>Luke, did I ever tell you I watched your mother die?
>Luke did i ever tell you that i saw your father go from a brat child to a cunt teenager, murder children, chock your pregnant mother, and gain the low ground
He was a good friend
>Luke, did I ever tell you Yoda has a thing for blond boys?
>beep boop beep luke did I ever tell you I knew yoda personally during the clone wars. In fact I once came to this very planet with him beep boop
>Luke, did I ever tell you why I let you grow to adulthood on a farm, and didn't train you as a Jedi from an early age while I was still in my prime, or hide you on Dagobah to train with Yoda? Because I can't bloody remember.
>You probably could've taken on Vader and the empire earlier, and saved a lot of time and lives in the process.
>tfw I did kind of a shit job with both my padawans
Yoda, do you remember when I could fly?
He got his memory wiped you fool
>Luke, know Chewbacca do you? Tell you we were allies on Kashyyk during the clone wars did he?
>a good friend he was
>>64189730
Only C3PO got his memory wiped. R2 knew everything all along (for example: Luke's dad) and didn't say a word because he's based as fuck.
>C-3po, did I ever tell you Darth Vader built you as a kid and that we watched him win a deadly podracing race as a 10 year old? You lived with his mother and new husband in this very house for 9 years before Luke's parents pretty much stole you from them and brought us to a planet where you got decapitated by a conveyor belt and turned into a droid soldier for a short while.
Luke, did I ever tell you about that time me, Yoda, Obi-wan and C-3po were all present at you and Leia's birth?
>>64189642
>yfw Obi-Wan is the reason behind literally everything going wrong in the SW universe
>>64191580
Now it's the new Ben responsible for all the problems in TFA. Everything rhymes.
>>64191580
Oh fuck
