How can you be funny without being offensive?
like jerry seinfeld or jim gaffigan
>>62793007
He's shit comedian though, literally. He was never funny.
just stop talking about niggers. that's 90%
;)
Have your puppets say all the racist stuff for you.
Jerry himself admits he does the same jokes he did 15 years ago.
>>62793007
Think about the keeds.
Be a fresh air of breath in between offensive comics, gets your show, get icon status and by that you're funny by default
Try this
What's the deal with bananas ?
You got apple juice, you get orange juice.
Why can't you have banana juice
![big_1522[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/VzF7BdZ.jpg "big_1522[1].jpg")
>>62793090
Jim Gaffigan is family friendly and pulls off grossout humor at the same time. A lot of his comedy plays off of the fact that he's a giant, pale babyman who is constantly thinking about food, and it works.
It's much easier to play on a more appealing end of the spectrum and be a reliable opening act than do something like Neil Hamburger or whatever the fuck you call heidecker's style of standup is, which are both confrontational and negative. Seinfeld is like a cleaner Bill Burr, and his gentler 'complaint comedy' was a lot more appealing than say Burr was back in the 90's
Also, luck
>>62793007
jerry's not funny
Bill Cosby was inoffensive. He still is. So many vitriolic women seeking to vilify him.
>>62793134
>>62793007
Friendly reminder that the funniest comedian on the planet is rated G
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_X0486ynLI
Become perfection
>>62793007
Bee Movie blatantly promoted totalitarianism and it has been said that it worked better as a training video for the Hitler Youth.
Jerry's not a particularly good example of a non-offensive comedian.
just got back from an open mic. wow alot of cuties do open mic comedy
>>62793090
You have banana juice, family. You just need a shitload of bananas to make it
Any ITT try their hand at stand-up? I've been doing it for about 6-7 months and feel like I have a solid 3 minutes. Anyone got any advice or stories?
>>62793210
i was at an open mic but i'm too afraid to go up
>>62793301
I was afraid but once you're up there it's not so bad. It's just the minute before, when they call your name and you're walking towards the stage, that's scary.
i went to open mic night one time. . it was basically reddit comments in standup form.
every single person was a fucking loser
hurrrr i got arrested for drinking and driving im such a fuck up!
i lost my job and got fat and OMG I SAW A SPIDER IN THE BATHROOM AND FREAKED OUT :OOO
the best (worst) was one guy was unironically wearing a mountain dew shirt and half way into his set infered he was a 35 year old virgin.
>>62793372
ya i had a bunch of stuff on the paris killing and the holocaust.
>>62793479
there's literally like 30 people over the course of the night at the one i go to sometimes.
some really cringeworthy people; some make it work for them and some dont. i'm surprised there's a few hotties too
>>62793173
I find it more impressive if they can be funny without being vulgar
>>62793007
just found out seinfeld is performing in my town later this week, but tickets are like 80-100 bucks. contemplating that or battlefront
>>62793529
>>62793479
>>62793210
Roommate's a comedian so all the open mics he takes me to are all pretty much established comedians just trying new shit out on each other then getting drunk and swapping funny stories
Helps that the city I live in isn't shit for comedy
>>62793695
i really just want to fuck one of hte open mic girls that i saw the other night
>>62793173
>Brian Regan is 58 years old
Where has time gone
>>62793677
>buying anything from EA
C'mon now, you know better than that.
>>62793887
do it
people get into comedy because they're messed up one way or another
comedian girls are broken as fuck
>>62793007
>How can you be funny without being offensive?
Mitch Hedberg
>>62793956
>tfw stagnant in life
>tfw I felt like I was 20 yesterday
>now 26
>seeing actors that were in their prime when I was a kid now haggard as fuck
It hurts.
>>62794030
me too
thats why i was thinking about comedy. you literally only have to be funny for like 5-10 mins
>>62794170
more difficult than you think
>>62793210
I have 5 min that I wrote over 2 years ago and haven't come up with anything new that's really solid since so I'm quite bored with it all... Fucking writers block man
>>62793677
Hannibal Buress has a good bit about overpriced comedy tickets
If you spend that money, throughout the whole show you'll just be like "oh he's funny, I dunno about '90 dollars' funny"
>without being offensive
just c.u.c.k. me up
>>62793054
>Jerry himself admits he does the same jokes he did 15 years ago.
bullshit.
He admits he still does observational material, but he's always working on new stuff, refining it, and eventually retiring it at the end of it's natural life.
>>62793173
>funniest comedian on the planet
He has one of the greatest specials of all time but he's not the funniest comedian. Have you seen him in interviews? He's not funny off the cuff at all.
Maybe it's because he's constantly being praised, but he's always going "aw shucks" and saying milquetoast almost funny shit outside his stand up. His comedy relies on silly voices and facial expressions which he's really good at, but it's almost a crutch.
There are people like Norm Macdonald and Dave Attell who are always funny on and off stage who shouldn't be overlooked.
>comedy
Plebs
anyone watch the comedian? good flick
>>62793007
jerry's face is offensive
>>62793199
I'll bite because I've never seen the movie, what on this earth rocking world are you talking about?
>>62793007
His smugness is way more offensive than any possible cussing. In fact, the only reason he doesn't use swearing in his act is because he thinks he's above it. Fuck him.
>>62793007
He's not even remotely funny, never was.
>>62795913
> bullshit.
another anon here. You actually have no idea what you are talking about.
Seinfeld has said in multiple interviews that his standup is a greatest hits preformance. He does an hour and a half in which about 15-20 minutes is new or semi new jokes. The rest is old material some of which goes back more than 20 years.
I know because i have actually watched the interviews and seen him live multiple times
>>62793134
rekt
I can relate to the girl who dumped Jerry in Seinfeld because she thought his stand-up was shit.
She says "I can't be with someone if I don't respect what they do."
And Jerry replies "YOU'RE A CASHIER!"
What a fucking twat. I want to bunch his smug face every time I see it.
>>62798216
daily reminder
>>62793173
I remember this guy. Good times.
>>62793161
Probably the best Dad comedian in the world. Shame about his reputation.
>>62793210
I did an off the cuff thing at an open mike night about how I like to pinch off my pee stream and play music when no one is looking and how, in my middle school, if they knew you were shitting and couldn't get up people would bang on the sides of the stall loadly and shout at you.
Literal toilet humor but it was my first ever time in front of an audience with my own material. It helped that it was the worst open mic night ever. I got some mild keks from most of the room.
>>62798127
He doesn't use it because 'the jokes weren't funny without the swearing' and that nagged at him.
>>62793173
literal GOAT
>>62798453
The actual quote was something closer to "swearing cheapens any joke", which is shit logic. Swearing doesn't automatically make things funnier, it's only funny if you're doing angry comedy, and it requires skill to pull off well. What he's doing is denigrating something that he's bad at.
by being clever
Emo Philips is a good example
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ab6LWXeNDA
>>62793173
"Serving size 2 cookies. Who eats 2 cookies? I eat fig newtons by the sheev!"
>>62793134
Actually technically that is a puree.
>>62798316
He's right though. 99% of the content on YouTube is shit.
>>62799149
So is 99% of showbiz.
>>62799149
So's 99% of his standup though so it comes off as more than a bit disingenuous
Jerry Seinfeld not offensive? He's racist as fuck
>>62794734
I was just thinking about that joke. Hannibal Burress is goat.
>>62793007
good delivery
>>62793210
2-3 minutes after 6 months! Just give up.
Fucking hell.
>>62793090
It's a hive about fascism
>>62793210
I really want to give it a try but would never want to pursue it professionally.
Couldn't imagine anything worse.
>>62798404
shame he literally cannot stop raping
>>62796055
He gives a pretty good interview with Marc Maron. Probably because comedian talking to comedian is always better than a non comedian
>>62793502
id say your on to a winner
>>62798183
>He does an hour and a half in which about 15-20 minutes is new or semi new jokes. The rest is old material some of which goes back more than 20 years.
We are both factually correct. I was responding to the implication that he doesn't do new material.
>>62799567
>Marc Maron
>>62793677
>supporting EA games
>>62793090
shit this made me chuckle...we're all fucked
>>62793007
>like jerry seinfeld
No Jerry sucks.
>Why are things the way they are!?
>Isn't it ridiculous?
>>62793007
You literally can't. Take Jerry Seinfeld for example...
>>62793210
Been doing it two years. Get out now.
>>62793372
You get over that after a while. The scary part is when you start having to adlib.
>>62794170
5-10 minutes if you just want to be an open mic loser/opener for real comics. If you can't do 45 minutes then you are not a comedian.
>>62794554
Just sit down and write and don't get self conscious about it. Keep writing for a good chunk of time.
>>62799364
2-3 minutes is better than whatever you got fucko.
>>62799560
>>62799560
>>62799560
This. Don't get into standup unless you love making people laugh more than you lo e money.
>>62793007
>without being offensive
>Seinfeld
>>62793210
>be funny
>be talkative
>be comfortable with crowds
That's it. A genuinely funny person can talk for hours about the most stupid shit, ad lib and still make it funny. Sounds like you fail one of the above 3.
>>62799708
It's not about money, its just the putting yourself out there that doesn't sit well with me. That takes a special kind of person.
I like writing comedy though.
>>62793161
>Bill Cosby was inoffensive
Woody Allen too.
All the "clean" comedians are scumbags.
I remember an interview or something with Seinfeld where he said "Sometimes people offer me a spot in line or something and I never refuse. What's the point of being rich and famous if you have to stand in the back of a line?"
I'll give him credit for that. Guy came from a middle class existence to one of the wealthiest entertainers in the world, take advantage of it. If he was some trust fund prick, he could go fuck himself, but something about being a (formerly) average Joe makes it worth it.
>>62799708
>2-3 minutes is better than whatever you got fucko.
No, no it isn't. But even I had never done stand up in my life, 2-3 mins after 6 months is insanely bad. I would honestly advise giving up or just knowing that this will always be a side hobby for you and treating it accordingly if that's all you got after 6 months.
>>62799825
>All the "clean" comedians are scumbags.
Didn't Patton Oswarld write something about how some clean comedian who used to give him and all his friends shit for relying on being offensive or shocking ended up being some cunt that went on a raping spree through collage campuses?
Don't mention sex, religion or politics.
>>62799909
Most comedians should avoid politics in my opinion. It changes too much, what's funny today is old news next year. In the off chance you get somewhere with comedy, you'll be a flash in the pan.
Jerry does have some darker material as well
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2gPJpzgPReE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-Ra81Aqxvc
>>62793173
he looks like a fat jim carrey
>>62793677
It is pricey but I saw him last summer and he was pretty funny. My parents got me tickets as a gift and I took my dad because I grew up watching Seinfeld with him.
When I'm home to visit we can turn on TBS and still watch it together and laugh even if we've seen the episode 20 times already, so to me it was worth it to see Jerry in person
>>62793007
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00dFzPbzOws
Tim Vine is my favorite, I like controversial comedians too, but this guy is a genius.
>>62799825
Makes sense if you think about it. They need something to throw people off the scent. Like how cool actors usually play villains, and the ones that want to project a certain image only play Mary Sues.
>>62793007
Seinfeld. Top Teir
>>62799952
>"pills dont work, try a rope"
wisdom
>>62793200
and you embarrassed yourself infront of all of them
>>62800063
I love Vine as well. He seems to really rub some people the wrong way though.
>>62799881
>has never done standup
>expert
Most people spend the first year or so just trying to grasp how to do standup. 2-3 good funny minutes in the first 6 months is not great but I have seen 3 or 4 year comics who couldn't make a room laugh.
>>62793677
>Spending $80 - $100 to listen to somebody on stage for a few hours make jokes that you could probably find on youtube the following day
I understand the atmosphere and experience behind going to concerts, but I will never understand how people can justify paying that much money just to see their favorite musician/comedian/etc. on stage. That's borderline obsession.
>>62794554
>writers block
lol, kill yourself.
>>62796055
Dave Attell sucks.
>>62800284
It's probably because it's intentionally silly, but even if at first someone thinks what is this shit? How can they not just give in and get what he's doing.
It's innocent family friendly the type of joke we all heard growing up type humour.
>>62800299
Most people go out with friends, go out to eat, go to the show, and then maybe go out afterwards. It's an event. Yeah you can watch it on YouTube, but that's not as memorable. You can dumb down anything like this so you never have to leave your house. It's about the experience, but I understand why you may think that's dumb.
>>62798685
I was talking about what he said in the movie where he, CK, officeman and talking zebra chatted about being standups for 45 minutes.
Pretty decent watch, but I don't know the quote you're referring to.
>>62799280
>racist
no he isn't, he is friends with Steve Harvey and other negros
>>62798216
Well that's part of the comedy. And more importantly he's right. You don't get to look down on a stand up comedian's job when you scan groceries for a living.
>>62799563
cosby is innocent you fucking faggot
>>62799563
I'm not saying he didn't do it, I'm just said his comedy is tainted by it.
>>62800343
Here is your reply.
>>62793047
That's fucking genious.
brb, learning how to be a ventriloquist
>>62800390
Yeah, I was talking about the same thing. He makes his thoughts clear by the end of that bit.
>>62800410
>being a paid clown
>not below any other hard-working job
>>62800385
This.
People laugh more in groups, people laugh more when drunk, people laugh more with friends.
Comedy clubs provide all three of these, YouTube doesn't.It's still worth watching stand up sets on YouTube though
Make fun of yourself and not others?
>>62798216
You are now aware that none of the characters in Seinfeld were supposed to be likeable and they are all intentionally written to be petty, shitty people.
>>62800291
>even if I had never done stand up = has never done stand up
alright man
>>62801251
most sitcoms are based on shitty people
>>62801251
>i-it's just a character
it's like you know nothing about the man. he's an unrepentant asshole and makes no bones about it
>>62800104
Goody two shoes always have some sort of skeletons in their closets.
>>62794100
hes ok, not that funny really though
>>62793007
you just have to find something that everyone can laugh at without feeling guilty I guess
victimless humour
>>62793007
It's literally impossible to BE offensive. Offense is a purely passive action. One can TAKE offense, but one cannot GIVE offense.
A tree falling in a forest will make a sound regardless of an audience. Telling a joke about Catholics in a forest will only cause offense if someone is around to take offense to it.
Similarly, being funny is entirely subjective to the perception of an individual. Ergo, it is possible to be funny and inoffensive depending on your audience, but impossible to guarantee that offense will not be taken, and/or that a joke will be considered funny by any particular audience.
tl;dr: don't even worry about it.
>>62793007
Jerry is problematic as fuck OP
>>62800343
Here's another reply.
>>62803906
#realtalk
>>62793007
>How can you be funny without being offensive?
Simple, just keep up your absurd statements Jerry Seinfeld being humorous.
>>62803906
It is entirely possible to predict if a bit will cause general audiences butthurt, unless you're autistic and don't know which topics/opinions are off limits. Louis CK made a living walking that fine line of controversy. As for funny, I couldn't tell you. Plebs seem to laugh at the dumbest shit.
>>62793007
listen to brian regan. and stop being so edgy. there is plenty of silly and hilarious observational comedy out there that people avoid thinking they're too 'cool' for it
>>62793173
this. Regan is a fucking pro, and i have to much more respect for him for not being edgy.
>>62794100
Mitch Hedberg cussed and talked about drugs
>>62800299
considering how many hours ive wasted watching seinfeld i think i may have an obsession lol
>>62793007
What's that one guy's name from Full House that does clean comedy
He fucked alanis morisette
>>62793134
oh, the internet...
>>62793007
If you think comedy has to be offensive to be good you're literally 15 years old or a fucking retard.
>>62793134
This is puree. so sorry
>>62793007
>How can you be funny without being offensive?
By having a brain.
>>62793150
The thing is that Seinfeld is always entertaining to listen to, regardless of whether his bit is funny or not, it usually is clever enough to be entertaining.
My favorite bit of his is bit about how grown ups always use the word "down" while little kids always use the word "up". It's not funny at all but it's very clever and sentimental.
>>62796055
Dave Attell is shit off stage though
>>62793007
>>62793007
Learn from the best. Brian Regan. Go watch his special I Walked on The Moon
