i'm a bad person
how do i stop
>>17007081
Kill yourself faggot, or apologies for your sins and i dont mean to god
>>17007083
but wouldn't you think that you can apologize so much before people doubt your sincerity
Embrace the evil within. Destroy what you hate and build what you love. disconnect yourself from morality, that illusion will only hold you back. Manipulate and control everything around you into a perfect chaos and learn to enjoy it.
Why stop if you can power through and build upon your dominant trait even if its being a bad person
>>17007081
>how do i stop
That depends on how you started. What makes you say you're a bad person?
>Ask vague questions
>Get vague answers
>>17007112
Only do it to that of which you feel are the worst, leave all the petty shit behind because everyone does some petty shit, then anytime someone offers you to do something you know is bad, say no to it>>17007112
>>17007119
I don't want to alienate myself, nor take advantage of others.
>>17007121
Because of all the careless stuff I have done, even with just taking 2016 in to account, and seeing how poorly I have treated those around me. More specifically me being toxic towards others and causing turmoil, I abandoned a pal in his time of need and I feel pretty cut up about that, I almost caused strife between this boy I was seeing and his pal, and overstepped boundaries with my best friend's boyfriend. I know I won't repeat this mistakes again. But it's tearing me up on the inside. I just want to live by morals and principles, but I have no idea where the fuck I'm meant to start.
>>17007128
I hope what I wrote above explained it.
>>17007129
I'll keep that in mind, thanks, anon.
>>17007142
You don't have to alienate yourself. Trust me morals are just pointless subjective constraints, once you let go of them completely you will become free. Manipulate people you don't like into becoming your allies and remember that turmoil and drama is inevitable and something that makes life genuinely interesting and memorable. Treat well those who deserve it and be kind for the ones fighting a harder battle.
Cause some chaos, embrace who you are and make the best of it !
>>17007142
>Because of all the careless stuff I have done, even with just taking 2016 in to account, and seeing how poorly I have treated those around me.
I've been there, OP. Right down to the carelessness and toxicity. This kind of realization is traumatic, and I'm sorry to hear that you're hurting. But congratulations: this is the first step out.
Honestly, you don't want to hear how I got out. I made way too many mistakes in the process, messing myself up even so badly that 20 years later I'm only just bow starting to see myself as really recovered. I would spare you that, so my advice to you comes not from knowing what I got right, but from knowing what I got wrong.
1) Get a therapist. More broadly, do not try to do this alone, but a therapist is especially important. This is about reinventing yourself, and you will need feedback. Without it, you are liable to forget something important, and trying to add these things in later is even harder.
2) Apologuze to everyone you should apologize to. Real apologies: "I hurt you, and I shouldn't have done that; what can I do to make things right?" But remember that there may be people you shouldn't apologize to: for example, people who have made it clear that they never want to interact with you again. In cases like these, the best you can do is make peace with their memory, by finding ways to help people in situations to what you caused.
3) Consider hanging out here for a while. Helping people feels good, and learning about their problems may give you insight into your own. A lot of regulars here are regulars for exactly these reasons. I am too. You would not be alone. I apologize in advance for the redpillers who are currently raiding us from /r9k/.
4) There are some books and courses I want to recommend. Only one of them can really be called a self-help book: the others are texts (or in one case a whole course) on negotiation, psychology, and intellectual history. But this is for another post.
(Continues)
>>17007211
(Continued)
Book club time. I came to these late in my recovery time, and I wish I'd found them sooner. They could have cut years off of it.
1) "Getting to Yes", by Roger Fisher and William Ury, is an introductory textbook about negotiation, which probably sounds like a strange thing to recommend in a situation like this. The reason is that while it's not actually a text on empathy, it nevertheless demonstrates empathy in a way that really resonated with me, probably due to the lack of puppies and rainbows. Since we had the same problem, it may resonate with you too.
2) "Character Strengths and Virtues" is by Martin Seligman. This is more expensive than the previous book, because it's a comprehensive text on the field of positive psychology: the study of how and why people bear up under pressure, rather than how they break down under it. It identifies 24 basic strengths, but more importantly, it shows you how to use what you're strong in to build up the things you're weak in.
3) "Birth of the Modern Mind" is an online course on intellectual history by Alan Kors. I recommend this because of the practice it provides in emulating new modes of thought. Even the first class will change the way you think forever, and the remaining classes will only reinforce this.
4) "The Five Love Languages", by Gary Chapman, is about relationships. It's the only actual self-help book on my list, and as a book, I'm afraid it's not actually all that good. It indulges in gratuitous Christianity at inappropriate times, and the test it puts forth in the back is awful. But the basic theory is sound enough, and it's a grrat introduction to non-verbal cues.
Basically, I'm telling you to learn this stuff the same way you learned as a young child: take whatever you can from every source. Seligman is the closest I get to suggesting a book on morals ans principles, which is what you asked for, but these will work anyway.
