Essential ostrich egg edition
http://strawpoll.me/6524647/
>>53533964
Waitrose is GOAT
inb4 billionaires out
I want off this wild ride
I want to use tinder purely out of curiosity of who I'd match up with.
But I'm scared my gf might see my account and dump me.
Then again...what the fuck would SHE be doing with a tinder account
which of her tight pink holes would you fuck cara in first given free choice?
>>53533964
fuck off billionaire
really want an English Bf that i can dominate not a poof i swear
>>53534113
ear
>people are actually picking aldi
it's best supermarket not cheapest
>"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""Economic""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" migrants
>>53533964
>£2.49 for bacon
Fuck off. No bacon is that good. I'll stick to Tesco rashers
The world is divided by two factions fighting each other.
One is ruled by Idris Elba. Other is ruled by Sol Campbell.
Which one would you join?
>>53534135
angus
kpop desu lads
lads why do all willies have those white spots at the bottom
Thanks whoever gave me the idea. If she's not a Simpsons fan she can sod off anyway tbqh
>london
>>53534177
>>53534011
Hate getting halfway through films because you never know if it might improve
Never usually does
Why do old people do that lip smacking mouth noise thing?
At least no one voted Sainsburys
Absolute shithole.
mfw missed the toilet and pissed on the floor at this liquor store because m8 I know works here and now has to clean up my piss
>>53534167
'no'
>>53534177
t. Sad Lonely Cunt
>>53534039
>I have a thing where I forget to breathe when I'm in public
You have no idea how happy i am to know i am not the only one
I used to really freak out and panic but i'm better at controlling it now, no idea what the fuck is going on with that is there a name for it?
>>53534217
>missed the toilet
Because you couldn't see it, you fat fuck?
>aldi
povvo cunts
>asda
children
>coop
posh village cunts
>iceland
broken homes
>lidl
povvo cunts and immigrants
>marks
billionaire tory twats
>morrisons
radical islamists
>sainsburys
octogenarian cunts
>tesco
pakis
>waitrose
quadrillionaire royal family cunts
asked the gf to come round but she said she's with her other bf tonight
hmmm
>>53534240
i think it's called being retarded
>>53534213
WE WUZ YOUNGINZ N' SHIT *lips smack*
>>53534011
>Not being able to enjoy dubbed Jackie
I love that he did all his own dubbing instead of having a random American do his voice.
>>53534244
no, because I wanted to piss on the floor
also shagged your mom last night
>>53534213
Probably something to do with their dentures.
>>53534204
>>53534142
I literally can't explain it, I'll just be walking and then find myself completely out of breath
>>53534177
Please post Binnie or whatever her name is. I don't care if she's a meme.
>>53534197
Fucking get in lad, was really chuffed when I thought of that
>>53534247
Where do you shop?
>>53534247
>quadrillionaire royal family cunts
Povvos OUT
>>53534301
alright m8 don't break your arm jerking yourself off
>>53534158
idris every time
>>53534188
soem of the cum that gets stuck in the tube does not come out the japs eye but instead is saturated into the penal walls, after 20,000 years of filtration through the penisedentary layers it coagulates at the base of the shaft in those little spots that contain a fluid that is analogous to mineral water, if cum is the rainwater
#QED
>>53534293
I think that's just being fat lad.
>>53534287
Should have done a poo
>>>53532778
Lads
Germany have *LITERALLY* stuck the muzzie moon symbol on their flag
This is next-level cuckery
>>53534273
It is retarded, i don't remember how it started.
It's shit and i hate it
>>53534299
binnie is shit
Macaroni cheese and red sauce
Comfy tea
>>53534311
i grow my own crops and livestock like any respectable human being
>Spurs title odds 12-1
Never thought I'd see the day
>he's got the heating on
billionaires out
lend me a tenner before you go though
>>53534240
Yeah it's not a problem since I'm aware of it now, but it is rather odd
Got no idea what it is called, would feel a proper twat talking to my doctor about it
>>53534247
>implying you weren't the kid who brought his p.e. kit to school in an aldi bag
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0tlQTmEeJw6
>>53534247
>marks
>billionaire
kek mate most of the stuff in my local m&s food is 50-80% off, better deals than fucking morrisons
>>53534247
But I like Morrisons
Btw Waitrose isn't that expensive.
on my 3rd book of 2016
>>53534359
>this will be spurs beat premier league reason
>they will still finish below arsenal
>>53534339
I'm skinny but in decent athletic shape lad
>>53534352
>growing livestock
G-dless cunts OUT
>>53534376
space pencils la'
>>53534301
Wew, it worked too
>>53534244
https://clyp.it/2qebvrqo
>>53534347
All I've seen of her is one swf on /f/ that I can't find and I remember her being pretty magical.
>>53534412
>can't breathe outside
No, you're not lad.
>>53534436
Say yes, fool her into thinking you're a real casanova
>>53534436
Ask if you can steam her ham
>on my 3rd book of 2016
>>53534444
So is your last gym membership
What episode of The Office should I watch
Talking about the yank one not that shitty British remake with johnny vegas
What shoe size is everybody here haha
>>53534444
literal tyrone lol
>>53534436
Tell her about your beyblade collection and how you want to let it rip in her arsehole lad
>>53534436
Just ask her "has it worked now?"
post the waifus lads
>>53534436
>localised
wat
>>53534436
say you're hungry for steamed clams
>>53534460
I can run fine and everything, its a mental thing 100%
Yes,new pics of this cumdump. I'm jerking to this worthless,stupid toilet trash again. you fucking whore I'm gonna blow over your whoring body tart. You cockwhore,you take loads of cock at weekends you slag,here it comes bitch in your hair you slag.
>>53534528
haha lmao why is birmingham so fucking dodgy
>>53534517
Audible kek
>>53534087
bill gates please go
>>53534376
>>53534376
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0va9wGYFfws
>>53534444
DaQuorn Jamalicus?
Windy out
>>53534540
Get that checked lad.
>>53534436
Steam her clam
First events session in a few months tomorrow lads.
Going to do farmers, yoke and stones.
>>53534496
okay thas pretty good
>>53534528
>>53534500
Fuck off
>>53534574
Islam
>>53534612
No it is far too embarassing
>>53534436
Lad if this works I'll film me rattling her for you
>>53534436
>let me know if it worked on you and I'll give you an answer
tasty
>>53534508
13.
If you don't shop at waitrose then don't even bother to to talk to me fucking scum
>>53534528
>>53534528
do you like cute boys?
>>53534574
few dodgy geezas about aint there m8
watch yourself
pray i dont catch you
>>53534606
Fucking kek
>>53534653
BETABOY
I
T
C
H
B
O
Y
>>53534653
MAKE THE STEAMED CLAMS REFERENCE
Daily reminder that my waifu > your waifu
How do I get a gf like this?
>>53534444
slim jesus?
>>53534653
It'll work.
>Style: Tomorrow
>>53534574
Birmingham is great
Top 3 UK city
>>53534653
drop the fucking smileys you cunt
makes you look incredibly beta
>>53534618
What the fuck are you on about?
HELP IT'S GOING OFF THE RAILS
>>53534718
Go to Satan's Hollow in Manchester
downloaded tinder today and got my first match t.bh lads, don't really know what to say
>>53534675
stick your cock in it lad
>>53534712
>>53534645
Anxiety + not eating enough
t. went to the doctor
>>53534603
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1LZuJf2rcoa
>>53534718
get a gf with big boobs and buy her lingerie
"Top o' de marning to ya! My name is Martin O'Hare and I'm an American, but feel more Irish than American (I'm 1/2 Irish). I came by here to visit my family's roots, I don't suppose you know where the little unknown village of Dublin is, do you? Maybe you know my relatives out here! I don't think O'hare is that common out here. Pretty disappointed by the culture so far, no leprechauns to be seen! Where's your inner green?
Also I'm thirsty as hell, where's the nearest bar, because I want to try one of those Irish Car Bombs you keep talking about!"
What do?
>>53534752
S T E A M E D
C L A M S
>>53534759
'Going to the paki shop, you want anything?'
Fuck this lads, honestly, my gf's told me to watch dinner while she's in the shower and it's like baked eggs or some Nigella shit I don't fucking know what's going on
I am well out of my depth here
>>53534752
why didnt you just say you were going to steam her hams you fucking melt
>>53534744
I'm going to be doing a strongman events training session tomorrow, which I have not done for a few months.
The events I will be training include the yoke walk, farmer's walk and atlas stones
>>53534752
YA BLEW IT
YA HAD IT ALL AND YA BLEW IT
ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS SAY YOU WERE HUNGRY FOR STEAMED CLAMS
>>53534752
She's testing you, you muppet. Quick, come up with something witty
How does the matching system work on tinder? Never used it before
>>53534752
"let me finish the job in person then"
>>53534752
Wow Aurora, try not to Boremealis.
>>53534798
HAMS you fucking idiot. Steamed HAMS.
>>53534736
Nah maybe it's top 3 in terms of population but it's dodgy as fuck lmao
>>53534528
gf on the right
>>53534752
>I'm a social retard; This wasn't easy for me.
>>53534752
its fine lad, shes clearly interested. just being playful about it
just ask her to go out for a drink with you so you can win her over in time
>>53534816
Oh nice m8, are you proper hench then?
Isn't there a high risk of injuring yourself in these events?
>>53534836
you swipe right constantly and occasionally ugly girls will pop up on your screen
>>53534836
It matches a boy and a girl
>>53534802
Turn the oven up and burn it lad
Burn it all
>>53534798
>>53534823
>clams
fucking mugs
>>53534836
If you both swipe that you're interested you get to chat to them and make yourself look like a spaz
>>53534675
> HSBC
Good choice, lad
>>53534752
say something like 'fair enough, it can wait til we've had a drink/got to know each other'
got to make her feel like she isn't a slag
>>53534853
eyebrows
>>53534836
You swipe right if you like them. If they like you back they swipe right on you. Then you can talk.
>>53534884
Funny joke
liverpool is genuinely one of the best cities in the UK right now
>>53534836
You set you age range and distance range then you get girls pop up, swipe right for yes swipe left for no. If you both swipe right you get a window to chat in
OVER 30 CORK GIRLS PICTURES ON PORN SITE - Following on from our story from earlier, we have been contacted by numerous young Cork girls whose Facebook photos have been harvested and shared on a porn website. Some of the photos taken were from when the girls were under 16. This evening, up to 30 further pictures of underage Cork females were uncovered on the website. We'll speak to some of the girls and have the full story tomorrow from 9am. [email protected]
bane lads
http://vocaroo.com/i/s01MgqcEMgqm
>>53534752
Just tell her "You are a little bit won over though". Tell that bitch how she feels. And cut back on the fucking emoticons.
>>53534890
Oh, doesn't sound like my kinda thing desu
>>53534967
Here we go
>>53534967
>clams
FUCKED IT
>>53534884
>you are out of likes for today please wait 12:00:00
>>53534967
fucked it
>Halo 5s servers are down
>>53534967
mate
you've fucked it
>>53534967
you ruined it
>>53534967
>clams
YOU
FUCKING
BLEW
IT
STEAMED HAMS YOU CUNT. HAMBURGERS. STEAMED HAMS. I hope she calls out on it, you fucking faggot. That's what you get for listening to the fucking leaf.
>>53534893
They've been in there maybe 20 minutes on 180
Mate there might be sausages under them eggs honestly this is getting away from me something rapid
>>53534967
now you blew it
+1 for banter
-1 for your virignity
>>53533964
Where's Harrots?
nowt wrong with clams or hams you rubes
>>53534877
>Oh nice m8, are you proper hench then?
like 16 and a half stone at 6'3
The only bit of me I'd say looks properly big are my traps and neck
>Isn't there a high risk of injuring yourself in these events?
Stones are pretty dangerous (you have to bend your arms so there's a risk of bicep tears etc) but farmers and yoke are pretty safe because you can just drop them if you feel something go. The really dangerous events aren't done unless you're a genuinely good strongman
taking a really nice shit
>>53535039
What is Harrots?
>>53535015
Alri Dormers
>>53534910
her eyebrows are cute
>>53535015
343 killed the franchise lad, accept it.
>>53535063
the quote is steamed hams you fucking cretin, not clams
that's why he brings out burgers, not FUCKING CLAMS
igor is literally browsing this thread as we speak
>>53534967
>Actually listening to the spergs on here
Before she has chance to reply to that pure autism say something else. Ask her where she's from or something
burned my corn dog lads
>>53534772
I refuse to believe that hunger can have an effect
Anxiety probably does come into it
what is this steamed clams steamed hams shite
is this a reference or something
>>53535087
Harrots in Knightsbridge.
aware me on 'steamed clams' lads
kwak tori desu lads
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zYrjCF_wDu4
>tfw it's been 3 (three) hours and she still hasn't replied to your incredibly funny and witty tinder opening line
>>53535151
What's a corn dog?
How do you make them?
Just bought some stuff from a yank on reddit
best part is that when I get my tracking number, I'll do a paypal refund wahey
>>53534967
>>53534970
try grindr then
>>53535110
>>53535161
>>53535170
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4lnZr022M8
>>53534957
Post them
>>53535169
87-135 Brompton Rd, SW1X 7XL
>>53535141
>>53535141
imagine being such a pleb that "the football" was the main thing about your life and who you are
>>53533964
Best Supermarket is 'Booths' it's like Waitrose, but up North, better and there are less of them.
I've only been a few times, but it BTFOs everywhere else. Voted Waitrose though; best nationwide chain.
>>53535110
am I being trolled? both are said in the bit
he burns the steamed clams so has to replace them with krusty burgers
>>53534962
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1Tv3ZJ2YjkX
>>53535093
Hello friendly gay yorkshireman
>>53535101
Yeah especially with that 3 million dollar tournament coming up.
Halo 5 is killing it FaM and i'm on the best players in the UK.
>>53535156
when i have bad anxiety i have zero appetite and not eating makes me feel like complete shit anyway because I'm getting no nutrients but I just feel sick if I eat anything
>>53534039
fuck off tim
>>53535194
Hot dog in pancake batter, on a stick
Eaten with ketchup and mustard
>>53535219
Why isn't it listed on strawpoll?
HEY GUYS FINISH OF MY SENTENCE
"IF I LIKE BROWSING THE BOARD /INT/, I WOULD ALSO ENJOY THESE BOARDS:..."
>>53535161
how do you not know about steamed hams
>>53534970
there is a homo setting but I don't know how many poofters use it
I banged a bi girl off it and she said it was almost impossible to find girls on there so I'd assume it's the same
>>53535282
/sp/
how did a manlet immigrant jew like henry kissinger become so powerful
fucking hell lads, this bird is so peng
anyone know who she is?
https://youtu.be/yvHYWD29ZNY?t=277
>>53535100
Wew that was a good dinner
>boil some new potatoes
>flash fry with capers, spring onions, lemon zest and flaked smoked salmon
>top with fresh dill & 2 poached eggs
She unmatched me, the first fucking girl who I matched with in two fucking weeks...
kms. thanks a lot...
>>53535282
/pol/
>>53535270
harrods is not a supermarket
>>53535234
You should probably get off them before they suffocate :^)
>>53535316
alri
>>53535282
/sp/
they both specialise in international banter and don't have much sperging relative to the rest of 4chan
>>53535213
>posting yankshite
FOY
>>53535234
>gay
>>53535355
autism
>>53535244
they call me tim
thats not my name
>>53535238
never experienced it like that
My diets always been decent at worst, though I do eat a bit less then other people
>>53535329
What is it?
>>53535350
>>53535282
/u/
>>53535300
fetty wap
>>53535156
I started eating more and it lessened, now when i don't eat it i get fucked up
Perhaps it's just in my head but it helped
Go see a doctor and talk about anxiety, they are there to help and they really don't judge you for it
>>53535350
>don't have much sperging relative to the rest of 4chan
>what is le UTV man
>>53535350
this
only browse /int/ and /sp/
>>53535388
department store
>no reply from the tinder guy
kek
KEK
>>53535321
What did you expect when you took the advice of virgins on a Laotian crunk website to bombard her with Simpsons memes?
>>53535390
>4 seconds, 4 posts
fuck they must be short on memes
>>53535406
dont b cheeky
WHAT THE FUCK
WHERE ARE YOU
>>53535254
cornmeal batter*
How many pairs of shoes is it normal to own?
>>53535460
nice unedited picture mate
>>53535460
EPICCCCCCCCCCCC MAN XDDDDDDD
>>53535460
You could at least try to match the fonts you nonce
>>53535390
TSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
>>53535410
I've had treatment for social anxiety and I'm alri now
This however is far too retarded for me to talk about
>>53535423
an isolated incident
I just mean the general vibe is more pleasant than places like /tv/, /v/ etc
>>53535460
font is too bold Tbh
try harder
>>53535493
>>53535501
>>53535507
Fuck off I couldn't find one close enough
>>53535300
Glad you asked us pal, because we here at /brit/ are specialists with random slags in rap videos
Christ the dentist is expensive: £66 for check-up and £67 for hygienist
>>53535464
One nice pair of shoes, one pair of something comfortable and one pair for vanity
what is nip moot doing?
>>53535423
>relative to the rest of 4chan
>>53535563
shame the only random slags we're experts in are your mum and sister
>>53535423
>>53535423
unironically have skrtelpower as a friend on facebook, his names jack and i sold him weed once too
>>53535460
>not the same font
>image name style has changed
done tryin
Parents don't have house or contents insurance haha what madmen haha we live on a floodplain haha
>>53535300
Boat Girls:
Melissa Soria
Suzanne Quast
Julia Misaki
>>53535591
>going to the dentist
>>53535493
>>53535501
>>53535507
>>53535552
He wanted to get caught. It was his master plan to crash the (You) market
WITH NO SURVIVORS
>>53535517
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1fl1ozru5wq
yeah i give up
>>53535610
>F-
Fuck off yank
