Which is better?
Who would win in a fight?
Are there other movies like these ones?
>>67128596
Crank 2 is better than both and is the best movie ever made
>>67128596
>Which is better?
Crank 2 > Shoot Em Up > Crank
>Who would win in a fight?
Smith
>>67128628
What?
Crank 3 when?
So what's a good premise for CRANK3D? What should Chev's gimmick be for round three? The first was adrenaline, the second was electricity. Pitch your driving force for the mayhem in a third Crank outing.
>>67128628
This is autism
>>67128937
I liked the anon's suggestion who said that he is powered by Crank 2 DVDs which he has to insert into a DVD players surgically implanted in his chest.
>>67128937
Anal sex
>>67128937
He will die if he can't maintain an erection.
>>67128991
Receiving or giving?
>>67128937
Dehydration. He has to drink one litre of water every minute. Every time he gets hit he vomits water everywhere, is always covered in sweat, has to stop mid-activity to keep drinking, etc.
>>67128937
Zombie epidemic
Chev discovers that he's immune due to being dead several times before
He can cure people from being zombies by fucking them
>>67128937
Reddit upvotes.
>>67128937
He must remain drunk
crank
There was a movie like this recently, it was called Deadpool
>>67129442
Fuck off
>>67129135
FUND IT
>>67128937
He has to get dubs or he dies
>>67129605
If you know how to time it on /n/ you should be fine.
>>67128937
One anon had a really great idea that he's been mentally conditioned to kill Eve and the only way to offset his homicidal urges is to take psychoactive drugs, continuing to fight triads/cartels all the while. The potential for weird shit like the Godzilla fight from Crank 2 could be increased ten fold as Chev descends into deeper hallucinogenic mania over the course of the film.
>>67128937
Can't be done. The writers already went balls out with C2 because they didn't really want to do a sequel and tried to tank it, but apparently nobody read the script before greenlighting it and here we are.
>>67128937
Publicity, he litterally must be on the news at all times or some dumb device turns off his heart, he would be like Donald Trump but on steroids, he would make crank great again.
>>67130003
wow seriously?
so crank 3D should be something absolutely ridiculous
like the "needs a constant erection" post.
or maybe he needs to constantly play videogames and they get nintendo to pay for the whole movie since he plays a NDS the whole time.
Or maybe he needs to bingewatch netflix, so he fights with only one hand as he waches stuff from his phone on the other
>>67130393
Or go completely the other way and do something Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy style. Slow and subtle with almost no action at all, where he has to keep his heart rate near resting and have minimal adrenaline in his system.
>>67128647
This is pretty accurate although I think shooter is the more fun movie upon rewatches
>>67128937
Reverse of the first. Can't let his heart rate get too fast or it will detonate a bomb in him
>taking downers
>ice cubes up anus
>hiding in freezers
>strip club scene where he puts a rubber band on his nuts and gouges his eyes out (carefully as to not get excited)
>>67128937
There was an entire thread about this, and it had some fucking gold, my favorites where
>Chev needs the dopamine specifically released when singing, so he needs to sing to live, it's an action musical
>It's a prequel about the early years in Chelios' life. His house gets invaded by robbers, Home Alone style, and he has to deal with them, violently. Kid Chev is played by Statham with a propeller cap and a big swirly rainbow lollipop. The twist is that Chev is playing the floor is lava.
On topic: Crank is the better franchise, and honestly all fighting is worthless because while Smith is literally the human manifestation of Bugs Bunny, Chev can't fucking die. So they'd just fight forever and bring the end of mankind.
>>67129829
That was me nigga!
Imagine what a Crank movie could do given an actual budget
>>67130003
After knowing there's a Ben-Hur remake I'm not counting anything out of the equation anymore
>>67132106
>After knowing there's a Ben-Hur remake
>>67128937
Blood Sugar. Chev has to deal with diabetes.
>>67130393
Let me put it this way: the whole subplot with that one nigga's head in a jar?
That was put in for the express purpose of seeing whether or not anyone was actually reading it. They were actually thinking "There's no way, if anyone actually reads this there's no way it could get approved."
It's the most beautiful fuck up in Hollywood history. They just went balls-out.
>>67132264
Icing on the cake here: it's literally just 300/Gladiator/Troy/Hercules all over again
https://youtu.be/gLJdzky63BA
>>67128596
Shot Em Up was straight fucking trash.
>>67132382
Nigga if you can't appreciate death by carrot or the warehouse traps scene you might be dead inside
>>67132500
Don't forget the plane scene made even better by saints row 3
>>67132692
Holy shit I didn't even realize that was supposed to be an homage until...FUCK how did I not see that?
>>67129453
He's not technically wrong
It's a tamer version, but Deadpool ended up being the Crank of capeshit like I'd hoped.
>>67132382
>no fun allowed
>>67129829
I could watch this as long as its as good as the previous two with the funny shit but doesn't devolve into reddit memery
>>67132692
Off-topic, but the plane scene was the only good thing about 3.
>>67134370
It was the worst in the series easily but had its moments like that and the zombie Island with mayor Burt effing Reynolds
Why haven't they made a pt2 yet
