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>>690377302
>be me
>be driving home from work
>see car smashed into wall
>completely blown to pieces
>pull over and turn on hazards
>run over to car
>get to the driver just as he's breathing his last
>911 shows up 45 seconds later
I still think about it sometimes. The way his eyes looked in the end.

>>690377378
I'm sorry anon.

>>690377490
Don't be.

>>690377566
I saw something like that when I was in Bangladesh. A kid had gotten run over by some shitbox car and his mom was holding him in her arms. I don't know if he lived or not

>be me, 16
>dating a girl for a little bit
>thingsareneato.jpg
Fast forward 6 months
>I have to move 400 miles away because of parental nonsense
>we do the distance thing
>It's actually working a bit
>on new year's day I hitchhike down to see her (we had talked about it prior)
>when I get there, she tells me she's been cheating on me
>alright.png
>ask friends in town if I can couch hop for a bit
>they're all flakes
>got to enjoy homelessness from my junior to senior year (I graduated on time)

It gets way, way worse. Cont?

>>690377705
That hurts man. It sucks feeling so helpless.

>>690377902
Go for it.

>>690377705
What were you doing in Bangladesh?

>>690378000
Peace Corps.

>>690377902
Nah. That's regular shitfeels I see here everyday.

/b/, I'm a useless fuckup who just fucked over his best chance at a good future.

>>690377970
Okay

>during homelessness (I'm 18 at the time, finishing up my senior year) I meet this girl
>she's really into me
>we start talking, she offers to help me during these tough times
>we end up dating
>sometimes she would sneak out and use her ID to get a motel for us for the night
>notevenbangingjustcuddles.gif
>eventually save up enough money for my own apartment
>we get engaged
>during that time, she gets pregnant (with my baby)
Fast forward 6 months
>behind my back, she breaks the lease with my landlord, fucking my credit
>Hey, Chaz, we're moving to Nebraska now
>imeaniguessso.png
>she makes me leave all my possessions so she can take things important to her
>I'm in love so I don't care
>Nebraska ended up being a flop, so we move back to where we were
>she gets to stay with her parents, but they still think I'm a bum
God guys.....I'm tearing up. Cont?

>>690378610
Well, anon, you can't blueball us now.

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>>690377302
Posted this yesterday. I hope it takes a feel or two out of you.

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>>690379367
Want more? I hope I'm helping.

>>690379367
Bummer m8. Try looking for her and reconnecting

>>690379641
7 years after? No way. Do you think she remembers me from time to time?
Also, I think I had a pic around. I'm searching.

>>690378735
Thanks for the chuckle, anon

Fast forward to April 2016
>on the 13th my daughter is born
>Icouldntbehappier.gif
>the day we take the baby home, she dumps me
>"My parents and I don't think you're good for the baby"
>I had two jobs while she recovered from her c-section, while living on the streets again
>she files for child support
>I can't afford it, considering the fact I'm saving for an apartment and keeping myself, and the baby alive as is.
>My parents offer me a place to stay
>My (now ex) tells me I'm a deadbeat who doesn't deserve his kid
>She files for full custody
>tfw in less than 3 months my house, possessions, and daughter were taken from me by the person who helped me build the empire from the ground up

My daughter's name is Juliana. I miss her so much....I live out of state, and I'm having no luck with a job. I moved because rent is cheap in Kansas. I don't know what happened...I just wanted a family. Now I have nothing. Thanks for the listen /b/ros. It's hard not to be an hero sometimes. I don't do it because my daughter deserves a father, but she's trying to keep her from me. I'm 19 years old and wanted to be there for my kid. What happened...?

I realized yesterday that I born to be alone and it hurts me so badly

>>690380006
>7 years after? No way
Yes way. I just reconnected with the girl I had a crush on in grade school, 15 years ago. If she held some form of positive affection for you and didn't think you were a fucking freak, then just saying "hey" won't hurt.

>>690380031
kidnap daughter.

>>690380031
Aw shit man i feel you. Hope things will get better and you get a job

>>690380640
Thanks, anon. Shit just kinda hits me in the feels. It's father's day...and I'm a father to a child I want to have contact with but can't because of some twat.
The lesson?
>wear a goddamn condom. Please.

>>690380797
Well, what pretext did she use to justify taking full custody? You could try looking and seeing if a paternity right's group will sponsor your case. They exist for that purpose after all.

>took too much ecstasy last night
>can't cum and I feel like wanking

how do I stop the feels I am currently feeling

>>690381238
You overdosed on x and your biggest worry is wanking?

>>690380031
Holy shit dude. You got some messed up shit for a 19 years old. You were pretty stupid keeping the baby though

>be me
>know girl for a couple of years, have been friends and have shown interest in each other even to this day
>she lives in florida
>has told me about all the sex she gets
>no longer feels the need to tell me ever since I told her I considered just not talking to her
>tells me recently she has a sugar daddy
>am really concerned knowing she smokes weed and gets drunk as well
>a bit depressed that she isn't the sweet innocent girl i knew

I'm just being a selfish prick complaining about it, but knowing she does all this hurts.

>>690380961
She said the fact I was homeless was evidence enough I was incapable of keeping her. It was her fault I was put in that position. I'm not now, but I was...I honestly just need a job and my baby will be mine again. It's hard landing a job in Kansas for whatever reason. I used to be a glass blower (inb4 blows dick for cash), and I made great money, but when she made us go to Nebraska, she made me leave all of my equipment. My kiln, my torch, my gas tanks....all of it.

>>690381391
But we had planned on having the baby. I was making thousands of dollars a week blowing glass. It was perfect.

>>690380497
She isn't on Twitter, no images in Google, no Facebook...
Anyways, I found her brother's Facebook and her mother's. Also, I remember which high school she attended to, so I've seen some photos of her back then. My heart is fucking racing, anon. I don't dare doing anything.

>>690381758
I feel you dude, but isn't 19 a tad early for planning to have children?

>>690381610
Listen to me. I don't want to sound like a fucking ambulance chaser, but you have a textbook example of why
>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fathers%27_rights_movement
is a thing. You can do a lot of things, including trying to contact her and seeing if you can prove your responsibility (this is important if you need to go to court), and looking into some father's rights groups who may be willing to take up your case. Seriously, fight it. The last thing you can do is give up if you want to see Juliana.

>be me
>no bro or sis
>be 13
>mother is pregnant
>act like I have no idea (i feeling happy and confused)
>got angry on her for some fucked up childish reason that i don't even remember
>go to my room
>start cryng
>told myself i hope she and her child die
>3 months later
>miscarry
>fast forward 5 years
>my best friend graduated from school
>we celebrate
>got really drunk
>i left them to meet with the girl i liked, wanted to join them later
>phone battery dies
>done with the girl
>start looking for my friends
>they left the place where we were drinking
>decided to go home cause no chance to find them and i felt really sleepy
>hangover and thurst wakes me up in cuple hours
>cheking facebook
>our mutual friend texts me they got in a car crash and she has no idea how bad it was
>rush to the street
>got taxi
>on the way to the hispital, i see his jeep
>looks like a squeezed can
>hospital, everyone is running around, no one answers me
>finally nurse starts speaking with me
>i said im drivers brother hoping someone will tell me what happened
>my best friend is in coma
>our mutual friend died on the spot
>2 other guys are in shock they just cry and speak some random shit
>behind them, two police mans speaking to each other
>see thats what happens when you get drunk
>threw the first thing that was on the table by my side into his face
>almost got arrested for attacking policeman
>nurse gave me some drugs to relax
>2 weeks later
>my friends brain died
>now im 21
>thinking about this all everynight
>hating myself for that sentence i whispered to myself
>hating myself for leaving my friend, everything could go differently.
>drinking everynight to the point there my brain just shuts down, even thinking about that im gonna have to stay alone with my thoughts burns me from the inside out
>feeling emptiness.

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>>690380031
Hey man, I know how it feels to be kept away from your brand new child. My ex-wife kicked me out when our son was 6 weeks old, I didn't see him for close to 3 months after that, and now, post-divorce, I only get him for an hour a week.

I lost my wife, my son, my home, my career, and everything that I wanted for my future over a 5 month period. It's tough not to just blow my brains out, but I promised to be a good dad, and I'm going to. It's hard as hell, but that little man keeps me going.

You can do it, man. Even when you miss her remember that she's there, and that she deserves to have a good dad, one that was willing to do what you did for his family, and you keep going, man.

>>690382056
In retrospect, fuck yeah dude.
>>690382073
Anon, thank you. Fucking thank you. /b/ is not always a fuckpool of dicks. Whatever you believe in, your karma is gonna repay you. Thank you.

>inb4 homeless
>inb4 on 4chan

>>690382303
I'm so sorry, anon. I really am. Nobody deserves this bullshit. Nobody. I hope things take an upwards spiral. You deserve it.

>>690382079
The fuck does your mom miscarrying have to do with that?

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>>690382424
Don't mention it. My dad went through a nasty divorce when I was 5 or 6, so I feel you on this. Don't give up, and you will see your daughter again. I promise you that much.
t. Lawyer

>>690382491
Cell phones are kind of important for maintaining contact with the world around you, especially jobs.

>>690382808
What's your son's name?

>>690382782
just coincidence.
but i can't explain

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>>690381992
>>690379641
Got it!!!! Damn, boy, let's see what happens.

>>690383007
I don't have one (yet). I WAS the son. In hindsight, I can see how much my mother's actions hurt my dad. God bless him, he never let it impact my childhood if I could help it.

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>>690382722
Thank you. I really do appreciate it. I'm working on getting my life back in order, it's just taking longer than I thought. Things are pretty shit right now, but I have good people supporting me, a great therapist, and I do my best to muster as much hope for the future as I can.

>>690380031
I wish I was more empathetic for you. But here's some sweet tunes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WTvGUjSjE0k&list=PLdEB84XjJciNtAuBRUrm0Qs-sfbl1UJvP&index=45

Do what makes you happy. If you can't be there for her, send her letters.

is 30 gabapentin plus 29 compazine enough to kill me? one is an anti-epileptic and the other one is an anti-psychotic prescribed for migraines that I only took once because it knocked me out so hard but I was semi-conscious but immobilized and scared me. should i add something else to the mix?

>>690383141
I'm sorry. That gives me hope though, seeing as how you know what's going on....maybe one day my Juliana Elizabeth will see it too.

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>>690383094
Go for it! And know that wherever you are I'm fucking rooting for you!

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>tfw 20 y/o and my only sexual encouter was a short kiss with a girl wearing a sign that said "Free hugs and kisses"
>tfw all my friends manage to get girls
>tfw when always the one that's left alone
I can't stand it anymore. I got in shape and tried to be outgoing and shit. Hell I even read "Models" , but there still is no female that would show only the slightest interest in me.
What is wrong with me /b/?

>>690383161
It takes time, but you'll get there. The universe provides.
>>690383241
Thanks for the music bruv

>>690383432
Post pic of self.

>>690383432
mate you are only 20, give it some time, you still have a long life ahead. Just make sure you are tidy, get out and socialize and just have a good outlook on life. You will find someone

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>>690383291
>maybe one day my Juliana Elizabeth will see it too.
I know she will. I'm not going to lie though, it's a hard road ahead if you have to fight in court. But I know how much a kid means...It's worth it, anon.

https://fathers4kids.com/fathers-rights

Also, look into paternity rights law groups in your state, they have deep pockets and may be willing to help out with costs if you can convince them.

Good luck no matter what you choose, and know that I'm with you in spirit /b/rother.

>>690383629
What he said. Being alone isn't so bad. Learn an instrument, or a trade. Occupy your time and surround yourself with like-minded people. Whoever it is will wander by as soon as you quit looking for them.

>>690383678
That really helps. It may sound fruity, but that means alot. Thank you for being human.

>>690380031
Eventually that little girl will grow up and ita your duty to make sure that she grows up knowing that her mother is a cunt and her father didn't abandon her, when she gets older I'm certain she will want to make a connection with you don't become an hero m8, that girl is carrying your genetic code

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>>690383945
Anything to help out a fellow /b/ro, especially when so much shit is piled on them. I'm serious, you deserve to see her. And as far as being human goes, all it takes is passing along a good deed to set things right. You'll win, man.

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>>690383514
Having a lot of time on my hands it's helped to watch some shows that give hope/guidance of sorts while still being entertaining.

>Daredevil
Pic related, happens early on and there's a lot of overcoming the odds in general. However, when the Punisher talks about his daughter in the graveyard in S2... fuck, I lost it.

>Frasier
Frasier's and Niles's divorces are major plot points in the show, and a fair amount of it focuses on them adjusting to divorced life. Helped me get some perspective while enjoying myself.

>Star Trek: The Next Generation
Yeah, it seems silly/weird/whatever but the whole show is about exploration, the future, and hope. It was frankly refreshing and typically put me in a good mood after watching since it's uplifting overall

>>690384199
Checked

You're right, it just sucks for the moment; not getting to hear her coo during the day, not being able to comfort her when she cries at night, not getting to feed her, or even being able to hold her for Christ's sake.

>>690383258
just don't kill yourself, travel, find something you like doing, find somebody who likes doing that with you. If you don't see any options in your current life, don't take the easy way out, just create yourself a new one.

>>690383783
I already play the trumpet and I do it in three different orchestras. I also do sports with other students in my hometown and with my friends on the weekends. I got out on every day on the weekend and sometimes also during the week. I have a job and a flat. Actually I think I kind of deserve someone.
Do you know what I mean? I mean it is unfair that I am still alone while guys that are much worse (I dont refer to my friends here - they are the only thing that makes my pathetic life worth living) take home the most beautiful girls.

>>690384524
I'll definitely check those out. Thanks for the recommendations.

Ironically enough, I used to kickbox as a freshman/sophomore, and that's a pretty valid metaphor.

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>>690377302
>You will never come home after a long day of working a job you hate, to see her standing there. She's wearing the necklace you gave her for her birthday last week. She smiles that smile which turns your hard facade to mush. She kisses your cheek, she's warm and she has the aroma of fresh baking. You look into those eyes, you could stare into them for hours. She blushes profusely as you tell her you love her. She whispers a reciprocation into your ear. Her face is even warmer now from blushing. She leads you to the sitting room. She pours out steaming hot chocolate for both of you. You sit for hours watching TV, but not really taking it in. You tell her you love her again, she giggles and kisses you on the nose, snuggling closer to you.
"I love you too".

>>690384634
First of all the whole 'i think i deserve someone' is a bad attitude to have. Its not like females pop up out of no where after you earn life achievements.

One thing i am curious about, do you put your foot forward and actually ask any girls out? whether its to dinner or movies or even just to hang?

>>690384634
That's the core of the issue: The entitlement. You aren't truly promised anything in this life. Not to be a douche canoe, but that mentality is toxic to yourself. Let loose, care less about chicks, care more about leading a happy life. It'll come. Don't wait on it. A watched pot never boils, anon.

>>690377378
Damn dude

>>690384904
Damn fuck. I think I'll just an hero, I'm too pussy to resist the pain of being alone.

>>690383432
you'll find her one day anon, she will be perfect

>>690384818
There are tons of sayings like it from tons of sources, that happened to be the most recent one. Like in Rocky: It's not about how hard you hit, it's about how hard you can get hit and keep going. (paraphrased, don't remember the exact quote) So yeah, it's totally appropriate.

Basically, you're gonna get hit. You're gonna get beat. Sometimes it's life that hitting you and beating you.

You only lose if you don't get back up and keep going.

Thanks for the help guys. I think I'm going to bed. Juliana's dad saying bye.


Goodnight,/b/ros. Happy Father's Day.

>>690385634
Happy Father's Day, Dad.

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i've been alone so long i've become numb to all emotion, all i want is to feel love but i can't cause there is no one to love. I am a ghost

>>690385634
happy fathers day /b/ro

>>690385011
Yeah I do it. Well, sometimes... I don't really like because no one has ever said yes.
I only had one date in my life - she is the most perfect girl and we are still friends. It clearly wouldnt work out. But that was definitely the best day in my life.

>>690385634
Good luck man. Happy Father's Day, and don't give up. I'm rooting for you.

how do you deal with your loneliness?

>>690385047
But I feel like caring less would be just the same as surrendering to the lonelyness

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>>690377302
>You will never slow your car down on a busy road at 6:24 in the evening on a lazy Saturday to help a girl whose car is smoking and seems to be broken down. You will never get out of your car, walking over to her in brisk but cautious strides to see if she needs your help. When she sees you approaching, you see a flicker of something in her eyes, you pass it off as disgust, you're used to that. She thanks you for noticing, cursing her mechanic, who said he would fix her engine, but instead went on holiday to a far flung location that you never bothered to remember. You're too mesmerized by her eyes, you wish you could tell her you love her right in that moment, but you know you can't. You will never help her to jump-start her car, and be given the sweetest half-smile in return. She stares at you, you're caught in her headlights, unable to speak nor move.
"Do you want to exchange numbers, in case my mechanic decides he'd rather be elsewhere?" She speaks softly. You feel your stomach churning, but somehow you speak.
"Sure."
>You say it quickly, but her face immediately cracks into a smile, her teeth bright against the lazy blue sky. You've never been so happy.

>>690386037
Care less about finding a girl, not existing. Find ways to occupy your mind. Take it off of worrying about pootytang

>>690385724
Yeah i know that rejection sucks, but it is really such a big part of life you have to get used to it. The thing is that if you never ask then you will never get a yes, then you will just be a in a never ending cycle of loneliness. And as i said before you are only 20 man, the right girl will cross your path, stressing about it now is counter productive to your life.

It is good to hear that you have asked some girls out though, just keep that up, stay confident and looking smart and you will eventually strike gold.

>>690381323
No, not being able wank after using xtc is very normal and happens to a lot of people.

>>690385673
>>690385710
>>690385806

You guys. You guys deserve good things. That really means something. Thank you. I can only imagine when Juliana can say it to me, smiling and looking at me with her crystal blue eyes. Thank you.

>>690386070
WAS THAT A REFERENCE

>>690378610
>save up enough money for my own apartment
how can a homeless person save up money

>>690385905
First of all can i ask if you are truly lonely in the first place /b/ro? What i mean by that is do you have friends whether they are close or not, are you apart of a social group, weather that be sports or a club or anything like that?

>>690386525
it adds up if you don't fucking blow it all away on stupid shit like booze and drugs

>>690386525
So, having a job while being homeless isn't a thing?
>gr8 b8 m8 r8 8/8

>>690386621
What he said.
When I was working before I had to go, I was a server making anywhere from $150-$300 a day in cash. Do the math, anon.

>>690386351
>>690386324
Thank you guys. I will try my very best.

>>690386482
>I can only imagine when Juliana can say it to me, smiling and looking at me with her crystal blue eyes.
Let that dream be your dream. And then make it a reality.

>>690383432
Hey anon, on the bright side you still have friends you can do fun shit with

>>690386482
Nah we don't mate, we are just helping a fellow anon out. Just keep positive, the universe will work out for you and your daughter.

>be me
>be 11
>youngest of 5
>first year of middle school
>performing art school
>ihavenotalent.jpg
>have to choose between choir, drama, band, and dance
>choose band
>have to select which instrument I want to play
>choose saxophone
>carelesswhisperallday.png
>learn that im not that bad at this music thing
>family makes fun of me endlessly because I am now a band kid
>feelsbadman
>go into highschool still playing sax
>im still a loser at this point, nobody I could really call a friend except for a long time friend
>good ol barry
>after a while I get my own sax and play for the band some more
>junior year rolls around
>meet a girl in spanish class
>her name is destiny, 6/10 name tbh
>kind of weird at first but shes alright by me
>get to know her some more, she doesnt have many friends
>shes a bit weird and childish but I am an incredibly patient person so I can deal
>school year goes on as normal
>starting to get tired of music, get really sick toward the end of the year
>tell no one
>summer comes around and eventually destiny and i start dating
>shit didnt work out, dumped 2 weeks later
>stay friends but apparently shes leaving to germany and im never going to see her again
>ohwell.jpg
>starting to feel really fucking sick at this point
>can barely leave bed
>good ol barry by my side daily
>pass the time playing video games and chatting
>senior year comes in
>audition for the jazz band
>get accepted
>ohfugnigguh.jpg
>really enjoy myself in the jazz band
>starting to feel a lot better about myself
>im not the best but its still so fun, life is great
>one day after school a new friend of mine tells me about this weird chick in his math class
>its destiny
>i was mad at first that she lied to me but decide its not worth getting worked up over
>try to talk to her
>mfw she acts like i killed her dog, makes it obvious she doesnt want to speak to me again

This is a long story, idk if its even worth a read. Cont?

>>690386921
Goddamn you're an inspirational /b/astard.

yes i've posted this before.
yes the name changes every time, to protect my friend and my own feelios
>be into guns, love them, great hobby
>best friend just isn't really into it but isn't anti gun
>one day he comes to me and says he wants me to take him shooting
>holy fuck, my best friend likes my favorite hobby? this is great!
>take him shooting a few times
>he loves it
>says he wants a shotgun for home defense since he lives in a shitty part of town
>help him pick one out
>we do clay shooting together for weeks and just love it
>one day wanna go out to some bars since weekend
>call him
>"hey bro, was gonna head to the bar, want me to pick you up?"
>doesn't answer
>figure his cell is dead, call house phone
>nothing
>totally unlike him but maybe he's showering or taking a shit
>go to his place
>knock on the door for like 5 mins
>not a goddamn thing
>worried as fuck, something must be wrong
>go get my key to his house from my truck (we were bros like that, it was for crashing and house sitting, that kinda deal)
>open door
>"tyler? you here buddy?"
>what the fuck he isn't answering
>shitshitshit
>walk in his bedroom
>he is laying on the bed with his brain and face now as wallpaper
>shotgun i helped him pick out has rolled on to the floor next to him
>no note
>run into his bathroom
>puke until its just stomach acid
>call cops, they do their thing
>his family calls someone to clean house
>someone else lives there
>even years later I still can't drive by it
i fucking miss you tyler. I really fucking do. I wish I could have helped you.

>>690387094
I get that a lot lel.

>>690386581
i have a few friends, 3 or 4, they are kind of close and i have a job but i only have 3 co-workers. But i meant the loneliness you get when you want someone to love but nobody is there and you are not even confident enough to make eye contact with anyone and choke up when you try to speak

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>>690377302
>You will never be browsing your local library, trying to remember why you still go there. You see a girl, her hair shielding her face from prying eyes, namely yours. She brushes her hair from her face, looking up. You see that she's reading 'A Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy'. You see her see you, and you wish you could shrink away. You know she will hate you. Who wouldn't. But she doesn't. A kind look, and a coercing smile flirt with her features. You can't mess this up. You sit down at her table, after grabbing whatever book you can find. You look up at her, smiling again. Without warning her hand darts across the table. She holds her hand out, wanting to shake hands, and you do. She tells you her name is Rachel, that she's studying at the same university you go too. You tell her your name, and you talk about classes. As you talk, you see her take out a bookmark, it's made of silk and has celtic-knots all over it. She drapes it onto the page she was on in her book, and slowly closes the book over it. You watch this all, the sheer beauty she displays in doing nothing.

Im fucked /b/ros, I have brain cancer, doc says the tumor is to large to remove currently, so chemotherapy will hopefully shrink the tumor so it can be removed, but the surgery has a 80% mortality rate. Im scared, I dont know how my family will cope with me being gone.

Im only 34. I want to be there for my sons man, I left them without a dad for too long whilst deployed. Im scared /b/

>>690387344
take your mind off it.
wanna talk military shit?
what branch, /b/ro? where'd you go?
POG mechanic shit here, desert storm.

>>690387236
Ok so we know a bit more about the issue, what age are you /b/ro? Whats your living situation like? What kind of job are you in? Does it deal with people other than your co-workers ona daily basis?

Can i ask why you lack the confidence to talk or look other people (i'm assuming the opposite gender is the biggest one here) in the eye?

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>>690386482
You deserve them too, bro. Just wait till she can hug you, you'll flip fucking shit.

I came into this thread expecting to be depressed, but I'm more hopeful than before after reading all this advice. Happy Father's Day, you wonderful /b/astards.

>>690387344
Your sons will understand. Cancer is a Dragon, after all, and hell is it hard to kill.

Just be honest with them. Spend as much time with them as possible.

Oh, and take out plenty of life insurance if you can. Even if you can't be there physically and emotionally, they'll at least appreciate that you're with them financially.

>>690387532
I'm 19 and i live at home with my parents and i have alright job, i install signs and most of the time its just me and my workmates, no real communication with other people.

I'm not sure where it comes from, i can talk to guys fine but when it comes to girls i find it really hard, when i goto parties girls will come up to me but im not confident enough to do anything most of the time i sit there and hope they go away but the other half of me hopes they stay

>>690387522
Marine. Iraq, just bog standard infantry, Fallujah. best and worst time of my life

>>690388255
shit man, fallujah? that must've been fucking insane.
closest i got to the shit was getting a M113 out of a sand bank with a wrecker.
if you're cool with sharing, I'd love any stories you have

>>690387792
Already made sure they'll be fine financially, I try to be there everyday after school to pick them up. I dont want to tell them why daddy cant be there for there graduation or when they get married, I didnt have a father growing up, I want them to have one

> be me
> 20 y/o
> questions all the time
> someone stole my apple juice

>>690388093
Oh ok so just out of school i am assume. Good to have a reliable job. Saving up that money for a flat of your own would be a good start, would help boost your confidence a bit and be a good step into the start of adulthood.

Parties are definitely a good way to get through the barrier of a lack of self confidence, though you seem to be struggling a bit which is fine, as i have said to a previous poster you are still a young buck with plenty of years up your sleeve.

So with these parties you say girls are coming up to you to talk though you are having trouble talking back to them, in these moments are you feeling shy or embarrassed? And is alcohol involved at all or are you not a big drinker? Do you have any interests that you think girls would find compelling or, for the lack of a better word, interesting?

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>May 4th
>Son is 8 months old
>His first Star Wars day
>Gotta make it special, even though he's too little to watch them yet
>Stop at toy store
>ifindyourlackofselectiondisturbing.mp3
>Wait a minute
>Found it
>Stuffed Chewbacca
>Nearly as big as he is
pic related
>Get to the house and Mommy asks what's in the bag
>Son's eyeballing that green bag like it's got the droids he's looking for
>Pull out the plush, tell him it's a new friend
>His name is Chewie
>He lights up like a lightsaber
>Hugs his new buddy
>Nonstop giggles
>Doesn't even put him in his mouth
>mylittlejedi.jpeg
>We build and knockdown blocks
>Peekaboo with Chewie
>Fly him around like an X-Wing
>Feel it flowing through us
>Look at Mommy
>Look at the clock
>Time's up
>Wookie hugs for my padowan
>Kiss him, breathe him in, try to take as much with me as I can
>Hand him to Mommy
>Look at her
>"I love you."
>sadsmile.exe
>"I know."
>Door shuts behind me
>Sit on the steps leading to my old home
>Weep

May the force be with you, son. Always.

>>690388695
how old would he be now?
if (or once) he's >14 you could try to contact him and get a meet set up or something.

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>>690377302
>You will never be walking through the Louvre, wishing it was quieter, and that all of these tourists would leave. You're on an exchange program, your university with a Parisian one. You wish you could feel what the great artists felt, that sheer love, hatred, anguish, joy....
>Then you see her. She's staring intently at a piece by Monet. Her brow furrows. She doesn't understand. Like a force of magnetism you feel yourself drawn to her. She doesn't notice your presence, and you feel comfortable in that. The painting is of a Garden facing the sea, with patrons standing in view. She's looking at you now. You continue to stare at the painting. Your french isn't good, you can't communicate with her without making a fool of yourself.
"He was a visionary"
>She pronounces her 'r' in the back of her throat. You choke, not expecting her to know you were an anglophone.
"He was never afraid to show what he felt he saw. He must have seen the beauty in everything"
>She speaks quickly,fluently. You wish you could speak back to her in French.
"Are you going to talk, or is my English that bad?"
>'That' becomes 'zat'.
"I don't know how to respond. I'm more of an abstract lover myself".
>Whydidyousaythatwhydidyousaythatwhydidyousaythat
>She laughs, it's sweet, a tinkling sound.
"My name is Marie, it's a great pleasure to meet you!"
>She smiles, you fall apart inside.

>>690388674
I'm pretty sure im feeling shy and embarrassed, idk what about i couldn't tell you, most of the time im high maybe a little bit of alcohol, and no i have no real interests apart from going on 4chan and doing drugs. The only time i can speak to girls confidently is when im off my face on MDMA but most of the time i dont even know what im saying

>>690381556
She's going to crash and burn. Stay in touch with her, but don't let her bring you down.

>>690381556
It's the harsh reality man, a lot of girls are like this despite what we thought they were like or what we want them to be

Learnt this the hard way recently too. Girls are fucked up, I know it's easier said than done but try to limit your love and feelings for them unless you're sure you've found someone you really want to be with

>>690388877
This was this last May, he's still an infant. I see him weekly, it's just not enough and I miss him more than anything.

>>690387078
Same story with me and this other girl i knew in highschool, continue

>>690381238
Remember it'll go away, comedown can be evil but it fades; just smoke some kush and relax

Quick personal story
>Be me 8
> Have Nan who i always saw every wednesday
> Sweetest Woman on earth. Always made me tons of food and bought my shit
>2 Years of this is great
>Parents split at 10. Dad moves into Nans house
>My Twin and Nan get in argument on a wednesday. He goes home leaving my Dad and Me
>Dad starts crying wondering what he has done wrong
>He's a solid good father
>Skip 6 Months
>We're all chill. Me, Bro , Dad and Nan
> 2 weeks before birthday
> Hands me WWF Game
>"THANK YOU!"
> Play that shit at my Mums house
>"Its not your birthday yet!"
>Nan tells me to just get up early and play it I do
>Skip 3 Years
>Turn 13 and I get a Den in basement
>Full of cool shit
>Dad and step mum come down
>"Anon, your Nan has passed away."
>Didnt shed a tear. Just died inside
>Skip 2 Months
>Sitting front row of church
>Dad makes a speech
>"Any other speakers?"
>Nerves take hold. I dont speak
>Flying without wings plays as my Nans casket goes to the crematorium
>At the mass brother says "Anon, Why was I ever mad at Nan?"
>Wells up and cries
I still cry today.
She passed away at 65 due to iron defficiency caused by alcoholism which I never knew about until she passed away. I regret never helping her through that...

>>690388468
Sure ill share some
Just be patient ill have to write them

>>690388948
Ahh drugs haha, you are talking to an anon with similar traits.

First of all the next time you know that you will be socializing with any girls in any amount i want you to avoid smoking any pot during and at least a few hours before hand. Honestly i think that this will help you. I have gone through the same stuff around the age of 23-24 where i felt similar around girls that didn't smoke, being sober around them first greatly built up my confidence with them and removed any paranoia that i had about them judging my character.

About your interests, have you ever thought about expanding them or maybe even thinking about, say, picking up a hobby? You say you have a few mates so maybe you could check out some of the stuff they might be in to.

Also something i am curios about, as it happened to me at a point in my life. Are drugs ruling the social life that you are having? Like does it make the social events you are involved in?

To be honest anon, so far you seem like a decent guy, nothing bad. If you can find a way to get through this confidence issue i believe you will find yourself someone.

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Good night /b/ros. Thank you for being my friends when no one else would.

>>690389638
Goodnight /b/ro, hope you have a chipper day tomorrow!

>>690389759
Same to you.

>>690389636
I would love to have a hobby but i have no time for one right now, i start work at 5am and get off at 4pm and after that i cant be fucked doing anything.

And yeah i need to be under the influence of drugs at any party i goto, i haven't been sober at a party since i was like 15

>>690385694
I love you, Anon. Try and find good things in the world. Doesn't have to be another person. Start small by listing the things you like in the room you're in right now. Do that until you can list the things you love. That's how I dragged myself out of the hole you're in. Good luck /b/ro, you're gonna be okay.

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>>690377302
>Be me
>Living in shitskin country
>Men always accompany women and girls of rich,"decent" families
>My female cousins randomly decide to go shopping
>Me and other male cousin go with them
>All of them are older than us
>youngest is 16
>Oldest 22
>I was an awkward 15 year old
>The other was an annoying 12 year old
>Go with them
>Shitisgoingbetterthenexpected.webm
>stop at a petrol pump
>Cars everywhere
>Call a rickshaw/tuk tuk
>Female cousins sit in the back
>Me and cousin have to sit with the driver and hang with one foot out
>I am ready to go but other cousin bitches out
>I have to take him back home
>I ask the eldest girl
>She says that I have to go with him
>I knew I was to be labeled a cuck
>reluctantly go with him
>Wait for cousins outside home so it seems I was with them
>Make plan to fool everyone
>Cousins snitch
>Labeled a cuck for eternity
>Still don't talk much to cousins
>4 years and I haven't forgotten
>Turns out they think I am depressed
>Have no idea what it's all about
>Mfw when I am depressed about something nobody remembers

>>690388468
>pinned by mortar fire
>we couldnt move
>so we called in support
>we had to wait 4 hours
>being bored marines we started fucking with each other
>we all smoked
>we all fucking hatred for iraqi cigarettes
>see young marine sitting in corner
>plot to fuck his day up
>i manage to get 5 other guys in on this
>the one thing we looked forward to was a cigarette
>have a carton of iraqi cigs
>we divided them between us
>walk up to marine offer him cigarette
>"sure"
>make sure he takes iraqi cigarette
>lights up
>"what the fuck man, what the fuck do you even smoke"
>show him carton as he throws away cig
>"those aint fucking Marlboros anon"
>offer him another this time a malboro
>he is content
>Fellow marine does the same
>we carried this on to the point that he gave up smoking and formed a hatred towards us
>He got shot 3 months before we went home
>comes out of medic tent
>offer him a cig
>he hesitates but takes it
>lights up
>"FUCK YOU ANON, WHY"

>joke with your friend whilst both young and impressionable
>"seatbelts are for pussies, I don't wear that shit"
>friend dies in a drunk driving crash as a passenger
>thrown from vehicle because no seatbelt
>dies instantly
>never drink and drive, but still don't wear seatbelt cause that shit's for pussies

>>690390479
Thanks anon, i appreciate your help. Best of luck to you

>>690388695

Happy father's day champ

>>690390224
Yeah i know the feeling of having to be under the influence, i started in my young teens as well and i do think that does contribute to these issues. The thing is you don't have to be under the influence, no matter how you feel in the hours heading up to the party. I will be honest in the fact that it is hard changing this habit but it will be beneficial for you. And i don't mean that you have to cut out drugs all together, hell taking drugs is fun as shit, just give it a go a few times and i promise you will find it goes a long way to changing your experience.

So you work fairly long hours which is a killer. Though i assume you do get time off each week? Have you maybe thought about a mixed sport? I got myself involved in the odd mixed sport over the years and found it to be a major confidence booster, working as a team with others.

Have you had any past relationships at all? No matter how short they may have been?

>>690390635
fucking kek that is the best thing i've ever heard.
here's one to reciprocate
>be innamotorpool
>have dump trucks, bed stored up for rain draining
>this is the age of the 5 ton so shit still has to come in for servicing
>private asshole hops in the rig
>forgets to drop dump bed
>drives straight the fuck into the building
>fucks the PTO and hydraulic system on the rig
>destroys the garage door mech and bends the bay doors
>have to wait like 3 weeks for new parts to be shithook'd in
>make him do watch every night
>do acetylene solo cup bombs every night to fuck with him
>he earns nickname tonka
the kicker?
"LOWER DUMP BED BEFORE DRIVING" is fucking painted on the dash

>>690389638
Goodnight man, I wish you the best for her.

right now I'm just, trying to get better
and I feel so selfish.
I was unattractive and socially awkward, but I fixed that.
But I cant stop thinking how shallow I've become, how petty and little of a man I have to be just to like myself. Im a very social person, I have a job that I like, I'm attractive enough but I hate the feeling of this all. it feels cheap. I feel cheap. I feel like I'm fighting myself the whole way through.

>>690385694
It is easy to feel invisible in this world with life passing by so quickly. Just know that no matter how you feel right now you are loved and that you will be loved in the future.

We all have our moments of loneliness anon but, as stupid and overused this saying might seem, there actually is plenty of fish in the sea. You will find that person that your soul is looking for, just give it some time and be proactive, it will happen for you.

>>690380031
Goddamn, manipulative fucking bitch. Your child will have a bad future with her, you should save Juliana. Make it your life purpose, you won't get bored.

>>690391213
How do you mean you have become shallow? In what way do you feel that this has happened? It sounds like you have improved yourself which does not correspond with being little of a man.

Life is a fight, i think as we get older that becomes easier to understand, but if it wasn't a fight i think it would become boring and complacency would become too common. The human race strives to improve itself, it is in our DNA

>>690383432
> what's wrong with me

You're asking 4chan for dating advice.

>>690387078
>a bit crushed but what can i do at this point
>make my way through senior year, health is pretty shit but i feel alright regardless
>jazz band is rockin, the only thing i put effort into
>barry spent his birthday at my side while i was puking out my guts
>tell him to leave me be so that he can enjoy his birthday
>he says hes alright not doing anything
>this frustrates me so i continue to tell him to leave
>eventually get him to leave, not gonna lie i was being a dick
>days pass
>no sign of barry
>wtfisthis
>learn through his sisters facebook that he died in a car accident on the way home from my house that day
>mfw i killed my best friend
>leaves me bedridden and apathetic
>eventually learn i have to live with the pain of loss and try to continue a normal life
>time passes and i start getting back into the groove of things
>second semester is halfway over
>jazz band made me want to pursue music as a career
>set a course for studying music theory and conducting
>one day destiny comes to me afterschool and tells me that shes sorry for being mean
>apparently shes a foster kid now
>apparently thats her reason for ignoring me all this time
>she tells me that i was too important to her to drag me in to her personal problems
>i dont know how to react to this
>small convo ensues before i have to go
>leave feeling pretty alright
>check my phone when i get home
>i didnt realize until then that it was april fools day...
>wowreally.jpg
>never see her again
>go throughout the rest of the year constantly hoping for a better tomorrow
>graduate, feels good
>applying for jobs and making appointments for college placement tests
>house is broken into while im out taking english placement test
>get home
>no more video games or consoles
>dont really care about that right now
>rush to the closet to check on my saxophone
>my fucking saxophone was stolen...
>i have no money to buy a new one
>was going to save up and sell my current sax to buy a better one
>now what
Cont.

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This may be something small but i just want some support.
>be me
>be 16
>have 3 nephews. Oldest one is 5. Middle one is 3. Youngest one is 2.
>Have their mother love a deadbeat dickhead who abuses her and her sons more than her own children.
>does nothing about the abuse they go through
>oldest one gets abused the most because he isn't his real son.
>Have him show up one day with a handmark on his cheek.
>My mom takes a picture.
>doesnt call CPS
>don't know why.
>My nephews mother eventually leaves dickhead. For 5 minutes. Literally.
>She only came over to invite her friends. Goes back to house. Gets back together.
>Get told by my mother when i got mad at my oldest nephew that he got yelled at by dickhead so bad that he was shaking and crying.
>get angry at dickhead.
>literally can't do anything to dickhead because he doesn't give them handmarks anymore and if we try to confront him we won't see them again.
>tfw I can't do anything to save my nephews.
Sorry /b/ this may seem light. But it hurts.

>>690390992
I've never even kissed a girl before, i used to play sports but i quit when i got this job and yeah i et the weekends off but sometimes they call me in on weekends.

>>690392070
So this is happening currently? The picture your mother took, does that still exist?

>>690390546
Happened to me /b/ro .I fucked myself over nothing too. Greentext?

I'm so tired /b/ros. You know when you just feel tired and too heavy to move? It's killing me because I feel intense guilt when I lie around doing nothing and wasting my time (exmilitary) but I can't bring myself to get up and just get shit done I don't understand how I grew so weak.

>>690392070

your sister is a dumb whore. she deserves everything bad coming at her. hopefully they all get killed by that dude.

and UNDERAGE BAN!!

MODS MODS MODS!!!

>>690392070
So fucking call CPS? Have a crew jump his ass and beat him within an inch of his life?

Wtf if that nigger is hitting kids, he needs to check himself.

>>690392324
Sadly no. I forget what happened to the phone.
Even if it still existed it would still be to late to turn it in to CPS. My mom is being stupid and talking about how if we take it now we could be in trouble for not taking it in earlier or some shit.

>>690381556
I feel you anon, one of my best friends that I know was and still is the sweetest and most gentle hearted person I know. She's doing real big hoe stuff and drugs and alcohol and if she continues like this it isn't going to be pretty. Idk what to do, it's her life choices ain't it?

>>690378610
Is your name chaz?

>>690392524
Can't. Again. We wouldn't be able to see the kids again. He has that much influence over my sister.

>>690392473
Agree with my sister being a dumb whore at this point. Slept with 2 guys so close together. Sorry about being underage i guess.

>>690391073
Holy shit that hilarious
>Be doing weapon sweeps
>had just come out of tussle with a dug in rpk
>decide to fuck around
>rpk has fucking crates of ammo next to it
>ohdisgonbegood
>load up rpk
>we all start talking with Russian accents
>"This here is fine Russian weaponry"
>fire off a few rounds
>full auto goodness
>young private wants ago
>struggles to lift it
>tries to be like rambo and shoot from the hip
>but alas he is to weak to wield such fine Russian engineering
>fires
>gets blown back by recoil
>still holding trigger
>aimed at Humvee
>officers were pissed
>gets the blame for all rounds shot
>He fucking got watch for at least 7 months
Best part was I blew the holes in the Humvee

>>690392289
Having not been with a girl at your age isn't a major, even though media and society in general tend to make everyone feel otherwise so don't feel bad at all about any of that.

It sounds like you have an epic work ethic which is great /b/ro. Though work and a good work ethic is important in life it is not everything. I know through personal experience how work can easily take over your life and essentially become the reason to live which is not true at all. You have to make sure that you leave time to enjoy yourself, and that doesn't just mean drug benders either. I think that if you feel that you don't have time to commit to a sport that maybe you could find something else. Maybe even say joining a community on the internet that interests you.

>>690391932
its been a few months since then. I still think about it every night. Being lied to and made fun of by someone i once cared for deeply, sending my best friend off to his death when all he wanted to do was be at my side in my time of need. I dont know what Im going to do with my life anymore, I cant afford a saxophone so I might just end up studying something else like advertising or something stupid like that. I know I have it better off than others, I have a roof over my head, a place to sleep, food to eat and a good decade or two if im lucky to live it up. Even so, this never ceases to eat away at my consciousness every time I attempt to go to bed at night. I dont even know if the read was worth the time but I just wanted to finally get a chance to share my story, even if nobody is listening.

>>690392353
When did this feeling start roughly? Was it closely after you left the service.

>>690392532
First the whole 'we will get into trouble for not going to them earlier' is bullshit. And i know that you are afraid that you may not see them again but you have to understand that whats best for them may mean that exact thing.

>>690392778
Forgot to add we called him yuri for the rest of deployment

>>690393045
Felt it in my teens, probably started around 13/14ish. It stopped when I was 17 then I joined up, felt good for the majority of my service then it came back I'd say around 1 month after coming back.

>>690392070
couldn't he just have an "unfortunate accident"?
>>690392778
god fucking dammit i'm gonna wake up the house from laughing
that is some generation kill shit

>>690392888
4chan is the only place i really come consistently,its the only thing i really do during the week other than work. The only thing that keeps me sane during the week is my imagination. Most nights i imagine meeting a beautiful girl who i fall in love with and then when i stop i snap back into reality, it hurts but it feels so good at the same time

>>690393348
So quite a while then. Have you been to a doctor at all? Sometimes it can be your body purely lacking something that it needs more of. Being in the military could of helped off set this by putting you in a different frame of mind.

If not medical then maybe what would be best is getting involved in an extra curricular activity, especially something team based to help keep motivation up.

>drunk
>listening to $uicideboy$ - runnin; thru the 7th
>reading these
bad combination, but the feels man.. the feels

>>690393681
Nah I haven't, I'll give it a shot. Team based activity sounds good, that's what I miss most about serving. Hey thankyou for the help man, I really appreciate it. You've given me some ways to start fixing my shit up and I'm beyond grateful for that.

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>>690393875
>>690393899
>>690393923
>>690393959
All of those are me. I have over 300 feel pics, if this someone in this thread will make me cry - i will post them all.

>>690384904
This
Is
Feels

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>>690393625
Yeah 4chan can be somewhat addictive for reasons i still have yet to figure out, been on and off this site for 7-8 odd years now, though as a community i have found it doesn't really fulfill that need.

Having a good imagination can be great, being able to escape for awhile and exercise the mind can be healthy but being there all the time can become harmful, especially when it comes to imagining life with a girl that, to be honest, is probably to good to be true. Flaws tend not to be involved in our imaginations, just make sure that you keep that in mind and not let it take over your thought process in reality.

Though, speaking of imagination, it is a good place to help work through conversations and scenarios that you could then try with girls at parties and what not.

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>>690394174
>>690394174

>>690394090
Don't thank me man, just happy to lend some advice. You sound like a top bloke. Good luck man.

Also thanks for serving, your probably american which i am not but all the same it is appreciated what you do.

>>690394111
Why do you want to cry today Anon?

>>690394367
>>690384904
>>690386070
>>690388906
I'm sorry anon

>>690379641
dont give up mate, i was in a similar situation, and we met again after 12 years and we still remembered each other, dont give up mate

>>690394436
Aussie actually. Hope you have a good day/night wherever you are and good luck with life /b/ro.

>>690394700
Oh haha, NZ, across the ditch. Will do mate, cheers.

>>690394629
I write these to feel something man. When will it stop working, I don't know. But then, that's it for me.

Hey at first english isnt my native language so my english might suck a bit...

>Be me 8 or 9 yo My mom tells me she has water in her legs
>Im a bit worried because of the way she told me
>Then a few month later she goes regulary to the doctor
>the doctor is a greedy as and did something that harmed my mother
idontrememberwhatitwas.png
>She switched the doctor
>doctor says its a big heart issue
>She goes to the hospital for a few weeks
>My grandmother takes care of me
>im worried as fuck
>she comes back i live 3 month with her
>then the oneday my cousin is by me
>we go out play a bit i call her and she says
>"you can stay out for another half our then is dinner ready"
>Were back i knock on the door
>i hear a male voice
>does she have a new bf?!?!
>A guy from the ambulance opens the door
>i just heard the beepsfrom the heart beat counter
>me and my cousin was guided to my room
>father told me i have to be strong
>rlyniggahmymomsabouttodie.wpk
>I get big depressions
>she comes back now she have a fake heart
>she also buyed a dog to move more
>i had to go out with the dog a few times
>then the one day i was about 11 or 12 yo
>she told me to go out with the dogs
>i watch youtube videos and refuse
>then she told me again but ...
>when she was about to say that she colabses infront of my eyes
>i call ambulance immediatley
>and that was the moment when i completley went insane
>also every time since i was 10 and i saw a ambulance drive to the direction of my house i paniced and run to my house
>mom is nearly permanent in hospital and i dont know if she dies or not
>my school wants to suspend me because i interrupt the lessons fight with studens ect.pp
>me insane gave me an extremeley reputatiuon boost and new friends
>13 yo i had crippling depressions i wanted to die every time i was alone
>i also lost myself in video games and youtube
>i wanted to go to the garden of my grandparents to relax and get rid of my suicide thoughts

>>690394240
Most of the time i imagine a girl with flaws, i dont need perfection in my life, i can find perfection in imperfection. I just have to be patient and hope i meet a girl soon, i've been waiting for years but i still have a little bit of hope left

>>690378049
Poop corps?

>>690392996
get a job, buy a new sax. keep on pushing man

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>>690394469
I haven't felt anything for too long. it's like my feelings have gone away due to some chemical imbalance in my brain that was caused from certain events in my life.
I'm constantly torn between holding on to the little humanity i may have in me , and this comfortable numbness which i accepted as an excuse for life.
I don't feel like i'm one of "them". i don't feel like i belong. i don't feel, anything. at all.
A lot of events in my life probably caused this emotional suicide, but i don't think this is how a human being is supposed to be. i...don't know nothing but blurry facts about what is supposed to be my life.

>>690395000
That'ts the stuff man. You will meet her, and to be honest you will probably meet a few people before her and go through the cycle of happiness and heartbreak a few times before you get to her. Just remember you have so many years ahead of you. Life isn't about rushing. Just make sure you take care of yourself and the universe will come to help you out.

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>be 19
>crush reciprocates my interest
>literally the best relationship ever
>at 5 months in she tells me that she sees herself with me forever
>after valentines day she avoids me and lies to me
>I have no idea what happened
>she breaks up with me/ friendzones me a month later
>then she starts abusing my trust and lies more
>last night I told her I'm done
I spent so much time, effort and money, not to mention love, that it literally crushes my soul

Looking for better fish now

>>690395259
this sounds similar to my position. I can't feel anything. I have 0 emotion. I wish i knew why i felt like this and how to fix it but idk

>>690392996
His death wasnt truly you're fault friend, you had no part in his undoing, his last thoughts were probably of you trying to make sure he had a good time. With the girl, fuck that shit man, get a rebound, believe me that'll fix things. As with all your stolen stuff, its just property, even your sax, get that job, regain everything over time.

>>690395548
take any meds?

>>690395444
>>r9k

>>690395321
as long as i will be able to feel happy again thats enough motivation to keep living, cause i know for a fact the only thing that will make me happy is a girl in my life

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>>690395548
What do you do in life, anon? with your spare time, your job, what ever that is ? Do you have someone ? does someone around you, understand you?

>>690395259
Ok anon, i hear you.

First thing, are you taking any kind of medication? Not at all saying that you should, just curious.

You talk about not feeling like you belong, i assume here you mean society? The 'normal's' as i have heard said before. Why do you feel this way, is there something in particular, like maybe the way you believe you think or act that contributes to this?

It sounds like you may have been through a lot of things that have taken there toll in one way or another, the fact that you are here posting though shows that you have a strength in you which is important though, it shows a great character.

What about your life do you believe you have trouble understanding?

>>690395741
You will man, trust me. Keep your head up and keep on living, be positive and you will be find what you are looking for.

You do sound like a good person, a positive member of society.

Life will be good for you Anon.

Also stay safe with the drug use. It would be a terrible thing for a person who has great potential to slip and ruin it through excessive drug use or by taking the wrong thing like methamphetamine.

>>690377378
Not trying to be rude, but why do you suddenly awknowledge the miserableness and cruelty in this world when you see it with your own eyes? How does it change? That shit happens every minute all over the world, there is no real reason to get upset over it. Have I been raised to be a sociopath or do I actually think that negative emotions are a waste of time and completely unavoidable?

>no you stay here your grandfather is not feeling up to it right now
>i wanted to go there so badly
>she refused
>that was the moment when my limit was reached
>i punched mys self drink 3 liters of water without stop
>vomit and drink more
>then ive done the smartest thing in my whole life
>i called my individual cases helper and told him
>"if you dont help me immediatley i will jump of my house"
>10 minutes later the police run into my appartment and take me into a psychiatry
>i was there when i was 8 and it was a nightmare
>so i wanted to get out
>1 week later i was out of this horrific place
and my mood was better
>a few months later mother and me are by my grandparents garden
>my mother and myself argued about some shit then i my mother began to shout on my
>i told my mother to calm down because of her heart
>she didnt stoped
>i scremed "please stop calm down your heart i beg you please stop"
>then she throws things on me i was to go out
>then gramps came out of the door and grabed me
>he was about to punch me in the face with all force
>i was trembling in fear then he "throwed" me agains the wall and goes to mother
>i go on the field
>mental breakdown
>I repeat "i killed my mother" for an half our
>then i saw the field was about to get harvested
>i thought what if i lay down between the corn maybe he would drive over me and i will die
>i didnt done that
>the psychatric thing wasin the end this "i killed my mother" thing was before
>then after the psychatric i called my mother judas because she knew i never wanted to go there again
>she was able to became a new heart
>we both where happy
>she got transplanted the new heart
>and i was so happy
>but in the operation she got infected by something
>my grandparents visited her every day but i didnt had the guts to visit her
>then i came from the scool
>a friend of my father wich i know since i was a baby invited me to a icecream
>i was so happy this day until my grandpa called me

>he told me to go to him asap
>i run to my house then i saw him cry
>he said "its about your mother..."
>i heard something break inside i cried so hard
>and he didnt answered me so i can understand so i called all the guys i know and told them she was dead
>then he told me something different i was happy she didnt died and i wasso confused
>next day we go to the hospital and i saw my mother
>yellow infalted with bruises all over her body and the doctor said " we have to turn out the machines its to late"
>i refused there must be a way to cure her
>he said "its to late shes braindead
>i was shocked about the fact my grandpa and my gandma agreed
>so i say the corpse of my mother
>i regret every word i said to my mother
> at the 02.15.2014 at 1:34 pm i lost the most important person in my life in the age of 14 years

so that was my story i cry right now because i repeated that ... thanks for reading

I'm alone, Noone cares anymore about me, never been in love, no one could possibly love me, I'm so depressed, every morning I wake up wondering why Had I woke up, I don't want to live a meaningless life, no skills, no hobbies, no friends, not a family that loves me.. I'm just alone, passing my nights browsing 4chan where I can find my only friends. What keeps me alive is my dog, the only one which is everytime with me, loving me, playing with me. I can say I live only for my little bastard, is the only one who keep waking me up in the morning, loving me unconditionally, playing with me and helping me but I can't stand this anymore.. I'm like an empty shell and I'm slowly dying. Fuck this life, why I'm still here?

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>>690395837
First of all i appreciate the fact that you took the time to talk to me , specially in such a smart and educated way. well done anon, thank you very much.
Second, I do take some concentration medication but that's not relevant because that aspect has entered my life in a much later stage than when this whole thing began.
I'm an ex army man, and i have been through some things in my life a "Kid" my age did not have to go through. With all that said and done, i regret nothing even though it cost me heavily, in many areas of my life.
I was always the standout. weather if it's at school, i didn't pay attention for a minute yet i still got good grades, or weather it's in other areas of my life which i always shown a higher perspective towards life, and a much more unique way of thought. i always knew i'm not one of , "Them". And by them, i mean the people around me. i never cared about small and minor things like people today do, like instgram likes or facebook posts. i always cared about helping others and saving lifes, even though that life approach always seemed to hurt me more than help me.
Yet, i never cared. i never changed that part of me. to this day i have scars on my body which are caused by being a human shield for people who couldn't shield themselves, and for some reason, i believe , unlike anyone else around me that it was the right thing to do .
You know, it's amazing how i feel so emotionless yet so responsible for those who are around. doesn't matter if they're friends, family, or just everyday people on everyday life.
I have an iq of around 142~147, and i was always a quick learner. my verbal intelligence is even higher at my native language and i talk to high ranking officers and politicians like i'm their equal, yet i never found someone i can talk to like myself and feel a true emotional connection, other than my ex fiance`.
I don't know, it's just there are so many things to consider here... i'm getting lost in my own nothingness.

>>690397084
How old are you , anon?
And Why don't you fix your life around , my friend?

>>690397053
I am sorry about your loss anon, the most important thing you can do now is make sure you live your life to the full and make your mother proud.

Also no matter how much it may hurt from time to time to never let go of the memories you have of her.

Our mothers will always love us and will always want the best for us, no matter where they may be.

>>690397394
21, I don't know how to fix it. I'm going to take a degree that I didn't want cause of my parents that obliged me, I've never been good at making friends cause people think I'm strange Avenue if I'm not this bad looking. I've never had a gf cause after my mother cheated on my father I'm afraid that every girl is a potential bitch. I just wanted to join the army, go on some mission and die doing something useful but my parents obliged me to stay. It's like I'm in prison

>born into Jehovah's witness family
>Raised to believe everyone and everything I know will be destroyed in Armageddon
>Be 5
>Mom tries to an hero because she thinks she'll get into paradise faster
>See whole thing but can't comprehend
>Dad becomes a drunk
>Drinks and shit kicks me all the time
>Family treats me like redheaded stepchild, get hand me down clothes, forced to get job, sister gets toys and new expensive whatever she wants
>No friends allowed, only Jesus
>Be 8, realize there's no god
>Tell parents, they tell me to god or gtfo
>No choice but to fake interest in God
>Grow up not being allowed to have friends, only allowed outside for 1 hour a day, no TV, restricted interests, only jesus
>Get picked on shit tons for not having friends
>Get into lots of fights
>Be 15
>After fighting school kids for years start fighting off dad
>Never win, harsher beatings,tries to gouge out my eyes at one point
>Finally achieve gf, date for few months
>Only guy I've ever been friends with fucks gf
>thought something was up because they always text each other and she became distant
>Find out on bus ride home from school
>Mad autistic rage, punch out city bus window, go to friends house, pull him out of his house and shit kick him while his mom screams and calls the cops
>be 16
>finally Taller than dad, work out in my room all day everyday
>He comes after me
>NeverAgain.jpg
>Absolutely shit kick him
>Pretty much destroy the whole house in our battle
>Drunkenly screams "GTFO ANON"
>leave happily and go live with friend who fucked my gf
>He has super hot rich gf
>She wants my dick
>Start fucking her and move in with her
>Fall insanely in love
>Her dad has always wanted a son, treats me like family
>Freedom, go outside a lot, make friends, they buy me all new clothes and take me on vacations
>Few days before 18th birthday and graduation
>Be good at BMX
>At skatepark and tard crashes into me, both at full speed
>Blown out intestines, blown out testicle
Cont?

>>690395743
I work but i have nothing else

>>690397461
Thank you anon well said
i go to a psychater to get through this

>>690397794
yes anon

>>690395716
yes, they are prescription but not prescribed

>>690397346
As i have said many times though out this thread, thanks is never needed, just helping out fellow humans, fellow anons.

You came off straight away as someone of intelligence, which is a good thing to have in a world where day to day life can be lost in a drone of ever present numbing media and a constantly judging society.

However as i have found with other people like yourself it can be easy to get lost in thoughts that can swirl continuously and can easily turn into a type of poison for the mind.

By no means was the question about medication a jab in anyway, it was more how you described chemical imbalances that made me think that you may have experience with them and therefor may of helped understand your situation a bit better, though your follow up post is very on point. You will most likely find that you know your mind and thought process's better than you believe.

Can i ask why your left the service and what you do for a job now, or if you have none what you do to occupy yourself? If you don't feel like answering that is absolutely fine and i will understand.

>>690397842
That sounds good Anon, best of luck with your life, stay strong, and stay proud of who you are

>me, 22 year old male on his second semester of Erasmus exchange programme
>my 3 year old relationship took a hard hit after first semester and abortion that happened in the inter semester interval, my decision to continue another semester killed the relationship completely
>in March I see a girl in my class that I instantly take liking to, her also being from another country we hang around and enjoy the English speaking company
>as months pass, we quickly become good friends, actually admitting that we are the closest people we both have here, even though knowing each other for only a few months
>my relationship is crashing and burning, me going to my home country at end of May to finally finish it off
>after I come back I ask the girl out on a date
>although she is 6 years older than me and cautious at first, we quickly fall in love, feeling something really special
>she is attractive, smart, and genuinely a good person that gets upset about wickedness of the world
>begin planning our future together, I gave up on my plan for next year of going to Australia just so I can be close to her
>we have it planned out, she finishes her Masters and then both go to Amsterdam, her for her Phd, me for my Masters
>really looking forward to what future might hold for us

>>690397735
Anon, i want to be honest with you but i don't want you to make any rash decisions.
I'm an army man myself and let me tell you it's not always like people think it is.
you get there and it's an entire different world from what you're used to.
You make friends, that later become family. yet, that doesn't rule out that you won't see them die in your hands or right before you.
You become a human machiene that builds you physhically and mentaly for a cause you will later question and sometimes will even keep you up at night thinking, "Have i done the right thing? have i done enough? "
As i said , my dear friend... it's not always that bright.
However, if you really want to "Die" that much, then that means you don't care about your life, am i right?
And if you don't care about your life, why would you surrender to your parents will and pre decided road for you ? it's not their path, not their life, why should they chain you to a destiny you never wanted to live?
I think you should find what you love in life, and just do it. But i'm not talking as a cliche', like "go be an artist if you like to draw" or something like that. i mean, decide to change your life - and do it. start exploring, investigate what makes you feel alive - and then do it until you're dead. Don't think too much about money or relationships because when you're happy from the inside and you love what you do, they come naturally. i may not be That old, but i've learned a lot from my commandors and mentors in my life. i'm telling you anon, this is just the start.
Please , do not start a path made for you by someone else, instead walk the path you created - for yourself.
I Think you need a change in your life anon, because you don't deserve a shitty life. please be brave and smart enough to do so . if you have any questions , i might be able to help you out as much as i can . so feel free to ask what ever you want, just feel free, friend.

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Can someone give me the non thumbnail version of this

>>690397831
Why don't you start going to gym, develop hobbies, start playing an insturment? do something productive that makes you feel good about yourself? you know, accumulating achievements sort of things?

>>690398839
This happened yesterday
>we go out on a date, have a wonderful lunch, enjoying the day, stopping in front of a window to see how good we look together (minor things I know, but remembering it makes me… feel)
>it being a beautiful day, we go hang around in the nature
>while there, we get talking about us, about our future
>she told no one we’re dating, the age difference being on her mind and she still being unsure of us
>unsure because she expects that I will tell her something that will make her reconsider what she thinks of me
>tell her I feel the same way – not that she can tell me anything of that kind, but that there are things of me that will make her see me for what I am
>she really thought of me as a down to earth good guy, someone that wants to make the world better by helping people (I do want to make the world better, although I care about the outcome more than about the process) , someone so loving that she couldn’t even comprehend it
>this being /b/, you can see where this is going
>she wants to hear it all, she wants to see my shadow and to see the depth it will give me
>me being a naïve dumb fuck, say it all, not at all expecting that she will understand, though having hope that whatever she says she feels for me is stronger than what I reveal

>>690383432
>20 y/o
>What is wrong with me /b/?

Fuck off, kiddo.

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>>690397794
Cont.
>Spend weeks on morphine drip in hospital waiting for surgery
>Best friend Steve stays at my bedside 24/7
>After surgery I notice Steve and gf being weird
>Strung out from morphine and after surgery meds so I can't figure out what's going on
>Gf becomes distant, try to get her to tell me what's wrong
>Become overly insistent and she tells me to fuck off
>punches me in the abdomen where I'd just had surgery
>Does it again a week later
>me:"Wtf is wrong with you"
>"I've been fucking steve and I hate you"
>BrainBreaks.jpg
>Lay in bed for weeks, no food, no sleep, only pain
>Finally recovered from injury
>Been forced to watch ex best friend disappear into ex's room where I used to sleep every night for months
>Get decent job
>Get own place
>Be 19
>Have Super hot girlfriend
>Wildest sex imaginable
>7 months in "I'm pregnant anon"
>HolyFuck.jpg
>Am stoked to be a dad
>She doesn't want it
>Gets abortion
>I'm devastated
>We hate each other after abortion and split
>Old hs friends are all drug addicts
>Spend next two years getting high on whatever is put in front of me
>Lose several jobs. Hate everything.
>Finally clean myself up
>Find good job in different city
>While moving I accidentally cut off my finger (pic related)
>Forced to move back in with abusive parents
>Week later my car is destroyed
>22nd birthday today, parents are away, no friends, no gf, no car, no job, no finger, I don't leave my bed now. Only 4chan.

>>690398974
>eugenics, real equality (not having problems with punching a girl given the circumstances), not believing in Holocaust the way it is presented, fapping to pretty much everything on the internet, eating fetus of my unborn child
>now that I see what I wrote, I kek at my hopes of her understanding
>she takes CP the worst, I used to do it when I was younger though now I cba with deep webbing it
>she sees this as the worst thing one can possibly do
>hour to hour, moment to moment, her mental image of me is blown to pieces
>she begins crying, saying that she really needs to start people for what they are, not for what she wants them to be
>says that if I wanted to break up with her, this is the most brutal way I could go around it
>we come to a place where we split ways
>she says that whatever she felt to me will never come back, that whatever she thought of me got smudged and won’t ever be restored
>she says that I should make the arrangements to go to Australia, as she knows that she can’t be with someone like me
>I want to cry but I can’t, it just isn’t happening
>we share a final kiss, my short term future being changed in one afternoon
>I ride off into the night, listening to Claire de Lune (our song) with full moon, laughing like a maniac

Compared to what some of you shared here this seems like the smallest thing in the world, though for me it feels... feels bad man.
First time I am sharing something in a feel thread actually.

>>690398842
That's why I can clearly say that anons are my only friends, ty so much man

>>690399053
do you have any money? (more than like 200 bucks)
because if you went on craigslist right now, and bought a cheap, 1500 dollar pickup truck, loaded your shit in it, and just rolled the fuck on, that could fix your problems.
just a thought.
also, happy birthday, and I really am sorry you must spend it alone. that's no way to spend your 22nd.

>>690398259
Feel free to ask and comment what ever that is on your mind, my friend. i greatly appreciate you, and your honest help. god bless you.

Well, I left my service mostly not by choice.
After 20 days in the field i got injured again, this time pretty badly and i wasn't sure i'm going to make it. All i personally wanted to do was to go back out there, but by the time i woke up the fighting was over. i was injured on the 20th days out of 22. almost a home run, eh? almost wasn't enough though. lost some friends, things happened, things changed. my commandor who was like a father figure mentor for me told me straight to my face that this place isn't for me , and even now with my own knowledge and abilities i can take his place, though it will be a terrible waste of my life. he said he cared about me too much to let me waste my most valuable asset i was ever lucky enough to have - which was my life.
And so, after i recovered , weather i liked it or not i left what seemed to be the only real family i ever had to this day. i left my 2nd home for this outside world which is full of blunt and false ideals. it doesn't sadden me anymore, but at times it broke me completely. not anymore though.

i used to have a "normal" job , and once i was done with that i decided i must go to a higher education instetution so i can learn something useful about my life. at this point i'm mostly drawn to economics and finance , because that's like "The science of money" and i have a very strong sense for those kind of things.

Right now i'm wating for my "Pre college tests" (SAT's as you'd call them, i presume) and all day long i pretty much read , learn and develop myself as much as possible. i don't practice martial arts anymore, though i regularly go to the gym and maintain a healthy diet and fitness.
I used to write , but i don't anymore. as i said before, i lack emotion to right something sincere and i think that's a very crucial basic element of writing.

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>>690398956
here ya go anon

>>690399779
Cont.
So , i mostly just learn and gain knowledge like 18 hours a day, because i rarely manage to sleep at nights.
I'm sorry, if i write a lot, this is just the only place to feel like..."home" for me anymore, and you're one of the few who's shown me enough kindness that has given me faith and hope that i may be honest about what's on my mind.

>>690399359
No problem brother. no problem. Don't ever feel alone, we're all here with you .

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>>690399662
I actually did that with that exact plan in mind, but after getting the truck home I realized it's going to need a shitload of work done before I'll be able to take it anywhere (I worked as a mech and built high performance cars/4x4's for a while so the repairs aren't an issue but the money for the parts is) pic related, it's undrivable ATM

>>690396274
I think this way too, but you and i fail to realize that negative emotions are also a part of the spectrum, they are needed to balance your mental state as much as positive emotions.
In the end, balance is what matters the most

>>690399999
Witnessed

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>>690399999

>>690400009
hey, great minds think alike?
what all is wrong with it? how much money do you need to get it drivable?
>>690399999
check'd

>>690399999
>>690399998

>>690399999
Feels thread are the best way to help people and been helped, and nice quints man ahah, ty for your help and ty to all that are united in this feels thread

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>>690399999

>>690379559
Estoy en una situación relativamente parecida a la tuya. Hace 6 años que no sé nada de ella pero no dejo de pensar en ella cada día... me trae de cabeza

>>690398969
I've lived a life where i have never felt anything else other than hate. I goto work, come home, take pills until i forget everything and wake up and repeat. its the only way i can live, ive tried to stop it but it gets unbearable

>>690400167
When I bought it I thought it was just running rough because the distributor was work right the fuck out, been chasing the issue for a week now and after replacing the entire ignition system I'm left scratching my head. Gonna look into possible ecu/fuel pump issue this week if i can figure out how to get some $

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>>690377302
>be me
>have a crush on a girl
>she has a bf
>abusive bf
>she is my best friend
>we share everything
>fast forvard 3 years i finally convice her to break up
>we get together
>best time of my life
>i'm actually happy
>fast forward 1 year
>realise i lost her as my best friend
>relationship is nor working we argue all the time
>break up
>she is devastated
>cries constantly and begs me to take her back
>says just until the finals are over
>next day i magically fall back in love
>pretend to love her for a few more months
>breaks my heart every day remembering what it was like
>break up with her after finals are over
>never felt so alone
>probably an hero a few weeks later

>>690400372
What kind of pills do you use, anon?

>>690400432
i don't remember much about the hardbodies, but aren't some carb'd?
you could just get a screwdriver and fuck with the carb until it runs right

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>>690400502
now she even blocked me on fb and hates my guts and i can't blame her

>>690400612
Non-carbed, the earlier ones with the twinspark Z engine were. This has a ka24e, same as an early 240sx

>>690399779
>>690399931
Don't apologies for post lengths, It isn't hurting no one.

It is awesome that you did keep your life, by the sounds of things you are a person that would be a definite loss to society.

It is great to hear that you are studying to further your knowledge in a field that you are interested in. I believe that after you finish your study you will find a place in this world where you will find that you fit into better than you do now, and with finding that will lead to a better, more peaceful, state of mind.

I am actually starting at a technology college in a month's time to further myself, so the excitement is real and i know how much just the thought of advancing in any field that you have an interest in can drastically change your mindset for the better. So good for you man, you are definitely a cut above many other people, doing the human race proud.

I believe that you will find a new family that you will be proud to be a part of. You have all the marks of a great person mate and the universe will take care of you, even if you feel, up to this point, that it hasn't as much.

As for the writing have you ever given it a go anyway? Even if it is just rough stuff written down you may find you enjoy it and it may help you emotion wise.

Also i am from NZ so not huge on what SATs are but i think i get the drift haha.

>>690400009
paypal?

>>690400561
xanax, duromine, codeine, valium, oxy, endone. Pretty much any pill i can get, xanax the most common one i take

Hey guys, what is the post limit now a days for these threads?

>>690401177
No pay pal unfortunately

>>690381885
She was only with him because he made her feel good about herself by being so shit. So desperate for love, he didnt even care. Feelsbadman

>>690384904
Well it's happening to me anon so suck it loser

>>690377378
>breathing his last