Who's in charge of the school rules at Hogwarts?
What would've happened to Harry if he simply refused to participate in the Triwizard Tournament?
Would he have been cursed? Expelled?
Why does whoever gets their name tossed into the Goblet of Fire absolutely HAVE to take part in the tournament?
What if someone just threw Dumbledore's name into the fire?
>>71895657
So it's a goblet... do you drink the fire?
Like firewater?
Like Native American racism?
That lady author was trying to tell us Indians can't hold their liquor.
>>71895657
Snape would have fucked him, man.
Snape would have taken him in every hole. He would have fucked him six ways 'til Sunday. Harry would have been on all fours, begging him to stop at first, and then begging him for more. Snape would fill him with thick, warm potion and then fuck the potion out of him. Harry would be a drooling, babbling wreck by the time he was done.
Who's bright idea is it to put a 14 year old in an area with a firebreathing dragon?
DIDJA PUTCHA NAME IN DA GAWBLET ARRY
How does hogwarts prepare you in anyway for the real world when the wizarding world is implied to be getting smaller and smaller
What will Harry do for a job when urban expansionism forces the magical community out
>>71895844
the baddies, obviously. Did you see the film or read the book?
>>71895657
The implication was that the goblet would cause something magical and terrible to happen to him if he didn't compete.
>>71895657
Rowling admitted she shit the bed with Goblet of Fire
>>71896249
Explain further.
What the fuck did you expect you fucking child laughed out of /lit/? Harry Potter was easily one of the dullest franchise in the history of movie franchises. Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series’ only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.
Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but it’s certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.
>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."
I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King.
>>71895986
after learning at Hogwarts you are stuck working for the wizarding community no matter what, there's no other possible future for you.
Imagine some muggleborn deciding after finishing school fuck this magic shit, and tries to go back to the muggle world and live. Good luck getting a job when the last 7 years you didn't learn any maths or sciences.
>>71896292
this is a pasta, right?
>>71896292
my sentiments exactly
>>71896052
Wasn't that the point of the event? Take the golden egg from a dragon?
>>71896249
what up tumblr
do you have anymore false flags to post on twitter?
>>71896276
There was a Harry Potter TV thing a few years ago in the UK, and she basically said GoF was a nightmare that she was on the verge of scrapping, but her publicists threatened her with a fucking uprising if the book wasn't out on time
>>71895844
To be fair, they only meant to put 17 year olds in an arena with a firebreathing dragon. That's why they had the age line around the Goblet.
>>71896571
I believe that voldemorts plan makes no sense as it stands. About forty things need to happen that are completely out of his control it would make a lot more sense if their plan was simply to force Harry into the tournament hoping that he gets killed or badly injured, but the plan hinges on Harry surviving the first two challenges and winning the third.
>>71896422
Yea, but the baddies put him into the event. He didn't enter himself.
>>71896385
Yep
>>71896292
Pasta of truth
>>71898242
pasta of complete shit
>>71899079
I don't think the idea that the books are rubbish should be so controversial.
>>71898242
this
the fact that the only thing people ever cry about is the image is proof that its 100% correct
Minus 1312313123244 points for Slytherin
>>71895844
The same geniuses that thing that a sport where enchanted balls of lead home in on children's skulls.
>>71899105
you're a dumbfuck its from a review of possibly the worst film which the reviewer still gave a 7/10
>>71897814
It would make sense if Voldemort was also secretly rigging the tournament.
>>71899683
I'll type that out again, non-retarded:
The same geniuses that think that a sport where enchanted balls of lead home in on children's is a safe and fun activity for children to play.
Seriously, even though they have healing magic they have no magic to bring back the dead, so if a lead ball moving at 60mph shatters a kid's skull, killing them instantly, how the fuck do the teachers explain that to the parents?
>>71899777
>mph
>all this butthurt over quidditch
pussy
>>71899770
No it wouldn't. The whole point of the tournament is to get Harry to win so he touches the cup, taking him to Moldywart. BUT IT'S SO FUCKING STUPID. There are a million ways of getting Harry to him and that's the one they choose. Even if they did rig it it will still be dangerous, where many things can go wrong. They sneaked in a man who has taken the form of a renowned bad wizard hunter and is hiding him in a tiny box. How about, instead of the stupid idea of going through all that hassle just so he can give Harry advice for the tournament he kidnaps Harry. The plot makes so little sense it's Star Wars prequel tier.
>>71896421
Jesus fuck this is pretentious pasta
>>71899861
>Hey dude, just turn off your brain
>If you do it will hide my terrible writing ability
>>71899905
>replying to a low IQ memer
mate
>>71899870
because they wanted nobody to know what was happening, so they sent a death eater to set it all up, having one man on the inside is all you really need to stealth operations. voldemort wanted to make a big event out of killing harry in the tournament
>>71899872
>He doesn't know what pretentious means
>>71899905
DUDE FANTASY ISNT REAL WTF I HATE FANTASY NOW
>>71899952
How do I not? The last two lines are. They are elitist as fuck
>>71899952
It's pretentious, not him. Quit you're incandescent faggotry
>>71899870
Pretty much this. After getting in as Moody he could have had Harry touch a portkey at pretty much any time he wanted over the school year. He could have abducted Harry and brought back Voldemort within week 1.
As for OP's question, I'm going to have to google it. Fuck.
>>71899872
Does it make you insecure?
>>71895657
>kids getting petrified
>kids getting killed
>kids being taught arson and curses
>has a forest full of man eating spiders
>has a giant fucking snake
>has a giant dog
>has a tree that will fucking kill you
>literally trained lord voldemort in killing people and making them horcruxes
>this school somehow has funding
I don't fucking understand how the wizard world can function on this shit. Like where do they get the money to support this fuck huge castle?
>>71899921
>because they wanted nobody to know what was happening
No one would have known either be they secretly snuck him out. They don't even need to do that, all they need is a bit of blood. How hard could that be for the guy on the inside to get without anyone knowing?
>voldemort wanted to make a big event out of killing harry in the tournament
Ah I see, Voldermort's one weakness is he is a fucking idiot. I can understand hubris or stupidity in villains but Rowling has no idea how utterly stupid it is. She could have orchestrated something where Voldemort gets fucked over by his pride that doesn't saddle him with the intelligence of George Lucas.
>>71900012
Voldemort has a massive ego? you think he doesnt want everyone to be talking about how he completely nuttered the ministries first triwizard tournament in however long. he had a massive hard on the entire time thinking about the headlines
>>71900033
>money
slave labor and witchcraft and wizardy
>>71900088
how does voldemort masturbate? does he use nagini has some sort of fleshlight/dildo combo?
>>71900053
If voldemort succeeded he would have been utterly feared. Hell he pretty much already was in failing, he caused the ministry to break down like a bunch of limey wankers
>>71900199
>masturbate
he uses all of the unforgivable curses and amortentia on muggles or witches ill let you figure out which order
>>71900028
No? Im not a manchild?
>>71899989
>He thinks elitism necessitates pretension
>He doesn't know what pretentious means
To be pretentious requires a posturing about something, not having an attitude towards something. That post could have been written by a pretentious person but it doesn't have to be.
Say person A likes classic music and dislikes rock music and tells person B this who holds the opposite opinion. And say that person B asks a question which allows for this. Is person A pretentious? We don't know. We don't have enough information because we don't know why he holds the opinions he does (which is the element that makes someone pretentious).
This person dislikes Harry Potter and thinks it's shit. Since it is not the opinion that makes someone pretentious but the way in which it relates to other people this person gets a pass for this. So far not pretentious. Next they set up a set of things they think are better. Again as for reasons already stated not pretentious. It ends with some elitist quotes, but considering that elitism is not a necessary component of pretension they also get a free pass.
There is nothing in the post which makes that person pretentious. They could be, but there is not enough material provided to know for sure.
>>71896421
i've watched all of those films and more, what's your point
>>71900308
Jesus christ youre a tryhard pushing that stale pasta
>>71900308
You're talking to people that only watch capeshit and flavor of the week television shows like DR WHO
Why would a school have a group of people where everyone is the bad guy. Why did she write Slytherin to be so bad?
>>71900279
>he uses all of the unforgivable curses and amortentia on muggles or witches ill let you figure out which order
wait since the imperius curse makes people your slave does that mean voldemort can make woman just fuck him whenever he wants?
and then he could imperius the husbands and make them unwilling cucks while he slams his basilisk inside their chamber of secrets?
>>71900308
Jesus fuck this was cringey tryhard fuckery
Did you just pass Lit 101 today in Freshman year?
>>71900308
You are a sad faggot who is really trying here
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/pretentious
>>71900429
>>71900369
>>71900344
Memes don't equal a definition.
>>71900467
But your link agrees with >>71900308
>>71900503
I'm sorry if you have bad reading comprehension then.
>>71900369
youre projection is cancer
>>71900403
>wait since the imperius curse makes people your slave does that mean voldemort can make woman just fuck him whenever he wants?
thats exactly what it means
>and then he could imperius the husbands and make them unwilling cucks while he slams his basilisk inside their chamber of secrets?
yes yes
>>71900562
"having or showing the unpleasant quality of people who want to be regarded as more impressive, successful, or important than they really are"
>than they really are
Believing that Harry Potter is shit and those other movies are better would only be pretentious if the person in question expressed such opinions in order to appear greater than they are. That is literally the position I just outlined.
>>71900643
And isn't that what they are doing?
>>71900589
Your mobile posting is showing, shitskin
>>71895657
He could have just half assed every test for a minute then given up and it would have been fine.
>>71900717
There is nothing in that post that necessitates pretension. The post is very elitist but being elitist does not necessarily make a person pretentious. The person who made it may have been but we can't know just based on that post.
>>71900767
>ETERNAL
>GLORY
>all those retards talking about wizards lack of math and science classes and how hopeless they would be in muggle world
who gives a shit lol? why would you care when you have magic?! you are literally demi-god on earth, you dont need ANY money, people will just do anything you want and agree to anything you want. even squib can make himself millionare and live in massive mansion with hundred servant with just couple magical items.
the problem with rowlingverse is that there exists wizarding world at all. why have wizarding world and have some wizards be bums and low wage workers when they could all live among muggles and live like kings?
>>71899777
You're still retarded, they explicitly say that bad injuries barely ever happen and no one's died in years; and even that might have been F&G trolling Harry. Obviously it isn't anywhere near as dangerous as you're imagining, try again.
>>71900825
muggle world sucks desu. and potions and divination are pretty fucking cool. potions and herbology are the science equivalents
>>71900403
>wait since the imperius curse makes people your slave does that mean voldemort can make woman just fuck him whenever he wants?
>and then he could imperius the husbands and make them unwilling cucks while he slams his basilisk inside their chamber of secrets?
And muggleborns are a thing, amirite?
why didnt they just use guns
>>71900952
if guns became popular they would probably invent some antiprojectile rings and amulets and all start wearing them. boring to write about.
>>71900952
see the first part of >>71896292
>>71900769
So it's a probably pretensious post
>>71900053
>No one would have known either be they secretly snuck him out
Yes they would. If Harry Potter goes missing randomly from school, nobody would let that go, especially not Dumbledore or the ministry, but if he disappeared in a maze full of deadly traps as part of the competition then they could have just claimed he fell fowl of a trap and died.
>>71900952
this has to be the lamest thing ive ever heard. wizards can teleport, turn you into a ferret, control people, impersonate people etc
>>71901002
>guns not being introduced was bad
>the wands are like guns wah
>why didnt they use guns
........yea no duh a duel is like a gunfight, you will use cover and position to you advantage because you dont want to get hit by anything when fights consist of disarming spells, stunning spells and killing curses
>>71901113
They only need a couple of hours. He goes of for adventures all the time. No one is going to notice before he gets him out. Or if voldemort can magic the cup to teleport him to him why doesn't he magic something else. Why doesn't he just prick Harry's finger, telling him some bs why and take the blood?
The maze is the most convoluted, fail prone plan to do something really, really simple. What happened if Harry was just like nah I'm not entering? What the fuck are they going to do about it? What if he fails or dies in any of the events? What if he loses? What if the inside guys gets discovered because he is hanging around for so much longer than would be needed for a not stupid plan?
>>71901298
>what happened if Harry was just like nah I'm not entering? What the fuck are they going to do about it? What if he fails or dies in any of the events? What if he loses? What if the inside guys gets discovered because he is hanging around for so much longer than would be needed for a not stupid plan?
why are you putting so much yet so little thought. Binding magical contract. harry isnt a wuss. He wont lose because barty crouch tskes care of it, he only has to survive the third two tasks and barty helps. barty takes care of the third entirely
>>71901384
first two tasks*
And mad eye was infamous nobody was fucking with him except dumbeldore and dumbeldore grew a little suspicious at the end but couldnt do anything
>>71901280
>duel is like a gunfight
only for pleb tier wizards. dumbles and voldy were using massive and mass transfiguration like its piss easy shit. the way rowling verse works is basically
shit tier wizards who cant even protego < normal muggle < normal wizards < elite soldier < skilled wizard < very powerful wizards like moody/bellatrix/snape <<<<<<powergap<<<<<< gods on earth like voldemort/dumbledore/grindewald
>>71901425
yea i know im just saying people criticize the fights when they would be fast paced and adrenalized for the majority of wizards who cant duel their asses off
The plan for using Moody was actually really solid and it was kind of last minute voldemort found out the tournament was being held only a month or two before hand, thats when he kidnapped moody
>>71901384
But what does a binding magical contract mean? It's never explained. It's literally Rowling just magicing the plot to go how she wants to when there is no logical sense. Why doesn't he force him to be bound to some magical contract that makes him take a holiday to where he lives? It's completely arbitrary. Rowling just says I want this to happen. I don't care how it will fuck with the consistency of my universe or what loopholes or whatnot it will create because I can just use magic I make up on the spot to stop anything I realise later makes the whole thing stupid.
> he only has to survive the third two tasks and barty helps.
Yep a 14 year old only has to survive a DRAGON. What could go wrong? Are you really saying that any normal person would go "I could capture him or acquire his blood in a safe and fast method, or I could make him fight a dragon and some fish people to achieve the exact same thing. It's okay I have a guy who can give him a hint."
>>71895774
He'd probably call Harry 'Lily' the whole time as well.
>>71901604
>Yep a 14 year old only has to survive a DRAGON. What could go wrong? Are you really saying that any normal person would go "I could capture him or acquire his blood in a safe and fast method, or I could make him fight a dragon and some fish people to achieve the exact same thing. It's okay I have a guy who can give him a hint."
he survived a basilisk, maybe he knew he was a good flyer. maybe he didnt care because its just a game breh
>>71901604
>>71901667
To add technically Harry has voldemorts soul inside him its why he can talk to snakes and part of the reason why hes so powerful. Voldemort knows harry is tough shit, probably not why but he has no problem challenging him.
Technically also Harry couldnt die because Voldemort was his horcrux
>>71901748
forget that last part that doesnt happen til the end of goblet
>>71901748
>Harry couldnt die because Voldemort was his horcrux
the fuck are you talking about. harry was voldemort horcrux and when harry dies voldy has one horcrux less, thats all. harry isnt protected by anything except plot armor.
>>71901782
i said i fucked that up disregard
>>71901782
I meant harrys blood was in voldemort so harry couldnt die unless voldemort did because his moms protective spell was in him and voldemort since he uses his blood at the end of goblet. but disregard..basically voldy likes to fuck with harry and really wanted to make headlines and give a big fuck you not only to harry potter but dumbledore and the ministry for doing it under their noses
>>71901858
>harrys blood was in voldemort so harry couldnt die unless voldemort did because his moms protective spell was in him and voldemort since he uses his blood at the end of goblet
horcruxes dont work that way. you dont make someone or something horcrux by just dropping some blood in them or onto something. harry had no horcruxes of his own.
>>71901782
harry lives because he was the owner of all 3 of the deathly hallows which makes you immune to death or some shit
>>71901911
no you arent understanding im not talkimg about a horcrux. i mean when voldemort revives himself with harrys blood hes effectively doubling its power and harry cant die unless voldemort himself does
>>71901930
it wasnt just that....but this
>>71901966
and the fact that he chose not to die in purgatory because he had friends and family to fight for
>>71901911
Lily potters protection is doubled in the graveyard scene
>>71899777
they probably get enchanted with some shit so their skulls dont shatter on impact of a bludger. who knows, its not like rowling really thought of this shit
>>71902035
Does it really matter though when this is about wizards. I thought the least amount of exposition is best for worldbuilding
>>71902065
yea it really doesnt matter but if people want to get autistic about shit then they need to realize the answer to their stupid question is probably something throwaway and not incredibly detailed. its a kids book for fucks sake
>>71899770
Which he was using Moody/Barty Crouch Jr to do.
This was clear even in the movies.
>>71902109
Yea, its better to have a discussion and suppose than say oh its because of x. in my opinion. Of course its a kids book, rowling put some good thought into it but she wasnt trying to be autistic like jrr tolkien
>>71900012
Because he's a villain in a childrens book. Do you complain when saturday morning villains' plans are overblown and campy?
>>71901425
>tfw you will never see the epic dumbledore/grindelwald duel
>>71902240
instead we will get dumbledore dumbleinghis backdoor
>>71902171
Kipling could write children's works that were consistent and made sense. Writing things for children isn't a license to be terrible.
>>71901748
You are missing the point.
>>71902296
they do make sense when you arent nitpicking anything and everything
>>71902240
Yeah, I dont see why Grindelwald seemed so much more interesting than Voldemort.
>>71901782
Voldemort actually becomes Harry's pseudo-Horcrux like the anon said. It's when Voldy takes in Harry's blood at the end of GoF. That's how harry survives the killing curse in the Deathly Hallows in the books. But of course the movies just went with "lel just decide not to die, harry xD"
>>71902305
Explain
Voldemort successfully kidnaps an auror Moody who is det to be the Defense against the darks arts professor. He wants to kill harry potter and really make a big deal out of it, he also hates dumbledore and hogwarts, he wants to shame them, he wants to shame the ministry for being impotent
>>71902359
the movies didnt 'go with that', that was just a main theme overcoming death. i knew what was going on
>>71902341
grindewald had high ambitions and ideas. shit that even dumbles believed at times.
voldemort was a broken child who never really grew up. all he cared about was being special. if it turned out that there are many parselmouths in hogwarts he would most likely stop using it altogether. but since it was special and he was ONE, TRUTH AND ONLY heir of slytherin he latched onto it and proceeded to do what he thought slytherin wanted to do.
>>71902296
Yeah but Kipling is an author that wrote literature
Rowling wrote books for cash
>>71902439
i bet more people have successful careers now that read harry potter than those who read kipling
>>71902430
Yeah Voldemort really was just an ego babby
Grindewald wanted to tap into that unknowable, truly arcane shit. So did Dumbledore.. but he knew it was just too dangerous.
Grinde really did nothing wrong
>>71902439
The jungle book is a children's story.
>>71902326
You could say that about the star wars prequels. And noticing glaring plot holes so large they make an entire movie/book non-sensible isn't nitpicking.
>>71902402
Maybe you're incredibly good at piecing things together but you're average viewer isn't going to think
" hmm I wonder how Harry survived a full on killing curse without his mother's protection. Oh I know it's because when Voldemort resurrected himself with Harry's blood, this unstable bit of Dark Magic resulted in some unforseen side effects not established or hinted that not even the most powerful Dark Wizard guessed at and is never mentioned. Good thing I paid attention all those years ago!!"
>>71895657
we needed a series with young actors, harry potter happened to be there, it's the best we could get
>>71902480
What does this have to do with anything?
>>71902521
theres nothing that makes any of the movies non-sensible youre just refusing to believe some answer because its simple
>>71902527
most people have read the books, not that it matters the films standalone or are complementary. if theres something you dont get about thousand of pages of a series you could just look it up like a normal person
>>71902544
No one has explained how the triwizard tournament makes any sense, and that is sort of the entire novel. So what is the very simple reason why Voldemort would risk losing ever getting Harry's blood in a very uncertain and dangerous set of events where many things could backfire, as opposed to doing an actual simple thing with a greater chance of success and less risk to his aims?
>>71902341
>>71902430
>>71902481
Yes this. It's because you can actually see the motivation and reasons behind Grindelwald. There is no end game for Voldemort. Was he just gonna be emperor of the world? Grindelwald was actually a visionary who was taking Wizarding to its logical conclusion. Eventually the Wizarding world has to be exposed. He wanted to do it in the optimal way and establish a society where wizards use their powers to make quality of life better for everyone.
>>71902538
Its just a spin on the old "those critics are just jealous because she made lots of money" defense used by commonly by HP and Twilight fans when they can't counter something.
>>71902601
I already stated, the triwizard tournament is a big deal, voldemoet had grudges against dumbledore, Hogwarts and the ministry he wanted to one up everyone and surprise kill harry in extra time
>in a very uncertain and dangerous set of events where many things could backfire, as opposed to doing an actual simple thing with a greater chance of success and less risk to his aims?
youre making it sound like a bigger deal than it is, harry is a prettu good wizard. voldemort has no trouble making harry the center of attention to hype things up. moody was there so they wouldnt backfire, that was the jist barty is a very loyal servant, and voldemort trusted him
>>71902659
>in almost all fiction the visionaries like Grindewald or Lex Luthor are always prevented from making the world a better place by small scale moralfags like Dumbledore or M-MUH JUSTICE capeshitters
>>71902663
>cant counter something
>point out how hp was more influential than the jungle book
ok
>>71902688
Being a good wizard doesn't make any of what happens even approaching safe. Do you remember all the times he nearly died. If he did a lot of things slightly different he would be dead. A HUUUGE amount of luck allowed him to do well. If he was such a great wizard and the help given him was super effective (he was only given a hint for each challenge) then there shouldn't have been that much danger, yet he was clearly fighting for his life the whole time.
>>71902791
is a tournament, the film had a different tone that was amped up like a gladiator match when it was all really just wizard Olympics thst were regulated, nothing too dangerous except for VOLDEMORT
they arent gonna have harry yawning and scratching his nuts of course he was going to be tested that doesnt mean its absurd
>>71902850
In the books he gets singed by the dragon and almost drowns. If there where no plot armor and the dragon was just a tiny bit closer or the person didn't pull him out of the water in time what happens then?
>>71902749
>>71902929
you cant just not have the main character encounter any sort of resistance or danger, see rey
>>71902929
> he gets singed by the dragon and almost drowns.
wht? where?
>>71903024
he gets singed in the movie too i think. and was it the grindeylows that almost drown him?
I want to fug Bellatrix Lestrange.
>>71903092
in the book, he wass hurt on hand or shoulder by Horntail not stinged. he completes the task rather comfortably.
Grindeylows were overdramatic in the movie. In the book, when harry shows them his wand, they step aside. Again harry completes task comfortably.
Best deaths scenes
1. Dobby
2. Snape
3. Dumbledore
4. Hedwig
5. Sirius
6. Harry
7. Voldemort
>>71903112
same.
she would be pretty good as mommyfu. would punish you by crucio curse and then will ask you to fuck harder.
>>71903024
Or he gets whacked by the dragons tail. I might be getting the movie and book mixed up.
>>71903007
No, but you can have him face danger in a way which isn't stupid. The whole point of the novel is Moldywart uses Harry's blood to come back. You could remove the trisexual tounry and have ample room to invent scenarios which make sense that contain action and danger.
>>71903126
oh so why is that guy complaining thst harry almost died and voldemorts plan was stupid? of course the movies were more dramatic, plus the director was crazy
>>71903169
he doesn't get "whacked" by dragon.
Both 1st and 2nd task were overblown in movie.
>there are people in this world who will happily dedicate an hour of their time to argue about childrens movies in an autistic web-spinning forum
>>71903169
>>71903197
>>71903126
Apparently Harry wasnt in danger too much in the first couple tasks, just seemed that way for the film because it was the action film of the series
>>71903209
They are all overblown lol the third task is the shining part deux. but it fits the movie...i enjoy it but i think its the worst, it works because its like it is constantly
How does Teen pregnancies work ?
it was implied that everybody was fucking during yule ball times.
so do they use bubble mask type magic on penis or there were condoms?
>>71903167
Exactly, you get it.
>>71903217
>>71903237
i loved the 2nd half of GOF.
first part was cringy, especially the entrance of foreign students.
>>71903320
yea that part was bad it would have been worse if they left in the deleted scene of dumbledore leading everyone to sing. i enjoy the second half as well everyone around the yule ball and after. its not bad its just not as well done as the others, really good climax
>>71903211
Well, that is the point of a /tv/ discussion board.
>>71903211
90% of the board actually talks about nothing, not including capeshit.
>>71903293
>Abortus
>>71903309
her boobs are pretty nice too.
>>71903421
She is fine as fuck. Love HBC.
>>71895657
>Who's in charge of the school rules at Hogwarts?
Dimbledore
>What would've happened to Harry if he simply refused to participate in the Triwizard Tournament?
He would have been beaten until he surrendered to the binding magicial contract
>Would he have been cursed? Expelled?
just beaten and malnourished
>Why does whoever gets their name tossed into the Goblet of Fire absolutely HAVE to take part in the tournament?
binding magical contract
*any student*
**only those over the age of 17 circa. 1994**
>What if someone just threw Dumbledore's name into the fire?
hes not a student so the goblet would ignore it and burn it
>>71903421
What the hell? I remembered her flat as board from the fight club. What happened?
>>71896344
>duplication spell on money
wow
>>71903151
I'll never forget watching Deathly Hollows part 1 with my friends during opening night
>me and 7 other guys from Hs are watching the flick, it's pretty decent we sort of crack jokes here and there
>we get some glances from the die hard fans and we stop for a bit
>Dolby is hurt protecting Potter is about to die, everyone in the theater is on the verge of breaking out in tears, place is fucking silent
>then Dolby says "At least Dolby can die around his friends and master Potter" and dies
>not a split second later my friend Ron starts busting out laughing and yells "Fucking Faggot"
>"when we come to club, all eyes on us"
>everyone is now glaring at my friend whi is now left alone as we ditch him from a couple rows up in the theater
>a minute later a couple ushers come to grab Ron, who decides to be a dick and points at us and says "what about my friends" which lead the other usher to guide us down the exit
thanks Ron
>>71903457
She had kids.
>>71903465
that sounds like a personal problem. also dh1 is the second best in the series
>>71903457
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHX-noTPzpc
>>71903506
hnnng
>>71903506
she is the example of "Crazy Pussy".
>>71895657
why is Slytherin even allowed to exist? It is clearly an evil institution and undermines Hogwarts.
>>71903579
Ambitious does not equals to evil.
>>71903506
her face now kinda looks like keira
and...
>>71903603
Helena was hotter.
She has been hot through her entire life, and I still would her right now over any other woman on the planet.
>>71903465
Ron just wanted to be kicked out with his friends
fucking faggot
Could they not just make a gatling turret with like 6 wands in and have a loudspeaker repeating spells over and over and just mow cunts down with rapid fire death?
>>71903611
im not trying to get into fight but emma has been a complete semen spunkbunk always
but lets not get into a fight, they are both hot
>>71903643
thats probably the best she has ever looked
I wish more women would understand that less = more with make up and everything
>>71903643
I agree with you that Emma has as well, and they are. No need to argue.
>>71903643
emma will age horribly.
>>71903679
cool beans.
>>71903684
and here we go. she still looks 17. lets wait and see shall we
>>71903700
i like emma, but she doesn't look 17.
>>71903709
theres a candid photo i would post but jannies will end up banning me or deleted the thread, shes pretty qt and same looking in the face to me and in sed pic which was from
also she took a video of herself last month on her facebook with little makeup, she doesnt look that old, she was getting harassed at airports the last couole years
>>71903745
link it and delete the post afterwards
What would you do?
Yes, yes. Well done J.K. Rowling. Well done.
HOWEVER
>>71903745
link the picture and delete the post.
>>71903927
stalk seoirse, drink it then talk to her
>>71903979
Similar but for Helena
>>71903927
rape
Why in fucks name are the teachers part of houses?
Snape is clearly the worst offender. "Oh look, a kid from Hufflepuff just slipped over I guess that's 400 points from Hufflepuff :^)"
"Good job, Slytherin child, you put a bat's ear into the cauldron. 637 points to Slytherin"
>>71900403
That is pretty much the plot of the sixth book. Voledmort was born because his mother used mind control magic and raped a muggle.
>>71903465
I was sad when my Dolby headset died too.
>>71904074
>Snape takes 5 points from Gryffindor every single day just because Hermione actually wants to answer his loaded questions
>>71904481
more like snape takes 5 points from gryffindor because hermoine doesn't want his hot load
>>71896292
based
>>71896421
>no citizen bane
>>71904481
and then gandalf just gives 250+ points because he loves Gryffindor's dick
>>71899777
maybe wizard society isnt full of pussies that bubble wrap everything, wait brits nvm
>>71895657
im so glad this shit series is over the last 2 books where painfully shit and the last 2 movies even moreso.
it started crossing into twilight territory as well.
I dunno i feel like it should just end here why the fuck is rowling writing more hp books? Its just going to end up shit and then get a 'modern'
adaptation like the hobbit and now we have this cringey creatures wonderful faggoty fuckwhit shit with predictable shoehorn sjw crap shoved in there.
i grew up with this series as a kid and i grew out of it pretty quick by the time i was a middle teen it was pretty much unwatchable/readable
>>71903457
Puberty.
>>71907752
>so glad this shit series is over.
I have some bad news for you, anon...
Anyone else remember the Anon that would post links to fanfics in every single Harry Potter thread with an image like this?
I miss him ;_;
>>71908045
I miss him too. The list is stale now.
Why didn't they just tell him to voluntarily quit at the start of each event? Fleur quit during the lake trial and during the maze trial you could forfeit with red sparks.
>>71908102
because Rowling is dumb
>>71900429
>It's a dannyboytbh gets physically angry at seeing polysyllabic words episode
They explain this in the movie. Snape suggested they use Harry as bait to see who put his name in the goblet and Dumbledore agreed.
The reason Voldemort planned on using the Triwizard Cup as the portkey was A) No witnesses B) To make Harry's death look like an accident C) Portkeys probably don't normally work in the school grounds but an exception was made for the cup
There are no plotholes in this perfect story.
>>71896344
You can maths (arithmancy) and muggle studies, we just don't hear about it because Harry takes the soft options.
Pretty sure being a wizard is the equivalent of a redill, why would you work in science if you know magic totally negates it?
Why does nobody tries to catch Sirius Black after Prisoner of Azkhaban?
The worst offender in the entire series is the time machine watch.
>>71908287
because the books are poorly adapted
>>71908353
This. Remove that one thing and they become 20% less dumb.
>>71896461
Underrated post
>>71895774
So was there going to be some kind of punishment?
"The poop, Voldemort, first we eat his poop!'
-Mad-eye Goblin
What on Earth was JK Raimi thinking?
>>71899777
I just don't even understand the rules. Why even have a game that isn't about the snitch? If catching it is an instant win. Unless you can score enough points with bludgers to win before someone catches the snitch.
>>71896421
>boyhood
lmao
>>71896292
>a-at least the books were good though
"No!"
This part always cracked me up
Even though it's pasta, what the fuck is it about HP that gets you pseudo /lit/ fags riled up? Just ignore the occasional thread and whine elsewhere. I know you guys have already reported the thread, so just leave
>>71910651
>reported the thread
for what?
>>71895657
>Who's in charge of the school rules at Hogwarts
Is this even a question? Dumbledore, he does whatever he wants however he wants
>>71910651
>occasional
not him but
i've seen more threads about this meme series in the last 6 months than I have in the past several years on this board. even in 2011 when the last one came out. i mean the OPs could be wb shills trying to get interest for the eddie tranny movie though considering >>71908976
>>71910881
> tfw Eddie is my husbando :3
Can't wait for fantastic beasts and returning to the comfy wizarding world.
>>71900012
why didn't harry notice his name wasnt moody on the marauders map?
thats how they caught pettigrew
>>71911713
I never understood why Hogwarts didn't have something like a table or wall mounted version of that map built in by the founders themselves.
Surely if you had the ability to know who was in your grounds you'd make use of it.
Why was it left until hundreds of years later for some delinquents to make such a map?
>>71911796
Yea, why didn't filch get one to catch nob heads skipping class or running around at night?
>>71910293
Literally the whole opening game of Goblet of Fire is about that. Turns out that, even with the best seeker in the world, it's really fucking hard for one guy to win a game single-handed, especially when you can get a Quaffle goal every 20 seconds if nobody is stopping you from shooting.
Having everything built around the Seeker winning the game for you is like trying to win a football game with field goals.
>>71895844
The same people who routinely let death eater sneak infiltrate the school
>>71900952
There's a gun in the first book. Uncle Vernon tries to shoot Hagrid. He misses, then Hagrid bends the barrel into a circle.
Do you honestly think it would go any better with actual wizards? Sure, if you get up in a tower you can snipe a couple of regular wizards; then an auror teleports behind you and shoves his magically enlarged dick into your asshole.
These people can teleport anywhere, turn themselves invisible or into another person, animate anything, have special spells that deliberately drive off muggles, erase and replace memories, and make walls explode with a flick of their wrist. This is not a war that is going to go well.
>>71912532
>responding to 10 hour old bait
>>71901298
>Why doesn't he just prick Harry's finger, telling him some bs why and take the blood?
Because he doesn't want the blood. He needs the blood to come back, he WANTS to make Harry scared, show all his followers that Harry is scared, then murder the boy. It's about establishing himself again. He fails to do so, and that allows the Order to keep using Harry, and encourages people like the Malfoys to not support Voldemort whole-heartedly.
>>71895657
He wanted to. Harry's a little shit who actually craves for attention.
>>71912657
Hey there Snivellus
>>71903293
Fetus Deletus
>>71908102
Because Harry's a teenager.
The only thing worse than having Harry compete is having Harry not prepare anything because he is told to quit every event, then day of he stands there for 3 minutes while all the kids heckle the shit out of him, and he decides to do it anyways and gets his ass beat.
>>71911796
> He wants a wizarding NSA
It's immoral to watch everyone at all times. They'd know who's fucking who, who has no friends and spends all day in the dorm, private stuff.
>>71912363
Kinda unrelated, but did anybody think that game was bullshit?
>two professional sports teams
>one gets so hopelessly dominated by the other that 250 extra points at the end of the game can't help them
I mean, regular goals were worth like what 5 points each? How is a team of professional players this hopelessly bad that they let another team score 40-50 times on them without responding?
She should have made this a game between kids or something if she wanted to make that point about the snitch.
>>71912165
He's the janitor. He just takes the role of 'asshole rules lawyer' on himself, because he's upset his magic dick is too small to work and he hates the kids who actually have a future.
>>71913197
So just use it when the situation for it to be used it called for.
I don't know, give each head of house a key for it, and the headmaster, something like that.
>>71895657
>Who's in charge of the school rules at Hogwarts?
There's a board of governors, but must rules are overseen by the Headmaster or Headmistress.
>What would've happened to Harry if he simply refused to participate in the Triwizard Tournament?
>Would he have been cursed? Expelled?
I think cursed, though it's likely just something that ensured he'd be in the competition whether they wanted him to be there or not. Think about how Felix Felicis brought Harry around to what he wanted to do even though he wandered off down to Hagrid's.
>Why does whoever gets their name tossed into the Goblet of Fire absolutely HAVE to take part in the tournament?
Magical contract, see above?
>What if someone just threw Dumbledore's name into the fire?
I think the competition is strictly for students, but if there was some workaround, he'd have to compete.
>>71911713
I'm re-reading now so maybe I'll find out. So far he hasn't looked at the map, but I expect with another Barty Crouch wandering around the school, he wouldn't have noticed.
>>71911796
>Why was it left until hundreds of years later for some delinquents to make such a map?
Because nobody but delinquents considered it necessary? Even they only used it to hide from teachers and prefects.
Been a while since I watched the movies, what happened with the Malfoy family? I remember Lucius being some kind of hot shot Death Eater and then next thing I know he looks like a cucked Theoden.
>>71913349
>Because nobody but delinquents considered it necessary?
Yeah because a map that shows who is currently inside your school is so useless to people who run said school. Right.
>>71913247
Isn't their keeper taken out so they have little chance of protecting themselves?
Also it's 10 regular points, snitch is only 150, not 250.
>>71913247
150 points, the goals are 10 points each, and I think she set it up deliberately to tell the retards who whine about the Snitch being the only important thing how team sports work, and why Harry isn't all that great on his own.
Bulgaria had a great Seeker, but a fairly mediocre everything else. Meanwhile, the Irish had a great team of Chasers, who could outscore Bulgaria and get the team over the line before Krum did his shit.
As for generally 'how is a professional team getting BTFO like that', https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blowout_(sports)
Or just watch the Olympics. 2014 ice hockey, Slovenia beats Austria 4-0, Sweden beats Solvenia 5-0, Canada beats Sweden 3-0. Shit happens.
>>71896292
>>71896421
Lmao, these pictures are the fucking saddest, most pathetic shit I've ever seen in my life, and I actively dislike Harry Potter.
>>71911713
He does notice
If I remember he goes to check it out because he sees it says bartemius crouch but he knows Crouch is meant to be too sick to even attend the tournament
He scopes it out and finds "moody" (who was stealing ingredients for polyjuice potion) hanging around.
He asks him about it and I think moody implies the map might be wrong or something? Then he bargains to get the map off of harry once he realises it shows true names
>>71913374
They acted as loyal servants pre-fall, then denied everything.
When Voldy returned they had no choice but to come back to his side and hope to be forgiven. Then Malfoy lead a crew at the end of OOTP that got BTFO and lost the prophecy Voldemort wanted. To make thinkgs worse, at some point Volds found out that Malfoy senior gave away his old school diary (Horcrux), so the Malfoy's standing grew worse and worse and worse. As punishment, Dravo was tasked with the impossible - killing Dumbledore. Also Voldemort probably knew that they were never truly loyal, just opportunists who liked feeling superior about themselves. Malfoys are the worst shits in the series and they got away with it again when Volds was finally defeated because of Narzissa.
But
>mfw Voldemort got BTFO by motherly love ONCE AGAIN when Narzissa lied about Harry being dead in the final battle
Poor guy, if only his momma had loved him enough.
>>71913392
Considering that the castle is wrapped with all kinds of magical protections, and the only time people manage to sneak in is when a student inside uses a powerful magic artifact (which he only managed to do because a teacher was helping him, which only happened because the headmaster told him to do so).
They don't need to know where everyone is exactly in the school at all times, just like how our schools don't have security cameras covering every square inch and RFID sensors tracking all the kids (though I'm sure there's some ghetto American school that is like that, because they have drug deals in math class and shootings three times a week).
>>71913247
>How is a team of professional players this hopelessly bad that they let another team score 40-50 times on them without responding?
Brazil vs Germany world cup finale was 7-1 or something, pretty similar. It's also more like 20 times, not 40 or 50.
How are we feeling about the new movie on the way?
>>71913247
>>71913597
Final score is 170-160. The Bulgarian defense fell apart, but they still almost managed a draw. It's said that Krum ended the game as soon as possible once he realised that his team was pants.
http://harrypotter.wikia.com/wiki/1994_Quidditch_World_Cup
>>71913392
Odds are that the Headmaster can probably see what's going on anyway from his office.
Consider all the portraits. It's been shown that aside from other depictions of themselves, people in paintings can go among one another within the same building. Dumbledore pretty much always knew what was going on in the school.
Except with the Marauders, but that was before he was Headmaster..
An argument could be made against this with Dippet not knowing about Tom Riddle, but I think most of the things he did were outside the ordinary view - the Chamber of Secrets was in a bathroom, where likely no headmaster could see (not even portraits in there), and sure, this makes a point to your argument on the surface, but then we start to consider breaches of privacy.
>>71913476
I think you pretty much have it. Bulgaria had Krum, but Ireland had the rest of their team. The best Krum could hope for was to end it on his terms, and not make the defeat any worse.
![tumblr_mqpifljNP61sxviy0o1_250[1].gif](https://i.imgur.com/8D42qrm.gif "tumblr_mqpifljNP61sxviy0o1_250[1].gif")
>>71896292
>MIDDLE-TIER
>Ulysses
>Clifford for President
>>71900012
Theres no canon consequence for not participating once your name is drawn.
I would guess it would leave you physically or mentally impaired in some way, as its meant to be a binding magical contract for such a highly prestigious event.
>>71897814
There was variables but that's why Not-Moody is there to carry harry through the tournament as much as he can
>>71913628
Cautiously optimistic, might be a soulless cash grab but nothing can be worse than The Cursed Child, right?
>>71913349
>Magical contract, see above?
No one has explained why a magical contract means you have to other than that it has the word magic in it.
"Oh anon, why do I have to let you fuck me?"
"Why do I have to let you withdraw 6 mil from someone elses account."
If you can force someone into a contract without their knowing and against their will just bs a contract to make Voldamort kill himself. What makes it so stupid is that it's so poorly described with such poor perimeters it is literally and obviously just JK Rowling trying to find a way for Harry to compete when he doesn't want to. Rather than orchestrating things so it happens in a good way she just invents something to get around the shitty situation she wrote herself into. She's as bad as the bronze age super hero comic writers that would just make up powers for superman as he needed them.
>>71913698
>Dumbledore pretty much always knew what was going on in the school
So why didn't he know about Moody from the start? Or anything else for that matter?
>>71914438
The only other magical contract we know about is the unbreakabe vow, where you die if you break it.
Idk I thought it made sense at the time. You can't just force someone into it, Crouch jr had to ruse the goblet in a complicated manner so that Harry could compete iirc. Used confusion-spells and shit so the goblet didn't even remember the proper amount of schools.
But yeah it's pretty shitty in retrospect.
>>71895844
This is a school where Dumbledore kept a rabid dog monster locked behind a door that could be broken into with a simple unlocking spell, and the grounds has a tree that will murder you and a forest full of giant spiders
>>71902480
Are you shitting me
>>71916093
He's probably right by sheer numbers alone. Literally everybody I know in my age group except for two people has read HP.
>>71916189
how many of the empire's elite do you think read Kipling? And since publication?
