Rekt
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You are currently reading a thread in /ck/ - Food & Cooking
You are currently reading a thread in /ck/ - Food & Cooking
Let's have your worst
haha i've never seen this before
one more
>>7768069
FOOD REKT !!!!
>>7768069
fuck, I thought she was going to make a bloomin onion.
How the blade came close to her thumb the first time.
>>7768096
>came close
She actually cut herself if you watch. Then carried on without washing her hands
>>7768069
Is she cutting that with a butter knife?
Also that fucking camera work. Jesus christ.
>>7768069
You idiots trash Marie but do you even realize how intricate and difficult it is to pull off a star cut on an onion like that? She's clearly been to some form of culinary school unlike the VAST majority of the mouthbreathers on here.
>>7768247
>some form of culinary
one that teaches fucking shocking grip
>>7768069
>>7768272
hmmmm american cuisine, shit as always
>>7768069
>>7768069
>>7768069
Did she suffer a stroke or nervous breakdown maybe? I swear, can see chunks of skin missing from her fingers.
>>7768284
I wouldn't call opening up cans and using prepackaged garbage and forming a pig slop American cuisine. This is more like a fat fuck needing to meet his 6,000calorie a day diet, so of course a fat lazy fuck is just going to open cans and other processed crap together and load it with fat from mayo, cheese and whatever else that's cheap and eat the pig slop.
>>7768272
Jack really is a piece of shit
>>7768297
can he do anything right
>>7768272
I've sadly waited for this opportunity to ask for a "best of" jack post. Just requesting YouTube links to some of his worst abominations. Anything on par with aunt merna's party salad.
>>7768272
>>7768069
well there go my fingers
>>7768297
That's not how you make jenkem.
>>7768069
Mods please move this thread to /wsg/ in accordance with the rules.
Additionally OP, requests for media should be posted in /wsr/.
Thanks.
>>7768069
EZ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INZ_hG1lyYU
HARDMODE
>>7770652
HOLY FUCK
>>7770652
What the fuck, sauce!
>>7770717
a really long time actually
never bothered to comment tho
>>7770652
that's not real
>>7770635
>>7770652
youtube link by chance?
>>7770652
more horrifying to me was when they had no idea how to open a can
>>7771916
You mean like this?
>>7768994
/v/ here, we had E3 snack thread that turned into a BBQ thread that turned into a Jack thread
I came here for more Jack
>>7771931
What a stupid concept for a show
>>7770652
I was pretty sure a fingertip was coming off at :25
>>7771952
link to the /v/ jack thread? I want to see how they react to his buffoonery and the fact that he is a gaymer
>>7771928
were those women epic trolls? i can't believe anyone is that stupid and still possesses all their fingers.
>>7768297
That's one of those shitty sugar jars from target. They dont seal for shit. (obviously)
>>7771977
Television is shit
>>7772082
Forget the fucking hair, that bitch is lucky she didn't lose any teeth.
>>7772082
s-sauce?
>>7772082
o fuk
surprised there was no blood
>>7771928
Nobody that stupid deserves to use a Wursthoff.
>>7772082
that looks like it came off way too clean. it looks perfectly shaved off.
fake/staged?
>>7772082
fake or not this is great
>>7770593
thumbs down
>>7773462
Knowing how much Chinese girls care about their hair, it's highly unlikely.
Long, black, silky hair is one of the most important criteria for beauty.
>>7772019
I'm pretty sure they haven't cooked anything in their lives, anon.
>>7772013
Ja/ck/ threads are banned here now because mods detest anything remotely fun, and only approve of fast food threads.
>>7773629
It's almost like you're supposed to lay the meat down AWAY from you for a reason or something.
>>7773462
It's part of some forced attempt at a viral video, there's a jump cut, the moment her hair gets caught, if you watch it frame by frame in the 4th second you'll see her hair move back, off of the drill, before moving forward to get yanked off. Also the hair clump that's yanked out is fucking brown.
I'm sure that's happened to some stupid fucker who tried to do it in real life though.
Can't find the video on youtube but it was just someone trying to get some ad money.
Not exactly rekt, but this pig fucking destroys that cookie.
>>7773633
Why is this pig in a bed?
>>7773867
Because it's comfortable....
>>7773867
Why aren't you?
>>7773629
surely you can get tongs from a dollar store or something
>>7773627
Same here.
>>7770578
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P02xDmlgESY
>>7773640
Ah, the 60s...
>>7768272
> vinegar out of no where
>>7773629
oil isnt hot enough to burn heh
>>7768272
why does he flick the fat chunk away?
It makes me happy when my Ja/ck/ webms get reposted by other people.
Also, reddit upvoted this monstrosity.
>>7774190
I've got nothing to do for like 4 hours, so I'll take any /ck/ webm requests until E3 starts and I can find out what games I'm going to be lied to about this year.
>>7774185
Every fucking time.
A normal person can see this is nowhere near cooked, that normal person would have put it back, waited for it to be cooked while deleting the first footage instead of... carrying on like this is normal and uploading it...
A normal person would have done that. Let that sink in for a minute.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXVvfU0N8xM
>>7774185
>so moist!
this man is so fucking digusting
>>7774047
Full English is shit-tier without decent sausages and bacon, and they look like utter garbage
>>7774316
What about the time he made a cake with mayonnaise
>>7774327
Bonus failure
who is Jack
>>7774341
some weird show. they throw a mongoloid into a kitchen and film how he plays with raw meat.
>>7774341
He is a man who thinks he can cook.
But he cannot.
>>7774352
but...but that's DANGEROUSLY undercooked, like the pork...is it a joke channel?
>>7774331
Good lord, it looks like shit. Like literal human feces.
Does /ck/ like Simply Sara?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GqHESR3tcU
>>7774357
you don't like juicy meat?
>>7774357
No, he's just convinced that he's some down to earth everyman cutting through the pretentious liberal hipster recipes that use things like fresh ingredients and herbs.
>>7774370
It would take effort to cook something that shittily, he would've had to cook it for like a minute each side or something
thanks /ck/ i feel better about my cooking
>>7774190
Can anyone confirm that its a bad idea to cutthe meat before cooking it? It seems like you would loose a lot of moisture.
>>7774352
MMMMMMM, I just love it when my chicken is severely under cooked.
>>7774395
Yeah, that's a no no. It isn't as bad as cutting it WHILE it's cooking but it should be avoided
>>7773629
the oil is clearly quite cold
>>7774104
>lemon curd chicken
what the actual fuck
how fucking sweet must that shit be
>>7774185
thiss makes me so mad.
>>7774395
more surface area = more moisture loss but at the end of the day it's more about the temperature you take it to than anything like that. i mean everyone likes ground beef right
>>7774363
no it doesn't
why does /ck/ have such a crappy imagination that every time they want to criticise someone they find something brown and say it looks like poo
>>7774331
hahahahahahahahahahaha
>>7774185
>meat should be falling apart practically by itself
Yeah, no.
>>7774190
>cuts it
>ultra well done
>>7774197
Can you do some Bruno Albouze? He can actually cook.
https://www.youtube.com/user/BrunoAlbouze
>>7774446
Sure, if you give me a specific thing from a video you want.
link to that filipino girl making carbonara?
>>7774190
those fucking tasty videos are terrible
there's one where they cut chicken for a salad and it's LITERALLY raw on the inside and they still plate it
>>7773640
Looks like your average pate.
>>7774190
Expecting else anything from lowest common denominator: the website
>>7774461
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-PKO2FrdPY
:(
>>7774466
Nice tripdoubledubs.
They really are fucking awful. If it's a savoury recipe it's just excessive cheese and bacon to cater to the reddit meme crowd, and if it's a dessert then it's nothing but sweet stacked on sweet stacked on sweet. With bacon too, probably.
>>7774466
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0OY-Exwia4
this one? it looks completely safe
>>7774430
"Sweet as candy", like he said.
>>7774487
yes thats it
Im glad you knew which one it was
>>7774500
You might just be used to overcooked chicken
>>7774523
You can tell that the core is undercooked and that the chicken didn't firm up in the slightest bit between flipping and taking it out. I could tell before he even started cutting it.
>>7773640
That's fucking weird but not...
>the shrimp
Oh my fucking god....
>>7773633
sleep tight porker
>>7774523
>If it's not pink and translucent in the middle then it's overcooked
I also remember seeing some comment on the video saying the chicken keeps cooking when u take it off the heat, slice and put into the salad. Fucking mental.
>>7774540
So pretty much one day you undercooked a chicken and didn't die from eating it.
>>7774540
I wouldn't say "perfectly safe". You don't want to kill just 90% of the bacteria and call it a day. Or maybe call it a day, but don't call it safe.
>>7770652
the tool-making animal, they said
>>7774559
Clearly referring to the only gender that matters.
>>7774545
>So pretty much one day you undercooked a chicken and didn't die from eating it.
no, this isn't anecdotal, this is based on knowing how meat contamination and pasteurisation works.
>>7774547
you're killing much more than 90% of the bacteria if you sear the outside hard. pan frying is one of the safest ways of cooking meat. there is more danger in mixing it with the vegetables in the pan than there is in leaving the centre translucent.
>>7774517
Fat fuck detection, that looks good.
>>7774185
Doesn't he then proceed to say the claws are a bad product that doesn't work? I have some and they're great, assuming you are shredding fully cooked meat.
>>7774481
I almost puked what the fuck
>>7774481
look at how fucking dirty and disgusting that fucking stove top is jfc, only some fucking flip monkey would fucking think of this fucking abomination
>hotdogs
>kraft fucking cheese
someone please fucking put me out of my misery
>>7774517
The chicken looks just fine.
>>7770718
Please go back to /b with that newfag shit. No one gives a shit how long you've been here.
>>7774472
>art
>>7774395
It's as bad as those retards who use a fork to turn a steak.
>>7774481
Jesus Christ
>mfw seeing the husbands grimace and knowing I'll never have to eat that trash
>>7775101
It's like he's being held at gunpoint
>>7774517
But that chicken looks just fine.
>>7774331
>That hand gesture at the end.
"Wala!"
here for the american insults am I late or no?
>>7775573
I'm still here if you wanna take a jab
>>7774517
>
the chicken's fine
the guy who makes those has awful, awful technique, but the chicken is fine
>>7770593
omfg people are breaking the roles on a website that in no way affect anyone. this shit can't be going down, not on my watch!
>>7775101
I want to laugh but he has a wife who cares about him and I haven't touched a girl in years.
>>7774357
to be fair, in the video he does realise its undercooked.
he recommends blasting it in the microwave to solve that problem.
>>7770652
Oh my sweetlord, I think they're retarded
>>7774373
HE DOESNT FUCKING BLINK
CRAZY EYES
>>7770652
where can I watch this online
>>7775633
Sensual eyes...
>>7775647
i remember watching it online
>>7775614
What is 're-recordong the video' instead of looking like an idiot on youtube
Oh wait this guy uses 2 liters of mayonaise for 'salads' nevermind.
>>7775664
fucking christ thats terrifying
>>7774580
Hijras?
>>7772019
>>7775664
Can you make Henry Phillips from Henrys Kitchen webms?
>>7773867
ur mum sleeps too m8
>>7774331
Jesus fucking christ.
I don't think of myself as a very prolific or great cooker but even I know that's a bad idea.
What in the fuck is wrong with this guy. shit
>>7774481
She lives in Oman.
I have to thank whoever was posting the Jack videos. I went from being very hungry to no appetite, which is good since I ate enough today. Thank you.
>>7774425
>why would anyone make a bison burger
Bison's good, mang.
>>7774470
It's aspic, you aspie.
>>7770635
Steps:
1. Don't remove root. (Correct)
2. Remove paper. (Correct)
3. Set onion on wobbling root and proceed to make overly difficult cuts. Bonus points for holding your thumb and forefinger in the cutting range.
4. Sharp knives don't cause cellular damage! We're literally cutting it with Japanese magic right now.
5. Proceed to barely push your knife into the onion in the other direction 4 times (but only actually cut it three times).
6. Instead of just cutting the onion in half before beginning so you have a flat surface, stab a fork into the root and 'dice' your onion by hacking off large, uneven slices caused by your wobbly, uneven onion.
7. Leave a large hunk of uncut onion on the end of your folk.
Wa la!
>>7774104
>make cooking show
>not enough time to buy fresh herbs due to cooking show
>>7774104
He didn't... Take his rings off. That is absolutely disgusting.
This man shouldn't be allowed within five miles of a motherfucking chicken.
>>7770652
I don't know what I'd do if I only had those utensils, either. I take them outside and whack them with a hammer.
>>7774365
I like her. Her videos have a nice vibe to it and her voice itself is an attraction.
>you will never worship sara from her toes to her blubbery tits
>>7774425
I had a buffalo burger when I was a teenager, and it was delicious, but that idiot deserves a serious case of brucellosis for eating it like that.
>>7774197
'Til the very next day
>>7774365
She began as the first of the shitty youtube cooks.
But, she seems like such a sweet and kind person that /ck/ fell in love with her. Pretty sure a large majority of us eat this shit up.
>>7774523
The top two pieces of chicken after being added to the salad are definitely undercooked
>>7774425
>why would anyone make a bison burger
because it's good meat
>>7776122
>because it's good meat
So... you use a good piece of meat to make a burger? thats the best idea that you can have?
>>7774327
That's a real thing mang, Portillo's restaurant makes their chocolate cake with mayo.
>>7774104
Holy shit he actually cooked it properly.
>>7776186
yeah, it sounds gross, but really its not that bad, depending on what mayo you buy/make. Mayo really is just eggs oil salt and a touch of acid.
>>7776140
bison tastes good, therefore you make food out of it
thats the basis of most culinary inventions
>>7776255
yes, but if you can get a piece of meat like that you could think a better way to cook it than a fucking burger man...
>>7774878
>/b
>No one gives a shit how long you've been here.
Newfag leave.
>>7774185
Anybody got the link for this video?
>>7776140
m8, bison isn't a domesticated animal. Virtually every single cut of meat is much more tough than its equivalent on a cow plus it's very lean so there's little fat to render - you pretty much have to either cook it low and slow or tenderize the hell out of it one way or another to get a texture comparable to lean beef. As there really isn't a market for expensive cuts of red meat that have to be slow-cooked for pretty much an entire day, most of the meat is ground into hamburger and you get the excellent flavor without its unfortunate durability plus the versatility of ground meat on top of that.
Honestly, bison is only about a dollar more per pound than 93/7 at this point. If I ever need ground lean red meat then I just go for that instead or elk if I'm feel like splurging. Elk's my favorite but it's $8/lb.
>>7773640
This actually is god damn good!
>>7771928
To be fair when I was out in a place where I had nothing but a shitty knife and a spoon, that was about the same way I opened my can of meat pate.
>>7773867
Better in a bed than in a blanket.
>>7774327
>the entire point of mayonnaise, despite how gross the idea is, is to replace eggs and oil
>still adds eggs
>>7770593
>Mods please move this thread to /wsg/ in accordance with the rules.Additionally OP, requests for media should be posted in /wsr/.
3rd post says food rekt
>>7776407
https://youtu.be/ItcgIIGeFnc?t=458
>>7776702
I will watch this man's videos until he dies. They're the most fascinating things on youtube. To think that someone that fucking retarded actually exists is phenomenally compelling.
>>7774487
The three topmost pieces (the thickest part of the breast) are pink in the middle. Seriously undercooked though probably safe if fresh and handled properly.
>>7775590
>cares about him
nope
>>7773633
Man, even a pig eats in a less disgusting way than Jack.
>>7775767
FIRMLY GRASP IT
>>7775664
u gon get raepd
>>7775590
If she cared, she'd have the fucking decency to learn how to cook
>>7775555
its ''voila''
>>7776835
it's voilà , actually
>>7776609
Sure, if you're out in the middle of nowhere it's acceptable to bash the tin with a rock if that's what you've got to do.
Those two are in a fully equipped professional development kitchen, though. There are tin openers.
>>7776835
wew lad
>>7776882
>Stop liking what I don't like!
>You should only do things I like in a sophisticated manner, like a sophistic person like myself would do, in a sophisticated way. Because I'm so sophisticated.
Okay.
>>7776892
i bet you fart at the table
>>7776837
faggot here in the USA it's wala. Not that faggy french shit.
>>7776918
kill yourself
>>7776918
No, that's just you silly fags who decide to follow the 4chan meme like so many autistic sheep.
>>7776982
>autistic sheep
What's the point of shitposting if you aren't going to meme? Take the stick out of your ass.
>>7777006
Because I'm stating an honest opinion rather than shitposting.
Meming is silly, thus I refuse to do it.
Is that so hard to understand?
>>7774365
just a fruit salad, not bad... Now the macaroni salad however
>>7777010
>rather than shitposting.
We're all here to shitpost, including you.
>>7774190
>Garlic
>Shallots
>Mushrooms
Looking good
>Cream cheese
>Egg
>Chives
Oh shit what are you doing
>>7774481
Guys I'm shit at cooking and a newfag. What exactly was so bad about this?
>>7774481
>>7777053
Buy a cookbook or google recipes. Follow directions.
>>7777068
So that's it? The fact that it wasn't actual carbonara? That's not so bad.
>>7774481
>rinsing pasta
triggered
>using metal utensils in nonstick pot
TRIGGERED
>melting american cheese slices into cream of chicken soup with hotdogs to make carbonara
T R I G G E R E D
>>7768069
The tilted camera angle and set layout definitely adds a feeling of anxiety and ill ease to this video, maybe the person filming actually knows what he's doing
>>7777134
The whole video is so full of mistakes and wrongness some think it's a cooking lesson, in a "list all the problems in this video"
I don't think so, why would there be cooking and camera problems, what kind of school cover both subjects?
>>7777053
If you don't understand why it's a foul mess then you must be either retarded or so sheltered and poverty-stricken that I'm surprised you're using a computer
>>7773656
He voted for Cruz.
>>7777169
The Restaurant UK
Dunno which series this is from though, there's been 2
>>7774352
WHY IS EVERYTHING THIS MAN MAKES UNDERCOOKED
WHY
>>7777541
His son said he only cooks for YouTube videos, other than that they go out for food.
He just tries to get everything done as quickly as possible it seems.
>>7774370
The type of knife, cutting surface, and amount of force used makes me extremely uncomfortable with this webm.
>>7774169
He doesnt; he was flicking it into the waiting mouth of his wife. It's this weird fucked up thing they do with all canned foods.
>>7770635
>maximum cuts out of your onion
>>7777595
i like your filename bro
>>7777652
Where do you see her bleeding?
>>7777700
its not in that webm.. its on the full videos other places on the net.
>>7774373
>that use things like fresh ingredients and herbs.
and replaces them all with mayonnaise
>>7775101
>that grimace and sets the bowl down while constantly stirring it and pretending it was good...
>>7777156
Ok.
Sorry guy.
>>7774327
why the fuck he open his arms when he is trying his abobinations?
>>7777914
He has to spread his arms so that his tits stop crushing his gullet and he can swallow.
>>7774481
This one makes me real sad... She is prob. just doing her best with what she can get, they look very poor. That look from her husband, just real sad. Am I a faggot?
>>7768114
Oh my stars she is
>>7774481
This is every Filipino cooking video though.
>>7778219
I can't tell if it's truly a butter knife or not. but if it is I assume that's all people will let her have with the way she cuts stuff
>>7768247
>>7774414
DING DING DING
>correct
>>7774327
You know, you notice that many other youtube channels don't show the people eating the food after, they seemed kinda bias....
>>7777570
Yeah. Ja/ck/ would rather play video games and go out to eat than cook.
>>7774481
from the image, i thought it was bananer pudding with a bunch of vanilla wafers floating around in it.
i think i'd rather think that than the reality
>>7777159
Does he say this in a video?
>>7770635
>that condescending "okay?" like he's talking to a child
>holds an onion with a fork instead of cutting it in half
>those mediocre cooking skills with the confidence of a seasoned fine-dining chef
I don't hate many people, but jack makes it so easy.
>>7777595
How does he not realize the batter is far too thick to work with? Why does he keep trying to batter the piece of chicken when it's obviously not going to work? Why would he upload something like this to youtube with his name on it?
There are so many questions.
