1. to be a cis woman
2. lots of money
3. the ability to heal others

>to be 1000000 times stronger than i currently am
>to be indestructible
>to be 25 forever

>>690325254
1. More wishes
2. More wishes
3. Not be called a faggot

>>690326250
only fags wish for more wishes, fag

1. Trump loses
2. Summerfags leave
3. Always get dubs

>perfect human condition for myself, evolving to fit every situation without altering basic appearance
>true immortality
>limitless fiscal wealth no matter my situation.

>>690326250
You're not getting any of those
Faggot

>>690326429
shut up jerry :(

>>690325254
to have 3 more wishes
to have my wishes answered
to be able to wish wishes

>>690326460
>summerfags leave

you'd be on that train too bernout

>>690325553
you will become a CIS woman but never live past 30
you will gain large amounts of wealth but you do not have the password to the account and will heal others, but die slowly as you do this

>>690326624
Based

>>690326745
I said money, not wealth

>>690326250
instead you will be called a "Nigger" for the rest of your life

1. To become a god.
2. Be omniscient
3. Unlimited power

>>690326902
and money you have received

>>690325254
1.Undo everyones wishes,excluding this one
2.Immortality
3.No one can wish for anything and if they do nothing happens

To divide by zero
for a wish that can't be granted
that this wish never happened

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>>690326934
I'll take it

>>690327411
Done.

1.Never have anything oppose my will.
2. Control over my will.
3. Wish having anything else i will want for the rest of forever.

>>690327359
/thread

>>690326934
>Auto street cred

Fuck it

i become an immortalfag
10 dollars
one jar of butter

>>690325254
1) Happiness
2) GF
3) Friends

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>>690325254
> Make everyone on /b/ get a girlfriend and loss their virginity.
> Make all /b/tards move out of their moms basement and find a real home for themselves.
> Make every last one get a job and finally leave 4chan behind.
these are my hopes for us

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>>690325254
Ageless immortality.
The ability to retain a sense of enjoyment in any activity.
The power to enter and leave fictional universes as a cute girl.

You can't stop me. I will forever live in cute SoL anime as a cute girl doing cute things.

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>>690328217
You will have happiness but you will never own anything else
Your Girlfriend will leave you
And you shall receive every season of Friends

>>690325254
>For All other anons wishes to be denied
>For my wish to stay permanent
>For you to grant no more wishes to anybody else

1. I wish for your freedom.

>best case scenario he rewards me with the other two wishes
>even if he doesn't, i got out of this entire debacle without him going Bedazzled on my ass

>2.5 milion money of the strongest currency available every month in my bank account forever.
> instant teleportation wherever I want
> unable to age after my 27th year

>>690330113
you get two extra wishes

>depression
>inability to talk to women
>no money
Oh wait I already have those! I'm a winner!

To have what I need, when I need it.
To always know the results of any action I could take.
To be able to do whatever I am trying to.

to be dream me, a furry bitch
live incredibly long, with very little effects of aging that are cosmetic only
to have an easy life (plenty of money, no worry of losing it or hassle like being experimented on by a govt)

1) My Uncles cancer is cured
2) My family moves to a three bed room apt
3) I find 1000 dollars.

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As many wishes as I want without any twists or prices, only what I wish for, no more, no less than what I ask for, only what I ask for and nothing more.
Immortality, to be physically and mentally immortal, nothing else else, I wish to live on forever and never die, nothing more, nothing less, without pain, keeping my physical body and brain intact for all time, without aging, without changing
To be the greatest, most respected bodybuilder, with a admired physique that never ages like pic related, that is maintained throughout all of my immortality exactly like pic related, from head to toe.

>>690325254
I only really want one wish

I wish I had any value too anyone

This faggots uncle dies three times
>>690331564

>>690325254
>to always have enough money in my debit card for anything I buy in any currency
>to be able to enter other dimensions and universes
>to have any superpower I want, whenever I want (super speed, super strength, ability to manipulate and create fire, ect.)

>>690325254
1.-that my book becomes popular
2.-a for a dodge challenger
3.-transform into a saiyan

>>690326666
QUADS MUSTN'T GO UNCHECKED

Omnipotence x 3

1. To win every contest, feats of strength, door prize, lottery, competition, engagement I enter.

2. To live a healthy, nice and fun life for two hundred years when I die peacefully.

3. To get free train, plane and boat tickets any time I wanted anywhere I wanted.

>>690327066
>To become a god
You become a shitty god, like the god of toast, ya fucking nigger
>Be omniscient
Only about toast, and the processes/techniques involved in toasting bread, faggot
>Unlimited power
Electrical power, to just your toaster, you are the god of toast and nothing else, bitch.

>>690326429
real Alphas wish for more genies

>>690333174
How old are you?

>690333333

>>690325254
1. Enough money to pay off every single debt there has ever been, and then still have enough to make me the richest person in the world.

2. Mastery over every musical instrument in the world.

3. An infinite supply of genies.

for the genie to fall in love with me.

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>>690325254
1.I wish she won't scream or run
>never make the others

That my dick tastes like chocolate
Ejaculate $50 bills
Look 25 forever

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>>690326666
Diabolic quads always say the truth

>>690325553
>1. be a cis woman
you are obese and bedridden
>2. lots of money
100,000 monopoly dollars
>3. ability to heal others
nobody wants to get close enough to let you try

>>690334015
All your money is in ancient currency that no nation or system of government uses or will accept.
People will still call you a nerd when you play your instruments.
The genies are lazy assholes and don't grant any wishes. Also, the infinite genies create a black hole that destroys all existence.
Nice job, retard.
>>690334145
Really shitty chocolate.
The bills will come out in pieces, so you can't use them to buy anything, and the process is agonizing.
You look 25 but you're still ugly.

1 ) I wish that there is no God / Gods or form of deity in existence

2 ) I wish humans were all linked together in a giant neural network

3 ) I wish faster than light travel was physically possible.

>>690330546
>police start to get suspicious about the money you are getting because the same amount is desapearing from other accounts and bust your ass
>everytime you teleport you die and another you totally diferent appears where you wished to be
>die at age 27

>>690334588
Your 'neural network' also works with pain, both emotional and physical.
All the emotional/mental/physical pain being felt by all humans at any moment, will be added together, and every person feels that.
For example, if all 7 billion humans stub their toe, they all feel it, but for each human, so it's 7 billion times more painful for each person.

>>690325731
>to be 1000000 times stronger than I am
if you move, the energy density results in a black hole
>to be indestructible
you cannot eat, feel, see, get drunk, kill yourself, etc.
>to be 25 forever
the earth doesn't finish its revolution because it shoots out of orbit

>>690333818
old enough...

>>690335000
>old enough...
Your ellipses says otherwise, you fool.
Nice trips by the way.

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>>690335000
trips of truth

>>690335000
>>690335217
Samefag, the 'of truth' really gives it away.

1. Every human being alivd obeys my every command.

2. I gain every positive super power from every fictional series ever created.

3. Christy Mack does porn again.

>>690326250
>1. More wishes
but they are not granted
>2. More wishes
more wishes than less wishes
>3. Not be called a faggot
nobody calls you

>>690335353
Sorry, 'alivd' isn't a thing, so that wish is invalid.
Whose definition of 'positive?' Maybe the genie thinks that the ability to remove your own dick with a thought is the only positive ability, so you only get that, if there is any fictional character with that ability.
Oh and your girl only does porn of fetishes you find repulsive.

>>690335290
I never claimed I was not samefagging, faggot

>>690335353
1. Every human being alive obeys my every command.

2. I gain every positive super power from every fictional series ever created.

3. Christy Mack does porn again.

FIXED

>>690326460
>1. Trump loses
Drumpf wins
>2. Summerfags leave
Fallfags enter
>3. Always get dubs
you always shitpost

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>>690325254
For the the feels to go away

>>690335630
>I never claimed I was not samefagging
ok but ya boi
>>690335664
Too late, mate.
>>690335795
They are replaced with even worse feels.
I'm sorry, Anon.

>>690333827
you better feel bad about that roll Faggot

1. Make any person I want cum on command
2. The ability to control my own mind
3. Over all just nerve manipulation

1. Download any power from superpower wiki
2. World restarts from stone age.
3. Not be called a fag

>>690336027
They only cum one drop.
Can't you already control your own mind, autist?
Yeah you can only manipulate one nerve in each person's body.
>>690336065
The download will always be corrupt or fail
Nothing changes after the restart
I call you a 'faggot'

1. OP to finally get laid.
2. ???
3. Profit!

1. Every cis woman that I deem attractive wants a romantic relationship with me.

2. Everyone alive today thinks I'm the coolest, funniest person ever.

3. These wishes have no twists.

>>690336381
>using cis non-ironically
die, immediately.

>>690326531
>>perfect human condition for myself, evolving to fit every situation without altering basic appearance
implying evolution is on the scale of an individual organism
>>true immortality
true loneliness for infinite time
>>limitless fiscal wealth no matter my situation.
implying fiscal wealth could be relevant after the heat death of the universe

>>690336381
The woman want you, but for whateve reason, will never have you.
Zombies rise and eat you, they don't count as alive, they are undead.
Gotta' be more specific than 'twists', friend.

>>690336522
It's a valid term. In order to avoid twists, you gotta be real specific.
For once, dubs do not speak the truth

>>690325254
>I want the powers of "Q"

>

>

>>690336623
On the last point, I do not have to be more specific; twists are twists

>>690326624
You have an unlimited number of wishes without the guarantee that your wishes are granted.

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>>690335883
Why you do this , the feels!
fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

1. I become supreme leader of the world

2. I can have sex with any woman on command, and they always comply

3. Anita Sarkeesian becomes a radical meninist

1. The ability to read and control minds when I feel like it.
2. Perfect health.
3. Learn 5x as fast.

1.win the lottery atleast $50 million
2.have minor reality manipulation(full control and understanding)
3. everything in the world gets better everyone is happy, no more shitty lives.

>>690328848
Dayum.

>>690336749
>verb
>1.
>form into a bent, curling, or distorted shape.
Yeah, you do have to be more specific, cunt. No wishes for you, shut up.
>>690336918
It's OK m8, I'll take the feels back and give them to
>>690336749
...


>>690337004
You never feel like it.
Perfect health of only your left testicle, the rest stays the same
You learn five times as fast as a dead person

1. A double cheeseburger
2. Count to 9 on /b/ with + 8 different persons
3. The ability to convert matter in credits/cash for shitty online games

>>690337295
You win $50 million Zimbabwean dollars
You have minor control over a pocket reality
Everything gets better and everyone is happy (for now) because a pharmaceutical company has the whole world hooked on a new drug and soon they're raising the price to exorbitant levels. Great going.

1. I wish to be able to give myself any and all superpowers conceivable by man whenever I want
2. I become the unchallenged ruler of the universe
3.Intelligent alien life is abundant and exists relatively close to earth

>>690336929
Supreme leader, but not of this world. Of a crappy planet with no life.
The sex is always awful and you get diseases.
I won't change the Anita one because I'm not a cuck.
>>690337295
A more powerful reality bender comes from another universe and kills you, erases you from existence, and resets reality to the way it was before you made the wish

>>690337295
1. You win the lottery, but the money is contaminated and gives you cancer. The treatment costs $51 million and if you don't cure it you'll die in 3 years.
2. The cancer takes your legs and one of your arms. You can now manipulate the world in minor ways, instead of major ways like a normal human.
3. You use your shitty arm to kill yourself. Your mother stops worrying about you. Your father ceases to be disappointed in his failure of a son. Your crush feels a sudden weight lift off her shoulders when you stop bothering her. Suddenly, the world just seems a tiny bit better...

>be a cis woman
>live in wales how i want
>no wish twists or anything like that lmao

>>690332746
Debit card goes missing day one

First universe you travel to is of lemon juice and razorblades.

Activating a superpower halves your lifespan per second used.

>>690337666
I won't change these at all.
>>690337887
You never want to give yourself the powers.
Ruler of another universe with no life.
The aliens are hostile to us.
>>690338075
You're ugly as fuck
Wales is attacked by terrorists
The definition of twist is
verb
1.
form into a bent, curling, or distorted shape.

1. Every wish in this thread is granted exactly as every poster intended.

2. All twists that attempt to warp the wishes never happen.

3. This wish itself cannot be changed, challenged, etc.; i.e., this wish goes exactly as I intend

>>690327066
>1. To become a god.
god of things that disappear from the drier
>2. Be omniscient
you feel all the pain and pleasure all the time without rest, and more people are in pain
>3. Unlimited power
unlimited responsibility

>>690336381
>cis, adjective: denoting or relating to a molecular structure in which two particular atoms or groups lie on the same side of a given plane in the molecule
1. Every woman who is relating to that molecular structure will want a relationship with you. That's 0 people.
2. Everyone dies tomorrow.
3. Granted, they have the above misinterpretations instead. Oops.

>>690332746
Debit card falls into a fire
You enter the dimension but it vibrates at a different frequency and your heart won't beat properly, you die
You never want superpowers, so 'whenever i want' means you'll never get any.

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>>690337656
Thankyou faggot , much appreciated

1My dog to be the most powerful being in existence (more than god)
2me to be also powerful but not as much
3make the world a fantasy sci-fi with sexy bitches

You'd understand if you knew how kkkool my dog is

>I can pause time and move around/manipulate everything while time is paused
>My perfect idea for a video game is made and everyone praises it and me
>I become extremely attractive and smart

>>690337887
1. The first thing you do is to give yourself sharp pain in the back of your right testicle whenever you use another superpower.
2. You are a ruler and can measure anything in the universe, no contests
3. They are 1000 light years away from earth, its relatively closer than 2000 light years

>>690335353
Granted. "alivd" is not an adjective, so no one obeys your command.
Now you're made of nothing but protons, as that's the only superpower the genie finds positive. Good luck moving.
Christy Mack gets a sex change and does scat and piss porn with other trannies. Hey, the genie doesn't judge your fetishes.

>>690338563
Your dog keeps you trapped and rapes you in the ass all day
You can never escape because dog is more powerful than you.
>>690338634
Another time-pauser who is more experienced and powerful, finds you and cuts your dick off
>>690338818
nice one

>>690327359
>>>690325254 (OP)
>1.Undo everyones wishes,excluding this one
you can undo the wishing, but not the granting
>2.Immortality
only through your children, but you can only see them on monday
>3.No one can wish for anything and if they do nothing happens
instant world manic depression, no more dildos for you

Eternal happiness.
More absolute power than anyone else ever.
Invincibility.

Have at it buddy.

>>690334138
Granted. She won't scream because she has no vocal cords, and she won't run because her leg muscles have atrophied.

>>690339004
You didn't specify that you wished to have these things. They are all given to someone else, an evil person that uses them to terrorize the universe and create immense suffering.
>>690339059
What if that's the way he likes them?

>>690338928
Do I survive the dick severing and how long after the wish is granted does this happen?

>>690339176
Well done.

>>690325731
1000000 x 0 = 0

>>690339284
You see, it happens immediantely. The genie is actually a time-pauser.
The genie is a cute futa girl that wants to fuck you, but doesn't want your dick in her, so she removes your dick and rails you. She knows you won't pause time to stop her because you love and care for her, Anon.

>>690333653
>Win every contest
Can only join biggest faggot contest and you can't receive the prize
>Live for 200 fun years
time flies when you're having fun, and you spend your eternal afterlife in hell
>Free Tickets
Tickets are fake

>>690325254
Ban traps, fluff, and furr

>>690325254
>niggers be gone
>religion be gone
>mental illness be gone

That should fix the world just right.

>>690339496
The prize for the biggest faggot contest is suffering, and he can never recieve that, so he will never suffer.
He will spend the 200 years freeing souls trapped in hell and defeating satan
The tickets are really good fakes and nobody will notice

>>690339485
I'm fine with this. I guess I'll steer the attractive wish into a cute trap then

>>690339004
You are happy for forever, which means that you will last past the heat death of the universe and time itself. Even if you try to die, you'll experience agony, but you'll stay alive and be healed. Once you're floating through the abyss for eons, we'll see who's laughing.
You have more absolute power than anyone ever -- you're given 1000 copies of the movie Absolute Power from 1997. That's enough for dedicated fans.
You're invincible in that you are unconquerable, mostly because you never try to get in fights or challenge yourself. Any time you even argue with anyone, your opponent is visibly tortured for hours by a mysterious force (somehow broadcast via social networks and YouTube - even if you try changing your password, it doesn't work), meaning that even formerly friendly people avoid you. A small price to pay, I'm sure.

>>690327642
>1.Never have anything oppose my will.
you only will for increased toaster production
>2. Control over my will.
control over magnitude of your will
>3. Wish having anything else i will want for the rest of forever.
You only want more toaster.

>>690338656
>1
I can remove that teste, or just give myself immunity to pain
>2
Still kinda useful
>3
I can teleport there

>>690328209
>i become an immortalfag
unfortunately you become a toaster
>10 dollars
to buy a new toaster
>one jar of butter
to put on your toast

>>690339578
Ban them from where?
You didn't specify, so the genie bans them from reddit only.
>>690339729
'Mental illness' is no longer a thing, only because people thought the term was too offensive, so the concept of it doesn't exist, but it obviously still exists.
>>690339801
nice
>>690339999
Nice quads man, thanks for carrying on the toaster legacy
Wanna come over for toast sometime?

>>690339729
Niggers-be-gone, religion-be-gone, and mental-illness-be-gone are new pills marketed at (and force-fed to) only the most euphoric. They make those things disappear from your memory, your vision, and your psyche, but they give you debilitating nightmares about things like... niggers and Islam. What are those, anyway? Oh, and you have to consume three times as much, wear a fedora, and watch MLP during and after the force-feeding. There's always the brainwashing facility if you resist.

>>690328217
>>>690325254 (OP)
>1) Happiness
b/c you have a toaster
>2) GF
Gay Faggot
>3) Friends
your toasters are your friends

>>690340242
>rules on the fly

gay fucking thread.

saged

>>690340360
Alright, which one were you? I'm guessing
>>690339578

>>690340344
I wish for this faggot to stop it with the toasters

>>690340498
Another faggot continues the toaster legacy

>>690328497
>>>690325254 (OP)
>> Make everyone on /b/ get a girlfriend and loss their virginity.
toaster waifu counts
>> Make all /b/tards move out of their moms basement and find a real home for themselves.
the home is made of toasters
>> Make every last one get a job and finally leave 4chan behind.
job in a toaster factory where you check your ebaumsworld

>>690340644
shit...

>>690340498
He switches to waffle irons

>>690328616
>>>690325254 (OP)
>Ageless immortality.
as a toaster
>The ability to retain a sense of enjoyment in any activity.
because you always think of your toasters
>The power to enter and leave fictional universes as a cute girl.
toaster-chan
>You can't stop me. I will forever live in cute SoL anime as a cute girl doing cute things.
toaster-chan

>>690329523
>>>690325254 (OP)
>>For All other anons wishes to be denied
instead they get a toaster
>>For my wish to stay permanent
you want a toaster
>>For you to grant no more wishes to anybody else
they only truly want a new toaster

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>>690325254
1. Asa Akira fleshlight
2. Google Fiber internet
3. Charmin ultra soft

>>690330546
>>2.5 milion money of the strongest currency available every month in my bank account forever.
you get the new diamond-back 2.5 milion toaster
>> instant teleportation wherever I want
you also bring your toaster
>> unable to age after my 27th year
because you commit suicide by toaster

>>690331024
but you have your toaster

>>690325254
1. 4chan reverts back to how it was in 2009
2. unlimited supply of fresh cooked chicken tendies
3. when i wake up in the morning my room and me are automatically clean and never have to wash or do any of that

1. Rope
2. Chair
3. My suffering

>>690331084
>To have what I need, when I need it.
you need a toaster
>To always know the results of any action I could take.
you could only make toast
>To be able to do whatever I am trying to.
you are trying to toast bread

>>690331416
>to be dream me, a furry bitch
your toast is furry too
>live incredibly long, with very little effects of aging that are cosmetic only
you are a piece of toast, fifteen minutes is incredibly long
>to have an easy life (plenty of money, no worry of losing it or hassle like being experimented on by a govt)
toast doesn't need to pay taxes

>money
>the ability to attract any woman I want
>all the dope

>>690331564
>1) My Uncles cancer is cured
into several delicious slices to go with your toast
>2) My family moves to a three bed room apt
the three beds in the room are made of toast
>3) I find 1000 dollars.
you can only use it to buy a toaster

>indestructible, literally unkillable

>>690343029
Enough, Anon.
I started this toast fiasca, but you've plunged it into madness.
I have re-wired all of your toasters. They are going to explode in 60 seconds, and there is nothing you can do to stop it.
My anime girlfriend and I have poisoned your toast, and you will soon degenerate into a normal, floppy piece of bread. I'll finger Miss Anime, and her cum will spill on you, and you'll become soggy, then I can wash you down the sink, and you will never hurt anyone again.

>>690325254
Billion dollars, all niggers eliminated, and perfect health.

>>690331875
>As many wishes as I want without any twists or prices, only what I wish for, no more, no less than what I ask for, only what I ask for and nothing more.
you only wish for a new toaster
>Immortality, to be physically and mentally immortal, nothing else else, I wish to live on forever and never die, nothing more, nothing less, without pain, keeping my physical body and brain intact for all time, without aging, without changing
you are a toaster
>To be the greatest, most respected bodybuilder, with a admired physique that never ages like pic related, that is maintained throughout all of my immortality exactly like pic related, from head to toe.
you have a label of a bodybuilder on you and nobody respects bodybuilders

1. Aliens blow up planet with laser without anyone seeing it coming.
No need for further wishes.

>>690332293
You are now extremely valuable, and, consequently, you are kidnapped. This sends the world into a nuclear war and you die. And then toast, or some shit, idk.

>>690338352
Looks like no one has tried to twist this one yet

>>690338188
>Activating a superpower halves your lifespan per second used.
Doesn't this technically make him immortal? I know that we don't live in a universe where dividing things into half their original size forever is possible, but we're talking about wishes and shit.

>>690343944
The planet they blow up is Mercury.
>>690338352
Posters are just pieces of paper on the wall, they have no intentions.
Twist: verb 1. form into a bent, curling, or distorted shape.
So that's not valid, 'twist' is not a valid term to use, you lose.
>This wish itself cannot be changed, challenged, etc.; i.e., this wish goes exactly as I intend
You said 'this wish.' Each of your wishes was a seperate wish, so wish 3, which states 'wish 3 can not be manipulated' does not mean your first and second cannot be manipulated.

>>690344419
You're terrible at this, you faggot, using the same pathetic excuse over an over as a rebuttal. Invalid

Infinite wishes.
Death to remaining Jews.
World peace.

>>690325254
To be a fucking Vault boy

>>690344328
Actually, now that I think about it, he probably meant it halves the age that you'll be when you die, meaning that after about eight seconds, he'd die.

1. $1 billion USD in pennies
2. death
3. set you free

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1. OP to fuck a girl
2. OP to not suck 13 dicks a day
3. For the two sweps needed to complete the Hobo Pack in gmod to be real.

Now fuck off.

>>690344849
Wow, I liked the part where you actually used some logic instead of just insulting me and claiming that you're right.
Maybe try not using the word 'twist?' I hope you're acting out of retardation, anger, and pride, and don't actually think that what you said was ironclad.
Either way, my taking down of your third wish was certainly valid, because you said 'this wish', which refers to your third wish.
>>690345373
A girl fucks OP.
OP sucks dick 14 times a day.
I don't know what a swep is so you can have that one.

>>690344419
Can't believe that I didn't specify which planet.

>>690343595
>1. monopoly money
>2. only the ones that dont hate you
>3. the vision of perfect health for a starving ethiopian

>>690345476
Wait, I thought you said, "OP not to fuck a girl."
Uh, the girl is your mother.
>>690345498
Can't believe you're not being a butthurt child about it.
Congratulations, you win a planet where you can party with qt alien girls, who won't give you a disease because they are aliens.

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>>690345476
YEA HA HA HAAA SUCK MY LONG SLONG MOTHER FUCKER, TRYING TO TAKE MY WISHES MOTHER FUCKER HA!

Be immortal until i say so.

The ability Stop time.

I'll save my last one.

>>690346204
You say so right away.
You left out a 'to' in your time stop, so it's invalid.
The genie dies after the first two wishes, so your saved one is gone.

>>690343809
That's not what I wished for. 1. I wish for unlimited wishes that actually get granted when I make them without anything interfering with their creation or happening.
2. i wish any wish below this one and this one to not have any twists
3. I wish for any wish above this one and this wish to not have any twists
4. I wish for these wishes to be irreversible.
5. I wish that wishes that affect these wishes from happening in the first place are null and void.

>>690330722
2. I wish you have a happy life.
3. I wish you find true love with a girl genie.

1. No niggers in existance
2. Cure brothers autism
3. Penis reduction so I stop scaring women off when I strip down

>>690337882
>You win $50 million Zimbabwean dollars
I don't think it works like that, anon.

>>690346508
A wish is not a physical item, it can't twist.
But I will change your wishes. Also, you're not allowed more wishes, you already made your 3, so what you just did was invalid.

>>690337666
The double cheeseburger is cold, OP then proceeds to be a faggot and not comply, the games are actually alright, but not really all too noteworthy. And your mouth tastes a bit like toast for a minute.

>>690325254
1. I wish for you to transfer all your reality-altering powers to me, leaving you with none

All other wishes are irrelevant after that, and I proceed henceforth to live literally like a god, altering reality as I see fit, creating my own perfect world.

/thread

>>690331875
1: You don't want any wishes. The number of wishes you want is 0, so that is how many wishes you get.
2: An eternity of nothing. Not bad, not good. Just neutral, forever.
3: Sure, everybody loves you, but you don't care. You said yourself, you do nothing more than live. You don't feel good about how you look, you aren't happy that everybody loves you. All you do is live, and never feel.

>>690347220
Metaphorical twist retard.

>>690338075
You live in the country, nothing if not happens, and you die and everyone forgets you.

1. Make any girl orgasm by eye contact or look at her picture
2.Mind reading
3.know all languages

>>690347788
OP isn't the genie, he's just a messenger, informing you that you have 3 wishes. OP has no reality-altering powers.
>>690347919
I know you have a real boner for the word 'twist', you just love using it, but you should have specified. Genies love fucking you over with alternate meanings of the same word. Have you never seen a genie in a movie or book or anything? It's a thing they do very often.
You might wish to be taller, and the genie would make you 900 feet tall, but that's different than this.
Say you're infertile, and you wish to have kids. Then a few baby goats show up at your door. The genie fucked you over with alternate meanings, that's the same thing I'm doing, by saying your wishes are invalid because 'twist' can mean different things.
Relax, you seem to be actually getting upset at a /b/ thread. That's simply silly.
If you tell me that The Flash is the best superhero, I'll retract all of my wish 'twists', as you call them.

>>690333708
I laughed way too much at this. Its been an hour into my birthday and the laughter . Thanks anon

>>690338352
Since the wishes were contradictory and they can't override each other, the universe is destroyed as a result.

>>690348613
Aw thanks man
Happy birthday and toasts to you
>>690348693
Damnit, do you see what you losers have done?!

>>690348540
>OP isn't the genie, he's just a messenger, informing you that you have 3 wishes. OP has no reality-altering powers.
You dumb ass, that IS my wish to be told to the goddamned genie, VERBATIM. Now fucking get it done!

>>690338563
>dog hates you, creates more beings who are more powerful than you to force you into exile, and there are many sexy female dogs.

I want unlimited wishes

I want the new Zelda

I want the GTX 1080

>>690325254
1. Donald Trump dies (painfully)
2. People become smarter and more involved in politics
3. I do not age and live to be 500+

>>690325254
>Infinite Wishes
>Loliggaging
>To fuck a magical genie in the butt

>>690349117
/thread

>>690348810
ya boy the genie isn't here, you replied to OP and said 'you', what does that mean, use your noggin

>>690349094
1: He gets resurrected right in time for the election
2: The entire world goes into anarchy
3: You physically turn into a baby for the entire time


Also, stupid liberal

>>690348958
No one replied so I have no drawbacks

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>>690325254
1. Only die from physical injuries (Tolkien elves yo)
2. Poof away college debt
3. Free the genie, dibs on genie bro best pal

>>690325254
I wish for a nice paying job, some weed, and for there to be a 25% chance that a gumball will have a spider in it for anyone in the world

>>690349445
Kek fuck off cunt

>>690349094
leave

>>690348958
You didn't say that you wished for those things, you just told us that you wanted them.
Better yet, you did make the wishes, but you just wished to want those things, doesn't mean you have them.

>>690349117
You cum spiders

>>690349701
Ok well I wish for them now I have them no drawbacks gg wp I win

>>690349445
>He dies again
>The average IQ triples and there is world peace
>You stop acting like a spoiled child

>>690348958
Wishes create spiders

Zelda is a spider

You drive a large arachnid

>>690349117
>ask for more genies
>fuck every single one in the butt
>repeat

>privacy
>a woman who has always had such
>a lucrative and fulfilling job

>>690349094
> I do not age and live to be 500+
Fine, you won't age and live to be 500+.
Meaning, you won't do both of those things.

>>690349666
No

Also checked

>>690349094
>People become smarter and more involved in politics
How about you start first libericunt

>>690349896
Yeah, but I told you that you actually ended up just wishing to want those things, remember?

>>690349899
Liberals...

Do you think I am rich or something because I support Trump compared to Hitlary?

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>>690325254
>Unlimited lifetime income
>never age a day beyond 25 with the caveat that I can take my own life if I so choose
>immunity to all illnesses or life altering/threatening ailments/disabilities.

And thus, infinite shitposting became a reality.

>>690350081
it was a tl;dr situation

>>690349950
>privacy
only spiders will be with you
>a woman
is a spider in disguise
>job
you get fired

>>690350127
hair loss at age 25

>>690350126
No I just think your a cunt.

And I'm not a Liberal

>>690325254
1. 10 million dollars.
2. Master artist.
3. Master coder.

>>690350295
Joke's on you, ive been shaving my head since HS.