I have asked my gf to marry me 2 times and both times she said no. First proposal was when we had dated 1,5 yeares and she thought it's too early to think about marriage at that point. I dealt with it and decided not pressure her because I thought we will be together forever anyway. Now we have been together for four years, I love her more than anything, I want to spend rest of my life with her really, then I proposed. And she said no again. She still doesn't feel like she's ready to marry me.
Help me. I don't know what to do right now. I don't want to wait forever until she's ready for marriage but I don't want to waste my time and money for proposals if she says no anyway. What should I do, I want to be with her so much and marry her but she says she still not ready for marriage?
ask her when she'll be ready
>>16813111
Dump dat bitch
>>16813111
How old are you both?
>>16813111
She doesn't love you that much is what she is trying to say
>>16813111
I would just end the relationship since I can't cope with such rejection
>>16813111
What's your goal with marriage? You want kids? Or is it just to be married as an indication that you're committed to each other for life?
Are you both out of school? Have decent pay jobs or a pretty clear career path?
If you have specific goals you might want to talk about them.
>>16813122
She is 31 and I'm 28.
>>16813151
We want kids and commitment for life. We are both out of school and have fulltime jobs.
>>16813167
lol, are you dumb? marrying an older woman is equal to suicide, her body will go to hell in a few years and you will live miserably for the rest of your life.
OP she will never be ready for marriage with YOU.
>>16813174
He is 28, he is not exactly a spring chicken himself. Get a grip.
>>16813111
After reading the thread, I suggest
Ask again; one more time.
If she says no, break it off and remove her from your life.
>>16813167
I dunno dude. Maybe ask her what kind of time frame she sees this happening? Because otherwise it seems like "doesn't feel like she's ready" means "not sure you're the right guy for her". Like either there's a real reason why she's feeling like this, or she's holding out to see if someone better will come along.
I also don't get why you have to spend a lot of time and money on proposing.
>>16813192
a 28 yo man can do way better than a 31 woman, unless he is a fat beta he is committing suicide
why do you think she don't like the idea of getting married?
>>16813286
I have no idea. Around 1 year mark we discussed about getting married and she said she would get married to me sometimes. Now she's reject my proposals twice. I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose her but I want her to marry me.
>>16813350
>I don't want to lose her but I want her to marry me.
I'm sorry, OP, but this isn't going to work. Let her go.
Getting married is not something to be done lightly, and it's perfectly acceptable to take some time to be sure you're ready. It's even perfectly acceptable to decide that you aren't ready, provided that, having already taken some time to think about it, you understand why. But there are limits.
It has been two and a half years since the last time you asked her to marry you. I cannot say whether or not she wants to marry you. But I strongly suspect that she can't either. Despite the fact that you've already proposed to her -despite the fact that you have nade your intentions absolutely clear in no uncertain terms- she hasn't even been thinking about marrying you.
This, in and of itself, speaks volumes. She says that she isn't ready to marry you, and this is true: she is not. But if this is the way she thinks about such things, then she is never going to be ready. Not unless something major changes, and that's a change your relationship is unlikely to survive.
Here; I'll give you a sample:
"I'm ready to get married. You're not. I respect that, but it means I have to let you go. I'm sorry, but marriage is something I need. I can't force you into something you don't want, but in that case, this just isn't working for us."
If she responds that this isn't what this is about, then add the following:
"Then what do you need? I won't stay in a relationship that isn't giving us both what we need: I can't sacrifice me, and I won't sacrifice you. But I don't know what you need, and that's making this unbearably frustrating. I need to know, and I need to know soon. Take whatever time you need, but I can't wait forever, so put this at the top of your list".
>>16813174
Your stupid. Everyone gets old, its life. Shes only 3yrs older anyways.
Someone like you would die old and alone because you tried to chase younger woman your whole life but no girl wants you cause your old and wrinkly.
If your goal is marriage and she isn't receptive to the idea chances are high this will drive a wedge between you two.
Best to find someone new.
>>16813425
hi tumblerina :)
Typically couples talk about marriage before you actually propose
When you propose you should already know her answer, it's the when and where of proposing that makes it a surprise
>>16813111
Cheat on her
>>16813111
If you're even considering marriage in this day and age, then you're an idiot.
Marriage can only end poorly for men. There's no benefit whatsoever.
>>16814107
Classy
Why would you want to get married in this day and age? If you get divorced its gonna fuck you over big time.
>>16813111
Marriage is overrated.
>>16814164
Fucking redpillers. Go back to your masturbatorium, creep.
>>16813604
That isn't Tumblrina shit.... that's just someone that knows better. you're an ass/
At 28 and 31, after 4 years of dating if she's not ready by now she probably never will be. Decide if you're okay with the idea of never getting married. Otherwise, it's time to move on.
Before breaking up, however, you could try talking to her to find out why she doesn't want to get married. Maybe she's afraid of commitment, for example.
diggoo :D:D
>>16813111
Most women want to marry; if she doesn't want to marry you she doesn't want to marry you.
Why the fuck would you keep trying to marry the same woman that DOES NOT WANT TO MARRY YOU?
Move on.
She'll eventually dump you anyway, prepare your anus.
>>16813192
Are you literally fucking kidding. My dad is five years older than my mum so this 28 year old could be going out with 23 year olds if he wanted.
>>16813111
As other anons have said, it sounds like she doesn't want to marry you.
I think it's probably worth one last conversation, just tell her that you want to get married, so if she doesn't then you will have to move on. However even if she says then and there "okay I'll marry you", consider your options wisely, and judge for yourself whether you think she actually wants to or whether she's just trying to appease you for five minutes.
You should probably move on OP, never a good thing to hear but tough decisions are an irremovable fact of life. Rip the band aid my son.
