I am going away for a little while, don't miss me too much.
>>8129299
I would never hit you mom.
Misery loves company and I am so very lonely.
BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK
I'll write this and hand it to you then we''ll go drinking and laugh. It will be a good day.
You're all to blame for this. Fuck the world. Anahi gets my books when she turns 12. The rest of you can piss off. Sry mom.
i tried to meditate on giving myself a heart attack to make it seem like an accident but it didn't work. to my mother: wfodfirgm, to my father: efjnlgvkm4vltefm.
Tp the world !!!!
xDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD
TOPTOPTOPOTOTPOT EBEBINEIBN
HEHEHEHEHEH GUD LIFE BRO WHERE'ES IT GONE, DUNNO, HAHAHAHAAH NOOOSEEEEE IN THE NECK HAHAHAHA
you left the toilet seat up
Quod erat faciendum
>>8129315
spit my tea out desu
It'll be too late by the time you read this.
Hey fuckers. Judging by the body hanging from the wall you probably know what this is, so I won't waste your time. What's your favorite jerk-off techniques? Do you prefer rubbing it or yanking it? I've left some space below so you can leave your answer. Personally I've always enjoyed jerking off while standing up. It sounds weird, but believe me, it's fun. When you're done mourning, you should try it sometime.
388hdh927di pej@@DFHhdhm
Jdhdyh738hdhfhnc dhdudhnh 098371718(2717&) wi= uehdv
Why are breakfast food breakfast foods? Like, why don't we have curry for breakfast?
I mean seriously: How did scrambled eggs get stuck with breakfast exclusivity? You can put bacon on a sandwich without anyone freaking out. But the moment your sandwich has an egg, boom, it's a breakfast sandwich.
My name is not important. What is important is what I'm going to do ... I just fuckin' hate this world. And the human worms feasting on its carcass. My whole life is just cold, bitter hatred. And I always wanted to die violently. This is the time of vengeance and no life is worth saving. And I will put in the grave as many as I can. It's time for me to kill. And it's time for me to die. My genocide crusade begins here.
I was born and now i will die. So what?
>>8129299
no note is the only way to go you teenagers
"And Richard Cory, one calm summer night, Went home at put a bullet through his head."
This world couldn't hold me.
I am going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call it Eternity
BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK
I'm so happy!
Aha! happy go lucky me!
I just go my way,
Living everyday!
I don't worry!
Worrying don't agree,
Things that bother you,
Never bother me!
Things that bother you,
Never bother me
I feel happy and fine!
Aha!
Living in the sunlight,
Loving in the moonlight
Having a wonderful time!
Haven't got a lot,
I don't need a lot
Coffee's only a dime
Living in the sunlight,
Loving in the moonlight,
Having a wonderful time!
Just take it from me,
I'm just as free as any daughter.
I do what i like,
Just what i like,
And how i love it!
I'm right here to stay
When i'm old and gray,
I'll be right in my prime!
Living in the sunlight,
Loving in the moonlight,
Having a wonderful time!
Just take it from me,
I'm just as free as any daughter.
I do what i like,
Just what i like,
And how i love it!
I'm right here to stay,
When i'm old and gray,
I'll be right in my prime,
Living in the sunlight,
Loving in the moonlight,
Having a wonderful time!
I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch, to wrap my arms around her and sleep. Not fuck, like in those movies. Not even have sex. Just sleep together in the most innocent sense of the phrase. But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend and I was gawky and she was gorgeous and I was hopelessly boring and she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on the bottom bunk, thinking that if people were rain, I was drizzle and she was hurricane.
ONE NOTHING WRONG WITH ME
TWO NOTHING WRONG WITH ME
THREE NOTHING WRONG WITH ME
FOUR NOTHING WRONG WITH MEE
My non-theoretical suicide note, which I plan to send by email.
"By the time you read this, I'll be dead. I'm grateful for the time we spent together, but losing you was the worst thing that ever happened to me. The pain was too much so I decided to kill myself. I wish you all the best."
I'll put it on delay send for a few days so I can cancel it if the attempt fails or if I chicken out. I don't really have anything to say to my family or anyone else so I won't leave a physical note. It's not very long but I feel like I've basically covered everything in our previous conversations anyway.
>>8129891
boo fucking hoo, loser. get that noose tight.
>>8129896
I'm not looking for sympathy. I've spent a lot of time researching knots so the noose should be fine.
>>8129902
>I'm not looking for sympathy
That's what every attention seeking faggot says when he posts his dirty laundry on 4chan expecting people to care.
Just do it. You've already made another person disgusted with your pathetic life. The more time you waste, the more will follow suit.
>>8129913
I'm going to sedate myself with some drugs to make it easier but I won't have them until later on in the week. You're just going to have to be patient, I'm afraid.
Everything in this world is imperfect
Therefore this note is imperfect
Goodbye
Finally, some peace and quiet.
>>8129920
dont kill yourself pls
>>8129891
They don't deserve this, you faggot.
>>8130016
Jokes aside, killing yourself isn't worth it.
I wrote this in December and spent a long night staring at it in a laundry room. I've felt better in the months since but this was one of my lowest points.
"I am not happy. I don't think I ever have been happy. All my life I looked around and saw people who were happy on accident, people who felt happiness effortlessly. I think being depressed is something like being deaf. Something holds me back and prevents me from feeling the way they feel. I can tear at it and yell at it and ignore it and shed tears for it but I can never remove it.
This is not anyone's fault. It was a very selfish decision. Paul and Anne and Mom and Dad and Jeanne and Bob loved me, and I loved them. Omar and Gibson and Sierra and Tony and Santa Cruz and Mitchell loved me, and I loved them. I wish I could do this without hurting all of you. If anything, this furthers the fact that I was always a bad son and brother and friend and person.
I wish I had been a good person. Everything I did and said was an effort to be a better one, to get closer to that. I never made it. I was surrounded by good people all the time, but I never lived up to a single one of them.
I was also a bad roommate, but I think a rule somewhere says that since I'm dead Auryan gets an A in all his classes. I am sorry for causing you as much trouble as I often did. Someone can use the white paint and paintbrushes I left to fill in the holes in the ceiling left by my poster. Or just tell Housing that a dead man made them.
I have a lot of regrets. I wish I had been in love with someone. I wish I had seen much more of the world and met many more people. I wish I had contributed something great that would give cause for me to be remembered. I wish I had more and better ideas for art. Seeing a person smile at something I made is the best thing I ever felt, but I was never creative or skilled enough to continue all of that.
Most of all I wish I had the willpower to keep looking for happiness and not give up like this. Maybe one day I might have found it and realized everything was worth it.
But I am not strong enough to continue looking.
I cannot hold my breath anymore.
Maybe that proves I deserved this the whole time."
Easy, easy easy easy.
>>8130020
it is for me
>>8130057
good luck mate. life has no meaning, so it's equally meaningless to kill yourself. good luck though, just make sure you dont half ass it and end up a vegetable. i'm sure i wont be too far behind. none of us will.
>>8130034
I'm a fan.
>>8129299
"After my suicide attempt failed and I ended up in a hospital, with my family and friends at the bedside: I regained consciousness, but they didn't notice, and still talked about how fortunate my survival was. Some scolded me or called my a fool, but with such relief in their words that i couldn't be happier. As I woke up, recovered, found a job, they didn't left me: father, mother, Jerry and Paul. When I got published, they cheered, a problem child finally turned adult - well, then came the money, and love, not as a consequence, perhaps as a cause. The rest is not that important, but you can conjure the picture."
>giving a shit
>>8130085
honestly i'm too scared to ever do it. i wouldn't be unhappy if it happened to me, though
>>8129299
"The rope finally claimed a worthwhile author."
Life seems to be a black and white silent movie about nothing, flickering silently on film superimposed onto the retinas of my eyes.
The movie is almost over.
>>8130175
same with me m8... im pretty sure i have cancer though, so if i play my cards right i should be gone soon
>>8130329
really? that's sad anon. i honestly hope you don't.
life will never end the way this picture represents.
I miss myself
I'm not gonna try and get all sentimental about this, I've never been much for talking about feelings. The truth is life's been fun and life's been shit. I guess for me the shit outweighed the fun, I just hope this doesn't spoil every good memory we have together. Maybe I'm a coward for taking the easy way out, I hope some of you can forgive me for it.
there's such a pressure for the last words to be something substantial, I just don't have anything substantial to offer. guess that makes this goodbye.
>>8129299
Why kill myself now when there are so many things coming that will probably do it for me? I was reading that all the cocaine I used to do may give me a heart attack by the time I'm 50. I think a lot more of violence and strife is going to come into the world and if I still feel like offing myself there will be plenty of opportunities in a few years. What's the rush?
-Suicide note found in a park in Fuknega prefecture-
To who it may concern.
When i was a small boy, i caught glimpse of the
spirit realm. I saw the ghosts busting their
spooky nuts on everything and everyone; and
they laughed, and were jovial at the fact of
our unawareness to their mischief.
They looked at me; looking at them.
They began to laugh, and they spoke
amongst themselves: ''Look, that one
can see us''. After this, i lost
the ability to see into the world
of the spirits. And i lived my life
and i was no different from anyone
else. But this was merely a farce.
For as i sat and looked upon my
friends, my family, and all that
i knew. I knew, i always knew;
The spirits were nutting on everything
that i held dear.-------------Goodbye.
Why kill yourself when you can just not care. Ive successfully brought my level of caring to minimal values and life has essentially been unlocked. Not in a yolo sense or fuck it sense but like a fuck you and me both sense.
"Fuck off"
>>8130833
So i assume you've had suicidal thoughts before?
What exactly do you mean by ''not caring'', not caring about what specifically? Maybe you're mixing up ''not caring'' with giving up.
>>8130870
Yeah thats more apt
Sorry.
I saw the best minds of my generation starving, hysterical, naked, dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix, angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night, who poverty and tatters and hollow-eyed and high sat up smoking in the supernatural darkness of cold-water flats floating across the tops of cities contemplating jazz, who bared their brains to Heaven under the El and saw Mohammedan angels staggering on tenement roofs illuminated, who passed through universities with radiant cool eyes hallucinating Arkansas and Blake-light tragedy among the scholars of war, who were expelled from the academies for crazy & publishing obscene odes on the windows of the skull, who cowered in unshaven rooms in underwear, burning their money in wastebaskets and listening to the Terror through the wall, who got busted in their pubic beards returning through Laredo with a belt of marijuana for New York, who ate fire in paint hotels or drank turpentine in Paradise Alley, death, or purgatoried their torsos night after night with dreams, with drugs, with waking nightmares, alcohol and cock and endless balls, incomparable blind streets of shuddering cloud and lightning in the mind leaping toward poles of Canada & Paterson, illuminating all the motionless world of Time between, Peyote solidities of halls, backyard green tree cemetery dawns, wine drunkenness over the rooftops, storefront boroughs of teahead joyride neon blinking traffic light, sun and moon and tree vibrations in the roaring winter dusks of Brooklyn, ashcan rantings and kind king light of mind, who chained themselves to subways for the endless ride from Battery to holy Bronx on benzedrine until the noise of wheels and children brought them down shuddering mouth-wracked and battered bleak of brain all drained of brilliance in the drear light of Zoo, who sank all night in submarine light of Bickford’s floated out and sat through the stale beer afternoon in desolate Fugazzi’s, listening to the crack of doom on the hydrogen jukebox, who talked continuously seventy hours from park to pad to bar to Bellevue to museum to the Brooklyn Bridge, a lost battalion of platonic conversationalists jumping down the stoops off fire escapes off windowsills off Empire State out of the moon, yacketayakking screaming vomiting whispering facts and memories and anecdotes and eyeball kicks and shocks of hospitals and jails and wars, whole intellects disgorged in total recall for seven days and nights with brilliant eyes, meat for the Synagogue cast on the pavement, who vanished into nowhere Zen New Jersey leaving a trail of ambiguous picture postcards of Atlantic City Hall, suffering Eastern sweats and Tangerian bone-grindings and migraines of China under junk-withdrawal in Newark’s bleak furnished room, who wandered around and around at midnight in the railroad yard wondering where to go, and went, leaving no broken hearts
>>8130935
who lit cigarettes in boxcars boxcars boxcars racketing through snow toward lonesome farms in grandfather night, who studied Plotinus Poe St. John of the Cross telepathy and bop kabbalah because the cosmos instinctively vibrated at their feet in Kansas, who loned it through the streets of Idaho seeking visionary indian angels who were visionary indian angels, who thought they were only mad when Baltimore gleamed in supernatural ecstasy, who jumped in limousines with the Chinaman of Oklahoma on the impulse of winter midnight streetlight smalltown rain, who lounged hungry and lonesome through Houston seeking jazz or sex or soup, and followed the brilliant Spaniard to converse about America and Eternity, a hopeless task, and so took ship to Africa, who disappeared into the volcanoes of Mexico leaving behind nothing but the shadow of dungarees and the lava and ash of poetry scattered in fireplace Chicago, who reappeared on the West Coast investigating the FBI in beards and shorts with big pacifist eyes sexy in their dark skin passing out incomprehensible leaflets, who burned cigarette holes in their arms protesting the narcotic tobacco haze of Capitalism, who distributed Supercommunist pamphlets in Union Square weeping and undressing while the sirens of Los Alamos wailed them down, and wailed down Wall, and the Staten Island ferry also wailed, who broke down crying in white gymnasiums naked and trembling before the machinery of other skeletons, who bit detectives in the neck and shrieked with delight in policecars for committing no crime but their own wild cooking pederasty and intoxication, who howled on their knees in the subway and were dragged off the roof waving genitals and manuscripts, who let themselves be fucked in the ass by saintly motorcyclists, and screamed with joy, who blew and were blown by those human seraphim, the sailors, caresses of Atlantic and Caribbean love, who balled in the morning in the evenings in rosegardens and the grass of public parks and cemeteries scattering their semen freely to whomever come who may, who hiccuped endlessly trying to giggle but wound up with a sob behind a partition in a Turkish Bath when the blond & naked angel came to pierce them with a sword, who lost their loveboys to the three old shrews of fate the one eyed shrew of the heterosexual dollar the one eyed shrew that winks out of the womb and the one eyed shrew that does nothing but sit on her ass and snip the intellectual golden threads of the craftsman’s loom, who copulated ecstatic and insatiate with a bottle of beer a sweetheart a package of cigarettes a candle and fell off the bed, and continued along the floor and down the hall and ended fainting on the wall with a vision of ultimate cunt and come eluding the last gyzym of consciousness
>>8130947
who sweetened the snatches of a million girls trembling in the sunset, and were red eyed in the morning but prepared to sweeten the snatch of the sunrise, flashing buttocks under barns and naked in the lake, who went out whoring through Colorado in myriad stolen night-cars, N.C., secret hero of these poems, cocksman and Adonis of Denver—joy to the memory of his innumerable lays of girls in empty lots & diner backyards, moviehouses’ rickety rows, on mountaintops in caves or with gaunt waitresses in familiar roadside lonely petticoat upliftings & especially secret gas-station solipsisms of johns, & hometown alleys too, who faded out in vast sordid movies, were shifted in dreams, woke on a sudden Manhattan, and picked themselves up out of basements hung-over with heartless Tokay and horrors of Third Avenue iron dreams & stumbled to unemployment offices, who walked all night with their shoes full of blood on the snowbank docks waiting for a door in the East River to open to a room full of steam-heat and opium, who created great suicidal dramas on the apartment cliff-banks of the Hudson under the wartime blur floodlight of the moon & their heads shall be crowned with laurel in oblivion, who ate the lamb stew of the imagination or digested the crab at the muddy bottom of the rivers of Bowery, who wept at the romance of the streets with their pushcarts full of onions and bad music, who sat in boxes breathing in the darkness under the bridge, and rose up to build harpsichords in their lofts, who coughed on the sixth floor of Harlem crowned with flame under the tubercular sky surrounded by orange crates of theology, who scribbled all night rocking and rolling over lofty incantations which in the yellow morning were stanzas of gibberish, who cooked rotten animals lung heart feet tail borsht & tortillas dreaming of the pure vegetable kingdom, who plunged themselves under meat trucks looking for an egg, who threw their watches off the roof to cast their ballot for Eternity outside of Time, & alarm clocks fell on their heads every day for the next decade, who cut their wrists three times successively unsuccessfully, gave up and were forced to open antique stores where they thought they were growing old and cried, who were burned alive in their innocent flannel suits on Madison Avenue amid blasts of leaden verse & the tanked-up clatter of the iron regiments of fashion & the nitroglycerine shrieks of the fairies of advertising & the mustard gas of sinister intelligent editors, or were run down by the drunken taxicabs of Absolute Reality, who jumped off the Brooklyn Bridge this actually happened and walked away unknown and forgotten into the ghostly daze of Chinatown soup alleyways & firetrucks, not even one free beer, who sang out of their windows in despair, fell out of the subway window, jumped in the filthy Passaic, leaped on negroes, cried all over the street,
>>8130960
danced on broken wineglasses barefoot smashed phonograph records of nostalgic European 1930s German jazz finished the whiskey and threw up groaning into the bloody toilet, moans in their ears and the blast of colossal steamwhistles, who barreled down the highways of the past journeying to each other’s hotrod-Golgotha jail-solitude watch or Birmingham jazz incarnation, who drove crosscountry seventytwo hours to find out if I had a vision or you had a vision or he had a vision to find out Eternity, who journeyed to Denver, who died in Denver, who came back to Denver & waited in vain, who watched over Denver & brooded & loned in Denver and finally went away to find out the Time, & now Denver is lonesome for her heroes, who fell on their knees in hopeless cathedrals praying for each other’s salvation and light and breasts, until the soul illuminated its hair for a second, who crashed through their minds in jail waiting for impossible criminals with golden heads and the charm of reality in their hearts who sang sweet blues to Alcatraz, who retired to Mexico to cultivate a habit, or Rocky Mount to tender Buddha or Tangiers to boys or Southern Pacific to the black locomotive or Harvard to Narcissus to Woodlawn to the daisychain or grave, who demanded sanity trials accusing the radio of hypnotism & were left with their insanity & their hands & a hung jury, who threw potato salad at CCNY lecturers on Dadaism and subsequently presented themselves on the granite steps of the madhouse with shaven heads and harlequin speech of suicide, demanding instantaneous lobotomy, and who were given instead the concrete void of insulin Metrazol electricity hydrotherapy psychotherapy occupational therapy pingpong & amnesia,
who in humorless protest overturned only one symbolic pingpong table, resting briefly in catatonia, returning years later truly bald except for a wig of blood, and tears and fingers, to the visible madman doom of the wards of the madtowns of the East, Pilgrim State’s Rockland’s and Greystone’s foetid halls, bickering with the echoes of the soul, rocking and rolling in the midnight solitude-bench dolmen-realms of love, dream of life a nightmare, bodies turned to stone as heavy as the moon, with mother finally ******, and the last fantastic book flung out of the tenement window, and the last door closed at 4 A.M. and the last telephone slammed at the wall in reply and the last furnished room emptied down to the last piece of mental furniture, a yellow paper rose twisted on a wire hanger in the closet, and even that imaginary, nothing but a hopeful little bit of hallucination— ah, Carl, while you are not safe I am not safe, and now you’re really in the total animal soup of time— and who therefore ran through the icy streets obsessed with a sudden flash of the alchemy of the use of the ellipsis catalogue a variable measure and the vibrating plane,
you're all garbage and literally everything is bullshit. how could anyone live like this for more than a second? don't you people have any dignity?
>>8130966
who dreamt and made incarnate gaps in Time & Space through images juxtaposed, and trapped the archangel of the soul between 2 visual images and joined the elemental verbs and set the noun and dash of consciousness together jumping with sensation of Pater Omnipotens Aeterna Deus to recreate the syntax and measure of poor human prose and stand before you speechless and intelligent and shaking with shame, rejected yet confessing out the soul to conform to the rhythm of thought in his naked and endless head, the madman bum and angel beat in Time, unknown, yet putting down here what might be left to say in time come after death, and rose reincarnate in the ghostly clothes of jazz in the goldhorn shadow of the band and blew the suffering of America’s naked mind for love into an eli eli lamma lamma sabacthani saxophone cry that shivered the cities down to the last radio with the absolute heart of the poem of life butchered out of their own bodies good to eat a thousand years.
>>8129876
>>8130085
Your ideas are logically sound, but you guys are still retarded. I may want to die often, but I'm holding out just in case my temperament changes later. Def will suicide when older though whenever I realize that I'm done. Still lots of sweet shit to do, however.
>>8129299
Delete my hard drives.
>>8130057
At one time you were soo sure your relationship would work that you invested all these feelings into it. Now, however, you're soo sure that its all over. Sounds like you're prone to overconfidence. Wouldn't it be shit to be wrong for a second time all because of her? Lel.
Anyway, if you realize that you're likely wrong about a lot of things and just stay patient, you'll be better than you were before the shit relationship. In Siddhartha when he feels totally fucked, he remembers to think, wait, and fast. I highly recommend it.
But you're probably just doing it to get back at your ex. You should just send her and everyone else the email, then take a two week vacation to Thailand to have sex with whoever you like. Then come back and be like PSYCHE faggots.
>>8131166
I think you're confusing this guy with me. I'm the one who is going to send the spiteful email to my ex and I always capitalize at the beginning of sentences. Yes, it's mostly to get back at her, but I also have bipolar disorder, so suicide is something I've thought about a lot and even attempted (tepidly) a number of times. This is the time that I intend to do it right.
>>8130034
I'm happy you're here today to share this, you made me smile. You love that or what? You should let go of your regrets, but don't forget about the content. It sounds like you haven't even become yourself. Afterall, what's a life where all your passions are kept inside?
>>8131174
And yes, I considered the possibility of just telling her I'd killed myself and disappearing for a while, but I genuinely do want to die. At this point, I don't see myself as having any other choice.
I have been beholden to others for too long. I do not want any of this. Fare well, or not at all.
I never thought I'd die alone
I laughed the loudest who'd have known?
I traced the cord back to the wall
No wonder it was never plugged in at all
I took my time, I hurried up
The choice was mine I didn't think enough
I'm too depressed to go on
You'll be sorry when I'm gone
I never conquered, rarely came
16 just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn't wait to get outside
The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over we'd survived
I couldn't wait till I got home
To pass the time in my room alone
I never thought I'd die alone
Another six months I'll be unknown
Give all my things to all my friends
You'll never step foot in my room again
You'll close it off, board it up
Remember the time that I spilled the cup
Of apple juice in the hall
Please tell mom this is not her fault
I never conquered, rarely came
16 just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn't wait to get outside
The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over we'd survived
I couldn't wait till I got home
To pass the time in my room alone
I never conquered, rarely came
Tomorrow holds such better days
Days when I can still feel alive
When I can't wait to get outside
The world is wide, the time goes by
The tour is over, I've survived
I can't wait till I get home
To pass the time in my room alone
this ride stopped being fun a long time ago and i wish to get off posthaste
jaja da har man kasta inn håndkleet :p
>>8131174
How old are you? I'm 31. Bipolar, too. Have (had?) other diagnosed psych troubles, but who cares. I think you shouldn't do it because you never know who may encounter you, or who you may encounter. I realize that with every suggestion there's a permeating "who gives an absolute fuck? It really doesn't matter". However, years ago I postponed my own suicide because I realized that this same such permeating sentiment applied to my own suicide as well. This allowed me to realize that I was just tired of feeling nothing, or sad, or misery, or lonely. Worse, I would get mania and be on top of the world sone days, prepared fully to accomplish whatever I'd decided to do that day. Of course it failes everytime. Of course gf pointed to my failures. Made me to feel like an inauthentic fraud of myself whereas prior to being with her my only aim was to try my best and see where it goes. Anyway, the realization I had gave me leverage to forgive myself, my ex, and the world for just a moment. The understanding that I really don't know shit about myself or the world saved me.
I'm reaching out this way because I remember days long past where I'd lay in bed and desperately wish someone would talk with me. I wished for someone. A friend, a lover, someone to help me feel okay. They didn't come. Then I stopped wishing because I'd grown to feel that I didn't deserve such a wish granted even if it were offered. I grew ashamed for wanting to survive, and even moreso for wanting others to help me survive. After nobody came, I was disgusted with everyone. I surely had no purpose here helping anybody. Almost decided to murder the ex but didn't bc simply didn't care enough. Anyway, we're not friends and may never be so, but I'm reaching out this way simply to put my hand on your shoulder for a moment to maybe help you remember to honor that part of yourself that at one point felt rightious toward being helped, cared for, loved, etc. I guess I just know that arbitrary feel and wouldn't wish it on anyone.
After the realization I had, I started doing off the wall shit to try to feel better. Shit that before I would have laughed at. Went to churches of all sorts, prayed, did dmt, did magic rituals, fasted for a week, volunteered at old folks homes, studied meditations of all kinds, let a dom girl fuck my ass (it was awful bro.), started reading, and did yoga. The reading, yoga, fasting, and mindfulness meditation stayed because they really made me feel well. They all made me feel like less of a burden, and more of somebody who could help or somebody who was worthy of help. It changed my life in the most embarassing way to the point where I'm writing this to you.
Sorry for getting in your business like this, just want to be that hand for you that wasn't there for me.
>>8130689
This is fucking gold
>>8130972
Good riddance.
I'm a mad memeing man and I've memed just as much memes as I can
Meme me on the other side
"Goodbye.
I'm going to kill myself but if you're reading this then that must mean I already did but there's no reason for me to point that out considering this suicide note is near my dead body over there on the ground with a knife sticking out of my cranium and into my branium and I say that I only want to write this note in the fashion of the one who wrote that novel with tortillas so I shoved a knife in my head because I knew that this note would only fail in providing this necessary condition of writing in this certain way while also using many words and unfortunately I failed to use many words and just repeated a bunch of simple words but that's only because I don't feel like editing this note or anything so if you're still reading this then something must be wrong because you should have called the police and read this letter now or maybe you are reading this now at a later time period after you called the police though I would not be able to tell because I can't tell the future and my abilities are unfortunately limited to only predictions which I am not good at.
Hello."
"Kill yourself.
t. the murderer"
"Feed my corpse to black people so they can absorb my power and have the IQ of whites."
"Hey."
Dear Mother,
Now, I'm not saying that I'm doing this just because you didn't buy me the iPhone I wanted for my birthday. All I'm saying is that if you had, my net happiness would have certainly been higher and, well, who knows how things would have turned out.
Food for thought.
>>8130034
That is a very good note, anon. You are a good writer.
Before I went to college, I intended to be the most amazing English professor in the world. (Like the one I had in highschool, but with tenure and hotty groupies.) During college I wanted the same. During gradschool I wanted the same. And I wanted it very seriously. Many, many sacrifices were made towards this purpose. It worked. I became incredibly fast witted, well read, and intellectually potent. For nearly eight years all I did was read, study, and ignore the world.
However, in that time, colleges -- along with their rates of pay, hire, and tenure -- turned to absolute shit. It was shit before, but it became absolute shit while I wasn't paying attention.
Brilliant people with ten year long college educations, years of sacrifice, and loads of debt are being paid less and less. They're now just adjuncts thrown around for their dispensibility. They're some of the people who care and understand the most about others, but they often don't make enough to even afford a decently modern life.
I tried to do it. But the student body in Los Angeles grew to be apathetic and careless. It was largely made up of foreign students; so many that they simply began to make these classes easy to pass for non-native speakers.
As a rule, if a student does their work on time and shows up, entirely non-passing essays now must pass with a B. Otherwise your dean will contact you and remind you that because he must please the board, you must please him.
Anyway, my fire has burnt out. I sell cars now. I make six figures. I have a BMW. I have three girlfriends. But none of this is as sweet to me as passionately engaging text with other like minded people. However, this becoming less and less possible to do while leaving your dignity and self respect intact. So, here I am cold on the floor, now. Clean this shit up and give my BMW to whoever wins teacher of the year award at Pasadena City College this year.
>>8131348
get the fuck out of the anglosphere, faggot
>>8131361
Yeah, am considering. No idea where to go, however. Really, my spirit is just busted.
Dear Sirs,
As I think of something to write I am reminded of how I spent most of my life: sighing, listless, almost on the cusp of action but never quite breaking the threshold. I have never done anything of real significance purely from my own agency. Instead of following the voice stirring in my heart, I gave into what other people expected of me or followed the easy, beaten road to success. My death is hardly tragic because I never really lived. I have failed.
TOODLE LOO! PEACE OUT! DEUCES!
-anon
"It's no big deal. Have fun and do good. We'll talk later."
I can't live like this anymore.
I'm sorry, dad.
Mom, stop fucking drinking.
>>8131389
Vietnam. It's the new South Korea which was the new Japan.
>>8129407
Your suicide letter consists of the first few sentences of a mediocre and forced Jerry Seinfeld bit. That's pretty sad.
lets see how it goes
-someone
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cg__WAY_J2Q
>>8131908
thats pretty deep
>>8129299
Fuck you all
>>8131872
your suicide letter is a response to a joke demeaning it :( I'll miss you guys, I didn't mean to write this
>>8131872
It's from a John Green book. You gotta keep up with all the memes, man.
>>8131243
Thank you for your heartfelt reply. I desperately tried everything I could after she left to deal with the loss -- meeting new people, casual sex, drugs and alcohol, psychiatric help, throwing myself into work, getting back into my old habits (including meditation and reading), even hospitalization -- but nothing has made any significant difference. I feel like all the time I stick around is just putting off the inevitable. I am beyond help at this point, but again, thank you for trying.
>>8129315
11/10
>tfw no gf
>>8129407
They have curry for breakfast in India.
t. been to India.
>>8130034
one of the only ones worth a damn
>>8130182
no it didn't you hack
>>8130634
i like
>>8131243
>let a dom girl fuck my ass (it was awful bro.)
>I realized that this same such permeating sentiment applied to my own suicide as well. This allowed me to realize that I was just tired of feeling nothing
i like you, you're a bro
>>8130689
>tfw no spooky rape that turns consensual
>>8131348
:\
mine would be something like:
>to know the language of all things beautiful and good, but be mute in it, has been my personal hell. my soul rejects all this in favor of base pleasures and profane imaginations. i will never live up to the person i know i should have been, and i lack the vigor and virtue to try.
mom, dad, i'm so sorry for the heartbreak. brothers, live well and carry your burdens with a smile. friends, thank you for the experiences and i love you all. i wish things could be different.
>>8129299
Don't cry Dani, it isn't your fault.
It never was
>>8129866
John Green?
>>8130085
>life has no meaning, so it's equally meaningless to kill yourself.
People like you drive me mad. You do realize that for most people, it's not a question of it being rational? It's about ending the suffering that you can no longer stand. It's not done out of boredom or ennui, it's because life is, literally, painful to live for them. How hard is that to understand?
Everyone has their reasons for it, but claiming that it's "irrational" and thinking that it will change anyone's mind is stupid.
I was going to make a post chastising those who posted ironic notes, but then I couldn't resist one myself (it's only slightly ironic, there's some truth in it):
"Dear mina-san, ever since I've realized that I won't live to see a world without capitalism, I have seen my life for what it is: a very long wait for something that will not happen. Hence my decision to stop waiting, immediate today."
>>8132082
Don't do it please, I love you anon. Will buy you an ice cream cone, bro. Be my friend instead of dying.
Goto South America for an ibogaine ceremony. It's severe and insane and scary and you'll throw up for a week around shamanic dudes but it you'll return to me babe.
My head hurts.
My many thoughts have borne in me inaction - I am crippled, thus broken. I have been that way for most of my life, but nonetheless: must not something be broken, so that it may be remade? Carlyle said that a man lives by believing something - not by debating and arguing many things. I, the Prodigal Son in metaphora, have immersed myself in thought - when I left that sunny shore, I cannot say, but I threw myself into the shallows of convention. From there, I swam further down until I reached those unfashionable and murky depths - wherein lurk the monsters of taboo. Inevitably, that swimming turned to sinking - which, really, was little more than going backwards, even if involuntarily. I did not lament the slander. I was, as Nietzsche said, the man who was in fact preparing for - "a great leap." And so I surfaced, in the hope that I might find the 'one thing' that Carlyle spoke of; Kierkegaard's 'truth that is true for me.'
Those halcyon days are gone, however. I see now that I must go...beyond. I leave those waters now behind me, as I did the sandy beach that was my youth. Farewell.
>>8132834
Hallucinogens helped me keep positive and happy for a long time, actually. It was when I stopped doing them that the depression and lack of motivation and so on started to come back. I would try acid again before I go if I had the money. Also, I make a terrible friend because of how much time I spend depressed and uncommunicative.
>>8132843
If you don't kill yourself, you might become a decent writer one day.
Want to take that chance?
>>8132854
I'll buy you some acid bro.
By imposing the mode of death, one supersedes the deity thus becoming god
ayy lamo dont go on 4chin they made me dew it
rip
been thinking about this alot lately, so ...
Im sorry for the hurt this may cause,
I held out for as long as i could.
simple apology nothing more needed
>>8131348
Kek, I'm a student at a nearby college, but have friends that go there. The way you describe how school is set up is entirely true, even I can see that as a student. It's a benefit for me as I'm beginning to lose any drive I had.
>>8129299
I don't think I would ever leave a note, I think there's too much of a finality in that. I will probably take a train to somewhere far away on the opposite side of the country and blow my brains out, so nobody will be able to identify me. My note would be simple burial instructions: Cremation and scattering my ashes in the nearest river. Then probably some philosophical meandering that will make my mystery all the more appealing and interesting than I actually am as a living person.
>>8133902
Never leave a note for my family and friends*, that is.
Miss me yet?
>actually leaving a suicide letter
that's so tacky
>>8130194
Utter shit
like death man, suicide, holy shit i'm excited! like death of the author, am i right, right? no, no that wasn't it. something something bananas, no dude i couldn't do that i still owe you a you or a me to me or - no wait what was that? what was it, god damn my memory is bad, like real bad - definitely something to do with 'em ol' bananas. where was i - where am i now? johnny boy once whispered he was a sorry wee lad i have no idea what he mean but the wine was good, right? did i ever have a mother or a father or a priest or a daughter? where did it all go and who the hell took it, not the wind nor the sea nor the old creature i used to call wife - that bitch stopped brushing her teeth too long ago - something something SEX! no i can't derive any pleasure from the ol' intercourse anymore, yeah a botched cock - no not of my own doing - sure, why not! now where was i? where am i now? a noose? now that's a cliché, okay i'll one up you and slit my wrists, yes - au jus! - what a fancy french way to go, oui, they'll set up a l'arc de triomphe in my name no doubt me and my ol' Brain Partners T.P and O.M, yes rest in peace and void and darkness, where ever that could be - in the ground! thank you and good night
>>8129299
Hey, I'm leaving.
You'll join me eventually. Just take your time and enjoy your journey.
Love,
R.
As becomes apparent from any longitudinal study of the likely order of things, I am a phenomenon whose greater affinity rests far more with nonexistence than its opposite. So long to this experiment; I wish the best upon all who survive me.
>>8129299
I'm a disappointment to myself. I have never tried hard enough and I've never had to work hard. I am unfit for this world. I never thought I had enough balls to even kill myself but at least I will only disappoint everybody this time.
on this piece of paper i leave a message written by me, who will no longer be animated by the soul in less than a moment after having written it. shitty shitty nigger nigger fuck penis dildo.
I wish
That I could turn back time.
Because now the guilt is all mine.
Can't live without the trust of those you love.
I know
You can't forget the past.
You cant' forget love and pride, and because of that it's killing me inside.
See you soon. Alternately, thanks Mountain Dew.
>>8133044
No you won't.
>>8129299
>Don't blame yourselves. There was nothing you could have done to prevent my suicide. I just wanted it to end already.
you killed me first
>>8129330
That's a really cute suicide note Anon.
haha, I ate mexican ...
I died as I lived, dead inside.
i'm tired
>>8130689
>to who it may concern
Rest of it is perfect except the nutting part. That seems out of place.
>>8131223
This is shit. Where's the change? Why does tomorrow suddenly hold much better days? Describe the event that changed your mind telling us you changed your mind. Fucking kill yourself.
>>8131277
Enjoy your life as a vegetable.
>>8135201
I really will if there's some feasible way to wire you the money.
please don't look at my porn. i've labelled the folder 'pornography' because i figure it's better that way than you accidentally stumbling across it when searching through my old pictures and documents looking for answers. you don't want to look at it, just delete it, trust me on this. you won't find any closure, just lots of shemales. i've said too much, gotta go
The New Year's grated yams were delicious. So to everybody, goodbye.
2/10 would not live again
Guys if you ever kill yourselves, don't leave a note.
Chances are the coroner will know it's a suicide and pass it off as an accident anyway to spare your family the guilt and shame.
t. used to work forensics
Sorry.
>>8135431
Classic.
>>8130575
Schizo? Psycho?
Or just something you found great ?
its not worth it
>>8135448
I never understood why people feel at all responsible when those around them kill themselves
Note:
Is living life as a happy slave better than dying?
No
>>8129309
dadasedasdasdaszd
Mom and Dad, I love you both very much. You gave me everything a son could ask for. I only hope you can forgive me. I'm sorry.
Dear friends and family,
I just got a paper cut writing this.
It's a start.
Love,
Anon
>>8130034
Great note anon. Not one of those 'omg are you me' faggots but you put into quite beautiful words some of the ways I've felt in the last few years. Glad we're both still here.
I just feel like anyone who commits suicide is a bit of a mug. You're missing out on a golden opportunity to be an absolute madman IRL. If you're at the point where you're going to kill yourself, you've got nothing to lose, right? So go fucking nuts. Try coke, meth and heroin all at once. Steal a sports car. Projectile wank off the top of a skyscraper. Rob a casino. Commandeer a ship and sail the high seas as a fucking pirate. The only thing holding you back from all this is fear of the consequences, but if anything happens, you were going to end it all anyway so who gives a fuck?
people come people go dont mind another hobbo
>>8135793
You don't understand the mental condition of someone driven to suicide. Suicidal people have trouble summoning the energy to take showers or walk outside, let along any of the crazy shit you describe.
>>8135806
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDii69YCh_QYou're both wrong.
I regret nothing.
maybe you guys would be less suicidal if you didn't insist so much on melodrama.
>>8135806
As someone who was suicidal, became a minor madman and was subsequently no longer suicidal, I can tell you that this method works.
>>8135793
That isn't how depressive suicide works. It's the opposite of vitality. And in most cases it isn't the wish to die that pushes them over the edge, but the thought that the world would be a better place without them.
At least for people with MDD. i.e. Bipolar people do exactly what you say and then crash hard. And each crash is worse than the last.
Oh and then there is suicide amongst the elderly. Many people don't consider this. They quite literally believe that they have nothing to live for anymore and just want to be done with it.
Suicide is a quite interesting topic. One that I feel hasn't really been explored in all its nuances. Especially in /lit/erature, motivations tend to be either existential dread or tragedy. Or an unexplored plot device to give other characters motivation/development.
Who was that contemporary nihilist who went absolutely bananas, thinking he was some kind of existential messiah and then hung himself on a stack of his own unsold books again?
I think he was German. Sometime in the 90s, if I'm not mistaken.
Buy diapers
talcum powder
milk
bottle
None of this needed, baby is dead
What ive done
Erase myself
Cross out what ive become
>>8129407
Nice TFIOS reference.
Some friends of mine tell me that they fear their dreams. That they repeat night in and night out and end in cold sweats and gasps for air -- but not mine. I yearn to sleep at night and my dreams are so vivid. They're free and adventurous and every morning I wake up wishing I could stay just a few moments longer, and each night I lay my heavy body down, eager to discover what waits for me beyond the waking world.
I'm so tired.
I love you all so much but I'm collapsing under the weight of my own ragged breath. Each day I struggle harder for air. I have to force my body to move against its own weight, and that's no way to live.
So please, meet me again in your dreams. However you remember me, hold that person in your heart and I can be there every night for you. I'll wait in mine for you, and we'll go on an adventure.
>>8129315
Ya'll keep this up this might be my new bored haha
I should've gone farther with everything. Now I'll always be that one weird kid that everyone knew surfed the chans instead of that jock who fucked tons of bitches
It was me vs. the universe, and the universe was beating me down.
No funeral.
>>8136197
Edgy
"Jokes on you guys; hell is the absence of god - with one stroke I condemn you all."
- the god of beauty and greatness, whose love for himself was only superseded by a hatred of all of you
I wish someone had just told me the truth right up front, as soon as I was old enough to understand it. I wish someone had just said: “Here’s the deal, Wade. You’re something called a ‘human being.’ That’s a really smart kind of animal. Like every other animal on this planet, we’re descended from a single-celled organism that lived millions of years ago. This happened by a process called evolution, and you’ll learn more about it But trust me, that’s really how we all got here. There’s proof of it everywhere, buried in the rocks. That story you heard? About how we were all created by a super-powerful dude named God who lives up in the sky? Total bullshit. The whole God thing is actually an ancient fairy tale that people have been telling one another for thousands of years. We made it all up. Like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. “Oh, and by the way … there’s no Santa Claus or Easter Bunny. Also bullshit. Sorry, kid Deal with it.
They found me. Burn everything. Don't trust [indecipherable]
>>8130034
>I cannot hold my breath anymore.
Damn, sneaky feels please stop.
>>8129299
They would be more proud of me if I didn't leave one
Sorry for the spanish, something this personal needs to be written in your native language.
Si algo me ha mantenido tirando del hilo de la vida fue la curiosidad por el mañana. Como es de suponer tal cosa no posee la suficiente fuerza vital como para mantener a un individuo aferrado a la necesidad de vivir.
Hoy, al levantarme, astiado ya de la monotonÃa, vencido por el aburrimiento, he decidido irme.
Un abrazo a todo aquel que lo quiera.
No funeral
>>8137359
>Hoy, al levantarme, astiado ya de la monotonÃa, vencido por el aburrimiento, he decidido irme.
Underrated suicide letter
Esa frace "he decidido irme" suena tan estoica 10/10
Neither black or white,
Nor the warm heat,
Or the cold breeze blown with complaint or cry;
And I don't belong to you anymore.
>>8130535
How could the tree fly a kite? That's some dumb shit
I printed out CP and swallowed them before killing myself. You have 40 minutes to cut them out of my gut and burn the paper before the police arrive and arrest you for the CP.
"Always give it your best shot. Never give up without a fight." I find these types of lines to be inspiring. The hero facing down evil despite the danger, refusing to give in to defeat. Doggedly standing back up no matter what. And the hero triumphs in the end. But it's never that easy.
I think I can say I've done my best. I lived my life as well as I could and I only have you to thank for that. I've picked myself off the ground so many times now but I think i've hit my limit. My will is sapped. My body exhausted. I don't think there's more I can do.
Thank you for being there for me, it's meant a lot. I hope you don't cry... I think I'll miss you brother, but don't you dare join me.
I know it's cheesy as fuck, but these types of things pack more feel when they're not hypothetical.
I promised myself I'd never do this, but if it takes my death for you to realise I'm gone, then so be it.
Sorry. I couldn't wait any longer.
sorry mama i'm sad all the time
>>8137191
nice
>>8137185
What if god is the universe itself?
If that's the case, didn't god actually do all the things that the religious scholars claim he did?
Is it even possible to not believe in god?
Would that make idealism an ideology of heresy?
Maybe we actually are all children of this god.
Just as an apple is a child of the apple tree.
If this universe is my god then god is cruel and I no longer wish to continue god's expression.
Fuck....
>>8129299
Ma, pa, you were not guilty of this but, seriously, fuck this world.
>>8131223
Fuck off Adam.
I regret that I was unable to serve the purposes of the Construction in a more complete manner. No further action I can undertake will significantly impact the probability of success, but I trust those who hold my dream in their thoughts and strive to accomplish it. To occupy this body any longer would be unnecessary self-denial. I will see you all in the Machine. Do not mourn me, I am not dead.
Please god none of you blame yourselves. I am a broken person. There is nothing any of you could have done. I feel guilt for everything I do or don't do. If a handful of 5150s couldn't help I don't see another one doing any good.
Love you Mom. Love you Dad. Love you Carter. You were the best family a person could ask for. Please try to forget about me.
I was happier in my honest melancholy than I was was in forced levity.
I'm sorry I couldn't bear another minute of it. Sorry mom, sorry dad. I'm just so fucking tired. I'm tired of regurgitating a simple glass of water like it's poison. I'm tired of needles everywhere in my body. Chemo is not working and we know it. I only regret not being able to go away so you wouldn't have to identify my body.
Tell Leo I love him, and sorry for being a shit brother.
Skate or die
>>8129315
lmao
>written in crayon
hell be fine
>>8130935
RIP Ginsberg
>theoretical
Y-yeah, haha...
>>8131911
I love you.
"I know this is late to the game but I saw Bridesmaids recently and it was really bad. Why did everyone tell me to see it?"
This wasn't the place for me, I'll try somewhere else.
>>8137185
Ready Player One
>>8135386
I know this is bait but that's a Blink-182 song, but it is shit.
>>8129299
It was a choice, death should always be a choice.
If you're reading this then the stench from my old corpse has signaled for help much better than I ever could.
>>8129920
Killing yourself because of a up.
You really are a massive faggot.
What did he mean by this?
>>8131180
>mfw this faggot couldn't stop replying to anyone who gave him attention
>revealing that incredible desperation to be noticed
>revealing that you are an incredible attention whore who will never kill himself, only fail so people might not be bored with you for day
lol gonna die
>>8143307
People always make this claim but I think of many far easier ways to get far more positive attention. I'm not sure exactly what it about admitting to suicidal thoughts that makes others so contemptuous and hostile.
Checkmate."
mum & dad
i am so sorry
i know how much this will suck for you. i love you so much and most of the good things in my life are due to you and i don't blame you, there's nothing you could have done other than having been wonderful caring supportive loving parents, which you were. i'm so sorry, i know this is going to fuck you up
i just don't like living. i haven't for as long as i can remember. there's good bits, and bad bits, but the overall experience is, for me, a negative one. i have nowhere to go, nothing i want to do. it's a fucking exhausting chore i have to do every day and i just want to rest. i don't see a future for myself that isn't just more fucking grind into the endless future and i don't want that.
please believe that this is what i want, that this is a considered decision and not a spur of the moment mistake that could have been adverted. i've finally got to quit and my only regret is the pain it's going to cause the living.
love
anon
u guys r gonna die too lol
>>8130085
Schope's Suicide Hotline, is that you?
>>8145047
>i know how much this will suck for you
have you lost a child?
I welcome the nothing.
>writing a suicide letter
shiggy
>>8129386
underrated
I am skipping to the good part
Sometimes, sometimes I think I was happy. That's without going to say that... That... Fuck it, I lost my train of thought there. But I have come to an impasse and in all honesty I feel no more desire to continue on. It's not so much a matter of fact at this point it's more of a... Fuck it I keep forgetting what I want to say. Well I guess here it is easy enough. Nothing in my life is wholly wrong but I just don't care. I'm bored, I really am. I've always believed there's something else. I'd like to know who I'm going to be next. It's been fun... It has... I'm sorry Azalea. I miss your brother and I know you'll miss me but I'm far too selfish in this moment so... Cheers!
I sure hope none of you struggle too hard without me. It is meaningless for me to complain about my situation, but clearly it was not bearable. Do what you wish with my corpse, I do not care for it.
kinda threw this together, would like some criticism.
I spent my life emulating. Poorly. I was always in want to mold myself, shape myself; create myself - but I never could. Lacking the ability, the drive or the inherent qualities of someone great, I sunk. I sunk into the pale darkness of my room, up at hours where I muttered weakly "good morning" to the birds. I gave up. On being someone great. On striving for something more than sarcasm and distance. I was hollow, not in the sense of unfeeling, but in the sense of inauthenticity.
What was it like to be?
I only knew pretending. The night when pastel orgy filled the sky, when I confronted my reflection in the bay's dark water and shattered that smooth image, that was the night I was honest. I was no one. An imitation of passing figures. An ephemeral emulation of whatever grabbed me that moment. I wasn't pretending to be someone else - I just wasn't anyone.
"When man gazes into the abyss, the abyss gazes back"
I made the mistake of gazing inward. And when I did, it wasn't a monster that drove me to this, it was the void.
>>8129420
>genocide crusade
>>8129866
>she was endlessly fascinating
what woman?
>>8129891
Faggot. You will probably pussy out as soon as you hit send.
>>8129299
I spent my life inside my head, and now it's over.
I'm sorry
>>8146369
Alaska Young
>>8146231
>kinda threw this together, would like some criticism.
if you'd stopped there, it was going to be the best suicide note in the thread. after it is just trash
>>8129920
Make a thread when you do faggot
You could become a legend and at least have some worth
>>8130034
I'm glad you are still here anon.
That was beautiful and tragic
>>8145021
this is my post and it's underrated
>>8129986
That will make the person judging imperfect and hence the decision is imperfect. But your work .. nobody really knows what it is . It will be what they feel it is.
To anyone who cared about me, we shall meet again.
My life was good, I enjoyed it throughly, but I'm done, I've finished what I've come to do, this life became more of a limitation rather than an experience from which to learn. So I carry on, farewell.
>>8137403
"Frase", you sick fuck :^(
>>8133967
>not getting your suicide letter tattooed on your back
>>8135715
Underrated
I'm sorry
I love you <redacted>
mom get away from dad
>>8129626
This. I tried to kill myself far too many times (first being 12). I usually wrote a note, read over it, cringed, ripped it up and threw it in the trash. Every fucking time too.
>>8131145
r u me?
>>8129299
Sorry about the mess.
