I feel underdeveloped as a person, and want to become someone who is interesting and someone interesting people want to be around with. I have very little life experience, and because of that, I have no clue who I am or what I want out of life. My interests and hobbies bring no self development and I am ultimately complacent. I need to improve myself, but I can't set goals because I don't know what I want or how to get it; I don't know what's out there. I am a loser who is surrounded by winners, but I can't figure out what it is I want to "win" at in order to be valuable to other people. Winners are social, likable, intelligent, people who people find interesting and who have experience other value and want to hear with deep personalities. I lack these, so I am no use to people.
I want to be a winner, but I don't know what I want or how to get it.
What do I do.
>>17287244
win at something. if that doesn't fulfill you, cross that off the list and try to win at something else. still feeling empty? pick something else. before you know it, you'll be a well-rounded person with many skills who has overcome a number of trials and maybe has a story to tell
>>17287244
you dont lack those, you havent made them yet
maybe find a "different" hobby, like to have a thing that is yours
set goals by writing down, either weekly or monthly, something to accomplish, and leave it on your desk or nightstand or anywhere it will be staring at you in the face, and just cross things off as you do them
make yourself feel like scratching it off is the goal, and make yourself do it - you should feel better when you have everything crossed off before the last day
>>17287244
As cheesy as that sound, there's a saying that goes "if you're the smartest person in the room - you're in the wrong room."
Learn from others around you. You shouldn't be copying them - just ask them what makes them passionate about the area you feel they "win" at. See what kind of ideals you support among those you're gonna hear.
Too much people pleasing. You seem to set your goals to what others say/expect and you seem to base your assessment of achievement on how well others like it. Here's life:
1) people will only tell you what you want to hear. They'll make their average achievement seem extraordinary. You'll never reach that level of awesomeness because, if you did, their goal would then be meaningless
2)Quit trying to find that one thing. Very few actually find something and immediately love it. Just start something. I sat down and brainstormed everything I thought a man should be, and am one by one checking them off. That drive has to come from within, because no one will carry you through it for you
Buy a good car and work on improving its performance.
