You can choose only one:
>you will never again be able to own a gun
>you will never again be able to touch anyone in a sexual or romantic way
The bottom line is pretty much how far would you be willing to go to keep your guns. Which is more important to you, sex(or love) or guns?
I was thinking about this and it is a tricky one. The likelihood that I'll ever actually need a gun for defense is somewhat low, and I really only own guns for fun and "because". If it only affected me and other people still got to keep their guns I'd probably go with it since it would only affect my rights. So as far as I am concerned sex trumps guns.
>>30064892
> implying I'm not already living the "no sexual contact " scenario
>>30064892
>Not having both with the gun
>>30064892
What if someone's touching me, like I'm the passive participant?
>>30064892
>how far will you go to keep your guns
I'll shoot you and then I don't have to make your stupid decision, that's how far
OP should not ask /k/ to choose his felony pleas for him.
However, I would rather stay off the sex offender registry.
>>30064902
I don't get laid very much. Nowadays all my sexual contact occurs via furry roleplaying on omegle. Good enough for me.
>>30064902
I know them feels.
>>30064939
What? Can they actually do that, tell you not to have sexual relations with willing adult partners? The shit?
I get pedos and such, but no sex with anyone seems rough.
>>30064902
>>30064892
>I have my guns
>I will never again be able to touch anyone in a sexual or romantic way
It is better to die for the Emperor than live for yourself.
I still serve.
>>30064983
>>30064951
>>30064902
This.
I'll be 25 in two months and I have never even kissed a girl.
To be brutally honest it sucks pretty goddamn much, but I never complain or show it to anyone. No one even knows.
>tfw want to talk about it with someone but can't because that would fuck up my credibility
>>30064969
Nigger what
>>30064920
OOPS I FELL AND MY DICK SLIPPED IN SORRY GUY
>>30064902
>iktf
honesty, im over halfway to wizard status and any kids I would ever have would be born autistic and diabetic because of my shit genes.
>>30065005
No they can't do that. But they can make it illegal for you to go near a school in US. I'm nit from the US but I know the law is the same in this regard as it is in my country.
Source: I am not allowed to be closer than 200 meters to a school without a valid certifiable reason
>>30065212
So you're what, 18? (IIRC wizard wasn't 'till 30, right?)
I'd say you aren't a lost cause.when you get past 20 still a kissless virgin, the possibility of having intimate relations with anyone quickly whithers away.
And you know the best part? The reason you're still a virgin loser is not in the society, women, evolutionary psychology or anything like that. The reason is you. You fucked up. You were a coward and didn't try enough. You put yourself down.
It fucking hurts but I stopped giving myself excuses and admitted that I fucked up. It sucks, because I'm still not going to do anything about it.
The older I get the less reasons I find why someone would ever want to be with me.
t. >>30065065
>>30065317
Are you me?
>>30065317
>First kiss at 20
>Still no GF
There's hope r-right?
>>30064892
>own guns
>let your lover do the touching
Excellent. Get good, faggot.
>>30065065
Guess you better hire a classy escort for the girlfriend experience and fuck her. Maybe that'll jump start you enough to get off your ass and start making an effort once you know what you're missing out on.
>>30064892
Where do you think you are?
>>30065407
>this entire thread
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxGRhd_iWuE
>>30064892
I've been with more women than I can count. To the kissless anons all I can say is it gets to a point where pussy is just pussy
I don't even like sex anymore it's more of a chore now
I'd give up anything for my guns
>my qt3.14 3d waifu has an excellent gun collection, some of which she keeps on my side of the bed
t.pic related
>can't cordon the g. gordon
>>30065065
tfw want to provide comfort and support but am secretly glad there are others out there worse off than me
>>30065065
Dude, just go out of your comfort zone, find people, talk them up and eventually fuck. Or install tinder and cast a wide net. Nail a whale.
I'm a foreveralone, so I'll take option two and keep my guns.
Not like I know what I'm missing.
>>30065537
Just b urself
Ive missed my chance at 25 of ever knowing intimacy with a women so I guess guns will have to fill the hole in my heart.
I have a lot of missed opportunities in my life though so theres that. Where did all the fucking time go? Just a year ago I wasnt sweating it because I felt I had plenty of time and now here I am reconciling with the fact that I fucked up and missed out.
>>30066005
yeah because no 25 year olds ever fuck
>they fuck constantly
>>30064892
I can have more kids with modern medicine even never touching someone sexually. I'll just 'bate and keep my guns.
>>30064902
this. why are these threads allowed?
>>30065228
Story?
>>30066021
Not when youre 25 with the romantic expierence of an awkward 16 year old boy finishing puberty.
People at 25 have been fucking girls for sometime
But they dont start fucking when theyre 25
Yea I'll have to take the guns. I've been laid and did the whole gf thing for a while, but once that ended I just lost interest.
May as well devote my time to something that I enjoy and which challenges me instead of someone who just challenges me and uses me. The moral of the story being- there is such a slim chance that I will find a worthwhile long term relationship, that having a guarantee of some pleasure in my life (guns) trumps being caught in a revolving door of shitty women who don't care about me.
Buy guns lads. They'll never bail on you in the long run.
>>30066388
My niece, who was 13 at the time, was in a coma like state for few weeks. The family was taking turns watching over her during the night just in case she got convulsions (they were poor and couldn't afford 24/7 medical care, only daily visits). They asked for my help.
It would have bee just fine but I got really horny. Hadn't fapped in days. Decidedto fap in the room since there was no one there and the girl was pretty much in a coma. One thing lead to another and I kind of did things with her. Did it on two other occasions.
Got caught because as it happens, people in the coma like state or whatever she was in can be semi-lucid at times. Also I accidentally bruised her a bit and almost messed up the tubes that were in her throat when I was putting them back in. She remembered some of it and they took samples inside her and compared it to my DNA. Case closed.
>>30066840
lol
>>30066840
Fucking Shinji.
What if my touching my guns is sexual?
>>30067203
>implying it ever wasn't
>>30067164
Was fun at the time, not gonna lie.
>>30067195
What? I am not Japanese.
>>30066840
loooool wtf
I'm flat out unable to get along with people. I've tried, believe me. Not much, but I've tried. Gave up about 2 years ago at 21. Had a coworker with a big crush on me a few months back, but ignored her because she's a basic bitch. Yeah, I know I'm the problem for being the odd one who can't empathize or trust other people, but at least I can act the part.
I'll get to spend all my money on what I want, won't have a chance at losing 50% of my property and a portion of my income for life, won't have to deal with bullshit drama or anything. I don't think its so bad. In 5 years since turning 18 I've spent around 12 grand on guns and gun accessories and paid my way through college.
>>30064902
This. Guns win by default.
>>30064892
>you will never again be able to own a gun
>put guns in trust
i win
>>30064892
Well, I live in New York City, so...
>>30064892
GET LOST HOES
ITS OPERATING TIME
>>30066840
Dude.. why the fuck?
My dick is telling me to ask you to describe what you did to her in detail, but my brain is telling me to close the browser tab and pretend I never had this erection.
can I borrow guns indefinitely?
is it a legal prohibition on guns or a magical one?
if it's magical and I can't borrow guns then I'd have to choose gun ownership. weaponry means a great deal to me.
>>30064892
You're asking me to pick between being a young adult in America or a young adult in Europe OP.
>>30065317
I was a kissless virgin til 20.
25 now and I've slept with 18 women and had a girlfriend for about 2 years a while back.
Could be worse.
>>30064892
We're still allowed to touch our guns sexually, right?
so guns or neither?
guns it is
>>30065513
In life there are only ones and zeros, do and do not, as long she was alive recently and has a hole between her legs, I'll be fine
>>30066840
You should be fucking ovened.
Guns over Girls
why?
Because a Gun won't take your kids and half your shit, a gun won't leave you. A gun won't cheat on you behind your back.
Guns aren't lying sluts
>>30064902
>>30064916
I came here to post both of these. Good job guys.
>>30064892
>The bottom line is pretty much how far would you be willing to go to keep your guns. Which is more important to you, sex(or love) or guns?
SHALL
>>30067924
>he trusts his guns
I slap the shit outa my HK, and abuse my AK to keep em in line.
>>30066840
>>30064892
In a SHTF situation, a gun is going to be a lot more useful than a 120 pound meat bag.
>>30067975
YES
BUT CAN YOU STICK YOUR PEE PEE INSIDE OF IT
>>30067995
If you try hard enough, sure.
>>30067969
to be fair asuka is an irresistible semen demon
>>30068003
>>30064892
I pick never be able to own a gun. Then I have a son with pic related and buy him a gun, and her a gun. I don't own it but I can use it.
Checkmate.
>>30065228
Anon... what did you do?
>>30064892
>touch anyone in a sexual or romantic way
>anyone
I can still touch my guns in a sexual way.
They'll never betray me.
>>30068389
>>30067753
Fine.
I mostly played with her mouth. She had a tube going down her throat but it was small. My dick is a bit above average in length but rather thin, so even though I've hated it all my live it was god send here. I didn't go full Facial Abuse on her but I did get it in pretty far and fast. The thing is, the throat was surprisingly roomy in that relaxed state when I tilted her head back. The mouth itself was meh since she had a brace thing jolding her tongue (choking hazard).
Never went all the way vaginal. Barely got a finger in. Got the tip inside the ass with some cooking oil and time but that was about it. Came instantly once it was it. I just mostly had fun with the throat, kinda wanked my dick between her ass cheeks or used her hand to masturbate etc.
If I were to do it again I'd use different lube. This was in the early 00's (I was sentenced in 02) and back then cooling oil was all you had in my town.
>you will never again be able to own a gun
Every day is a gun owning day.
>you will never again be able to touch anyone in a sexual or romantic way
I never do this anyway.
Or does this mean that if I choose the obvious option I won't be able to touch my funs in a loving, romantic or sexual way?
>>30065157
welcome to the future
Saved
>>30064902
>>30064892
I, as a diagnosed sex addict, would pick my guns over touching my woman romantically again. As long as I could be friends and still live in the same house, what evs...id rather have my guns tho.
>>30064892
Easy choice, it doesn't matter what I pick because both are already in effect (please kill me).
>>30066526
This.
I'm 27 and haven't kissed a girl since highschool.
I don't think I could be physically close to another person since I don't know how.
I've been alone for so long that it's the only way I know how to be...
>>30064892
I choose sex. If I couldn't touch a woman for the rest of my life I'd fucking kill myself.
>>30065176
Not what I meant, cuck.
No woman would touch me anyways.
My guns can't say no or run away...
>>30064892
>Implying I'm not already a 32 year old turbovirgin
I'll just keep my guns...
>>30070144
This is a rather depressing thread.
>>30064892
It's like this guy has never heard of marriage.
>>30064892
Id still keep the guns, because I dont have to touch somebody in a "romantic" way, I just need to grope them
>>30070709
Life is generally a depressing journey from birth to the grave.
Finding joy in a few activities and a good friend or two is the best most men can hope for.
Test
This is an interesting dilemma for me, since i:
-am a straight dude with an asexual gf (essentially, a relationship with all the romantic bits, but none of the sexual ones. No hate plox)
-am a noguns (although i do have one being shipped as we speak)
So really i already have only half of both of those things.
>>30065372
are you both me
>>30070709
welcome to k and 4chan home of pain and suffering coated in a nice sugary layer of anime to mask the pain. there is a reason a lot of 4chan users are escapist
>>30064902
This, Never even hugged anyone before desu
>>30070416
What effects does wizardry have on firearms? I'm curious because I've got about 5 years to push.
If I combine wizardry and guns can I do Matrix level shit?
>>30069115
>welcome to /k/
>>30064902
nailed it on the first reply. I'd give you a manly, in no way homo, hug...
>>30064892
Well I cant raep without a gun so...
>>30069731
ahh how cuuute.
him wook sad
>current year
>pussy worth anything
Ever wonder why modern women go to school and build a lifelong career? They know they won't have it easy unless they land a jackpot guy. Baby boomer women had it way easier. Echo boomer women can thank feminism for making them a wage slave.
Of course anyone would choose guns.
>>30065317
> didn't try hard enough
The only way i could try harder would be to rape people. I'm not a rapist.
just rape... it's not about sex, it's about power
>>30064892
>you will never again be able to touch anyone in a sexual or romantic way
Done. Haven't had any since 2001.
>>30072700
What did you get married?
>>30064892
I own a gun now and I've never been able to make a relationship work. I'll take a tit in the hand over two in the bush.
>>30064892
>you will never again be able to touch anyone in a sexual or romantic way
I guess it's already happening...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQAmvKMGUko
>>30066840
Do you know what they do to guys like you in prison?
>>30064892
Can I still go to my shooting club and use the guns there?
Can I keep my air guns?
Is my girlfriend going to stop being a bitch?
>>30064892
Joke's on you OP, I'm a kissless 36 year old virgin with 50 guns.
>>30064892
Sorry guns :(
>>30074677
I was just fine. No one knew why I was there (the law is different here). I served two years and two more in parole.
Also I am not a monster. If all had gone as planned she would have never known about it.
>>30068813
Also that was supposed to be cooking oil not cooling oil.
>>30072740
Double kek
>>30064892
Rifu over waifu
>>30064892
I choose both.
>>30068003
>>30068016
Can we have more of these made?
guns I can buy horse dildos and Mare fleshlights
>>30077469
>>30064892
Since I'm not getting laid anytime soon unless I want to fuck fatties, and I do not want to fuck land whales. I will take the gun.
>>30064892
As I live in the UK and everything I wan to own is illegal, pretty much living the the first category anyway.
Nonetheless: Fuck you.
>>30064892
Do my guns count as anyone?
Because as long as I can molest them I'm good to go.
>>30075814
How the fuck can you claim you aren't a monster? You shoved your cock down the the throat of a comatose 13 year old girl. Honestly if you were in my family there never would have been a court case. There would have been a walk into the woods for the both of us, and then a walk back for me.
>>30077830
Because she wasn't supposed to know it happened.
Duhhhh!
>>30075814
>>30077614
>smells kinda weird
When you're having sex, that sex smell is amazing.
Im 28, married for 2 years going on 7 total.
Avid gun owner 39 guns currently, I like mid to long range shooting 500-1000yd, I reload and shoot very regularly 2 to 3 sundays a month.
Well last year me and my wife lived in London while she completed her masters.
At first no guns isnt that bad because ultimately atleast for me its just a hobby, but over time you realize how therapeutic shooting shit is.
I think i could handle either scenario, but if i was paralyzed or couldnt use my dick and couldnt own guns I think it would be time to leave
>>30078097
Not to me, my wife stopped cleaning her ass quite as well (like after a shit) as she used to before we had kids so it smells like taking a fucking dump when we have sex, especially doggy style, god damn. It's distracting but dat ass keeps me focused on dat ass. So... I still cum but it would be nice if everything smelled like a fuckin victoria's secret or some shit every time we had sex.
>>30066840
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rZ8mdRBs3rg
what
>>30071149
>asexual
No, this isnt the correct term, asexual beings reproduce by themselves, not not at all.
>>30071198
feel human being
and a real hero
This is an easy one ... noone lets me touch them in a sexual or romantic way anyway so guns it is as it ever was
>you will never again be able to own a gun
>own a gun
So I can just get my wife to buy the guns?
>>30078387
There are loads of shooting places around london.
Bisley is like 40 mins out from the centre.
>>30078405
thats fucking gross
>>30078536
It does have an official but secondary meaning:
>does not have a sexual orientation/is completely uninterested in sex regardless of partner/has zero sex drive
>>30065407
No. End it.
>ended up on the other end of the spectrum, a father at 15
Condoms are your friend.
>>30079533
>that's fucking gross
Welcome to marriage. Also women in general.
>there is absolutely nothing nastier on this planet than a >23yo woman that's not actively trying to catch a man
>>30079533
>there are loads of shooting places around London
There are exactly 27 ranges (that are open to anybody other than active duty LE/military) in the entirety of England.
I have more than that just within the official city limits of my city.
>>30079593
Yeah but, surely cleaning one's arse is a fairly standard procedure no matter what the relationship status
>>30079634
>ranges
yeah all right, we have fuck all. Lots of places for clays though..
T-that makes up for it r-right..?
(kill me)
>>30064892
Guns > sex. No doubt
In this thread I learned that it's a bad idea to rape a chick who's in a coma cause she might remember.
>>30064892
So OP is basically asking for advice , he probably has a Gun hating GF with kids telling him she will leave him if he doesn't choose his guns. typical ...
>>30080584
That's right. Always do it to a corpse instead.
>>30080651
Bonus: a corpse is no longer a person so OPs question no longer applies
>>30080651
>>30080963
http://codes.findlaw.com/tx/penal-code/penal-sect-42-08.html
>>30065562
Same
>>30079593
Lol fuckin truth
>>30079895
It's true but let me tell you, having kids changes you man. I no longer judge fat people, like at all. I look at them like "bro, i get it, don't worry about it." Like I was actually in the store last night (want to know my shopping list? Fucking two huge ass boxes of diapers, baby formula, and baby food. Yeah fuck me). Sex is like... the last thing on the list. Both of us look fucking gross now. We used to be tight, hot, sexy, sensual 20-somethings who would flirt and grab each other's crotches in the car and shit and now... we are just giant nasty formless bags of skin moaning in bed. Seriously we have probably gained a good... idk maybe 100 pounds collectively as a couple? It's a good thing I don't give much of a shit, idk how super OCD control freaks handle kids. No wonder therapists have jobs.
>>30079593
but cleaning the shit from your ass is like a basic human thing isn't it? like, it really is.
>>30081798
It is but you can like, be super white glove about it and wipe that shit up like it's nuclear waste, put the paper around your finger and stick it up there and shit... or you can kinda like... lazily give it a little slop with the toilet paper like a quick little dab. It cleans a lot of it but you miss a lot especially in all the little nooks and crannies. I mean I personally clean the living fuck out of my asshole when I shit because it bugs the hell out of me but my wife takes care of the kids all day, it's a wonder she's not institutionalized yet. I know I would be in a fucking straitjacket already.
>>30081824
haha, well shit. cant say i long for that day.
>>30077830
Ditto: pieces of trash like that ought to be scalped and removed from existence
>>30082052
!spotted the fucking injun right here!
