Cannes
http://www.canalplus.fr/pid3580-live-tv-clair.html
First for Dolan, confirmed for greatest auteur of our generation
>Guy Lodge @GuyLodge now 13 seconds ago
The journalists in the press room have predictably little time for Dolan's tears. Lots of mocking mewling noises going around the crowd.
holy shit mel
My heart is racing. Hold me pls
MEL
MEL
COME BACK
FUCKING HATE IT WHEN THEY GIVE AN AWARD TO TWO GUYS REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
BASED MEL COMING UP
>no Palm for based verhoeven
>>69870132
>prochain rendez vous demain
>salut les terriens
what do they mean by this?
Mel will tell the Frenchies to fuck off and give the leaf to Refn
>>69870197
Fuck you iranian hoe. Fuck you dunst fuck you miller rrrrrreeeeeeeeee
>>69870168
I want a video of that.
REFN WON HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Palme d'or for Loach
>>69870168
>Justin Chang @JustinCChang now1 minute ago Cannes, France
>@vicciho It's atrocious. But everyone is relieved he didn't win the Palme.
MADS
A
D
S
hahahaha...
HAHAHHAAHAHAH
hahahahahaha
KILL ME
I
L
L
M
E
Sierranevada SNUBBED
Dheepan doesn't look so bad now.
SEAN PENN AND REFN JUST DID A SUICIDE BOMBING AT THE RED CARPET HOOOOLY FUUUCK
ken loach has won jesus christ, and there were those of us who thought Dheepan was a mistake, what world we live in.
Refn just strangled Miller with his magic towel
this is it
Worst jury in years ! shame
>Muh politics
Fuck this meme festival
fuck everything
Mads and George, goddamnit I expected better
>no Refn palme
>no Dolan palme
>no Verhoeven palme
>no Von Trier running up on stage and masturbating for no apparent reason
shit year for memes
>no Toni
>no Jarmusch
is this a fucking joke?
>>69870259
>Being so fucking high
>loach
did this manage to be even worse than last year's?
Loach doing his worst french impression eu
CANNES IS A HACK
>>69870168
Holy shit Gustavo Beck just killed himself in front of all the other critics
>C'està cause de vous que l'expérience est si belle
>It's your fault the experience is so beautiful
FUCK THIS OLD FUCK. HE DISSED CANNES.
Guy Lodge @GuyLodge
The journalists in the press room have predictably little time for Dolan's tears. Lots of mocking mewling noises going around the crowd.
lol
Loach's french is so bad that even I understand every word he is saying
>>69870132
THIS IS SAFE
THIS IS PREDICTABLE
THIS IS "MUH SOCIAL REALISM"
THIS IS SHIT
REFN SHOULD DO A KANYE WEST AND TAKE THE PALME FROM LOACH'S HAND
HE'S RIGHT ON NEO-LIBERALISM THOUGH
He will won the palme the next year at this point
Cannes confirmed for dogshit, why did they even have memes such as Miller or Mikkelsen in the jury?
TERRIBLE YEAR
>neo-liberalism has brought us to near catastrophe
UK YES
Based Loach shitting on capitalists pigs
"J'ai toujours préféré la folie des passions à la sagesse de l'indifférence."
FUCKING PRETENTIOUS DOLAN.
OH FUCK LOACH GOING ON A COMMIE RANT.
>>69870168
>AwardsWatch @awards_watch 4m4 minutes ago
>Best Actress prize for Best Performance at a Cannes Closing Ceremony: Xavier Dolan #Cannes2016
1. "TONI ERDMANN" (Maren Ade) FIPRESCI Price [8.24/123 1.5]
2. "ELLE" (Paul Verhoeven) [7.94/81 1.4]
3. "PATERSON" (Jim Jarmusch) [7.38/116 1.9]
4. "SIERANEVADA" (Cristi Puiu) [7.35/112 1.6]
5. "AQUARIUS" (Kleber Mendonça Filho) [7.18/102 1.4]
6. "BACALAUREAT (Graduation)" (Cristian Mungiu) [7.03/110 1.4]
7. "RESTER VERTICAL (Stay Vertical)" (Alain Guiraudie) [6.53/120 1.6]
8. "JULIETA" (Pedro Almodovar) [6.47/120 1.7]
9. "MA LOUTE (Slack Bay)" (Bruno Dumont)
SNUBBED
kek, only the movies with shit ratings got prizes
STOP GIVING AWARDS TO FUCKING KEN LOACH YOU FUCKING FUCK FUCKS FUCKING FUCK DAMMIT FUCK
Cannes is fucking shit since Fahrenheit 9/11. I can't take this shit serious anymore, I'm fucking out.
how the fuck did they come up with these winners?
>guy living in ivory tower lectures pleb on politics
fuck off you old fart
I agree with your message loach (and while I haven't seen the films) but it doesn't mean you deserve the award.
>>69870446
>Ken Loach laying it down like it is
rightwingers' tears right now lmao
ANOTHER WORLD IS POSSIBLE YOU UNIMAGINARY DRONES
they are litteraly calling I, daniel blake the successor of Deephan
>>69870479
>In front of the most exclusive cultural event in the world
>All millionnaires
Fuck him.
holy shit poor Mel on his own someone give him a hug
Mel should've won the leaf
>>69870446
NO
I WILL NOT SANCTION THIS BUFFOONERY
No Jury Prize Award? What???
>>69870518
Dheepan got panned by real critics.
>>69870514
Worked great for China and the Soviet Union.
>>69870514
/pol/fags BTFO
>>69870571
that's my point.
>>69870564
Are you retarded? lol American Honey got it
>>69870572
you are jsut confirming you are an unimaginary drone
REFN KISSES DOLAN
as much as I hate the fact that Dolan won an award, Loach BTFO-ing /pol/ is absolutely GOAT
>>69870572
compared to what they had before, yeah
It's a fucking disaster for such a strong competition. What a waste
Cannes: The Leicester edition
>tfw you have to scroll and scroll and scroll to watch
POVERTY PORN
O
V
E
R
T
Y
P
O
R
N
This confirm that Cannes is such irrelevant as Oscars
Hold up, who won what?
>>69870737
Dolan got the Palme d'Ore
>>69870656
>>69870514
shit, I actually meant "unimaginative"
>>69870737
Refn won Elle
>>69870761
more like the Palm Bore.
>>69870761
For what movie?
>>69870132
>Dolan actually got a prize for a film panned by everyone.
Fuck this festival.
>>69870724
isn't there a Games of Thrones thread somewhere?
CANNES CONFIRMED REDDIT
>>69870737
Forushande best scenario
Shahab hosseini for best actor
best actress for Jaclyn rose
Mungiu and Assayas best director
Dolan grand priz
Loach palme d'or
>>69870846
yeah, are you gonna go back?
Dolan could bring a literal can of shit to Cannes and they'd give him an award.
>>69870460
>jarmusch
>verhoeven
I miss when these two made real movies with interesting plots, characters, and commentary. now they just regurgitate the same indie twee shit that's been stale since broken flowers
![Laurence Anyways.mkv_snapshot_01.24.15_[2014.12.19_02.46.55].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/TXcC89N.jpg "Laurence Anyways.mkv_snapshot_01.24.15_[2014.12.19_02.46.55].jpg")
Dolan will win 12 Oscars next year, just you wait
I can't believe the tweet got the winners right. Which one of the jury members blabbed?
>I love being lectured on politics and economics by a film director who knows nothing about either of those topics
-- The Jury
>>69870514
*another world is possible and necessary
>>69870943
George told Mel
>>69870943
the organizers know beforehand too
>>69870964
Loach has been making sociopolitical films since before you were born, bub.
>>69870940
This, his next movie it's American, he will crash the Oscars
What movie did Nolan win for?
>>69870943
It didn't, though.
>>69870943
It was who got invited back for the ceremony, which is usually a good indicator of who won, not what they won.
REFN IS FINISHED
It's hard to hate on Loach's ideology but that doesn't mean he makes the best film(s)
Cahiers du Cinéma @cahierscinema
Le palmarès est si surréaliste au regard de la compétition qu'on est soulagés que Sean Penn et Nicole Garcia n'aient rien obtenu #Cannes2016
Les Cahiers bringing the bantz
Dolan's literally a meme director for fucks sake
>>69870964
Stop this technocratic bullshit.
>>69870469
This one was good
>>69871064
>implying Refn wasn't the real winner
>>69871009
Being ignorant for a long time is not an achievement.
>>69871100
>she's barely legal
>>69871098
Hysterical potato propaganda
>>69871079
The Cahiers du cinéma are like the most high brow cinema publication in France. And they just panned the jury.
>>69871035
juste la fin du monde
>>69871100
pedofaggot kill yourself
>>69871100
raped
>>69871104
You are just one of the happy shitposters of the board, you never even saw a film of the man, retard.
>>69871079
kek
>>69871104
>works within communities
>researches their history
>makes films about them
how is he ignorant exactly?
>>69871100
>"I'm going to do what I did to your pussy on your face"
>"Yes"
>Refn's wife claps
Jesus
Toni Erdmann got snubbed. Bummer.
>>69871181
>le pedo
Is this the new ledit buzzword? It's appearing a lot lately
>>69871035
JUSTe la fin du monde
33% 4,9 on RT
>>69871079
Someone translate, I don't speak mudslime
>>69871100
>his wife clapping for him when he kisses a girl
>Elle turned 18 on that very day
And you guys say Refn is a beta lol
>>69871242
This would make some great fanfic.
Essential Loachcore anyone?
>Poor Cow (1967)
>Kes (1969)
>The Save the Children Fund Film (1971)
>Family Life (1971)
>Black Jack (1979)
>Looks and Smiles (1981)
>Fatherland (1986)
>Hidden Agenda (1990). Cannes Special Jury Prize.
>Riff-Raff (1991). European Film Award Best Picture
>Raining Stones (1993). Cannes Special Jury Prize.
>Ladybird Ladybird (1994)
>Land and Freedom (1995). FIPRESCI International Critics Prize; Prize of the Ecumenical Jury at the Cannes Film Festival; European Film Award Best Picture
>A Contemporary Case for Common Ownership (1995)
>Carla's Song (1996)
>The Flickering Flame (1997)
>My Name Is Joe (1998)
>Bread and Roses (2000)
>The Navigators (2001)
>Sweet Sixteen (2002)
>11'09"01 September 11 (segment "United Kingdom") (2002)
>Ae Fond Kiss... (2004)
>McLibel (2005)
>Tickets (2005), along with Ermanno Olmi and Abbas Kiarostami
>The Wind That Shakes the Barley (2006) Palme d'Or, Cannes
>It's a Free World... (2007) Screenplay Osella at 64th Venice Film Festival
>Looking for Eric (2009)
>Route Irish (2010)
>The Angels' Share (2012)
>The Spirit of '45 (2013)
>Jimmy's Hall (2014)
>I, Daniel Blake (2016)
>>69871277
RT gets cinema d'auteur very badly ; Must be a good film, promising at the very least.
Was I, Daniel Blake actually good? I haven't heard anyone talk about it before.
why did dolan win?
why does he keep getting away with it?
>>69871314
Maybe i'm a little noob folllowing this kind of festivals, but i didn't expected Dolan to win after that reception for critics
>>69871100
KING OF /tv/
>>69871358
He's the only real Millennial auteur so far, what do you expect?
>>69870970
true, I stand corrected
>>69871100
everything this man does is pure kino
>>69871310
>not a single good movie
wew
>>69871489
just leave
>>69871310
>The Wind That Shakes the Barley (2006)
>2006
>ten years ago
>>69871307
>>69871293
>>69871242
>>69871100
I don't mean this in a bad way, but Refn is an actual autist and his wife is practically his caretaker. It's not completely unthinkable that someone who likes a relationship like that would find it funny/cute if her partner would be with another woman (since nurturing and seeing how her partner reacts and evolves through it is part of the love in such a relationship).
Refn is so autistic he's alpha.
>>69871358
He's the GOAT
>>69871510
It's true, though. British cinema is the worst national cinema.
>>69871349
I don't even know you dude. I don't know what you are talking about.
>>69871310
BASED LOACH
What a great career, he deserves to have a double PDO, even though could have been for other films
>>69871602
British cinema is obviously a lot worse than the cinema of mongolia and burkina fasso.
>>69871553
if you're not being ironic, what films should I check out? Mommy?
Apparently Mads made a silly face during Dolan's speech. Any screencaps?
>>69871079
Top jej
>>69871632
Of significant film-producing countries.
>>69871728
Why is he so perfect?
>>69871665
Mommy is great, arguably his best movie. Yes, watch it.
Thoughts?
>>69871759
>Haneke
no thanks
>>69871310
Kes is the only good one.
>>69871665
He's only made like 5 films
>>69871759
Based Haneke
>>69871759
>image.png
>>69871759
>Bille August
Literally who
Otherwise all the rest are significant directors who deserve that added to their legacy, if you look at the award in a bubble and ignore who they beat
>>69871904
The real father of Anakin Skywalker
3. "LUNG BOONMEE RALUEK CHAT (Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives)" Apichatpong Weerasethakul PALME D'OR [8.62/33 1.8]
10. "The Tree of Life" Terrence Malick Palm d'Or [7.13/58 1.8]
1. "AMOUR (LOVE)" (Michael Haneke) Palme d'Or [7.83/79 1.4]
1. "LA VIE D'ADÈLE - CHAPITRE 1 & 2 (BLUE IS THE WARMEST COLOUR)" (Abdellatif KECHICHE) Palme d'Or + FIPRESCI Prize Competition [8.73/85 1.1]
7. "WINTER SLEEP (Kis Uykusu)" (Nuri Bilge CEYLAN) FIPRESCI Prize Competition + Palme d'Or [7.71/79 1.4]
31. "DHEEPAN" (Jacques AUDIARD) Palme d'Or [6.13/73 1.7]
36. "I, DANIEL BLAKE" (Ken Loach) [6.06/97 1.8]
What happened?
>>69871840
embryo as fuck
>>69871728
hannibal_planning_dinner.jpg
>>69872145
>lbg "memes"
>>69872088
Where are these ratings from?
>>69872088
They fucked up the jury
>>69872216
https://cannes-rurban.rhcloud.com/2016
>>69871358
His boypussy has been around.
>>69872251
thanks pham
>>69871759
Apocalypse Now is still the greatest palm winner of all the time
>>69871358
His next movie will win the Palme D'Or.
>>69870132
All you dummies not knowing anything about Cannes and thinking Toni Erdmann could actually win.
Reminder that this is the same Cannes that gave Michael Moore the Palme just to protest the war in Iraq.
>>69872360
Maybe the greatest, even though it's doubtful, but it isn't the best.
>>69872396
Actually it's a different Cannes. They choose a new jury every year Anon.
>>69872443
Key word there is "choose".
You think "Divines" wasn't a political choice?
You think Ken Loach wasn't a political choice?
And the old bugger really took advantage of the podium to spout his socialist rhetoric...
>>69872422
The greatest and the best, followed by Wages of Fear and Paris, Texas
What a load of crap. Dolan, Loach. Any of the awards actually went to deserving hands?
>>69871100
>just Europe things
>>69872396
>the same Cannes that gave Michael Moore the Palme just to protest the war in Iraq.
and what's wrong with that?
>>69872636
>Giving a cinema award for politics and not for cinema
Do you even art?
>>69872522
It's not the same cannes.
A new jury is chosen every year
>>69872681
do you even militant art?
and a documentary isn't art, just so you know
>>69872692
I will agree with you the day Lars Von Trier is invited to preside the Jury.
>>69872747
Men have Venice
Boys have Cannes
Children have TIFF
Autistic weeb frogposters have Sundance
>>69872088
DEY TOOKER
>>69872762
But von Trier makes shit films
Man Toni Erdmann was snubbed
>>69872856
Only Dancer in the Dark
>>69872866
Good
German 'cinema' deserves to die, next to everything related to that country
>>69872776
Do faggots get Berlin?
>>69872856
Breaking the Wave & Dancer in the Dark were not shit.
Von Trier was a pioneer: see Dogma 95.
>>69872856
Trier painting the snow with his pee has more artistic value than anything Loach ever put out.
someone in my class has a short film in this festival. I haven't seen much of their stuff but I get the impression they are basically mediocre. It's pretty funny to me honestly. I'll bet these things are filled with shit like that. Wannabe artists with no talent just sitting round jerkin each other off.
>>69872908
>see Dogma 95
A pretentious movement that was killed by its own creators?
>>69872940
>not understanding the point of the movement.
>>69872934
>being this jelly
>>69872970
>we should make intentionally bad films
>>69872940
>>69873019
>le pretentious
>fallacies because why not
The usual /tv/ intellect
>>69872905
Berlin is patrician choice
>>69872856
>Trier makes shit films
I agree mostly actually and hate that people fucking like his shit.
>>69872908
never seen Breaking the Wave but D in the D is a pretty shitty film. People just forget it is because Bjork is in it.
the only really good film he's made is the idiots. everything else ive seen has been mostly awful garbage. Meloncholia might be the worst film ive seen
>>69873019
It was a precursor to small budget film-making like Blair Witch or Irreversible.
>>69872776
TIFF is pure anti-charisma, but I can't figure out why.
>>69873089
How is making arbitrary rules about how your should make films not the very definition of pretentious?
>>69873130
It was a precursor to mumblecore cancer.
>>69873130
whats irreversible got to do with dogme 95
>>69873164
>but I can't figure out why.
its a compilation of oscarbait and cannes venice leftovers, no boos, no weird picks just soulless like canada itself
>>69872776
Cannes is still the best, though. Hipsters have Locarno.
>>69873164
It's where business is made for the majority of the movies, the fact that general audience can watch movies from all around the world during the festival makes me jelly to no end
>>69873223
I could wager Irreversible may never have seen the light of day if it weren't for Dogme95. Noé took inspiration from the idea and adapted it to his ends.
Can someone help me with worst Cannes winners list?
Literal Bad Winners (facts)
1982: Yol (Dude Director is in Jail lmao)
2001: Fahrenheit 9/11 (Dude Bush is bad lmao)
2015: Dheepan (Dude Refugees lmao)
2016: I, Daniel Blake (Dude Capitalism is dying It's 2016 lmao)
Bad Winners (Opinions)
1979: Die Blechtrommel (Dude Fuck Coppola you'll not win your 2nd alone lmao)
1980: All That Jazz (Dude this movie doesn't belong to this year but we don't give a fuck lmao)
1997: Ta'm e guilass (Dude 2/3 the movie in the same car lmao)
2010: Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives (Dude Tim Burton was on drugs that night lmao)
2013: La vie d'Adèle (Dude Homosexual relationship in the year when France didn't wanted to approve homosexual marriage lmao)
Anything to add or change?
>>69873308
Only third worlders care about Locarno
>>69873120
>hate that people fucking like his shit
>everything else ive seen has been mostly awful garbage
>Meloncholia might be the worst film ive seen
LMAO There's nothing to answer to this. If the person is so happy with his own skills with the rope let him to it
>>69873347
>Noé took inspiration from the idea
sauce?
>>69873100
>Patrician choice
>This year winner is a Rapefugees documentary at how they die in the sea please let them in
No, is fucking politics.
>>69873357
You're a child. The insanity and joyful ignorance of that deserves congratulations I suppose
>>69873357
dude memes lmao
>>69873388
don't worry I've long ago accepted the proliferation of tasteless garbage, don't let my passing lament fool you.
>>69873357
>2010: Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives (Dude Tim Burton was on drugs that night lmao)
>2013: La vie d'Adèle (Dude Homosexual relationship in the year when France didn't wanted to approve homosexual marriage lmao)
Both were the highest rated films by the critics, though.
>>69873357
>1980: All That Jazz (Dude this movie doesn't belong to this year but we don't give a fuck lmao)
A few movies every year are out in some country before the festival but not sold internationally, Elle this year was out in France for exemple.
Same thing happened with A Touch Of Zen who came out in 1971 and 1972 in two parts I think but was later re-cut and shown in 1975 in cannes
>>69873357
The Mission is the worst Palme d'or winner that I've seen. Sappy score, De Niro acts like he's doesn't want to be there, and loads of "muh poor natives" politics.
ahah the jury got booed by the journalists at the press conference after the ceremony
>>69873357
>1980: All That Jazz (Dude this movie doesn't belong to this year but we don't give a fuck lmao)
thats a terrible opinion anon
the movie is fantastic
>>69873357
You can fuck people of the same gender without marrying them you know
Just because we don't have fag marriage doesn't mean we hang fags from bridges
>>69873357
>2010: Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives (Dude Tim Burton was on drugs that night lmao)
What? That was one of the most based choices in Cannes history.
>>69873582
rightly so
>>69873357
what an awful post
>>69873357
1994: Pulp Fiction
richard brody / rosenbaum opinions when
>>69872934
Are you from Philly by chance? I worked on set for a short thats showing at Cannes this year and i think hes only a couple years removed from school
>>69873779
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qk9xO85vg7w
>le scandal!
>>69873357
>1997: Ta'm e guilass (Dude 2/3 the movie in the same car lmao)
this is the only good winner in recent years.
>>69873900
Tarantino makes me think of an actor here.
>>69872989
not even. More people online have already seen my shit than people will even see their thing anyway.
>>69873900
Made me think, does every single nominee prepare a speech every single year?
Though they probably have people to do that for them
any winners so far?
>>69874395
Refn won the Palm
Dolan won the Queer Palm
>>69874395
Refn won Most Pedo.
What did Farhadi say about MAD MAX? Any French speaking anon can tell us?
>>69874395
everybody lose
>Cannes journos: "Here are 4-6 great films!"
>Folks at home: "We certainly hope so!"
>Cannes jury: "We are < 9% in alignment with that!"
>>69874712
everyone loved the Loach tho.
>>69874712
wut
What did he mean by this
REFN WON ?
Well, now that I think about it thé movie was good but really disturbing. Especially the necrophilia scene
>>69874732
No the didn't. It got pretty middling reviews, especially compared to the Ade, Jarmusch, and Veerhoven
Based Mungiu just gave a lesson to all the fuck-tards in his post award press conference, basically acknowledging that the best films did not receive any awards.
>>69874794
>lol hijabs are great
Jihadis could have done Bataclan 2.0 on these idiots and they'd still have their heads up their asses
>>69874794
>a woman finally made a very good film, possibly the best film in the competition
>give her nothing
Sexist.
>>69874915
>Trump supporters actually believe this
>>69874977
>a woman finally made a very good film,
>finally
lol embryo
So who won the palme d'or in the end ?
>>69875110
refn
>>69875110
Why ask this board? Just google, nigger. Plus, you won't care
apparently george miller's favorite was toni erdmann so don't blame this shit show on him
>>69875110
Communist grandpa Ken Loach, who also made a plea in favour of socialism during his victory speech.
>>69875110
The jews.
>>69875200
of couse he would say that now, get ready for all of them to talk about how shit their time on the jury was and they were the only one fighting for the good films
>>69875148
>>69875192
Because I was at the cinema watching The Neon Demon. I thought thé movie was good and really fucking creepy. The music and visuals were perfect
So is no one gonna talk about how Farhadi won two awards for his worst received film to date??
