Anti meanie edition
cara
>>53959305
emily
just made a massive bowl of porridge lads
http://bigassmessage.com/8d2f4
crayon pop
ITS OVER
THE EU FEARS THE ZULU
>>53959300
good edition
halo
>why yes m'lady, playing computer games is one of my hobbies
Starting to seriously doubt the gf's taste. Those 'Italian' rolls look shite.
https://youtu.be/awaw0d5G0VQ
Can I stay here until /cum/ wakes up? How was your morning?
Maybe black people just aren't very good actors?
feeling like I'm dying lads
>>53959351
update your antivirus software before clicking this link
>computer games? far too unsophisticated for a superior intellect such as mine
>I prefer to read and consider a variety of right wing political literature
>He didn't have an R4 card for his DS
consider suicide
>>53959401
BLOODY RACIST
>>53959401
>more blacks refuse to go to the oscars
>implying anyone cares
>>53959367
A TANGERINE THE SIZE OF A KEK
>>53959427
>he bought an R4 instead of a DStwo
lmaoin @ you're life
Business idea: selling my body to desperate 38-50 year old milf slags but don't actually charge them anything because I enjoy it anyway
>>53959446
>>53959444
Well they can certainly do melodrama.
going to have an anime weekend
>>53959408
Yeah, I think I still vaguely remember how to clone them desu.
>>53959462
not really sure tbqh
combination of heat and bad sleep I think
>>53959467
A janitor's wage? You'd live like a king.
>>53959401
Chris Rock is going to sabotage his hosting on purpose desu. It'll be a train wreck.
didn't put enough milk or sugar in the porridge so it's like a big disgusting oatcake with no flavour
fucks SAKE
>>53959385
edged it for 2 hours in bed before getting up and coming here tbf
>DStwo
Lads how I open a tin of soup
>>53959467
I'm pretty sure the only women who would consider paying for sex would be too ugly for you to enjoy shagging them.
>>53959385
do we have a choice?
bigassmessage.com/55270
>>53959533
tin opener innit
Could use a ladhug lads, no homo though
>>53959533
put a screwdriver on the edge of the top of the can and hit it with a hammer
>two big official looking letters through the post
uh oh
>>53959540
You overestimate my standards
>>53959543
I wish I was excited about things as much as you.
>>53959533
smash it on the edge of a counter until it opens
>>53959569
419 scammers have upped their game.
>>53959578
then git gud at something
>>53959569
tell us what they are lad
>>53959416
great post. Well done
...
>>53959583
>>53959560
>>53959545
Don't worry lads, turned out I had the tab the wrong way x
Business idea: buy products for cheap from China and then sell them over here for a profit
>>53959515
Did you remember the pinch of salt?
what film should i watch
>>53959633
has anyone ever done a tiananmen >le walking man
>>53959684
Ghost World
>>53959684
Planes 2
>>53959684
Primer
>>53959633
>my depression is worse than your depression
bit pathetic m8
>>53959615
Right, one was a rejection letter for a job I applied for with Cancer Research. They also took the liberty of signing me up to their fucking mailing list.
The second one was from the DWP telling me they're stopping my JSA because I failed to attend an appointment I didn't know existed.
Grand.
Listening to ABBA, lads
>>53959684
k-on
>>53959684
The mummy
>>53959684
jacobs ladder
>>53959699
Yes
>>53959401
They do have some good actors, they're just spoilt. They're overrepresented compared to Latinos, and Asians yet they still bitch and moan.
Good morning lads
>>53959684
The Hangover part 2: this time it's personal
WILLY
>>53959762
glad this gimmick is dying
>>53959684
The Machinist
>>53959732
Unlucky.
>>53959818
Did anyone except me actually fall for it
>>53959684
Akira, Alien, Aliens, Army of Shadows, Bladerunner, Commando, Cross of Iron, Dredd, GOTG, Hero, Last Samurai, Pacific Rim, Plein Soleil, Predator, Ran, The Raid, Seven Samurai, Shame, Starship Troopers, Top Gun, Total Recall, The Tree of Life
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9uAAP3PbkRI
really makes you think
>>53959843
I started it, it's a good film desu
Done a strange dream last night that I was in a Christopher Nolan Batman film. Main thing I remember was that the sound effects design for everything that was happening was amazing. Everything sounded so crisp and punchy.
Made me think I should be an audio engineer or something.
>>53959401
>what is Idris Elba
>>53959957
Ineligable because Oscars don't like Netflix
>7:00
What's a good pocket knife/Swiss army knife every man should own?
just joined a chess tournament
>>53959980
Whole day ahead of ya, lad. Bless up.
1:00pm
>>53960009
>been awake for 12 hours already
just kill me
>>53960006
You smart
What's a good pocket knife/Swiss army knife every man should own?
lads where's the cheapest place to buy frozen raspberries?
swear Yanks get this shit in bulk for pittance
>>53960046
I C E L A N D
What do I put down for references if I don't have any?
>>53960035
>woke up at 1am
Why?
>>53959367
>>53960049
>Don't ignore me you rancid swine
WEW
>>53960042
I fail to see what's so fedora about a man owning a pocket knife
>>53960089
mate how the fuck do people sleep at night i dont get it
>>53959732
SCROUNGERS BTFO
>>53960087
good shout fammo, was thinking farmfoods but they don't have a shop online for some reason
>>53959664
Just buy opium to China like we're buying animu. Japan and Britain can take equal shares of HK and Taiwan.
>>53960101
Absolutely based
>>53960089
ask your mum/dad/other relation to be a fake reference ofc
>>53960123
I forced myself to get up and out of bed at 6am no matter how much sleep I had and eventually I got so tired that I now sleep at 10-11pm every night
>>53960129
Fuck you, never helping you again
Cunt
>>53960042
Leatherman?
I have fireman mates who say Gerber is better but had a wave for 8 years now. only sharpened it first time last year.
Don't fall for the Swiss army meme anyway.
>>53960165
doesnt seem to matter what i do i sleep for 0-3 hours then wake up and cant do shit about it
>>53960184
fuck off the bottom one is literally me
*bangs pilum on scutum*
attend, attend i say, i have a question
haven't listened to anything not from k-on for months now
>>53960217
Go to GP and ask for sedatives. Take them and they should kick in 30 minutes later. Use them to help get yourself in a decent sleeping pattern.
You should also practice good sleep hygeine. Give this a read
https://sleepfoundation.org/ask-the-expert/sleep-hygiene
Michael Caine wades into Academy Awards controversy: Be patient – it took me years to win an Oscar
>The actor said nominations should be given based on how an actor performed - not on the colour of their skin
http://www.standard.co.uk/showbiz/celebrity-news/michael-caine-wades-into-academy-awards-controversy-be-patient-it-took-me-years-to-win-an-oscar-a3162826.html
>>53960276
good lad
>>53960278
>>53960217
yes, this
doctor gave me some zopiclone when I first started working nights and was having real trouble sleeping when I needed to
work like a charm in terms of getting you into a consistent sleeping pattern
>>53960294
How can one man be so correct about everything?
>>53960294
>that poll
>>53960294
what a bloody racist
>>53960273
read that as *bangs pilum on scrotum* ahahahaha x
>>53960278
>>53960310
thanks lads i might try that
>>53960294
Michael 'see a nigger, pull the trigger' Caine
>>53960294
He's too sensible and logical for the world we live in now.
got fired today lads
>been posting in the wrong thread
anyone want to open my case of lisickis?
http://www.standard.co.uk/showbiz/celebrity-news/clueless-actress-stacey-dash-slams-oscars-boycott-as-ludicrous-and-calls-for-scrapping-of-black-a3161596.html
>>53960294
Next year black people will win everything at the Oscars as an apology for this shitstorm.
The only question is whether best director will go to Spike Lee or Steve McQueen.
>He's too sensible and logical for the world we live in now.
>>53960405
>clueless-actress-stacey-dash
bit harsh
just picked up the new mad max from choices lads
>>53960405
Why is it always the a-list black celebrities that have benefited from the system calling for the boycott, and the less famous/successful black celebrities saying it's stupid? (The girl in the article, Aunt Viv from fresh prince)
>>53960405
are they calling her clueless or did she star in something called clueless
>>53960273
car won't start
Today's a good day
Selling my computer, and I'm gonna go watch the force awakens
>>53960294
fucking arrest him for hate speech
I am done with white people smfh
>>53960413
Hopefully Steve McQueen since he's actually a good director. Fucking love Shame and Hunger.
>>53960455
>that room
>that thumb
troll/10
>>53960443
That-Girl-from-Kayne-West-Video
>>53960473
whos that
>>53960474
han solo gets killed by his son kylo ren
hey guys, you know pasteurising and how it gets rid of germs and shit, why don’t they just do that to meat then there would be less cooking? desu i think I’ve come up with a pretty good idea
>>53960473
mate have you considered maybe that your car is a fridge or something because fucking hell mate
>>53960455
>Implying that hand is real
>>53960455
I remember this was posted on /sp/ and /tv/ months ago. Show the basement you live in. Some Chinese people's house right! And they give you their old laptops
<<<< me
>>53960471
are you doing drinking tonight
dont know whether i can be bothered, would have to go to tescos :((((
>>53960513
oh yeah you're right there mate it was a fridge haha what am i like
>Fucking love Shame and Hunger.
listneing to hospice lads
>>53960513
it's a gimmick u dip
fucking dog is whining for a walk again just shut the fuck up and let me masturbate in peace
>>53960294
What is this cracker-ass limey old-ass niggah saying?
We were, as Howard ass Carter discovered pharaohs, and shit.
>>53960587
oh fuck he heard me he's running
>>53960505
if i ever see you in real life ill cut you up.
>>53960587
Masturbation is a sin.
>>53960595
>http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3411609/High-flying-student-21-track-class-degree-dies-taking-legal-high-calm-exam-nerves.html
another drug taking degenerate removed from this earth kek
>>53960587
Take it out you lazy git
what you currently up to lads?
>>53960498
Captain America
>>53960636
"work"
>>53960531
Always have a few beers on fajita friday but the question of whether I shall have a few more beers is yet to be decided.
One shall be in the possession of such beers though should the mood arise.
>>53960636
Had a sundae
>>53960629
lol
>>53960631
but it's wet out and i have no wellies, you want me to get a pair of shoes wet you sociopath?
>>53960587
Let him lick Nutella off your willy. Keeps him entertained and gets you off.
>>53960636
"wank"
>>53960629
The '''''''''''''''''''''''''''''university'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''' of hull
Got some very good cocaine lids
Was splitting it up into 4x gram bags and rubbed the tiniest bit of spillage on my gums and they are numbed to fuck
WEW
i dont have a gf lads
>>53960671
>I have no wellies
t. manchild that's never had a proper job
>>53960669
did you remember to poo in the loo today pahjeet?
>>53960636
doing a cheeky workpost. One day you'll be able to as well.
>>53960680
Masturbation is a sin.
>>53960646
thanks
>>53960671
Yes, you wasteman
>http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3411620/The-20-postcodes-Britain-likely-burgled-London.html
s-such a g-glorious, v-vibrant m-metropolis g-guys, w-we need m-more immigrants
>>53960715
i work in B&Q lad
that's super hardcore
>22 days into 2016 and janny hasn't made himself present yet
Oh jannnnnnnnnnnnny? where art tho janny?
>>53960629
looks like the ban wasn't quick enough
poor guy, he had no idea that just because it was legal doesn't mean it's safe
we need more legislation before more people hurt themselves with things they know nothing about
Nevermind that the ACMD is actually against a blanket ban because they have more than an inch for foresight. That information doesn't help get things banned so it's no good.
>>53960629
that was 18 months ago, why are they publishing it now? Wouldn't have had anything to do with the psychoactive bill would it?
>>53960757
>literally all in paki areas
>>53960701
why are you doing that at home haha
http://www.manxnationalheritage.im/news/closure-of-the-horse-trams/
fuck's sake
>>53960786
actually he closed an early /brit/ thread on the 14th of january 21:43 GMT, and we were all thankful for our janitor to clean up messes like that. we should be less hostile towards him
>>53960658
>fajita friday
might go to tescos later on p'raps, not yet decided. bit rainy and that
>>53960629
>etziolam
how much did he fucking take lmao
also he looks like a /brit/ poster desu
>>53960757
>top comments
Good to see DM commentors are as red-pilled as BBC top commentors. Next stop to fixing our country is a successful brexit.
>>53960814
Didn't even do a line, just rubbed a tiny spec on my gums for bants and wew fucking lad
>>53960830
t. the janitor
sub reddit idea: /r/dailymailcomments
>>53960814
do you always leave your house to split drugs up? I always do it at home if I'm picking stuff up for a mate or something
>>53960870
haha lad you are absolutely
*start clenching my jaw*
MENTAL
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-35383371
>>53960900
no i just got the image that he was alone in his room doing coke but that was wrong
Might just get a gf solely for the reason that I can't be arsed wanking anymore, just gets messy and it's disgusting. Want to get some slut to take it
who else here gets goosebumps watching this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocCYI7aJ9aw
its so easy to be a bellend and say its shite but the crowd are fucking loving it
We say: a new mode of thought. Today our whole official political outlook is rooted in the view that the State must be maintained because the State in itself is the essential thing; we, on the other hand, maintain that the State in its form has a definite purpose to fulfill and the moment that it fails to fulfill its purpose the form stands condemned. Above everything stands the purpose to maintain the nation's life - that is the essential thing and one should not speak of a law for the protection of the State but for the protection of the nation.
think I've got a crush on janny desu lads
how do I tell him
I fucking knew how this story would end before I even read it.
You can probably guess what happens just from the title.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3411753/Mother-slashed-taxi-driver-s-face-wine-glass-chased-cab-tried-throw-having-no-fare.html
>>53960906
PINGAZZZZ
>>53960954
>Not cumming out of the window
700mg lyrica up the shitter
>>53960669
Your lads from Microsoft Mumbai finally quit calling my landline. Their proxy Manchester and London virus helplines too. Thank god because my aunt is 82 and in Ireland and when she was ill I was waiting for a call in case I was needed. God bless you for reminding me every day that my phone accepts international calls India.
You are beautiful compassionate people.
>>53959684
Azumi
Only gook I'd fuck
>>53961013
I live in a loft conversion with a skylight if I done that the whole street would see.
Need a girl because the feeling of someone else giving you a wank is unbeatable
>>53960832
Will coincide my mozzers trip with picking up the moggie from the vets.
Haven't driven the car in about six weeks so am quite worried about it not starting/me crashing into something.
>>53961071
disagree
cant beat ur own wank
especially if your a sad act with a toy fanny like me
>>53961071
Lie under the skylight with it open and shoot your cum out of it.
What time should I go?
just got some reebok classics lads, score
>>53960184
SCROUNGERS BTFO AGAIN
>>53961109
you'd need to edge for like 6 hours to get that sort of pressure, swear down
>>53961123
what time does your gf want to go?
p decent film
>>53960184
*slips you a crisp 5 pound note to delete this post*
parents were taking my sister to the airport, they were supposed to be back 30 minutes ago. I'm a bit worried, my mates are picking me up in half an hour but I don't really want to leave until they're home
am i being paranoid
me
>>53961123
1.45
t. goes-to-the-cinema-several-times-a-week lad
> friends who don't have iPhones so you have to use shitty fucking Whatsapp to talk to them
> started getting spam group messages from Abdul on my Whatsapp now, probably because some dickhead installed a virus on their shitty plastic android which nicked their contacts
Tarmac the fucking lot
>>53960
If proper drug education was taught in school instead of "one joint and you'll become a heroin addict" this wouldn't have happened.
>>53961099
What are toy fannys like? Can't beat a big sexy dominant slut with death grip
>>53961123
What time does your partners son want to go?
>Zomboy sampled a Capsule track
https://youtu.be/oUE2sCwZ2WI
wewzers
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykQ9rU3Dp9E
>>53961176
They're having a cheeky lunch somewhere
>>53961176
>ani-gay
didn't bother even reading your post you twat lmao
>>53961143
If you time it right, you can thrust your hips just as you cum and it will travel for miles.
>>53961193
You think that's bad? I had to install Viber to talk to a bird from uni. Fucking Viber.
>>53961194
toy fannys give you the sort of orgasm where u almost yelp because it's such an overwhelming one it makes your knob supersensitive and its almost sore
absolute toe curler
>>53961176
>planes
>on time
>any transport
>on time
Can't imagine the state I'd be in without my gf ngl you know, staying up late, not eating right and that
Some of you lot must be right trainwrecks haha
>>53961235
>that snap oversteer in a fwd shitpiece
VAUXHALL SEAL OF QUALITY
>>53961235
I don't appreciate the implication that there are muslims in Northern Ireland. We've done a good job keeping their numbers low and I'd like it if you didn't make them feel more important than they are.
>>53961176
maybe they stopped at the store on the way back
im sure they are fine anon
Really don't understand why I don't have a gf
>>53961255
Do you not feel like a grim cunt after you're done?
I'd end up posting it in some cunts letterbox for a laff
>>53961214
tune
>>53961193
>friends who can afford iphones
>friends
haha lad just drop them lol stupid cunts
>>53961307
cause you dont talk to any girls
Lena
7: pm
>>53961193
>acting superior when you have the 21st century official seal of plebbery and mindless consumption
>>53961193
>> friends who don't have iPhones so you have to use shitty fucking Whatsapp to talk to them
what? why would you "have to use" whatsapp? just text them or use facebook message
>>53961308
nah hardly use the thing though cant be arsed with the lube only for special occasions
>>53961299
aye
>>53961235
*slips you a fiver to delete this*
it's buggins turn
>>53961369
>he doesnt have a group chat
>>53961193
love the way whatsapp makes iphone wankers pay to use the service and gives it away free to android lads. literally lmaoing in your face
>>53961255
I imagine real ones are like that too
>>53961214
not terrible but somewhat irritating and i hate the retard so-called artwork
>>53961391
i have several but they're all on facebook like a normal person who isn't a terrorist
>>53961358
those hips are something else
>>53961382
>He uses toy fannies
>In Norn Iron
I bet you're that fucking scooter poof.
2022 already
>>53961405
maybe it's a uk thing
>>53961395
biological clumps of cells can't beat lab engineered perfection
>>53961408
do they lie?
are 4 letter girls names more attractive or something
>>53961395
2bh sex is overrated. After bashing your gf for so long her fanny just gets completely fucking wrecked and loses sensation.
The initial sex though is just like wanking but a really tight fleshy grip on your penis and a nice warm glow. It's like the texture of a squid wrapped round your dick.
why are there so many messaging services?
what is the point?
>>53961408
Na lad, they're still hips, I'm pretty sure.
