all over myself then lie in my own mess for a couple mins feeling disgusted with myself

>>686446413
I put a napkin on my desk and cum on it.

Used to blow my load directly into a tissue with no mess but it feels better to just shoot and let it go where it goes/

On ur mum

File: 1411662521029.gif (983 KB, 285x285) Image search: [Google]

983 KB, 285x285

>>686446413
I jerk off in my hand, then wash it down the sick.... what are you, retarded?

>>686446709
*sink

>>686446666
With those quads, I'd be honored if you came on me mum.

>>686446709
My hand isn't enought to contain my monster loads

>>686446502
kinda this

i always cum INSIDE my boxers/underwear
why? i got caught jerking off furiously by my grandma and aunt and ever since then i get super paranoid when im masturbating so i figured what the hell i'll just rub my dick without flaunting it out until i cum
got so used to it, never changed my way of jerking off since then

any used white t-shirt i have laying around. Throw it in the laundry afterwards, good as new.

File: ewwww.gif (686 KB, 160x160) Image search: [Google]

686 KB, 160x160

>>686446762

File: eOHse.jpg (98 KB, 480x480) Image search: [Google]

98 KB, 480x480

>>686447106
How small is your dick that would never work for me.

just open up the window, :D

>>686446413
in you are mums vagina

>>686447498
7 inch
im asian

just kind of wherever? idk

Cum into my hand and throw it against the wall.

Into a pitcher.

>>686447637
I'm 7 inches It's uncomfortable to have a boner wearing pants no way I'd be able to jerk off. Try again

>>686447637
>7 inch
>asian

Yeah right.

Into toilet. No cleanup. Sit reverse. Phone on top of tolilet.

Put dick in sock

>>686448336
Cut fag detected.

I've just been eating my jizz since I was 12

I'n the sheets

>>686447106
Same, they get washed anyway and nones the wiser

on my belly/face. having to turn to the side to cum in something makes it less enjoyable

>>686446413
I insert my schwanz into the OP's fantasy girlfriend's anus.

hello OP

I ejaculat powrefuly
the OP's fantasy girlfriend explodes from the force and volume of my seamin
A tear roll's down the OP's cheek
I defecate

Ahhh it is good to be the king! The schwanz king!

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0hO0dgzFRnj

File: 1463588973127.jpg (132 KB, 580x576) Image search: [Google]

132 KB, 580x576

>>686446413
it goes where it pleases

>1.5m TP
>hold it between chin and chest
>jizz on TP-tie
>squeeze out last few drops
>roll it up BUTDONOTSPILLIT
>discard said roll
>wash hands

>>686449319
Also; bathroom

>>686446709
oh that sink next to the bed?

I make a pocket pussy using two sponges, a latex glove, and a sock, so when I'm done fapping I just chuck the glove into the bin.

Either a latex glove, a bottle or another container which then gets dumped. Or I catch it in my hands and go to the bathroom to wash up.

Into my flesh light. Which i then wash with soap and water

Most times I just lay out my boxers on the floor and blow freely on them

>>686446413
I usually cum in my dirty underwear....

File: 1464318994017.jpg (36 KB, 750x550) Image search: [Google]

36 KB, 750x550

Mostly into the toilet, sometimes shower.

Occasionally if nobody is around. I like to jerk off in random places around the house for added excitement.

>>686450000
uh. checked, your name is now "beginning chan"

>>686448456
Why is this just a cutfag thing? Im cut and do it occasionally but i didnt know anteaterfags didnt partake.

>>686450000
Cheeki breeki

>>686450193
The head is too senstive on uncut fags the sock would make it hurt

>>686448109
>Into toilet. No cleanup. Sit reverse. Phone on top of tolilet.
This

>>686450000
Quaaaaads

>>686450193
Because we can jerk off using our foreskins, just the way nature intended. Whereas you get to have a dry dick you can only jack with objects or lube.

Golden Coin technique you stupid faggots. No cum.

> Put TP on underware
> Fap
Cleanest and most safe way to fap imo, atleast this way I can fap in the same room as my parents with relative ease. Though If I'm feeling really horny I'll just do It in the bathtub or naked in my bed.

File: 1462491407948.png (67 KB, 230x230) Image search: [Google]

67 KB, 230x230

>>686449385
Ayyy

File: 1453838139237.jpg (9 KB, 291x343) Image search: [Google]

9 KB, 291x343

>be when i was retard teenager
>fap almost everyday
>have bed next to wall
>so, I lie in bed and there is wall to my left
>would nut and just carelessly flick it to the wall
>this goes on for years
>mom cleaning room one day while I'm on computer (in same room)
>she moved bed to clean under bed
>>eww anon what is that on wall??
>wall caked with about 3-4 years of my dick snot
>streaks with sub-streaks running down from it and all
>"uhh, uhh... I spilled uhh... Cola once and uhh"
>>Tsk anon... I told you not to drink up stairs!


I think she knows

File: 1463442523465.jpg (50 KB, 500x375) Image search: [Google]

50 KB, 500x375

>>686451187
>"son we need to talk"

File: 753.png (74 KB, 284x200) Image search: [Google]

74 KB, 284x200

>>686449688
>when you don't wash it but wanna fuck it
>the smell. The fucking smell

i have a t shirt laying in my room i jerk into

change it for a new one every week or so sometimes longer

I cum on my belly, lay there for about 5 minutes then wipe on the top of my bedsheets. I then fall asleep and wake up.

I change my sheets weekly though, and they're always white, so the stains are nearly invisible.

I have two small ferns on my room.

I cum into the soil of one and then water.

The other one gets just water.

My semen seems to have made it stronger than its brother.

Into the toilet. I put toilet paper in the water and then sit on the toilet backwards. I cum on the tp in the water then flush.
Reason for the tp is sometimes the cum sticks to the sides of the toilet and doesn't flush. Then the next person to use it sees jizz floating around.

Into a bottle. I let it stay a while and then drop it into the ventilation system of a nearby grocery store.

File: image.jpg (390 KB, 1328x2124) Image search: [Google]

390 KB, 1328x2124

This is me

>>686446413
In my cat's mouth. He loves it...the faggot.

>>686447106
My mom and sisters would catch me i only had a tee shirt on when i was growing up. My bedroom had no lock

On my hand then in my mouth you fucking homos

I have my own place and I used to throw small get togethers.

I don't like Coke, because Pepsi is superior, but I buy both. When I cum I wipe it onto the tops of the cans of Coke, and make sure it's spread evenly.

When dumb girls come over I offer them drinks of Pepsi or coke. If they ask for coke then the dumb cunts will taste my sperm.

Serves them right for choosing the inferior choice.

Haven't had anyone over in a while so the tops of the cans are getting really sticky.

>>686453187
They probably saw the huge cum stains in your shirts when they did the laundry.

It has changed a lot.

>be uncutfag
>cum in foreskin
>pinch it in
>waddle to the toilet
>release intobowl

Then got cut

>cum into hand
>clean up

then got wierd

>cum onto hand
>lick it off
>everytime
>hate the taste
>do it anyway for punishment

>>686453793
Yea most shirts were white fruit of the loom shirts

>>686447498
>7 inches
>asian
Pick one.

Shower ALWAYS
I fuckin love it

>>686450000
A brave one.

>>686446666
>>686446633
>>686447611
>>686448011
>>686449688
>>686450000
>>686450777
>>686451444
>>686453355
>>686454155
Noice.

I trained my PC muscle and now i just don't cum. I orgasm completely dry.

>>686456088

you people are the worst

>>686448617
mee too

>>686456088
do you contract when you're cumming ? can you have multiple ?

>>686450508
Im uncut and masturbate with a sock.

>>686446413
I've got a cum towel. It's crusty as shit, but it's effective.

>>686456088
I'm trying to train mine, I can delay a cumshot by about 5 seconds now, how do you train yours?

>>686446413
i cum all over everything in my house

>>686457315
You can prevent an orgasm without any practice it just takes will power. It serves no purpose and is retarded though

On your pant

>>686448109
Never though of that.

Not bad.

>>686450000
Checked

>>686456782
I contract but can't cum more often than usual.

>>686457315
There is no real training technique. Find the muscle and use it when ever you can.

>>686448011
Ive met an asian with a 7inch
Its not impossible just rare.
All the pleasure of big dick + smart asian + weird asian fetishes.
I DO TAXES YOU TENTACLE IN PUSSY

>>686450777
whats that?

>>686457641
Not the anon you replied to, but if you put a few sheets of tp in before it catches the cum. If you don't do that sometimes it won't flush and everyone can see floating cum stuck on the side of the bowl.

>>686446413
i cum in my boxers and just fall sleep, it will dry by the morning

>>686451444
Change ur diet u slob

>>686451187
Hahaha what did it look like after sitting there for that long ? FUCKING LOST IT HARD.

>>686459158
You: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXLanoiH9EQ

Myself, I cum inside my wife, but before that, I always came on toilet paper, that I got beforehand, or some paper that I threw on the garbage can afterwards.

File: c3ea83dd134aedc6c18ef5e9878709b7.jpg (169 KB, 1531x1531) Image search: [Google]

169 KB, 1531x1531

Oh fun fun I have story to contribute

>be me
>literally all years between elementary and high school
>jack off laying in bed
>lean over
>blast all over the floor beside my bed
>get up
>have a good ol after-fap piss
>in the corner of my room
>blame it on the cats and dogs
>repeat until my mom lost custody somewhere during high school
>mfw to this day she's still living in that house and there's still piss all over the walls and floor and a hard black island of cum next to my old bed

>>686446413
Wait you guys don't use your old underwear from the day before?

>>686446413
Wait you guys don't use your old underwear from the day before? You know like using the leg hole to jerk off with and into?

I used to just pull my boxers up over my dongus as I'm about to fire off, then just sit there and brew in it. I decided that was fuckin' gross, so now I've got a towel right next to the bed that gets washed once it starts to feel starchy.

I close the foreskin when I cum... So I guess I cum in my own dick?
Hmm...

File: gb.jpg (161 KB, 884x712) Image search: [Google]

161 KB, 884x712

I just blow my load inside this jumbo care bear

>>686446709
ma nigga

>>686460382
And I thought I was disgusting.

When i need to poop i jerk it off first into toilet bowl and than poop.
Or, when im taking a shower i watch porn and jerk it off.
Or if i am alone in the house porn on my PC and jerk it in the tissue. and than discard it.

>2016
>using napkins and tissues
>not just wiping your dick on the nearest object and worrying bout it later

File: 1458232394669.jpg (59 KB, 919x720) Image search: [Google]

59 KB, 919x720

https://youtu.be/VLnWf1sQkjY

Just in my pants, then go to toilet and wipe them and take a shower

>>686460868
That things probably got mold growing in it now from the old cum kek

>>686461399
I do similar. I usually fap to pass the time while shitting. Sometimes I forget to shit then I leave the bathroom and still have to hold in a brown snake because I'm retarded.

>>686447808
spiderman, spiderman
does whatever a spider can

cums in hand
when he jerks off
slams it hard against the wall
look out! here comes the spider man!

>>686446413
I just cum in a towel and wash it along with my dirty clothes.

File: image.jpg (238 KB, 682x600) Image search: [Google]

238 KB, 682x600

>>686462868
Kek

in my mouth

>>686448109
10/10 way, same here anon

>>686462868
My sides!

File: Newfag_newfag_oh_god_what_do_i_do_05de76_5605683.jpg (22 KB, 478x265) Image search: [Google]

22 KB, 478x265

>>686463914
Great, just great. summerfag season has started

>>686462868
picture with hand splatting cum and timestamp

>>686463373
i swear i don't know what possessed me, david.

maybe i imagined that guy shooting cum ropes from his hand instead spidey webs.

>>686448775
yeah, no one sure is suspicious of your always crusty underwear

>>686464380
hey, i'm just the singer. i don't cum in my hand.

i just use an old-fashioned fap-rag/wash cloth -- which proceed to use in the shower the following day. so yeah, if there's a wash cloth in the laundry, i did the naughty (very rarely these days)

>>686464377
sorry to say but your post embodies new/summer-faggotry.

pls don't do it anymore, it really adds nothing to the thread.

>>686456570
You been eating his jizz since he was twelve? Pedo fag!

>>686465844
Top Kel. Nice one anon ; )

>>686453150
What the hell man

>>686459368
Dead cum + penis enfused latex/rubber/whatever pocket pussy are made of will always smell disqusting. I could go on a tropical fruit only diet and that shit would still smell

>>686454372

kek

File: gtmasou.jpg (31 KB, 500x349) Image search: [Google]

31 KB, 500x349

>>686452435
Pic or didn't happen.

File: 1407352672972.jpg (20 KB, 600x454) Image search: [Google]

20 KB, 600x454

>>686459703
Well... Like dried, flicked-at-wall, wads of dried cumstains

File: triggered_by_mrlorgin-d9aahmc.png (116 KB, 320x371) Image search: [Google]

116 KB, 320x371

>>686465565
Found the summerfag

Pulling my shirt up, cum on my belly and clean it up afterwards.

>>686465565
So summer.

had a friend that would cum on his chest and rub it all over his body like lotion. i'm more dignified and use a sock

File: Anon bed.jpg (2 MB, 2592x1944) Image search: [Google]

2 MB, 2592x1944

>>686451187
Jesus, it must have been an awful sight. Pic related.

I usually have to wait until I'm in bed, so I just cum all over myself. I like the smell, the warm feeling before it quickly gets cold, the taste...but then again I'm a fucking degenerate posting about masturbation on /b/ so saying that I'd redundant

>>686446413
I cum into a fucking napkin, how hard is that.

>>686466599
the summer is magic! oh yeah!

>>686466721
News Flash ,''MAN DIES FROM BEING SKEWERED BY FALLING CUM POPSICLE IN CUM CAVE''

>>686467261
killed by his crusty lifestyle. tragic.

>>686446413
I cum in my mouth

>>686446413
I just cum in my blue comforter. Its not visible within a few minutes but if the police ever shined a black light on it I would be fucked

File: get.gif (437 KB, 400x400) Image search: [Google]

437 KB, 400x400

>>686446666
Checked, witnessed

File: C__Data_Users_DefApps_AppData_INTERNETEXPLORER_Temp_Saved Images_1463610462056.gif (997 KB, 269x201) Image search: [Google]

997 KB, 269x201

>>686461586
>2016
>not having a designated jizzrag
Pleb

>>686468486
Why would you be arrested for cumming on ur blanket?

>>686469498
Not that anon, but blacklight shows DNA.

Cum = DNA