>>682155296
cup
medical gloves
sponges that you can cut a pattern into
hand towel

Spit in your hand, free sadness included though I'm sure you already have that

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfJwC5SeEwo

da fuq

>>682155296
theres a png of instructoinsf loating around

>>682155296
1. Get a job
2. Buy one on the internet from your home computer.

just buy a god damn tenga egg
are you so fucking poor you can't afford a $5 pussy?

>>682155296
Easy to make sex toy:
Step 1) Find a woman to impregnate
Step 2) Hope baby is a female
Step 3) Wait 9 months for that homemade pussy

1. buy a cucumber
2. shove it in your asshole since you're obviously a faggot with no money to buy a real pocket pussy

>>682156844
Why would he want it to be a girl?
Everyone knows little boys are the stuttiest around young age.

>>682155707
maybe if your into 5 year olds

Adopt a newborn baby girl

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Honestly those things aren't that great even officially made ones. Can't stealth fap (FWOMP FWOMP SQUISH SQUISH) and you need lube otherwise its like rubbing your dick on... Well rubber/silicone. And no spit won't do. Good old left n right works just fine

>>682155296
Use a vacuum. You don't even have to clean up after it just suck up all the cum

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>>682157248

>>682157714
Can confirm
plus it makes yo dick bigger cause it suckin on you non stop

Lube and any drinkable bottle you can fit your dick in. Kinda feel like fucking a bottle noting compares to sticking your dick in a a warm pussy

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Go buy some silicone cauking and a bunch of glycerine usually found in a pharmacy. The glycerine helps it harden and if you want it soft mix with paint thinner, the more the softer. If you know how to sculpt/plaster you can make yours easily. I just buy silicone 00 supersoft and make my own since I went through an embarrassing moment when my local post office cashier knew about Bad Dragon toys. I cannot find the dignity to order sex toys again..... Just make them.

Also, disregard my advice, I'm just a furry giving advice.

>>682157929
If your dick can fit in one I have bad news.

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>>682157248
are you that guy from a Serbian film?

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>>682155296

>>682155296
Make oobleck (corn starch and water) in a glass and refrigerate until hardened. Make sure you get a solid color and a gooey consistency when you mix it up.

what you need:
a cup
2 sponges
a latex glove (unless you have latex allergy)

get sponges wet, but wring them out enough so they dont drip

place latex glove in between sponges

place sponge/glove combo in cup, stretch the opening of the glove over the opening of the cup

poke holes so that air in the cup can get out, so you dont get an inflatible sex toy

lube and enjoy

Stick your dick in your bong. Laugh later when friends take bong hits

>>682158721

when your pounding it and it pops and you snap your dick

>>682158503
whos dick is 3 inch in diameter??

>>682159176
That's pretty correct, I had that situation. BTW it keeps making annoying rubber-sounds

Find a tube and jump in the tub.
Stick tube on the d
Suck water in so the rush of water passing up and down your wang pleases you til you cum.

Also known as the water bj.

Piece of PVC pipe a bicycle inner tube and duct tape. Lots of lube.

>>682155296
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gIDH1FLjTY

>>682157714
how? what does it feel like?

>>682159283
7.5 here bud

>>682159948
damn thats one hell of a chode you got there

>>682159948
>doesn't know difference between diameter and girth
>virginfag detected

>>682160229
kek

>>682159948
gg

>>682155296
just buy one familia it´s worth it or get a hooker, eather way you wont be sorry

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>>682159948
Still not 7.5 in diameter. Retard

>>682160444
>>682160229
trips confirmed, virginfag detected

Sit on your hand, wait for numbness. Then fap. It tricks the mind, especially if you have good imagination

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Pringles can, sponge and condom. Wash out the pringles can first though or the smell of condom combined with Pringles will make you throw up

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>>682157714
fucking this

>>682155296
Buy some nopal catacus aka prickly lear leaves the older and larger the better.

Using tweezers remove all thorns. Then place over an open flame. The uncovered burner on your stove is fine. Flip after a second or two. You want to burn off any unseen thorns especially on the edges.

Take a knife slice off the bottom. Then place the tip of the blade in between the "halves" of the cactus leaf. Make a sloghtly larger than dick sized hole. Since its an aloe vera cactus its self lubricating. Make sure it isn't too hot or the dripping juice will burn your nuts.

>>682161391
jesus christ that sounds fucking risky

>>682161567
amen

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amazon tenga eggs
they are amazing
(me using mine)

>>682159834
11/10 would watch again

>>682162141
what the fuck is this and where can i buy it

>>682162468
it's a condom someone inflated it and like did that

>>682162141
>>682162468
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-YuS_LFQ5s

>>682158721
Literally fifis.

>>682161803
you're beautiful, do you wax or shave? also can we see without the egg?

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1. Towel
2. Rubber glove
4. Hair tie or rubber bands
3. Lube
Steps:
>place rubber glove
>fold towel around rubber glove (not fully tight, leave room of approx your cock size)
>now fold the part of the rubber glove that is hanging out of the roll on top of towel
>place hair tie or rubber bands around to secure
>cum buckets

Pic for reference

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>>682161803
for some reason i dont think these are really for eggs...

wrap banana with duct tape, leave a couple of inches unwrapped. cut off unwrapped end, pound out inside, enjoy banana-scented dick.

>>682162141
>>682162734

fuck no, i just had a look at the tutorial for that thing and that shit aint worth the risk mang.
I aint waiting for the lid to unscrew and falcon punch my mushroom tip.

>>682163348
Can you elaborate please I'm somehow interested into the details

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Buy one of these they are everywhere
1. Cut hole
2. Turn inside out
3. Lube up
4. Profit!!

>>682163540
find banana
cut one end clean off
wrap entire banana in tape
leave cut end un taped
hollow out banana insides
microwave for 10 seconds
fuck the fucking fuck out of it until you smell like a fruit bar

>>682163898
>>682161803
post webm of you using the egg

>>682163940
Why does this sound like it actually could make a good sex toy what the fuck I need to try

>>682163940
that....looks.. sensational

>>682163242
lol you put a egg in it and fuck the egg
nah but they are amazing and worth it
plus cheap
clean and reuse

>>682163898
Mind posting more? You look yummy~ ;)

>>682164012
>>682163898
this kid is clearly under 18, youre a sick fuck

>>682163898
no problem! you're one of the first guys i've seen that i'd love to have sex with :p but im guessing you're from america so R.I.P

>>682155296
like what male should your sextoy look like buddy?

>>682164012
oh sorry i dont have one
these are old pics and i cant with my family being here right now

>>682164201
wait. you fuck it WITH the egg in it? this gets weirder and weirder

>>682164266
not my problem

>>682156844
kek'd, also dubs

>>682163529
I laughed

>>682164374
tell them to do it too

>>682156844
truth

>>682164417
it is 100% your problem

>>682163940
http://www.amazon.com/Toysmith-Colorful-Caterpillar-Puffer-Bundle/dp/B01CPKEWGK/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1462138208&sr=8-5&keywords=sensory+caterpillar

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>>682164235
lol thank you

>>682164266
im 26 actually

>>682164271
well come to america and i can show you first hand how they feel in comparison to the real thing

>>682164416
i was kidding you put lube in it

>>682164677
damn i should come over to america :p i dont suppose you have a KIK or SC or anything?

>>682164677
hnnnng, those painted tonails and shaved legs

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>>682163940
I also have used one of these to amazing effect

>>682164677
You look like you'd be wonderful to spend a night in bed with. How would you like it, slow and gentle or nice and rough?

>>682155296
Kidnapping

>>682163529
dude i was totally thinking the same thing... looks great and all, but im not trying to put a helmet on my balls incase that thing unscrews

>>682155296
grab 2 sponges, put a condom with the tip at the bottom and the opening at the top of the sponges between it, and cover the top of the sponges with the stretchable opening, then put it in a plastic bottle thats cut in half and lube up

>>682164909
>>682163940
YOU PEOPLE OF THE INTERNET ARE GETTING TOO CRAFTY
But please, elaborate and give us the details I'm fucking interested tomorrow I'm buying one I swear

>>682164843
lmao i was guna say!

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>>682164861
mhm
if you guys want to chat more add me on kik cause i may have to go soon
Sissiekity

>>682164865
glad you like

>>682164927
obviously nice and rough then after a long night we can go sweet and gentle

>>682165255
cut a hole on one of the sides, push toy inside out, clean everything, lube up inside and fuck, its like a ribbed pussy toy

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>>682165255
I usually find these toys at Party City or AC More, I usually just walk around and look what would feel good on my dick or in my ass

>>682164865
>>682164677
>>682164861

you guys are such fags.... HES A GUY, HOW DO YOU FIND OTHER MEN ATTRACTIVE!?
WHATS WRONG WITH THE SMOOTH SENSATIONAL BEAUTIFUL FEMALES?

>>682165083
ive been hit right on the tip of my dick with a football and that shit hurt like hell .
My dick still has black scarring from that even though the football wasn't hit hard.
Can't imagine what would happen getting a direct hit from that especially while I'm going to town on it.

>>682165443
>>682165570
I meant details on how it feels, and if tightness is somehow adjustable

>>682165605
seriously dude
hhnnnnnnggg
i can imagine how bad that would hurt
a fucking solid chunk of metal sprung into my dong

>>682165679
you can find them in all sizes, the first one I did this two was really to big, its not tight at all, then some others are smaller like the multi section caterpillars and thus tighter, and they are really good at creating suction too! the sensation is great for the cheap ass price!

>>682166019
what if you put like rubber bands across the thing to make them tighter? ever tried?

>>682165679
it's a flimsy latex shit, it's tightness depends on how hard you grab it, and i haven't tried it myself but i assume it feels like fucking a bobbly (couldnt think of a word less retarded) vagina?

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>>682165679
I tried to make a sex toys with these amazing little balls, you can buy enough to fill a bathtub for $8 on amazon, Orbeez or water beads

>>682165388
i've added and messaged, did you spell your kik correctly? just making sure

>>682166455
Share results
are they good?
how did you do it

>>682159936
Good way to destroy small blood vessels in your dick and can cause impotence. So feels like that if you screw it up.

never tried any of these methods to masturbate but how much better are they compared to actual masturbation?

>>682166279
nope haven't tried, but what I did was put it in a box with a hold with zipties holding the opening and fucking the box!

>>682166848
its just creative i guess

>>682157156
look where you are fag.

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>tenga egg
>feels good
>only $2

>>682166628
well they are so squishy its hard to come up with a way to hold them in place while having a hole for your dick that doesn't allow them to squirt out when you push in. also they get cold quick, you can warm them with hot water but never microwave, they explode! so in need more time to engineer the best way to use them. But just sticking my feet in a bucket of them gave me a boner!

>>682164677
I'm in America, what state?

>>682167277
They look soft and nice to rub the dick in
What about taking a rubber glove or a condom and filling it with the beads then just put the dick in?

>>682157156
well let's see your proposed solution then, kike

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>>682166455
they also make vibrating foot massages that hold these water beads for teen girls, I think we can use it somehow!!

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>>682156844
>9 months
too old

>>682159834
Guy sounds creepy as fuck

>>682167568
$9 bucks for a shit load, give them a shot and report back http://www.amazon.com/Jelly-BeadZ-JB-Water-Rainbow/dp/B00A811T74/

>>682155296
Have sex with a woman, ejaculate inside woman.
>homemade sex toy in 9 months

hey guys since we all now know how to make a homemade sex toy go to this cola room and post porn to try them out

>>682167224
Link?

>>682168856
r/zz6e6M

>>682168222
how original... trips wasted on a faggot.

>>682156844

>>682168929
www.aliexpress.com/wholesale?catId=0&initiative_id=SB_20160501140406&SearchText=tenga+egg

>>682156844
well done

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>>682155296

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>>682155296

banana instructional

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1g8rlFP0J8c

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>>682155296

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>>682170837
and in non-slavspeak

>>682167224
>2$
nah try 15 for ONE.

>>682171051
Can any fags comfirm. Thought this one crushes your dick

>>682156844
>not removing access appendages like arms and legs first

>>682171823
Honestly it always just fell apart for me. Might've just not used enough starch both times though.

>>682172171
Agree on this, falls apart pretty quickly, you have to get the mixture right and usign a plastic container so you don't have to pull it out helps too.
Overall pretty meh feel, cannot compare to an onahole.

>>682171051
>>682171823
>>682172171
Doesn't this make oobleck? and like when you try to fap with it it turns solid and kills your dick?

https://youtu.be/9e5GoVciKZA

I use this one daily.

>>682158721
sound?

>polish yt channel foodemperor

>>682172601
Too easy to break, doesn't feel very good.
I used to have a can of pringles with those packing foam sheet rolled inside and put a condom in it, better than a glove but will still break pretty soon and feel is okay only for a teenage kid.

>>682172501
lol no, the starch mix gelifies when cooked.
Also, you'd need a much higher starch-to-water ratio anyway to make a proper non-newtonian fluid. And even then it only goes solid when you really hit it.

>>682172838
I dissemble mine when I'm done since I usually jizz in the glove, it gets the job done when I don't want to use my hand.

>>682155296
Use potato starch you fucking moron.

>>682173004
what does it feel like to fuck a non newtonian fluid, assuming that you thrust fast like sonic?

>>682160904
Those are LAYS you motherfucker.

Do not attempt, a Lay's can will blow your dick clean off.

>>682171051
Kek wrong one.

>>682173254
awkward I guess?
try it.

>>682166848
The key is that it can help cure "deathgrip syndrome".

>>682174198
This

So much this.

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>>682174198
>>682174701
what is deathgrip syndrome anon

>>682174955
Basically nothing can compare to the tightness you create with your hand
and over time you grip dick harder and harder
to the point that you'll just need more and a normal vagina will feel loose as fuck
Poorly explained but I think you get it

>>682174198
>deathgrip syndrome
What's that, when you become lord of the game?

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>>682167224
>fit pretty well inside a toilet paper roll
>obviously useless for big cocks

Towel
Belt
Latex Glove
Rubberband

>>682174955
Even the tightest pussy won't compare to gripping hard with your hand, you won't be able to cum what you fuck the real thing.

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>>682175573

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>>682159130
Bruh marry me

>>682175396
>>682175272
>>682174955
A condition in which frequent masturbation by hand desensitizes the nerves in the cock, thus lessening the pleasure of the penis

>>682175472
Yea, that won't work

>>682175272
>>682175638
>>682175739
ok so i have the opposite of that

would deathgripping help in moderation?

>>682175472
False
the egg can strecht a lot, it can fit any cock size

>>682176091
what
what do you mean
everything is too tight for you?

>>682155296
Cut your dick off and put it in alcohol over night.

A while ago I had the perfect homemade male masturbator, I used a cardboard tube used for shipping posters with electrical tape on it to make it more "waterproof", put a couple of sponges in there and would use a new latex glove every time, and I stuffed it between my mattress and box spring, it made masturbation fun again, but it also gave me the level of shame that I got from jerking off when I was a kid, and one time that shame was so bad that I threw it away, this thread is making me want to build a new, better version

>>682176137
I think he's saying that you can put it inside the roll to make fucking it easier, but the roll is too small for big dicks.

>>682176464
to use the egg you just put your cock tip in, then with fingers you grab the egg by the lower border and strecht it up and down, you're going extracurricular if you try to use it like a fleshlight

>>682174955
If you wank too much and too tight with your hands, you will find it near impossible to jack off with the feeling of a vagina. Getting a fleshlight or a hole that is just about your dick size can prevent this.

>>682164677

Faggot go kill yourself

>>682155296
go buy an onahole
unless you live with your parents, there's no reason not to

cleanup can be a pain unless you get a cheap flippable Tenga hole though (unless you want to get an infection from mold in your dick)

>>682166941
that's wrong
orgasm is much better with an onahole
like, mindblowing

the texture is different, and it moves your dick differently.

>>682176833
he's definitely gone bud, you lost your chance, you can tell me to kill myself if it makes you feel better.

>>682171051
dont do it this makes mustard gas

>>682177133
i'm sorry to ask this but what is onahole?
weeb word for fleshlight?

>>682177214
leave us alone, all we want to do is jerk off with some home grown crystals.

>>682176827
so ive tried a fleshlight but it felt like fucking a vaccuum

is that normal? i stopped using it after

>>682177368
pretty much, fleshlight is like the band-aid of onaholes, their brand name has become the common term for the item.

>>682158721
Tried this and you have to have a micropenis for this to work. The fucking hole is too small and isn't deep enough

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>>682176760
>extracurricular

>>682155296
>kill neighbors cat
>rip arms and legs off
>sow up wounds
>keep head if desired
>use lube
>fuck asshole

>when decomposition is too much
>repeat process
better than any fleshlight I've ever bought

>>682177491
depends on the model, some are designed to make that effect, some aren't

>>682155296
no, because i'm not a cheap fuck, so i went and got a reusable tenga off amazon.

>>682155296
>buy a zuchini
>shove it up your ass.
>get off on it like the fag you are.

NEETfag still living with my parents. Any way to get a toy sent to my house without them finding it?

>>682163967
DONT DO THIS I REGRETTED IT SO MUCH

>>682178140
"but why?"

>>682163242
>That top nub pressing right on my dick hole
No thanks

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>>682157248

>>682178135
make it be sent to your local post office, go pick it up there and lie about what it is (say like it's a piece for your bike/car/something related to studying I don't know think of something), think of a place to hide it (not the usual shit, think of somewhere only you have access to)

>>682163242
not gonna lie. bought a tenga before and was so dissatisfied.
it was way to short and way to tight.

what did I expect, made in japan

>>682178767
dude i dont know but it sounds like you gonna get fucking fungus on your dick or shit

or maybe the fucking retard didn't let the banana cool off after microwaving it

>>682179093
you can have packages sent to the post office?

>find cup
>add a cup or corn starch
>add a cup of water
>stir very very very very well u cannot have any clumps on it
>add another cup of water
>stir
>stir
>put in microwave for 1min
>should look like rubbery wax
>grab something that is the same thickness/length as your dick stick it in don't make it a bin hole just a right hole
>stick in microwave for 30 secs
>then the same object u used for making the little hole in the center stick it again in there like 3/4 or 2.5/4 of the way in
>then put it in the refrigerator for 4 or 40 minutes
>ram ur dick into that shit

>>682178140
spiders in bananas
>brown recluse bite his dick

>>682179572
this guy knows his fuckin stuff

>>682179453
in my country, yes, you get sent a notification at your home or phone when it arrives for you to go pick it up whenever you can
I do it all the time whenever I purchase stuff on used goods sites when I buy stuff for my car n'shit, I don't like giving my address to unknown people so I get them sent to my local post office

>>682179863
but do you live in burgerland?

>>682180276
no, but don't you american people got PO boxes? aren't they similar thing?

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>>682155528
>free sadness
zozzle

>>682179572
How can you put a cup of corn starch AND a cup of water in just one cup?
Seems like bullshit to me.

>>682162141
I've just tried it. Shit is cash.

>>682181506
that thing feels almost like fucking with a condom on. Little less tight, and it isn't as warm as real thing.

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>>682181375

>>682181375
Cup of water/cornstarch as in a unit of measurement. Cup as in a container big enough to hold all the ingredients

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>>682155528
underrated post

>>682181375
bro they mix and make one thing

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i have a problem with fleshlights, i always end up breaking them really fast, im not big im average at best but my dick its really fat and i always end up losing the tightness of my fleshlight and it end ups looking like if some one cut a vagina in half wiht a scalpel, any one had this problem, any product i could use instead of a fleshlight?

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>>682171051
>>682179572

want to try. What use for lube?

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>>682181375
europoor detected

>>682160885
>It tricks the mind
it tricks you into thinking your hand is sore as fuck and cant be moved.

>>682159834
wtf

>>682175272
>>682175638
>>682175739
So stop gripping so tightly you neurotics.

>>682183864
you made me laugh fuck you

>>682180460
is it possible to have the package delivered straight to the post office instead of having to redirect it mid delivery?

this ones simple. it only requires a debit card and in internet connection.
1. go to amazon.com
2. buy a sex toy

its that easy

>>682184634
as I said before, the way it works in my country I can just get it sent to my post office and I just get a notification via either phone or physical mail for me to go pick it up at the post office

>>682184634
>>682184867
I suggest you go to your local post office and ask them

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>>682155296

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Just use a pineapple it feels just like the real thing

a grapefruit, cut a hole of approx your dick size (for better results a bit smaller)

You have may been scared by that black woman on youtube but it actually makes a nice fuckhole

>>682185253
I imagine thats what its like to fuck a hawaiian girl

>>682185253
Not really more like what it is like to fuck a Hawaiian boy.

>>682185705
see >>682185831

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Never bought or used anything besides my hand. Bought these to try out. Are they actually better than a hand or are they a waste of money?

>>682155296
Congratulations. Officially the saddest thread ever.

>>682185873
I tried the last one (silky) and it wasn't good at all

>>682185873
much better than a hand, muuuch better

can reuse them about 50 times

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just buy a fleshlight the other feel like shit, i tried making almost all the ones i found off of google, and then i finally gave in and bought a fleshlight, i got the terra patrick one. it feels amazing almost as good a a bj but not as good as pussy, but make sure u get it war from hot water it feels better that way, and prepare to buy alot of water based lube. if u use soap or hand lotion or anything like that it dosent feel good at all, u need to use lube. the only down fall of te fleshlight is the clean up.

>>682185873
also >>682186083
I used clicker

it does make a click sound every tug but its so good.

>>682179572
i tried this its supper hard to do it almost fall apart, it seems good on paper, but getting the whole right for ur dick. it just dosent work. just buy a fleshlight.

https://youtu.be/DHJj9pvRCQc
,

>>682155528
Sounds like you don't understand male sexuality or biology.
Man should be allowed to ejaculate whenever he wants.

When you grow up you will release that women don't always want to fuck.

>>682185253
White people these days...

>>682185831
What are ya fucking gay?

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>>682167890
>>682156844

>>682185202
This works fine if a little bland

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>>682155296
fuck fleshlights. i used to love the movie gremlins. its still ok but not the best movie I've ever seen. anyway. i met this girl who also loves the movie gremlins. she said that it reminds her of her childhood. and for some reason the mogwai really turn her on. i ask how thats possible. the mogwai have absolutely no sexual features. no rounded ass, no raised breasts, no genetalia of any type. could it possibly be the fact that they transform into those slimy green gremlins? what is it? she refused tell me. i spent many nights afterwards watching gremlins and hoping maybe to get turned on a little bit. one night i got half a chub but I've since realized that was most likely just the air conditioner. eventually i couldnt take the mystery anymore. i MUST know what turns her on about the movie gremlins, if for no other reason than i want to be able to fuck a mogwai in the comfort of my own home. why should she be able to get so turned on by gremlins but I'm not even allowed to experience it? i corner her. she backs up. scared. my slow approach has her shaking and asking, "logan, whats gotten into u?" i tell her this is the end of the line. she must tell me why gremlins makes her pussy drip. here and now is the time or she will die by my average sized cock. I can tell that she's finally about to tell me, she's finally about to break. she takes a deep breath and dramatic music begins to play from the lunch room loud speakers across from mrs. shabotski's 5th grade class ( this was the song: http://youtu.be/dPiEVyd3-4k ) above the dulcid tones she tells me the thing i swore never to repeat. but i will tell it to you hear bros. i will tell it to you from my death bed. i will tell you the sexiest thing I've ever heard. that girl lets the real life gizmo live in her pussy. shit gets wild after midnight.

>>682186066
>>682186175
I'd imagine bigger grooves make it feel better. Looking forward to trying them.

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>>682188895

>>682187392
No not precisely.

More pedo than homo.

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>>682179572
>>682171051

Fuck You!!! I just tried this, now I have 3rd degree burns!

>>682185253
black people these days..

>>682185253
Japs these days

>>682155296
Glove inside handtowel+lube and ruber bands for pressure=pussy

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>>682155296

>>682191751
I imagine one of those that doesn't have little hard plastic pieces in it would be nice.

>>682155296
>get some olive oil
>spread it on finger
>stick up ass
>look for spongy spot about 2-3inches in
>if it feels good rub it
>lightly at first more pressure as time goes on
>start jacking it
>cum
youll shoot a massive load and feel a lot of relief from all built up fluid getting released

>>682186083
my hand has been good for about 20 years way better than 50 times

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>>682192057
prepare your anus, boys

>>682191751
mine wont fit into these.. im not big by any means..

>>682155296
You fuck a women
You wait 9 months
And boom, a homemade male sex toy

>>682192291
then get a real one, not the cheap tiny ones they give out in the crane machines at old grocery stores.

>>682161391
Aloe vera is a powerful laxative. You'll be cumming and going at the same time.

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>>682192474

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The only reason I want to live alone is so that I can buy shit like this, but you never know if you can trust the people you live with to not go through your shit
>inb4 underage I'm just a neet.

>>682187254
>grow up
>posts on /b/
pick one

>>682163967

this sounds plausibel

>>682170498
el porcupine

>>682159283
I wouldn't even consider my dick big in the slightest, but it doesn't fit in any vacuum attachment.

Easiest thing to do is buy a bicycle tire tube, get your dick hard and lubed up, get the tube lubed up, stretch it as far as you can and stick your dick in it. It's usually hard work to get it in, but it's so tight I usually bust in a minute.

I'll warn you, though. If it's not lubed up enough once you fully get in, it can and will hurt. You also might get stuck and have to cut it off. Just make sure you use A LOT of lotion/lube. Other than that, it's fucking great. If your dick is really fat, just buy the fattest tire tube you can find and you should be alright