i just want a fucking old billy dee back.

>>64410607

DAILY REMINDER THAT IF LUKE WAS LIKE REY

*Luke is an expert survivalist living on his own in Tatooine. He isn't subservient to Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. He loyally waits for a lost companion to return.

*Luke steals R2-D2 from a Tusken Raider on a Bantha who has captured R2-D2. The Tusken just watches and rides away.

*Luke can understand everything R2-D2 says. C-3PO is written out since he's not needed to translate.

*R2-D2 follows Luke around obediently instead of running away and generally just thinks Luke's awesome.

*Luke meets Obi-Wan and tells him he's just a nobody and didn't even know the Force was real. Obi-Wan hands Luke his father's saber and then disappears from the movie. No training required.

*Luke experiences a "vision" upon touching the saber for unexplained reasons. Magic lightsaber?

*Luke enters the Cantina and knocks down Ponda Baba and Dr. Evazan with a stick when they threaten him.

*Luke finds the Falcon with only Chewie inside as TIE Fighters start bombing the area. He jumps in and flies it with some wild maneuvers through Beggar's Canyon while Chewie works the gun port. They destroy the TIEs and return to get Han.

>>64410643

*Chewie is injured while running from Stormtroopers to get to the Falcon and Luke takes over as co-pilot.

*Luke fixes the Falcon's malfunctions by himself before Han can figure out what to do.

*Han is so impressed with Luke that by the time they get to the remains of Alderaan, he offers Luke a permanent job.

*They sneak into the back door of the Death Star unnoticed and somehow instantly find Leia's cell.

*Luke uses the Jedi Mind Trick on the guards at Leia's cell to get inside. (First time the Jedi Mind Trick appears in the movie.)

*Leia says Luke is amazing, thanks him and won't stop talking about wanting to run away with him and devote herself to helping him. Luke is not interested and says he just wants to be friends.

*Han somehow instantly finds the head Stormtrooper Commander and says he'll kill him if he doesn't shut down the tractor beam. The Stormtrooper Commander complies and they throw him in the trash compactor.

*Darth Vader finds the heroes. Luke watches as Han Solo confronts Darth Vader and is killed.

*Luke attacks Darth Vader and holds his own. He drops his saber but he is able to Force grab it before Vader can. (First time Force grab is seen in the movie.) Vader offers to train Luke. Luke lands several blows on Vader and cuts off his hand while remaining unscathed and Vader collapses in a heap. But there is an explosion that ruptures the platform between them and Luke must join Leia, Chewie and R2 back on the Falcon.

*Meanwhile, Wedge leads a small squad to do a bombing run on the Death Star. He easily hits the target without facing much resistance or even thinking about it much and the Death Star blows up.

*Luke officially joins the Rebellion at the end of the movie and is instantly selected to pilot a ship on a vital mission they've been waiting years to do. Their best pilot who just blew up the Death Star, Wedge, is passed over.

>>64410607
>implying we won't get to see a broken Rey at the beginning of 9
>implying we won't see her having tapped into the force, being stronger than ever, but having become a bitter jaded asshole in the process

>>64410607
There's nothing to say she couldn't become even stronger.

You may think she's ridiculous now but she's nothing compared to all those anime superheroes kids are used to these days.

take your misogyny back to reddit >_<

>>64410703
yeah she probably will but it will mean nothing to anyone with any taste

>>64410607
That scene was silly shit. I was hoping I remembered it wrong from my childhood, but it's even worse than I remember. Did anyone actually ever think that was good?

>>64410607
One of the top complaints is that she mirrors Luke too much and your complaint is that she differs in some way? Pick a lane senpai

>>64410643
>>64410674
Imagine being this mad and this autistic over a flick.

>>64410607
Luke was clearly a big guy. Getting caught was part of his plan, and the next step was crashing Jabba's sailbarge with NO SURVIVORS.

---

I never bought his explanation to Han "you had to be got out first". If the intention was to go murderhobo all along (since bullying a Hutt to submit is a stillborn idea), wouldn't it have been much easier to simply stabbity stab enough of Jabba's thugs while they slept in drunken stupour, especially since infiltrating the palace guards seems to be easy enough with nobody even suspecting Lando's real identity?