>>689063194
be home soon. love you heart emote kiss emote.

"Could I book an appointment for next week?"

>>689063194
Not working...
Am falling asleep. Nite brabe love you

How did you get my number creep

Or that big ass on the bottom

"I'm gay irl"

'Monday is fine by me x'

happy new year 2005

>>689063194

"The black and white one?"

"Oh....."
"I love you too, but as a friend..."

"Last night. I was flirting with this guy from my school. He's hot af. He saw me at the library in school and winked at me and his pants were so tight I saw he had a boner when he saw me. Then last night he was really horny that he started getting freaky in a group chat with our friends. They saw everything we said to each other." -girlfriend

"I feel"

I havnt received a message from the opposite sex in 2 years

>>689064499
*- my girlfriend

"Jump in a cab!!!"

Whos this?

"On*"

>>689063194
"Hi" kek fuck that bitch

" Oh okay, that's good oh yeah well that will be fun then."

>>689063194
Hei, Magnar er på vei for å hente Agnes. Er der ca 1910 :-) Tusen takk for at hun fikk være hos dere i ettermiddag!

Fuck off

>>689063194
MORE PICS OF GIRL!!!!

>>689063194
Ill be home in 1/2 hour.
From my aunt.

>>689063194
"I would neeeeeeever do that with you fuckhead, but you can fuck me in the ass instead ;)." Then turns out her brother had gotten on her phone and was pranking my ass

"i havent seen you in forever! <333 you disappeared from the earth what have you been up to lately??"

"people have been saying you moved out of state or you went missing, are you ok?"

I am very bad at texting and I never use facebook so people think I'm dead and people avoid me because I don't text or use facebook

how come social status has evolved into technology? facebook is gay, I use phone for calls/games/work and that's it, why are people such faggots nowadays when it comes to this shit?

Jimanji... best film ever! Xx

>>689064555
Witnessed. You ain't missing much mate.
>"Lmao, same place as this guy ha ha"

"We went from strangers to like close friends. Technically best friends . Unless you too cool to the be best friends lmao"

>>689063194
Please post nudes. I want.... No, I need them.

"For the last time stop stalking me and my daughter. I told you i'm going to make work of this if you keep this up you little prick.
You can keep making new accounts but you will be IP banned this time. Fucking shit"

Appearently someone doesn't like getting stalked.

wow yoy is going to pay my way? it's such an honor

>>689063194
who is she? do you have any more pics of her?

AHHHHHHH

>>689063194
She's hot.
More?

>>689063194
"Patrick, just a reminder that you have an informal chat with cancer lifeline tomorrow at 12pm, thanks Lisa." i didn't go. And this the only types of women who text me

"Lol sorry I was being dense"

>>689063194
"Baby? Wyd?"

>>689063194
OP you better start dumping her pics dammit!

WAITING FOR OP TO DELIVER

druunk as fucj (my gramma)

>>689063194
"you have a beautiful cock <3"

> At least once a week.

"I'm married to the sea"

>>689065671
OP is a faggot. He won't deliver pics of girl.

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Post screens faggots

Mine isn't interesting, I told a ugly girl her boyfriend probably ran away and she told me it's none of my buiseness.

You are litarely the sweetest <3
From my female roommate

Inb4 i have a gf

>>689065671
She's probably OP's sister. I doubt that he'll have nudes of her.

>>689063194
"Aww! She's so cute!"

>>689064519
not the MOST recent but I recently got a text from a girl that said the same thing

a picture of a knife with the word edgy in it

>>689065671
>OP posts original content
>just posts one image
Every fucking time!

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>>689066206
She's pretty cute anon.

"My dick is feeling up for the task. I'm gonna come over soon".

Yup i'm gonna get pounded again.

>>689065671
Try asking >>>/r/ for the rest of the set.

>>689063194
"Love you."

You know i really should be disappointed by what you said.

>>689066072
Why English and Dutch in a mix?

>>689065671
OP can't post any more pics, because he stole it from another website.

"I can see you from my window, leave or I'm calling the popo on yo ass nigga"

>>689066642
Cause for some reason certain people in my country think it's cool to randomly speak English.

I will tomorrow but it's time for me to sleep *kiss*

>>689063194
Can i come over?

it was from my sister, she was in the area and wanted to see how i am

Great

>>689063194
>Anon, i'm dumping you.
"k"

Spaghetti's for dinner
When you coming home?
(I'm currently fucking my associate atm)

>>689063194
>are you on your way home?

Sent from my wife about an hour ago.

>>689063907
Deep

>>689065671
OP abandoned his own thread like the giant faggot that he is.

>>689067337
was that your mom?

I wanna take a relationship slow, if u know what I'm trying to mean

Trying to ditch my girlfriend for this chick ;)

"I need to listen to all this music wth man
I LOVE YOU HONEYBEAR SOUNDS SO CUTE
I need to listen to this fuck
Why are you so sweet to me"

Aanabanabajajakajajj s jajjajajaj

>>689063194
"lol"

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"I rather have a Hardon"

>>689068159
wat?

Who are you and how did you get into my apartment last night?

>>689063194
I don't remember and I can't find it.

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>>689067666

>>689063194
Good night *heart emoji*

I will.

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Dubs decides

>>689069032
I am curious about backstory now

>>689068411
I told my gf that the album "I love you, honeybear" and "fear fun" remind me of her.

I'm here

>>689069080
Not actually interesting. She had an ACT today and I told her to tell me how it went.

>>689063194
"she asked if you were my daddy"

>>689069040
Keep talking nice to her

lol i posted it on 4chan againnnnn (:

You guys should just come kick it

>>689063194
"Lol"

That's all it says. Fml

>>689063194
>'How dare you texting me? I saw everything you scumbag'
gf, now kind of ex, I suppose

Try harder

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Go

"bb r u awake"

>>689070056
R u blue or gold

>>689063194
"he he merci : ) " (he he thanks)

>>689069878
Cheating?

last photo or im changing my number

"Pizza."

>>689070056
It truly is very ok if you fuck him now. Just take pictures so i can feel it.

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"Unrelated one of my favorite custy dogs just had puppies... they're brown and white border collies and I just about ground my teeth into dust"

Gotcha

>>689070056
holy fuck you're a boring cuck

>>689063194
I honestly cant rememeber, its been so many months now since i texted a girl..
>feelssofuckingbadman

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Yep

So what's the deal?!

ur coming on strong!

>>689070967
Stop being scum

Lol what are you doing tonight?

>>689065121
This is me 100%, kek! I in turn have no friends...

>>689071238
Fuck you, thundercunt.

> Did you give her a bath yet? You know to use the Dora shampoo right?

Go ahead, anon. Get married. It's fantastic.

I used to be in a band. My relationship to vagina is cleaning poo out of a tiny one now.

Your daughter is giving her bath water hugs and kisses
From my wife...god I wish she was dead

>>689071577
thats p cute tho

shopping tomorrowwwww??

5 minutes ago

I love youuu so much. Thank you for everything xxxxxx

"Non, chez Martin' hich is french for "No, at Martin's place".

"R u dying?"

>>689071833
Kys

>>689070056
>>689070967
What is this even about? Can have some backstory, please?

>>689063194
"Nah"

Please vacuum boys rooms

>>689064499
Cuck

>>689063194
"Also, can you buy two hand wash and bacon?"

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"Did you send the child support check yet?"

Feeling ridiculous for getting upset. sorry

>>689065121
>It's everyone else's fault that I'm different than most people. They should all change ti accommodate my autism.

>>689072407
Shit mate, I am sorry for you. What happened?

"But yeah they tend to not live long, they get mauled by a wild hog or smthn and then grandpa shoots them. This one lasted surprisingly long"

"my tolerance is too high"
We were in the middle of a conversation about edibles

"Lets not do this via text"
-ex-girlfriend that dumped me yesterday after a relation of 5 years

>>689063194
"lol maybe, but thanks bae."

"Fight him"

Comin

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"But I have to ask my parents first when they get back"

-my gf

>>689072601
Farewell and good riddance?

>>689063194
No I swear its not Marquise's Child

I love you too

"show me your ass"

>>689063194
"Do you have a bedtime? Hah, I am getting out of work a bit late so dinner is later hence I might not be able to meet up till later."

Tinder date

>>689063194
// ubsName = (TextView) ubsMapsActivity.findViewById(R.id.textViewUbsName);
// ubsName.setText("test name");
// assertEquals("test name", ubsName.getText());
//
// ubsName = getIntent().getStringExtra("nomeUBS");
// TextView editName = (TextView) ubsMapsActivity.findViewById(R.id.textViewUbsName);
// editName.setText(ubsName);

FML

"I'll be in bed when you get back" - mom

"I don't need to, if you want to keep Svensson for yourself"

"Nice"

>>689063194
got a new phone almost a month ago.. still not a single femanon txt msg X_X

i never got one

>>688888888
anyone remember what it said?

"You coming? You're gonna miss the bouncy house!"

A REAL fucking douche.

>>689070967
shitbag.

>>689073031
Someone has a fun life.

>>689073268
This
Vvvv

>to the tune of the safelite commercials
Toss me a salad captain O'Brain
O toss me a wave
A boatof stoat Mr. Captain
Captain o'brain

meet me at the pool in 10-15 bfore it closes.

"Hey call me when you get s chance please"

>>689064499
triggered at those last four of my social

>>689063194
let me check

>>689073334
fuck you thundercunt, you dont know my life. im not here to get judged by assholes like you, im here to contribute.

>>689072844
nah mate. I asked her why she told me she loves me barely a week ago and now decides to "take a pause". I've been in a wonderful relation for 5 years and still bitches can't be honest about their feelings.

"I'm sorry if I offended you before. I'll be more tactful with what I say. There are other ways to tell people something they did bothered you than having to say "cunty" and I'd like to think you're more mature than that."

" I'll suck ur dick for money :( "

>>689073599
checked

"I'm going to kill myself"

>>689073729
Maybe the bitch found someone else. I am sorry man, I wish you good luck with your further life.

>>689072473
I guess so, but I miss actually hanging out with real people

now it's just internet drama

I've been talking to people from all around the world on the internet since 2002, it's not socializing, it's not the fucking same as talking to someone in person. These people don't get it. They think facebook is socializing, IT'S FUCKING NOT. How else to talk to them then? Go over to their house? That's considered creepy to go over to someone's house uninvited unlike back in the 90s or early 00s when my friends would just come over and then we'd go play. Instead now people make public event announcements on facebook just to get people to hang out with them.

How is it that the internet geeks of 00s are now more social than the normalfags and the normalfags are now the internet geeks?

Times sure have changed.

Ok Thanks

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>>689072811
FYI, here's a pic of my gf doing a Ryuk cosplay (she is half japanese half white)

Me: what do you miss?
Her: everything
Her: how is it awkward haha?
Me: because you're married atm...

>>689074097
Backstory?

>>689070967
you're a shitbag grow a pair and be there for your children fuckhead

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>>689063194
>What's the last text message you received from a person of the opposite sex say?

Hmmm. I can't figure it out.

>>689063194
>>689063194
>>689063194
>Happy birthday

Trips decides what I request as a gift. She's my ex.

>>689063194
I think it was back in 2012 when my ex texted me that she was coming over with a friend to pick up her stuff from the apartment. I don't recall texting any other woman since.

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>>689070967
That grill literally let you have an orgasm and excrete semen inside of her vagina, and you cheat on her? Fuck off asshole, you got to do something that tons of ppl on here dream of doing. Especially me and others with impregnation fetishes.

>>689075005
Nah, changed my mind. Make it dubs.

>>689075383
Just make it simple. A good ol' BJ

<3<3<3<3

My Tarzan

No???? Why would i

>>689075005
Nostalgia sex.

>>689075649
Backstory?

It was, and I'm sorry if I was insensitive. I didn't really, and still don't know what to say. But please know that you do have people that care about you, and you have at least one friend.

I miss you :(

>>689075479
Almost. She did give good head, swallowed too.

"goodnight"

>>689063194
>her: what are you up to?
>me: playing project Zomboid, an excellent zombie survival simulation game. Dead Hard but Dead Good
>her: sounds fun. Looking forward to seeing you tonight x

>>689075757
I'm tempted to count that. I'll come back to it if no true dubs come.

'I can't im going out with my mum'

>>689075210
fuck off thundercunt. its my life.

"I had to get the longer one"

I got those Satan's Nipples for u muh nig

>>689063194
"HAHAHA THAT WOULD BE SO INTERESTING AHA oh secretly i actually do you know that anon"

"wher dat half pound beef n cheese?"

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>>689063194
"wanna do strikes?"

context: we play Destiny together.

Every time I think you can't get any more perfect and you do

>>689077298
How fat is she?

You worry too much! Nothing has changed! :)

"You're moving out tomorrow. Period."

Awww, I'm sorry, honey

Stop messaging me

>>689076003
>>689075757
Welp I don't see any dubs for ya..

"Have a goodnight :D"

>>689077696
Backstory?

"Bad news babe I'll be here another hour......good news I'm gonna fuck your brains out when I walk through the door"

>>689077407
Fuck if I know, I don't go around asking people their weight.

Probably lighter than I think, since she's only 160cm tall.

>>689063194
"Made me think of you"

>>689077756
yeah... no

"It's definitely yours anon"

>>689063194
"Hey"
crazy ex who left the state to become a stripper after we broke up

>>689075005
>>689075005
>>689075005
>>689075005
No takers? Otherwise this guy >>689075757 gets it.

"You remind me of helen keller"

"oh ok :)"

"Mommy loves you sweetie <3"
That's my gf btw

>>689078295
>"It's definitely yours anon"
Been there, sucks man. Hope it's definately not yours

"I feel u"

>>689078658
you can clearly see the picture fatass

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>>689078904
>tfw your mom is your girlfriend

>>689063194
hahaha it's okay

"gay"

"We'll be home in 5 minutes" - Dad

"k"

"you know what, you're right. You're getting too fat anyway."

I dumped my girlfriend lol, I bulked too hard and was kinda chunky. I thought of the perfect comeback of "I can lose weight but you can't unfuck 20+ dudes." kek

"The cops were at my tball game today"

" FUCK OFFFFF
5 more minutes "
Reminding my gf/ex/longstory not sleep in, haha

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>>689076143
what is a thundercunt homie?

Your dick is HUGE. If you want to fuck someone, hire a prostitute

I've been cheating on you for that last 6 months.

>>689063194
Idk if shes even there

>>689079688
Good thing this ain't ylyl, cats would've got me.

>>689077714
Alright brother, looks like you got it. I'll probably have to talk her into it because she's on this high and mighty religion thing now. Corrupting her again might bring about some worthwhile lulz though.

"My moms an alcoholic so like idk :'D i just can't do it all the time"

>>689079688
fuck you

"I'm so sorry, but everything will be okay and you just need to keep a positive mind :)"

I wish you could be too daddy :(

I want to fuck you all night

"I'm feeling a bit lonely tonight...hit me up it's been awhile"
my ex, I did not hit her up

>>689081155
Bull

>I will!
Nothing much.

>>689073824
nice a sad girl

'Thanks for using me' and some other loopy ass bullshit.

>>689081085
One other random one from her. Seems to be slightly hinting to something


"Yeah thats my everyday lol. Psych gets out at 10:30 and public speaking at 3:30 with nothing inbetween hahah"

>>689063194

We should listen to it together, chilling on the couch or something. (In reference to The Wall)

If anyone here is bored this person ripped me off on kijiji feel free to spam him +16132614962

>>689081562
True story

Keep in touch over break, maybe you can come down to connecticut

Ur towels are in the dryer FYI I just havnt had a chance to take them out yet. We might be spending the night at Thomas parents tonight

>>689082081
>Psych
Yeah or she's playing with your head for fun. Psychology students do that shit to stroke their egos.

En tiiä paskaa

>>689082512
Yeah and Jesus made water into everclear.

shit sorry, am at home now

>>689082581
It's just a Psych 101 or Child Psych course. her actual major is Nursing (Same as me)

>>689063194
"Hello what the fuck???"

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>>689082823

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>>689082823
Im sorry youre a virgin

'Saw a banana pepper chameleon today. Thought of you'