XXX-rated, made in SFM
would cost nothing to make and would rake in millions.

Emily Blunt stepping on my balls

I don't want a Metroid movie because they'll make her talk, and she's always been a silent protagonist.

Also the games are about exploration and backtracking and puzzle solving, it's not really cinematic material.

Also a movie would spawn the inevitably awful movie tie-in game, and the series would be deader than it already is after Other M shat it all up.

Samus is investigating a distress signal coming from a space station. It has been overrun by a ravenous species, Samus kills most of them in during the beginning, while showcasing both how dangerous the creatures are, and how powerful the chozo suit is.
About a quarter in, something happens that prevents samus from summoning the suit, or the suit malfunctions somehow.
The rest of the movie is samus trying to evade the few remaining specimens, while navigating to the control room to crash it to a nearby planet and fleeing to the gunship.
Basically Aliens: Metroid version.

>>338247335
How about fucking no? I fucking hate female protagonists in action roles, they are uniformly awful and you terrible for thinking otherwise.

>>338247335
No, I guess your faggot ass want something worse then Other m.

>>338247335

Metroid anime with stand alone episodes with occasional archs, but with an overarching plot about Samus being haunted by Phantoon. I like the idea that Phantoon is now a lovecraftian horror.

>>338247335
The movie starts with Samus exploring a deserted facility. She reaches the thing she was looking for. When she goes to retrieve it, however, space pirate show up. They manage to distract Samus and snatch the treasure away from her. Turns out, they were waiting for her to locate the object, because they knew she would lead to something valuable. Only, they didn't know what exactly. Regardless, they attack her, so she takes a couple out, before making a run back to her ship. The ship is missing from it's original landing zone, but it swoops in just in time for Samus to hop aboard. When it's made apparent why the ship had moved. it was being chased by Ridley, who comes in dive bombing the ship, and trying to rip it apart. Samus fires some artillery, and manages to shake Ridley off, and escape.

That's just the intro. After evading the space pirates, Samus reflects on what the treasure was, and why it was important. Turns out, it was Chozo technology. And perhaps a clue to their whereabouts. Finding this particular object was a personal mission. One that she wouldn't even tell to the federation.

The federation though, contacts her on ship, and informs her of space pirate activity in such-and-such sector. So Samus goes to investigate. Expecting to get paid, of course. She still needs to eat. When she gets close to the suspected planet, she receives a distress signal, and she lands nearby. She lands in the middle of an old Chozo settlement. Now abandoned.

She goes to investigate, encountering the dangers you would expect from a Metroid game. When she gets to the location of the distress beacon, she finds a bunch of dead federation soldiers. It's strange that they're there. The federation made no mention of their men being in the vicinity.

>>338252431
Well she accesses their logs, and finds that they were attacked by space pirates. They were looking for a similar treasure that Samus was looking for, only they suffered a more dire fate. That's when Samus realizes that the federation was secretly looking for the Chozo, and the pirates knew the true value of these treasures, perhaps looking for the chozo themselves, in order to plunder. The federation was using Samus.

In any case, Samus decides to hunt down the pirates, and get the two thingies back. Aaaaand... I hcan't really think how that will all play out right now.

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Katheryn Winnick in skin-tight light-blue spandex suit.

>>338252764
>5'6''
No. Whoever is playing the part, needs to be tall and lanky, so when the costume designers fit the bulky suit on her, she won't look squat.