>character gets out of bed
>perfect hair, visibly clean teeth, perfect skin, no sand in his eyes
>character takes a piss
>doesn't dab his wiener on the weewee sponge
>>67649713
>character wipes his ass
>doesn't wet the paper
>character zones out at a stop light then snaps back into reality when the cars behind him start honking their horns
>>67649673
>character gets out of bed
>bed is completely dry, there isn't any piss or shit or blood in it
>character gets out of bed
>sho dee ragging my sister in the arsehole again
>war movie
>character is fighting for several days
>he's perfectly shaved every single time.
>>67649673
>makeup already applied
>bra on
>>67649713
>weewee sponge
Is that the poor people version of the weewee vacuum?
>character has nightmare
>jolts up from bed, covered in sweat, and looks straight ahead while breathing heavily
>>67649673
>Character wakes up.
>Doesn't wear pajamas or socks.
>character wakes up
>isn't on a bed of hay in his cuckshed
>Character gets out of bed
>Sho Dee tells me to go back to bed until he says i can come down stairs
>>67649895
>>67650186
>>67650251
Who is this semen demon?
>character wakes up
>both of his arms aren't asleep and waggling around like dead sausages
>semen demon
No need to get personal anon
>>67650357
where does one find a live sausage?
>character wakes up
>he gets on my BAD SIDE
>tell him to not make this personal
>>67650274
Everything you aren't, cuck.
>>67650384
In my pants.
>character wakes up
>next to the cum splattered body of my sister
>the one with tits like the sides of a lit candle, that is
>ywn have an autistic brother who smells your panties
>>67650463
Mmm Mmm
>>67650532
That's some low hanging fruit.
Also what the hell are you fags talking about?
>>67650600
Aren't you in on the latest meme? It's Slimey Sam, the sister sniffing film cricket
>character gets out of bed
>they have their socks on
>character wakes up
>his wife's son's mother has blocked him on whatsapp again
>>67650636
Nope, I just woke up after going on a drinking binge last night.
>dosen't know about Slimey Sam the fastest sniffer in Quedgely
>>67649673
>sand in eyes
What
>Character has a bowel movement
>The toilet isn't filled with dark red blood
>>67650682
Hey, I just marathoned a beer, feeling a little buzz.
>characters have sex
>the girl leaves her bra on
>the guy doesn't immediately send me to my cuckshed
>>67649673
>Movie takes place before oral care/hygiene was a thing
>everyone has perfectly straight white teeth
>wake up at 4 in the afternoon
>walk downstairs, can hear ebonics protruding from the dining room
>get distracted by it, fall over
>doesn't hurt because no chin to fall on anyway
>go into the dining room
>half the table is my family, the other half are some chocolate people, one of them pipes up
>"bo fiddy wizzle shapoopy mup fup muhfugga?"
>I reply "yeah I can't believe we're finishing above Arsenal this season, its the highlight of my life"
>notice the middle of the table doesn't have food on it
>it's Sho Dee and my sister fucking like pigs in the centre
>dad is masturbating furiously
>mfw
Someone link me to slimy sam's origin story.
>>67650532
Would bang. What's her fucking problem, will she let me nut?
>>67650887
Do you work as a guard at Buckingham palace?
>It's a Sho Dee and Hair Boy combine to become Super Bull in Law episode
>>67650966
I sell cocaine and cocaine accessories.
>character coughs
>there is no small shower of blood droplets
>character wakes up
>hears a faint mup da doo didda in the distance
>ventures out of his cuckshed to tend to Sho Dee's needs
>this guy balls deep in his other sister
Classic Samkino
GODDAMN IT WILL YOU FAGGOTS TELL ME WHO THIS PERSON IS OR LINK ME TO THE ORIGINAL THREAD SO I CAN MEEM WITH YOU WHAT THE FUCK?!
>>67650725
Dark red blood isn't as bad as black blood, meaning the wound isn't as far into the bowels.
Not sure why I know this
>>67651132
>he isn't aware of the Slimey Sam database
Plen
>>67651132
Slimey Sam invites black men and members of the Queen's Guard to fuck his sisters.
Don't have a picture of the Buckingham Palace employee sorry.
>Character has interracial in laws
>Doomed to chocolate people at all future family gatherings
>character steps out of bed
>he doesnt knock over empty beer bottles and step in vomit
>>67650723
Not literal sand
>>67650845
>this meme
>characters impulsively start making out for the first time while they were doing something underlates
>the woman doesn't say "fill your squishie with your cummies daddy <3"
>>67651212
Can you explain this shit to me? Is this guy Slimey Sam? What the fuck is going on?
>>67650723
>he doesn't live in the desert
>>67651298
No that's an innocent bystander.
>>67651166
Well you're kinda wrong senpai, the darker the blood the more digested it has been, so the earlier in the GI tract the source of the bleed is.
That doesn't bear much relation to the severity of any bleed. You could have a pretty nasty peri-anal bleed, lose pints of blood and the blood would be bright red.
>Look Daddy! Isn't Sho's cock big!!
>MMAAAAAAHHHHHH!! ... the chins of slimey sam have always been celebrated for their thinness
>>67651298
>Mistaking Slimey Sam for Peter 'Left my card at home' Steele
goddamn it what the fuck is this meme
someone explain it to me
The fuck is going on?
>>67651437
Goddamn it source me on the story behind this so I can fuck his mom and sisters.
>SAM GET DOWN HERE, SHO DEE NEEDS A FLUFFER AND ITS A TWO MAN JOB!
>>67651484
>>67651492
>not knowing the slimey sam meme
Do you want to know the slimey sam meme?
>>67651484
>>67651492
>>67651495
Looks like some twelve year old bong faggot got rekt by the ugly bong faggot from the pictures and got his information somehow and is now posting his personal pics. Bongs gonna subhuman.
>Bong woman is into a guy with brown skin
How surprising.
>bull-in-law going to the Bull Ring
P O T T E R Y
>when your bull takes to the bull ring
P O T T E R Y
O
T
T
E
R
Y
>>67649673
>character goes to the bathroom
>he doesn't put a box in front of the toilet so he can lift up his legs to simulate the natural squatting position that makes it easier to squeeze out a turd
It's like these movies aren't even written by real humans.
>>67651598
B R A V O S L I M E Y
i cannot explain how mad i am that you people haven't goddamn explained this to me
>>67651648
This to be honest family
>>67651634
>Not always having perfect not too soft not too hard shits that slide right out with no pushing
It's like you don't live on a healthy diet of pasta, pizza, and cheeseburgers.
D EE'S
D RAMATIC
L ENGTH
>>67649673
do you live in the desert?
>mfw they don't know about the Slimey Sam meme
>>67651751
>mfw I just found his sister on Facebook and I'm about to blow this shit wide open
You can't hide the memes from us.
>"loser character"
>has an apartment, a car and friends
>>67651795
Nice
>>67651795
Oh fuck.
>when you have a metal concert at 4 but your a cuck at 3
>>67651857
Are all British families given a bull now or do they have to ask for one?
>>67651911
Slimey Sam wants that to be reality but he doesn't have time to campaign for it, too busy learning chocolate people language.
>>67651911
they're rationed for the fact that they have about a fifth of the percentage as burgers do
>>67651795
S L I M E Y
L
I
M
E
Y
>>67651911
You get one when you pay your TV license m8.
>>67651911
Why do you think we pay a tv licence to the BBC m8
>Slimey Sam thread
>No one posted this guy
Every night Slimey Sam's like this dream of their very own cuck shed.
With a donation of just £4 a month you can help buy a Slimey Sam a cuck shed to call home.
Call 08001 SHO-DEE now to donate.
reckon this man's hairmet could protect the queen in a nuclear war desu
>>67652126
J O R D A N
O
R
D
A
N
>Characters are having sex under the covers.
>After it's over, the woman makes a point to cover her chest with the bed sheet.
>>67649673
>character gets out of bed
>"John is kill"
>'no'
>"Sam come meet my boyfriend, he's so dreamy~! I've never had such a masculine man in my life before. :3"
>see this face
>>67652176
U mirin m8?
>>67652126
Does he have a marmot on his head? Is that what's hot in the streets of Gloucestershire now?
>>67652284
reckon jordan shouts "CHANGING OF THE GUARD!" and then sho dee pops out the closet making chimp noises and fucks sam's sister
Sam here. Cheers for posting the least flattering pictures of me you could find.
FYI, it's just a few angry fedoras posting my sisters info for having the cheek to go out with a black man. Here's a normal pic of me.
SOMEBODY BETTER TELL ME WHAT SLIMY SAM IS REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>67652471
Why the fuck are they trying to force you as a meme you ugly motherfucker?
>>67652471
>This is a 10 in Britain
Let me fuck your sisters breh.
>>67652471
Why do you keep callin yourself Slimey?
>>67652471
Have you contacted the police about the theft of your chin?
>character earns a lot of money
>like a whole lot
>especially for his age
>character goes to take a shit
>character takes a shit
>character goes to wipe ass
>character wipes ass
>character flushes ass wipes down toilet instead of just throwing them in the trashcan.
Sho Dee here. Cheers for posting the most flattering pictures of me you could find.
FYI, it's just Slimey Sam posting my GF's info for having the cheek to go out with me just because my cock length exceeds 25cm. Here's a normal pic of me.
>>67652471
Ur boring me m8
This is by far the most cancerous thread I have ever been in.
>>67652645
>not the other 40 capeshit/star wars threads
Lmao what a c.uck.
WhatsApp raid in 5 minutes
Get ready lads
>>67652702
At least it's tv/film related instead of whatever this autistic shit is.
>>67652645
All these flavours and you choose to be slimey
>character wakes up
>hair is suddenly big enough to house several bull in laws
OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS SLIMY SAM! WHO IS THIS KEK!
Toasting in epic bread
>character wakes up
>doesn't immediately take 2 shots of whiskey
lel nice realism hollywood.
Please stand for the national song of Gloucestershire
And now: bulls on parade
>Can't Cuck the Guk
AYO HOL UP HOL UP
SO YOU BE SAYIN
U BE SAYIN
WE WUZ BULL IN LAWZ N SHIET?
>movie about armed conflict in southeast asia
>character starts playing CCR's It Ain't a Fortunate Sun
Where can i go for more Slimey Sam?
>>67653140
Quedgely
>black character fucks a blonde character
>the seedy little brother doesn't scurry off to chat to single mothers on plenty of fish
>>67652729
touché
Kek
>play it again, Sam. Play "As Blacks Lay My (sister)"
What's this new meme?
>>67649673
> no sand in his eyes
What are you a hermit crab?
>>67654911
Bongs are ugly cucks. News at eleven.
>>67653755
>Sho Dee
Kek
>>67654950
>you will never be this new ever again
>character gets out of bed
>black man is plowing his sister
>asks him how he feels watching it
>Fucked off desu
>>67650723
It's a British thing.
>tfw muhammed uses your bed to plow your wife
>how fucked off is Sho Dee gonna be when autists like me message him on FB
>>67651911
im british and have never met a black guy
>character brushes his teeth
>doesn't spit out tons of blood
>doesn't have toothpaste and saliva all over his face
>>67650010
Has anyone ever jolted upright from a nightmare? I've had dreams where I die but I just open my eyes fast; maybe stir a little bit, but never actually sat up.
>>67658415
Did once as a teen when I dreamed I was having surgery and the anaesthesiologist fucked up and I was rendered blind, deaf, dumb and paralysed and just thought I wanted to die but couldn't communicate it to my parents
>>67658415
i have done it once in my life. i remember falling and as soon as i hit the ground i jolted upright. i was happy at first realizing it was a dream. then i laughed when i noticed i did that thing from movies. then i went back to sleep
>>67658415
Yes, I once dreamed some jigaboo was filling my pure sister with BBC sperm.
I woke in a cold sweat screaming. It was a shodee experience
>black character wakes up
>gets told "there's no need for this" by a pasty chinless white boi
>impregnate his sister and nick his PlayStation
>character is an aspie
>isn't constantly making weird humming noises under his breath
>isn't constantly blowing his nose and making weird snorting noises
>doesn't rock back and forth uncontrollably
S L I M E Y
L
I
M
E
Y
>mfw my sister hands me chocolate nephews who spout "bopitty mup dup do didda muhfugen box mood" all day and will never ever shut up
>Mom is trying to get her kids attention.
>Kid is listening to music with headphones.
>"Son, take off your ear plugs!"
>girl has her first period at an inopportune time
>>67660095
>Sam is trying to get his sisters attention whilst she is taking Sho Dees cock
Her name is Alice btw
>>67651796
I have two of those and I'm a loser.
Really wish I had friends though.
