing or obnoxious or embarrassing. The most basic mindfulness technique is useful for identifying shitty thought patterns and redirecting them. It doesn't have to be weird cultist voodoo.
Okay, so you are literally retarded. Glad that's out of the way.
The so-called mindfulness only 'works' on depression because it makes you indifferent to literally everything that isn't literally before your face, such as a person you're vapidly chatting with, because all other longer-term plans and ambitions are erased by the incessant noise of vapid self-awareness. The fact that it captures depression and anxiety is just an obvious by-product of that. You can't worry about the future if you are crippling your brain to the effect of not being able to worry about anything at all.
>>28939098
But go ahead and throw your studies at me. It's not as if you're ever going to realize that they're not relelevant.
>>28939128
>relelevant
*relevant
>>28938616
OP, from personal experience you always come across as a faggot when you admit you're depressed unless it's with someone who's been depressed.
>>28938986
I did, yep. The first clinic I went to, just to ask for a shrink recommendation, wanted me on SSRIs immediately. Then the shrink wanted me on SSRIs.
My friend has been on everything, and they never worked for him. They also sometimes make it worse, which I've seen. But I don't like just being ANTI-DRUGS GUY because that's irresponsible. Clearly they help a lot of people.
>>28939098
Well, to let OP make his own assessments, I was so depressed that I attempted suicide out of desperation that my 24/7 panic attack and derealization wouldn't end, and I was a complete hikkiNEET for years. And these things helped me, though some only a little bit.
I'm not recommending any of these things as a panacea. You might be oversensitive here because you associate me with people who lazily handwave depression away or give platitudinous advice about it, because they've never actually experienced it. But I'm not doing that.
Different depressions have different causes. Some people are lucky, and an aggregate of lifestyle adjustments is all they need. Most people probably have fucked brain chemistry or deep psychological problems, BUT that doesn't mean alleviating auxiliary factors can't help. On some level I am definitely just a chronically depressive mental case, but it sure didn't help the situation any when I was also a self-loathing shut-in with no friends.
>>28939217
The amount of 'we're all different', 'some things help and some things don't', 'I can only speak for myself', 'do your own research' pseudo-intellectual filler in this post is mind-numbing. If you're not a female, you're the most female-minded man I've ever read.
>>28939267
>>28939217
As a matter of fact, you're far too conceited to ever have been self-loathing.
>>28938616
>How do you tell people you are depressed without sounding like a faggot?
i don't and never will. absolutely NO ONE cares. you need to understand this, no one gives a fuck about you. at best you can maybe tell a psychiatrist for help, other than that don't bother telling anyone, they don't give one flying fuck about you, if you died tomorrow they wouldn't care.
>>28938616
u can't
faggot
>>28939267
It's dickish to clog up OP's thread with a pointless slapfight.
You're just caricaturing everything I said as a shallow platitude for the sake of bickering, and you seem to have a really personal emotional investment in it. I'm sorry we disagree on whatever it is you think we disagree on.
>>28939363
Try to kill yourself with a rope rather than pills next time, clown.
>>28938616
Go and talk to a psychologist. Either that or wait and hope for it to get better. There is no point in talking to people all they will tell you is "just wait it out it will get better".
>>28938616
just depends on who you tell if you sound like a faggot or not
>>28938616
I was hoping for discussion about The Wall.
I'm let down, OP.
When I lived in the dorms, I went through about two semesters where I could not motivate myself to do anything at all. I'd spend literally all day in bed, not even doing anything, just trying to fall back asleep. Eventually, I'd get out of bed, only to sit in my chair and start posting on 4chan or trying to talk to someone on Omegle. It was not fun, and I don't know how I got out of that funk. It was horrible, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I think maybe changing my major helped, but even now, I still have bouts of bad weeks.
>How do you tell people you are depressed without sounding like a faggot?
I don't, for fear of being called a faggot.
Usually, what I do is I hang out with all two of my friends and have a good time and try to forget that I'm depressed. It works pretty well until they're gone and they're busy with their lives again.
I also try to drown it out in a miasma of shitposting and vidya. Vidya doesn't help much, but it's a nice little distraction that keeps me busy for a few hours per day.
I also tried going to a counselor, but I wasn't able to get regular appointments and it kinda turned me off that it's literally their job to listen to you whine. I wish they had an active interest in what I had to say rather than just count the minutes til I walked out.
None of these are good OP, it'll only make you feel worse. You've gotta get better by yourself or you won't get better at all. I sometimes find thatwatching animehelps, especially Welcome to the NHK.
Hang in there man.
>>28938616
Talk to someone who have been on a depression before. Only us will understand. Normalfags won't
Originalmente
>>28939387
This is the first time I'm hoping that the poster is a teenager, rather than a "young adult". If you're older than 16 it's just embarrassing to act like this in this sort of discussion. I will give you this (you) as an offering to satisfy your needs. please go. Or at least focus your epic bantzz on me instead of folks trying to help.
>>28939730
I'm twenty-eight, and you are being a clown by clinging to your notion that being an implied life-seasoned moderate in the thread through your substanceless lectures that there are different kinds of depression and different kinds of treatments... is anything but noise that displaces hard data about effectiveness of each method on each kind. It is people like you who reduce the social expectation for people to provide hard facts rather than 'understanding' and 'perspective', to the effect of hurting depressing people even more. Fucking scum.
>>28939804
>>28939730
tl;dr go seek attention in any other thread.
While I agree with >>28939730 I want to note that it's a different guy from >>28939363 (i.e. me).
OP here, I'd like to thank everyone for their support and help. I'm happy I have people who are disagreeing with each other's advice as it helps me see the advice in another light and lets me personally attune it to my own needs.
A lot of advice has been to change up my routine. However, I believe where I am socially and physically is fine for me. To be completely honest, other than having to change majors and fuck up my first year of uni, I can't complain.
This is also a reason why I would find it hard to tell anyone since I'm pretty sure they wouldn't believe me.
Thank you guys for all the replies, it means a lot.
>>28939804
I'm not the guy you were talking to before.
Also
>28
>>28939920
>thinking about identity on an anonymous board
New.
>>28938771
>>28938986
>>28939217
As someone with a serious mental illness who is on six psych drugs, one of which would kill him if he gets dehydrated, I can't understand all this fuss about drugs.
Some of them are practically harmless, especially in comparison to beloved drugs like caffeine and alcohol.
The risks of depression are real and great.
Drugs aren't necessarily gonna poison your body.
Drugs aren't gonna take away the you in you and personal identity is indeterminate anyway, Parfit is right.
Most don't continue to affect you after you stop taking them.
>>28939325
This, and also unless they've been through similar the chances are they will have no idea what you're talking about and assume you just need to be yourself and get laid to fix it.
>>28938616
Dude.
Get help as soon as you can.
Every minute that you still care about your own well being is worth it. Get a good therapist as soon as possible, so you not get into the state in which I am now. I'm so down that I don't even want to get better. Been for 3 months on Lexapro and stopped because of my stimulant drug binges. I couldn't care if I die tomorrow, I just exist for no point.
If you still care... Please, OP, seek help. This shit isn't nice at all.
>>28939098
See this nigger faggot, OP? When you get this far into depression you start to lash out at good, sound advice, just kill yourself. But you aren't here yet.
Everything this double nigger responded to, do that shit.
>>28940483
I had been much more productive before I read about 'mindfulness' 'meditation' and my brain involuntarily started to tear its own trains of thought into pieces with so-called self-awareness. Thankfully I had enough reason left to notice that that shit is designed just to make you self-absorbed so that you don't even miss the mind wandering that let you have insights. So I more or less recovered from it. But people who actually induce it are probably lose causes.
>>28940602
>>28940483
In other words, the reason that people who 'meditate' are so teeth-grittingly boring is that they have disabled their ability to notice anything but their thoughts. I'll take a reality-aware person over a self-aware one any time.
Go to a therapist. Nobody can really help you with it, and I guarantee nobody really wants to hear it, including your family. Don't ever admit to anyone who's not a blood relative that you're depressed. It won't help you and the majority of people will think less of you for it.
>>28938616
THAT WAKES UP WITH A BITTER TASTE?
IT'S A KING THAT WE PUT UP THERE
AND HE'S A SHORT WAY TO FALL FROM GRACE
IT'S SLOWLY FAILING UPWARD
YOU CAN STAND BUT YOU HAVE NO GROUND
I HEAR IT FROM THE LOST WORDS
THEY SAY IT'S TIME THAT YOU LOST YOUR CROWN
DON'T BE SO GREEDY
A DOLLAR'S A PENNY TO YOU
WHEN HEARTS ARE BEATING
SAY WHAT YOU WANT 'EM TO DO
WASTING AWAY I SEE YOU
WHEN THE TOP OF THE WORLD FALLS ON YOU
FINALLY A DAY, DON'T WANNA BE YOU
WHEN THE TOP OF THE WORLD FALLS ON YOU
>>28940483
He's got autism, and I'm not using that as an insult; he actually has it. He's from poland and really hates meditation and psychedelics. He's on here a good 12+ hours a day. You can pick him up because he's overly wordy and uses single quotes too much.
Make a thread tomorrow about meditation and wait like 15 minutes, I guarantee you he'll show up.
>>28940766
>He's on here a good 12+ hours a day.
I'm pretty sure that in the pic, you claimed it was 15+ or so.
Let me check...
Huh, no, you actually claimed it was 18+.
>>28940893
>>28940766
By the way, I actually am surprised by your backpedalling here, because it implies that you actually care about slandering me, which implies that that '18+ hours' wasn't satire after all, but a genuine attempt, just incredibly off...
>>28940893
I really would recommend that you end your life and stop being a burden on society and everyone around you
>>28940925
>incredibly off
I meant off in terms of being anywhere near plausible, of course, not off in terms of accuracy of the number itself.
>>28940893
>>28940925
>>28940954
Do you ever think about killing yourself sometimes?
>>28940975
Please end your imperative statements with an exclamation mark or a period, and also use the imperative syntax. Using the interrogative syntax and punctuation for them is disingenuous.
They know already. Trust me, they just don't care.
>>28941052
Will you have someone proofread your suicide note before you write it or will you be able to do it yourself?
>>28938616
In spite of the asshole elephant in the room....
I think you should tell your parents first, and frame the discussion this way: You notice this change in thought patterns, and it's been getting worse with time. You're not sure if this change is significant enough to warrant serious measures, and so it seems to be in your best interest to talk to someone, either your parents or more likely a therapist, to sort out if your feelings are "true" depression or a transient thing.
Think of it as going to the doctor for a sore throat. You can't diagnose what's happening in reality on your own with your limited personal experience. Someone who has seen this condition many times would be better qualified to tell you what's happening.
A word about therapists; They cannot solve your problems. They will not have the solution to what is wrong with you. What they can do is be present for you to reflect and self-analyze your thoughts and modes of thinking. You are using them as a mirror in order to see yourself and your thoughts more clearly, by which you can decide to change your thoughts and feelings. If you think of them that way, you will be better off.
There is such a thing as learning how to think. For this idea I'd refer you to the Wallace speech "This is Water". I'm quite aware he did an hero, but it doesn't stop his ideas from being valid. Thinking is a habit, like any other, and habits are hard to change without conscious effort. But with practice, it is possible to change your thought habits until "thinking well" /is/ your habit.
You're gonna make it, even if the hate-bot here doesn't like me saying it.
>>28941609
You literally just said 'the solution to your problems is to think of with a solution'.
>>28941609
>>28941666
*to think of a solution
![Twitter-Those-niggas-who-never-wanna-see-9507b8[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/0Zts3xg.png "Twitter-Those-niggas-who-never-wanna-see-9507b8[1].png")
>>28941666
Nice try, (not really) but wrong. And what, precisely, is /your/ solution?
I guarantee you, OP, this double tap fuccboi does not care if you get better.
>>28941872
Depending on the question, particular exercises, particular choices of school/library/degree, particular choices of car/transportation, of personal care products, of software, of clothing, of... of... of... Anything than a dismissive fuck-you of a platitude that 'you should be a master of your own thinking, that will help, cya'.
>>28942221
Whether my advice or your advice helps is up to OP to decide. Now they've seen both. I'll let them decide. But don't bitch when someone else tries to contribute. You haven't got a monopsony on meaning, Klein.
Dont tell anyone about your depression anon, I've tried that in the past and they will just say you're lying or to get over it.
Don't do it all
All my friends abandoned me after, i told them things they didn't want to hear even though they asked.
>>28939325
Pretty much this. When I was at my lowest point I told my parents in desperation hoping they'd help in some way. "Lol anon depression is all in your head, we all have bad days XDDD". Yeah OK, all that substance abuse just to feel some modicum of happiness was because I was just memeing. Fucking normies i swear
>>28939804
Jesus dude calm the fuck down
>>28943858
you can explain your viewpoint without being a twat
>>28943469
Another unfortunate victim of the free will delusion.
>>28940409
More exactly, the "just choose to be happy" meme.
