Late one night while taking a walk through the local park, an old mysterious man walks up to you and offers you a personal gift for helping him in a past life.
He opens his coat and presents to you a couple of enchanted and cursed artifacts, of which YOU CAN ONLY CHOOSE ONE.
Which do you choose /pol/?
***The Dagger of Marcus Brutus***
>If you use this cursed dagger to stab to death people who has viewed you as a trust worthy friend, their life expectancy will be added to yours in addition to acquiring their knowledge and skills.
>Investigations on the deaths of those killed with the dagger will never point to you, but instead to others. (Unless their were witnesses or caught on camera)
***John Wilkes Booth's Flintlock Pistol***
>You gain the ability to summon a small mysterious pistol from a pocket dimension located behind your back.
>It has the ability to 1 shot kill anybody within 10 yards, but reloading takes 1 minute in the pocket dimension.
>The pocket dimension is roughly the size of an avenge school backpack, so you can store other things in there if you'd like.
*** Simo Häyhä's Mosin Nagant***
>Although it does not give you the skill that Simo had, when wielding this legendary rifle (with limitless ammo) you no longer require sleep, don't need to eat or drink, you feel no cold, can't get sick, can't age, and don't need to use the bathroom.
>In other words, this rifle allows a person to stay in an attack position stalking a target for all eternity if they desire or basically gives you biological immortality when touching it.
Continued...
*** Lee Harvey Oswald's Mannlicher-Carcano Rifle***
>This infamous rifle only comes with 15 special rounds, but when targeting someone through its scope, it will always hit and kill them (within 1500 yards). No exceptions, you cannot miss, it's always a headshot.
>The direction of the noise produced by the rifle's blast will never point in your direction, giving you the luxury of having 20 minutes to escape.
***Gavrilo Princip’s FN M1910***
>This demonic pistol hold 3 special rounds that when fired into the ground of whatever country you're currently in, will cause foreign countries to declare war and ruthlessly attack until it is nothing but ash.
>This pistol is also indestructible and never jams. It also feeds any pistol ammo.
***Napoleon Bonaparte's Saber***
>This beautifully decorated saber allows the owner to gain an unholy level of charisma and trust. So much so, that the owner of the saber will be able to personally choose to gain the loyalty of 15 military or federal officials of any country and 100,000 troops of any military force in the world.
>The loyalty of these 15 officials and 100,000 troops is forever unbreakable. They will fight to the death and will never doubt your orders.
***Sun Tzu's Calligraphy Pen***
>When carrying this blessed pen you will be able to see the weaknesses, flaws, fears, and doubts of any person, country or organization.
>This pen will basically allow you to see how a person, country or organization can be destroyed.
this is not /x/
post your SCP-Foundation Roleplay somewhere else.
>>71050263
/x/?
They don't like to have fun, this is straight outta /tg/.
Now hurry up and choose a gift.
>>71050383
weapons are illegal in Germany, can you make up something less violent please?
>>71050759
You sure are taking this Cuck meme seriously aren't ya?
>>71050759
Same, California is pretty strict. We wouldn't want to be able to fight back or anything.
The Brutus dagger would be the best choice, it offers so much
>>71050759
Take the fucking pen!
>>71051198
I think you mean the Pen, it makes you into Batman
>>71051236
>>71051287
This
The Pen is by far the wisest choice.
>>71050168
>***Sun Tzu's Calligraphy Pen***
>>When carrying this blessed pen you will be able to see the weaknesses, flaws, fears, and doubts of any person, country or organization.
>>This pen will basically allow you to see how a person, country or organization can be destroyed.
Hands down, I would pick this.
>>Find the faults of Ted Cruz's campaign
>>Destroy it
>>Wait until Clinton gets the nomination
>>Find out how to destroy her
>>Meme Trump into office
Alternatively write "anti-X" where X is whatever you want.
>>71051554
True, however it only gives you the knowledge.
You're still just an average nobody, who would listen to you?
The only way to make your voice heard would be to blackmail your way to a live interview.
Either the pen or napoleons sabre. Instead of using the 100 000 soldiers for war, use them to spread political dissent in a cuck country (Germany for example) when things go to shit and anarchy or civil war erupts you will have a loyal fighting force to push your ideology.
>>71052079
You also have to remember that it isn't necessarily only 100,000 troops. The officials you recruit can have people that are loyal to them that may follow along.
Your army can go from 100,000 to 500,000 depending how famous and respected your generals are.
>>71050168
Ill do the first one If family counts because tfw no friends and will need a lot of time to get that down
>>71051198
You need to have friends for it to work, senpai.
>all of these "artifacts" are destructive
>almost all of them are weapons
Who the fuck did I help in a past life?
>>71053450
Donald Trump
>>71050168
>Napoleon Bonaparte's Saber
This is the best one because if you can get an army of 100,000 gurkha soldiers and there is no military force on the planet that can stop you.
>>71050103
Anyone gonna make this into a poster or do I have to?
>Take moist nugget
>saw off stock and barrel
>Carry with me at all times
100,000 troops to play video games with me and watch movies with me :3
>>71053853
Please do, I'd appreciate it greatly
>>71050168
>***Gavrilo Princip’s FN M1910***
OP pls nerf
>>71054219
>100,000 female troops
Mmmm
>>71051877
>implying I don't know magic already and lack of knowledge of my enemies weaknesses is the main obstacle
Well shit, I'd like the pen but since everyone is picking it...
The Flintlock ofJohn Wilkes Booth. A flintlock isn't exactly a common murder weapon. Ignoring the fact that the type of weapon alone rules me out as a suspect in any murders it literally exists in a pocket dimension. You can literally kill anyone, there can be fucking witnesses and could still possibly be found innocent.
>>71054470
They're all OP in their own special way
>>71053672
women leaders, nice joke
>>71054615
And you can store things in the pocket dimension.
You can turn into the greatest smuggler in the world.
Even if you got arrested, you can always keep guns and bombs in the dimension to escape.
>>71050168
While I'd really like one of the ones that lets me get eternal life, I think I'd be tempted to not be selfish and instead go for Gavrilo Princip's FN M1910.
Removing kebab would never be easier, the word would truly be a better place.
>>71054624
>instakilling a country is not OP
>>71055036
Yeah but it's only 3 countries. Much of the rest of the world will be ok.
MAGIC MOSIN
>>71055036
Only 3, if anything its a giant twase since its enough to start purging the Earth of degeneracy but not enough to ensure total victory.
You could never purge quite enough of the Middle East or Africa to make a difference but taking out Israel ensures mudslime dominance in the region. Taking out India dramamtically reduces the worlds population but benefits kebabs since they hate India.
What three countries and the potential consequneces could be its own thread desu
>>71055522
>>71055949
I read it as any three rounds loaded into it become magic bullets. Why else would it mention that it takes any kind of pistol ammo?
>>71056326
That's just an extra bonus.
A gun that never breaks and can take any ammo.
>>71050168
I want Le Pen
>>71051236
While the pen is certainly interesting, I have a huge hard on for basic immortality, so I will be taking the white deaths rifle.
>>71050168
I already have the pen...So I guess I'll take the saber to round it out...Thanks old mysterious dude!
>>71050103
I'm not a sociopath, so I'd say John Wilkes Booth's handgun or Simo's rifle.
With the rifle, by the way, how does that really work? I just never feel hungry? How would one gain/lose weight or muscle?
>>71053876
No obrez allowed, bubba
>>71058337
Yeah I was going to say the flintlock because I think access to a pocket dimension anywhere would be one of the most useful powers, but if the rifle cures disease when I touch it, I want the rifle.
>>71058337
Your body's state is paused, once you let go of the rifle you it will unpause.
Simo's rifle, I essentially have the rest of eternity to do whatever I need to.
Btw, does the effect only work when you hold it? Or could you also sling it?
>>71059485
That's lame. Fine, can I Obrez it at least? 91/30s are fucking long.
>>71059676
Yes you may, but you sacrifice accuracy
>>71059571
Skin contact
>>71050103
Pistol
>>71059571
>>71059676
By the way it's only biological immortality, you can still be killed
>>71060295
I don't care about that, I'll just cut it down to bare minimum functional length and enjoy my immortality.
>>71050103
The Original Southern Avenger
>>71060295
Can I modify it in anyway I want so long as it has original furniture?
Maybe I want to rechamber it, or turn it into an automatic. Or give it a fuckhuge jezzail barrel.
>>71060442
Oh, one more thing. How does the illness part work exactly? Any disease whatsoever? What about conditions that one might already have?
>>71051440
>The Pen is by far the wisest choice.
>>71060953
Anon is asking if it will cure his autism.
I'd go for the gun that made you immortal if it didn't mean I had to give up taking a shit. Life's only remaining pleasure is taking a good dump.
>>71061197
I don't have autism. Got tested for that, actually. I was wondering if it would cure my ADD, or my asthma, or more specifically my eczema and skin problems.
>>71050103
>>71050168
>Not choosing the Dagger of Marcus Brutus
Sure it'll be tough to use, but in time the powers of every other item can be acquired through it. Plus, realistically, it'll only need to be used once every few decades.
>>71060647
The rifle needs to be in a condition where it can still fire a round.
Cannot be rechambered.
>>71060953
You're immune to any disease and venom. You can fuck a person with aids and be ok. Any ailments you had prior to wielding the gun is still there, but they won't harm you anymore as long as you're touching it.
>>71050103
>immortality
Mosin Nagant definitely as long as I can keep its existence a secret
>>71050168
>choose Napoleon's Saber
>overthrow P*tin
>purge literally everyone from the government
>replace them with people who actually know how to do their job
>Make Russia Great Again
Дa!
>take Mosin Nagant
>quit job
>sell all worldly possessions to smuggle myself into the most inhospitable vantage point in Africa
>Become Moonman
>Centuries later Africans consider me a death deity whispered only in myth
>>71063268
Are you autistic?
>>71062972
>napoleon's saber
>gets control of elements in Russian Government
>Civil War breaks out
>try to invade moscow during winter
>lose
>>71050103
*** Simo Häyhä's Mosin Nagant***
Strap it to my back tight so I become immortal
>>71063327
This is /pol/
I'm surprised more answers aren't about undermining the ZOG or something
The dagger is the thinking man's pen. You can accomplish everything on that list eventually with the dagger.
>>71063268
holy fuck thats great, i lold too hard
>>71063889
Yes and it also involves being a horrific shitbag sociopath who befriends people in order to murder them. You're like a fucking vampire, slurping up people's lives and talents.
>>71050103
>>71050168
Hands down, Sun-Tzu's Calligraphy pen
It makes my dick hard just thinking of owning that
Would sell my soul/10
>>71064392
>muh morals
18+ kiddo
>>71064392
I'm not saying it wouldn't be evil, but in the long run depending on how you played it, you could set up the foundations for a genuine planet-wide utopia. Which would offset the cost of however many countless people you slayed.
>>71050168
>Saber
>unholy levels
So can I bring back famous generals from the dead, like Napoleon, Sun Tzu, Hannible, Patton, etc. and an army of undead?
>take mosin
>reforge it into a bunch of Rings of Power
>create a secret society of immortals
>>71065676
That would end up like highlander.
>>71050168
I'd choose pen, but I'd be afraid the jews would quickly catch on me and kill me before I take down anything worthy.
The knife would have been my choice, but why the fuck do I want immortality and savantism if it's to live in such a piece of shit degenerate world.
I choose the FN M1910
Shoot it once in Israel, second shot in the US, and third shot in China.
I just got rid of a very large part of the jew and degeneracy menace, Israel and US and took down the world population by over a billion, giving humanity more time to get their shit together.
>>71065809
I would make myself one master ring then, all others would be subject to my will
Guys OP here, I'm going to tweak this up and post it again tonight.
Thanks for all the feed back.
>>71050168
Napoleon's Saber
>>71052079
This, these ones can give you true power.
>>71057770
Immortality and limitless ammo is the only right choice, maybe the pen but it's to much death note.
GOD TIER
>Sabre
>Pen
GREAT TIER
>Dagger
>Flintlock
>FN M1910
OK TIER
>Mannlicher-Carcano Rifle
personally would go with sabre to create my own fighting force, with the 15 officials chosen specifically so that they may be able to subvert and take power in countries of my choosing, then create my own world empire
>>71066960
You forgot the Nugget
>>71065614
you can do the same with the Mosin Nagant + being able to see the difference between white and black skin.
>>71067064
Shit, nugget in great tier since it has infinite ammo and almost immortality
still not enough to match the pen/sabre though
>>71067206
Except it would be nigh on impossible. You'd get shot or disarmed long before you achieved anything.
>>71063268
Holy shit I'm screenshoting that
>>71067206
>>71050103
Dagger. I would find myself a job in a retirement home, hospice, or similar and endear myself to all the patients as their favorite nurse. Listen to all their stories, etc. Then, when their time drew near, I would kill them alone in their rooms until I had amassed the knowledge and wisdom to move onto phase II.
>>71050168
Napoleon's saber please.
OP HERE
NEW AND IMPROVED THREAD
>>71070604
>>71070604
>>71070604
>>71070604
>>71063268
Are you implying that there will be Africans left after you are done have these stories and pass them on?
Not a very good Moonman then.
