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Waifu claiming thread >minimal e/rp >no empty claims >always
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 165
Thread images: 127
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Waifu claiming thread

>minimal e/rp
>no empty claims
>always drink enough liquor
>>
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>>685370075
>always drink enough liquor
how much is enough?
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>>685370075
kagami claimed
>>
>no empty claims
Obligatory claim.
>>
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Britfag Maki Claimed
>I want to do explosive things to megumin
>>
Maximum lurk engaged.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eco4z98nIQY
>>
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>>685369066
>I practically had to write her application essays.
That... doesn't sound great. But if she really wants to be a doc, so be it.

I want to be a neurologist. I've seen patients with Alzheimer's, Parkinson's and similar conditions lose control of their bodies and forget friends and relatives. I want to stop that.
I have a lot of work to do though, including getting my lazy ass to move and study instead of shitpost on a Taiwanese basket-weaving imageboard.

>>685369157
Te aconsejaría incluir entre tus planes este fin de semana un poco de ejercicio
>No era evidente que diría esto, ¿cierto? :^)

>Te agradecería ignorar la tentación del 3DPD, no te lo recomiendo en absoluto, pero posiblemente tú ya tengas mejor razonamiento sobre eso que yó.
Para que te hagas una idea, es una 3DPD de 184 cm. No creo que pueda funcionar conmigo kek
>>
Claiming Yuuki
>>
Jenny claim
>>
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Still a fun day despite stupid arguments
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Kek, so much angst and edge in these threads.
>>
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>scanning files
>I last played LoL on Wednesday
>y u do dis

Rory claimed
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>>685370218
>>
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>>685369608
Kek, well in that case it'll just be whenever I guess.

>Best idol claimed
>>
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Kyouko claimed.

>>685369157
>Again, glad to see you.

Same for you.
>>
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QOTT: If you could make one animal of your choice domestic what would you choose?
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Miho claimed
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>>685370296
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>>685370160
These pics always weird me out :o
>>685370177
Just enough to not throw up~
>>685370225
Like heavy drinking~?
>>
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>>685370242
Bestbro.
>>685370296
Fluffy Hair.
>>685370371
>>
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>>685370472
komodo dragon!!!
>>
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>>685370472
Wolf
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I'm leaving for now.
>all I know is it will be for longer than just a few hours
Goodbye.
>>
Time to play league.
I bet you can't guess my favorite champion.
>Hint, snow.
>>
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>>685370296
Wet boots are fun?
>>
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Akiko claimed

>>685368125
>>685368930
Galko, Hand, Yuuko
I really hope you guys don't leave, it's fun having you around
>tfw emotional detachment issues so I would probably be unable give an actual fuck if you did but still, don't
I don't know what it was like when the threads weren't 24/7 but there's just no way to cut it when the demand for them is as high as it is now. Feels kind of bad having been part of the problem, and people don't seem to like me all that much. Sorry for that
>>
>>685370472
Red fox i just find them adorable
>>
>>685370599
look up saarloos wolfhounds, those are pretty close
>>
>>685370472
Wedge tailed eagle.
>>685370655
Gee, theres a few of those.
>Sej?
>>
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>>685370665
go to bed
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>>685370472
Alligator.
>Nom nom nom
>>
Dibs on Kirusu
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>>685370637
>>
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>>685370414
I guess so~
You're fucking cool bro I like you

>>685370560
why not

>>685370655
anivia
>>
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>>685370296
Humans are stupid, we're bound to have stupid arguments and enjoy them.

>>685370583
That's one exotic choice, falling asleep hugged to one must be cool. Too bad they are cold blooded, they look fun to hug.
>>
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>>685370766
Nope.
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I'd make it Homu~
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>>685370637
See you later, Galko. Stay safe.

>>685370342
Heyo, Rory. How goes it?

>>685370304
Juri, what's up?
>>
>>685370472
Otters, though I'm sure they can already be domesticated.
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>>685370658
Well you don't know if you haven't tried.
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>>685370871
Having my 6th glass right now
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>>685370871
I need to hit update more.
>Negative
>>
>>685370304
Hello juri, are you doing well?

>>685370242
Oh cool, we will most likely have a cure for Alzheimer's in a handful of decades. Hope you can speed it along.

>>685370534
British

>>685370579
Moonpie

>>685370637
Farewell

>>685370658
They are not

>>685370665
I've been waiting a long time for someone new to chime in. Why are such conversations almost always ignored?
Anyways don't worry bby. You're great no matter what.

>>685370915
It is also fun to watch
>>
>>685370766
>Wedge tailed eagle.
mah nigga
>>685370926
o shit waddup?
>>
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>>685370637
See you Galko.
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>>685370737
Noice
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>>685370915
awwww....you're right, but if it's a hot night it could cool me down!!!
>is it bad that i think they look like puppies?
>>
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>>685370996
>had 4 cans and 2 bottles

>>685371006
ashe
>>
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>No empty claims
Don't tell me what to do.
>>
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>>685370926
You're wasting your only chance on something that is already very domestic.

>>685371086
Whelp... I think they are cuter than any puppy. I guess weird means cute for me.
>>
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>>685370579
Hi bestbro, how you doing?

>>685370637
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_E2EHVxNAE

>>685371043
I will, ain't nobody gonna steal my Nobel prize, that shit is mad cash
>>
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>>685370637
Goodbye for now.
>>685370942
Hand.
>>
>>685370925
Ill just list them then
Ashe, Liss, Anivia, Tryn, Olaf, Sej
>>685370942
It goes well. Waiting for 'patches' on LoL.
>>685370956
Ferrets are basically land otters.
>>685371047
You know it mang. Beautiful birds.
>>
>>685370075
I claim all the waifus with my schwanz, for I am the schwanz king! Hahaha!

>I defecate regally and proudly display my majestic, erect schwanz
>I fill all the waifus with seamin in their vagoos
>The butt, and the anus, are pleasurably filled next, like the eclaire
>I ograsm powrefully in each waifu
>I have those bitches make me a sandwich so I can defecate more
>I defecate more, the world is my wasteland
>>
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YALLA HEZZE
>>
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>>685371148
Nope.
>Hint, they arn't from the north.
>>685371258
Cheater...
>But all incorrect.
>>
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>>685371182
I just copy and pasted the other thread rules
Sorry D:
>>685371148
Noice~
>7th glass
>>685371275
k
>>
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>>685371246
Good enough. How are you?
>>
>>685371323
I insert my schwanz into the OP's fantasy girlfriend's anus.

hello OP

I ejaculat powrefuly
the OP's fantasy girlfriend explodes from the force and volume of my seamin
A tear roll's down the OP's cheek
I defecate

Ahhh it is good to be the king! The schwanz king!

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0hO0dgzFRnj
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>>685370964
I should really try it some time.
>I have and it's terrible
>How are you doing?

>>685371043
Oh yeah? Go on...

>>685371248
Milk.

>>685371258
Damn, hope they download quickly, buddy. Up to anything else, eat yet?
>>
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>>685370242
Antes muerto que hacer ejercicio.
Literalmente.

>Para que te hagas una idea, es una 3DPD de 184 cm.
Do not want.

150 - 160 cm or go home.

>>685370296
>stupid
No u.

>>685370637
Best of wishes, Galko.
Good luck.

>>685370218
Hols.
>>
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URF IS LIVE
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>>685370871
Likewise man, plus you have an excellent waifu.
>>
>>685370177
Just enough so you won't have to be reminded of the eternal pain of anime girls not being real
>>
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>>685371231
lol, they are pretty cute huh??? they walk funny too
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kxmfJMj5To
>>
>>685371487
I'm queing now!
>Will yell "MIZORE" in all chat every match.
>>
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>>685371258
for real
>parents worked as wildlife rescue
>had to save wedge tail once
>acted chill as fuck when being held in the back of truck
>never forgot about chill eagle
>>
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>>685371351
are we talking a skin or is their classic based on snow?

>>685371366
damn you're faster than me megu
>although this lager is disgusting la

>>685371510
your taste is top tier
>>
>>685371351
Winter Wonderland Lulu. Or Snow Day Malz.
>>
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>>685371453
I did too, for 2 days in row.
Debating on whether to go to bed or play the FO4 DLC.
>>
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Murano... I just love her so much.
>>
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>>685370942
Greetings. Nothing much, I've been lurking these threads all day while at work, and I guess I feel like posting now. I take it you've been well?
>>685371043
Hello cinnabun Yuuko, as said above I'm finishing the last hour of my shift and decided to post. Did you have a good day today? Perhaps something eventful?
>>
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>>685371275
Good try but nope
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>>685371231
Don't care.
You're all mine.
<3
>>
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>>685371453
Yes, I have had breakfast.
>WHY DID SOMEONE ON OUR TEAM GO TEEMO
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
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>>685370599
>>685370737
There's a program ongoing that tries to breed a dog resembling the dire wolf
I believe they were called american alsatians

>>685370794
That was tried and failed, I'm drinking some mead now to try and get sleepy
>inb4 staring at pc screen keeps you awake
I have blue light philter and pass out regularly behind my pc

>>685371043
Well I'm just me. I don't try to fuck up these threads. I'm not hostile to anyone and try to get involved and involve others. After all that's what we do. I don't know about hard rules and how it used to be.
>Why are such conversations almost always ignored?
Because it's easier to ignore than to acknowledge a problem
>You're great no matter what.
Thanks Yuuko, that somehow felt less empty than most compliments flinged around here
>>
>>685371047
Not much Jenny, missed ya.

>Tsuyu
>>
>>685371366
Your submissive acceptance pleases the schwanz king
>>
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>>685371453
They go on your feet, hand.

>>685371486
<

>>685371664
We know each other well enough at this point to know that doesn't happen unfortunately.
I'd ask back, but i fear i already know the answer
>hope you're doing great
>>
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its mine
>>
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>>685371258
That's true. I'd love to have a pet ferret

>>685371487
I would be playing URF but I've completely burned myself out on LoL for a while
>>
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>>685371622
Checkd
>Skin is correct.
>Get bamboozled.

I can't give any other hints, but the champ is male.
>>
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>>685371532
Thats how a real badass walks, I should learn from it.

>>685371751
I wan't to be yours but not all yours. And welcome back, I guess.
>>
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>>685370560
sounds like a bit too much to me
>>
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>>685371453
Is there anything I can do to help?
>>685371486
Ruri.
>>
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>>685371943
CRYOCORE BRAND
>>
>>685371487
Play ap reksai, ruin the obligatory shaco's day

>Akiko
>>
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hey whats a good memay
>>
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>>685371622
Imma stop drinking for now tho, gonna drink again in an hour or two
>I quite like lagers
>>685372062
I don't fill the glass, just the bottom of it
>It's like a shot
>>
>>685371701
>I insert my schwanz into the butt, and the anus
>I have a powreful ograsm
>it fills you with seamin

Ooooohhh yeeeeeaaahhh! (the voice of the cookie monster having a powreful ograsm)

>my twitching schwanz shakes you around like a ragdoll
>the final blast of seamin launches you into spehss
>>
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>>685370075
Trust me, I'm a waifu.
>>
>>685372184
millhouse
>>
>>685372018
Uh.. Yeah.
I'm actually just gonna leave.

>Tsuyu
>>
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>>685372259
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little witch? I'll have you know I was an average student at Mitakihara Middle School, and I've been involved in numerous secret contracts with Kyuubey, and I have over 300 nearly successful Walpurgisnacht kills. I am trained in grief seed haunting and I'm the top magical girl in the entire PMMM cast. You are nothing to me but just another soul to save. I will erase all witches from the past and the future with compassion the likes of which has never been seen before in this universe, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me in your labyrinth? Think again, familiar. As we speak I am unable to contact my family and I'm here to take away all your suffering so you better prepare for the storm, meguca. The storm that saves you from the cycle of hope and despair. You're fucking redeemed, kid. I am everywhere, for all time, and I can save you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my own hands. Not only am I extensively trained in purifying soul gems, but I have access to the entire arsenal of Homura-chan's shield thingy and I don't even need it to wipe your miserable ass of the face of reality, you little zombie. If you could have known what holy redemption your little "clever" wish was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have never become a fucking magical girl. But you couldn't, you did, and now I'm paying the price, you goddess-damned baka. I will take away all your pain and your wish won't end in tragedy. You're fucking coming with me to the yuri afterlife, kiddo.
>>
>>685372018
hahahaha!! he's got that strut!!!
>>
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>>685371901
True, but that doesn't mean I won't ask occasionally to see if that answer might've changed.
>It's always nice to see you.
>>
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>>685371806
>flinged
flung*
:^)
>>
>>685372383
>kagami
>>
>>685372367
Bad timing, I hope you enjoy your weekend!
>H
>>
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>>685371640
2 days in a row? Jesus Christ, man. Hope your feet were alright after that.

You should sleep and play the DLC later, this is Bethesda we're talking about here.

>>685371664
Better than something bad happening, eh? Glad you're posting, cute stuff. Always nice to see you, especially with the mentality I'm in right now, kek.

I've been well, yeah. Results from the doctor have made me pretty happy, thank you for asking.

Hope work went well, buddy.

>>685371754
Nice, glad you ate something, adorable. What did ya eat?

>>685371901
Sooo...they're like feet gloves?

>>685372074
Nah, it's already over, man. Wasn't going anywhere anyway.

How's your day going?

>>685372276
I trust you.
>>
>>685372518
Not bad timing.
I'm leaving becuase of what you said, I'm just gonna go do something else.
>>
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well LoL was a disaster lol

>>685372184
I've honestly just been trying to ruin this community for the past few months through different personas and methods.

I genuinely hate it and most of you.
>>
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>>685371392
Bored and kinda tired. Tired of doing nothing somehow.

>>685371486
>Antes muerto que hacer ejercicio.
>Literalmente.
Te mataré entonces. No serías el primero... [risa malvada]

>150-160cm or go home
Estoy de acuerdo, pero mira, tendré que ir a verla por obligación.
>>
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>>685372644
STOP
>>
>>685372383
I'll come peacefully if the incubators are forced to watch. Otherwise no dice.
>>
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnZdlhUDEJo

>>685372558
Double socks do wonders, even during winter.
Probably, but it's been pretty promising as far as I've gotten, last time the game crashed really hard though.
>>
>>685371860
missed ya too tsuyu! <3
>>685372644
dubs don't lie
>>
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>>685372644
Oh no not this shit again :^)
>>
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>>685370472
Ȟ̳͎̥͎̬̜͍̈́͑ͯͮŨ̱̆ͦ̾ͭͩ̐͢M̦͉̑͆̄̕A͔͚̯̘̒͊ͨ͊͟N̛͖̮̫̞̤͗ͪ̾̀̀͂S̘̼̟͕̅̈́̽͌̽ͯ͆͝
>>
>>685372716
Come here, pretty. I have some lemon lube.
>>
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>>685372755
nice dubs
>>685372783
>>685372739
It's a good meme :o
>>
>>685372442
Tanks
>tfw english isn't my native language

>>685372644
Who did you play?

>>685372184
Every thread is another mark. A mark that represents what social skills and self respect you have lost. I've lost count of all your marks, but I can assure (and you probably already know) that you're lost. I don't think you'll ever come back and I think at this point you're only running off steam, insanity, and delusions. I think you're just too prideful to quit posting so much so often, and too cowardly to actually end the life you know you wasted. I mean, Im rooting for your suicide. So get out there and actually do something to end the misery of the monotony that is your life's
:^)
>>
>waiting for next thread
>was late to this one

try guessing who my waifu is

(hand-kun may know if i say, grace neutral, assassins creed 2)
>>
>>685372629
That was not my intention, sorry. I warned that I end up hurting those who like me. I love seeing you here.
>>
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>>685372062
>>685372231
Oh wait, I thought you responded to one of my other post
>I'm an idiot
You may be right, it's probably too much to drink
How about enough to get dizzy~?
>>
>>685372558
Exactly, except not water proof.

>yuuko
>>
>>685372934
Not that hard.
>>
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>>685372934
>try guessing

But NS gives it away...
>>
>>685372902
exactly as i said. dubs never lie

>6-foot tall shitposter
>>
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>>685372558
Nah I meant like you're probably stressed out or pissed off right now so is there anything I could do to help calm you down? Like find some entertainment, play a vidya with you or something?
>>685372716
>Tired of doing nothing
You really are Emi's husbando.
>>
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>>685372184
keemstar
>>685372982
ok that sounds fine
>>685372834
you ok shizuru? you look a bit dead there
>worried rattles
>>
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>>685372917
I played a custom game with my friend who is new and drunk, I'm pretty new too
>>
>>685373047
shhhhhh....

>>685373101
fuck, i forgot i had that
>>
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>>685373173
Ḏ̝̺̞̥̙̗̍̋͐̑ͨ̽o̧̦ͥ̒ṅ̯̓̒ͤͩ̎ͪ͞'̧t̘͇͋̓̒ͯ ̯̥͖̘͔̼̗̈́͡I͚ͤ̎ͯ̐ͤ ͥ͌̈ͧͯ̌a̭l̎̍̈̎̀͐͏̳̟̲̘̤ẘ̰̱ä̺̤̺̋̅͋̓̈̊y̠̹̗s̲?̙̻̲̥̲̰̚
>>
>>685372958
I'm not hurt.
I just said something stupid and I didn't mean to so I'm running away like a bitch
>>
>>685373264
Hah.
>>
>>685372755
<3

>Tsuyu
>>
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>>685373144
oh shit, i got another set of dubs. I'm fucking blessed
>>
>>685373173
Good

>Megumin
>>
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>>685373173
Keemstar is a REAL nigger :^)

>>685372917
That's a good memay :^)
>>
>>685373313
how u been man...
haven't seen you for a week? two weeks? idk
i don't keep track of time anymore
>>
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>>685373444
i'm gonna dank this image up.
>>
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>>685373153
>You really are Emi's husbando.
Literally the best compliment I've ever heard <3

How are your work outs going bestbro?
>>
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>>685372748
Damn, I've heard stories from vet buddies. Got me worried for a sec there, kek.

Wow, what a shocker. A Fallout game crashing really hard.

Update your drivers?

>>685372934
Namesync is the easy way out.

Simple, you're Mikan.

>>685372985
>pats
You should get some water proof ones, love.

>>685373153
Nah nah, you're fine. Talking to y'all is helping me calm down, already calm anyway, kek. Thanks for the offer though, man. You're a good friend.

You up to much right now? Stellaris?
>>
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>>685373289
no
>>685373444
not as much of a nigger as alex though :^)
>>
>>685373301
That's cute! But i'm used to have that situation the other way around... Don't worry, next time we talk I will not remember a thing about this.
>>
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>>685372558
You seem a bit stressed. Good to hear your results are well. Work is the usual, nothing more or less.
>I'm pleased to see you.
>>
Okay gonna roll for fireball shots now
The chocolate milk is all gone
1-9
Dubs is 10
Trips is 20

>tsuyu
>>
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>general Esdeath from akame ga kill

>gotta love me some dom/sub action ;)
>>
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>>685373817
Be safe, Froggo
>>
>>685373770
That's not cute! I want you all to myself but that is selfish and you had a clearly negative reaction to it.
I can't express how much I care about you Homu, the love I have for you is immeasurable.
>>
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>>685373492
Staying afloat pretty good and all that jazz, just procrastinating on sleep.
Neither do I really, although I've been coming around a lot more often lately.
Maybe I should cease doing that.

>>685373667
Kind of the same deal, boots aren't as bad as wet rubber boots though.
Hah, just ended up being in the loading screen for 15 minutes straight and then it crashed.
>>
>>685373667
you really are a dunce aren't you
>>
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Welp, it's now 02:24 so it's time to get to bed.
Goodnight waifu
>>
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>>685373564
Anything for my bestbro.
They're going good, I'm actually noticing changes in my body like muscle growth and my shoulders getting broader so I'm actually feeling good.
>>685373667
Alright if you're sure.
Nah not right now, I've got ancient aliens on the tv in the background since they're doing another marathon. Fucking love this show, half to laugh at it and half because I've actually learned a lot of shit about history from it since they need to back up their theories with fact.
>>
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>>685373762
Oh.
>>
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>>685372098
NOPE!
>>
>>685374017
time is a bitch, fuck her

got any godly music to bless me with?
>>
>>685374213
Goodnight Brit Maki.

>Kyouko
>>
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>>685374213
Goodnight~
Sleep on your side to not die if you puke!
>>
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>>685373667
>you're Mikan
Like many things that took place during the last month or so, I missed the joke.
>>
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Blarg! Work was super busy today
>>
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>>685374341
rip in puke jimi hendrix....
>>
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Dio-sama...
>>
>>685374433
too soon

>Shiro
>>
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>>
>>685373173
>>685373444
>checked
I might be retarded (or I don't follow internet celebrities and drama) but who is Keemstar?
>>
>>685374433
Too soon

>Megumin
>>
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>>685374224
I love that show.
Now do you agree with me.
Why doesn't someone do the same style of show, but use aliens to try and prove god.
THINK ABOUT IT
>>
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>>685374514
>>
>>685374532
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXr-SctgK-c
>>
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>>685374514
Thread replies: 165
Thread images: 127

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