ITT: Times you've acted like the joker
>>71490208
piss offjust then kekekekehohohe
Convinced a woman on omegle to kill herself using only Joker lines.
Bitch must have never seen the movies.
I once took my while eating watermelon to kill the seen.
>>71490208
made a pencil disappear. Up my @*#hole
got dubs and derailed a thread
I was filming some movie with David Ayer and I kept going to the toilet without washing my hands. Lmao he got so freaked he said he couldn't direct if he kept doing it. I'm so random.
>>71490208
I ate my mother's chocolate when she didn't allowed us to do so, and then blamed my little brother.
She scolded him for being little brat, even though he said he didn't do it.
Post something that is a complete lie on a japenese King Pao chicken Pedo fantasy world as something that actually happend
>>71490208
So what are we going for here? Times we have offered people sadistic choices?
Nothing comes to mind, frankly. I guess I am just not a psychopath in real life.
>>71491245
Sure is summer in here.
>mom asks me if I've seen her keys
>I tell her to check downstairs even though I just saw them in the upstairs bathroom
>she believes me and looks downstairs for another 20 minutes
Not really a joker but me and this Asian dyel at the gym play this little game. There's this dyel asian with a little dick who is so small it just pisses me off. Not really a joker but I have this prank I'll do to him sometimes. I watched him enter his combination into his combo lock a couple of times. Once I got his code, I'm off to the games. What I do is I wait until he grabs his towel and goes to shower. Then I'll take all of his clothes and walk out to my car and put them all in my trunk. I've done this so many times my trunk is full of like a weeks worth of dyel asian clothes. Next I walk back and find a spot to watch with a good view. Lol then he has to walk out of the lockerroom in just a towel and leave the gym through the lobby. Bonus points if he's late for work after an early morning session. I'm always out in the lobby sitting on the couch laughing my ass off when he comes out. I think he knows it's me because every time I'm always there laughing but he hasn't said shit to me. Guess he is a sore loser that he loses our game.
>>71490208
>mom asks me to clean room
>say I'll do it
>don't
All part of the plaaaaaan...
When I was a kid, I was at a department store with my parents and was playing some Busy World of Richard Scarry game that was at a demo kiosk thing. Another kid came up and asked if he could have a turn. I said no and spent the next fifteen minutes playing it. I saw the kid and his parents leave before I finished. I still don't regret it.
>>71490208
Bathroom joker masterrace reporting in. Run that bitch. I've been doing this social experiment to see who is alpha and who is beta in my work bathroom. Turns out 99% of my office is beta. What I do is I'll purposefully leave my shit in the toilet and not flush after I'm done. I think I've had maybe only one or two wanna- be batmans actually say something to me. Everyone else just deals with it. Some even flush them for me. If this social experiment has taught me anything it's that most people are intimidated by authoritative figures and will do almost anything to avoid confrontation followed immediately by pain administrated by said authoritative figures.
>mfw I see beta dyels flush my shit like the cockroaches they are.
I was going to post something, but you'd never believe me.
>>71490208
>walking to gym
>accidentally step in dog shit
>walk into gym
>wipe it all over asian dyel in tank top
>he's like "WHAT FUCK? WHAT MATTER WIF YOU??"
>put hands on hips, turn my head sideways and in my Steve urkel voice I shout out "uh oh, did I do that?"
>smile and walk away
>>71493366
>that pasta
Kek
>>71490208
I once fought and very nearly killed the Bat Man
>>71490208
I went to the midnight premiere of The Dark Knight rises in Aurora, Colorado and left in handcuffs.
>>71493546
lmao
>be in mcdonalds
>order 5 happy meals
>leave without eating the food or taking the toys
Heh...people say I'm a little....odd
>>71490208
>look mom, I posted it again
>>71494237
Greetings reddit.
>>71490208
I stabbed a nigger with a pencil in class. Got suspended, but worth it.
>>71490208
> Order McDouble
> Throw out second patty
>>71490208
Me and my boys showed up to the boneyard to do some squats and there was this dyel asian kid on our rack squatting like 95lbs. We all approached him and he started to pack up all of his stuff but I stopped him and said "Oh nah it's okay bud, you can work in with us." Then I loaded up a couple of plates on each side, smirked and said "Better yet, why don't we work in with you??" He looked confused and nervous. I nodded at one of my boys and he loaded up 3 more plates on one side. I picked up the dyel kid and put him on the bar ass first on the other side (he weighs roughly 135lbs) and me and my bros took turns squatting him for reps. A couple of qt cardio bunnies walked by and were laughing their asses off watching him go up and down. He looked like he was actually getting a workout, he was sweating like crazy. Haven't seen him since. Guess he isn't a joker fan.
>>71493546
/fit/izen plz go, this isn't a gym bully thread
>>71490208
> 2008
> Obsessed with scars
> Buy knife
> Play Joker'so theme on iPad 24/7
> Play it in car while driving
> When I stop at green lights and someone success up next to be I look them in the eyes and all, "Do you know how I got these scars? "
> Drive off like a mad man
> Hang out at Spencer Gifts
>>71494807
Big P's gonna have fun with this one.
>>71494829
> When I stop at green lights and someone success up next to be I look them in the eyes and all, "Do you know how I got these scars? "
>wrap a rubber band around the sink's hose to keep the trigger squeezed
>put it back in its holder aimed forward
>Mom goes out into the kitchen and turns the sink on
>hear spraying and screams
Fucking bitch.
>>71496803
THAT'S NOT MY IMAGE
hello
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXlzWhBvYwg
tanked the US economy
>Bought a vest and suit pant akin to Joker's apparel
>Studied his mannerisms and the clicking noise he did with his mouth in TDK
>decide to go to Austin, TX to their "6th street" which is just a street of different bars
>wearing my new clothes
>start of the night modestly, but get a couple shots in me and start to realize this is my chance to be the joker
>see a girl sitting by herself in the corner
>approach her
>slam my hand as hard as I could on the table in front of her
>she's startled
>I pick up my hand to reveal of Joker playing card
>in my best Joker voice I said "Isn't life funny? Sometimes, you are alone, and then someone unexpected comes along and TURNS YOUR WORLD UPSIDE DOWN!!!"
>I pick her up by her ankles and stand on the chair holding her upside down
>everyone is stoic and don't know what to do
>I lick her feet and say "just like a bat... hanging upside down. A bat... yes, batman."
>security comes and tackles me
>I drop that bitch
>got arrested, but at least she finally understand life through my eyes
>>71490208
I did this.
>>71490743
Dastardly?
>Why so not covered in shit?
The joker, he's got no rules.
>>71490208
>Do you wanna know how I got these scars?
>>71490208
>>71494829
FBI here.
