European here i just bought the best sauces. What do i do with it?
throw them away.
Poor them over some nice undercooked chicken
>>7052192
>>7052190
mix them with this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kU4z9friCAk
>>7052202
Can someone please make a gif of that little jig he does at 5:00?
>>7052375
Daily reminder that Joey betrayed his followers and hence his posts died out. It wasn't because of mods or anything else. You cannot stop the Ja/ck/ you pathetic faggot
I'll leave this here
https://www.periscope.tv/jakatak4/1lDxLZlrVbqGm
>>7053183
>'I love fire'
>wants to napalm all of Palestine
What a sick fuck, probably wants to see children burning alive
>>7052367
>gifs
do you have any idea how easy it is make webms? it's 2015, man!
2015!!
are Master Cu/ck/ Jack and his gray haired friend swingers?
or do they just get together to watch some bulls have their way with their wives? do they have a shed they go to when the wives don't let them watch?
>>7053202
These are important questions that deserve to be investigated.
On another note, Ja/ck/ is going to be releasing some sort of Beef Jerky although he says it's made by someone else... so I don't know why he would brand it. Anyway, someone please set his stupid van on fire.
>>7052190
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bYPR0NAroI
>"I've got the whole thing. The whole leg. Really!"
>"It's boneless too"
Its been fun cu/ck/s. What's the fastest and most painless way of suicide?
>>7053252
the parsley when it was plated up killed me
>>7053205
yeah he was trying out some jerkys on his famous award winning cooking show and said that he knew the guy who made them and that they used his sauces on them
the jerky was tough as leather though but they will benefit from Jack's professional tips to make their product easier to bite into
>>7052201
sauce on which episode that was
I've been hung over all day and have just been watching all his videos on youtube for some reason
>>7052202
>fa
>>7053274
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eO6e5k6Vvnc
>>7052191
The only answer
>>7053252
This...does not look terrible at all.
subtle ja/ck/ thrad
wp op
>>7053339
TOP KEK
>>7053356
how about a montage of how he cracks eggs?
>literally punches it
I wonder how many times that's backfired
>>7053356
>that technique
Anyone have the video where he tries to make turkey gravy?
i feel sorry for him and his family
what percent of their annual diet comes from the wal-mart frozen food section?
>>7053356
DUAL WIELD
>>7052367
why does he eat everything like he's about to deepthroat a cock?
>>7053404
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e_IbyC7suoU
Wasn't hard to youtube cooking with jack gravy, jesus
>>7053384
Its flawless.
>>7053582
wtf is with his gay little intro things, FUCK I HATE THIS FAT CUNT WITH HIS SHIT RECIPES
but fuck me, i could rim that man's asshole all day long
>>7052202
>this isn't enough for dinner for me
>no really jack
>>7053252
>he gives a WA LA at 3:19 followed by a BEAUUTIFUL
That's two WALAs I've seen Jack give in the past couple of days. The ride really never ends.
>>7053671
this post took a sharp turn
did not see that coming
>>7053356
Why the fuck can he not even cook bacon right. Jesus Christ it's still half raw. And it's not just him, that shitty "enchilada" video that some woman made, the ground beef is still fucking pink.
>>7053748
>farkin joocy brah
>>7053171
We really need a decent punished Joey shop.
>>7053924
fuck off back to your containment board, underageb&
>>7053924
Can someone post the video where he literally puts some cake mix with a dead fly in it into a saucepan? Been trying to find it for so long
>>7053983
It's the Balushi one that has the hot Rusky milf in it
>>7052201
Pro Tip: Just throw it in the microwave for a minute! It won't dry out!
>>7052201
is this chicken from one of his videos? if so, which one is it from?
>>7054170
yeah i noticed just after i posted, whoops!
When someone call their product ''the best ____ ever'' you can be 100% certain that it wont be the best ever
>>7053280
that's how it's pronounced dipshit
>>7053983
I actually made a webm of that yesterday but the thread died just after I posted it.
>>7053252
He honestly didn't fuck this up compared to his other stuff.
>>7053252
Is that.... overcooked?
>>7054476
Holy shit, he cant even beat the eggs properly
>>7054450
it's pronounced f-ow
>>7053370
Punches with the ring he never takes off and probably never cleans
>>7052190
Has anyone actually tasted it? If so, tell
>>7054778
No it isn't you fucking retard.
>F-ur
Now fuck off back to your Chinese pedophile cartoons.
>>7054476
>that half beaten egg
>some water or something
>more egg white, why
>is that OH DEAR GOD
I live in kansas city and no euro will ever fucking know how good this BBQ is
I pity you
>>7055531
Yeah because Europeans just disintegrate when crossing the US border
>>7054882
One anon did buy it and he said it tasted like sweet ketchup mixed with liquid smoke jello
>>7055609
I flew to DC from London a few years ago. As soon as we crossed into US waters, all of the Europeans started convulsing and smoke started billowing out of their mouths. A few seconds later they all exploded into clouds of dust.
I nearly didn't make it, but my mum lived in New York for a few years which by American ethnicity rules makes her Italian American or something and that was enough for me to survive. I did need to be rushed to hospital on landing where they gave me some bandages, which I'm still struggling to pay the bill for now, plus tip.
reminder:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUMiZKyM6AA
>>7052367
here you go faggot
>>7055649
what the fuck
>>7055649
>>7055818
>york sharp witty
Let's not forget his amazing onion rings.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3auTtyLdi8
>>7055924
>This recipe is a little funky
No Jack, you just fucked it up, once again.
>>7052202
>This time on the coughing with Jack Show
>>7054476
did he add yeast ?
>>7053252
You know what? Good job, Jack.
>>7056750
>put a ton of things into a tray
>cook it for set amount of time
>you didnt fuck up good job!
its still over cooked but its like youre congratulating a retard for using the toilet
>>7055620
Spoken like a true American.
Annuit cœptis!
>>7054476
thats an authentic russian rynok food recipe
>>7056775
does it both anyone else how big that big of chips is and how few come out?
the christian or the muslim, you choose
>>7055924
>ive been reading audible books all year long
>>7056779
Not as much as the color of the meat does...
>>7055818
>when your mom is done carving the me, you can suck up all the juices
>>7056872
So did anyone else notice that Jack is essentially a real life version of Cooking with Henry? Sad.
>>7056775
>>7056872
>This video is not done right. He screws the recipe up in this video.
Why does he write like a 10 year-old?
>>7057016
>4 simple sentences
>uses the word video in each one
I get what you mean.
>>7056775
This is something I'd expect to be served in prison.
>>7055649
What really pissed me off about that one wasn't that he fucked them up but that he knew so little about the thing he was cooking that he didn't fucking realise it.
If you're going to pretend to teach others how to make Yorkshire puddings you should as a fucking minimum know what they look like and how to pronounce the name.
Goddamn it.
>>7056775
Milk? What the fuck?
>We believe in your product
>We just don't believe in you
>>7052190
Eat them after you get cu/ck/'d and then buy the gallon sized versions
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXs3eq68ZjE
Here's where he shows you how to crack an egg
>>7057371
How does he not know how to crack an egg? How? Fucking how?
>>7055924
What does this guy actually do for a living?
He doesn't seem very bright.
>>7053339
Is it bad that I actually want to try that bread loaf he just stuffed with cheese and butter?
>>7057371
those eggs are so white they probably get bleached before they sell them
Why the fuck would anyone buy cheap eggs
>>7057445
poverty
>>7057371
Was that a real advertisement in the middle of the video, or was I having some kind of seizure?
>>7057445
I don't know where you're posting from, but eggs are washed in North America before being sold. They look nicer and there's very little chance of disease but they don't last as long.
>>7057312
>>7052190
>the best the best the best the best
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XTte01kdG_k
>>7057371
>"I try to stay away from pasta for my health"
I've witnessed this man mix heinz beans with mayonnaise and call it a salad. Pasta is not the issue.
>>7055649
>YorkSHIRE
Could he not google what he's cooking and just get a good idea in his mind what it's supposed to look like?
>>7057933
I thought someone had added that after the fact for comparison.
>>7053580
Wishful thinking
>>7052190
Send jack a vid of you cumming in the jars
>>7052191
This.
>>7052190
>I bought some stuff.
>I didn't have a clue what to do with it.
>Why did I buy it?
>>7057890
>mfw
>>7057644
My favorite part of his videos is when he makes some really sugary dessert than says "I'm just going to try it and send the rest off to my friends!"
Yeah, sure buddy. It's no wonder you have diabetes.
>>7058180
>I-it's from all the pasta!
Seriously, Ja/ck/, you're diabetic because you're a pathetic piece of shit that can't control his food intake.
>>7057644
>>7057890
Oh Jesus why?
>>7058209
>all that mayo
holy fuck how is this man not dead?
>>7058220
>Ja/ck/ is diabetic with a BMI approaching 50
Don't worry he doesn't have much time left
>>7058220
desu we put roughly that much mayo in the Russian salad we make
>>7058209
>>7058284
this tЬh faм
Who is gonna die first? Him or Sara? I say Sara since many comments state she has been ill recently.
>>7058357
i feel bad for sara. She seems very nice but she's being force fed by her husband and if she doesn't get enough food now to satisfy her apatite, she'll parish. It's like heroin
>>7058357
>>7058365
>tfw came here to laugh at Jack's culinary massacre and now I'm depressed from being reminded of Sara
>>7058357
Sara barely survived her last hospital visit... she had to be sent to a hospital with equipment that could handle her weight (not even kidding, she needed special heavy-duty equipment to shake water out of her lungs). Odds are that her next illness will end her.
>>7058424
source?
>>7058460
thanks
>>7058434
That fucking denial on his face.
>>7057245
Do all fat guys wear this hat?
>>7057582
>you will never be one of jack's three friends and party with him in his sauna
>>7058365
>she's being force fed by her husband
Legit? Source on that?
>>7053666
It's beautiful
>>7057431
I've had something really similar and it's pretty good honestly. Not good for you, but tastes pretty good.
Return it, return it right now
>>7059259
>Proverbs 30:7-9
try putting your sauces on some chicken tendies.
>>7059259
>HFCS
in the trash
>>7059288
>Proverbs 30:7-9
7
“Two things I ask of you, Lord;
do not refuse me before I die:
8
Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
give me neither poverty nor riches,
but give me only my daily bread.
9
Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
and say, ‘Who is the Lord?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
and so dishonor the name of my God.
The fuck does this have to do with sauce?
>>7052367
that fucking face, that fucking neck, that fucking tongue....
jesus fucking christ, Ive never seen such a revolting image
>>7059327
Here's his wife using the tongue out method of eating from the same video.
>>7054476
what the hell was that thing
>>7055458
My Vietnamese girlfriend and her entire family say it just like Jack, so I'm going with that man. As hard as it is to agree with Jack...
>>7055781
Nicely jigged, anon
>>7059259
Someone got the nutrition facts?
Really interested to see how much sugar is actually in this.
>>7060108
Here you go fampai
>>7060116
>as seen on YouTube
>Jakatak69
Fuck this fat faggot is a hyprocrite.
Remember him talking shit about restaurants making claims such as "world famous" or "the best in ...." yet he makes some shitty flavoured slime and claims it is the best you'll ever taste.
>>7053578
>>7060181
Don't forget that he also choked his older son, thinks reading is stupid, and wants to nuke palestine.
>>7059325
Two things I ask of you, Jack;
do cook the chicken or I die:
Keep salmonella and bean salad far from me;
give me neither raw buffalo nor sauces,
but give me only my daily bread.
Otherwise, I may have too much and get diabetes
and say, 'Who is the kek?'
Or I may become youtube cook,
and so dishonor the cuisines of the world
>how do you like your onions
>just drown them in butter faм
>>7060449
>whole stick of butter
>for what looks like half an onion
>rachel ray "look at me i'm a real cook now!" cookware
Jack is the best troll.
>>7060468
proceeds to use salsa which probably contains both onions and garlic
>>7058365
>force fed
what?
>>7060468
>no onions, no garlic
manchild.
>>7057644
Seems to be quite common amongst fat Americans to mix anything with mayonnaise and call it salad. Not a pop at America, there are disgusting lard creatures everywhere - but this particular trend is one I've only noticed Americans follow.
>>7060366
link and time stamp for these things
>>7060673
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t30IKGKvokQ
He talks about his son and the palestine thing somewhere in this vid, not sure where though.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qei3jXCrxr0
That's the one about reading. He talks about a lot of stupid shit on that same channel, like how being gay is a choice and he chose to be straight.
>>7060753
>literature is so lame, right guys?
>i'm such a guy
Also that fucking retarded giggle when his brother says reading sucks (because he thinks it's inefficient or something)
>>7060753
That podcast is worth a full view, it really shows what kind of clown Jack truly is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvqwG5aT9rI
new Ja/ck/
>>7060811
>turkey literally splits in half
>>7060811
>>7060879
Not undercooked for once.
*golf clap*
>>7060811
cu/ck/ meet up
>>7057890
delete this
Doesn't he have some serious health problems?
Made some video about red meat. Fucking lmao his diet is so terrible it's killing him but can't manage to read for half an hour online about nutrition.
>>7060116
>11g out of 19g is sugar
So about 58% of the contents of that bottle is pure sugar....
Anyone notice the dumb expression on his face all the time? Looks like he has just been donkey punched.
>>7061228
>This is what human emotions look like, right?
>>7061228
jack withoud beard speculation
>>7061296
Why speculate when you can live the dream?
>>7058209
I think this is probably the worst thing he's ever made. With his other recipes, I can at least laugh, but I can seriously feel my gag reflex triggering when I watch this, all jokes aside.
Absolutely disgusting.
>>7058209
Dry heaved twice during this.
This is revolting.
>>7061318
Salad night is in fact an act of terrorism
>>7058209
Anyone got the link for this video?
I think he deleted it.
How hard would it be to kill jack and get away with it? I'd like to stab him or choke him on some food, is this viable? Will police eventually catch me?
>>7061340
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUW_bXll6YM
here you go buddy
>>7061360
Chirst, even the other salads were deplorable.
This is what a macaroni salad should look like.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jEo9VXYVrxs
Not.. Whatever the fuck that was.
>>7058321
Those tits on the right though.
>>7060753
he would probably undercook the palsetinians, even with napalm.
>>7061228
>>7061450
lol
>>7061450
>>7061450
kek
>>7061360
>kept his mom in the video anyway
fucking disrespectful manchild
>>7061450
lel
>>7061523
Relax man, it's not like honouring your father and mother is one of the ten commandments and the guy claims to be super Christian.
>>7060405
holy shit i'm crying
Who else Ja/ck/in' it?
>>7060753
The kid probably had the anger and drug problems because he had to eat Jacks fucking food.
>>7062862
If he ate Ja/ck/'s food he would probably be dead or in a coma.
>>7060811
Even the dog is overweight.
>>7061184
Yeah, he had a stroke and blamed it on all the coffee and energy drinks he was drinking.
>>7058209
that fucking cutlery with the hole in the handle. i can just imagine his piggy little eyes bulging with excitement when he saw those in the store. every decision he makes seems to have been made by an 11 year old.
>>7058434
i make cheesecake about once a year because it's phenomenally unhealthy. cream cheese, cream, butter. but you really don't need much sugar. the ingredients are super rich to begin with. what he put in just looks completely inedible to me.
>>7058535
you're drawing the wrong comparison between Ja/ck/ and Tyrone. The important thing isn't that they're both fat, the important thing is they're both completely brain dead and incompetent.
>>7058434
>unironically using a cake mix called "classic yellow"
>>7058535
is that nigger from snatch?
>>7052190
Just fucking drop that shit in a dumpster and run
>>7057371
I like how he is so delusional that he thinks the food network would sign him
nigga fedoras dont buy themselves
>>7058321
I'd bang the fatty
>>7065109
we all would, we all would
>>7060753
About 25 minutes he talks about how his son started smoking pot and how it was his fault because he pushed his son into interning at a computer shop and that's where he "learned to smoke pot".
What the fuck. He almost starts crying.
>>7052190
Drench your next meal in bbq
>>7060753
https://www.instagram.com/gshock_cali/
gg jack
Cook some food and use the sauce, love the sauce. No homo
>>7053356
savage
>>7056775
>>7053748
>cured bacon
>raw
>>7065620
>no homo
U want sum raw juicy meat boi
so this is jack's first wife who he says beat him, right?
>>7059408
Jesus all that neck fat.. how much bodyfat do you need to have before you body starts shoving it around your throat?
>>7066053
Yeah, she looks like a slut. How the hell did Jack get her?
>YOOOOHOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HO...HOODEEDOODEEDOOOO
>The alarm wakes me up. I wipe the sleep out of my eyes
>The sweet purr of Tammy's C-PAP machine is comforting, it beckons me back to sleep
>No, I must wake up, today is the day
>I better check on Jack Jr...
>Jack's not in his room...it suddenly hits me that he spent the night at one of his football friends' house
>I've been worrying lately, he's been hanging out with colored folk, they might try to peer pressure him into trying the devil's lettuce
>I'm worrying about nothing, I've raised Jack to be a good man. Never to hit a woman!
>Shower and shave, using my trusty kit from Harry's Razors
>I decide to wear a shirt quoting 1 Corinthians 13:4-0, Jesus will respect my dedication
>Mosey through my hall of hats, decide on a classic little number featuring the character Dedpole, he's a popular guy among the kids
>I must prepare for the chili cook off, this is my calling. I gave up DJ'ing for this.
>Head to the local Kroger to gather my bountiful canned ingredients. Nobody else understands that THIS IS WHAT I DO, if you're going to criticize me on canned items, you're in the wrong place friend.
>The judges will never see my secret ingredient coming
>I've been saving a year old brisket coated in coffee grounds for this purpose, my Christ has commanded it
>Pour every bit of 26 minutes into assembling my chili masterpiece, no one else at the cook off will have dedicated their day as I have
>Tammy finally wakes up and removes her C-PAP mask and gets ready for the chili bowl cook off
>We head over to the football field, Jack is there with his melanin enhanced friends. One of them is giving me dirty looks; I think he's dealing marijuana cigarettes
>I hand my masterpiece to the lovely woman governing this event and she explains that all of the folks present will taste and judge. This will provide fair results as everyone tasting gets a voice (so she tells me).
>>7066634
>Christ bellows into my ears "BLASPHEMY!"
>Why aren't 3 neutral judges allowed at this event? I don't trust the opinion of these homely people with their heretic taste buds. They probably don't even support napalming Palestine.
>I urge Jack Jr and Tammy to vote for what they feel is the best chili, I WILL NOT stoop to the level of telling family and friends to vote for my chili.
>No one has the palate to appreciate freezer aged brisket
>No one here understands the complexity of canned beans and sauce
>This ruse of a contest has been a farce from the start
>I know in my enlarged heart that I am the true winner, and that my chili can bring warring nations together. The love is in the freezer burn.
>Jesus has told me I must infiltrate a high school chili cook off the following week to exact my vengeance via passive aggressive insults to children.
>These people think recipes off the Internet are good? BLASPHEMY!
>Where are the award winners? WHERE ARE THEY?
>I end up leaving extremely disappointed. I await Jesus' command to lead me to my next location for the next highly awaited episode of Jack on the Go.
>Such is the life of a Youtube cooking god
Don't mean to spam, just wanted to share this on another Jack thread
what i don't get is how he's been doing his cooking show for 8 years, but he's still SO BAD at cooking. he never learns. he never improves.
those yorkshire puddings. jesus.
>>7060811
"It's burning my meat!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ok4cM6WTA5E
Holy shit, how have I never seen this guy on youtube, who the fuck uses that much cheese in pasta, and calls that shit lasagna.
I bet that fat fuck ate both those foil trays of pasta to himself.
>>7060811
Holy shit, this entire process. They get so exasperated by a fucking turkey.
>>7066666
>>7066666
>Lasagna video
>I'm going to add the hot macaroni
>Add penne
SO FUCKING TRIGGERED
>>7066666
'Lazy man's guide to obesity'
'that's more like a glorified spaghetti'
>>7066666
>penne
>lasagna
nice quints
>>7065109
which one?
>>7061378
Comparing King Ja/ck/ to Chef John is like... I don't know.
>>7066666
those quints
hail satan
>>7066634
>>7066636
>>7066666
I went from laughing to just being fucking mad, dammit Ja/ck/
>>7065123
I really wanna put my member in her asshole. Fat chicks love anal, probably because they take shits 3x the size of my wang, mang. They're conditioned for fast ass action.
>>7060753
when he breaks down after mentioning the smoking pot thing is hilarious
RAGE ISSUES
maybe cuz you are such a fuck. probably controlling and miserable to be around, and having to eat that terrible food.
>>7066930
His first son sounds fine, Jacks language is absurd
>addicted to marijuanna
>kicked him out of the house at 16 after he 'raged' so Jack chokes him until he has a nosebleed and says he wanted to kill him
>says his son never "raged" in the presence of Jack Jr because he didn't want to upset his little brother
Kinda sad desu, Jack seems like he's mentally retarded and probably fucked up his sons entire life for no reason. So a 16 year old was angry and smoked pot? Welcome to reality, that's fucking everyone at that age you slob.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9wY5YLlG6lw
>>7060753
I like how Jack's retarded brother who hates reading and painting is like a sort of intellectual titan among his peer group. Check out his book (yeh he wrote a book) on Amazon and you'll see that he can't write worth shit.
>>7067154
Desuanon I fucking hate you
>>7067200
Go to bed Jack.
>>7058209
What is even the point of that.
It's baked beans with more onions, vinegar, oil, and fat.
Why not just make good baked beans?
>>7067238
Because he wanted a salad
>>7067196
Really worthless comment without a link or a title or anything
>>7067393
fuck off jack, go have another stroke
>>7067302
THAT JUST RAISES FURTHER QUESTIONS
>>7059408
I would kek Jack, make him watch while I plow her in the a$$.
>>7067666
>>7061450
top kek
Jack Scalfani here, from GiveMe Stroke Entertainment.
As you can see, I have made a semi-decent omelette, but I think we can make it better.
Let's dump out half a container of salsa on that badboy.
Now watch me consume it for the necessary nutrients to fuck up my next dish
Jack Scalfani OUT.
Who would you rather have cook you dinner /ck/?
Jack the walking heart attack
or
Gay Ferrari
![451395878-jack-scalfani-todd-english-and-johnny-gettyimages[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/q3FSBgr.jpg "451395878-jack-scalfani-todd-english-and-johnny-gettyimages[1].jpg")
Daily reminder that Ja/ck/ has cooked for famous chefs like Todd English
>>7068160
are you kidding? i'd feel extremely privileged and lucky to have guy fieri cook for me.
totally serious.
