ITT we post autistic things we have done
staring at the oven for an hour
>>28852889
>Be me
>Grade 5 no friends
>Chads and normies joking around and having "fun"
>I try to join in
>Chad pins me to the wall and chokes me
>after hes done manhandling me Stacy calls me a jerk
> in a fit of autistic rage I went out to the playground after school
> I head to the sandbox and destroy the sand castle chad and his friends had worked all week to make
>Let out an autistic battlecry and go home to my mom crying
Mfw Vice Principal does nothing
>be 4
>pee in plastic cups and throw them in the sink when the bathroom was taken
Good practice for peeing in bottles 17 years later
>>28852889
When i was 13 i used to regularly piss under the carpet in my room because i was afraid to go to the bathroom in the dark during nighttime
In the morning when my mom asked about the smell i said that the cat must have pissed somewhere
This went on for a year, my mom eventually stopped asking about it
At one point i considered pissing out of the window because when the piss hit the floor it was loud and it could wake my parents up next door but i didn't do it because i live in the city and someone could have seen my wee wee
Eventually i got used to the smell of dried piss since i spent all my time playing vidya/watching tv and would only notice the smell when i exit and then reenter the room after 5 minutes
i also used to come under the carpet
My room still kind of smells like dried piss and cum althrough i stopped doing it so long ago, maybe because that carpet hasn't been washed in 10 years
>>28853068
>that carpet hasn't been washed in 10 years
Jesus christ what the fuck anon?
I clean my carpet every 3 months, and it gets pretty fucking nasty in those 3 months
Why the fuck wouldnt you clean it for 10 fucking years?
>>28853068
I also used to shit in the shower when the toilet room was taken because i would hold it in until the last moment so i don't have to stop playing vidya and couldn't hold it in anymore
>>28853103
My mom just dusts it from time to time
When I was 12 I took a shit in my neighbor's driveway. It was a suburban gated community, so everyone was out at work or at school. As far as I know nobody saw me, nobody said anything about it to me, and I was still invited over there along with the rest of my family on a regular basis.
I filled out this chart with pictures of real girls I've had crushes on.
The autistic icing on the cake is that now I feel gross for having put 3DPD in this image.
>>28853118
>My mom just dusts it from time to time
>dusts the carpet
Nigger, you're supposed to fucking shampoo that shit monthly.
What the fuck?
I mean I know robots are known for living in filthy but holy shit that's nasty.
You probably have some fucking worm and rat colony under there growing
>>28853135
I have 5 or 6 folders full of pics of celeb girls that I daydream about going out with, and now that I've written it out it just hit me how disturbing that is and I'm going to go delete them now. The folders, I mean.
>>28853198
>celeb girls
So you mean Stacies
Why delete them from your computer when you could delete them irl?
>>28853160
A robots life is Sad, Lonely and filthy. Its not the life I would of chosen but Its the life I got
>Sometime during grade school
>Some bitch calls me creepy
>mfw
>Steal her homework from her cubby when she isn't looking
>Shit
>Use homework as toilet paper
>Flush
It's been at least a decade and I still haven't been caught.
stutter while talking to normies at work
>>28853216
>I would of chosen
Well you're choosing to keep posting instead of fucKING SHAMPOOING THAT NASTY CARPET
>>28852889
Everytime I order pizza I end up stuttering when talking to the delivery person this happens with no other people just pizza people
>>28852889
watched anime
>>28853248
Order online.
lol captcha was pizzas
Please post a picture of the bottom of the carpet.
>>28853222
Excellent work anon.
I used to sneak in after class and scatter peoples things all around the classroom
mfw i never got caught
Sometimes when I'm laying in my bed I pretend to be the MC of my own anime series that fights imaginary demons.
>>28853103
>unironically washing/cleaning anything in your room
.
.
.
REEE FUCK OFF NORMIE CLEANFAG
>>28853222
Someone pissed me off in middle school so I waited until no one was looking and he was out of the room and threw his backpack out of the window. It landed on a bus picking younger kids up and the bus drove off with all of his shit on top. It was not retrieved and somehow no one caught me.
>>28853103
Also i'm no americano so i don't wear shoes inside the house so the carpet doesn't get dirty as fast
why do people do this? even if you don't know anything about guns don't you see how retarded that plan looks? it drives me mad every time I see a drawing like this or whatever shit.
1. Writing the residence manager at my college an insane letter proving my innocence when they booked me for my dorm smelling like weed
2. One time when I was a kid I made thanksgiving stuffing in the middle of summer and ate the whole batch in one sitting and then vommitted a bunch
>>28853269
I'm not at home atm but if this tread is still alive when i come home i will deliver
>>28853342
Ikrtbhfam the artwork is good tho desy
>>28853222
Wonderous Pepe and beautiful Trips anon!
My latest story involves me lighting myself on fire while under the influence!
>arrive to record store since I'm NEET and there's nothing else to do in the timespan of the next few hours+it's close
>smoke in the parking lot
>while smoking hair fell down and lit on fire
>fuck
>pat my face really fucking hard but I feel no pain
>walk into record store
>there's a lot of people today
>fuck
>anxiety all of a sudden shoots through the fucking roof it's a weekday and it's in the middle of the fucking week there shouldn't be this many people
>should also mention I'm chewing gum this becomes important in a bit I've been chewing it for 7 hours straight
>as I walk in notice that it smells like burnt
>realize I'm the reason it smells like burn shit
>fuck I need to hit a restroom so I can see how bad
>walk to restroom
>staff member stops me
>says I can't go in the bathroom
>ask why?
>he responds "oh you don't know Kieth thank god"
>my autism sparks with a thousand hurrring rockbacks "KIETH FUCKING MORRIS?!"
>staff member immediately shakes head
>looks at me a second time
>"bro your head..."
>"W-w-w-what?"
>"your head is like bleeding..."
>"Oh thanks!"
>"No problem just don't b-"
>Kieth Morris comes out of the bathroom
>I look at him in excitement but as I go to say something to him gum fucking melts in mouth
>turns out 5 gum melts in your mouth after a certain amount of time
>he looks at me and we make eye contact
>"KIETH"
>is what I try to say
>however the gum makes me say "KYETHHH"
>gum fucking dribles out of my mouth because it was a massive fucking wad
>he looks at me in disgust almost until I swallow it and repeat myself
>he points at my head and I say "I know"
>introduce myself and we talk eventually fist bump got me wet af
>proceed to bathroom
>OH FUCK
>I melted skin off my fucking forehead and scorch a little of my hairline
and that is how I met Kieth Morris of Black Flag with some added autism!
Tfw all the normie kids get mad at me for having a rotten apple in my locker causing the entire hallway reek of the foulest stench known to men
>>28853436
No fuck you that's so fucking gross god damn you. You're probably not even white.
>>28853462
I am as white as they come my dude although my best friend at the time was a Muslim weeaboo
>>28852889
/k/ here, that picture's stupid because she's not pointing it at the right angle and thus would blow off her jaw and most of her face.
>>28853586
/a/ here
Your point is irrelevant and stupid because when Homura shot herself she wasnt actually trying to kill herself, she was using it to get out of a situation in a fight and cause a distraction.
This absolutely stunning, smart, kind, and overall amazing girl I had a crush on throughout highschool asked me out last May, saying she'd liked me for years, and that I was her first highschool crush. We were good friends for years. We bonded over liking Berserk, Ghiblie, various videogames, and webcomics and stuff.
It was her first relationship and she was really shy and nervous, so I took things slow, let her make the first moves. She initiated the first kiss by basically telling me to do it, one of us would always ask before holding hands or cuddling. We never did more than that
I'm a transfag (MtF) and her parents are super conservative and didn't approve of us dating, or even understand the fact that she was bi, so she felt really uncomfortable and broke up with me after less than a month. I told her I thought I was falling for her, she thought about it and said she just didn't feel the same and that it seemed too soon to say that, and I felt SUPER embarrassed so I tried to backtrack and say that maybe I was just projecting unresolved feelings from my first relationship that I'd gotten out of a little while ago, but that only made the situation WORSE and she didn't talk to me for months
When I briefly talked to her friend about it, she implied that she was just using the parent thing as an excuse and that it was really because things were moving too fast for her, which confused the hell out of me because we never did more than kiss a few times, which she initiated most of the time
We made up eventually but I've been too embarrassed to talk to her other than to wish her a happy birthday, and when she wished me one
Fuck...talking about this makes me want to not be sober. I hate how awkward I am
>bought components for a gaming pc
>couldnt do it
>just leave it there and go back to phoneposting
Havent even touched it in like 3 months
>>28853731
Doesn't sound like you did anything particularly cringeworthy.
>>28853910
I feel like an idiot for saying I was falling for her after she broke things off, and then the subsequent backtracking, because she felt hurt and self conscious about the idea that someone doesn't really like her for her
but I appreciate you saying that
>>28853757
Can you send me the parts please
I'll try to pay you for em n stuff, but I know how to put em together, I could just never afford any PC that wasnt from a garage sale
Putting trip on so no one pretends to be me if you say yes
>>28853757
It's literally as easy as building Lego, retard.
>sports family that cheers on sideline
>sometimes I'd shout commonly said things with them to seem normal
>sporty family puts me in rugby team
>playing two years up with my brother because its easier for mum and dad
>would read childish fantasy books on the way to a game, warm up, play the game, go to the car and continue reading
>younger than team mates but manchild
>hairy as fuck belly
>always change clothes super quick and try and hide it
>high school rugby
>parents and school lie to me and say you NEED to play a sport
>play rugby
>I'm the same age as the team mates now but a grade below them in school
>Don't know any of them
>get put in 3rd best team
>bunch of loud, lazy and stupid chads
>couple of okay people
>get put in 2nd best team
>these chads are worse and taller than me
>get put in 1st best team
>these chads are taller and smarter and chaddier than the others
>would "go to training" and hide in toilets
>end up in 3rd best team again
>play there until I figure out the 1 sport rule was bullshit
>big sports day against rival sports school
>we're losing so my teams chads are playing dirty
>eventually fight starts
>just walk off the field because it was stupid imo
>get yelled at for walking off
In both club and school rugby when we were losing my team started acting really mean, stomping on the opposition, kicking them when they're down
I tried it a few times, stepping on people and stuff, but I think you need to be angry when it happens for it to feel good or something
Still feel nothing about playing or watching sports, I honestly can't understand how people get so emotional about sports
Mum had me tested as a kid "mild assburgers" also "dyslexic"
I'm pretty autistic or maybe not
Hope my greentext counts as autistic shit I've done
>>28854223
thats the autistic part
>>28853731
>I'm a transfag
post butt pics please
>>28852889
>be me
>in primary school
>be autistic loner
>every time during recess some guy 3 years older than me (pretty significant difference when you're 5 years old) and 2 of his friends force me to show my penis
>sick of this shit
>one day after school, loudly shout "Hey, show your wiener!" at the fucker
>turned out it was his identical twin brother
>>28853040
>yfw you invented practice piss bottles
>>28854283
>"mild assburgers"
>>28853318
I dust my desk once a week, but that's only to prevent my laptop fans from getting clogged up.
>>28852889
oboy here we go
stumbled upon porn when I was like 7-8 and it all went downhill from there, got into the weird shit quick and used to try and finger my dog and stick pencils up her (poor pupper, dead now from non-pencilfuck related health issues) and watched heaps of that weird 3D ogre and elf shit + dog n horse porn and hunted down CP on more than a few occasions before I realized how fucked that was and used to never be able to sleep properly because id just sit staring at the wall thinking about some fat chick getting railed by a horse and brutalizing my clit til I passed out from exhaustion, happened for a while til I was about 12-13 and I decided to try and get my shit together bc chubby with terrible hygiene, worked for a while through highschool but not for too long, still an unsociable fucking nolife retard with social anxiety and weird fets to this day gg
used to piss in this little tin ornamental bucket in my room when I was 7ish, I'd cover the top of it with a book and then pour it out of my window when it got 2rank, no idea why
> college dormroom (single) has a sink
> use sink instead of piss bottles
>>28852889
>ITT we post autistic things we have done
>doesn't post anything
fuck off back to /r/4chan
>>28853160
>You probably have some fucking worm and rat colony under there growing
>>28855437
i know you didnt know, but this reaction image belongs to me and you cant post it. now you know, so if you post it again i will do something
>>28855452
>so if you post it again i will do somethingsaved btw
cannot reply to this thread
>>28854762
It was quite a ride to read that post
