Bump. C'mon guys.

>>678588256
Why do they get to tell you what to do? Because they have guns? Stand up for yourself and get your own guns. The only rights you have in this world are the ones you can defend.

Did 3 years state time in Ohio (medium security). I'm a white suburban kid and it was honestly pretty easy. Didn't get in a single fight.

The psychological shit is the hardest part.

>>678588754
>get your own guns. The only rights you have in this world are the ones you can defend
>defend against choppers with rifle and Walmart shotgun
As an Apache attack helicoptor this triggered me.

>>678588754
What.
No.
What? I got caught with LSD and have been on probation for over a year, but violated the conditions of my probation 4 times, and if I came up positive for alcohol, it will be my 5th and my PO told me I'm looking at prison time with the elimination of probation. I'm looking for advice in case of the worst case scenario

Correctional officer here:

The good news is that you will do your time in a county jail and not a true prison - any sexual activity you might encounter, which is rare to begin with, will absolutely be less likely in jail than in prison.

Second, fights and violence are usually brought on by pissy inmates being offended or somehow insulted by you. People doing time in county jail can have their gain time taken away for fighting and therefore are less likely to want to fight you, especially for dumb shit.

Regular "shit kickings" would be exceedingly rare given that you will be in there for a common drug crime and VOP - half the people in there will be there for VOP. If you are in a large urban jail such as LA county or Riker's Island you should worry more because more inmates = more trouble. Otherwise, stop being a pussy and get through it.

>>678588256
bumpin with music to chill op

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zXbSfl0O3qU&nohtml5=False

>>678589049
Holy shit this applies to me. White suburban 21 year old in Ohio. (I'm OP.)

>>678589384
What county??

>>678588256
Like anywhere else in the world, if you show you're willing to defend yourself you're less likely to be targeted

>>678589653
Medina County. In fact I live in the city of Medina.

>>678589327
I appreciate the opinion of someone who works with inmates. Thank you so fucking much anon!

>>678588256
No such thing as less than a year prison time, guy. Maybe a state inmate in a country jail. But not in prison.

>>678590294
County. Phone autocorrect.

>>678588256
Depends entirely on the jail you're going too.

county jails and shit are no issue.

It's prisons you should worry about, overcrowded as fuck ones mostly.

More overcrowded = more fucked up, without a doubt.

The guards end up just not bothering to do their job properly. They will even manufacture events that gets inmates beaten/raped/murdered in the worst ones.

You will almost certainly be fine.

>>678590294
Hmm. My girlfriend went to the female prison in Marysville for 6 months for the same crime.

If that's the case I'm slightly relieved but I still at this point would take the comfort of sobriety than jail...and truthfully, I don't even do LSD or heavy drugs much at all. I just like to smoke weed, and every violation thus far has been weed related. So on the bright side if I get a jail sentence, I will be done, get out, and be able to blaze up again. I made a mistake, and now I've been sentenced to 3 yrs probation for it. Which, my gf, who like I said has been to jail for 6 months, says it's way better than being watched for 3 years.

>>678589849
Hmmm I'm not too familiar with that area. I was sentenced out of Allen county which is NW Ohio.

The good news is I'm sure the jail isn't too bad (as opposed to places like Columbus).

I think Medina County sends inmates to Lorain Correctional for classification. Most of the state sends them to CRC in Columbus (where I went initially).

You'll probably start at Lorain (2 man cells) and then get moved to a medium security prison (open dorms).

Some prisons are worse than others. But just keep to yourself and you'll be fine. Few people, if any, will fuck with you. Most of the people that get fucked up in prison bring it upon themselves. You don't have to be hardcore or hood to survive in prison. Don't get me wrong, you need to stand up for yourself, but it's not something you'll have to do regularly.

>>678589216
nigger are you fucking retarded or something? how the hell do you violate 5 times? you deserve to be in prison for being so fucking brain dead.

>>678589216
>violated the conditions of my probation 4 times
get some self-control, you stupid son of a bitch

>>678590294
When I was in prison I saw guys come in with 6-9 months. It just depends on the state you're in (this was in Ohio).

Don't downplay fights in county. Happen daily, if not more. Don't give anyone a reason to think you're a rat. Whether you are or not, sometimes people get upset when others take a plea, it's first offence, whatever, and don't get some stupid ammount of time. Say what needs to be said, nothing more. Anyway, I have met some of the coolest, realest people in county. Watch TV, read, gain some weight. Get in a routine and it will pass. Seems like the first and last week are the slowest. First because of adapting and getting your own system going. The last because you know you will be out soon. Don't count days.. And fuck that phone. Nothing gets you pressed the fuck out like the phone. Good luck man. You got this.

>>678590896
I'm very middle of the road. I'm not a cunt or shit-starter but I'm also not a pushover. I just try to explain the benefits and if anything I'd offer trade agreements with inmates (like my gf said she did when she got locked up)

You sound like you haven't fucking learned anything. Jesus.

Yeah, I get that weed should be legal, but it's not. If you're so much of a fuck up that you can't just give it up when you knew you risked going to prison, I hope you do get raped and learn a fucking lesson.

Sort your life out, anon.

>>678588256
Let me guess, you're not the type of guy who takes LSD to explore innerspace/enlighten oneself

You just like to take acid, drink and smoke weed to get wasted like a dumb fuck

>>678589216
You stupid niggerbrained fuck

>>678591285
OP here, I am in Ohio too.
>>678591121
>>678591238
I know, I know guys, I understand I'm fucking stupid. I am just in love with the reefer. If I go to prison, which is why I posted this, I just want some advice. I get that I'm stupid, that's not helpful.

Ohio here too. Stark county

>>678591644
Not entirely true. (OP again) every time I've take psychedelics it's been to embark on a philosophical journey, but I was a dumb 19 year old cunt who was smoking blunts with his windows rolled up, carrying 3 pieces on him with percocets, kalonopin, 6 open containers of alcohol and ofc acid. I was lucky enough to only get charged with the acid, but don't get me wrong I wasn't doing it "only to get fucked up" I've had some of the most meaningful and life changing experiences on hallucinogens

>>678591701

Well maybe if you're forced to say it enough, it will be helpful. Stop being an utter fucking failure as a human being, you pathetic wretch.

Put the fucking drugs down for a while. Read some books. Travel. Do something with your life.

If you're not a better person by the end of this, it's all over for you. This here is your wakeup call. Either get up, or get out.

>>678588256
In the worse case scenario happens and you do get sent to prison, then just try to keep yourself to yourself. Do your time, don't snitch, and don't get involved in any drama that'll get you killed. Stay calm and keep your head down.

Nope: Prison doesn't make anybody, not, a criminal. The only thing prison does is make criminals into tougher, more violent, criminals.
Do yourself a favor, and the first person who tries to fuck with you, punch them in the face as hard as you can.
I mean really try to kill the fucker with your hands.

>>678591375
Yeah you'll be alright. If anyone comes up to you early on and tries to start shit with you (or more likely try to take your stuff) just stick up for yourself and fight them if necessary, and after that you'll almost definitely be left alone. The only people that get harassed regularly are sex offenders and people that rack up debts with gangs.

But if you have any questions about prison in Ohio let me know.

>>678591375

Same corrections officer here again:

NO NO NO NO NO. I understand that your girlfriend made deals and it worked for her but female inmates are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT when it comes to trading and dealing in jail than men. If you make deals and trades, you are way more likely to get hurt or get robbed. Someone will try to steal from you or try to get you to welsh on the bet so they can fight you. Do not underestimate the extreme situations that arise out of stupid deals like trading phone time, trading meals, swapping books or even swapping parts of the newspaper. Stay away from inmate commerce and mind your own business.

>>678590886
Can't wait to get out and "blaze up"? You're a stupid fuck. All of your problems are drug and alcohol related. Why not just get sober for a few years and enjoy your freedom?

Protip: free and sober> in jail and sober

Evenough though some of you have been unhelpful, insulting cunts about my situation because you merely want to affirm your pretentious beliefs of self-serving superiority over me, the good lot of you have been fucking awesome in giving me some good tips and whatnot and I greatly appreciate it. I even appreciate you assholes, because I know i fucked up and I'm a fucking idiot, I get that, but I literally do appreciate all feedback, you guys have been the best.

>>678588256
>this past Wednesday I drank heavily and got wasted

So you showed up to drug testing while drunk? Or did you have other shit in your system?

Also, you seem to have issues with self control. I'd work on that immediately, prison or no prison...

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>>678592859
So what is your suggestion, CO anon? Should I just accept whatever my gf sends me and just keep to myself? Wanting to be solitary won't get the shit kicked out of me?

>>678593070

I have a feeling you've had a severe lack of people in your life giving you honest feedback.

Calling you a fucking failure is absolutely in your best interests, because you're too fucking stupid to see it yourself.

Sort your fucking life out, mate.

>>678592859
99% of inmates engage in some sort of commerce. You probably shouldn't jump right into it but if you can feel people out and have even the slightest bit of common sense you won't have any problems.

>>678593133
No no no, I didn't have anything else in my system. I stopped drinking at 3am (approx.) and tested around 4pm but I was still hungover when I took the test, even efter drinking tons of water (they test for BAC not EtG aND I'm sure of that) but it doesn't stop me from bugging the fuck out.

>>678588256
Watch that prison show on a&e
>Get in good with pod bosses
>Settle all debts or bets you may rack up with cell mates
>If anything happens in your cell block you didnt see anything
>Never call anyone a bitch

>>678593857
>watch that prison show on A&E

Because reality TV has always been super accurate in its portrayal of real people.

Also when it comes to your PIN don't trust anyone.
>they will rip you off

>>678588256
Kek. Americans get thrown in prison for the dumbest things

>>678594128
OP here and duh. I may be autistic but I don't have down syndrome Jesus fucking Christ.

>>678594101
It's more realistic than American History X or anything similar

>>678594128
Definitely this. Fucking learned the hard way.

>>678594326
Yeah I fucking know right?

>>678594101
My dad works at a prison and watched it he said it was fairly accurate. The prison in the show is overcrowded.

Every prison is likely different but it might give you a good idea what to expect.

>>678594409
He means the PIN number they give you to use the phone.

>>678594572
And order commissary

>>678594572
And I get thay, remember my gf was locked up. This is obviously personal information you shouldn't give away.

prison/jail is a really shitty place to be. that being said, it's not as bad as the movies make it out to be. (unless you did some seriously fucked up shit and get sent to a high security or federal prison)
after a month or so on the inside, repetition will take over and you won't concentrate as much on how much time you have left.
you will focus more on the day.

>>678593501

Wanting to keep to yourself is not the same as being totally anti social and weird. Remember, jail is a group setting and you have to live with a lot of grown men in a small space all day and night long. Conversing, laughing, and communicating with people is normal and expected. But what is not smart is trading food (which is actually money) or phone time (also money) or pictures (money too) for anything. Keep what is yours, YOURS. And if someone takes it, you can either rat, fight or let it go - either way, there are bad consequences. And you might have to figure out the "least bad" one.

that sucks op.
i've never been to prison, only jail. my best mate however has spent 15 years inside. i've spoken a lot with him about what it's like, how to cope etc. in a nutshell: be nice. be funny. be happy. be a likable person. if you can make people laugh, you'll be fine.
if like myself you're socially retarded and won't be able to, then just keep yourself to yourself. don't look people in the eye, don't trust anyone, don't accept anything from anyone (someone offers you a smoke? politely decline. you do not want to be indebted to anyone in prison. accept anything and they will come back at you and say that you owe them)
don't trust guards, they're worse than the inmates.
on the day you go in, say that you shit the bed. that'll get you your own cell.
don't use heroin. one way or another you'll end up HIV positive.
don't bother taking anything in with you except for clothes. it'll just be taken from you.
consider taking in some lsd. soak some boxer shorts in it or something. if you need money it'll be handy.

most importantly, do not hold a grudge about the fact that you're in prison. learn meditation. listen to eckhart tolle/alan watts - you can cope. getting angry will get you beaten up.

good luck man. the war(t) on drugs is absolutely motherfucking evil. peace bro.

>>678594827
fighting is the best answer in my experience. even if you get beat down, they will think twice and probably try and find an easier target.

>>678594827
Ratting is almost always the worst choice.

Inmates detest two things above all else: sex offenders and rats. If you're either you're automatically an outkast and a huge target.

>>678594827
>you can either rat
end up severely beaten
>fight
more jail time, or end up getting beaten by prison gangs
>or let it go
Become a "bitch". an easy target to be ripped off because you will do nothing.

None of them sound good

>>678588256
You should have gotten help for you addiction faggot. Or at least held off until you were off probation. Get some self control you sad beta fuck. Now grow up and accept your punishment.

>>678589327
COPS ON 4CHAN FUCK

>>678588256
>I have gotten 4 probation violations already for weed, however, this past Wednesday I drank heavily and got wasted

So sad to see another marijuana addict sent to prison. Why is it so hard to stop using? I mean you are going to prison because you couldn't stop using reefer. Yet people JOKE about this highly addictive substance.

>>678588256
>drugs
Fucking pleb

>>678590886
>So on the bright side if I get a jail sentence, I will be done, get out, and be able to blaze up again.

Well, I'm glad you've learned your lesson!

>>678595467
>Correctional officer

that isn't a cop you fucking retard

>>678595410
Fighting is at least respected and very rarely results in more time, unless you fuck someone up horribly.

The beating you'll receiving for ratting will be much worse than the beating you'll receive for sticking up for yourself.

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>>678589216
Well OP its this simple, stop smoking weed. Pretty inconcievable i know. You're white, so just don't be a degenerate and you won't go to prison most of the time.

>>678595071
I like thus advice. I'm in a weird postion, I'm anti-social for the most part but when I do hang with people they think I'm either really smart or really funny, so maybe that will come in handy.
>>678595126
My brother (who has spent 2 years in prison) says that displaying your violent dominance over the rest of the inmates is a means of getting them to not fuck with you.

Now, I'd say it would probably be due to who you're surrounded by, and I don't want to go in assuming every inmate is an uncontrollable animal of violence and stupidity. Even the C.O. anon expressed that inmates are smarter than primates.

>>678590886
>I'd rather be in a cage for 6 months than unable to do drugs for 3 years
>drugs are more important than my freedom
Fucking retard

not op. i've wanted an answer to this question for forever. can anon help?
yo i have an intestinal disorder which can be fatal. i treat it using a dietary approach. this dietary approach id not yet recognised by medical science as being effective, even though it is.
my question: how hard is it to source the food i want? i can pretty much guarantee prison food would not be allowed by my diet. what do i need to do in order to get the food i need? is there any way to get food shipped in? can i buy it? am i gonna starve to death if i'm sent down?

i can ONLY eat: unprocessed meats, non-starchy veg, eggs, nuts and all fruits.

anyone? pls

>>678595939
I am bugging about drinking tho. I'm fine with quitting weed but I am quick to substitute it with heavy alcohol use.

>>678596228
Honestly you are probably fucked anon.
Prison food is not any of those things and they will not cater to your needs.
>it all comes down to feeding people for less than $1 a meal

>>678596623
ugh. so there's no way?
if i could just have, say, a tin of tuna and an apple every day, i'd be fine. not gonna happen?

>>678596208
Thanks, you're very helpful.
I haven't even been smoking, only drinking. Fuck off if you've got nothing helpful to say.

>>678595830
In prison they're referred to as cops.

is it possible to be gay - maybe suck some cock when you feel like it, and NOT be turned into someone's bitch?

>>678596101
i was just saying that fighting was the best option out of the 3.
rat
fight
let it go

>>678596228
buy a plane ticket to nicaragua and disappear.

>>678596754
huh that is weird, but I guess it makes sense. learned somethin' today!

>>678596962
>dear diary

>>678595071
He can't even say no to a joint when on some serious probation, do you really think he'll be able saying no to a smoke??

>>678596729
You need your priorities straight, son.
If you're going full retard, I'll say so
This isn't Tumblr.

>>678593009

This just shows that we need to stop putting people in jail for minor drug offenses. It doesn't teach anything and just wastes taxpayer money.

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>>678596898
Yeah but isn't there some way to diplomatically solve things?

Actually, I will give you a picture of me, and you can tell me based on it how fucked I am.

>>678595709
Kek

>>678596704

Medical staff do a full assessment at intake and will put you on a special diet when you arrive. Yes they will cater to your dietary needs.

>>678597239
well at least you are too disgusting to want to rape. I wouldn't get my dick near that disgusting hole of your mouth.

Seriously, I can smell you from here.

>>678596491

You are still a fucking addict?!?!
Does 4chan need to do a fucking intervention on your stupid fuck ass???

>>678597333
>Yes they will cater to your dietary needs.
even if medical science currently doesn't recognise that the diet is effective? there's nothing but my word that i need these foods, but i will legit be bleeding internally within 24hrs if i eat anything i shouldn't.

...btw, anyone have colitis/crohns? google "specific carbohydrate diet" - it will change your life.

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>>678597170
the for profit prison system isn't a waste of money if you're the fat kike making billions off of war on drugs. turn your fucking brain on.

>>678596228
Make sure to switch to regular medical therapy before you get locked up.

>>678597170
OP here. I completely agree! Drug addiction is a health problem not a crime problem, but of course I exist in a corrupt governmental moment when it comes to this

>>678588256

OP, I hope nothing too shitty happens to you in prison, but you definitely need to be in prison.

I'm not saying you're a "bad guy", but the fact that you couldn't weigh the benefits of not being high/drunk versus losing your basic fucking rights and freedoms for most likely several years from a life that no one is certain how long will last is telling.

Perhaps spending several sober years with nothing to focus on but yourself will straighten you out.

>>678597170
Technically i believe he would be going to jail for a probation violation, in other words for being a fucking idiot. Have fun in jail beta.

>>678597530
>>678597530
that is addiction for you.

>>678597595
>switch to regular medical therapy
what do you mean, like medications? none of them work, the only thing which works is this diet

>>678596779
You'd still be a faggot, like OP.

>>678597553
If you bleed internally after eating certain foods then medical science does recognize the condition, but your word will mean absolutely nothing to corrections or medical staff. They see you all as liars. Sad but true, never ever trust an inmate.

>>678597405
Thanks man!

>>678597553
any reason you can't go to a doctor and get it documented so you'll be able to prove your butthole is broken?

>>678588256
You are a ducking loser.

Don't do drugs.

If you are on probation don't choose to do more crimes.

I hope you go prison and get raped.

>>678597717
You're not a doctor!

Did 10 years at centenela for gun possession with a kilo of heroin.

Never had any real problem and with the rape act they don't acknowledge it's happening to keep numbers down so you have to rat and that isn't good.

I had a wife for five years ee call them women but he was a skinny Puerto Rican kid. Most want the skinny white boys but they get taken pretty fast.

Having a wife is nice she keeps the cell clean writes letters for you and you get their holes when you want.

The funny thing about it is I'm not gay you just do what you do while there. If your gonna get raped their isn't really anything you can do. Like with my crew if you fight one of us off he'll come get the rest of us.

If you still try to fight we just bust your teeth out and take turns getting blowjobs so you can't bite our cocks. That only happened twice most the time you'll give the butt pussy once you beat you until you didn't wanna fight.

>>678597639
>several sober years
Look, mate, I'm not gonna insult your intelligence but the very maximum time for my sentence is one year. ONE year. Please dont get this mixed up into something larger.

>>678597998
shut up, chaddddd.

>>678597239
hard to judge. you look like a cool anon.
if you are going in for your original charge, (LSD) you won't be put in with the hardened criminals.
they have different pods for different types of offenders. chances are, you will be put in there with people like yourself. if someone tries to take something from you, just say no and let it be. if they fuck with you about it, stand up for yourself.
i doubt that you will even go to prison though. maybe jail, possibly a 120 shock incarceration.

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>>678598106
fake and gay.

>>678588256
Just start heading to Mexico now.

>>678598106
Doesn't happen in california state prisons my boy

Former level 4 inmate

>>678597794
>medical science does recognize the condition
there are a million things which can cause a flare-up. no way to prove it was the food.
16 years i've been living with this disease though. i KNOW it's the food. huge numbers of people online are using this diet. almost no doctors are aware of it though and there's no pill to be sold, it's all diet-based treatment, so no pharmacorps will research whether it works or not.

>>678597847
again, it's on my med records that i have the illness, but there's no proof that diet has any affect.

ugh, i'm fucked. i'm a heroin addict with no qualifications and lots of debt. bound to go down soon, don't wanna die just because i had fuck all to eat.

>>678597239
You look like a nice lady.

>>678588256
>4 probation violations already for weed
Why did you do that you stupid fuck.

>>678597696
That's exactly why I broke up with my last bf. It was just a matter of time before his dumb ass wentry to jail because he was so fucking obsessed with drugs. I seriously rather fuck a neckbeard brony than another selfish immature stoner who feels they have no responsibility to society.

>>678597777
>678597777
>>678597777
nice quads

>>678597777
Hello Jesus.

>>678591621
This>>678592409
Ackshually.jpg

>>678598431
how is your doctor not documenting that your diet plays a role?! that makes no sense.

>>678598068
no but Dr Natasha Campbell McBride is, she put me on this diet. so too is Dr S Valentine Haas, who invented the diet 80 years ago. still no medical proof that it works, because it's never been put through medical trials - no profit in a dietary approach.

>>678598524
What's your skype?

>>678598106
>kilo of heroin
jesus christ. how much is that worth?

>>678598556
Samefag here. Just noticed. Haven't gotten good rolls in a while.

>>678598129

fucking kek, you're the one who might be about to go to jail because you just couldn't bring yourself to stop smoking your precious weed.

I apologize, you're clearly a bright one, I'll try to be smart like you.

>>678598431

What will happen is that you will have a medical emergency or go on a hunger strike until the administration plays the game and gives you what you want - the bottom line is, you won't get the food you need until you push hard enough. Inmates can sometimes be extraordinarily gifted at getting what they want from the institution if they are willing to go far enough. I know an inmate who literally literally shoved a paperclip through his penis - not into the piss hole, THROUGH the shaft. He then shoved rusty paint chips into his asshole and banged his head into a cell wall. He did all this to get out of the block he was housed in, and he got it and so much more

>>678589216
I can't imagine they're gonna test you for alcohol, but how did you avoid jail time with 4 other fucking violations? You get the snitcher's special of the year or something?

>>678597598
Drug addiction? You were busted for cid and weed...can't get addicted to cid, and pot addiction is a joke. Don't cry about the time, you got busted. Maybe when you get out you won't be such a dumbfuck

>>678598661
So ask Natasha to call up your warden and explain your situation.

>>678598579
joke's on you christfag I'm a gaytheist

>>678598657
>how is your doctor not documenting that your diet plays a role?
they've put it in my notes, but there's no proof, there are a million things which can cause it to flare up, they won't accept that it's proven.
a decade and a half i've had the disease. like tens of thousands of others, i know it works. if i eat something i shouldn't even by accident,. i end up ill.

>>678598303
(OP again) Thanks man, and the thing is that my gf (after being in prison) told me that the prison I go to and what level I will be placed in will depend on my crime; which was non-violent, and the lowest form of felony charge.

>>678598877
>hunger strike
i'm in england though, not allowed to go on hunger strike, they'll force feed me.

>>678598723
No Skype just kik:
BrigetGG

>>678590294
That's definitely not true.
You can do any amount of time in jail or prison your judge tells you to.

>>678594409
You violated you parole 4 times, mabye 5, you are lower than downy.

>>678598912
there's still no proof though, even if i do have doctors saying that they're convinced it works

>>678598945
another question. how long were you in jail for each time you violated?

>>678599107
Ok now I'm just annoyed. I can't fix your butthole dude. I don't know what to tell you.

>>678599096
He is become nigger, retard of society

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I did 10 months in a county jail for a minor drug crime.

Dont make close friends

Dont excessivly purchace commisary others who have not get jelous

Dont talk to much about your family or where you live

Everybody is going through their court process they will be on best behavior. However those few people in for big crimes will be stressed. Do not ask people for details on why they are there. If you know something the cops may try to get you to talk.

Dont tell on people, no matter what they say.

Going to the hole isnt scary. Its just you by yourself. Its stright not a big deal

Dont cough twards people

Dont be smelly or dirty

Dont eat near peoples beds

Have manners

Its like its own world, just remember your visiting.

I was 21 white upper class suburb kid.

Remember your not a republican!

You will learn what a nigger really is dont be suprised

>>678588256
Your girlfriend is going to fuck so many people while you're away, can I get her number OP?

>>678598879
Nope. They only test for BAC, not EtG a d idk, I just come off as such a sincere dude every time I fuck up when I meet with my PO, I'm starting to consider myself the master of dodging bullets.

>>678599231
ugh, thanks anyway anon. i've been worried about this shit for years. i don't give a fuck about being beaten up or raped ffs, the only thing which worries me about prison is the damn food.

guess i'll just... try not to break the law.

>tucks into 150mg of heroin

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>>678588256
I went to prison and it was really about taking no shit. The only people you take shit from are the Correctional Officers because they can fuck your world up inside.

My first day in somebody tried to bitch me down and I fought him. Got my ass kicked and the other inmates still tried me but if you back down once you make yourself a target.

>mfw I actually met my cousin for the first time while serving my time

>>678597598
Take some responsibility cunt. It's YOUR problem.

>>678599409
I don't think buttlove will be good for your butthole.

>>678599192
No time. I spent one night in jail the night I got caught with cid

Also throw your stupid ass on the mercy of the judge.
Beg and plead to the judge to send your ass to fucking rehab.
Get a fucking grip on how serious your life is about to get fucked.

>>678599409
it shouldn't be that difficult to stay out of the booty house dude.

>>678598129
Haha you are going to get fucking killed. You are argumentative as fuck

>>678599420
>>678599420
can you give me a play by play of people fucking with you? sometimes I have a hard time telling when I'm getting pushed around .. especially niggers when they start to fuck with me, I stand up, and they are like

JUSS PLAYIN JUSS PLAYIN LOL

please green text what you mean, or how someone might fuck with you .. uh is "heart check" a real term?

what's a typical prison diet?
is there any fresh fruit?
are there lots of vegetables?
what's the meat like?
can i have food sent in from outside?

argh, so para about this shit. sorry to shit up your thread with my obscure problem op. good luck getting through it mate.

>>678599591
But actually fuck use rehab instead using as vaction. Dump you shit girlfriend, get a good job and be a worth while person you idiot.

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The day you go ware 2 pairs white socks and 2 or 3 white shirts. Bring boxers with no print. White only

>>678598132
Kys

>>678599341
Sure, her number is 330-321-47 not gonna give away the rest cuz I don't need that shit. Guess the last 2 digits and congrats, you'll be talking to an asexual who has been raped and thinks sex is revolting. Good luck.

>>678599903
white bread.
jam, sometimes jelly.
peas and carrots, green beans.
processed and grade D.
no.

>>678588256
I have. 15 months there and 8 months on parole. It was a military prison though so things will be a bit different. You will probably get tested to see if you're a bitch: that's to say if you won't stand up for yourself. Rape is not nearly as common as popular culture would have you believe, but it does happen. Generally though it's to the guys who cower in confrontations as mentioned before. They'll see that and let them start hanging out with their crew so they get comfortable. That's when things go bad for the betas. I'm not saying go fight the first guy you see our anything but stand up for yourself. Try to make something positive of it: workout, study a subject that interests you, or you can always just play spades and watch TV like most guys do to pass the time.

>>678597239
You look like 2 things.

Both bad for prison.

You look like a pedo and a wimpy bitch

>>678588754
OP unless they regularly give you the ethanol test youre fine. And they usually dont because its like $40 per test. alcohol doesnt show up on a 5 panel or even a 12 panel for that matter

>>678599903
Just wear a diaper. Problem solved!

>>678588256
depends on what prison you go to..
but seriously why didint you just man up and ride out the probation... you knew this would happen.
you knew the first violation.. the second.. and the the third.. you deserve to be ass raped

>>678599565
HAHAHHA WHAT? you've never done time in county for violating and you're worried about prison?
SHHHHEEEIIIT i thought you were doing a month a two per violation.
they're gonna toss you in jail for a weekend or week of shock incarceration and continue with the probation.
you violated for alcohol bro. i think your mind is running wild and it is getting the best of you.
>been there, done that.

>>678600027

Kek

>>678600299
>ass rapist detected

>>678600118
>white bread.
zero chance i could eat it.
>jam, sometimes jelly.
same
>peas and carrots, green beans.
FUCK YES. that's more like it. idgaf if i eat nothing but a handful of this a day.
>processed and grade D.
nope.
>no.
shit.

alright i'll shut up. hearing that those vegetables are available has reassured me a bit. thanks.

>>678600229
nah it'd legit kill me bruh. ulcerative pancolitis doesn't fuck about

>>678600133
>get tested to see if you're a bitch

can you give me some specific examples? In highschool this would be something like throwing a lit cigarette butt at someone, or calling them a fag. How does it happen in prison?

like if someone bumps into you , that is you getting tested? Do you start throwing punches?

also where the fuck do you sit? do you ask if you can sit next to people? whats the protocol.

How accurate is this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqp0Bo_2644&nohtml5=False

I'm in AZ.

>>678588256
Prepare to be beaten up and raped by Bubba on daily basis.

Bubba also has HIV.

>>678600395
cant you buy shit from the store/commisary?

>>678600185
They give me a 10 panel. Alcohol is included but it's a very slim level of testing. Like I said they only test BAC (in urine)

>>678600395
you're not going to squirrel prison you fucking retard. you can't survive on carrots and green beans.

>>678600559
dunno mate, you tell me
>>678600610
>you can't survive on carrots and green beans.
i'd survive a hell of a lot longer than i would eating bread. 24 hours and i'll be bleeding internally.
yo all i eat at home is veg, fruit and meat. nothing else, not once, for a decade and a half

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>>678599903
Its nasty. You can save your bread and fruit to make spud juice.

If you get commisary you can make a cook up.

Tons of different kinds of cook up

1 ramen
Squeese cheese
Mayo pack
Chili ramen flavor
Some sausage
Some pickle

Learn how to make a plate from a chips bag

Learn how to start a fire with pensil leads and eracer using toliet paper and towel threads. Put in electric socket. Make fire

I would read before what is on the menu

If you can sneak some matches in your ass you have gold

>>678588256
LOL 6 months to 1 year? Thats not prison, thats jail. I did time OP, and I'm a sex offender. Prison was actually great, played DnD All day every day.
I actually liked prison better than I do out here, it made more sense... But I'm staying out for my father.

>>678600395
Who gives a fuck about you scum?

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>>678595480

>>678600834
>sex offender
>staying out of jail for father

cuz like you'd be fucking kids otherwise?

what kind of sex offense? were you in PC?

>>678590886
op i feel you im in exact same situation. Im on 3 yrs probation visit every week, but if you didnt ever violate thats only 1.5 years. Im currently suffering through not smoking weed, being afraid to ride in cars with friends to partys (if alcohol in car) but really the only thing you have to do is not smoke weed for a year and a half

>>678600816
the only thing on that list i can eat is the pickle

god dammit i'm so fucked if i ever go down.
>>678600915
hush, pleb.

>>678600792
Die in a bakery cunt

>>678600816
This dude can't keep anything in his asshole, he's certainly not using it to hoard contraband.

>>678600958
only a little bit of bait. the guy clearly has an addiction problem.

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>>678595480
I believe people like that exist, but not here

>>678600834
OP here. Drunk because I obviously haven't learned anything (the testing facility is closed on weekends) but thanks. I have heard you can actually make a lot of friends in jail too.

>>678600993
>were you in PC

>>678601052
no
what a peculiar thing to say

>>678594326
>>678594483
What country are ya'll from?

>>678600993
Man, prison was fine. Nobody gave a shit what you're there for. Jail is another story, but that's only a short while if your sentence is long enough. I had sex with a minor. And No, I was not in PC.

>>678601013
Calls me a pleb.

Is a fucking heroin user


Oooookay

>>678588256
just did 3 1/2 years for stealing a gun in Idaho, OP. you should be good, depending on what race you are. I heard Ohio State prisons are mostly blacks, so stick with the whiteys (or whatever your color is) and you should be OK. just don't get "in" with a gang, you dont wanna fux with that.. mind your Ps and Qs, be respectful,, clean your bunk area/cell regularly, dont say the words bitch or punk unless you wanna fight. you should be good

>>678589187
Kek. I agree with this post. The best thing you vould do in this situation is to start purchasing fire arms.

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>>678601001
Thank Christ someone gets me specifically

>>678601256
nobody gave a shit what you were in there for?
no, they didn't know. you would have got the shit kicked out of you.

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>>678601321

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>>678601013

If you dont eat your food somebody will try and take it

Your only hope is to pretend to be jewish and get a kosher meal

Your fucked if the biggest thing your worrying about is the food

It sucks but come on bro you got to eat.

how rekt are sex offenders inside? i mean, how are they even alive? do they get protection or something?

i wonder how many socially retarded /b/tards have ended up in prison for cp. not like they're able to post here and tell us about it. can you even imagine how fucked someone like that would be?
>>678601321
anyone in extreme pain in hosp has probably been given heroin. stop bitching, pleb.

>>678601148
"Friends " = butt buddies.

You can go to your aids support groups together

>>678601256
really all I hear is about how gangs run the prisons, chomos get beat and raped. how young was your minor? how long sentence?

4chan keeps falsely flagging my posts as CP ( I've gotten a bunch of bans reversed ).. I'm worried that cops will raid my shit, I won't have anything illegal, but someone will kill me in jail before I have the chance to prove it.

>>678600489
Shit talking mostly. This dude was an ex army ranger and I'd had enough of his shit and he told me that he'd beat the fuck out of me which by all means was probably true. I told him that I agreed that he most likely could but anytime I'd see him, whether it's in the hall, or at the dining facility I'd swing on him. That gets both parties sent to the SHU for at least a month. He was.. I wouldn't say shotcaller but he had influence around, and if he's getting thrown in max confinement all the time that fucks up his flow. So I was left alone after that. It all sounds kinda intense reading it.. maybe it was at the time too but I look back at how stupid it all was.

you're good, dude. if they didn't violate you already, then you're fine. they can't violate you after they let you leave the office.

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>>678599591
Chill out, loser.

>>678601148
What a retard.

On top of all the other retarded shit you have posted you want to make lifelong chums with criminals.

>>678601458
There's no such thing as not knowing when someone is a sex offender. You get your own block, and everyone can see which block you go to. But no, most people chose to make the best of their life's and act like adults.

>>678600834
>prison was actually great

yeah.
no.

>>678601556
ok you say "his shit" can you be more specific? again is he bumping into you? glaring at you? what kind of shit talking. pretend I'm a fucking sonic autismo here.

>>678599810
I'm fat, not muscle, just fat. I was 287 lbs when I went in. It was really just people trying to make me give them my food.

>sit down
>'you a big dude'
>been hearing this my whole life so I find it hard to even pretend to be offended
>'well I'm a big guy too, and I think I need your food more than you do'
>"fuck that bruh try taking my shit I'll feed you your teeth"

I got in with the blacks. I've grown up with them (Mississippi native) and they worked the kitchen (extra food).


I found it hard to tell too when they were bitching me down. If you feel like they are trying to insult or embarrass you, fuck them up.

>>678601214
Retard, you get ill from bread.

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>>678601468
>If you dont eat your food somebody will try and take it
well it's useless to me, no fucks given. maybe i can swap the stuff i can't eat, for vegetables/fruits.
i think imma just... try to avoid going down. or maybe only break the law in norway, where prisons are basically hotels. (pic. diet is said to be good too)

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>>678601683
>act like adults
that must have sucked for you guys

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Don't drop the soap.

>>678601760
that doesn't change the fact that you've got multiple dicks in your mouth

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>>678601712
Prison is a better time than jail. If your a shark and not a feeded fish

Better facility more time outside

Better medical care

>>678601629
Fuck you

>>678599810
>>678601752
Also if they physically touch you, fuck them up.

>>678601752
ok that seems really clear to me, I'd know someone is fucking with me at that point. or at least, I'd be like

>yeah what you want to trade for it

wold that be an ok response?

>>678601661
Straight-edge pretentious cunt faggot identified.

>>678601520
Don't get me wrong, it really depends on the place you go, but my minor was 13 and I was 18. Everyone knew, but like I said, you get your own block with other sex offenders for the programming, but you mingle with other blocks out at yard all the time. People know, but don't usually give you a hard time.

how are old/disabled people treated in prison? is there an element of respect that others don't get? or is everyone equally fucked?

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>>678601760
>death by pastry

brutal.

>>678588256
....Jesus you just can't help yourself can you? 4 violation when facing a Felony 5?! People like you should just be killed. You have no value to society.

>>678598106
thanks for sharing your gay sexual fantasy with us, underage anon

>>678601998
how about accidental bump in line, I don't want to swing , but I want to let em know it isnt ok.

>turn around
>stare em in the eye
>"watch it"

that ok?

I don't mind fighting I just have a hard time with non verbal cues sometimes. I'm pretty easy going.

>>678597598
i tend to agree but don't act like you are an addict, you were being fucking stupid and had so many chances to stop, heroine and meth are medical problems, this is you thinking you can get away with something when you couldn't

If you kill the first person that talks to you, it will be a much easier time.

>>678602255
Just say excuse me bro.

You are gonna get fucked up with that attitude

why the fuck people are sent down for using drugs, i do not know. instant loss of respect for the law.

>>678602133
yeah that is young enough where I'm at to be in prison for a long fucking time.

>>678601966
Haha bun hurt? Ruffled your pastry? Go eat a baguette you twat.

>>678602417
sorry - if THEY bumped me. If I bump someone, and I say "excuse me" does that make me a bitch?

>>678602255
it's just like the real world you fucking retard. you're going to be in jail a lot longer if you fight everyone for everything.

>>678602122
Wow. Scum in here tonight. Insulted for not associating with felons

>>678602603
Just because you're in jail doesn't mean you shouldn't have manners.

OP you belong on prison for violating probation 5 times. you are a fucking idiot. when you get out of prison, go to AA. the judge will send you to rehab AFTER you get out of jail. you need rehab clearly. if you fuck up after that, you will be doing 5 or 10.

>>678602499
Go eat a penis burger you stupid fuck boy

>>678601720
You know I couldn't even tell you specifically what. It's just that some people want to get under your skin. They enjoy it. If you're respectful of other people you should be fine for the most part. While awaiting transfer to the feds from county, I never had a problem there. The big differences are the food for starters. They feed you a lot better in prison than in county. The only time we had wet bologna sandwiches was when the pod/block gets locked down for fighting. As far as seating goes, you'll end up meeting a couple dudes who are cool to hang around. I'm not saying I recommend going but it's not exactly constant warfare either. Oh yeah.. keep your cell clean. If you want to be on bad terms with your celly that's a great way to do it

>>678602055
Commerce makes prison bearable. Fuck yeah trade that shit if you ain't gonna shovel that shit down your throat. I think keeping your strength up is more important than cigarettes or books but then again I was a fat motherfucker on the inside.

If they say "just give me that shit" just eat it. DO NOT throw that shit on the floor or away. I got "reduced rations" for 2 weeks because I some fucker wanted me to give him my food and I threw it on the ground and said "go get it" before we fought.

>>678597239
oh jesus, kid. youre fucked. get rid of the child molester haircut, keep your paperwork on you in case you get hit up, dont let anyone punk you out in front of others, don't be a goofass. stay off the poker table AT ALL COSTS, no matter how nice those guys seem. if youre gonna bet on cards, make it for state food or something. don't go to the "store", just wait for commissary day. don't accept free shit from people, it hardly ever is.

>>678602748
At least I could eat one without needing a gluten free bap you fucking cripple.

>>678602498
It's kinda like high school all over again, except you don't leave to go home every day. You just gotta find your group to chill with.

>>678596779
I mean if you already liked sucking dick and taking it up the ass what would you care anyways? You would be getting fucked like a champ and you could get the guy with the most drugs/commissary. If you were fucking the toughest dude there who would say shit to you? And if you were already gay why would you care?

>>678588256
I hope you're able to get treatment for all those drugs and shit. Good luck with that and this prison stuff man

>>678602989
is there a goth group? i fucking hate chads.

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>>678601973
nigger you are not hard. go back to stalking little kids faggot. don't worry you will go back to prison. hope you get sent to Angola.

what kind of stuff can you take in with you? books? a radio? clothes? food? smokes? money?

>>678602853
ok thanks, good to know

>>678602724
>>678602641
"just like the real world" I don't think so man. I've met a lot of criminals - guys who have done 10+ years, and they aren't fucking normal people. So that is why I'm asking. I'd rather get my ass kicked a few times than have every asshole making a run at me.

the day before you go down, eat as many super-hot chilies as you can physically consume. you won't be raped twice.

>>678603133
stop asking questions. you ask stupid questions.

>>678603071
The only one that wear make-up are the ones that want the D. There are quite a few of those too.

>>678603267
no.
what now fgt?

>>678602957
Amazing rebuttal, i liked how you mentioned your ability to eat a penis burger. But fuck off now you stupid cum dumpster.

>>678598106
lmao "gay for the stay" isn't a thing, faggot

>>678603365
I just banned you! Enjoy your ban, faggot.

>>678603258
You've met criminals, well, you're talking to one right now. I'm telling you, you don't have to be a bitch, but you don't have to be a douche either. Either one will get you shit on. Find some friends, and just hang out with them, and just chill.

>>678603445
k

>>678602948
>dont let anyone punk you out in front of others

can you give me a concrete example(s) of this please.

>>678602989
ok thanks

>>678602853
thanks interesting and good to know.

>>678602839
ok, good info. I'm generally respectful - I can deal with latinos ok, but I seriously can't deal with blacks. I have no fucking idea when they are JUSS PLAYIN LOL JUSTT PLAYIN , I act hard, they back off, and then they fucking punch me upside the head.

>>678603133
you are going to prison. you violated WAY too many times. you can't take anything. I mean nothing at all. after you get out the judge will send you to safe p or state rehab. do not fuck up in rehab or while on paper. you will get hard time for fucking up after that.

>>678603500
You'll be back.

>>678603009
well, ask your girlfriend that question. She already likes sucking dick and getting fucked, why not let some niggers run a train on her this weekend