Hey /out/
In two weeks I visit my 12th music festival. We are going to camp for 4 days.
It's all fun however there is one inconvenience I want to prevent. I'm going to drink ALOT of beer and afterwards I have soft and greasy shits. It's not diarrhia, just very very very smeary. So I have to wipe endlessly.
Last time I used a whole box of baby wipes in one sitting and there was still shit on it.
So my question. How to I get my shit dry. I DON'T want to get constipated. I just want to shit pretty little dry and hard turds.
Any suggestions?
How baout you wipe your ass with toilet paper instead of baby wipes you little faggot.
>>791810
This.
Also avoid other greasy food. Eat a lot of spinach.
Eat stuff like bread or popcorn.
>>791810
I do. First I use toilet paper and afterwards baby wipes. I mean, how are those festival fuccbois supposed to fuck my ass if I don't do it, r-right?
Eat ryebread as breakfast, and whole grain bread.
Take fiber supplement.
Okay. I guess I will try to regulate it over my food.
Oatmeal, bread, no greasy food, guess a lot of water is good too.
load up on soluble fiber (about twice daily dosage). Will come out quick and solid.
Only thing is it will come up on you fast, not like diarrhea or upset stomach but more like 'Now is the time'
>>791821
You might want to cleanse your intestine with an enema if you're into that. No dry poop for you.
>>791807
if you got loose poops, take acidophilus or however youspell it
if you've got diahhrreah shit my pants oh no im in trouble - poops, take immodium, it'll totally cure your shits and you wont have to dump for 5-10 hours. i use em all the time at work (innawoods)
>>794023
This. Started taking Metamucil a few months back after talking to my doctor. Didn't realize just how messed up my GI tract was until I worked my way up to doing 2 scoops twice a day. Now you can set your clock by my shits, and one-wipe clean.
Smoke some opium over the days you're at the festival
>>794684
sorry but does this mean you often have diarrhea and it's stopping you from doing your work?
I need to know
>>791807
Finger in butthole style
>>791807
Fucking hell it's A
LOT
not "alot"
why didn't you learn that in primary school
>inb4 fix your own punctuation
>>796187
>>796213
if you're shitting 50 times a day you got something else to worry about.
ever think maybe if you weren't such a manky bastard and washed your hands, ate a balanced diet and didn't just binge drink you might have solid stool? fucking kids.
>>794768
+1. Sometimes it's good to be near a toilet at first when it is kickin in but then you won't need to drop one for a couplw days and it will be rock solid when you do.
I would just double up on some hydrocodone. I take then when I'm out im the woods camping usually plugs me up for a good 4 days.
>>796238
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