I tried capturing a shot of my roommate drunk here and my iphones lens doesnt zoom... What do I do? Is there a lens attachment I could get?
>>2804283
I can't give you the attachment specifications without a picture of her tits mate. Also did you fuck her?
>>2804287
Planning on it!
olloclip.com
It's an iPhone, therefore there are a fuckton of lens accessories for it. From pricey "real" ones, to cheap Chinese shit.
Sounds like a lot of work bro
>>2804283
If you pinch the screen the camera app zooms.
Buy the Pro Cam app.
>>2804354
>implying digital zoom is useful in any way
>>2804410
>wanting optical zoom on a fucking phone
Just get a real camera you stupid fucking cunt
>>2804295
>Hi, I'm Brian!
She looks good from the back. Does she look as good from the front?
>>2804630
she looks good from far, but far from good
>>2804651
But far too good to go
>>2804283
She looks like Elise from Funhaus...
>>2804283
this is /p/
>tfw you will never ever have a girl love you
I like photography because it takes my mind of my loneliness and I still get to see shit like this in /p/ that reminds me ;_;
>>2804283
Here's what to do friend.
1. Tits on here now
2. Head STRAIGHT to Ken Rockwell, read the reviews and post a thread on /p/ about mirrorless
4. Next head over to /r/Photography and make a thread a day, each with slightly different wording about whether you really need a DSLR to be a "photographer"
5. After a few days of this you'll be ready, but you need a credit card for this step so maybe swing by the bank. Head straight to amazon and buy a Canon 1Dx Mark II. It's really good, most people on /p/ have one
6. You'll need lenses obviously, but us photographers call them "glass", as in "that's some sick glass you got there bro!" when you see someone with a really big piece of glass. Never say lens. Ever.
7. Buy a 50mm lens, it doesn't matter that you can't change the zoom, only casuals need zoom.
>wildlife photography? zoom with legs
>sports photography? zoom with legs
>deep space astrophotography? zoom with legs
Make sure you make a thread on /r/Photography about how great "prime lenses" are. You'll also want a light meter. Trust me.
8. Once this all arrives do an unboxing thread. It's important that any criticism is responded to by calling that person poor.
9. Now you have you're starter camera it's time to head out, before you do though make sure to make a thread about how you're interested in going back to what photography was build on, film photography. It'll be there when you get back don't worry.
10. Head STRAIGHT to the poorest area around you. Remember you bought a lens with no zoom? Use your legs, only commies zoom. Start blasting photos of the tramp and using the light meter. People will know you're a pro.
11, Head home, post on /p/ about the best software for "post". Don't use any of it's features though, put the photos in black and white and start a new thread, fill it with these masterpieces. Listen to none of the advice posted.
You're now one of us, congrats brother.
>>2808902
This should be pasta
>>2808902
>>2808902
>>2808902
Based
>>2809084
There are some tricky memes in this threead
>>2808902
What's 3)?
>>2808902
>>2808902
>wildlife photography? zoom with legs
>sports photography? zoom with legs
>deep space astrophotography? zoom with legs
Oh jesus lost my shit here. My fucking sides in deep space as well m8
>>2808902
>Start blasting photos of the tramp
/p/ doesn't take photos of people, they don't know how to talk to anyone
Try buying a real camera instead of using a fucking iphone.
>>2809652
So, a Samsung then?
>>2808902
>Never say lens. Ever.
>7. Buy a 50mm lens
>>2804283
well OP you tried your best and we all got a good fap out of it, top tier photography man
>>2804283
WHERE IS THE FOLLOW-UP POST, OP? MORE ASS. DO IT NOW. WHAT THE FUCK. ASS. NOW.
>>2814195
Did you really fap to this? I just about emptied my balls
>>2808902
>deep space astrophotography? zoom with legs
I fucking love you, anon. I really do.
>>2809541
>a zoom lens is typically used to avoid having a leonardo dicaprio moment with a bear, to avoid being tackled by security at a soccer game, and to avoid numerous scenarios involving vertigo, as well as many other things.
>>2814495
Hello newfriend
