>Will you have peace or war?
>I will have HWARGH!
what did he mean by this?
he wanted a whore
It's uncanny how much Thorin looks like my brother-in-law.
The Hobbit moves are good as long as you think of them as LOTR prequels and not an adaptation of a children's book.
>>63095712
They're really not good by any metric. One was tolerable. If two was worth watching, it was just to see Smaug looking impressive. Three was unsalvageable.
>>63095005
Anyone else think Richard Armitage looks JUST LIKE Bradley Cooper? I noticed this when I saw BotFA.
>>63095949
I'd have liked him more if he didn't growl half his lines.
>>63096062
>doesn't like the growling
>Go North, by which I mean West because there's fuck all North of here but more dragons and then more fuck all and then snow, find the Dunedain, who I know you're intimately familiar with because we both remember the entire history of mankind. There is a ranger among them, you should meet him, he's ten years old so he's still living in Rivendell. His father Arathorn was a big guy, for me, which you know already, his son may be a big guy, for you. He will be known in a little shitburg town you'll never visit as Strider, I'm not telling you his real name but it rhymes with Arathorn and he's the only ten year old human in Rivendell, probably. Legolas, your mother loved you, which of course you know because you spent thousands of years together and as we're empathic elves I don't think we're capable of not loving our children, but maybe in AD&D or Warhammer or something we'll look like assholes.
>>63095949
Much more handsome and less jewish
>>63096104
hilarious
Somehow the Orcs talking in Black Speech rather than those cheesy Cockney accents made the movies much stupider than it should have been.
>>63096269
it also contradicts tolkien. black speech was a pretty artificial literary idiom devised by sauron that never really caught on as a spoken vernacular. orcs spoke a whole bunch of languages and dialects and would actually often resort to common speech because they could not understand other orcs from different regions
>>63095897
The really fucked Peter Jackson over by forcing him to stretch it into three films.
Coupled by the fact that Tarantino had to quit, making Peter Jackson have to direct the films when he never really wanted to in the first place, and it's understandable that they ended up being pretty lackluster.
I would also blame it on the fact that the Hobbit is actually a pretty bad story, but that would be an unpopular opinion.
>>63096314
they usually just communicated with screams
>>63096445
and Im going to continue posting these translations
>>63096492
>>63096395
>Tarantino
... Did you mean del Toro, or is this an amazing story I've never heard?
>>63096574
nah i'm not gonna direct the hobbit
>>63095712
I was on the verge of making a breakdown of the parts of the films that failed as soon as I could get my hands on the special features.
However, Jackson explained it all better than I could have imagined in a few minutes. I thought that he had choked on the directing. But I think that could have been LoTR quality if he could have planned things for a year.
There is no excuse for writing and staging such a massive thing on the spot.
>>63096635
>Slow motion scene of Bard on his horse riding up to Erabor
>this music plays https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHZz8gIF_I4
>>63096574
The holy fuck I have no idea how autocorrect mixed that up.
>>63096269
also made the orcs a lot less memorable, the only one that I kinda liked was the one with the cornrows that gets interrogated by what's face eyebrow man.
>>63095005
>MAH BOI, THIS WAR IS WHAT ALL TRUE DIPLOMATS STRIVE FOR!
>instead of Thorin just becoming greedy and reclusive because he's obsessed with hoarding gold they make up some bullshit like "Dragon's sickness"
seriously what the fuck was wrong with these movies
>>63095712
The Hobbit movies are the cinematic equivalent of when they play music from The Dark Knight on episodes of The X Factor.
