>alone at your house on the middle of nowhere
>*phone rings*
>"hello anon, do you like scary movies"?
What do?
"No nigga, stop calling me"
>hang up, go about business as usual
>ignore any more phone calls
>>70575669
>pull out mobile phone
>call police
Too bad we'll never see the old 'cutting the phone line' trope in horror again
>>70575785
Simply set your horror film in a remote location with no mobile signal.
i thought every american house had a gun?
WHAZZUP?
>I only enjoy horror kino. Don't ever call my house again you uncultured faggot
Don't call the police on my mobile phone. Run up the stairs where there's no way out of the house. Make a sassy pop-culture reference or two.
>>70575669
start a /tv/ discussion and explain in crucial detail why the thing is the only good horror movie
call the other person pleb no matter what they say and refer to myself as a true patrician
also claim sarah michelle gellar in scream 2 as your waifu
>>70575669
Engage in conversation, and use my superior /tv/ intellect to thoroughly explain why every movie he likes is shit. The killer will then be so depressed that he commits suicide.
>>70575966
https://soundcloud.com/drizzywap/shitposting
>>70575669
WAZZZZZZUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPP
>>70575669
>At home alone as 12 year old me
>Parents had just split up
>Watching Scream™ on VHS to pass the hours while mom's at work
>The phone rings
>On TV Sydney is getting her first spooky call herself
>I pick up the phone
>Ghostface is talking on TV now
>A gravelly voiced man speaks into my ear "Is your mom home?"
>I panic and throw the phone
Turns out my mom's new boyfriend had worked as a logger and once set the choker poorly and it slipped and crushed his throat. He pretty much sounded just like Ghostface. He was also an abusive prick. Good stuff.
>>70575669
No I don't, don't ever call me or my wife's son again
>>70576107
>I panic and throw the phone
>>70575669
no not really
>>70575854
Where's that, grandpa?
>>70575669
Yes. *Grabs AR-15* and my blade proof autism armor that I bought through the recommendation of /k/
>Trying to kill Autismos
Good luck.
>>70576840
I can think of a few places in lake country in MN where cell service is spotty at best. Even with Verizon.
>>70575669
I sure do
>>70575669
"I could say I'm a fan, yes. What are some of your favorites? I really enjoyed the Babadook and the Poughkeepsie Tapes, since they rely on actual suspense and cinematography to give the audience that feeling of dread. I am not, however, a fan of films that rely on cheap jumpscares and gore to try and be 'scary', such as Paranormal Activity and the Saw films (Although the first one was a good crime/suspense film, I might add). In short, a good horror film is one which keeps your eyes glued to the screen because you genuinely fear and care for the protagonist's life."
>>70575669
I ask him what happened to Richie
>>70575976
If the killer knows the house, he'll be hiding upstair knowing you'll come there.
>>70575669
Begin to heave my supple breasts heavily then question who would ask me such a question at this hour
>>70575669
Damn it Joe ! stop calling my house Im banging your 21 year old daughter you idiot and stop dressing up like a retarded ghoul dumbass.
>>70575669
>picking up the phone
>ever
rofl. maybe if its a skypecall
>>70575785
>>70575854
"you're next" had a neat idea of using a cell jammer... they even explained it in the movie by saying any retard can buy one online for cheap to piss off or troll people. guess what? you can and they are pretty cheap (only a few hundred bucks for a decent one).
>>70575669
I liked Paranormal Activity it sho shcary><
>>70575669
>Dont call me or my house ever again
"do you want to talk to my mommy?"
>>70575669
I wouldn't even answer the phone, just let it go to voicemail.
>>70578323
>ALL MY LIFE I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THE MAGIC
you're next is great btw
>>70578323
Just a note. If you do use one of these to block cell phone calls the FCC will rape your ass and then send you to a Federal "pound me in the ass" penitentiary.
>>70579396
>murderer cares about breaking the law
>>70575669
>yeah jaws had me scared of the water for a long time. Is this a survey or something lol
>>70579324
I've been looking for the magic
>>70575669
>Indeed I do, my good Sir! "Horror" is my cinematic genre of preference.
>>70575669
Ask if him and the vacuum are still a couple.
>>70575669
>phone rings
>hold my breath and stare at it not blinking until it stops
>continue shitposting
>>70575669
I don't pick up unknown numbers. He'd have to text.
>>70575669
My crippling social anxiety includes the inability to answer phones
see who it is on caller ID, credits roll.
>>70575669
I would ace whatever fucking horror movie quiz the dipshit decided to pull from buzzfeed or whatever and sling at me. Then he'd have to just kill me anyway, and when he came into my house, I'd be hiding in the corner with my fucking pistol pointed at the door in the dark.
>>70581050
>I would ace whatever fucking horror movie quiz the dipshit decided to pull from buzzfeed or whatever and sling at me
Not exactly something to be proud of.
>>70575717
Would ironically be my response
>>70580904
this
