alcoholism edition
hello i am humorous teller of story from estonia
*vigorous applause*
1st for /balt/
Good start, chaps.
why is Ieva such a dumb cunt
I've been coughing so hard my abs hurt.
>>53367262
late, is normal of estonia, always slow
*laugh*
classic joge nr. 1 from me
>>53367323
why do you even have abs, normie?
>>53367308
whoa
*grabs you by the throat*
back the fuck off!?!?
>>53367356
Because I'm too skinny for fat to be there instead.
>>53367368
i'm trying
>>53367206
>up next, jewish propaganda
good luck :)
>>53367470
morning, /pol/
>>53367546
it's past noon you degenerate :)
i fucking told you ieva and tommy boy had a thing going already for a long time, like months ago, but did you listen? no, no you didn't!
i also prophesized that they have a secret baby, the newborn to rule over livonia and take control over the lithuanian territory, but did you listen? no, no you didn't. (this actually has not been confirmed, but the stars tell no lies)
>>53367592
I still haven't smoked my morning cigarette so technically it's still morning :)
>>53367670
i smoked my evening pipe so technically it's already evening
>>53367670
>smoking tobacco jew
kek
>da j00s xd
>>53367258
vigorous milk balls
>>53367697
I believe you because Estonia is Uralic
>>53367713
>he doesn't pay as much taxes as possible to his motherland so it could spend 2 percent of GDP on defense
>>53367662
>and take control over the lithuanian territory
try it bitchbois, vytautas left an heir this time
Just ate 6 weetbix boys haha
>>53367771
>he doesn't assign 2% of his income tax to the army and another 1% to the conservative party
>>53367206
will /bantz/ be this year's General of the Year?
>>53367771
> >he doesn't pay as much taxes as possible to his motherland so it could spend 2 percent of GDP on refugees
yeah nah
>>53367858
livonias shadow grows from the north
polands stink spreads from the south
the time to form alliance has come
>dislike what's happening in Cologne and other places
>browse/r9k/ for 5 minutes
>mfw this is how it should be, praise fucking Allah
My body is a cage.
>>53367966
/bantz/ was last years GOTY even with the short run time.
Pavojuj motina-tėvynė;
Ateina audra iš pietų!
Tai lenkas, išgama tautų,
Mums neša pančius ir žudynę,
Dvarų ieškodams prarastų.
Dar vakar svetimoj vergijoj
Prieš caro klaupės dievukus, -
Prancūzo nūn globoj puikus
Mums švaisto gautu kalaviju
Ir mūsų degina laukus.
Gana po priedanga brolystės
Mums čiulpė syvus pasalais!
Kultūros savo skarmalais
Mums plėšė kalbą dėl lenkystės
Ir smaugė savo verpalais!
Dabar šalin numetęs kaukę,
Ginkluotus siunčia plėšikus
Ir taško mums kraujais laukus,
O po Europą visgi šaukia,
Kad tai ne jų būrys smarkus.
Gana lietuviškos kantrybės!
Ginkluota kelkis; Lietuva!
Dienelė laukia nelengva!
Bet gelbės dangiškos galybės,
Ir paskutinė bus kova!
Petys į petį už tėvynę!
Nuo Palangos lig Varėnos,
Sulaukę puotos kruvinos,
Kaip mūsų proseniai ją gynė,
Taip ginsme sūnūs šios dienos!
>>53367865
Bit late for weetbix isn't it ?
>>53367206
>tfw hangover
>>53367978
How can anyone be outraged and scream deus vult or whatever that some nightclub sluts go their std infested crotches groped by some shitskins? kek how can anyone be such kaks?
>>53368033
blasphemy! a man should exercise his freedom to weetbix as he chooses best
what's weetbix lol :3
>>53368058
same, but i am medicine man so no problem
>>53368058
just hang yourself
Mu aken on seestpoolt jääs.
Lithuanians, are you ready to join the army tomorrow and serve your president comrade Grybauskaite?
>>53368091
jep, mul ka, aknaraamide vahelt tuleb räigelt külma vittu küll xDD
>>53368082
Ah, the solution to all problems
>>53367943
>he doesn't tithe 10% of his income to the church
>>53368102
literally all my posts
pic related is also my post
>>53368178
weird font
>>53368178
>my posts
yeah but in the end you're a nobody so it doesn't really matter
>>53367206
this goldfish cracker is my new favourite youtuber
>>53368146
good idea
>>53368224
pupinia old and busted
/balt/ ??? more like the home of sexual assault
>>53368255
hi hello this is not the german thread
take care
>>53368255
do you even benis in bagina?
>>53368102
>>53368178
legitimately all me
>>53368010
/balt/ alone wasn't doing too bad either
>>53368255
/brit/ ???
more like the royal saggy tit
>>53368255
we don't have any rapeugees yet
>>53368255
/brit/ ??? more like just shit on my clit
>>53368073
Wheat biscuits, they're a breakfast food, good and filling.
>>53368255
more like /eng/
>>53368309
pls be in Valga
>>53368347
>you will never live in Valga so you could walk to a Latvian booze store
>>53368127
miks ei tihenda neid siis?
>>53368282
>>53368286
>>53368288
>>53368294
>>53368298
>>53368309
>>53368341
/balt/ ??????? more like geographical fault
>>53368402
>>53368347
you're legally allowed to live outside your respective capital cities lads, it's not just for wildlife and trees
>>53368298
>be german
>let rapeugees molest your gf
>do nothing about it
LMAO :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
>>53368338
Can be good with milk.
>>53368427
>/balt/
>fault
>I can't correctly pronounce my own language
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAH
>>53368427
you?????? more like faggot
>>53368429
but what about jowbs
>>53368427
/brit/ ??? more like shitskin starter kit
>>53368443
>t*rks will never know the taste of pig's milk
lmaoing
>>53368443
Yeah only fucking nutcases eat them without milk.
>>53368427
Sir I wish you a good Sunday but don't bully my friends or I will get angry.
>>53368496
i took one look at them and decided they are probably better without milk :S
>>53368462
idiot
I don't know how you muppets pronounce English but that is an exact rhyme
>>53368522
hello mehmet
groped any white woman today??
>>53368627
rude
>tfw autistposting so much for fun
>tfw today i will spend my evening with at least 4 girls whose 2 are interested in me
>tfw not talking about ones on reserve
>>53368624
>implying the u is silent
AHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
>>53368624
/brit/? more like "uh-oh, will this turban ever fit"
>>53368592
Say that after you're halfway through one and dying of thirst.
>>53368643
merely a joke
>>53367206
Is she the first queen of the /balt+/ausnz?
>>53368658
http://dictionary.cambridge.org/pronunciation/english/fault
>>53368659
>he thinks muslims wear turbans
sikhs are bro tier
>>53367258
Bring the memes
>>53368627
Why should I need it while I'm desired.
>>53368716
mashiro or the 3dpd cunt?
>>53368592
Too dry m8, but if you find some I challenge you to eat a few without milk.
>>53368752
accepted
My fuckin ankle hurts FUCK
>>53368751
that autistic girl
>>53368725
Is there a Latvian version of this?
>>53368722
a towelhead's a towelhead
>Estonians
>>53368786
Isn't that what Liberty City is?
main char was Lithuanian
What do you ladies think of our new VIRAL lamb ad?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7i15OPuFvmA
>>53368649
is this chap the 190cm master race of /balt/?
>>53368786
latvian try of creatings latvia version
no work, also cold
only potato want put, but premise absurd, no potato
*laugh track*
>>53368819
EOG is aesthetic as fuck
>>53368819
>>53368864
>estonian '''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''military'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
>>53368729
In my last job doing house removals we moved some middle aged woman who left her husband to have an affair with a Turk. Moved her to the Turk's house (above a kebab shop). Two weeks later we had to move her out because he was such a cunt to her.
Don't know what white women see in those greasy fucks desu
>>53368891
>tfw you will never have an qt EDL gf
>>53368891
>'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
>'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''
unequal amount of apostrophes
0/10 would not kek
>>53368894
>Two weeks later we had to move her out because he was such a cunt to her.
Genetics. Centuries of not giving a shit about girls because Balkans gifted them to us made us anti-social towards girl. Turkish literature has a lot of poems and best ones are always about non-woman related topics like war, politics, people.
>Don't know what white women see in those greasy fucks desu
I know foreigner girls and they all complaing white men are too kind and intellectual. They want hard men.
>>53368984
>tfw no turkish gf
why even live
>>53368716
Yes
>>53368729
Bear in mind that anyone who finds T*rks sexy probably imagines a typical Spaniard and have most likely never been to T*rkey.
>>53369066
I sense the feeling Estonians are the ones who love me most here. My presence is like a habit to them. Amirite?
>>53369123
We have good looking men.
Daily reminder that T*rkey is indeed a white mans best allie
>>53369066
She a cute desu
>>53369186
>tfw no qt turkish bf to hug
WHY EVEN LIVE
>>53369202
BASED
A
S
E
D
>>53369202
holy shit, best ally :DD
gonna go invest in turkish delight a.s.a.p
>>53369202
Always showing the rapeugees as little grills
>>53369202
Hahaha you cheeky cunts.
>>53369235
>Kurdo
>top left is a famous Armenian meme
>>53369255
shed a tear for muh wumyn and chidlren anon
get very emotional anon
love them anon
t. absolutely unbiased reporter
>>53369388
exactly!
Turkish men are the best
If this general is a cuisine made of different flavours, what would I taste brothers ?
>>53369388
It's the ugly landwhales and the insane.
>>53369507
Stick a finger in ur ass and lick it
>and on the last day of creation
>when our god, the maker, had already ran out of quality material to build men
>he created mehmet
>my son, not much have i to make you
>so, many legs you shall have in compensation of you lack of brain and physical beauty
>and six, six legs were given to mehmet
>mehmet! legs i have given you, yes
>but eyebrows i have not enough to give
>one, one eyebrow you shall have
>and god looked upon on what he had created
>and loled
>>53369632
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
>>53369632
>>53369632
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
>>53369632
Idk what game this is. Idk if it's for Steam or Origin or whatever.
CX9H-LSQZ-NY6F-PFVT-UBKH
Just have it, if you get it tell me what it was.
Have a good year, lads.
dubs :DD
>>53370384
not valid
fuck you
>>53370409
Rude
Sorry, m8
>>53370384
>non-free software
>>53370422
nice
sorry too m8
>>53370448
I'm sorry but we Balts value freedom above all
>>53370560
>bleeding edge
>pacman broke everything again
>>53370618
Works on my machine :^)
I smiled at a gorgeous asian girl on the train today
She giggled and blushed
I do not have anywhere near the confidence to actually say anything though
I spent the rest of the night fantasizing about railing her
>>53370560
fucking arch fag. You are the reason why /g/ is mehh
Guys, I'm hungry
>>53370720
here take this fat cock
>>53370745
Photo?
>>53370720
I have something for you :^)
*unzips pants*
>>53370778
>off by one
imagination
Any anon from Tallinn can answer this; Why are some of the bus lines gone? Almost got lost there.
>>53370618
but anon, my arch server seems to work quite well...
>>53370842
some of the lines are gone, some are replaced by other numbers, some are new lines with new numbers... things just evolve
>>53371057
Trolleys are gone and replaced with 43 or something.
Real talk: If I went to Europe, would I enjoy Baltic states? Are they honestly worth visiting?
>>53371195
24, 24A, 43 and something else which i don't remember
>>53371213
everyone who has been here has liked it
>>53371213
Most likely.
http://www.latvia.travel/en
>>53371213
Not gonna hype, but you most definitely plan your trip. Have a local show around, get drunk and visit the country side and take a sauna. That's like tourism 101, if you're not into some weird train watching fetish.
>>53371213
hello my friends how are you? i dont feel well.
>>53371909
ui ui ui ui vitttuuuu kui ilus see eestimaa on xDDD
/bantz/ ?? more like pants
>>53371998
getting better by the minute. what's wrong? too much dry weetbix?
>>53372050
nigel, you've outdone yourself with that one xDD
>>53372024
mul selliseid 9gag tier pilte sitaauguni :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD see hea propaganda välismaalastele, toovad €€€€€€ eestisse XDXDXD
>>53372050
/brit/ ?? more like reddit tier /lit/
haha rekt lmao
>>53372201
LMAO
>>53372077
what was wrong? a cold?
>>53372113
>Kazaa
>Skype
>Estonian
Ohooohho
>tfw you see your crushes pic in the newspaper after all the years
>tfw she has gotten a bit more chubby so i like her even more than the skelly version
fuck this cruel earth, fuck it all, lithuania here i come
>>53372332
nah mate, just a regular hang over, was a "getting smashed with the boys" kind of night yesterday xDD
>>53369388
>>53372117
>>53372360
mida sa ajad retard? mõlemad on eestlaste poolt developed
>>53372369
kes nendest seal su crush on? xd
see tumedate juustega?
>>53372448
See tumedatega on ideaalne Tbh
>>53372401
and now we wait for the sterotypical dane/swede meatball inventor to barge in
>akshualli, shkype and kazhaa are our inventshons
>>53372448
vasempoolseim
>>53372393
i'm actually 2/3 lithuanian :DDDD
>>53372369
vodka i assume?
>>53372401
Still kazaa is nothing to be proud of. Maybe at first, good times.
>>53371213
People seem to like it here. It's comfy.
If you do some planning ahead of time, you'll probably like it here.
https://www.youtube.com/user/onLithuania/videos
This channel has nice videos.
>>53372485
minu arust on see vasakult teine perf
>>53372486
pildi peal ei tundu väga chubby
>>53372507
Once you leave Lithuania you are no longer a Lithuanian..
>>53372571
>No sunscreen
Like melanoma is a damn joke to you?
>>53372578
and? you are acting like i fucking created the picture XD
fucking autist arguing over a meme picture!
ps. eesti keelt ei oska v et mulle inglise keeles vastad? xd
>>53372571
beer and whiskey, i can't stand the taste of vodka
>>53372602
võrreldes sellega, miline ta kunagi oli...
>>53372606
>Once you leave Lithuania you are no longer a Lithuanian..
Yes, you are stealing cars in Germany and become a Turk
>>53372606
my heart still belongs to Lithuania
>>53372696
i call bullshit on you being 2/3 lithuanian xd
QUESTION FOR ESTONIANS
I'm thinking of moving to Estonia, because Lithuania is shit. What's the tax rate for self-employed people? I can only find conflicting information.
>>53371213
>>53372735
xd lmao just banter haha
>>53372658
Vb peaks internetti kõnetooni märgid panema, ma ei vaidle, ausalt öeldes mul suht savi ja mingit autismi pole meie vahelises kõnes.
Ja alles nüüd, kui ma vastan muutub see autismiks.
>>53372736
why do you want to move to Estonia?
>>53372736
UMARU STAY OUT
OUT OUT OUT
>>>/out/
>>53372800
>käib 4channis
>väidab et ta pole autist
>>53372736
self-employed? 0 (zero). you create a firm, become the sole share owner and only investor. then you do contracts. "re-invest" the profits. write the required amount of capital out as dividends. and voila!
estonian economic liberalism 101
>>53372806
Lithuania is shit, that's why. Big Taxes, dumb politics, tax inspection contacts me ~10 times/year, because they think I hide taxes etc.
>>53372913
Thanks m8. You just convinced me to move.
>>53372894
Fucking bait, iga cunt, kes käib foortsännis on autist. Meie vestluses polnud enne autismi.
>>53372894
tead anon, mul on sinust ja su pasast kõrini! xDD
>>53372956
np, what do you do anyway?
>>53372736
they tax 20% of your profit if you are self employed here and only retards do that it's easier to make your own firm and keep the money rotating so they can't tax you.
>>53373013
ära ole nii kuri pls :(((((((((((((((
>>53373080
post moar
is the lithuanian language anything like the latvian language?
>>53373080
kasi minema oma 3DPD pasaga
>>53372736
>>53372956
ONE MORE QUESTION
How much do apartments cost? I have 80k euros in the bank is that enough for a decent 2 room apartment with a private parking spot? Or is it better to just rent?
>>53373013
Programmer
>>53373040
thanks m8
>>53373040
in order to be self employed you have to be an employer to begin with
what you meant probably is the FIE form of business (which admittedly is fucking retarded)
>>53373080
fucking hot :DD in a very kinky and weird way kek
who she?
>>53373107
eile öösel mingi 2-3 paiku postitasin päris palju pilte temast xd
>>53373080
Post the one with a UNIX book :DDD
>>53373129
to what city you want to move to?
>>53373175
:DDD
>>53373129
you can get a brand new apartment for that money close to the city center.
They go from 50k-100k
>>53373129
80k will set you up quite nicely in the center or very near for a singleton (see: i also, am a programmer :DD) apartment, though i suggest taking a loan with base finance because money is cheap atm with the euribor being record low and all that jazz ;))
>>53373129
>I have 80k euros in the bank
fuck you
how???
how much does a starting programmer job pay in tallinn?
>>53373202
>UNIX network porogramming
>neuroscience handbook on the table
my dick is about to explode with fire and lava
>>53373273
idk about the starting pay but the average salary if you work at skype is like 3,5k €
>>53373273
They start from 2k and sky is the limit
>>53373202
>to what city you want to move to?
I thought Tallinn was the only city in Estonia?
>>53373216
Thanks m8
>>53373228
Thanks. I don't like taking loans. I still have a bunch of shares in case I need more money.
>>53373243
I saved it
>>53373313
Starting is 2k? Really?
I know a guy who programs Java and Scala shit for like 900 neto
>>53373273
can go from anywhere around 1k to 2k depending on what kind of programming you do... what your exp lvl is etc. (how well you bargain is a big part here)
>>53373317
Do you have the "real depression hours" one?
>>53373347
well he is then under paid or is shit or is jewed
2D >>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 3D
>>53373152
Leidsin arhiivist, danke.
>>53373341
Tallinn, Tartu, Pärnu and Kuresaare are the only ones worth living in.
tbhqhwyfam i would scratch Tallinn from that list because its full of bydlos
>>53373341
i'm seriously considering moving to Tartu from Tallinn because the city is nicer, there's work for programmers and it's cheaper there... could live like a boss in the old town pulling the young student meat into your warm lair and show them all the shell tricks and your c flags xDDDD
>>53373348
>>53373347
lol even in BRhueland you can make more money as a programmer
of course, bad side of it is living in this shithole
Eating salt and vinegar potato chips lads.
Living the dream tb h.
>>53373347
>Java and Scala
>900
Is that how much your government pays to the mentally retarded?
>>53373422
>>53373438
So what's the nicest city in Estonia then? Anything decent by the coast perhaps?
>>53373447
I was in brazil m8 it was pretty comfy 2bh
>>53373447
well im guessing finding a monkey that can code is harder
>>53373416
mdea mul veits on pilte temast
>>53373447
>you can make more money as a programmer
you can make a solid 4k plus if you're set up in a good company and know your shit, but starting jobs pay around that margin which isn't all that bad for a young person
>>53373489
>decent by the coast perhaps?
Haapsalu? Pärnu? but i don't know how the job market is there
>>53373523
you'd be surprised, but Brazil actually has decent programmers.
>>53373500
if you are only visiting, short stay and in a nice place, sure.
Try living here though.
>>53373523
>>53373527
post butt
>>53373523
kek good bantz
>>53373489
>by the coast
that would be Pärnu then, Pärnu is the estonian summer town because it has an really beautiful beach, Tartu is an university town, its full of young people, Kuresaare is on estonias biggest island and is overall very nice city.
Tallinn is an shithole and i will definetly move away from here when ill finish my studies
>>53373530
>Haapsalu? Pärnu? but i don't know how the job market is there
I'm a freelance programmer, I really couldn't care less about the local job market.
>>53373527
>stk kõik need pildid on kellegi poolt tehtud
>stk see ei ole sina
>>53373523
>not knowing the expression code monkey
>>53373530
Pärnu and Haapsalu are both dead
>>53373579
>that would be Pärnu then, Pärnu is the estonian summer town because it has an really beautiful beach
Thanks m8. Gonna find an apartment in Pärnu then and hopefully move there before summer ends.
>>53372666
nice trips. how much does a bottle of whiskey cost over there?
>>53373615
No they are not xd
tons of young people live in Pärnu, Haapaslu is quite dead tho, only grannies live there
>>53373583
>a freelance programmer
so just a HTML/CSS/JS faggot then?
>>53373579
do you like Tallinn's old town at least?
>>53373654
the poor rat tier whiskey is something like 7EUR and the sky is the limit
i usually end up paying ~15-20EUR for a bottle
>>53373650
only do that if you can work from home, it's a dead city(only comes alive in summer when druggies and old ppl go to relax and party there).
>>53373527
Internet kõik võimas, säästan sind postitamas, sest leidsin linki
>>53373690
>HTML/CSS/JS
>programming
>>53373690
>so just a HTML/CSS/JS faggot then?
C/C++/C#/ASP.NET//Java(for android apps)/Objective-C(for ios apps)/COBOL
I can do HTML/PHP/CSS/JS, but it's not really fun so I try to stay away from those job offers unless I can't find anything else.
>>53373729
Yup I work from home.
>>53373768
https://imgur.com/a/iCTsE
>>53373671
And what are the job's there for those young ppl?
you are lucky if you get 800e a month there.
More and more ppl are leaving each year from there
>>53373729
and some firms set up summer offices there for their workers...
>>53373718
ofc, i also like Nõmme, Kadriorg, Tiskre, Kakumäe, Pirita etc
there are tons of positive things about Tallinn
But the fact that soviet union ruined Tallinn by building city parts like Lasnamäe, Õismäe and Mustamäe and the fact that 35% of the population living in Tallinn are russians completly ruins the city for me
>>53367206
>I'll get a gf if I'll give a woman chocolate every day
thanks femanon
>>53373841
Why do you listen beta women, you're only getting crapped on in the long run m8
>>53373810
>COBOL
grandpa please
>>53373818
>https://imgur.com/a/iCTsE
jep see õige link
>>53373818
tõsi, aga seal eladas polegi 1000 eurost palka vaja kuna seal nii odav elada
>>53373817
noice :DD
>>53373836
b-b-but my city center is also very cute and sex :3
>>53373873
cobol maester raic
>>53373867
why would the queen of /balt + /ausnz lie to us!!!???
>>53373817
good lord... the things i'd do to her
