Howdy, partner!
What you see here began as a series of comedy-centric stories with the concept of an alicorn-ascended Princess Applejack trying to change a mismanaged Equestria for the better by humorously interacting with the other, quite lazy, princesses.
Not to mention a whole bunch of Changelings with nothing better to do but cause mischief.
The whole thing was set in motion by this gem:
~~~~~
>So, wait, why am Ah' a princess again?
>Because you seem to be the only goddamn one of those ponies who gets that a Princess need to do actual work regarding maintenance of the kingdom. You know how much city planning or trade negotiations Twilight or Luna have done? Fucking nothing. Everyone is obsessed with the world ending threats they think I should fight, but the minute I point out the free health care I have to work to maintain everyone goes quiet. And don't even get me started on Cadence, who can't even manage a basic meeting with the Equestrian Games representative. Fucking annoying. Go do actual princess stuff, because apparently everyone else got the pamphlets mixed up or something and thinks "Princess" means "Beat cop."
~~~~~
Are you feeling creative? Try your hand at writing a story! No contribution is too small and we love having new folks around.
If you're more artistically inclined give a drawing or sketch a shot. Don't fret too much; it doesn't have to be fancy and we appreciate artwork a lot.
If that isn't your style either, writers always need feedback. So tell us what you liked - and what you didn't - to help us improve.
If you are unsure about anything, do not be afraid to ask. We will gladly bring you up-to-date or explain anything you feel is unclear.
Thread 139! Time for Applejack and Chrysalis to shine!
>>27347570
gg no re v2
>>27347570
>>27347576
I'm just fuckin m8, I'll stop
>>27347570
Where are all the links?
>>27347642
>4chan kept telling me it didn't post so I kept retrying
links soon, gimme a sec I've never done this before
>>27347570
1 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/15714689/
2 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/15809561/
3 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/15905493/
4 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/15993073/
5 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16130720/
6 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16246841/
7 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16379525/
8 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16501328/
9 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16610392/
10 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16662074/
11 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16772586/
12 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16868468/
13 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/16979374/
14 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17077404/
15 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17165620/
16 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17236861/
17 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17353012/
18 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17432909/
19 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17542878/
20 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17622856/
21 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17721007/
22 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17846420/
23 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17939772/
24 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18016936/
25 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18110396/
26 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18243130/
27 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18317690/
28 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18413021
29 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18481892
30 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18584132
30.5 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18593663/
31 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18666146/
32 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18726218/
33 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18808995/
34 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/18917077/
35 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19037167/
36 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19139609/
37 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19224385/
38 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19310984/
39 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19418937/
40 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19541053/
41 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19662234/
42 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19775771/
43 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/19893243/
44 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20044646/
45 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20179745/
46 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20296634/
47 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20365095/
48 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20453513/
49 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20580492/
50 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20667911/
51 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20740272/
52 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20855918/
53 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/20948915/
54 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21045744/
55 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21159397/
56 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21278151/
57 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21405993/
58 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21510114/
59 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21619890/
60 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21715642/
61 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21858107/
62 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/21945390/
63 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22007346/
64 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22086019/
65 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22152409/
66 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22223659/
67 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22274618/
68 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/
69 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22395817/
70 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22458614/
71 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22571091/
72 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22651546/
73 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22736626/
74 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22828938/
75 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22908818/
76 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22963669/
77 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23030892/
78 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23102420/
79 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23200765/
80 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23282365/
81 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23369224/
82 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23443675/
83 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23520799/
84 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23581564/
85 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23656624/
86 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23764354/
87 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23878745/
88 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/23973977/
89 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24059974/
90 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24160401/
91 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24245691/
92 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24333335/
93 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24423649/
94 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24476469/
95 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24523227/
96 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24574722/
97 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24626415/
98 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24690967/
99 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24759374/
100 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24814923/
101 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24894930/
102 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/24958159/
103 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25046878/
104 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25132701/
105 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25222467/
106 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25301100/
107 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25385359/
108 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25460161/
109 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25529408/
110 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25616096/
111 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25673487/
112 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25717170/
113 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25779356/
114 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25832901/
115 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25893943/
116 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/25941085/
117 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26008453/
118 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26066966/
119 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26124883/
120 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26194825/
121 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26278593/
122 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26346142/
123 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26411050/
124 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26477997/
125 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26540512/
126 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26606754/
127 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26679572/
128 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26739492/
129 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26795242/
130 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26851945/
130.5 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26904000/
131 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/26966812
132 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27045491
133 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27091818
134 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27136045
135 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27192560
136 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27243315
137 desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27268873
Here is full archive of the stories in condensed, easy-to-read form with all chatter in-between removed.
Check out the pastebin here:
http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessApplejack
Curious what happened last time?
Check out the previous thread here:https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/27268873
You are completely new and have no idea what is going on? There is a wikia with an overview of all characters, a complete timeline, previous thread recaps and explanation of the various concepts used in these stories!
Check out the wiki here:http://princess-aj.wikia.com/wiki/Princess_Applejack_Wiki
Confused about when a character first showed up or who they are? Want to know when an arc started?
Check out character notes and details here :
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650
Check out the 'Princess Applejack: Re-Cut Edition' here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/15cv3kqExr_vOM0JkUh4dqnvVKxJ5Z-P1KHwE8Z7aG0k/edit?usp=sharing
And finally, while most of the thread is very much clop free, we have a pastebin in case you're feeling a little more naughty with your writing, find it here. http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessAJAfterDark please upload any like it to a pastebin so they can be added out of thread.
And above all else, enjoy your stay at /paj/!
(Real) first for sexy hooves!
>>27347739
Good job, bit of a rough start, but you were a fine standin.
>>27347779
Awww, well second for Applelion.
so that was completely fucked
but hey, I did something for the general! I've never done that before!
NC
>Potsticker
“56”
~~~
>No no no! You can’t eat udon like that, you have to-
“Hey, bosslady?”
>Do not interrupt me when I am speaking of culinary greatness!
“I was just wondering, you think we’re missing anything?”
>Obviously not, or someone would have gotten us!
“Isn’t the recroom hidden, though?”
>They’d find us if they were determined enough, now hole the sticks like this!
“…I don’t want to criticize, but holding chopsticks with a hoof seems dumb-“
>That’s what the tape is for, duh!
“But why don’t I just use holes in my legs?”
>…Cheap ass changelings.
>>27347943
>...Cheap ass changelings
HA
I don't know why this is NC
>>27347943
She is so fired.
I ran into this and I'd like to request this as the next thread OP.
https://derpibooru.org/1029608?scope=scpe70f4571887cc2ae789de738e2553f54b81d3c02f
>>27348009
Her ass would literally be grass.
Lulu does it old school.
>Idris
“Cheese’
~~~
>Oh, blast! It looks like the way up to Canterlot is blocked again, it looks like I’ll be waiting longer still.
“Can’t you just fly-“
>I’m so worried, but I suppose it’s a bit silly, since my wife clearly has a GIANT FUCKING TRANSFORMING AIRSHIP SHE CAN USE! DIDN’T TELL ME, BUT HEY! THAT JUST MAKES THE SURPRISE ALL THE MORE FUN! LOOK AT MY SURPRISE FACE! ISN’T IT A DARLING OF SURPRISE!? I MUST LOOK LIKE A CHILD ON GIFT DAY!
“Ah. This makes things clearer.”
>SO GLAD I DIDN’T GET ONE OF THOSE! I JUST WOULDN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH IT!
“Loud.”
>AND ALL THOSE COOL FEATURES WOULD JUST OVERLOAD MY POOR MIND! WHY, I WOULDN’T BE ABLE TO HANDLE IT! THANK YOU HONEY FOR SAVING ME FROM HAVING TO DO THAT!
“So, I guess getting a lift up there is out of the question?”
>GAHHHHAHAHHHHHH!
“...At least I’m seen again…”
>>27348213
>>27348213
Holy shit they're alive!
OOCO/NC/Whatevs
>Twilight
"AJ"
'???'
"Hey Twi, got yer hayburgers here."
>Hm? Oh thanks, Applejack, just set them on the desk there. Wait, why are you running food around?
"Eh, Ah was gettin' mahself a slice of Apple Cider Cake and the cooks asked me to run them down to ya. They uh...they're a bit leery of ya since that business with the-"
>My Frybot 9000 only achieved sentience ONCE, those guys can hold such a grudge.
"Riiiight, now ah don't wanna pry, Twi, but what exactly are ya doin' on yer console there?"
>Hm? Oh I was running a diagnostic on my system-it's been a bit sluggish lately-and stumbled across an old project of mine.
"What kinda project? Like Harmony Prime?"
>Huh? Oh no no, nothing big as that just a...comprehensive geopolitical simulation of politics, technology, and war.
"...just that, huh?"
>Yes. I left it incomplete, sometime after Chitania's rampage and before my little...episode.
"An' it's been running this whole time?"
>Yep, it's simulated about-let me check here-five thousand years of Equestrian history starting from you bringing the changelings into the ballroom.
"That right, so how's the world look then?"
>Uhm...
"Well?"
>I'll just show you...*Spoiler Pic Here*
"..."
>I may have oversimplified certain personalities when I was initially coding the AI.
"..."
>Before you ask, the thing that made Equestria an arid burnt out hellhole was not a race war.
"Well that's good to know-"
>It was over the last slice of cake in the world.
"..."
>I never said I perfected this.
"YA MANIACS, YA BLEW IT UP! YA BLEW IT ALL UP! DAMN YA! DAMN YA ALL TA HELL!
'YOU CAN PROVE NOTHING, MAREVELOUS!'
>"..."
'...I'm telling Shiny you cursed. AHAHAHAHAHA!'
>>27348453
It begins!
>>27347806
Gold Star.
>>27348453
>the Maney bit at the end
Brilliant,
>>27348453
Little shit like that is why I am happy we nixed the 'make her self aware' plot.
>>27348591
I always liked the 'make PD more comic book' too.
Just fits to go more silly, not less.
>>27348453
"Twi, Ah cain't help but notice there's lights on that planet."
>Yes, actually, the place is still quite inhabited.
"So Ah guess ponies survived the Cakepocalypse?"
>Define ponies.
"...aw Faust damn it, are you about to tell me-?"*Spoiler Pic 2: Electric Boogaloo*
>Nice to see Rekulk's family doing well for themselves.
"HOW!?"
>My guess is them all living underground spared them from what was going on topside. From what I've been able to piece together in the interim years, they managed to come up from underground and develop their own society.
"...Welp the meek shall inherit, ah guess. Don't explain how'n the high hell they managed to cover the entire planet with big glowing cities, though."
>You think that's crazy, wait 'til you see the spaceships.
"THE WHAT?!"
>>27348591
Y'know I once had an idea for a gag with herduring Nightmare Night, someone dresses up as a character from a rival comic company and she literally couldn't see them.
>>27348766
>Aj quoting the bible
It fits, but it's so weird.
>>27348925
Do they even have a bible of any sort?
Where else could they get that quote from?
>>27348940
>Hi. My name is Sunset Shimmer, Christianity was one of the things I've told some ponies about. And no, not in the meme way. Now if they didn't listen to me, Twilight spent a good deal of time between AJ's ascension and my arrival grabbing shit from the human world for shits and giggles or to advance pony tech.
>>27349024
>Christianity
>Advancement
DO YOU EVEN DARK AGES SON!?
>>27349065
OR not AND
I'm aware of religion and science not being friends, I'm also aware that the Church of Faust could be a thing. But I do know that Shimmer reference Christianity more than once
>Cloudchaser
“Derpy”
~~~~~
>Is that cloud on fire?
“Yes. Yes it is.”
>…
“…”
>This is the part where you say you don’t know what went wrong.
“But I do know why it’s happening!”
>Okay… why?
“Because it’s a gas cloud!”
>…I’ve got nothing.
>>27349106
There was even a discussion from her on why so many ponies said 'hell'
>>27349315
tartarus takes up more space, is not in OUR vernacular, and since it is a visit-able place, not a hell equivalent to ponies.
>>27349337
We know why WE say it, we just poke fun at ourselves.
>>27349252
...didn't see that coming.
>>27347570
>Seeing an OP you didn't make
It's giving me Scruffening flashbacks.
>>27349648
Wait, besides this and the thread used as a bunker, when was the last time you didn't make the thread.
>>27349687
Uhhhhh... shit, I'm honestly trying to remember.
Thread 100, because the OG phrase poster guy wanted to do it?
Right, I did forget something.
Pinkie Preview Prophecies
>While Applejack investigates, Rarity airhoofs on reflex!
>Fluttershy finds her chickens stripping!
>Berry Punch is really creative with her bottles.
>Octavia rocks on with a flamethrower cello and rides on Vinyl's speakers.
>Flitter also works on her glutes.
>Pennydrop is suddenly distrustful of Gwen when she mentions she's not big on coffee.
>Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon didn't even notice the CMC was gone, but oddly enough they congratulate them.
>and of course puppet fanservice!
>>27348786
NC
>AHHHHAHAHA! Myyyy, what a STRANGE Superhero you are!... Battlemare? Huh, I've never heard of... what's that rumbling noise?...Why are there a bunch of lawyers coming towards me?... I DON'T UNDERSTANNNNNDDDDD!
>>27350077
>Pennydrop just knows.
>>27348057
I'm not sure if that's brilliant or terrible foreshadowing.
>>27347779
WINNAR
>>27350429
>Now, Equestria shall be mine!
"ALL YOURS!"
CHUCK!
RUN!
>...Shoot, wait. Think Ah' got screwed on this one.
>>27350750
It's like if scar had inherited The Pride lands in reverse.
Ahhhh, new thread smell. Gooya love it.
>>27351108
Mhmm yeah
>>27351108
Speaking of,they forgot to say goodnight
How rude.
>>27352298
I'm too busy making MOAR! locks to say goodnight. I have to say my first attempt since forever gave me an slightly ugly yet strangely charming one. It was a prelim for the a Spacelocks but yeah, its going gooda.
>>27347943
Oh Mourning Star... you goof, you.
>>27352684
I love that terrible name
>>27352319
Yes, need space cave ponenuts
>>27350847
>Everything the light touches is your kingdom... And it's pretty much all fucked.
So much regret... So much that I'm considering a redo. I feel that I have too now. Hmm... maybe if I mash the two together.
>>27354177
Nice ambiguity, faggot
>>27354271
It is more than likely Schmoe, who likes to be vague when they tell us they're working on something.
>>27354317
Correctamundo! Ever since I saw the 'Chitty' pic at the end of last thread I feel like I should have made the new armor look more like that. I really wanna, all the sketches I've done since give me goosebumps!
>>27354271
Nice asshat, ya bundle.
>Lucky
“QS”
‘SG’
~~~
>Sweep, soldiers, sweep! Sweep like you mean it!
“We’re sweeping, we’re sweeping.”
‘Canterlot’s finest, relegated to cleaning up rubble, everyone.’
>Silence, solider! Two things! One, this is the scene of the crime, you are collecting evidence now that the investigators have done a thorough sweep! We’re going to find answers here if it kills us! And Two!... Canterlot’s finest? Really? We’re not even in the B class. I’m pretty sure that damn filly with the rocket launcher isn’t A class anymore.
‘Hurtful!’
“What information are we going to find in restaurant wreckage anyway?”
>That’s for the braintrust to figure out!
‘AKA, we have no idea.’
>If that’s not enough for you, remember! This is for the safety of the citizens as well! It’s about making sure nobody steps on a broken piece of wood, or cuts themselves on dirty glass, or inhales toxic fumes, or a metal chunk falls on them, or-
CRUMBLE!
“AHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhh….”
>…Or falls through a hole in the floor of the city itself. See? Safety!
‘…’
>Wait.
>”OH SHIT!’
>AJ
>Fuck all y'all Ah was the best ghost outta the lot of 'em
>>27355461
>inb4 this is the last time we ever see him
>>27355472
I actually agree.
>>27356246
You just say that because she was the cutest.
>>27355472
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"AJ"
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but it's time to warm the hearts with spirits! Now for our main guest....APPLEJACK!!!
"Howdy"
>So you think you were the best hearth's warming spirit eh?
"Of course. Ah' had the best song obviously. Ah'm not big on fancy outfits or anything, but Ah' was just the best dressed out of us all."
>But I had the best tap dancing routine and the best message! Hearth's Warming is about being with your friends...and we're friends forEVER Ever Ever.
"Yeah, but Ah'-"
>Ever ever ever.
"Okay, stop."
>Ever...ever...ever.
"Is there an off switch on you or-"
AJ wakes up and finds Luna whispering in her ear.
'Ever...ever...ever'
"...why are you doing that?"
'Pinkie asked us to for some reason. We must sleep now, so have a nice day, Applejack. '
Luna walks out.
>...Ah' bet she's just bitter she had to essentially play Death.
>>27357169
You'd be bitter too!
OOCO
>SA
“Chrysalis”
‘Cadence’
~Celestia~
(18)
{42}
-Spitfire-
~~~~
>So, what movie are we watching today, Eighteen?
(Oh, you’ll love this! It’s the story of a stallion who is torn between choosing two mares, and who he should be with. It has a very happy ending, so I’ve heard.)
~Subtle!~
(My choice, my movie!)
{Even I’m more subtle than this.}
-Oh yeah, we could hardly tell you want to get plowed by Shining with your face buried in Cadence at this moment.-
{See?...wait…}
~And three, two…~
{NGH!}
“Time of death, fuck o’ clock.”
(Stop interrupting my movie by making my best friend fizzle out!)
“I agree, let us join together and see the wonderful benefits of a shared relationship.”
‘This isn’t really equivalent, though.’
~Why’s that?~
‘Cause this is my Shiny, he’s not torn between me and another mare. I won that race already, and I’ve been up on that podium so long my legs hurt.’
>She’s right you know. I am, in fact, her Shiny.
-BOOM!-
(Just watch the freaking movie! I want to see some threesome action-)
~~~~
>…
“…”
‘…’
~…~
{…}
(…I did not expect this outcome.)
-At least it was a nice boat.-
>>27357436
ah dun get it
>>27357436
Damn, haven't seen that refernce in forever!
>>27357169
Side note, my 4 horseman thing is starting to sound more plausible.
>>27357436
If it's referencing what I think it is, then I had a good chuckle.
I'd like to believe that Cadence is the Kotonoha of the group. It really was a nice boat though.
>CloudChaser
“Derpy”
‘Lyra’
~~~~
>LYRA! How’s that magical storm coming?
“And can you make it a little darker than normal? We want it to pop.”
‘It’s… coming? What do you think?’
>Er, not to knock your creativity or anything, but that looks like pillow fluff you painted black.
‘I’m glad my art is recognizable!’
“Good job!”
>No! Not good job! We wanted a magical storm!
‘Right, I’m making it, with the magic of art!’
>WE WANTED REAL MAGIC!
‘…To make a cloud?’
>YES!
‘Ohhh. I can’t do that, why did you think I could do that?’
>I thought you said you were from Canterlot! You were friends with Twilight Sparkle!
“You’ve got credentials!”
‘What the heck makes you think that being from Canterlot means I’m good at magic?’
>Because you’re a unicorn!
‘RACIST!’
“That technically is racist, but sub-racist, cause we’re all ponies.”
‘Shut up, miss GRE!Y!’
“….You shut your dirty mint colored mouth.”
‘HOW DARE YOU! At least I’m not a horse buzzard!’
>Better than a dickhead!
‘RACIST!’
>…
‘I… I think!’
>…
‘That’s it, I’m taking my cloud and I’m going home! HMM!’
STOMPSTOMPSTOMpstompstomp
>…You made poor hiring choices.
“I didn’t-“
>PERFECT RECORD!
>>27357978
Where this subplot came from, I have no idea.
But I love it.
>>27358225
Derpy is that good at sex.
>JJ
“Acty”
‘32’
~~~~
>This is stupid.
“I know, but I have to look like I’m trying.”
>You’re sitting on a tiny upturned box in the middle of rubble, filling out papers.
‘If it’s too small, you can have my seat.’
>But then were would you sit?
‘Me and him can share!’
>What? But then the seat your on would be too small.
“And how would you work?”
‘Well, clearly I’ll just sit in your lap.’
“…but then how would I work?”
‘Reach around, obviously. Come now, you’ve never done that with him?’
>Pffft, no, that’s stupid.
“Yeah, JJ just ducks down forwards. He goes pretty low, but we make it work.”
‘…You are doing this on purpose.’
>What?
‘FUCKING!’
“Ohhh, step on a nail, boss?”
>You know what? I’m not going to be snarky, I sympathize. I swear up a storm when I get stuck wrong like that.
“It’s true, he squeals. Makes me freeze up and panic.”
‘GAAHHHHHH!’
>Poor guy.
>>27358868
They fucking have to know.
>>27357468
School Days.
>>27359039
If you did, would you tell?
>>27359214
Wait....which one is which?
>PJ
“Haymaker”
‘Blueblood’
~~
>Feel my spuddy wrraaaaatthhhh!
‘MMF!’
“I tried to stop her, really.”
>Steal my chance at glory, will you!?
‘MMMFFF!’
>I could’ve been in the awesome team of awesomeness, but noooo! This was my in to the A-team, jackass! Could have totally finally joined!
“Wait, aren’t you A-team already?”
>What? No, I’m in the gunclub.
“Is that not the same thing?”
>Pffft, no! The A-team is a government funded team with a whole lot of cool toys, cool missions, and a license to kill!
“That does not sound like something we should be funding.”
>The Gunclub is a club… where we like weapons.
“Not guns?”
>Not guns specifically. In fact, only two of us use guns. Out of six.
‘Mmff?’
>Yeah, it’s a little biased. Also, we haven’t had an actual meeting in forever. So I don’t know if that’s still a thing.
“Huh. What a shame.”
>…Where was I?
“Shoving spuds in Blueblood’s mouth to punish him.”
>Oh, right!
‘HHMMGM!’
“She asked.”
‘HMMGGMGMMG!’
>>27359595
To be fair, the only funding is to spike.
>>27359595
The dumb meme kind of killed the club dead, huh?
>>27359839
More like DT gettin kicked off the A-team.
>>27359947
That was kinda the nexus of it, not helped by the fact a lot of anons had tar problem in the story of not being able to tell the difference. When that happened, it was post party land and 42 had pretty much stopped hanging out with the others, and 77 hasn't been relevant in a whole lotta threads.
Lots if factors..
>>27359839
It wasn't dumb, its just that when everyone decided lets not kill her but make her a good guy, I made sure to say something around the lines of...
"I'm just letting you guys know right now that, if you put Chitania in the gunclub, I'm jumping ship."
Cause that's what we had been doing with pretty much everyone... You have a weapon? Gunclub. You have a tendency for destruction? Gunclub. You sometimes morally ambiguous? Gunclub. YOU HAVE AN EDGE LIKE A RAAAAAAAZOR BLA~DE!? GUUUUUUNCLUB!!!
Everyone cringed and it made everyone one take a good haaaaaaard look at it. From there is just began to rapidly loose its appeal and begin to die.
It had to be said, it was done for the good of us all, I just never intended it to straight up kill it.
>>27359993
Spikes plummeted relevance certainly didn't help.
>>27359839
I still carry a grudge against the guy who made a fuss and created that meme.
>>27359947
Also I'm still angry at both AJ and the writer for doing that. I was using DT in partyland to keep the A-team together or at the very least plant seeds for more adventures with them. Having DT removed was one of the biggest toe steps I had in the thread.
>>27360144
Is this the guy you're talking about >>27360050 cause that actually seems like a legitimate reason to cause a fuss.
>Cloudchaser
“Derpy”
‘???’
~~~
>Alright, back to working! Me and you are going to get into it, and we’re going to get into it hard! GLUTE BRUTE!
“…”
>It’s hard to rhyme words with Glute that mean exploding.
“Shoot the glute?”
>You shut your filthy mouth. If I hear that from you again, I will shove a Faustdamned rabid raccoon down your throat and watch you choke to death on the disease ridden animal clawing out your organs.”
“Okay… Why are we working our glutes anyway.”
‘BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT A CHAMPION DOES!’
>GASP! YOU!
‘That’s right! Surprised to see me here… SISTER!?’
>GAAASSPP!
“…Why are you looking at me?”
‘Are you actually looking at me?’
“Yeah, why?”
‘…I’ve got nothing. But yes, strange mare, I AM HER SISTER!’
>GASSSPPPP!
“Is… is that… I don’t… what am I supposed to say to that? What’s the reaction you are looking for?”
>What do you want, sister!?
‘What do I want? I simply want… to BE THE GREATEST WEATHER CAPTAIN EVER!’
>GASP!
‘Cloudsdale, specificall!’
>Oh… good luck with that!
‘Thanks! Want to work out together?’
>Do I!?
‘You want to come, strange grey mare?’
“…Sure!”
‘Lets see you… work those gluetes.’
“…”
‘Slowly.’
“…I like meeting new ponies.”
Anon from >>27360144
>>27360050
Why you little green dick, a simple let's not put Chitania in the gunclub because it's crowded already would have surfice not a full blown meme that gets brought up even today!
>>27360050
I think it's an exaggeration that it made us cringe or something, but it might have been one of the many factors, sure.
>>27360251
Oh sod off will you
We've got enough wanton destruction in this thread enough as is without making an exclusive club out of it
Let the gun club meme fucking die
>>27360336
Not him, but the GC meme's been dead for a minute, like the real GC. So I reckon we can bring it back to it's standard level of use.
>>27360336
You should totally write a gun club story to spite that guy.
Or a lot of gc stories.
Do it, let the anger flow through your fingers!
>>27360415
No he's the one who wants it to die because 'Fuck you, write what *I* want'.
>Fluttershy
“???”
~~
>Oh… oh dear…
Every second she spent looking out over the wreckage was a second her heart was breaking.
>What happened around here?
“Oh, gashtly thing, that crazy changeling has gone and done it again! Can always count on her for a bit of chaos, no?”
She spun, face pointed squarely towards the reverse pop sounding noise that had signaled his arrival.
Discord had made his entrance, and every second he spent stuffing popcorn into his bag was filled with smiles.
>Who did this?
“Wasn’t I clear? Chitania dear, Chitania.”
>What?... Why?
“To get out of a bet, most likely.”
>What!?
“Kidding! Just kidding, of course.”
She bopped him on the head, his lanky flight wavering for just a second in the aftermath.
>This is serious, Discord!
“Actually? Not really. Sure, it looks quite unsettling to you normal ponies, but it’s not like there were any deaths or anything, because we can’t have that without going full teenage poetry.”
>What!?
“You know what I mean. There were no fatalities… just one changeling out on the run, and under my radar. Oh ho, there will be words when I figure out how she did this.”
The words became dangerous, but Fluttershy couldn’t pay attention to any of them.
>Everyone’s okay?
“…well, I say okay, but-“
Time and space folded in on itself, and she was gone.
“Oh fine, it’s not like I wanted to talk anyway. I have my own things to do, after all…”
>>27360168
This got weird fast.
>>27360859
/pa/ in a nutshell.
>>27360336
Fuck you, /pa/l. Gun club fun was one of the things that kept me going and one of the things that kept me writing for Spike and making him relevant. The gun club deserves to live no matter what you say!
>>27360415
You know what? Yeah, I'll cave into my anger for this.
OoCO
>Spike
"DT"
'SilverS'
[PJ]
~~~~
Spike walks into the club room and sees DT, PJ, and Silver Spoon drinking soda.
>Oh the sodas got restocked?
"Yeah, want to join us?"
>Sure.
Spike lines up and opens a can. He takes a good sip.
>Ahh...yep.
"Yup."
'Eeeyup.'
[Mmmhmm.]
"Do you think my bullet sculpture made of bullets could sell high at an art sale?"
[Mrmamgmph? Mrmamphm.]
'Yeah, I thought you liked that thing.'
"I do, but do you think it'd be artsy enough that someone would buy it?"
>I'm going to be blunt, DT. It's a bunch a bullets glued together. I don't think it's going to be considered art.
"You just don't understand my art, Spike! It deserves to be praised as the high quality art that it is!"
'If you ran out of bullets, would you end up gutting it for more?'
"Run...out...of bullets?...I don't understand what you're talking about."
>Charity has magic bullets if she runs out of physical bullets.
[Mrmmrmemph.]
"No one wants to hear about your bulletless swords, PJ. Besides, I glued it together pretty well. It's going to last a hundred years."
DT gives it a few taps and it falls apart.
"...*GAAAASP*"
'...we should leave.'
>Why?
'She now has 25,000 bullets in front of her.'
[Mrghng.]
>Okay point taken.
~Next Day~
Spike reads a newspaper that mentions shots fired at an art gallery. He shakes his head.
>She definitely has the artist anguish.
>>27361056
Nice.
>muffled PJ
Forgot how much I liked her that way, too.
OoCO
>42
"77"
'DT'
[PJ]
~~~~
>Yes...yeeees...YES!
"...what are you doing with Spike's balls?"
>It wasn't easy, but I can now roll Spike's baoding balls in my hooves.
"What? You're kidding me."
>Believe it.
42 rolls Spike's balls in her hoof.
>Spike's balls are practically putty in my hooves.
[Mrmmrm?]
'Yeah, what are you talking about?'
>I'm playing with Spike's blue balls of steel.
'Oh, the Baoding balls from the rescue. I forgot about those. Does his balls feel good?'
>Spike has a great pair of balls and I just loving fondling them.
Snickers all around.
"She practically mastered Spike's balls."
'Do want to rub his balls sometimes?'
>I've been rubbing his balls together for a while now. I hope I don't wear his balls out.
[Mrmamphmm? Mmph mmph mhmmph.]
"Oh wow, really PJ?"
'Geez, you ruined the joke.'
>and we were on a roll too. Way to be a buzzkill, PJ.
"That was completely inappropriate."
42, 77, and DT shake their heads and walk away.
[*gulps*...but I thought it was funny! W-wait!]
>>27361314
>read about halfway
>start laughing like a retard
Holy shit I forgot allllll about Spike's balls!
OoCO
>77
"42"
'DT'
[Spike]
~~~~
The gun club members stand in a line drinking soda.
>Yup
"Yurp"
'Eeeyup.'
[Mmhmm.]
>I can't believe I'm going to be a married. I didn't think I'd settle down.
"That reminds me. Have you decided who was going to plan your bachelor's party?"
>No, why? Did you want to plan it?
"If you're offering. Yeah, I think I would be the mare to plan your bachelor party."
>...Hmmm.
~~~~~~
"And you get a punch! And you get a punch! AND YOU GET A SPECIAL PUNCH! PUNCHES FOR EVERYPONY!"
~~~~~~
>...yeah no.
"That is a gross exaggeration and it wouldn't end up that way...most of the time."
'Clearly, I'm the one who should plan his bachelor's party.'
>....
~~~~~~~
'And you get a rocket! And you get a rocket! AND YOU GET A SPECIAL ROCKET! ROCKETS FOR EVERYPONY!'
~~~~~~~
>...I don't think so, poppet.
'Hey, I think your party deserves a bang. Giving everypony a rocket would result in fun for everypony.'
>...you didn't even try to deny it.
[What about me? I planned Shining Armor's Bachelor party. I've got the experience.]
>...hmmm.
~~~~~~
[You rolled a 15. The stripper gives you a smile when you spanked her. She starts to rubs herself over your crotch.]
~~~~~~
>...Eh lesser of 3 evils. Congratulations, Spike. You're my bachelor party planner.
[WOOHOO!]
"WHAT!?!"
'GENDER BIAS!'
"Completely sexist."
>Do you want to be invited to my wedding or not?
"'...retracted.'"
>>27361561
>Spike is an ERPer
oh god
what have we done to him
>>27361561
Spot on 42.
>>27361561
I'd've gone with Spike, too. ERP-themed wedding, hell yeah.
>Daw
>Oi, what about me?
"What about you?"
>...point.
>Honeyheart
“Jetset”
‘???’
~~~
>Honestly, Jetters? When you popped up outta nowhere like that, all secret agent-ish and whatnot, gotta say, was not expecting this.
‘Pass the butter, Jetset?’
“Delighted to.”
>This? Totally did not expect it.
“Some for you too, Honey?”
>You bet your cute rear-end I- wait... di-did you juh-just call me-
“Sorry, did I offend? Forgive me for shortening your name without asking permission first.”
>NO! No, no, it’s… it’s fine! Totally fine, actually! I’ll be your Honey, I don’t mind….
‘I agree with ya, Double-H. I thought your boycolt here was gonna punch my head off or… or whatever it is agents do.’
“Such senseless brutality. If anything, I’d have simply teleported you into the clouds and let you drop. Effortless, no blood on my hooves.”
>…
‘…’
“But no, this lunch is to show my appreciation, for keeping Honey here safe.”
>Ha, lunch, he says… rentin' out all of Horte’s Café like it ain’t nothin’. You know I used to dream about bein’ able to eat here? And now I am, bib and all…
‘Me too, sister. I mean, honestly speaking, I didn’t really do anything.'
“Well, it’s either reward you for keeping my nurse friend ‘safe’ or take you sky-diving sans the chute for your thigh remarks. I’m good with either but while you debate over your choices, my pasta primavera is getting cold.”
‘…Pass the shredded cheese?’
“A pleasure.”
>This has been a very weird, very enjoyable day thus far.
>>27361765
Awww...nobody wanted you in the Gun Club anyway.
>Chitty
“???”
~~~
“SQUEAK!”
>Don’t you yell at me, I was hungry.
“SQUEAK!”
>Yes, I was that desperate, I actually sapped the love from a duck.
“SQUEAK!”
>No regrets, you hear me? None. I have no regrets! I feed as I wish, I take as I wish! I am.. wait, do ducks squeak?
“SQUEAK!”
>…I’m talking to a rubber ducky, aren’t I?
“SQUEAK!”
>Which means I drained love from a rubber duck… or thought I did …
“SQUEAK!”
>I might be in trouble.
>>27361817
>>This has been a very weird, very enjoyable day thus far.
Awww, she's a cutie.
Like a less in your face Sweet Note.
>>27361561
See, that's how you should react when people say they don't like a thing.
Do the thing, but funny.
>>27362172
>She's gone full bonkers
Yes.
>>27362631
Hunger hallucinations, poor Buggy McGodkiller
>Chitania
"???"
~~~
>...Oh dear Hivemind! I know when it all went wrong!
"What did you do, chiiiitttyyyy?"
>It's so obvious! I know exactly what I should have done instead!
"What was thaaat?"
>I SHOULD HAVE EATEN CHINEIGHES INSTEAD!
"...That seems duuumb."
>Shut up, you're just me with a slowed down voice!
"So then you know it's duuuumb."
>...I might have gotten in over my head with this one.
>>27362915
That's what you get for being a Chigger.
Stop it.
You can stop it.
Literally, just stop being it. You are literally the only species who can do that.
The post above mine is a Chigger, don't trust him.
>>27361561
>[What about me? I planned Shining Armor's Bachelor party. I've got the experience.]
NC
~SA~
~~~~
~Wait, you what!?~
[Totally planned it.]
~But... I never got a bachelor party!~
[I never said it happened, just that I planned to do it.]
~...~
[Oh, fine. Go marry one of the other mares and I'll plan that one.]
~How offensive! Like I would marry someone just for-~
[It will involve OnO.]
~...EIGHTEEN! COME HERE~
>>27363611
He'd do it too. You know he would.
Trixie is best pony. She can even out banjo Applejack.
>>27348766
"Alright, now Ah admit, Ah ain't as scientifically minded as ya, Twi, but how the heck did the Morlocks get ta bein' doggone space aliens? They don't even look the same anymore, and ta top it all off they're prancin' around in the daylight when last time Ah checked they melted inta some kinda goo if so much as the morning sun touched their skin."
>Well I mean, artifacts of our civilization were probably left from the-wow, the system even called it the 'Cake War', that's thorough. But yes, they could have built off what we left behind and a combination of evolution/adaptation with a sprinkling of magic runoff from literally every single nigh on godly powerful being unleashing spells on the planet and well...you get two-legged space pony mutants.
In the distance a cry can be heard.
'Fucking furriiieeeeeesssss!'
"...did ya'll just hear Sunset?"
>No, why?
"So okay, they got these three ships here and that phallic symbol in the background, anything else ya wanna blow my mind with?"
>Well actually there's six ships. These are just the military vessels according to my readouts, they also have two ships for exploration and another for exploiting planetary resources.
"Ah just...Ah don't...get it. I mean the Morlocks're good folk from the three or so Ah've met personally but nothin' about 'em ever struck me as capable of building a grain silo, let alone a space empire."
>Well...would you like to get the story from the horse's mouth, so to speak?
"Do what now?"
Twilight nods towards the simulator.
>I can load up the program in the simulator there, we can talk to any one of them we'd like.
"Hmm...fine then. Fire up the Danger Room-"
>Grrr...
"Still don't like that name, huh? Ok, the Subspace Thingamajigger."
>Thank you.
>>27364294
>'Fucking furriiieeeeeesssss!'
>"...did ya'll just hear Sunset?"
>>No, why?
It must be done now... I must have Sunset the Red.
>>27364294
Bwoop!
Our two heroes find themselves standing in a sprawling garden, surrounded by strange plants. Some bear fruit, others are flowers, yet all seem a far cry from the kind they're used to...
>Huh.
"Didn't expect this."
>Neither did I.
"Dry rocky hellscape...nice little garden. Y'know this is nice, Ah think Ah can-no. Way."
>Huh?
Applejack glares behind Twilight's shoulder. Twi follows her gaze over to where a very large fruit is hanging from a tree. A familiar kind of fruit.
"Ha! Well don't that just beat all?"
>Sure does, Chrysalis.
"Huh? Aw shush it. Right here is a genuine apple, after the weird ass cakepocalypse! Apple's're survivors, a hardy fruit! Ah think ah'll have me a taste..."
>Applejack, are you sure that's a good idea-?
Buck!
Plop.
Chomp!
"EUGH!"
>...what's uh...what's the matter.
"This don't taste like an apple at all!"
>Oh no, Applejack, what's it taste like?
"A doggone raspberry!"
>...seriously?
Ka-chuck!
"Ya dead ta me, false-apple!"
Bonk!
'Oof!'
>...
"...uh oh."
The two ponies peer behind the tree AJ had callously thrown the vila Raspapple past to find one of the peculiar Morlocks on the ground, rubbing his head.
'What a peculiarity, for such a suddenness of strikes...'
The Morlock inspects the fruit that hit him.
'Oho and aha, little tart, is this punishment? Did I prove too lazy of harvesting? Or did you just have an impatience for being food? Ho ho, I have no blame for you, a fruit so delicious, you could wait no longer to be tasted!'
"...well the talkin' didn't get no better."
'But hm, already you've been bitten from. Has a nest of Flutterbugs encroached on my garden again?'
>Uhm, no, I'm afraid that was my friend here.
The Morlock stands up, inspecting where the voice came from.
'Truly? Then come out, if you regret, I shall bring you no harm. All are welcome, for this bounty is the bounty of all.'
"Well iffin' ya insist."
'...'
>...hi.
Night thread...
>>27364556
She is either in heaven or hell.
>>27364905
You mean good morning!
>>27363751
In time, it will happen. Just wait, in time
>10
{BBB}
~~~~
>Annnd, done. Published!
{BZZT! Friend 10, is it wise to include that one subarticle?}
>What, you mean where the princess had to choose between saving the airship and her subjects?
{AFFIRMATIVE.}
>Now, why would there be a problem there? It's not like the princesses would blow up a changeling or anything.
{...BZZT.}
>Gotta do it, BBB. You know what I said, like it is, not how they want it to be. I'm not holding back ever again.
{...BZZT. Very well. Inquiry, would friend 10 be honest with this unit if the situation involved us?}
>Of course!
{Good. Then for the record, I will only ever try to cut off a pony's head in the event of Friend 10 in mortal danger.}
>...She can use lasers, BBB.
{So can this unit!}
>She'd totally beat ya'.
{Analyzing... analyzing... affirmative.}
>...
{Statement unchanged.}
>Heh... yeah, love you too, big guy.
{The sentiment is shared bug girl.}
>Ha ha! Clever! I like that... so, ready to make some more enemies?
{BZZT!}
>That's what I love to hear.
>>27364556
Just gonna ask real quick, anything need to be changed with the SpaceLock speech pattern here? I didn't want them to just speak normally but at the same time I didn't think they'd be full caveman still so I kind of settled on this weird sort of verbose meandering speech.
>>27367065
They seem fine to me. Little weird, but unique.
>>27367065
It takes some getting used to, but it does make them seem more alien.
I'd say stick with it.
Reminder that it has been almost 9 months since the pastebin has been updated on this frankly amazing collaboration.
So /pa/ls of mine a few threads ago I asked for some critique on my 'Anthropomorphic' Ponies, cause I think I have one that isn't too FUCKING FURRRRRY!, and I was wondering if you'd take another look and comment. I'm hoping a few of you will be able to help again.http://i.imgur.com/NSawitk.png
Also, now that that's out of the way... Lets talk Lock! Moar Locks! I'm wondering what sort of improvements I could make now that they've learned a bunch. I remember the first prototype I made and he was all ugh and ly plus an overall dirty creature. I'm thinking I could make them look more... clean at least, no more of those matted down greasy locks and something more akin to alpaca floof.
Whatcha think?
>>27367392
Really liking this model a lot more. It's more cartoony, less furry. It's got a bit of weight to it so it doesn't look 'sleek', but not chubby either.
Only slight critique is maayybe a little less of the popeye arms, but on the whole it's a vast improvement.
>>27367392
On the anthro, I'm not sure what I can add, the style seems pretty down pat. Pretty much just a bipedal version of the show models, which is what you're going for, so I think you've got it pretty close to on lock.
Onto the morlocks, though, I'm kinda in disagreement, as them being clean takes away from it. They're supposed to be ugly, scary motherfuckers.
>>27367392
>I remember the first prototype I made and he was all ugh and ly plus an overall dirty creature. I'm thinking I could make them look more... clean at least, no more of those matted down greasy locks and something more akin to alpaca floof.
They are ugly though, that's why ponies scream like bitches everytime they see one. Vekir kinda works as her motif is being cute plus that, but for the most they're supposed to be creatures you find in a deep dark hole that look like they would eat you, because they probably would. The twist is that even though they're fuck ugly, scary and horrifying, they just wanna live a normal life like everyone else, the area they do it in just makes their perceptions different than normal.
>>27367392
Anthro pony looks okay(Like how you flipped Rarity's hair depending on where you look at her like the show keeps doing), arms aren't really that "Popeyeish" since you're doing that thing where they can turn into hooves, I assume, so on the whole it looks okay. Keeps the show style but is it's own thing.
What kind of gun, is that, though?
On the Locks who have the More, I think if anything you need to make the not-Vekir ones like Rekulk look MORE monstrous and terrifying, except have them be all smiles and nice faces.
Or maybe do a "Before-After" pic of what it looks like after they get cleaned up, that would be cool too.
>>27367567
Methinks that's a Luger.
>AJ
"Rarity"
~~~~
>WHAT DID YOU DOOOOO!?
The interim spent of the alabaster pony trying to find the strength to actually speak had not been silent.
Rarity found she couldn't even quite place how she had come awake, or what had caused it. Every cell in her body said she should be resting right now, dead to the world in the wonderful dreamland she had been in, but instead she found herself forced the same into the great wide world, and she could barely stand it.
>RARITY!
The red faced pony yelling at her did not help.
>Talk, dangit!
When she found she could actually breath steady enough to do just that, her head could no longer keep itself pointed to the ceiling. It rolled, pointing her gaze towards the window that let light bleed in from the world outside. Through that tiny piece of glass that separated her room and the city beyond, she could see everything.
When she could finally speak, it was not an answer that came.
Instead, a question.
"...How many died?"
The fire that had been raging and threatening to consume her friend was all but quenched when she saw the regret on her friend's face. The remorse, alone, was enough to bring her pause, and pull her away from her friends face, into a slow sit.
>Gad dang... nobody buckin' died, okay?
The single eye that could actually see her looked inquisitive, if not downright unbelieving.
>They didn't. Celestia said she made sure to shoot her with... look, Dash got everyone clear, and... Nobody died. Worst case was you and Dash, from that fight at least.
She was relieved, there was no way she could be anything else. She felt that, but she remained uneasy as she looked out the window, and all the devastation that had been wrought in the time she had been unconscious.
>Rarity... what did you do?
"...I tried to help, again."
That, as simple as it was, seemed to be all she could say.
>Rarity...
"I just... I wanted you to get a chance to talk to Sunset, that was all."
1/4
>>27367639
Of course, the orange princess chided to herself
Of course it would be because of her.
>Then why'd you go after Chitania?
"I didn't mean to... I didn't want to, she was just in the way. I was so focused on just accomplishing what I set out to do I... I never thought..."
She started to choke up, her words silenced with the closing of her throat.
>Rar... she thinks we're out to kill her now.
Her eyes clenched in regret, her head barely able to nod as she accepted what she had already feared.
"I didn't mean to. I was just trying to run, but- but I dug down too deep, it all just came out, and I couldn't stop it, I couldn't control it. I couldn't do anything... and someone almost..."
There was a familiar twitch in Applejack's hoof, a long since forgotten feeling of chitin cracking beneath it resurfacing with memories she would rather kept hidden.
>Ya' ain't the first one.
Gently, that hoof reached out, laying itself over top of the burned and damaged white one on the bed.
>Rarity, Ah' gotta tell the truth.
Sadly, she nodded, not so much as a hint of disagreement.
"I suppose it's only fair, they be allowed to hate me for my mistake this time.
>We're gonna get through this, okay? They ain't gonna hate you.
Her reassurances, however genuine, fell on deaf ears.
"...I always wanted to be a princess, Applejack. Since I was a little filly, all I ever dreamed about was being one, having all the pretty dresses and talking to all the important ponies and being rich and famous and oh so wonderful. It was all I ever wanted to be... and then, the very first time I ever have ponies rally behind me, the first time I ever got to really be a princess and they listened... I made things so much worse."
Her hoof shot up to her lips, covering them as if in shame.
"All I wanted to do was help. Be useful and fix something, for once. I couldn't even do that. I just wanted to fix one thing, for you. Maybe... I was never meant to be a princess, after all."
2/4
>>27367652
Her eyes clenched shut, even tighter.
"I can't even be a good friend, why did I ever think I deserved this power? Whenever I try to help someone... all I do is make it worse. Perhaps... it would be for the best if you called Celestia, and I simply... went back to how I'm supposed to be."
The wings on her back curled inward, as if trying to hide away. Feeling the desire of the one attached to them, to be rid of them.
>...Ah' know the feeling. Ya' go out, try to do the right thing, try to make everything better, but if it's stubbornness, pride or just plain stupidity, ya' just mess everything up, and someone nearly pays the price... maybe keeps on payin' that price.
The hoof on top of Rarity's own twitched again.
>But Rar... that don't mean you get to give up.
"I'll only-"
>Don't you give me that, "Ah'll only make it worse so Ah' not even gonna try" bullshit. Iffin' ya' broke somethin', ya' gotta fix it. If ya' can't fix it, then ya' gotta do what ya' can, and as much as ya' can, till ya' at least get close. Ya' messed up, yeah. That's the truth, honestly... but if you think you just get ta' roll over and quit because of it, ya' got another thing comin'.
That same hoof was pulled to her chest, and Rarity could no longer look away from Applejack's face.
>And if you think this is gonna change a dang thing, yer' wrong. Yer' mah friend, yer' always gonna be mah' friend, and no dang stupidity ya' get yer'self into is gonna change that. Only thing that'll ever change is how often Ah' gotta knock some sense inta' you.
The princess beneath her did not say a word, but the frown on her face lessened.
>If ya' wanna throw in the towel on this whole princess mess, Ah' don't blame ya', and Ah' won't think any less of ya'. But if ya' got wings and a horn, neither, or dang flippers fer' hooves, it ain't gonna change nothin'. Yer' mah friend, and we're gonna get through this. Together.
At last, the hoof left her own, and gently set it back down to the bed.
3/4
>>27367663
>Ya'll rest, fer now. You ain't in no condition to do anythin', yet. But when you are... we're gonna fix this, Rar. Ain't got a dang clue how we are, but we're going to fix this. You, me, the girls, all of us and more are gonna make things right... and we're not gonna stop bein' your friends. Just rest, get better... and then we're going to fix everything.
She did not leave, to the ex-unicorn's surprise. She simply faded away, as if she had ceased to be, and left her alone in the room. Alone, still not smiling...
But not frowning either.
"...as long as you're there... okay."
The wings didn't feel as heavy, anymore.
~~~
Two pairs of orange eyelids fluttered open, stinging just a bit as they adjusted to the light of the room once again. When they focused, they came to rest on her fellow alicorn on the bed. Still as the night, slowly breathing, with eyes shut in a state of peaceful rest.
She had not moved an inch, and Applejack would have it no other way. Just one look at the battered, bruised and pained looking form of one of her dearest friends on that bed had been enough to dissuade even the slightest of thoughts of mistreatment or harsh retaliation. Even the thought of waking her to a place where she could feel the brunt of those wounds had been one that brought her sickness to her stomach.
Thankfully, she didn't have to.
>Thanks, this was much easier on her.
The Queen Changeling standing over her barely gave a nod, the flames on her horn long since dissipating.
~So, what next?~
>Now?... Ah'm gonna find someone Ah' can scream at and not feel bad about it.
~...I get to watch.~
>Wouldn't have it any other way.
>>27367671
Welp. Pommel's fucked.
>>27367392
>Dat rarity
Nice outfit.
>>27367392
>and something more akin to alpaca floof.
Oh my god, that would be hilarious.
>>27367663
>>And if you think this is gonna change a dang thing, yer' wrong. Yer' mah friend, yer' always gonna be mah' friend, and no dang stupidity ya' get yer'self into is gonna change that. Only thing that'll ever change is how often Ah' gotta knock some sense inta' you.
PURE
APPLEJACK
>>27367883
Amen.
>>27367392
Rara's fine.
>I'm wondering what sort of improvements I could make now that they've learned a bunch.
Now as now in story, or now as now in space-age simulator?
Assuming first, too short time to remove ugly, that takes generations of selective breeding.
I could however see them start putting more attention to health, and coming from that, hygiene.
And by that I mean not running around caked in dirt and shit. You see those spikes of fur on Rekulk? Tangled and glued with filth. Were ever morlocks introduced to the spa? Those tufts of hair are nice characteristic, but would be great if taken good care of.Bonus points if you make Rarity do it when she gets better.
LAST THREAD RECAP, BRO TIER EDITION
>Filthy Rich gets a call from his wife and regrets that she started talking to DT again,
>Spike meets with Rarity, who is unconscious, and after a pep talk with said pony via telepathic Chartiy, he decides to be a protector again, and not be so down.
>Chrysalis starts banging her head on the wall. She doesn't know when she'll stop.
>Chitania gets the downsides of being unable to move.
>AJ learns about Sweet Note and isn't happy.
>We finally cut back to 007, where we find out not only what happened to him, but where Fluttershy's been! Turns out 007 had one of his animal thralls call her for help, and she swiftly defeated Flash and Fizzle. After some accidental torture to Fizzle due to her powers, they say they'll tell 'their boss' they were successful so they'll leave the scientist alone, and everyone leaves.
>Honeyheart, after being harassed a bit by a guy, calls for Jetset via the vial he gave her.
>Twilight and Pinkie are mad they missed everything.
>Rekulk wants to party.
>PD and Gwen were wearing sparkly hoof polish this whole time.
>The Canties wonder why they don't just move.
>55 has some thoughts about clones that go awry.
>Twilight feels like she's fallen behind in the tech wars.
>Chrysalis dumps 13 off with 42 and goes to get to the bottom of this, ordering her to punch anyone who tries to get close to her, Celestia included.
>13 and 42 decide to play Candyland.
>2 and Mane-Iac keep driving Spitfire nuts
>Cloudchaser orders Derpy to stretch the glutes. Many a story with the pair follow as CC tries to be the best Ponyville Weather Captain ever.
>Celestia goes back to her room, and the head of Dollestia asks how the meeting with Sunset went.
>Acty wonders if he's supposed to sit with 32 or not.
>Aj tells Pinkie she hasn't found anything and is ticked.
>The CMC debate getting a cutiecenera or even telling anyone, and decide to just wait for someone to notice they have cutie marks.
1/2justtwo
>>27368178
>Applejack is ready to give up, when out of nowhere Chrysalis arrives and says she needs to talk!
>Chrysalis is, surprsingly, blunt. She cuts right to the chase and tells AJ to be honest with her if this is some plot to kill Chitania, or if any of the others might think that, or if Rarity was trying to do that.
>AJ tells her no on all counts, and finally she hears the story from 13's perspective. Although she's weary of taking 13's word for it, She also learns that Chitania really does think they're out to murder her, and she did try to stop the fight back when it started.
>Eventually she puts everything together, and Chrysalis agrees they need to fix this.
>In a surprising show of friendship, Chrysalis opts not to stay out of the whole mess, and says she'll help AJ fix what happened, even if it seems impossible. Aj is likewise touched Chrysalis came to her first, and Chrysalis said she just needed some honesty.
>Even as bad as it seems, the two join up and get ready to find the whole truth and bring it to the world!
>Trixie is still being a dick as 29 and co head back to ponyville.
>Sunset flirts with just leaving Chitty behind like so many did to her, but decides she can't do it, and goes into an unnamed town in disguise.
>DT talks with 77 again, where we learn it was her that wanted her armor to be black, instead of pink, because it felt more right for a fighter.
>Poindexter ejects after 2 finds his 'books'
>Luna is still at the spa.
>Rarity was having such a nice dream... until the screaming started.
>"RAARRRIIITTYYYY!... WHAT DID YOU DO!?"
>Applejack is not happy.
If missed story tell me in a rush wanted this out but no time!
>>27368200
Damn, talk about abridged!
As always, thanks for the recap.
>>27367416
>>27367434
>>27367483
>>27367567
>>27367737
>>27367963
Thank you all very much, now as for the morelocks, well take a look at this, ugly but charming. Also ignore the clothes, I was messing around with some ideas and ended up in Elvis Territory somehow.
>>27368272
>I am to being the hunka hunka burning love now, yes? Yes.
>>27368272
Pffftahahah, he looks like a stock bully character in a high school drama.
I love it.
>>27367392
Personally, I'm not a big fan of the fingers. I'm too used to seeing hooves I guess. If you used powerpuff girl hands to hold things, I honestly wouldn't question it. Anyway, that's my input. Overall it's just fine.
In light of the recent and awesome GC stories, I was gonna write this one story where Spike, still feeling conflicted, went outside, loaded some sort of special bullet into Charity and fired it into the air where it'd act as a beacon of sorts that all the members would see, drop their stuff, and come running which would lead to a group agreement to always be together and stuff.
I'm obviously not gonna write it now in light of other stories but man I'd been sitting on that for a long ass time. Feels good to get it out in some way.
>>27368272
INTO THE WIKI IT GOES!
>>27368272
He seriously does look like a tough guy character, but the kind that turns out to be a nice guy with a heart of gold.
>>27368272
I don't know why I love this, but at some point, Rekulk is going to get a jacket.
It's going to happen.
>>27368326
While I'm all for the airsack/keneticfield/etc explanation for hooves being able to pick up shit, I can't in my right mind allow that for triggers though. Pushing buttons? Fine. Flicking switches? Doubly Fine. Pulling levers? Definitely! Squeezing a Trigger? Nope.
And I'm not a fan of the whole OP Unicorn Master race being the only ones who can mess with these kind of things. So, everyone gets fingers!... Except for Celestia, cause she's the only normal one left.
>Cloudchaser
"Derpy"
~~~
>I dare you to say this isn't a good thing!
"This seems bad, actually."
>Ha! You backed out of the dare, I win! As a result, you now have to take all the blame for this, loser!
"I have to take the blame for starting a giant fire to make black clouds?"
>Yep! All on you, Derpidoo.
"That's not my name."
>You may have your name back after you agree to my terms.
"...What was the plan here?"
>You know, at some point, I forgot all about it.
"Huh."
>Yep, that's how you get a perfect record, just do it.
"Do you have a record at all?"
>Per. Fec. Tion.
"...That fire is spreading."
>PONYVILLE WEATHER TEAM, ASSEMBLE!
"..."
>...
"..."
>...They're coming.
"...'
>Just you wait.
"..."
>Annny second now.
"Maybe you need to yell louder."
>I don't like overdoing things.
>>27364556
'Truly the delicious fruit hit me harder than I was thinking, for otherwise ghosts of ages muchly passed traipse through my garden.'
>Uh, well, in a sense.
"Howdy there, pal, sorry about smackin' ya with that little liar apple. Guess I shoulda looked where I was throwin'."
>We're just here because we were curious about how uh...well all this came to pass.
'What has come to pass? You must be speaking specifically for an understanding to be reach, phantom friend.'
"How'n the hay did a bunch of cave dwellin' nimrods manage to get into space?"
>AJ, I think we should be a bit more diplomatic.
"Twi, this feller's a farmer, Ah think he'd appreciate a bit of bluntness."
The Morlock grins wide.
'Hmm hmm, yes, if the ancient stories are to be understood...the Apple and the Star stand before me, yes?'
"Do what now?"
'She of Knowledge and She of Honesty, two of the goddesses of the beloved time of the fathers who came before even my father's father's father. I am thinking this is no mere head bonking...'
>You could say that, what exactly do you know of that time?
'Only legends that have passed down...'
~HURRAH!~
The Morlock looks over his shoulder, blinking at a rapidly approaching form in the distance. He looks back to Twi and AJ.
'For truth our history is long, longer than can be told to you here, perhaps another time?'
The two ponies look at each other.
>Sure, we'll come back.
"Got work ta do, pal?"
The Morlock smiles.
'Within a sense.'
>See you soon.
'Farewell!'
Bwoop.
'Such a strangeness...perhaps a sign?'
~CHIEFTAN! CHIEF REKULK!~
'Yes, friend, for what do you shout?'
~News from the frontier, the scientists of the surveying ship Laggasch have made discoveries!~*SPOILER PIC*
Rekulk XVI, High Chieftan of the Great Morlock Tribe looks up to the stars, a grin on his face.
'...truly a sign, very truly.'
>>27368591>inb4 someone says it's Chitania over there.
>>27368502
Then I suggest either modifying guns to accommodate hooves like
https://derpibooru.org/613528?scope=scpe2804219d63b23825e5206084621b05e31af2e044
Or metal fingers like in this post or even this picture here.
https://derpibooru.org/695919?scope=scpe2804219d63b23825e5206084621b05e31af2e044
Otherwise pure fingers look too anthro.
>>27368502
In a project I abandoned a long time ago I usually had different types of pony specialize in different sorts of weaponry.
Unicorns used the usual sort of gun, while Pegasi specialized in quick striking melee attacks and dropping explosives, and Earth ponies usually either went unarmed or manned stationary World War 1-esque crank gun emplacements.
>>27368601
>Implying Chitty didn't survive the end of all things and is just lying in wait.
>>27368652
Modifying guns is all well end good, but I'm not making hoof triggers.
>https://derpibooru.org/613528?scope=scpe2804219d63b23825e5206084621b05e31af2e044
These guns don't even have triggers and while I'm all for the kinetic field, but extending up the "wrist" so you can use the hoof as a trigger 'finger'? Come on, really?
>https://derpibooru.org/695919?scope=scpe2804219d63b23825e5206084621b05e31af2e044
While I admit those are pretty neat, they don't fit the tech level, these things looks surgically implanted and a possible cybernetic interface. The ponies have a psudo-WW2 tech level mixed in with some magi-tech, and before you say anything about using that, I rather not.
While I'm thankful for the suggestions, I'm probably not gonna change the fingers, just be happy I'm using three and a thumb as the norm.
>>27368679
I thought about this too, but I didn't want to specialize anything to much.
>SA
"Cadence"
~~~
>...
"This... probably isn't helping, is it?"
>...Do we have ninjas?
"Wh... what?"
>Do we have ninjas. The Empire, I mean. Do we have Ninjas? Ninjas we can send out and make stab ponies. With swords. Do we have those?
"I... I don't...."
>Look, you know what? If there's one thing that can come from this whole thing Chrysalis did, it's that I can be open about this. I need ninjas. Ninjas who can track certain individuals down and stab them. With swords.
"..."
>I am flexible on the swords, but not on them being stabbed.
"Well, I guess changelings are kind of ninjas? Blend in, can take on any disguise, black to mingle in the night..."
>...
"Shiny no."
>I didn't say it.
"Shinny."
>I'm allowed to think it as long as I don't say it.
"..."
>...That one carries around a gun anyway.
"SHINY!"
>I didn't say it!
>>27368981
You feed them, they owe you a political assassination or two.
>>27368812
Looks good enough for me to suspend my disbelief and kind of a knitty gritty detail to be hung up on, but if you don't like hoof triggers, that's fine.
You can also did what I did in story and make magic iron gauntlets that can protrude fingers. I once had DT beat Spike in a game of rock paper scissors with it. Just because its pseudo-WW2 tech doesn't mean you can't borrow metal hands from Full Metal Alchemist or Guts from Berserk.
>before you say anything about using that, I rather not.
Oh...well, I'll say it anyway.
>>27368272
Im feeling strong 'Grease' vibes here.
Weird, considering I've never watched 'Grease'.
>>27369210
Honestly one doesn't have to watch Grease to have seen Grease. It's influence is pretty much everywhere.
>>27368272
This is gonna sound odd, but that coat looks like a 70's superhero costume.
>>27369714
Captain Yesterday!!!
>>27369714
I was oddly thinking sci-fi pilot, but that may just be the pseudo LP we got going on.
>>27369826
That's sort of what I had in mind actually. But I know jack about present day fashion let alone future clothes
>Celestia
"???"
~~~
The sound that came from her was two parts groan of pain, three parts gargle of frustration, and six parts plain dissatisfaction of all things in this world.
There was also one part cake hunger, but that universal constant no longer qualified as worth mentioning.
All of that combined with the telltale tiredness one normally gains when doing battle with a ten story monster compounded into a conundrum of aches and pain that could be solved by only one action.
Climbing onto the bed, and face first into a pillow.
>...This did nothing.
When the aches and pains and headache and heartache joined forces in a cabal of darkness against her rest, the temptation to bring about the end of all creation by calling forth her grand sun to give her the hugs to end all hugs reared it's ugly head once more.
Many a time she had fought off that feeling, but like the most cheesy of reoccurring villains it just kept coming back after swearing vengeance.
The slight sound of the party beyond was of little comfort to her in this state. No happiness of her ponies could chase away the spike in her lower back or the tapping sensation on the side of her head. There was little to be done in times like this, except just to wait and hope it went away.
It hadn't worked yet, but there was a first time for everything.
She lied there as the minutes and soon hours ticked away, face digging deeper in an attempt to suffocate herself and bring about the peace of death in vain. With her head as far down as it was, she never even heard the creak of her door opening, nor the hoofsteps that crept up to the bed.
She noticed when the weight shifted ever so slightly, and her mind instantly jumped to the thought of assassins, there to dig a knife into her back and leave her bleeding out in the darkness to be discovered when her body had grown cold.
She wished them luck.
>Whatever you want, it cannot possible be worth having your intestines ripped oooouuhuuuhhh myyyyyy~
1/4
>>27370054
The ideas forming as to how she would kill whoever had chosen to disturb her already ineffective attempt to sooth her aches and make a bad day worse melted like butter beneath the warm and soft hooves rolling into her back. She felt the sharp stings chased away one by one, pushed right out of her body and out of her mind.
She had no idea who it was, but she was already seriously considering giving them the key to the national treasury and telling them they had twenty minutes.
When they hit a particular maligned spot and miraculously pushed it right back where it should have gone, she was ready to bump that up to an hour.
>Ohhhhh, yessss...
Questioning who it was or why became as meaningless as knowing how many stars there were in the sky. Useful information, most likely, but as far as she was concerned all she cared about was how much wonderful twinkling was going to cover her sight before the night was over.
"Yeah, I figured you needed this today."
She was wholly unsurprised at the voice, in no small part to the fact he could have been a three headed goat and she would still think he was sent from the plain of happiness and lollipops with the magic he was working on her back.
While she would someday later admit it was probably a good thing that it had been someone she knew who had walked into her room and started rubbing their hooves all over her back in her prone state, that was something future Celestia would have to deal with.
Present Celestia did not give a single care.
>Bubblehorse, you have no idea.
He did not challenge her on that, though she knew he could being one of the rare ponies who actually did run a kingdom that had been wrecked by a giant monster, and instead continued his ministrations to bring her pain down from all encompassing to a level that didn't make her wish genocide on all things.
Equestria had been saved a second time on this day, and they had no idea.
It would not be the last.
2/4
>>27370060
"Sorry for just barging in, but-"
>Ooohhh~ Shiny? With the magic you are doing right now, you can have me. I'm serious, go ahead and have me right here on this bed. So long as you keep going you can do whateeeeever~ you want to me. Barge in anywhere you want.
His laughter and hitting what was easily the worst spot, right under where her wings connected, put the dumbest smile on her face.
"Been a while since that drove me up a wall, Celly."
>Keep your hooves on my back and you can drive me up any wall you want.
He kept at it like a good soldier should without pausing. He dug in and got to work, and he would not stop until every single enemy that was causing her pain was hunted down and eliminated, even if they were just misaligned bones or the odd inflamed nerve in her own body.
Still protecting her after all this time.
>Ooooh~ I needed that.
When his hooves that were no doubt aching themselves left her back, she felt like a whole new mare, one that had been kneaded out of a giant dough of bruised bread to a wonderful treat.
"I figured you also needed one of these."
Speaking of treats, with her nose no longer strained and closed up with a sinus headache, she could smell what had been denied her so far.
How he had even managed to fit the gargantuan cake inside of her room was a mystery she would never care to solve.
She had officially made up her mind.
>Marry me.
He might have done something besides laugh had she been able to actually look at him and not all but float off the ground towards the singing siren song of sugar, but she could not look away.
>Dead serious. You, me, we're getting married right now. Then we're going to do married stuff right in the wedding cake, I don't care who sees. Inform Cadence I'm moving in permanently and we're officially married now, I can do that.
"You just want to hide in the Empire so you don't have to deal with this stuff."
Not a word of denial could come out of her mouth.
It was too full of cake.
3/4
>>27370070
>Ohhhh~ yeeshhhsshhh~
Savory, sweet, delicious cake that made the whole world seem a little less dark and painful.
That something like this existed in the world, and that someone in this world existed who would bring it to her, was proof there was good in this universe and that it should be celebrated.
"Don't choke now."
>If I do, then I will die happy.
He likely heard very little of her words with how stuffed her mouth was, but there was never a doubt in her mind that he had understood everything.
When the wonderful feeling proved to be too much, she finally let herself stumble back, and plop right back onto the bed, dragging the cake into easy reach with her.
>Thank yooouuuu~
The stallion she was mashing her sweet cuisine ridden and sticky cheek against was passive, not looking bothered in the least that his own pristine white cheek was being tainted with garish frosting colors.
He never made a move to push her away as she dug it in, instead he did the opposite. He reached out to hold her, keeping her from sliding down in her more relaxed state, all of her bones having been replaced with jello so swiftly she hadn't even noticed them gone.
The sigh that escaped her lips just before she floated around yet another chunk of the giant cake was one of pure, utter content.
>Thank you. You have no idea how much I needed this, all of it.
She was happy again.
"I'm glad you're feeling better, because... there's kind of something I have to bring up-"
The door slammed open, none of that ludicrousness of soft sound in consideration to make someone feel better.
For they did not want to make her better.
~CELESTIA! WE NEED TA' TALK, NOW! Get that crud out of yer' mouth and get off that stallion, WE'RE TALKIN'!~
"...Or my thing can wait, whatever.
~NOW, AH' SAID!~
The one she had ascended wished to bring her pain.
>...uh buhhh...
She succeeded.
~~Holy shit i have not written in forever!
>>27370096
And now to wait for it.....
>>27370096
BEST
PAIR
And AJ here to ruin it.
>>27370184
Yuuuuup, there it is.
>>27370184
And Chryssy in the back
She likes to watch
>>27370184
Did you see Spike going in to give her back rubs and cake post Sunset Event? How many snuggles did she get when she trudged to the Empire after AppleCrazy? How many times did Spike go across a country just to help her out when she was feeling blue?
AJ is so green the Grinch keeps thinking she's his cousin.
>>27370096
>Get that crud out of yer' mouth and get off that stallion
Boy, in another setting....
>>27370222
Kek, snorted my damn coffee.
>>27370222
AJ requires more Spike
Yes
>>27370222
>There's a universe out there where we made AJ part of the CE harem instead of Celly
>She got way more cute moments and Celly got nothing
I like to think we ended up in the best world.
>>27370386
Yeah, me too. Because for that to be then other things would've had to change, for better or worse.
>>27370096
Well
They did the stress relief WITHOUT using the Bathtub
Some progress, I suppose
>>27370363
The thing we keep asking for but WE never get off our asses and write.
>>27370651
Huh. Time to change that too, I guess!
>>27370096
NC
~~~~
>Fuck that, BUBBLEHORSE ATTACK!
"GAH!"
CRACK!
~MAH SKULL!~
>TO THE MOOOOONNNNN!
CRASH!
"..."
~...~
"...Hi, AJ."
~Shining. Yer, uh... yer' horn is inside mah' side.~
"First time you've actually had something long and hard inside you in a while, eh?"
~Ah'd buck you if my legs bent that way.~
"I wasn't coming on to you!"
~BUCK DOES NOT MEAN FUCK! They're two different actions!~
"Oh yeah? Which on of them relies on you putting a lot of weight on your hind legs and thrusting in quick, sudden motions until you get too tired to continue?"
~...Fuck you.~
>Cloudchaser
"Derpy"
'Zecora'
~~~
'...I'm sorry, my ears must have shut. You want me to do what?'
>Make a twister with your enchantress magic that I, the greatest Ponyville Weather Captain in the world, will defeat, thus cementing that fact and being so wow that it completely undoes any past or future fuckups that I have not made nor will make.
'...'
"And can you make it a purple twister?"
>Why would she make it purple?
"Well, if it's purple, then that'll really get ponies talking! I mean, I'm pretty sure anyone can stop a tornado, but next time it comes up you just be all "Oh yeah? Was yours purple?" What're they going to say to that?"
>...I've got nothing. Magic Zebra, make it purple!
'Did you get hit in the head? Are you a little braindead?'
>HEY! WHOA! There is no need to talk to her like that, her eyes just do that!
"Do what?"
'This is absurd, the dumbest I've heard! I cannot change the weather with my 'enchantress' power. I doubt I could even change a little flower.'
"Didn't you once make a magic flower that cured cutie marks, and was related to someone telling the truth for some reason?"
>But specific truth, because flowers know that somehow.
"You couldn't just say "The sky is blue" because the flower will somehow know that's not the exact truth needed at that exact moment."
>But oh, tornados, something any pegasus could do, that's beyond your potions.
"As opposed to a potion that lets you see into the past, you can make those."
'...Huh.'
>...
"...soooo..."
'...I will not lie... To do it I will try?'
>BINGO!
"Preconceived notions about the magical abilities of other races win again!"
>This is the best lesson!
'Fuck.'
>>27370054
>She wished them luck.
Ha ha!
Suicide references.
>>27371165
To be fair, that's the least racist thing they ever did.
>18
"Cadence"
~~~
>Cadence? I came through as fast as I could, what did you need me for?
"Wait, what? I called you two hours ago!"
>I had to dig myself out.
"From what!?"
>Let me answer that with a question. What did you need to show me?
"...Ah. Yes, that probably clears things up."
>Annnd, behind door number one we have-WHAT THE FUCK!?
"Pretty much."
>...The FUCK did I miss!?
"Story of our lives."
>>27371165
>"As opposed to a potion that lets you see into the past, you can make those."
I'm pretty sure we never even got to here canon story wise so... yeah.
>>27372413
...Yes we did.
That was season 4 Episode ONE, directly BEFORE they put the Elements back in the tree.
The Elements are currently in the Tree.
We made it to freaking Rainbow Falls, we even have Pinkie Pride in there.
OOCO
>Spike
"SA"
'PD'
(Chrysalis)
{Cadence}
~Applejack~
~~~
>FINALLY! Someone who doesn't want to have sex with Shining to play OnO with again!
'I'm here pretty much every time.'
>I've seen how you look at him.
'Hey, just because I like his coat doesn't mean I want to do him.'
"This conversation is going to unfortunate places and I want it to stop."
(HAH!)
"There, requisite cackling laugh is out of the way, can we switch topics?"
{Is it fair to say 'want to' have sex with him when I actually do that?}
>Past tense.
(HAH!)
'Embodiment of past tense is laughing.'
(At least I got some, dreamer.)
~Iffin' Ah' just start rollin', will we start the game and get off topic?~
'I'm all for this.'
"Me too!"
(If I start rolling will I get on Shiny's topic, if you get what I mean?... Wait, should have gone with topdic... SHIT! Gotta remember that one for next time)
~Ya' assume there's gonna be a next time?~
(Oh, there'll be a next time.)
~Spike, just get us goin'.~
>You find yourselves in a dark, chilling forest-
(I ROLL ADVANCE SEDUCTION ON APPLEJACK!)
"OH COME ON- wait a minute."
~Wait what?~
>WHAT!?
(I can do that, we have definitively ruled by this point I can very much do that.)
{It's true!}
>Why are you helping her!?
{She's not going to fake-bang my husband.}
~She's gonna fake-bang me though!~
>Yeah!
(Thaaats the plan. Any interceptions from Shiny or Cadence, the only two with abilities who can?)
"I'm good."
{Standing by!}
>Poindexter do something!
'Can't, wood elf isn't effected by magic, it would just roll around me.'
>But... but!
(HAH! Criticallll!)
~Awww, crap.~
(And just for this, I brought my holding staff!)
~The heck does that do?~
(Stick to any part of my body, it's supposed to make it easier to open or disarm certain traps. But, right now, it's made to destroy.)
~Destroy what?~
(Your characters ASS!)
1/2
>>27373045
>WHY DOES THAT EXIST!?
(So that I can get some Apple Juice! UNH! YEAHHH!)
~Oooh baby, o-ohhh OHH! Oh mah stars!~
>WHY!?
~Figured Ah'm gonna have fun with it iffin' she's gonna fake-rail me.~
(Ohhhhh yeaahhhh, give my succubus all that love.)
~Yer' so big, ah'm goin' nuts, Ah love it.~
>ALRIGHT ENOUGH!
(This doing anything for you?)
"Some part of this is making me very happy, yes."
>TURN OVER!
(Excellent suggestion! What if we try flipping you like... THIS!)
~Dang girl, leave some of fake me in one piece. Ah'm bout near ready ta' pass out.~
(Oh, by the time I'm done with fake you, you're going to be a mess.)
~Ah' believe it. Ohhh, yer' gonna wreck me.~
>YOU'RE SUDDENLY ATTACKED BY SIX TROLLS, FOURTEEN STONE GARGOYLES OF MAGICS BANE, A SIXTEEN HEADED HYDRA AND A FAUSTDAMNED KILLER RABBIT!
(I'm going to use direct love connection and blast them.)
{Isn't that where you unleash a big blast when you make her... um.. you know.}
(Correct.)
>THAT WON'T-
(Critical.)
~OH YEEEEEEAHHHHHH!~
>...youkillallthethings...
(Mmmm... was it good for you too?)
~Eh, Ah've had better.~
(HAH! Now that's how you roleplay!)
{And it wasn't Shiny for once, yay!}
'And we got so much experience points, the rest of this is going to be a breeze!'
"Wow, everything worked out. Awesome!... where to next-"
FWOOOOOSH!
~...Sugar cube, is there a reason ya' set fire to the board-~
>I sneezed.
TABLE FLIP
Walk out
~Huh. Well, too bad, Ah' was having fun!~
(It was great... I really wish he hadn't flipped the table though.)
'EXCUSE ME FOR BEING A STALLION!'
(For the record, Shiny is way bigger-)
"FOR FUCKS SAKE, CHRYSALIS!)
{She's right though.}
"..."
{What?}
~Ah' need ta' play more often.~
>>27373065
NC
>Cadence
~~~~
>NOT SO FUNNY WHEN IT'S YOU, HUH!?
>>27373065
Ahhh, OnO.
Always a bright spot whenever it arrives.
>>27373065
...my horrible mind is imagining what will happen when Twilight invents the personal computer and ERP can become a thing.
Or when a better version of the simulator comes out.
>>27368379
Go for it. I'd latch onto any excuse to write them doing things together. I've been thinking of writing a story where they play Risk and this might be just a perfect excuse.
>>27361765
>>27361912
I would add her in, but I don't have any particular love for Daw because of the bad impression she gave meeting GC and onwards. I find her presence aren't usually positive interactions, so she doesn't have much of my respect. It's a "your kid isn't playing nice with my kids" thing. I'd be willing to let go of my dislike of her and throw her an olive branch to include her, but I'm not used to the way she talks, so I wouldn't know how to write her dialogue.
>>27373370
>I find her presence aren't usually positive interactions, so she doesn't have much of my respect.
Really? The story when she came back and apologized for her first impression didn't help.
Shame, what went wrong with that particular meeting, maybe we can fix it.
>>27373370
>and onwards.
Wasn't it-
>Meeting one, acts like a cocky jackass and insults everyone
Then-
>Spike asks her why she acted like that and she admitted that she was just trying to make a good impression, since being a pirate when she heard they were rough and tumble badassses that's what she figured they would act like, and when she found out they were offended they apologized
?
I actually liked that bit, rare bit of character development for a her.
That said, while I have no idea what Pommel Anon actually intended for her accent to sound like(it's very inconsistent) I just give her Elizabeth Swan's accent from POTC whenever I write her.
>>27373388
That meeting was actually fine and I was willing to give her a second chance because of it, but then she went back to being negative to the other characters from then on, so I was "welp there goes your second chance and I'm throwing your apology out the window."
>>27373453
When was she negative to the other characters? I can't even remember a time when she saw Spike after that.
>>27373453
Only times I remember her interacting with other Club members was awkwardly hanging out with Spoon that one time and being part of the group that caught Snake Eyes.
>>27373620
The snake eyes thing wasn't even gunclub, the only member there was 77. DT and SS was off somewhere else and would not reappear until the thread before last, Spike was on the beach and PJ was camping.
She hasn't even had an extended conversation with 77.
>>27373664
racist
>>27373478
At the very least her back and forths with DT. It wasn't gelling and unfortunately I couldn't find their barbs funny. I vaguely recall her complaining about members, but I might be just remembering it incorrectly.
The last time I remember Daw interacting with Spike was when they had to dig him out of the snow after he got punted. Another was when Spike and DT had to leave her behind during the 12 rescue.
>>27373747
I don't even remember her talking all that much to DT
I meant to do something with them but something I can't really remember got in the way...
>>27373747
>I vaguely recall her complaining about members, but I might be just remembering it incorrectly.
You're remembering that incorrectly, an anon really didn't like her and a back and forth ensued when he had Daw in NC go over how she sucked, and a large number of random one off sillies followed, because we do that sometimes.
She's never said anything bad about any of the other members in canon except for DT, who she calls a gobshite, because DT does stuff like make her carry TBDRLIATU up a mountain and then later reveal he has jumpjets just because it's funny to watch.
Funny enough, in thread 78(Can't link), when the A-team gets called, she calls DT a gobshite after she leaves her and SS behind, and SS goes "Fuck you, she's still my best friend", and it actually makes Daw back off and shut up about it.
>>27373664
77's a club member, I counted that as her interacting with a member.
>>27373442
Just do a pirate accent, really, the only thing that sets her apart is replacing 'the' with 'th' '.
>>27373967
Oh yeah, I remember that now.
I wrote the mountain thing.
I was actively trying to placate that guy.
GLAD TO SEE HOW WELL THAT WENT
>>27373967
>You're remembering that incorrectly, an anon really didn't like her and a back and forth ensued when he had Daw in NC go over how she sucked, and a large number of random one off sillies followed, because we do that sometimes.
I just realized I deleted the DT in there.
I mean an anon really hated DT, not Daw, and had DAW go over how she sucked, including just telling guards to grab TBDRLIATU from her because she wouldn't be able to do anything. The back and forth was mostly about DT, Daw was just a NC mouthpiece.
There wasn't a back and forth about how Daw sucked.
>>27374060
Was that the 'Just sit on her' thing?
>>27374089
That was one of the lines, yeah. There was a lot of lines.
>>27374097
Are we sure about this? Because I swear that wasn't NC and it was meant to be funny until someone went full autism about how DT would be a champion wrestler or something. And that isn't an insult, the guy literally said it triggered his autism.
>>27374143
For the record, the thing I'm thinking of was during the Peacetrotter debacle.
>>27374143
This?
http://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#22375328
This was wayyyyy pre gunclub.
Also, that autism line was him saying he'd bring up why it wouldn't work because sitting on her is a move that makes her vulnerable, not that she's a champion wrelster. The one guy spazzed out because DT was too "OP" when that was pointed out, and it got into sheer "Character wars" territory,
The smarter of us just did stuff like
http://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#q22378195
desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#22378243
http://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#22378267
http://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#22378540
And my personal favorite
http://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#22378606 plus
http://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/22337892/#22378680
Because even our debates are funny.
>>27374263
Right so I guess I just flat wasn't around for whatever you're talking about.
Kinda pisses me off because I've said it before and I'll say it again 'Fun Pirate Pone is for Fun, Not Drama'. Frankly I'm dreading the slog ahead of me with this damn Sweet Note situation.
>>27374060
Oh yeah, that sounds about right. Daw was being a mouthpiece.
>There wasn't a back and forth about how Daw sucked.
Right and it set off red flags in my head. It poisoned any interest I had for Daw and the negativity just carried on when she called DT a gobshite in canon, so I ended up having no desire to write for her.
>>27374325
>Frankly I'm dreading the slog ahead of me with this damn Sweet Note situation.
Are you really that worried? If so, I can just drop that setup and leave you to her. There is already we set up in there where Pom is no longer involved in investigating her or interrogating her due to conflicts of interests, and everyone has agreed it was just an accident on her part including from her. If you want, just consider it dropped. No more of Pom or her in that particular subplot, I'll sub someone else for what I am planning to do, it's not a big deal. Won't even have any of the characters bring her up except to describe the event, nothing more.
Pirate pony is all yours if you want her back, consider her taken out of the storyline and sorry for worrying you, I got all the most important parts already and don't need to do anything else with her if it's going to worry you or prevent your writing for her.
Sorry about that, and consider her part in that subplot and everything with it over.
>>27374615
I'm just being hyperbolic, I'm used to characters I like getting bitchslapped at this point.
Besides, I've already committed to tying that dumb Baltimare subplot up following this anyway, might as well ride the pain train all the way.
>>27374263
>The dragon balls line.
Classic
>>27374703
Even back then we liked to talk about his balls.
>>27374643
Seriously, I can see this is bothering you, especially with the bitch slap line, so just go ahead with her. Consider her cut free, no more drama going to touch her at all, and no more of this Sweet Note situation is going to even affect her. Her or Pommel, if you want.
Have fun with the pirate pony, we always need more of that.
>>27374748
No damn you, I am NOT some pussy who just lets this shit grt dropped for his own benefit. I WANT you to do this, I WANT you to just get it the hell over with, whatever it is you plan on doing.
I'm not some pussy who's going to just sit back and complain when he gets thrown a curveball. I am going to take what you give me and I will build something even better off of it because I like to write these fucking characters and I am not going to have something just get dropped.
BECAUSE THIS IS PRINCESS FUCKING APPLEJACK AND NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS IT CAN BE FIXED!
>>27374824
Alright?
Well, on that note, to revise. Feel free to use her as much as you want in the interim, because her part still requires a bit of setup out of the way first for what I am going to do next, so don't worry so much about it in the interim, since I'm not just going to get it over with, it won't makes sense right now.
So use her for whatever up to that point, she could even go and under the caves and do that subplot in the leadup. Just relax, I'm not planning on shitting all over her or anything.
Non-Canon
>Applejack
"Rarity"
'Luna'
[Pink Pony Club]
~~~~~
>Welcome to Fireside /pa/ with your host Applejack. It's during this time that Ah' fix things in my sleep.
"Will we be able to wake up?"
>What was that?
"Just glad that I left the window open."
>You worry too much. Ah' called that exterminator. They'll get any bugs we missed and we don't have to pay extra because we got those mosquitos.
"...yeeeeah."
>Anyway got any problems you need fixing...maybe an actual problem?
"Yes...sort of. Would you consider endorsing some products for revenue?"
>You mean advertising and becoming a corporate sellout? Now why in the hay would Ah' do that?
"We are skimping a lot on castle maintenance."
>The castle's doing just fine. It's sturdy.
"We can't keep downsizing and expect to keep the castle's image intact. Ad revenue could help supplement maintenance. Luna has no problem with advertising and she seems fine."
~~~Somewhere else~~~
'Was that Leafball too spicy for you? Mama mia, you should get Alka Seltzer to give you that much needed relief......We're so dead on the inside.'
~~~Fireplace~~~
>Ah' don't think so. Ah' don't want big businesses to think they have control in politics.
A catchy high energy music plays in the background and suddenly Pinkie, Cadence, and DT in different colored outfits, burst in singing
[Wanta Ponka? Dontcha wanta? Wanta Ponka? Dontcha wanta? Wanta Ponka? Dontcha wanta?]
>Pinkie what are you-
[Talking a lot can get real boring, but having a Ponka will keep you soaring!]
>Are you advertising your drink on my show?!
Music stops.
[Well you are shooting in my dreamhouse, so I might as well promote some of my products occasionally.]
Music resumes.
[Wanta Ponka? Dontcha wanta? Wanta Ponka? Dontcha wanta?]
They fade out.
>...
"...so about big businesses-"
>Not...a word...thank you everypony for joining me...on the Fireside.
Gooooood night~
>>27373045
>(At least I got some, dreamer.)
kys my chigger
>>27375242
Crossover!
>>27376168
Both the best kind of crosses, and the best kind of over actually work
>>27375242
Awww, don't worry Lulu.
At least you're just a corporate whore.
>19
“Cadence”
~~~
>…Guess we have to help building, again.
“Yep.”
>Despite the whole investigation thing
“We do.”
>And the whole accusation thing.
“That too.”
>And all of this that said we had to be friends with ponies we hate.
“…Yep.”
>Sometimes, I wish-
“I agree.”
>…
“…”
>…What’re the odds we could slip back through and destroy the portal behind us before anyone notices?
“None.”
>Damn.
>>27377291
>19
>ponies we hate.
>destroy the portal
So you finally decided show your face, 18's evil twin sister, Changeling 19! We are onto your moustache-twirling villainy!
>>27377519
She's converting Cadence too!
All is lost!
>>27377519
>>27377575
Cadence...? Oh no! You guys! She's trying to reach Two to harness the power of Cute, thuS preventing her from curing Sunset and Chitty of their villainy!
WE. HAVE. TO. STOP HER.
>Spitfire
“2”
‘???’
~???~
~~~
>I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMOOOORRRRREEEE!
“It’s just builder blocks.”
>I CAN’T TAKE ANYMORE TOYS! OR CRAZY STUFF! OR CHILD LOGIC! NONE OF IT! I UNDERSTAND NONE OF THIS! I NEED HELP! I NEED SOMEONE TO COME SAVE ME! SAVE MEEEEEE!
FWOOSH!
‘I am taking the little one. We are going to play Candyland.’
“YAY! CANDYLAND WITH FORTY TWO!”
‘Goodbye.’
FWOOSH!
>…ahah…ahahahah…AHAHHAH! AHHHHAHAhAH! I’M FREE! I’M FREE! I’M FREEEEEEEEEEEAHAHAHAHAH!
~AHHHHHHHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!~
>…
~Oh, are we done laughing?~
>…
~Where did BlueTwo go?~
>…Uh buuhhhh…
>>27378000
How cute.
She thought she could escape.
>PJ
“???”
‘Blueblood’
~Haymaker~
~~~
>MMFFFMM!
“Say you’re sorry!”
>MMMFFMMMM!
“Say it! I wanna hear you’re sorry!”
>MMFMFMFMMMM!
“It’s not gonna stop until you do!”
>MFFUUU! MFUUUUUUUU!
“Alright, if that’s how you want to be… TICKLE TICKLE TICKLE TICKLEEEEE!”
>MMMFFFMFMMMMMMMMGHHHMHMHHHMHMHMHMHM!
‘Should we be watching this?’
~I agree… I feel like I should be paying for this, this is some quality entertainment.~
‘I suppose it’s a good thing our shared friend learned the dangers of angering a spiderling.’
~All the swords in the world can’t help without the momentum to push them forwards.~
‘…What do you suppose that web is made of?’
~I don’t question stuff like that.~
‘Smart stallion.’
~I have my moments..~
“Apologize!”
>MMMFMMMMMMMM!
>>27378354
Silly PJ. That's still Sciddys daughter you're fucking with.
>29
“MM”
‘Zecora’
(Trixie)
~~
>…It says something that they didn’t even notice we were gone, doesn’t it?
“Yep.”
‘I live in the brush, so this is not odd to me. That said, the unfortunate implications I do see.’
(YOU WOULD MISS THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE IF SHE WAS GONE!)
>Just like they would miss mine quick and able wit!]
“And my wonderful mayoral skills!”
‘And my potions so fine. Without it you would whine!’
>We’re important!
“…”
‘…’
(…)
>Go back to my place and cry?
“Yes.”
‘Yes.’
(HRMPH!)
>The yesses have it.
>42
“13”
‘2’
~~~
“HOW!?”
>Do not question it.
“No no, this needs explanation, how did you do that?”
‘I dunno.’
“You don’t know!?”
>She doesn’t know.
“How does she not know!?”
‘I dunno what I don’t know, it ain’t complicated.’
“This is very complicated! How did you-“
>Thirteen?
“WHAT!?”
>Don’t question it.
“…”
‘Boy, she sure is silly, ain’t she mister candy man?’
WINK!
“HOW DO YOU MAKE A BOARDGAME WINK BACK AT YOU!?”
‘…I dunno.’
“GAHHHHH!... This is the best time of my life.”
>That’s the gist of it.
>>27379030
Ah. So it isn't Maney's powers, she can just do that.
I am afraid.
>>27379197
SWEET FUCK
TWO IS MATILDA!
>Celestia
“SA”
‘AJ’
~Chrysalis~
~~~~
Seconds after the orange mare had finished, there was silence, staring, and the deathly quiet of information slowly worming itself into the minds of all who were present. Those that had known watched in rapt attention as their favored white pony of choice slowly processed what had been told, waiting to see the reaction in both impatience, and fear.
>…You’ve got-
“To be-“
>”KIDDING ME!”
That, in all it’s perfectly synchronized form, seemed to sum it up.
‘Bout the long and short it.’
~For the record, I only wanted to see Celly’s reaction, and feel bad for Shiny. Shiny, you totally ruined this for me, this was my moment.~
The pair had long since come to terms with the Queen and moved on as swiftly as they had began.
>…Dive into cake to calm down?
“Done.”
The splatter covered the room.
‘Real mature!’
>>27379264
At least they didn't dive in the bathtub.
That would have been a challenge to explain.
>>27379395
It's a shame they didn't dive underneath the blankets and cuddle for support.
>>27379497
>Cuddling in front of AJ
You fool! That will only make her angrier!
>>27379515
>Not locking the door
Shiny you mook
>>27377519
>It's the only changeling who literally has a mustache
>Nobody notices
>Sweet Note
"???"
~~~
>...So this is it.
When she had escaped the dreams that had kept the throbbing in her head at bay, she had found pretty much what she expected. A bed beneath her, some doohickeys hooked up to her to monitor whatever it is they looked for, bandages on her head, and her hooves chained to metal bars to ward off any errant thoughts of escape.
Not that she was feeling able to do anything like that anyway.
>You knew it was gonna happen someday, Sugar Bean, you got this.
Her legs were like jello, her head was like fire, and that was the end of it. She simply did not feel she could move anymore, and when they found her awake, they would come to her, and she was all too aware what came next.
>Just... like ya' practiced, keep your mouth shut, don't let them see you hurt, don't let them get anything out of you. Take your lumps and don't sell out anyone who's gonna be waiting whe... if you get out. You got this, you've practiced a hundred times.
She had never been in this situation before, truthfully. She had almost been caught more times than she could count, but she had always slipped away, always gotten clear of the guard. The others, she had a hard time with, but the guard didn't care and weren't paid enough to catch her if she ran.
That wouldn't save her this time.
>You knew it wasn't gonna be forever, just accept it, and stay quiet.
It was hard, if not impossible, to keep the memories of her wonderful, happy time in Canterlot from coming back. The stares and the glares all had become background noise as she got to sample food she had never dreamed she would ever even get to smell, let alone taste. She had gotten to see things, and do things, she had never even dreamed of.
She remembered being happy.
>You knew it was gonna happen, you knew you were gonna get got, stop worryin' about it... it's your turn in the clink, just go in with some pride.
It would've been easier if she hadn't.
1/3
>>27380073
>Chitty... did you make it out? Did Thirteen? Sunset said she was gonna help you, sorry I wasn't there. This was all I could do.
She didn't regret what she had done.
>It was the best I could give. I really tried this time.
The bonds on her limbs suddenly felt far too tight, and far too constricting.
>I tried this time.
She didn't hold a grudge at whoever had tagged her in the head, she sure would've done the same if anyone had messed with her girls. It hurt, even now it made her head spin, but she wouldn't let it get to her.
>...at least I'm goin' in bragging about how I kicked that guy's ass.
It wasn't much.
It was all she had.
>Ain't like I'm gonna have Chitty to back me up anymore.
That fact became all too real when the door opened, and she had never felt more alone. When a guard, could've been any one of them for all she knew, trotted up to the bed, she had never felt more caught.
She couldn't let them see her scared.
"I'm here to take your official statement as to what happened in regards to the matter of the altercation in the restaurant on Trotsy Street, and your assault on Captain Bronze Pommel."
He was stiff, all business, nothing but the bluntest of words.
She didn't give him anything but a glare.
"I am also seeking any information regarding possible locations if the current fugitive pair of Queen Chitania the Changeling and Sunset Shimmer the Unicorn. Under the Equestrian Protection Act, you are obligated to give any information regarding matters that will help locate fugitives, and any withholding will be penalized, while any compliance will allow leniency and reduction in sentencing or a reward in cases where such is not applicable."
If he wanted anything more than a scoff, he picked the wrong room.
2/3
>>27380081
"If you choose to withhold any information regarding the incident, any future statements will be reviewed and may not be applicable to your case. However, due to the circumstances, the princess has made a special mention of allowing you to speak only to a lawyer if you feel that there is reason to suspect that the government officials will not treat you fairly. If you remain silent, I will be forced to assume this is the case."
She would have spit at him, had she had the ability.
"Very well."
When he approached the bed, every single bone in her body locked up. She couldn't fight back, she couldn't break free, she couldn't do anything at all. She had to just let whatever would come to pass happen, and that was the end.
If he got close enough, she was biting his eye out. She didn't care about the logistics.
"Off the record, the princesses know you're just her food, they're more worried one of their subjects is being used by her, they don't want to put the blame on you. You could make it out of this pretty easy if you'd just point them in a direction. Make something up if you have to, how would they know if it was right? They'd reward you anyway. Just give us something, and you'll probably be walking free in a week. Otherwise... we have to catch her, and we need that information, one way or another."
She did not curse. She did not yell. She did not even growl.
She just glared.
"...Very well."
He never even made it in biting distance, and he was already walking to the door.3/4fuckingwordcount!
>>27380095
"The princess has forbidden any interrogation without her present, I'm just here to collect a statement. You have waived granting one, and this will be noted. When you are stable enough, you will be moved to a holding cell with accommodations for your injury, that is all. Until that point, simply sit and wait. The Princess herself will be coming to collect information soon enough, however she plans to do that. That is all, and call the doctor if your injury persists. Good day, ma'am."
He never looked back as he left the room, and she heard the door lock behind him. Finally, she was alone.
Finally, she could let out the strangled gurgle in her mouth, and stop biting down so hard on her tongue.
Finally... she could stop fighting how much she wanted to spill her guts, and tell him everything he could ever want to know, so long as she got to walk free.
She could stop holding back how much it terrified her that a princess was going to walk in that door.
>I'm sorry, Chitty... I just want to go home...
It was only going to get harder for her, she knew.
>>27380107
MEANWHILE!
>AJ
"Celestia"
~~~
>We are gonna have ta' apologize for so much shit.
"CAN'T HEAR YOU! CAAAKKKKE!"
>>27380167
>There is glaze on my face, in my mouth, on my hair and all over my body... This feels right Shiny... This feels right.
>>27380167
MEAN-MEANWHILE
>Chitty
~~
>...If my nose doesn't stop itching, I'm going to kill myself. It would be a mercy.
>>27380261
MEAN-MEAN-MEANWHILE
>Dash
~~~
>Why did they put me next to the damn hooker? Save the fucking world and I can't get three doors down from the literal hobag?
>>27380279
MEAN-MEAN-MEAN-MEANWHILE!
>Luna
~~~~
>SPA DAY YAYYYYYY!
>>27380357
MANY MEANWHILES
>Snake Eyes
~~~~
>So like am I ever gonna get a trial or something?
>>27380383
ALL THE MEANWHILES
>Dollestia
~~~
>I can see everything you know...
>>27380383
MEANWHILES +1
>Flim
"Flam"
~~~
>Don't count on it.
"Just be thankful to be alive."
>>27380167
>>27380261
>>27380279
>>27380357
>>27380383
>>27380400
>>27380412
Because we're still insane sometimes.
>AB
"SB"
'SL'
{Vekir}
(SD)
~Winona~
-???-
~~~~
>ALRIGHT, EXPLAIN YERSELF!
The object of the filly's fury blinked, having frozen mid step when the other had run up to her. Said object did not look amused.
"Er, Applebloom? I know we do some dumb things every now and again, but... maybe we're being too crazy with this one?"
'Nah, if anything, we need to be crazier! EXPLAIIIIN YOURSELF!'
{Vekir is not with these ponies.}
(How are you the smartest one here!?)
{Vekir has the wisdom of the head of metal! Which is why she knows better than to challenge that one!}
~I could take her.~
>AH' SAID START TALKIN!
The one in front of the crowd breathed deep, cracked their neck, and reached behind their head.
-...Does TBDLIATU have to bomb a bitch?-
"I'm telling my sister you said that, Diamond Tiara!"
-I do not give a fuck. Now, Dooty Mark Chasers, what did you want?-
>...yer' seriously goin' with that?
{GASP! Wielder of dong of metal did not just go there!}
-What did you just call him!?-
{That's what it looks like!}
'She has a point.'
-Screw you, dodo bird!-
'Hold me back.'
-What do you want!?-
>Ah' wanna know why ya' sent us a letter! What do you know!?
-Letter!? What letter!? Me and Silver Spoon haven't even seen you idiots in months! You've been hiding this whole time! Go choke on a- -
{A giant metal male part?}
-...-
{THAT IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!}
-We don't have to take this! I have better things to do than hang out with BLANKFLANKS!-
With a CLACK, her rockets snapped open, and away she flew.
>...Okay, so, couple questions.
"How did she know we had our cutie marks enough to send us congratulations cards saying "the last horse finally finishes the race', but also not know it when she's looking at us?"
>Just the two questions, then.
~Apple! Let me fight her, my blade is beyond her weapon!~
>...She gave us like, fifty bits too, this is weird.
'We need to get to the bottom of this-'
>No.
'...but... adventure-'
>NOOOOOOO!
'Fine, jeez.'
>>27381006
See? She gets it.
>>27381006
>dong of metal
holy fuck Vekir, I needed those sides!
>>27381006
A part of me regrets we brought them home.
>>27381344
All of me wonders how the hell are we meant to use them?
Applebloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle are the most important elements of the lot, that much is definite
So if someone says "I wanna write a thing involving Scootaloo and X,Y,Z" they're kinda fucked cos you not only have to pry her from Blooms and Belles grasp. But you'd realise you have to write something for:
>Dextrous Jaws the attack dog
>I'm-a-Poor-Imitation-Of-a-Pratchett-Side-Character the Morlock
>Possibly-the-most-fucked-up-fetish-insert-and-we-just-haven't-realised-it-yet the walking talking "Doll" thing
In order to free a character up someone's going to have the run the gauntlet of those three and God help them if they do.
What purpose do those three possibly have?Particularly the doll I mean jesus that thing creeps me out how is anyone outside their gang not shitting their pants when they see the two put together?
>>27381504
>All of me wonders how the hell are we meant to use them?
...Just have them wander off?
Why is it 'prying' one of the trio from the other? They're not joined at the hip. Just have Sweetie Belle see something shiny and off she goes, that was literally a plot point to the last leg of their journey.
Why do you have to involve those other three at all? It's clear he just has them there because he likes them. If you don't just have AB go try to talk to Aj again or something.
>What purpose do those three possibly have?
Comedy.
Seriously, Vekir had the funniest line. How is that not obvious?
>>27381557
>Vekir had the funniest lineI have never found Vekir or any of the Morlocks not-dialect funnt
>>27381504
>All of me wonders how the hell are we meant to use them?
Probably just write
>AB
"SB"
'SL'
Or some variation thereof. Then you do a funny. Or if you can't do a funny, you try to do a character thing. Or if you can't do a character thing, do a weird thing. Or if you can't do a weird thing you just write whatever. Or if you can't write you say you don't like a thing and hope the ones who write a thing will do something else.
>>27381593
That's nice?
>>27381593
You're athing that rhymes with 'funnt'.
>Changeling
"Changelings'
~~~
>Hey, guys? The Queen says we're supposed to help out in case someone goes at 13.
"BRING 'EM ON! I DON'T GIVE A FUCK! I'LL FUCK A CHIGGER UP! YOU WANT TO SEE WHAT I'LL DO!?"
"GLK!"
"THAT'S WHAT I'LL DO MOTHER LOVER! I'M A WILD LING WHO DOESN'T PLAY BY ANYONE'S RULES! YEEEEEEEAHHHH!"
>....
"...This is where you cheer, and depending on gender either weep that you ain't me or swoon and fall, like, right onto my junk."
>...You just stabbed that guy.
"WILDCARD LING A DINGS!"
>...
"Can't handle this-"
~~~~
"OH COME ON!"
>Yeah, we locked you up.
"Why!?"
>YOU STABBED A GUY!
"Barely! He's got plenty of blood left!"
>Don't let him out.
"IT'S NOT LIKE I HIT A LUNG!... Little fleas can't handle me right now."
>>27381930
This is what happens when you stick bugs in a room and leave them to their own devices.
>>27381930
I am now hoping we see more of Wildling.
He's like Hotline Miami brought to life.
>>27382459
Rip and Tear
>>27370363
>>27370651
>>27370685
We stopped for three reasons
>their relationship plateaued about thread 10
>He fell by the wayside period
>Spike was one of the things we were using to coddle AJ
>>27370096
Will Shiny ever get one over on Applejack?
>>27373045
>Gets a one-up on Spike via Chrysalis
close enough
>>27379695
So, 55's disguise does work. I thought it was Braeburn and them being nice.
>>27380590
>sometimes
>>27382617
>Wildling later joins the gunclub
>He has the BFG
>Him and DT get into dick waving contests all the time.
I can dig it!
>>27382683
>>Spike was one of the things we were using to coddle AJ
I'm not sure if I agree to that, Shiny in his darkest always had an anchor like that, most notably in the form of Two in the early thread and of course his surprisingly numerous moments with Cadence during and after ever arc. He even had tons of subtle moments with Chrysalis and him and Celly don't get a resounding BEST PAIR every time for nothing.
Having an emotional anchor is important, I think where it failed and why it fell to the wayside is that when it happened, it was usually SPIKE who was the focus, not AJ. Honestly, I don't think there's a better example of it than the Him/AJ date mini, if you re-read it the emotional and central focus was almost entirely Spike and his reactions to AJ, and of course her Family. It was how their being effected him, unlike in the case of Cadence or Two who made it about being there for another emotionally, while also having their own goals and desires, and it also lacked the delicate balance of sharing between them that most Chrysalis/Shining moments usually pulled off.
I will agree that his falling by the wayside period was a contributing factor, but it's possible that this was a contribution. Due to every emotional moment being all about Spike and how he either effortlessly made her feel better or made what she was going through about him, it didn't have the emotional side that kept him not only in the limelight, but to a point where when they're gone, we notice, and it bothers us.
The relationship needed to feel more like an actual relationship, but we haven't quite gotten there yet.
>>27382687
>He tries to fight Chitania
>"YOU'RE HUGE! YOU MUST HAVE HUGE-"
>Gets punted halfway back to the Empire
>>27382769
> Due to every emotional moment being all about Spike and how he either effortlessly made her feel better
that part, that was part my point. When she so much as stubbed a toe Spike was cheering her up ten real time mins later.
I also agree that when he went angsty and started making everything about him like the adolescent he is, his stuff with AJ stopped working.
>>27382822
>When she so much as stubbed a toe Spike was cheering her up ten real time mins later.
Ah, then I will agree to that. It did sort of undercut her development when she was instantly reset effortlessly by him doing a nice thing, and the focus was always how great he was at doing it.
>>27382837
>>27382822
Hmm... so you're both saying that Applejack not suffering stifled her development... interesting.
>>27382859
Not either of them, but there's a difference between her not suffering and her just instantly being back to normal.
Contrast one of the early Spike/AJ scenes with something like the classic Two scene early on when Cadence thinks Two might be trying to infiltrate them, but she's just drawing in a coloring book. The only thing Two did there was, after Cadence accidentally knocked over his papers, pick them up and offer to help. She didn't instantly fix his problem or swoop in with perfect knowledge, and it wasn't focused on her, but on Shining and how he was struggling, and that one simple act just plain made him feel better. A better example is probably 18's start when Shining gave her cookies and she started helping out with the paperwork. Didn't instantly solve his problem, he didn't even interact with her, but it made the emotions more genuine. Something like that where he wasn't just instantly reset, his problems didn't just go away, and it was about him having support instead of someone supporting him.
Actually? There's one story I think sums up perfectly how it should go, let me see if I can find it...
>>27382917
>Actually? There's one story I think sums up perfectly how it should go, let me see if I can find it...
Found it!
https://desustorage.org/mlp/thread/17077404/#17134101
This right here, that's the way to do it.
No, she's not all better at the end, she's not instantly ready to kick ass again and she's going to solve all the problems, and Spike doesn't even say a word to her. The story focus isn't even about her, it's on Celestia. But a simple little moment like this where he just gives her something, and it's not about how much she loves him for it or how great he is for doing it or how smart he was for thinking it, it's about just a simple little sign to show he's there for her, he's going to help her out, and he wants her to be happy. It wasn't even his idea, but that kind of adds to it, to show he doesn't have all the answers, but he's willing to look elsewhere to find them. You want to know the weirdest thing? This sort of scene did pop up once, sometime later. This exact flavor. It was when Jetset gave her the hairclips.
By all means, don't let her suffer. I agree, that doesn't make her character better, but don't forget that the time when she gets back up is sometimes more important than how she goes down, and if we're only focused on the hand picking her up, we're not going to feel like they need each other, and we're not going to feel like it's more exciting when she wins the day again.
>>27382997
I'll agree that story is extremely heartwarming, I agree we need more like that, and more S/A in general, but I will disagree that's the only way to go about it. There's a whole lot of things you can do with a variety of stories that might do just as well. Well I do agree that those are effective, they are not the only way to do it. Romance is a very diverse and very fun method of storytelling, on Thursday could work, but I will agree that our current trajectory with them has not worked out so well.
Not saying you're wrong, just that I disagree that's the only way to go about it.
We need more of pretty much anything with them to feel like a real relationship though I think we can agree on that.
Hey so DT's still super wanting to please her mom in this verse, right?I think I know a way for her and Daw to 'play nice'...
>>27383083
Yep.
Including being willing to spout stupid catch phrases in the middle of a battle.
>>27383073
I am being a little pigeonholing, I admit that. I guess I got a little caught up in what I noticed worked for this thread. Didn't mean to Discount the effectiveness of those stories, but it did come off like that and I see that now. Sorry.
I stand by the ending point though.
>>27383107
Ok!
They'll be playing so nice, Chris Hanson's gonna ask Daw to take a seat!And then I'll finally be able to do the 32 one after...
>>27382822
>Spike was cheering her up ten real time mins later.
Fucking larfed.
>>27382769
>. Due to every emotional moment being all about Spike and how he either effortlessly made her feel better or made what she was going through about him, it didn't have the emotional side that kept him not only in the limelight, but to a point where when they're gone, we notice, and it bothers us.
Hence why the harem works, and we can't even convincingly get Rarity in there.
>>27383490
As someone who isn't a fan of the threesome idea, I'm okay with that.
As someone who's a fan of the story, I'm less okay with Aj and Spike getting so little but still setting up to be endgame. Make no mistake, I've got no problems with AJ and Spike ending up together, but at this rate the Crystal Harem is going to be the culmination of multiple story arcs, devoted mini-arcs, character evolution and a fuckton of silly and serious stories combined, but with AJ/Spike it's going to basically be an afterthought we tack on for a happy ending.
>>27383639
Sounds like we need to fuck one of them up and before both of the "YES, SUFFERING!" and the "SUFFERING IS NOT CD!" crews show up, no its not, BUT it makes for a good story and could open the door for some Character Development and Relationship Development. Just saying, we could bring them close together for a period rekindle the spark of interest and the light it on fire with a whopper of a story. Like say... fighting a threat together, maybe a certain Villain we have on backlog a certain enslaving dog who doesn't even have a name yet... yeah. Something like that, could throw the gun club at it too. Yeah.
>>27383728
It's something, at least.
>>27384145
Better than him walking around like this every so often.
Oooh wow, interestingly enough Spike has for once, sparked my creativity into overdrive.
>>27384824
I love the fact that you make memes for us, it's a magic all its own.
>>27384764
Weirdly heroic.e
Neat
>>27384943
I know right? I finished it and thought to myself. I want to see more of this Spike, he seems like a pretty cool dude.
>>27384764
Now that is a bad ass pic to wake up to.
>>27385262
You think that's something? I just made him a new toy!
My sudden creative urge to draw badass Spike has compelled me to make this for him. I want it so bad, behold!
BlackJack! The Motorized Big Wheel
For badass lulz! Someone... plz, I beg of you, gib him this.
>>27385399
Holy crap it looks like a dual Segway.
I think I'm done for now, so the tally is two badass Spikes and two Dark Days Spikes.
Enjoy.
>>27385587
I'll draw one from a better angle later, I reeeeeally want him to have it for some reason.
>>27385399
>Pussy destroyer
>>27385591
Thanks, as always. I love your work
>>27385399
Ah man that looks like someone trying to make a toddler tricycle look badass
It fits him perfectly
>>27385591
Damn, he really does look bad ass.
>>27385591
>"Are you fucking kidding me?"
>>27385399
I have no idea how I'm going to do it, but it shall be done
>>27385621
I don't believe it, it's actually been done, and it's not that bad looking either!
>>27385399
gread job man 10/4 would rev for more
>>27384824
>Berry Punch takes a shot every time Character development or suffering is mentioned
No wonder she is always drunk.
>>27384764
There is no way he could possibly shoot straight with that, but he looked cool doing it.
>>27385399
The 4-wheeler of death!
>>27385591
Now he just looks grumpy
Good job with all of them.
>>27385932
>4-wheeler of death!
>It only has three wheels
You blind man or mathematically dyslexic?
The best part of waking up, is Spikey in your cup!
Oh, and the art is nice too
>>27385944
I hit the wrong button. They are like right next to each other. Somebody needs to work on that.
Knew I should have gone with big wheel of death, but I felt like that was too much for brand loyalists
Big Wheels were the shit, I wish I could still ride mine, but I am waaaaaaaaay to old and big for it now. I wish there was an adult size, I'd pay for that, ride around on a flat top. Maybe paint it to look less kiddy and mount a swiveling paint ball gun on it.
>>27385591
He is a toughy little dragon and I want to pinch his cheeks.
>>27385399
Since no one else wil...
~They see me rollin', they Hatin'~
>>27384429
>>27384764
>>27385399
>>27385591
Completely. Off. The fucking. Hook.
>>27384429
INTO
>>27384764
THE WIKI
>>27385399
THEY ALL
>>27385591
GOOOOOOOOOO
>AJ
"Celestia"
'Twilight'
~Chrysalis~
-SA-
~~~~
>...
"..."
'...You've got to be fucking kidding me.'
>Bout what Ah' thought too, but Rar admitted to the whole thing via buggo here puttin' me in her brain.
'Can I just point out how weird it is you let Chrysalis move your brain and trust her to only be showing you the truth instead of just making you see a fake Rarity.'
~HEY!~
'Not saying you did that, I trust you, just saying it's weird.
>Sure, go on and call it weird.
'Kinda take the fun out of it when you just accept it.'
>Mah' life now involves a dang giant monster who thinks Ah'm politically assassinatin' her cause she brought mah' failed student back ta' life, Ah'm bout ready to accept the sky is secretly made of pegasi farts.
-Welcome to my world about six months ago.-
"Funny you should mention the pegasi thing..."
>Celly no.
"I thought you said it wouldn't surprise you?"
>It wouldn't, Ah' just said no. As in, Ah' don't want that part o' mah world ta' be revealed yet, keep it ta' yer own dang self.
"Would it sound shocking enough to make everyone forget about this whole thing?"
>Celly no.
'Princess, no.'
~I could make everyone forget.~
-CHRYSALIS NO!-
~I was talking about you and me having a sex scandal, what did you think I meant?~
>Ya'll know what he meant, don't play that game.
~I do, and I love it.~
'Thank you for celebrating as the Equestrian monarchy slowly crumbles.'
~Meh, there's always the ballroom.~
>We ain't distractin' nobody, we're gonna tell the truth.
"That wouldn't be enough anyway. Half the country assumes you're his concubine already, this would just be an "I knew it!" moment."
>Wrong thing ta' take away from what Ah' said, but Ah'll accept it.
~It would if it was you and him.~
"Shiny, join me in the closet."
-Celestia no.-
"I don't want to deal with the paperwork! Protect me from the paperwork!"
SMACK!
>We're doin' the dang paperwork!
1/2
>>27386864
'Wow my life got surreal, I remember when I was terrified you were going to lock up Fluttershy for stealing your bird.'
"What!?"
>Will all ya'll stop yammerin' and let's focus! We gotta get out there and tell everyone the truth-
"Not it."
'Not it.'
-Not it.-
~HAH!~
>...She didn't technically say not it-
~Not happening.~
>Huh... where's Pinkie...
"Applejack, no."
>She could make 'em laugh if they learned about cancer, ya' know it's true!
"I know, but I was completely wrong about this in every way, I feel terrible for punching her through and out of my city, respectively, I hate that I almost let her die and I don't want to even think about how she is probably near dead right now, and I need the one who is in the right to suffer with me."
>...Kinda petty.
"Shiny?"
-She can be petty sometimes.-
"I can be petty sometimes."
>...Fine, let's get this over with.
>>27386866
>"Shiny?"
>-She can be petty sometimes.-
At least she acknowledges it.
>Dash
"??"
~~~
The world would never find her.
She had resigned herself to a life now hidden, locked away from the rest of reality and all it's insanity. She had decided that the third time she almost got exploded to death and the second time she had to try to fight a damn superchangeling was enough for her. Her bucket list had been marked, her life made real, and she was done.
She was so very done, and she was just going to lie there forever, lost in a sea of dreams and maybe more morphine than was medically necessary, but oh so personally necessary. Spitfire could have the Wonderbolts back, they were all hers. Or Lightning Dust, whoever, so long as they left her be. She was alone in her mind, where no one could ever drag her into doing their silly things that ended in battles against impossible foes that always seemed to happen just at the end or beginning of something. She could just be awesome, fight changelings in her brain place without being called racist, and be happy.
She was happy.
SLAM!
"Dashie, Rarity and AJ talked, you don't have to pretend to be unconscious anymore."
>Oh thank fuck.
That bed was itchy.
>>27386864
>but Rar admitted to the whole thing via buggo here puttin' me in her brain.
Wait what happened?
Was that offscreen or am I 2dense for that writers writing skills?
>>27387174
See >>27367671
Or if you're still confused.
>She did not leave, to the ex-unicorn's surprise. She simply faded away, as if she had ceased to be, and left her alone in the room. Alone, still not smiling...
>Two pairs of orange eyelids fluttered open, stinging just a bit as they adjusted to the light of the room once again. When they focused, they came to rest on her fellow alicorn on the bed. Still as the night, slowly breathing, with eyes shut in a state of peaceful rest.
>Even the thought of waking her to a place where she could feel the brunt of those wounds had been one that brought her sickness to her stomach.
>Thankfully, she didn't have to.
>The Queen Changeling standing over her barely gave a nod, the flames on her horn long since dissipating.
>>27387186
...Well fuck me we're getting into Age of Dusk levels of "What did he mean by this?"
Cos I thought at most Chrysalis had teleported the two to castle beds; noticeably more comfrtable, and all sundry hospital equipment too.
>>27387219
.... you thought that they gave Rarity an comfortable bed, I didn't hook her up to any medication or anything?
Why wouldn't the doctors do that anyway well before she ever came there?
>>27387261
Because "Ah clearly the first thing that comes to mind is Chrysalis proxy-mind zotzing AJ into Rarity's sleeping conscious to gently persuade the truth out of her, yes this is an action I believe can happen" is less likely than "beep boop firelight try not to break anything"
>>27387278
Which is more likely when Aj wakes up after she vanishes from Rarity'a sight and then you see Chrysalis standing over her
>Chrysalis did another mind thing
Or
>The doctors didn't put a princess on a comfortable bed or hook her up to any machines or medication
Maybe it's just me personally, but whatever I see scenes like that I just instantly assume Chrysalis did a mind thing. Not knocking you, everybody interpret stuff differently, just saying.
>>27387278
>>27387302
I'm not even sure where the confusion comes in, Rarity didn't vanish, AJ did. And she didn't even actually go anywhere, she was revealed to be right there.
Maybe if AJ had it left or if it hadn't been revealed that Chrysalis was right there the whole time I could see the confusion, but I'm just kind of lost how he got to teleporting her to a bed with hospital equipment?
He literally said Rarity didn't move.
>Pinkie
"Fluttershy"
~~~
>Where were you!?
"Um..."
>YOU MISSED SO MUCH!
"Oh, I'm sorry... do you know what happened?"
>Nope!
"..."
>I missed it too.
"..."
>We reeeeally should stop that.
"It's getting to be a problem, yeah."
>>27387072
>Only wants to leave because bed itches
Dash is not a complicated mare.
>Chitty
“???”
~~~
>…Maybe I should just take a nap. What’s the worst that could happen?
“Chittaaannniaaaaaa!”
>GAH!... MOTHER!?
“I have come to haaauuunnnttt yooooouuuu!”
>Did you come to tell me to avenge your death? Because I’m open to suggestions if there is food involved.
“That was yoooooouuuuu.”
>I’m in a bargaining mood.
“Noooo, I’m here to saayyyyy… you suuuuuuccckkkk!”
>…
“…That was alllllllll………”
>…………………………………………Would it be better or worse if she was a hallucination?
>>27388134
>tfw matricide is the norm for changelings
>tfw you will never have to deal with your nagging mother inlaw, cause in she's dead.
>tfw you will never be introduced to the father cause odds are there were a lot of summer sausages thrown down that hallway
>tfw this cultural point makes the Changeling more appealing if dating in its natural form because you will never meet your inlaws or have to fear that they disapprove or straight up don't like you.
Changeling Waifu's are the best.
NC
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[???]
~~~~
>Welcome to Not Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content does matter, but we're not down!
"Those kids were vicious!"
>Seriously! I didn't expect Silver Spoon to beat on us like that. Judging from the way kids were being eaten via candy metaphors, the Dream Eaters are luring kids here, so they can feast.
"We need to find DT and get help."
>They're mind controlling the kids. How would we set DT Free?
"By using THE POWER OF LOVE! Our love for DT will snap her out of it."
>...That's kinda silly.
"...Silly? Really? What do you think we should do then? Use the power of friendship?"
>Yeah! Friendship sounds like the more likely thing we could use.
"Love is stronger. Don't you love DT?"
>Of course I do, but it's more of an our bonds of friendship is what keeps us close!
"That's dumb Pinkie. It's all about love!"
>No, Friendship!
"Love!"
>Friendship!
"LOVE!"
>FRIENDSHIP!...Civil War #teamfriendship or #teamlove?
"Wait, we're in the park. Didn't Silver Spoon mention..."
>...*gasp* Right!
Later they're sneaking in some bushes. One bush has a crown sticking out, the other has pink puff sticking out.
>I can see DT. Is that suppose to be her mom?
Spoiled Rich is sitting on a park bench and letting DT lay her head on her lap. She's brushing DT's mane.
'Mommy? Do you love me?'
[Of course I do, sweetie...You're my precious diamond. You are my world.]
'But you can be so mean to me.'
[I'm rough on you because I want you to shine. I wouldn't really want to do anything bad to you.]
DT tears up.
'If you care so much then why do you leave me?'
Spoiled Rich gives a kind loving smile.
[You don't have to worry. I'll never leave you ever again.]
>...well she seems nice enough.
Cadence angrily grits her teeth.
"If you can see what I can see right now..."
In Cadence's view, a Dream Eater feeding energy off DT only stopping to give a smug smile.
"...You'd want to murder that bitch."
>>27388214
>Your waifu rapes you and chukcs you down a hole when they're done with you
>Of course some of you degenerates like this
>>27388214
Third poor isn't right, Queens know exactly who their baby daddy is. It's a source of pride/shame because they put such a value in only getting knocked up by rich/powerful stock.
You'll never meet the dad because he's fucking dead.
>>27388233
And now Caddy gets to experiance the joy of the murder boner.
>>27388250
Well not all of them, I'm sure there was some High Society orgy back in the day that some changeling was crashing and having a buffet of dick.
>Spike
~~~~
Admittedly, he was feeling a little bit better. Admittedly, a little bit was a bit of an understatement. There were just so many things that he no longer cared about, things ranging from faces he would never see again to whether or not pulling the trigger would mean disaster for somebody else, and it was only now, after conversing with Rarity… Charity… both of them, that he wondered why he ever had.
Acceptance. Such a marvelous thing; such a marvelous, wonderful, soul-freeing sensation.
And sensations like that were cause for marvelous, wonderful, soul-freeing songs!
>I’m walking on diamonds, whoooo-ooo! I’m walking on diamonds, whoo-oo-ooo! And don’t it feel g-OOMPH! Wuh-what in the…?
He unstuck the newspaper from his face and flipped it over, scanning the front.
>Hive… Gazette. Oh for the love of rubies, what is it this time? Renegade Morlocks come from the deep? A newly discovered tribe of mutant Alicorns? Rarity started some sorta massive brawl and… and… huh.
More or less, that’s exactly what the main headline read, gloriously typed in all caps and followed by no less than three exclamations.
>Welp. Diamond booty always did have a penchant for the dramatic. In fact, this sounds like it’d make a great play with the right actors. I’d pay to see that.
He summarily balled the paper up and glanced around for a bin, spotting one near the bathroom.
>And Spike gets the ball with three seconds left on the clock, he leans back for the shot annnnnnnd….
*swish!*
>BAM! And that’s the game, folks!
>Spike
“???”
‘???’
~???~
~~~
>It’s a brand new day.
With the thought of his talk with Rarity still fresh in his mind, he set out with a new agenda, a jump in his step that had not been there before. He was ready to finally get out there and do good.
It was time to be a protector again.
“STOP! THEIF!”
Perfect.
He saw some hooded stallion run past, a purse clenched in his teeth and a screaming mare behind him. One look, and he knew everything.
Including that with his short, stubby legs, he had no hope of catching up to a fully grown stallion. Charity was already in his claws and ready to even the playing field, but when the stallion reached the crowd, that ceased to be an option entirely.
>Hmm…
In his struggle to think up a means to speed up just enough to catch him, his draconic eyes landed on a single means to do so, and the dragon swallowed his pride, and raced over.
>I am confiscating this in the name of Equestrian A-Team Business!
The poor pony he shoved off his means of transportation was confused as he was shocked, everyone around him was.
Silently, he swore he would return the three wheeled bike he began furiously peddling, and tried not to think of the ice cream the little filly had dropped when he took the bike from her.
>HALT!
The stallion, if anything, only ran faster, stumbling slightly in confusion when he saw the dragon’s approach, but he was not about to be taken out like this.
If only he had known.
>Want to play like that, do you?
His big wheeled bike deftly dodged and weaved though the crowd, the perfect height to slip under any one of those taller than him, albeit with more than a few hooves run over in the process. When he finally got a clear shot, he slammed on the brakes, sliding to the side, and he took it.
‘HA! Missed me, jackass!’
His muffled call only made the dragon smile harder.
>Did I?
He put the pedal down, and then up again as bikes are meant to do, and he pumped with everything he had.
1/2
>>27388564
It was only when the dragon shot past him from the back that the stallion turned his head to the other side of the street, where the ‘missed’ bullet had flown, and he felt a chill go down his spine.
It was only somewhat related to the giant wall of ice beside him.
‘What the-‘
The dragon raced up the new curve in the wall, skidding along the frost covered brick and mortar, now high above the crowd in a vantage point made perfect, before he squared his beloved weapon on the stallion without fear of the bullet flying free.
>Tag, you’re it.
The stallion convulsed as a taser round arced him full of electricity, and down he went in a crumpled heap. When the skidding finally stopped, Spike took a moment to pause, and blow out the smoke rising from Chartiy’s barrel.
>You’re under arrest.
The stallion’s only response was a pained jerk.
The crowd was still with shock at what had transpired, but all too soon they shrugged, and went back to their lives.
>…We’re kinda getting too used to this stuff.
“My purse!”
Deftly, the mare from before took back what was hers, and gave him a wonderous smile.
“Thank you, mister dragon!”
He leaned back in his plastic seat, and gave her a salute.
>It’s what I do.
“Thank you!”
After she had gone, he decided that the guard could pick up the slack from here. He needed to ride.
~AHEM!~
>…Er…
The stern, angry mother tapped her hooves, the little teary eyed filly sitting beside her.
>…Official A-Team Business?
~Give my daughter back her Big Wheel!~
>Oh! Uh, yeah…thanks. It helped me catch a crook.
The filly didn’t even acknowledge his words, already back to being all smiles as she took the seat back, and away she rolled with her upset mother in tow.
Only now, as all was well and back to as it should be, did the dragon say out loud what he thought.
>I want one
If it took him a lifetime, he would have one.
‘Are you going to arrest me or-BBZZT!’
He would have one.
>>27388587
Told you>>27385670 I would.
>>27388599
Nice
>>27388599
We never doubted you for a moment.
>Cloudchaser
“Derpy”
‘Berry’
~~~
>…Brilliant.
“What, seriously?”
>This? This is brilliant. This is like she found smartjuice and drank it all up in smartness. This is going to make me not just the best Weather Captain, I might be best weather pony ever! THIS IS BRILLAINT!
‘Finally! Shomeone understahdns!’
“Uh… I guess I’m not a clever pony, I don’t get it. It looks pretty! It really does, but… how is a giant stack of bottles made out in a perfect facsimile of a pony supposed to make you great?”
>If you were a dragon and walked up to Ponyville, and you saw that, would you try to smash it?
“…”
‘….’
>…
“…”
‘…’
>…
“…Brilliant..”
>’BRILLIANT!’
>Hi hoof!
CRASH!
>…
“…Did you forget that was… glass?”
‘MUH ART!’
>I bet the donkeys did this.
“WHOA!”
>Would you prefer it was you who did this?
“Er-“
>That’s better.
‘FUCKIN’ DONKEYSH!’
>She gets it.
“… I don’t understand art.”
>>27389321
I never understand them, but I love them so.
>>27388233
Pink rage incoming!
>Sunset
~~
She could see why the changelings liked this so much.
Blending in, going unseen, unknown in the world. Untraceable in a crowd no matter how thick or thin. She felt, in a word, untouchable.
Even as she mingled with those who would sell her out, bring her in, take her away in a heartbeat, she never felt a twinge of fear. She never even twitched when a pony locked eyes onto her for just a bit longer than was normal. She never worried they had seen through her and never feared being caught. She was just another pony, as far as the world could see.
>Now, what to do…
The obvious answer was to play the old game. Lure some stallion into an alleyway with promises of a quick bit of fun, drain them and make them forget, and away she would go. She would amass enough love to repair the Titan in no time at all, and then her monster would be ready to be unleashed on the world.
It was tempting, the easiest answers always were, but she held back. Not out of fear of reprisal or reveal, but something else entirely. It would take too long, she realized. She would be seducing and sapping them by the cartload just to make the wait time bearable, and the random factor of how much their love would charge her ran the risk she would be forced to drain half the town before she could make enough headway to return to the Titan to bring her up enough they could move on. A dozen ponies being hidden was a challenge, but doable.
An entire dance party’s worth suddenly vanishing was another story entirely.
>There’s got to be an easier way…
1/2
>>27389601
There was, and she knew it as well, no matter what she muttered to herself. There was a way that was a little easier, and a lot quicker. It was both not nearly as dangerous of falling in on her, and so much more dangerous to tear her plans apart.
The risk was a great deal more so.
The reward was speed, ease, and her plans moving forwards at a time faster than slow molasses.
It was a gamble.
>I never was much of a gambling mare…
A stallion caught her eye, and when he looked to her she knew right away he would have been an easy target, easy to drain and forget before the hour was out. It could all begin right there, and beneath her breath, she made her choice.
>But what’s the point of living, if you don’t take a risk every once in a while…
And she was nothing, if not alive.
>>27389621
GAH! What is your plan, mare, WHAT IS IT?!
No, but seriously, I might need to know for future storyplanning. I know some of us like to play with their hand hidden to make the suspense rgeater, but DAMN, does it make writing for characters involved in an on-going scheme of another writer difficult.
Though, I'd settle if you told me how long I'll have to wait to actually read a hint of what she's gonna do.
>>27389646
Tomorrow her 'plan' goes off.It's not what you're thinking.
Going to leave for a bit, if you need to know specifics for a story tell me as I'll fill it in later tonight.
>>27389691
I'll wait. I like to read as much as I enjoy writing stories.
>Cloudchaser
“Derpy”
(???)
{???}
~~~
>I want you to know, none of this was on you.
“Oh, thanks! Finally!”
>Because there is no way you could have come up with something this awesome!
“…Oh.”
>BEHOLD! My new anti-dragon thingamagigger!
“Why are you preparing for that?”
>Because someone, HINT HINT! Broke my previous Dragon Scarecrow… scaredragon… you know what I mean.
“So how is this-“
>BEHOLD!
BWWOOMMM!
(THIS WAS A BLOODY STUPID IDEA!)
{Are you kidding, Tavi!? This is amazing! GIANT SPEAKERS ON WHEELS! AWESOMEEE!}
(Why is my cello hooked up to it!? That’s not how this thing works!)
{Nah, it’s not for the sound, got my own tunes rocking here and don’t need your fancy whines to get it going.}
(Then what the devil is it for)
FWOOM!
(GOOD LORD! Is that fire!? WHY IS MY CELLO SHOOTING FIRE!?)
{Why not, is the better question!}
(Because these speakers are flammable!)
{Oh… yeah, I see how that would be a-)
FWOOSH!
{Uh oh.}
(AHHHHHHHH)!
>…
“…At least they had fun?”
>This is all your fault.
>>27389985
I still have no idea how this spawned or why, but every story reminds me why I don't care.
>>27390112
It happened because Applejack.
The end.
>PD
“Gwen”
~~
>Ugghhhh… my… my head…
The pony did not leave the bed, she merely fell despite barely moving, and somehow where she landed was not bed related.
>Ow.
“This is why I never drink.”
The griffon, likewise, had aspirations of leaving the tangled mess of sheets. Those aspirations, much like her dreams of having a life without children, sadly never came to be.
>Ow… owww… Gwen… Gwenny… Gwenny what did we do?
“I have blacked out the entirety of the previous night. I take it to mean my brain is trying to protect me from something, and I will not challenge it’s will.”
>Gwenny I don’t remember what happened and I can taste vomit.
“That would explain the smell.”
>Gwen… Gwen I need a favor, I’ll even call it even for the moth machine… bring coffee… Gwen bring me coffee.
“I’m not one for coffee, would you like some tea instead?”
>…
The bullet never came close, but it was the thought that counted.
“Is there a reason you’re trying to shoot me?”
>You’re clearly a changeling, only a changeling who doesn’t drink would be able to resist the wonderful bitter feeling of coffee. You hate it because you don’t need caffeeeeeine.
“Tea has caffeine in it.”
>You’re still a changeling.
“…So is that a-“
>Yes I want tea, please don’t poison it.
“I’ll try.”
>…Are you gonna-
“My hind legs are asleep.”
>Crud. We’re going to die in here.
“Considering that I see my royal robe tangled in the ceiling and covered in vomit… it’s probably for the best.”
>…I like hanging out with you.
“What was that?”
>NOTHIN-ow.
>>27390378
Well, Idris is going to be miffed.
That they didn't let him watch.
>>27390378
...is it bad that I want this to be what it looks like, and not whatever it "actually" was?
Like shit maybe I've just pent up the lewdness for too long or some shit but I feel the need to write stuff for the After Dark
>>27388587
Because sometimes we do stuff like this, and it's wonderful.
>>27389691
SO it doesn't involve2, 29, Love harnesses, or the Crystal Heart?
>>27390112
because Derpy is that good of a lay
>>27391060
...Maybe it kinda involves something you're thinking of.
That's all I'll say.
>>27391091
That and she did a fusion dance with the Pinkie Prophesies.
>SA
"Celestia"
~~~~
>Celly?
"..."
>Don't drop the sun.
"I wasn't gonna!'
>Cellllyyyy.
"..."
>No dropping the sun.
"..."
>None of that.
"..."
>Sun stays where it's supposed to be.
"..."
>Stay.
"...I'd save you!"
>What about Cadence, Two, Twili, Eighteen, Forty Two, Chrysalis, Spitfire, Maney, my parents... do I have to go on?
"Yes, why was Chrysalis above your parents-"
>Celly no.
"Just a little genocide!"
>No.
"Awwww."
>...
"...I'd save Two too."
>Not good enough.
"RATS!"
>>27392077
>Won't save his wife
Oh, Celly...
>>27392407
Chances are she'd survive, either Alicron endurance, stupidity or sunbeams bouncing of that flat ass.
>>27392660
>Alicron
Ponies! Change Shape and trot out!
>>27392749
> MLP!
>Pretty much exactly what you think ~
Goodnight thread
>>27391091
How does that correlate
How
>>27393670
It just does
Schmoe, what are you doing on /sug/?
>>27394483
Ssshhhhh... I'm not tied to one show at a time. I love cartoons in general, if it gets my juices flowing it's good enough for me, so don't read too much into it.
...What where you doing there?
>>27394505
reasons
Board need Sentai Bugs again
>>27394767
It has been a long while since then Rainbolts showed up.
>>27394910
>Most noteable background lings are missing, along with the Cellys Greesey Sun Stallions.
I imagine an adventure like one never told before, filled with Saddle Arabian Sun Terrorist and Neighponese Assassins. Yeah.
>>27394910
>Awkwardling
"Maud"
'???'
~~~~
>Um... so everyone is yelling again.
"They do that a lot."
>Don't wanna rock the boat or anything, I like the boat when it's nice and steady and doesn't go anywhere, and just kinda... trailing off, sorry. Point is, should we... look at it?
"Do you want to?"
>Well, I mean, if you want to we can, or if you don't wanna I totally understand and won't hold it against you or anything it's fine it's all just fine no biggie!
"Hmmm... what do you all think?"
'We should investigate!'
'Someone might need our help!'
'FOR JUSTICE!'
'Someone might need...'
'''''THE RAINBOLTS!'''''
RAINBOOOOM!
''''RAINBOLTS! TOKUSENTAI!''''
>...You um... don't wanna criticize, but you set that banner on fire.
'OH SHIT!'
'I knew we overdid it with the explosives!'
'Way to lay the charges, YELLOW!'
'Fucking Yellow!'
'Awwww...'
>...More tea?
'Please!'
"Aren't you going to put that out?"
'Pfft, silly, we're superheroes, not fireponys!'
'Oh, that Maud!'
'''''AHHAHAHAHAHHA!'''''
"...I like hanging out with all of you."
>>27395299
Um, shuldn't
>RAINBOOM!
come after
>RAINBOLTS! TOKUSENTAI!
?
Or am I remembering that wrong?
>>27395381
Fucking Yellow
>29
"Trixie"
~~~~
"HRMPH!"
The door to his beloved abode was slammed open with a rapturous thunder, nearly broken from it's hinges by the fury of a single sadistic slam. The irascible irritation of the clopping stomping hooves that followed it all but rattled the homely abode as the unicorn scuffed the floor every time her hooves would descend.
>Will thou not even speak with the breath of anger to regale mineself with such the tale of what has brought thee to such a state?
"HRMPH!"
Thunder erupted in his well furnished but paltry room, called out by none other than his bedroom door in a wail of pain from the abuse suffered by the unicorn's unending gait. Many a deadbolt did click before a flash under the door lit like a fire in the sky, warning all others to be quick and run away, lest they be consumed by it's flame. The would would hear no more of the unicorn for the night, and she would hear no more of it.
>Oh, very well...
Long since the day had it been where he would question the one he called companion or her antics, the being known of fire and of deception was a keen sort in the knowledge of emotions, and with that cleverness came the wisdom to know better than to challenge such a mare in a state as she was.
>If the foolish one thinks me of a sort who would sleep on the couch, I bring my pity to bare!
With a single sweep of his luminous horn, the door opposite the room swept open with flourish befitting his gracious movements. Revealed to him and no others was that which had cost him a great in his funds, a worthy investment in a time such as this.
The 'guest room' awaited him, and he would keep from it no longer.
>Hark, to thee! Mine bed to bring me comfort! So long have I spent in motion, racing against the specter of death that haunted me and sought my soul! To your comforting softness, to your sheets of warmth, hark be to my bed that I have missed so, welcome me into thine bosom.
1/2
>>27395642
The room that awaited him was not large, nor was it fit for the dream of royalty such as himself, yet right now it could only be compared to the most decadent of abodes, a king himself would call it a wonder.
The temptation sang it's siren song to call him into the embrace of fabric and feather, and to his resting place final or not he would follow it.
>Embrace me, mine-
~Hello, Twenty Nine.~
>AHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHH AHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHHHHHHHHAAAHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
His girlish and high pitched screams drowned out the rapid steps of his hooves and the sound of his body bouncing off the walls as he ran around in pitched circles, wailing and looking for the exit that he just couldn't find.
>AHHHHHHHHHH-
His screams ended with a loud THUNK when he attempted to make his way out the window, which proved too much to break, and left him with little more than a flat face and nothing else to show for his efforts.
~...You done-~
>AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
The shape that had been so well hidden in the shadows let out a sigh, turned on the light and settled in wait for him to finally focus.
>AHHHHHH-... Sunset?
~Hi.~
>...Hi.
~...~
>...
~For the record, this went waaayyy different in my head.~
>>27395653
A part of me knew she would go after him first.
No part of me knew I was going to laugh that hard.
>>27395653
Man I hope she doesn't fuck him up or ruin this.
He's like, one of the last decent parts of her life and a good influence on her, she needs something besides Megabug in her life, and his whole theme is 'finding lost souls' and all that.
I just want them to stay friends.
>AJ
"Dash"
~???~
~~~
>No.
"Are you sure?"
>Positive.
"Is that solid hundred or a maybe sixty five?"
>Hundred.
"...Mayyyyybe-"
>Nope.
"Just in the leg?"
>No parts.
"...Please?"
>Ya'll can't go punch Rarity.
"I WAS SHOT IN THE HEAD!"
>Hrm...You know what? Fair's fair, ya'll can punch Celestia.
~WHAT!?~
"..."
~I shoot lasers and have a bubblehorse who can conjure unbreakable shields, your move prism pony.~
"...I'll wait till she's asleep."
>Fair enough.
~So why can't she punch you for accidentally causing all of this neglecting Sunset-~
>Sorry, just realized ya' can't hit her.
"OH COME ON!"
>>27395807
The guy took TRIXIE in, he'll forgive Sunset.
>>27395974
Trixie isn't really a bad person when you get right down to it. Cocky, not very repentant, and crazy boastful and a bit of a dick, but she's not really bad.
Sunset's kinda in "I'mma getcha, Princesses" mode.
>>27395098
>Cellys Greesey Sun Stallions.
You mean those over the top muscle guys? Are they canon? I remember that was a discussion since their first appearance isn't canon due to OOC Chrysalis, and then all of their other appearances were marked NC.
If they are canon, what parts? Like, what's their backstory, who have they met, who knows about them ETC...
>>27396140
We never got an answer to that when it came up like a year ago. As far as we know, their first appearance isn't canon, their second story isn't canon because it follows the first directly, most of their appearances aren't canon, and we literally have no idea who knows about them, if they are actually out there, or if they actually exist.
Currently, the only one who would know about them if they exist at all is Celestia, nobody else ever met them.
>DT
"Filthy Rich"
~~~~
>DADDY!
"Pumpkin! Oh, I'm so happy to see you again! Did you have fun?"
>I shot her with my castle crusher!
"You did!? Well, I hope someone caught a picture, I have to see that!'
>I doubt it, the blast alone would have blown out any lens.
"Oh trust me, I saw the light! But maybe someone got that picture of when she was almost hit. The look on her face before my little buttercup hit her with a heavy munitions has to be priceless!"
>It was so much fun! I even got to fly around her and do a teamup with Princess Celestia!
"You did!? Well, that Celestia sure is a lucky princess, she got to fight a giant monster with my little filly!"
>Dadddyyyy!... It's true.
"Of course it is! Say... do you want to go get some celebratory ice cream?"
>DO I!?
"Well, you've certainly earned it! Let's go to your favorite place, assuming it wasn't destroyed in the hailstorm of missile fire and giant monster hooves."
>It isn't, I made sure to make any block busters miss!
"That'a girl, thinking on your hooves!"
>C'mon, TBDRLIATU, let's go get some ice cream! Don't worry, Daddy will cover your bill too.
"Of course, anything for the best team in Equestria!"
>YAY! You're the best ever, daddy!
"I know, honey! I know."
>..
"...So just to double check, the suit-"
>It was mom's idea.
"That does not actually make me feel better, but I'll wait to dwell on it. Ice cream! Yay!"
>Yay! This is gonna be the best... day... ever.
>>27396337
Dawwww.
>>27396570
He's still best dad for a reason.
>Bat-mom
"Dadling"
*Babyling*
~~~~
>Fantastic, I didn't get to join in.
"No apologies!"
>No no, it's fine, not like I wanted to do anything cool or anything like that! Not like I wanted to join up into an amazing battle to fight against the evil threatening my town, I'm fine! Totally happy! This is my happy face!
*Giggle!*
>You're laughing at me too! The spawn of my loins if laughing at me! I'll be a laughing stock! The Nightgaurd will never let me live it down!
"How will they know you weren't there?"
>A doy, they probably looked around and didn't see me, not complicated!
"Did you see any there?"
>No, but what are the odds they didn't...
"..."
>...I'm never going to let them live it down.
*Giggle!*
>You, baby, you may laugh. Join me in the joy.
"Soooo, how's about we go back home and... celebrate?"
>Are you insane!? We have a kid now!
"..."
>Let's drop him off with my aunt and then we go back and snuggle each other so hard we'll wreck the rest of Canterlot.
"...Snuggle?"
>The baby is right there!
"But... but all the other..."
>...
"Stuff makes you totally right, so I'm wrong."
>Smart ling. To Auntie's house!
*...*
"Yes, my pride is worth dat mom."
*Giggle!*
"Laugh all you want, I still win."
>>27396868
>"Laugh all you want, I still win."
Doesn't matter had sex!
>>27397047
Better than 90 percent of the cast.
>>27395947
Oh, Aj. You can be a bitch sometimes.
>Cloudchaser
"Derpy"
'???'
~~~~
>We can explain this.
"How? I'm seriously asking, I just want to know before we do it."
>With... with puppets! Yeah!
"Oh! Yes! Puppets make everything better!"
>Yes! I'll be... Misses Tuber!
"Yayyy! Nice to meet you, misses Tuber!'"
>And you'll be Sock The Jock! Perfect, right? Now, for characters, Misses Tuber is the one who tells the kiddies all the lessons at the end.
"Of course!"
>And Sock the Jock is the screwup who needs to be taught the lesson!
"Doesn't that perpetuate the stereotype of athletic or well built stallions being dumb jerks for no other reason than that they enjoy playing a sport?"
>NO! This is a stable formula that teaches kids valuable lessons of not judging a book by it's cover unless it's the specific book we want them to prejudge in order to make our point! It's for the kids!
"Oh... okay! So long as it's for the kids!"
>Good, now... get ready!
~~~~
>Boy, Sock the Jock, it sure was a bad idea to open a place like this in order to fund your smart anti-dragon arsenal, wasn't it?
"Dooooohhhh, I'm just a big dummy."
>But the important thing is that you can learn to be better, and if you learn you can be forgiven, right?
"Right!"
>Yaayyyy! And now we all learned a lesson about forgiveness.
'...'
>This is where you applaud.
'...Why did you turn my henhouse into a strip joint?'
>It seemed like a good idea at the time!... Is what Sock the Jock told everyone! Right!
"Right!"
'Is... is there a market for this, do you get customers?'
>I'll tell you one thing, I'm not looking at Blues the same way ever again.
'...'
>PLEASE DON'T USE YOUR CHAOS MAGIC ON ME-... SOCK THE JOCK!
"I'm sooowwwwy!"
'I feel like I should call someone. I don't know if it's the guard, a psychiatrist or your parents, but someone needs to be called.'
>Just don't call the weather service, I don't want them getting the wrong idea.
'...'
>PERFECT RECORD!
'...Parents it is.'
"Yay! I love talking with my mom!"
>>27397754
Cause the shitpost that started this was Applejack and not Rainbow Dash.
>>27397754
Trolls tried that back in the day, along with other princess version. Died off after like ten posts when it became abundantly clear this only works because AJ is the middleman who can lean one way or the other, and is actually capable of looking after Eay tetris.
>>27397787
>Eay tetris
I don't even know what my autocorrect thought I was trying to say when I meant Equestria.
>>27397787
I'm willing to put more money on nobody wanting to start over, he did it around thread 18. It was post Chitania, even.
We'd gone through three arcs by then, we were too invested to start over.
>>27397796
I am trying to come up with what the magical land of Eay Tetris would be like, but all I can do is giggle uncontrollably.
Sorry.
>>27397672
>'...Why did you turn my henhouse into a strip joint?'
SCOOTALOO NO!
>>27397871
Maybe after we finish this ride, we'll do Princess AJ reboot.
>>27397906
>Implying he'd actually do anything with a non-royal>...His world tour doesn't count.>Also except for MM that one time>Probably Zecora too.>...Shit, he'd probably give Trixie a go if he was feeling like it.
>>27398145
>Not Princess Applebloom
>WHY THE FUCK DID YA ROPE ME INTO THIS!?
"CAUSE AH NEED MORE HELP!?"
>GET SCOOTALOO SHE'S WAS BASICALLY BORN TO BE AN UNDERLING!
"..."
>She's right behind me isn't she.
"Mhm, not so much anymore."
>DAMN IT, I BLAME YOU!
>>27398607
...Oh my god it'd be perfect
we need to do this
and make sure Shiny has his wings so he can stay as a side character.
>AJ
"Celestia"
'SA'
~Chrysalis~
~~~
>So should Ah' at least wait for the party to die down before Ah' tell them that they're essentially celebratin' they won a crazy ass barfight?
"It's up to you, I'm trying not to think of any of this. It's not working."
'I'm trying to be understanding but still imagining Chitania's head exploding into a mess that would take generations to clean.'
~I'm trying to figure out what next to put on my brownie. Another layer of sprinkles, or shall I go for the gold and start spreading the caramel, never knowing when to stop and uncaring as to when that time has come and passed?~
"You could at least pretend to care that dear Applejack is about to break the one single happy event that my ponies have shared in for months."
>Go fer' apples.
"Applejack!"
>What? Puttin' apples on a brownie tastes amazin'.
~Meh, not a fan.~
>...Burn her.
~HAH!~
'She's not kidding. Cadence has scars.'
~BRING IT!~
"Oh yes, because we've learned nothing of engaging in battles with changeling Queens."
>Just throw Shinin' at her, she'll stop.
'Gee, thanks.'
~Do that. You should totally do that. Riiiight here.~
'No.'
>Ah' tried, ya' owe me for that one.
'And terror has gripped my heart like never before. I'm afraid. I am so very afraid.'
"Don't worry, if they ever conspire together, you and I just need to team up. They have no hope of victory against the Mighty Whitey."
>Ah'll give ya' cake if ya' betray him.
"...Tempting."
~HAH!~
'I think I liked it better when all of you hated each other.'
>>27398697
AJ is surprisingly awesome here, and in the last one. Her deadpan delivered wit is freaking hilarious, I can see her with an expression that reads "I'm so fucking done" but still doing what needs to be done anyway.
>>27398697
>'I think I liked it better when all of you hated each other.'
Well of course he did.
Then he got to be the deadpanned snarker.
>Cantie
"Cantie 2"
~~~
>I'm starting to think the upper management doesn't care.
"We should hold an election!"
>You don't elect a princess.
"But... but we have mayors. Mayors we elect."
>...Huh.
"So, wait, was the option always there, we just never used it?"
>Huuh... huh.
"...Who would we elect instead of the immortal super sunraising horse, though?"
>Couldn't she just say if we don't elect her she'll stop raising it up?
"..."
>...
"..."
>...Damn, got us by the balls, don't they?
>>27399273
Don't you want to be a princess too?
>>27399618
>The adventures of Princess Cantie 1&2
fund it.
>Spike
"Sale Pomy
~~~~
>So does this model have good ponypower to it? I don't need something light.
"...It's a big wheel."
>What about this one, can I get any addons? A holster would be worth the bits, no matter how much extra it is.
"It's a big wheel."
>What's the replacement cost for the wheels? My line of work, that'll add up pretty fast.
"I... I don't... it's a big wheel!"
>Alright, you don't have to hard sell it, I get it that these are pretty good models, I'm just shopping around.
"What!?'
>I'm sure you get a commission, and I want to help you out, but I've got to look out for me here, I can't skimp or overpay, you get me?
"...It's a big wheel."
>Look, maybe I'll just head to the next dealership, really just shopping you know?
"Dealer... what!?"
>Do you have versions not in plastic?
"NO! It's a big wheel!"
>Ah, shoot... well, would save on short term with rubber, but long term that'll getcha.
"IT'S A BIG WHEEL!"
>You know what, I'm going to take some literature, and maybe I'll come back. Do you finance?
"They're forty bits!"
>I get it, it's a deal, but all at once can be a pain, yeah?
"...I'll get you some spare instruction manuals."
>That's what I love to hear, nitty gritty!
"...So you get it's a-"
>Does this come in orange or white? I don't know which one I want, just want to see them.
"I... right over here."
>Now we're talking!
"...IT'S A-"
>Big wheel, got it.
>>27400200
Slowly but surely he's coming back to being relevant in the best way.
>>27396140
>ike, what's their backstory,
I never remember that anyway, what was it supposed to be? She just mysteriously made these superstrong super-powerful and good-looking stallions out of... Magic? And they are Immortal too? But she never use them for any reason because... uh...
Those guys always confused me, I'm normally down with the rolling with it for the laugh, but in this particular case I didn't know enough about them to laugh at them or know what they were about
>>27400403
They are five regular stallions she wanted to fuck, that she basically magically screwed with until they a) looked as masculine as possible b)wanted nothing but to please her and c) were resistant enough to her nuclear vag that fucking was possible.
She could use them, they are immortal, but after they got sent away by her mother the first few times and she made them good for nothing but being her sex slaves, bringing them in to do anything but worship/fuck her was deemed pointless.
>tmw you write part of a really long story
>whole thing closes suddenly
>doesn't even ask to save
>can't find
Welp, that's a bitter pill to swallow....
>>27400451
True, but they're actually based off the Custodes from 'If The Emperor Had Text To Speech'. They still ended up serving a purpose, like... saving the common people from the inquisition who were burning the planet. We could have had them pop up to save civies.
>>27400451
...,that's a surprisingly fucked up backstory.
That is somehow, by far, the darkest backstory any character has had, and I'm including Chitty in that.
Damn, that's fucked up.
>>27400498
Sorry to hear that, and I know it doesn't help now, for the future, Lazerus, man.
It'll save a life.
>>27400451
I want them to meet Jetset now for some odd reason....
Ok, I can't do it, fuck it. I cannot write a reconciliation between Daw and DT. Daw's out of the club, you win.
>>27400730
It is okay, you tried and that is that counts. And Daw doesn't need them to be more of a character. Plus she has had more scenes than the GC has as the GC since their last interaction
Notwithstanding that those who pitched a fit to begin with would have tried to undo it just like last time, because reasons that sound like lack of respect but look like DT is the top/only bitch allowed in the club. Because the rest of them all have to deal with DT, so someone who can't turn their mouth off shouldn't have been some new confusing problem that prevented meaningful interaction.
>>27400730
Not sure who the 'you' is, but okay? Sorry to hear that.
>>27400606
>Yeah, this is my two weeks notice. When I signed up, I was under the impression I WASN'T under risk of having my body warped beyond recognition and I'm not going to lie the fact they're completely and utterly devoted to your every whim and ME being super loyal when I remember being pretty damn against that is sending up approximately all the red flags and I would like to get out now. This is my two weeks notice, which you'll notice I submitted last month. I'm that good.... bye!
>>27400816
>Notwithstanding that those who pitched a fit to begin with would have tried to undo it just like last time
Coming off kinda paranoid there, might wanna be careful about seeing it lest you see persecution in every criticism, and your work both degrades and becomes less pleasant as you attempt to stick it to forces only you can see.
Unrelated, but there's a big difference between a bitch you've never met wanting to join the club an insulting you like a sailor and making a club with a friend you know, understand and trust. It was never about her not being able to turn off her mouth, it was that this was interaction ONE with her, and of course nobody's going to take that shit from someone they don't know and have no reason to like.
>>27400816
>Notwithstanding that those who pitched a fit to begin with would have tried to undo it just like last time
>I can't do it and I shouldn't even try because obviously everyone would try to undo it anyway.
FFS really?
> because reasons that sound like lack of respect but look like DT is the top/only bitch allowed in the club
>I wrote someone acting like a bitch and the audience, not the characters, didn't like her, clearly it's because of this other reason that would prevent me from ever succeeding, so I shouldn't even try.
FFS, really?
> Because the rest of them all have to deal with DT, so someone who can't turn their mouth off shouldn't have been some new confusing problem that prevented meaningful interaction.
>If someone can put up with a friend's shitty attitude then obviously they're okay with a stranger being just as shitty despite not fighting off a damn robot for them so you know they're good deep down.
FFS, really?
>>27400816
Don't start shit, man. It's my fault. Should have never even tried.
>>27400730
>reconciliation
But... they aren't on bad terms, their last interaction was helping Spike out of the snow, then DT flies off with him, then 12 rescue arc.
They haven't seen each other since then, they don't need to reconcile, unless it's just Daw forgiving DT for pulling a dickish prank on her, or Daw telling Silver Spoon she get why she stuck up for DT or something.
What's there to reconcile? Their 'animosity' was DT pulling pranks and Daw calling her names.
>>27400940
She needed to play nice, anon. I couldn't make my kid play nice with his kid so my kid needs to be removed from the playground.
>>27400853
DT's first interactions with 42 and 77 She tried to kill 1 because she was a changeling and the other held a knife to her throat. I'm sure the barbs thrown at 3 people who deal with Chrysalis on a regular basis and 1 who is just as insulty but coupled with an ego the size of Canterlot really hurt. And before you throw Spike in all he would have known prior is the CMC hate her and she has a rocket launcher.
>>27400894
>I can't do it and I shouldn't even try because obviously everyone would try to undo it anyway.
Not not try, just could be a fight, worded too strongly though
>I wrote someone acting like a bitch and the audience, not the characters, didn't like her, clearly it's because of this other reason that would prevent me from ever succeeding, so I shouldn't even try.
I really think DT not just winning the exchange was most of the problem
>>If someone can put up with a friend's shitty attitude then obviously they're okay with a stranger being just as shitty despite not fighting off a damn robot for them so you know they're good deep down.
I missed the part where DT wasn't a bitch in the threads between GC formation and Blueblood's arc and befriended them before they became foxhole buddies
>>27400929
I didn't say that.
>>27400940
consensus is Daw needs to apologize to Diamond.
>>27400929
Yeah yeah self loathing shouldn't have done this gotcha whatever, but what's the issue here? Like, what thematic, or character portion, piece is making this hard for you? They've had so little interactions and there's such a gap between their last meeting it's perfectly malleable as a situation. What's blocking you, exactly? Is it you don't quite have a handle on Daw or DT, and you're not sure how one would talk? The setting isn't right? The emotion isn't there? They don't have enough in common to work with?
What are we working with here?
Move over, there's a new alicorn in town
>>27400969
She isn't even the newest
Non-Canon
>Pinkie
"Cadence"
'DT'
[Spoiled Rich]
~~~~
>Welcome to Late Night /pa/ with your hosts the Pink Pony Club! It's during this time that content doesn't matter, and we protect our knees!
"GET OFF HER ARROW!"
'Look out!'
She turns TBDRLIATU into a riot shield and deflects the arrow.
>DT! Move away from her! HOOF OF THE NORTH PONK!
Pinkie drops in behind and launches into a flurry of punches against Spoiled Rich. Spoiled Rich just smirks while dodging until she flips the park bench at Pinkie. Pinkie smashes it. Spoiled Rich goes back to looking helpless.
[Help me, sweetie. I'm being attacked.]
'What are you girls doing?!'
"That's not your mom! Bitch is going to die for what she's doing to you! FURY BLADES!"
Cadence rushes in slashing in all directions. Spoiled Rich moves in and out with a widening smile with each miss until Cadence fires a magic beam at her face.
[Argh! I'm innocent! They're trying to tear me away from you, Diamond!]
Spoiled Rich rolls on the ground as Cadence keeps stabbing her with both blades.
'STOP!'
DT uses TBDRLIATU to stop Cadence's swords.
"DT you're not seeing what I see!"
'I see somepony trying to ruin my time with my mom!'
Pushes Cadence's blades to the side and TBDRLIATU turns into a power hoof.
'PROTECTION PUNCH!'
She punches Cadence in the chest sending her grinding on the ground.
>Wait, we're your friends DT!
'You WERE my friends.'
Spoiled Rich makes a snarky smile.
[My little hero...]
>>27400959
>DT's first interactions with 42 and 77 She tried to kill 1 because she was a changeling and the other held a knife to her throat.
And she wasn't friends with either of them right away, she went back and talked to 77 again to show him she wasn't afraid and he took a shine to her. He didn't like her at all at the start, but he warmed up to her when she managed to get past all his traps he set for the guard and reset them enough to use on 42.
Likewise, 42 hated her at the start, but when she saw DT was doing this to protect her hometown and willing to blow herself up, she connected with her due to knowing what it's like to put your life on the line as a child in service of your home, something that came up again in her talk with Applejack post Fillydelphia Rumble.
> And before you throw Spike in all he would have known prior is the CMC hate her and she has a rocket launcher.
And that she saved Applebloom's life when she was being abducted before he even had a single conversation with her.
That was kind of a tipping point.
>I really think DT not just winning the exchange was most of the problem
Then you're being paranoid about criticism and coming off like you're hiding away from a fault in the story by just waving off said criticism as 'only because a character didn't "win'.
>I missed the part where DT wasn't a bitch in the threads between GC formation and Blueblood's arc and befriended them
Correct, you did. You missed their intial meetings, DT saving Applebloom and later Big Mac and all of Sweet Apple Acres(This is why she stopped shooting 56), you missed the weapon swap, DT still being so scared of 77 at the first 'meeting' she nearly wet herself in terror before she eventually overcame it, them fighting against the straggler robots together, which is why the A-team formed at all, and a bunch of short sillies.
They all met, fought, talked, got to know each other and THEN Spike proposed bringing them all together to make a club.
>>27400969
NC
>Faust
"Craig"
~~~
>...
"..."
>...
"That's a third one in less than a year now..."
>...
"You know this might become a trend."
>...
"Maybe they're will be a whole city of Immortal beings and mountains of cake, just cake everywhere."
>...
"Ok, I'll stop, you're setting planets on fire thousands of light years away."
>...
"That last one had life on it, I mean they we're barely sentient piles of shit, but alive.
>... If she does ONE more, just one she is getting such a spanking her marks ass will be perma-bruised like Luna.
>>27401022
Ohhh, that's not good.
That is nooott good.
>>27401023
Should also be noted DT didn't want to form a club with changelings. It was post 56 shotgun-save against Handydog, but she still didn't like them yet, as evidenced when she shot at both 12 and 29. I don't know if that's what you meant, but the first gunclub meeting had her shaking in fear because 77 was there, and they didn't get along till later. The only reason she stuck around is because she really hit it off with Spike and liked talking to him, and wanted another chance to challenge 42 to make up for her humiliating defeat by punchbug. Spike liked her because she saved Applebloom from being kidnapped, she even got a medal from AJ for that one, 77 was just having fun messing with her, and 42 wanted to challenge her because she enjoyed their fight.
The Daw thing would have gone over waaayyyy smoother if she had met any of them even once first. Pommel should have been there, since he was a member once too.
>>27400959
>consensus is Daw needs to apologize to Diamond.
Fuck that, they're on speaking terms and all that good stuff, Spike let Daw in the club after she apologized, they're not angry or bitter at each other and it was so long ago there's no damn way that this is still a sticking point.
This is something they could, and should, forget.
>>27401022
Oh fuck that's dirty. That is some dirty shit.
She's already dead.
>>27401132
But anon, Daw called her a gobshite once. This is unforgivable.
>>27401149
Don't mix up traits that make people not want to write for a certain character the same as a character flaw or the same as one of the story.
Her attitude was off-putting to that one particular writer, and that's completely fine.
>>27400961
Main idea was this:>Daw trying to get drunk on Canterlot wine in the Gun Club HQ
>DT comes in, asks her why she's doing that (problem 1: Making DT sound like DT, for some reason I either always go over board with the bitchiness but I kept feeling like I was having her hold back far too much to the point of being generic)
>Daw is evasive
>DT says she can get Daw some good booze but only if Daw opens up (Again, can't be too callous, can't be too soft, insert your pachas here)
>Daw admits that while she's never actually got the date down, she starts feeling pretty shit around the same time of year, a feeling she felt when Brahmos killed her mom (Problem #2: We know her backstory, but need to relate it to DT that isn't longwinded but also not a jumpcut. Problem #3: Daw's backstory is pretty fucked up and part of me feels like it has no place in the far less serious mainstream canon, I wrote it back when she WASN'T going to be following Pom back to Equestria)
>Daw drinks in order to numb the feeling but since she's had to see Evergreen and many of her crewmates die just a few months ago, the feeling is particularly strong and the Cantie wine isn't cutting it.
>Daw's only actual connection in Canterlot is Pommel and she's starting to think it's isolating her, the closest thing she has to a friend outside of Pommel being 32.
>Brief agreement 32 is the worst (because self-deprecation)
>>27401305>Daw wanted to join the Club because she figured they'd be something like what she had back on the Regret, but she fucked it up out of the gate and she's not even met a few of them.
>So she's drinking alone in the Clubhouse after hospitalizing a prostitute.
>DT digests this, briefly admits she'd probably be feeling about the same if her mom died.
>Not the no-friends stuff, though, let's not be crazy.
>DT says if Daw wants to really join in the Club, she has to show she's willing to be a team player.
>Daw says she's game.
>DT retrieves a bottle of whiskey from some of Tubbablubbahubbahubba's many compartments, briefly explaining it's in case of a celebration with her 'Mature friends' (aka PD and Gwen)
>Daw does not question this, takes a pull
>And immediately passes out.
>"...Lightweight."
>>27401022
I'm a noob at gimp, but for fun, I decided to do a thing.
>>27401311
Alright then.
>Problem 1Don't have her go full bitch or too low key, considering what just happened this is a perfect time for her to go more of a cocky route. She's feeling on top of the world, she feels like she's the best around, and nothing is going to keep her down. The great thing about this is that you don't have to have her being mean or otherwise abrasive to Daw, in fact she can be downright jovial while still being that DT level of cockiness. Don't make her a little bitch, make her the cocky kid who just won the big game. Don't make her hold back, this is a celebration, let her have fun. It fits her personality and fits your story.
>2/3the audience doesn't need to hear her backstory, and neither does DT. All we need to know for information are the bare-bones basic, her mom died and it was tragic, Daw isn't going to completely open up to her anyway so she doesn't need to know anything more than that for the story to work, and I neither do we. A simple sentence "It's when my mom died", and DT is on the right page, she's not heartless.bonding point is good, stick with it. Maybe throw in a funny story of when Pommel was in the gun club but that's about it.
Basics are there, so if it's easier just try switching it up from bitch mode to Han Solo or something. See if that helps.
>>27401413
>Funny story
..."...son of a BITCH, he STILL OWES ME A FRAG GRENADE!"
>>27401311
These suggestions are good>>27401413, especially the kind of mood that DT would be in, she would be open to trying to get something out of Daw just to get her to party, the only thing I would add is thatyou have a rare opportunity here to have them bond for a specific thing. Most notably, DT also didn't have anybody who really understood her love for TBDRLIATU back in PV, she would get feeling isolated especially up in Canterlot. It'd be more fun if, instead of the 'team player" thing (since this is just a club), have Daw start talking about her sword and all the stuff she wants to do to it, and have DT go off on a rant about all the stuff Tibbledibble can do that's better. Keep the Rivalry, because that makes for good interaction later, but put it on a more friendly term that can really grow from it. It doesn't have to be a fight, and she doesn't have to prove anything to DT, DT just needs a reason to be interested in her like Spike or 42 or 77 was.
>>27400730
I'm only lightly skimming the rest of the conversation, but if you're having trouble I could throw an example story your way if I don't fall asleep. My attitude towards Daw is pretty much "Not my OC, not my problem." But I'm used to writing DT, so I can swing an OoOC if you want. They just need to bond over an activity.
>>27400950
That doesn't mean I can't try and encourage my kid to have fun with yours.
>>27401305
>for some reason I either always go over board with the bitchiness but I kept feeling like I was having her hold back far too much to the point of being generic)
Aw bro, I tone the bitchiness down. In my mind there's more to her personality than being a bitch. When someone only highlights DT's bitch attitude and nothing else, they're not using her full potential. She can bring a lot to the table depending on mood, company, and situation.
Good morning, thread
>>27402285
Good morning, ya Mook.
Gib me type blue Diabetes.
>Daw
"DT"
'Spike'
~~~~
>Geez it's cold tonight.
"It's why we got a fireplace going."
>...I don't remember us having a fireplace.
'We don't...'
>...That is a washing machine drum on top of a wheel barrel. This is really...
'Unsafe?'
>Resourceful.
"Thank you! See Spike? You are a tight ass. I told you this was a good idea."
>I don't see why this isn't a good idea, lad.
'Are you kidding me? This is a fire hazard in the middle of the room!'
>Aren't you a wee bit of a fire hazard with yer' own fire breathin'? Don't you usually breath fire to send messages 'n all?
'Well yeah, but this is-'
"What about the forge for your blacksmithing stuff? That's not exactly safe."
'Yeah it is! It's safety approved! Also why didn't you use that?'
"Because your forge was over there and fixed in place. I wanted mine to be mobile, so I could take it with me to the fridge and stuff."
'That's a terrible amount of effort for your own portable heater!'
>Or a terribly good amount of effort. It's smart.
'Really!? You too! I thought you'd...GAH!'
He walks away.
>...is the lad always this uptight?
"Yeah, probably from the paperwork. It's why we all like to drive him crazy sometimes. Good job picking up on it."
>I didn't. I thought it was actually a good idea.
DT grins.
"...Have some roasted chestnuts."
>Wasn't there a sign that said no roasting chestnuts in open flames inside?
"Yup, have some chestnuts."
>>27403023
>2
"42"
'13'
~~~~
>....
"If you value your life in any form, I'd put it down."
'What? Why?'
"Just trust me, put it down."
>...
'Why is she looking at me like that?'
"You have made a terrible choice, now put it down."
'I just want to-'
"You wants and desires are noted, and discarded. Put it down."
>...
'...Please?'
>Okay!
"W-wh... what!?"
>Then Ah' guess Ah'll be purple this time. Can Ah' be blue next time, though? Ah' wanna be blue.
'Sure, we'll take turns.'
>Yay!
"But... but you always... why!?"
'Why what?'
"Nevermind, why was being blue so important?"
'...no reason.'
>Trust me, Forty Two, ya' wouldn't get it.
"...What?"
>She letcha be blue when ya' really wanted to be, didn't she?
'...yeah, she did.'
>Shiny did too.
'Huh... lucky you.'
>The luckiest!
"...I am so lost..."
>>27403278
Whoops, I forgot the OoOC tag.
>>27403319
Of course 42 wouldn't get it.She never had a mom.
>SA
"Celestia"
~~
>I'm getting my shield ready, just in case.
"What?"
>If this gets out of hoof, I'm making sure nothing happens past Canterlot.
"Shiny, you can't just control everyone. You can't put the Canerlot in a bubble."
>...Yes I can. That is literally something I can do."
"Oh, right..."
>...
"...Our world is weird."
>Little bit, yeah.
>>27403530
SAVAGE
>29
"Sunset"
~~~
>Is there such a reason thou could not simply knock on mine door? Really now, would it be that difficult to give a little ring? Or a note? Or at least not spirit into mine home in the dead of night? You know, on second thought, let us discuss as scholars on the second part, tis an important matter, I feel.
The unicorn's face remained mostly in shadows as she followed the changeling's walk. His meandering as he gathered ice and a rag for his bruised nose held her every attention, even if it was all but impossible to see as cloaked in the dark as she was.
"Come now, Twenty Nine, you know your reputation can't take anymore of a hit. How would your neighbors feel, if they saw you cavort with... criminals-HEY!"
She attempted to slide back, but it was no use. The lamp he had clicked on had illuminated her in full, and left no shadow to hide in.
>What? What was that?
"For someone supposedly so 'refined' you don't get ambiance very well."
>Wh- no! I spoke of the other thing!... And my palette for the intricacies of light and shadow is very refined, thank thee!
"So you say."
He stood still, holding the ice pack to his head in rapt attention to the mare reclining on his spare armchair. He waited as she attempted to shuffle every which way, trying to move back into a look of power and refinement, but seemingly unable to settle on a single position.
Finally, a whole minute into the charade, he could take no more.
>Well!?
"Well what?"
>What does thou mean, criminal!?
"Oh... oh! Have you not heard?"
>Heard of what!?
She chose to forgo further recreational poses, slipping from the chair with a calculated grace and a subtle ease as she slowly began to approach him.
"It seems the princesses have grown... tired of me. For you see, this event with Chitania was not random chance, no, my dear little Twenty Nine..."
Her voice lowered to a whisper, dangerous as it was cold.
"It was planned."
1/6
>>27404223
She couldn't keep the glimmer from her eyes when his own went wide, a surprising rush running through her as the shock sank in.
"It was planned to take her off the playing field once and for all, and me with it. This was no simple bar brawl, it was not Chitania's rage, it was a princess goading her into a fight, and attempting to take us all out in one fell swoop. Currently, there is an arrest warrant out for me, surely you've heard? I am to be caught, dragged before them..."
Her mouth closed in on his ear, letting him hear every breath rolling into it.
"And what do you think is going to happen next?"
She backed off slightly, needing to see the look on his face as it all sank in. Some part of her she no longer felt ashamed of needed to see his world shatter as he came to understand the gravity of those who now stood above him.
She needed to see it.
>...Huh.
At some point, life was going to stop disappointing her, and she wouldn't know what to do.
"That's it?"
>So then, thou needs a place to stay?
At some point, life was going to start making sense, and she just plain wouldn't be able to understand it.
"...come again?"
>Well buying a train ticket would be a touch suspicious, no!... Oh, wait, I suppose I could just do it in disguise. I keep forgetting that is a thing I can do.
She sat there, blinking, as he began to ramble, continually slipping in and out of his 'accent' as he continued on while barely even giving her a glance.
"You're... serious? You do realize that things will probably go worse for you, if I stick around."
He snapped back, giving a prissy little wave of his hoof as he waved her off.
>Bah, the day I let fear into mine heart is the day the darkness consumes mine soul!
"You literally just ran around screaming a second ago."
>Thou art remembering it wrong.
She stared right at the still visible bruise on the side of his head. He pretended not to notice.
2/6
>>27404229
>Not to worry, my dear Enchantress Zecora could likely whip up a disguise or two for thee in no time at all, her potion making skills are unmatched!
"You're seriously going to tell her."
>Well of course! Her mind and Marey's wisdom will doubtlessly aide us in our quest to keep thee from any gaze.
"Really. You want to bring in an elected official, a Mayor who works for the princesses, to help. And you don't see this backfiring."
>Not a bit! Why, in a pinch, I'm sure dear Trixie knows a thing or two about costume design... though I'm not sure if she knows a thing about subtlety. Hrm... all the same, bringing in their aide can only help us!
She didn't know if his smile was that of stupidity, or just plain obliviousness.
"And the reason you don't think she'll just, I don't know, go tell her lords and masters is? Why any of them won't just sell me out when they realize that they'd probably be the next ones 'getting into a bar brawl' if they didn't?"
>So silly, Sunset... they would never do that.
She had never heard words more confidently spoken in her entire life.
>Does thou want the bed, or will I at last have a roommate who will actually take the couch?
Her stare, unending and wide, was her only response.
>...the couch it is.
"No."
He brightened up, and a part of her hated that she had to crush his dreams.
"Not about that, I mean. I mean, no. You cannot be serious."
>It's a nice couch.
"Twenty Nine... I can't just wait for them to come after me."
He wavered, his smug smirk fading away for a second, before it was almost completely gone.
>Oh... are thou sure? They are rather forgetful-
"They want me dead, Twenty Nine."
>You are sure of this? Perhaps they only wish to capture you-
"They blew up a building to get to me."
>Well, who hasn't blown up a building once or twice-
"I'm not going to let them finish it."
The last traces left his lips, and he nodded.
>...Sunset, I cannot help thee to attack the royals.
3/7
>>27404234
"I know... and I'm not going to ask you to."
That had not been the entire truth, she admitted to herself. Depending on his reaction, what he attempted next, she considered not asking him at all.... Or leaving him as he was.
She had been stabbed in the back too many times to let that happen.
>I... you can still stay here, if thou wishes, at least enough time to let the heat of the search die down. Perhaps it will be a nice time for reflection, at that. Perhaps they will see the error of their ways, or we will find a way to show them it without needing anything more extreme.
A response never came from her, not even a twitch of her lips as she looked away, and tried not to dwell on the offer.
>No?... Very well.
He shuffled over, and for a second she felt every single one of her hairs stand up on end in worry he was going to try something.
Instead, he reached up, and plucked a book off the shelf. A massive tome, quite wide and thick, that he carried over to her. She recognized it, a recent reproduction copy of one of the great literary geniuses of the third century. Not particularly rare, and certainly not of any real value, to her current situation or history.
Maybe that's why she didn't feel so bad when he opened it up, and revealed the hidden bottle in the pages that had been cut out.
>...Son of a...
An empty bottle.
"Pffft."
She couldn't help but laugh.
>How does that blasted roommate of mind find my every vice and sweet thing!?
A good, solid laugh as he chucked the book backwards, landing perfectly in a trash bin not far away. Bitterly, he summoned another book holding yet more of the decadent drink inside of it. Thankfully, a full bottle this time.
>Ugh, forced to be degraded to a mere ninth century blend! Might as well be drinking it from a sippy cup!
She chose not to comment on the fact he was so bitter at a bottle that cost at least a couple hundred bits, or the fact he gave it to her with little thought behind it.
4/7
>>27404239
>When we see each other again, I shall have to get thee a better year. But, alas, I suppose thee will have to rough it.
"...Thanks."
>Of course, a refined soul should never have to be without a sweetness to addle the mind on such a time as this! Trust me... it takes the edge of being chased off, just a bit.
His eyes went distant for a second, but no more than that.
>...Sunset, I realize we have not known each other for very long, but perhaps I could ask a favor of thee?
Suspicion, even so late in the conversation such as this, flared up in her.
"And that would be?"
>I realize thou will not... simply let what happened pass, and I would never ask it of thee, but one of them... are thou dead set against every royal, without question?
A simple question, yet she could not help but feel her horn charge and ready magic to fight.
"Yes."
>Even if they never did anything to you?
Her grip on the bottle tightened, and she felt her teeth began to clench. He remained passive, despite the body language of warning she all but spelled out with a neon sign.
"Can you just cut to the chase, please?"
>...I will not ask thee not to hurt her, but... princess Luna is not a dark soul, she is merely troubled. She was down in Ponyville during all this, that I can confirm, she had nothing to do with whoever chose to go at you. She is a little lacking as a teacher... but her heart is in the right place. And, however she may act otherwise... I think of her as a friend. While I will not ask you to not hurt her, for I know she will be swept up in this somehow, no doubt... just go easy on her? She doesn't know anything about this.
The suspicion wavered, and Sunset found herself thinking.
And thinking. And thinking some more, digging deep, looking close, and remembering all she could in her brain that was missing gaps.
"...Huh."
5/7
>>27404245
She could not recall a single time the two of them had actually spoken. She had been on the moon before she left, she had not done anything as she was 'taught' by Applejack, she had not even been there when she had been overtaken by Variolus or been present when she awoke.
She had nothing with the other princess, not even hate. No love, no feelings at all, there was nothing.
"Uh... sure?"
>Wonderful! My apologies for being so needy, but she is a bit of a sort to rush in without thinking, and, well, let me just say mine poor cousin would be quite the mess otherwise.
She felt something that he instantly trusted her, and believed her, without question after that. She didn't know what, but she felt it.
>So... if thou did not wish shelter or aide, why did thou seek me out?
She could hear her brain finally snap back into place as her mind returned to her. Thoughts she had entered the room with finally came back after being lost in her haze of confusion and events unfolding in ways she had not considered.
To only herself, she admitted the full truth. That she had wished to see him react to her after her admission, that she wanted to see just what it was he would do. She needed to see what he would do, and what he would try. She didn't know why, but she had to see it.
To him, though she would never admit the whole truth, she could admit a part of it.
"Now, the thing about that is..."
She crept up to him, gently placing the bottle down, and her wicked smile returning once more.
"I do need something from you, specifically."
6/7
>>27404249
He blinked owlishly as she drew closer and closer, until she was almost directly before him in no time at all.
>And... what is that?
He could no longer see her smile, as she finally reached close enough he could only see into her sparkling, impish eyes.
"...I need love."
She breathed deeply, letting every word roll off her tongue.
"A lot of love. A... lot. Will you give it to me?"
>...okay!
He would never know why she facehoofed at his blank nod and simple shrug, and groaned when he held out his hoof for her to take.
>What?
She groaned, reached over with her magic, and turned out the light.
>...oh.
She was not leaving here without love.
>...thou does know I only have to hold thine hoof, right?
"Let me be mysterious, damn it!"
>>27404255
BOW CHIKA WOW WOWWWW
>AJ
"Celestia"
~~~
The crowd was roaring, having gathered in no time at all after she had called them. Canterlot was nothing if not a city that loved it's assembly, after all.
"Are you ready for this?"
She could not deny she felt supported right now. Behind her were all her friends sans poor Rarity, her fellow royals, so many she had come to know and love.
Even so, it was a shaky hoof that reached up to her hat, and steadied it for support.
>As Ah'll ever be.
She gave one last look back, and a certain look caught her eye.
"Are you sure you want to go through with this?"
>...Yeah, Ah' am.
A certain, cocky smile, from one she had once called foe.
>We need to fix this.
The sun was shining bright as she stepped out onto the podium, looking over tired or hungover faces of those who had partied a little too hard. They were still smiling, still feeling joy.
She had to take that.
>Citizens of Canterlot... you ain't gonna like what Ah' got to say, but... Ah' gotta be honest.
>>27404255That seems like a good cliffhanger
OMAKE!
>29
"SS"
~~
>...
"..."
>...So did we-
"He's being vague like everyone else."
>Ah... but it really looks like we-
"I know."
>We even talked about-
"I know."
>But would it be-
"I KNOOOWWW!"
>...
"..."
>...I hope we did.
"RIGHT!?"
>>27404285
>>27404301
Well, glad I got that in before Omakes.
OMAKE!
>AJ
"Rarity"
~~
>Well, Ah' think Ah' found the problem with Spike.
"He needs a little more height?"
AIR HOOF!
>...
"...No?"
>...
"I thought it was clever."
>...He needs ta'-
"Unleash the dragon!"
AIR HOOF!
>...
"Stop leaving me hanging."
>...He needs less o' you.
"Jerk."
UNLOCK CHECK!
>While Applejack investigates, Rarity airhoofs on reflex!
HEYOOO!>>27404327
>Fluttershy finds her chickens stripping!
>and of course puppet fanservice!
Damn it, Cloudchaser!>>27397672
>Berry Punch is really creative with her bottles.
DAMN IT CLOUDCHASER! >>27389321
>Octavia rocks on with a flamethrower cello and rides on Vinyl's speakers.
GOD FUCKING DAMN IT CLOUDCHASER>>27389985
>Flitter also works on her glutes.
GOD DAMN IT, er... CLOUDCHASER'S SISTER! >>27360168
>Pennydrop is suddenly distrustful of Gwen when she mentions she's not big on coffee.
She shows her distrust as any would, with open munitions. >>27390378
>Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon didn't even notice the CMC was gone, but oddly enough they congratulate them.
With cards! And money! Rich pony congratulatory! >>27381006
ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCK, CLOUDCHASER/DERPY MVP!
>>27404255
Well, at least they're still friends.
OMAKE!
>SA
"Chrysalis"
~~~
>So are we ever going to get back to my thing?
"Sorry, Shiny, Applejack has taken over."
>...fucking bug gets laid but I don't?
"We're in omakes, soooo-"
>This doesn't count!
"That's what Cadence said after your last time, HAH!"
>...fuck you buggo.
"We are in omakes, so-"
>NOOOO!
>>27404354
And quite a lot more than that!
OHHH MYYYYY!
>>27404327
Ouch! Sheesh.
Omuku
>32
~~~~
>SON OF A BIIIIITCCCHHH! BULLLLSHIT BULLSHIT BULLSHIT BULLLLLLLLL SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
>>27404344
Derpy/CC really did just wipe out the PP's didn't they?
I love it.
>>27404382
Ha ha!
Worst ling gets no love.
>>27404393
That's what happens when you have a great comedy duo.
>>27404376
Honesty hurts.
OMAKE!
>SA
"Derpy"
~???~
~~~~~
>...You know what? This is fine.
He settled in deeper into the bed, the mare on his chest rubbing her cheek on his sweat caked, matted fur.
>This right here? This is totally fine. I like this.
"I got so many stories."
>You did, and I'm happy for you.
She sighed, running a hoof along his chest.
"Can we just stay here forever?"
>You know what?...Why not? I don't even know what I was doing anymore.
"Trying to pop my bubbles, is what you were doing."
She gave a flightly laugh and he joined her, reaching over to feel his hoof marks on her cutie mark.
>But seriously, this whole thing... why was I even doing it? I don't know anymore and I don't care. How's about you and me just sit back... and stay right here.
She propped herself up slightly, enough to look at least one of her wavy eyes into his.
"You... you mean it?"
>Yep.
"Oh, that would be... wonderful."
She settled back down, and sighed into his chest.
"We could just do this, forever."
>And do it all over too!
She giggled, licking her lips.
"I wouldn't mind that at all."
>Yep... lets just call my journey to an end. This is finally... the end-
~NOOOOOOO!~
Reality shook, the world all but crumbled, and the skies split open.
~YOU CAN'T QUIT NOW! I WON'T ALLOW IT!~
>AH HAH!
1/2
>>27404465
Gently, he pushed the mare off of him, rising to point to the newcomer issuing a challenge.
>I knew that would lure you out!
"Oh... so you didn't-"
>I knew if I just pretended I gave up, you would come screaming!
"But we did a lot of-"
>And now... I have you! The one behind it all, the one who sent me on this journey, the one who made this happen! FINALLY! I HAVE YOU! THE FINAL BOSS, AT LAST!
"...so can I go now, or-"
~So... you aren't as dumb as you look! Very well...then it is time we really did end your journey! You've found me, but you won't be able to stop me!~
>IT IS TIME! You and me... I shall defeat you, my most hated foe! I SHALL DEFEAT-
~~~~"Oh, wow, even I can see this cut to black is bullshit."
>>27404468
So wait... who gets screentime next thread?
Hey guys, what's going on in this thread-
>See's post count
FUUUUUCK!
Okay, I know it's a little early with over five posts left, but I have to leave in like no time at all, and I don't want to hoist off making a new thread on someone else, so I'm going to make it a little early before I gotta go!
New thread shortly!
>>27404489
NEW THREEEAD... for whenever this one dies! >>27404496
>>27404327
And then AJ just dropped a few points down in my book. That was pretty assholeish of AJ.
>>27404344
https://www.myinstants.com/instant/achievement-unlocked/
>>27404840
You gonna make it with the prophesies?
>>27404938
I admit, I'm half brain dead and just want to take a nap right now. I just need a thread summary and think of 1 or 2 background ponies to mention. Maybe even something for Tank and Opal since I haven't highlighted pets.
>>27403791
Just realized we could have called the characters we had in Canterlot "The Canter Lot"
>>27405056
>AJ finally finds the truth and she's coming clean!
And mention Doctor Whooves or The flower trio.
Pinkie Preview
>Pinkie
~~~~https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHSRbD_69yk
>AJ finally finds the truth and prepares to make an announcement!
>Winona takes a bite outta crime. Gummy can pop out of unexpected places. Owlicious is too delicious for this. Opal wears a lady bug suit. Tank runs an errand. Angel Bunny gets hold of a plunger. Harry the bear keeps some kids from playing with matches and try to say only you can prevent wildfires. Find out what happens next time on thread 140: Apple Announcements...and of course peeping fanservice!
