HG Thread - Jew-Free Edition
>>2017067
The Ride continues.
The air condifitoning is about to malfunction.
>>2017080
You mean the yawn? N-Now why would I want to do something like that under request? It seems rather suspicious!
Daily reminder that the Dangan circlejerk will save this community.
>>2017077
Warning: Air conditioning capacity at 10%. Reaching critical levels.
>>2016997
>She shakes her head.
Negative.
>>2017000
>>2017041
I am Ruri Ninjabayashi, an android created by the Mahogasawa Foundation.
>>2017004
Affirmative. Googling 'nearest pizza place from your current location'...
>
>>2017023
Data not found. Playing recording...
>An audio file plays. It is a man's voice.
'-only one of it's kind.'
>>2017024
Affirmative.
Last History Reset: One Month ago
>>2017029
Affirmative.
>She sticks her fist out.
>>2017034
CPU; noun; the abbreviation for central processing unit. Sometimes referred to simply as the central processor, but more commonly called processor, the CPU is the brains of the computer where most calculations take place.
>>2017092
Information noted; stored.
>An audio file plays. It is your voice.
'Mononobe no Futo.'
Salutations.
>>2017008 (Julian)
I...suppose so. Another individual from here has offered to teach me some...songs.
>>2017034 (Chen)
...Should you desire. I shall not bear any complaints.
>>2017036 (Kino)
I have no desire to harm any beings whatsoever.
>>2017092
Move on to the next job... or keep working for her until she doesn't want my services.
>>2017114
Thank you. Please continue your current programm of exemplary service.
>>2017117
Good to know. I might not need to stay here after all.
>>2017118
And when none other would desire such work from thineself?
>>2017034 (Chen)
Hmpf, mayhaps one of us might well surpass that shrine maiden, hm?
>>2017036 (Kino)
Almost entirely by the youkai whom I had mentioned.
>>2017114
>She recoils, eyes widening
Egads!
>>2017113
>Angrily channels feng shui
>>2017114
Well, you must have a battery, tell me where is it so I can remove it.
>>2017113
Warning: Air conditioning capacity at 9.9%
>>2017108
what was that about the yawn
>>2017114
Who?
>>2017113
>SCREAMING
>>2017113
this is too spoopy for pep
>>2017108
Oooh, you don't trust your right hand rabbit? I'm hurt...
>>2017109
the general pointed out they're all wearing future foundation pins and ultra despair bracelets
>>2017146
>>2017140
>A strong heat wave strikes back
>several pillars of flame erupt nearby the cart.
>>2017066
Don't know. Have you tried to email the producers?
>>2017069
Central-Processing-Unit
>>2017073
>NSA don't mind me
Why did you have to say that.
>>2017076
The cornucopia should have crates with ammunition, if not wait to see if you can get some from a sponsor.
>>2017114
You could just ASK to use my stuff.
>>2017092
>>2017140
I'm surprised she isn't here, nya.
Maybe SHE'S the real hermit after all.
Nyahahah~
>>2016901
Hmmmn....
That's a really good idea! I can even show Yukari and Ran-sama that I'm learning while I'm here too!
Good idea, Aigis-chan. You're a real help, nya!
>>2017117
This is gonna be tough, nyaaau..
I'll keep thinking!
>>2017114
...Uhhh.... So it's your brain? That big thing?
...Um, anyways, I'm chen, nya! Nice to meet you, Ninjanyayanya....Um... Ruri-chan!
>>2017113
Nyaaaa!!!! Too hot, it's too hot, nya!!!!
>>2017140
That's impossible, someone also wants something done. I won't be out of the job until I retire.
>>2017169
How to stop NSA from watching your google results?
>>2016978
I don't recall, maybe in another world we have.
Perhaps on another timeline we met, and what you're feeling now is deja vu.
>>2016988
I see...
>she's writing down on a clipboard.
>>2016989
Hah, tell me something I don't know.
He's like a child in a man's body, really is nothing but trouble.
Hence why I'm here, after all.
I met someone who knows him quite well, but he didn't help me in the slightest.
>>2017000
>sigh
You know of him too..?
Please, tell me everything you know.
And don't waste my time.
>>2017023
Dark Lady? Undead Knight?
Are you sure these aren't nothing more than your delusions?
>>2017041
Hmm.
>takes paper
...
What!?
>
>>2017114
Okay now at the same time, we're gonna bump fist, ready?
>he readies his fist bump
>>2017168
WHY IS THERE FIRE EVERYWHERE!?
>>2017147
...Talking food? You seem to be past your expiration date.
>>2017162
To be truthful, you are more of my left hand rabbit.
>>2017133
Oh, you...plan to depart again?
>>2017173
...Very well.
>>2017181
>She tilts her head slightly, observing you
>>2017181
Say sorry to Zlatan first then Zlatan will talk.
>>2017181
Huh... wait a minute, different timeline? Another world? What are you talking about Makise?
>>2017168
>he runs out of space to carve the days on his skateboard
>>2017168
>the heat wave has damaged the systems
Warning: System failure imminent.
>>2017175
>Why are you asking? Got something to hide.
See what you've done?
>>2017181
>smirk
I got you what you wanted, no?
>>2017114
Strange. Why wouldn't people use this internet thing more? It seems so useful.
>>2017199
bitch i'm as fresh as it gets
>>2017200
Do you not want me to leave?
>>2017109
Can I habe?
>>2017215
Ticket to South America
>>2017122
>She bows.
Affirmative.
>>2017140
>Her eyes light up.
Computing...
Egad; expressing surprise, anger, or affirmation.
>>2017141
Negative. Information classified.
>>2017151
Information classified.
>>2017169
Does not compute.
>>2017173
Information noted; stored.
>She plays an audio file. It is your own voice.
'Chen.'
Salutations.
>>2017183
>Her nose lights up red.
Affirmative.
>She doesn't move her fist.
>>2017217
Data not found.
Awaiting further input.
>>2017168
>>2017214
Hahaha! Mokou, aid me, we canst derail this wretched contraption!
>>2017173
>She laughs quietly, covering her mouth with a sleeve
Mayhaps it's too hectic even for her.
>>2017188
Hahaha!
>>2017199
That doesn't sound as good. Which hand do you use to write?
>>2017057
I don't need a new brain, I just need help with my coordination when backing up!
>>2017114
Awwwwwwwwwww, I want one... maybe I could find that man on the recording and ask really nicely... Ruri, TAKE ME TO YOUR CREATOR!
>>2017169
Cowinsidence
>>2017181
>Sighs
>Takes out Humanity
See this? This is Humanity, this allows Undead like me to not go hollow, or what you might understand as a traditional "Undead", so it allows me to stay sane, and I had a big quest to go on, long story, don't wanna get into it......
And you're not going to question my sudden change in gender... so I guess that's normal where you come from?
>>2017219
>picks you up
>places you in the trash receptacle
>>2017238
My right hand, as expected. Why do you ask?
>>2017234
Search "how many people use the internet".
>>2017234
Okay, go!
>he sends out his fist bump
>>2017214
W͍̠̦͎̹ͮ̐̋̏͐͑ͬ́a̧̔ͤ͏̺̺͓̣͎͇̮͖͘r̠̦̥̰̲͕͖͋̒ͨͦ̑ͪͨͩ͜ͅN̴̻̺͉͍̖͓͚̦̜ͨ͗̎̂į̸̘͚̟̻̲̣͈ͤ̄̈ͧ̋n̷͖͎̗͎͔̻ͯ́͞ͅgͣ̎̀̂́͂̈́ͪ҉҉͙̜͓̳G̶͇̹͙ͦ͊͋ͧ̑̈́͐͟g̸̯͛͌ͮ̿:̸̙͉̖͍̤̼́̓͋͛̃ͧ̚͟͞ ̸͔̗̩͖͙̝̍̒̾͒̍͠͝S̓̍ͤ͏̡̣̮͔̩y̛̗͕̬̖ͩ̚͜͡s̰̺̤̜̪̱̽͛͒̉t̨̤̣̹̘ͫ͗͝ȩ̷̩̇ͮͧ́ė̶͇̹͇͉͈̯͌e̠̣͍̹̅͌͛̊̾͆ͧe̴ͫ̃̃̿ͨ̓͏̰̫͎̠̝̻͕͙e̖̍ͅ ̛̰ͦͨ̃ͧͯ͗̐ͅs̶͓̹̝͒ͮ̀ͤ̔̓̚͘ê̱̠̻͍̼̦̥̈́̂̾̏̍ͥ̒͠͝v̱̖͒̅̂ͭͯ̎͘s͇̩̯̭͎̖̣̑̅ͬ̓͆͂̀͛͝ͅe̼̟͇̊̑́̌̀͢v͖̳͙͈͖̞͉̘͚̿̎ͨ̂͢͜e̠̠̜̬̯̘̝͗ͬ̈́̏ͅ ̵͕͕̘͙̱̺̥͑ͧͨd̬̩ͭ̿͑́́o̵͖̬̭̭̣̦̦̞͌͛ͯͮ̋͛̚t̢̺̪̪̫ͫͦ̒̅ͮͭ̒ͭ ̸̨̞͚̬͈̹̞̀ͦͧ̐͛̆̈ͬf͛̃͂̿̍̈́ͥͣͥ͏̢͍̮̝̮i̶̠͗͊ͬ͟͞ȉ̬̪̦̹̱̈̏ͬ͗͒̐̑͘͢i̸̡̫̫̮̦̗ͨ̐̓́̓ȉ͉͓̰̺́̉i̡̯̰͔̺̳̠̊̇ͨͬ̀̔̍̕î̵̯̖̥̖̗̰̳̼̓í̢̧̳̖͍̳̤͚̩̩͋͆͑̋̑̈́̐ī̶̪̱̺͈̟̘̅͐̾̌̄v͇̠͌̐ͭͣ͝e̴̠̲̺̹̺̦̭̭̯ͣͮ̐ͬ̎̓̍̚ ͍̫͈̟̖͑͐P̴̧̧͙̱͙͈͖̳͉̘̔͊̊̎̋ͤ̉̚Ẹ̸̡̋̿ͮͯ̽R̶̶̹̍̈ͫ̏̈́c̆̌̌̄̋̋͟҉̞̝̦̠̙͇̦̟Ê̶̠̱͍̙ͫ͌͟ň͇͍̼͍̙̈́͂ͩ́-̧͎̼̱͎̱̂ͥ̎ͧ̇ͪ͠ ͙̔̊̉̾̿̇͘͠z̶̛̫̝̍͗̈́ͣ̌̎ͅz̵͇̰̻̬̹̮̙̮͛̎ͭ́z͓͔̰̱͚̬͚̰͙̒̈́̔̇̐̐̃̚͝ẕ͕͍͙̝̳̽ͧ͛̀̀z̤̙ͩͯ̃͗̿͟ž̦̦͌͢z̥͙̹̬̦̦̱̯͉̋͒̈́̓͆̑́͘͘z̮̩ͬ̆̓͑́ͧ̅ͦͧ̕z̿̏ͤ̈́͐̅̅͑͡҉͈
>>2017234
You don't have a battery? Or do you and is the location classified?
>>2017251
Then I should be the right hand! There must be some mistake? D-Do I need to put Udonge back in the dungeon?
>>2017237
Are you the cause of all this!? Why are you doing this!
>>2017234
What is it with you and classified shit!
W͍̠̦͎̹ͮ̐̋̏͐͑ͬ́a̧̔ͤ͏̺̺͓̣͎͇̮͖͘r̠̦̥̰̲͕͖͋̒ͨͦ̑ͪͨͩ͜ͅN̴̻̺͉͍̖͓͚̦̜ͨ͗̎̂į̸̘͚̟̻̲̣͈ͤ̄̈ͧ̋n̷͖͎̗͎͔̻ͯ́͞ͅgͣ̎̀̂́͂̈́ͪ҉҉͙̜͓̳G̶͇̹͙ͦ͊͋ͧ̑̈́͐͟g̸̯͛͌ͮ̿:̸̙͉̖͍̤̼́̓͋͛̃ͧ̚͟͞ ̸͔̗̩͖͙̝̍̒̾͒̍͠͝S̓̍ͤ͏̡̣̮͔̩y̛̗͕̬̖ͩ̚͜͡s̰̺̤̜̪̱̽͛͒̉t̨̤̣̹̘ͫ͗͝ȩ̷̩̇ͮͧ́ė̶͇̹͇͉͈̯͌e̠̣͍̹̅͌͛̊̾͆ͧe̴ͫ̃̃̿ͨ̓͏̰̫͎̠̝̻͕͙
>>2017251
rude
>>2017221
I would...rather you not, but...it is your own decision.
>>2017200
Hmm? Oh, sorry.
I'm just writing this for future reference.
I've taken it to myself to conduct research of this place, including the people.
But I believe I already told you that.
>>2017205
>She lets out a frustrated sigh.
...Sorry to Zlatan.
Now can you please tell me what I want to know?
>>2017208
It's a complicated topic that I'd rather not talk about.
You can read any of my articles online, or attend one of my conferences.
>>2017215
Okay search "okabe rintaro".
And now search where to buy rope, heavy tape, and a bucket.
>>2017248
Hmm? Oh, I didn't even notice.
I know a boy who looks very much like a woman.
So in all honesty, it really wouldn't surprise me.
Is this claimed?
>>2017265
>picks you up by the collar with her right hand
There. Now you are in my right hand. There is no need to bully my pet more than is necessary.
>>2017271
>closes lid
>>2017281
I believe he's the only one not claimed.
>>2017085
>piss
One job civillian
So, when did JC come back?
>>2017233
Forwarding you to "Cheap flights to Chile"
>>2017234
I am Google, and you were using my stuff to do MY job.
>>2017248
Did you mean "coincidence"?
>>2017276
Uh, would you like pictures of him? And I'll forward you to Amazon.
>>2017261
>>2017270
Hahaha, fanneth the flames higher! HIGHER! AHAHAHAHAH!
>>2017267
Dost thou want off this infernal contraption!? It must BURN! It must ALL BURN!
>>2017215
Do all androids have a...Central...Pro... Processing Unit then, nya?
Do you have a Central Processing Unit!?
>>2017234
Whoa!
How'd you do that!?
...Um, okay...! That's fascinating too!
>>2017237
It's not a threat to Gensokyo either... I doubt it bothers her at all, nya.
>>2017274
Um...What was the name of your unit again, nya? Not Lambda, the other thing...
>>2017281
By me but I also claimed another one so go ahead. I don't wanna be a greedy fuck.
>>2017274
Alright, what's bugging you? Something is wrong with you here, I need to know what's up.
>>2017261
Four point two percent.
Please replace Mr Bones's special one-of-a kind generator.
>>2017276
Well he is a tall guy, Talked to Zlatan don't know ago. He likes shitty pepper, he some what likes you. And oh he time travels.
>>2017286
>She tugs on her collar to give her neck some room
This is a bit... literal!
>>2017296
Relief from sudden, unexplained blackouts.
>>2017281
Iyouta Mitarai in case you're wondering what his name is.
>>2017276
I think it's safe to say I would visit one of your conferences.
>>2017300
YOU CRAZY BITCH!! YOU'll GET US ALL KILLED!!
>>2017296
Uh, no.
I would like his location.
Here, in the arena, I mean.
>>2017308
Huh, thank you so much for this useful information.
If you don't mind, I'll be leaving now.
>>2017181
Who might that be? It's hard to ignore someone like Okabe when he goes crazy. Unless you just leave the area or you kick him out by force.
>>2017248
And that can also be fixed if we mess with your brain but neuroscience isn't my area, that's Matsuda's grounds.
>>2017307
One-of-a-kind you say?
>>2017276
Except I can actually change my gender, and not just be a guy with a dress... you can check if you really want, since it would be in the name of... SCIENCE!
>>2017296
Thanks!
>>2017248
Negative.
>>2017254
Affirmative. Searching...
'More than 3 billion people are now using the Internet, according to the United Nations agency that oversees international communications.'
>>2017259
>She mimics your action, bumping her fist against yours. Her nose stops glowing red.
Recording saved.
Information noted; stored.
>>2017262
Playing recording...
>An audio file plays. It is your voice.
'Or do you and is the location classified?'
>>2017269
Security measures.
>>2017296
Information noted; stored.
>>2017302
I am programmed with sound recording and playback capabilities.
Playing recording...
'NYEH HEH HEH!'
>>2017307
Buuurn, buuuuurn, BUUUURN!
>>2017302
All the better for us, aye?
>>2017320
HA! I art immortal! Regardless, this place doth revive you, regardless!
>>2017234
...Aye, aye it is.
>>2017302
My servers do, I don't. I'm all flesh and blood.
>>2017314
Have you considered seeing a doctor?
>>2017321
I don't track people... mostly.
>>2017327
I hope it is.
>>2017276
Ah, my apologies for...intruding.
>>2017302
...Murakumo?
>>2017306
Your...flightiness, I...suppose one could say.
>>2017321
Zlatan will see you soon then. Sweet bitter red thing.
>>2017327
Well that sucks.
>>2017327
Dammit, where can I find the guy who built you?
>>2017320
Then I hope you enjoy it.
Usually I would've done a conference on the concept of time travel not existing.
But now, it's the complete opposite.
>>2017322
Hmm, I believe his name was Souda.
I met him when he didn't "exist"
But once we made him exist again, he didn't help me at all!
He's just as annoying as Okabe.
>>2017325
I'd really rather not, but thank you for the offer.
>>2017339
Is there a map of this place?
I'd like to find that.
>>2017300
>suddenly the flames are extinguished around the carts for a moment, before re-erupting with twice as much power.
>it's like the fire is being controlled...
>>2017333
I don't want to go though the pain of dying thank you very much!!
>>2017327
Nice, I really feel like I did something today.
Also, just checking, ya know how to high five?
>>2017327
That's unbelievable...uh, log off for now.
>>2017339
Ah, much better idea.
"Doctor Faust address."
>>2017327
EXCUUUUSE YOU, METALLIC HUMAN! YOU CAN'T JUST STEAL MY SIGNATURE CACKLE! I HAVE IT TRADEMARKED, NYEH HEH HEH, CONSIDER A SAFE ALTERNATIVE SUCH AS, BUT NOT LIMITED TO; NYOH HO HO, OR, NYAH HAH HAH.
>>2017340
That's all? Look, I know I can be... rather unpredictable, but that's just who I am as a person. It's also to keep my enemies on my toes.
>>2017310
>places you back down
Well, you did ask for it~.
>>2017348
Fire is the great purifier!
>>2017347
>In a fire-fuelled craze, she wildly adds her own magic to it
>>2017319
Thanks
>>2017333
>She tilts her head.
Does not compute.
>>2017339
Affirmative.
>She plays an audio file. It is your voice.
'I am Google.'
>>2017343
Information noted; stored.
>>2017344
Information classified.
>>2017353
Searching database for 'high five'...
>her eyes flicker all sorts of colours.
Data not found.
>>2017359
Playing recording...
'THE GREAT PAPYRUS!'
Salutations.
>She bows.
>>2017345
Kazuichi? Out of all the people here you talked to one of the most useless. Aside of his skills as a mechanic he's not the person you'd want to ask for information.
>>2017345
Someone changed your mind on the matter? If so, who did that?
>>2017374
Fire is fucking deadly!
>>2017322
I dunno, brain picking seems risky, what if he messes something up, or changes the smallest thing and causes my brain to... well shut down...
>>2017327
Awww, c'mon, what if I say please?
>>2017345
Hey look I'm not into the whole "Random people touching my private areas" but if it's in the name of science, I'd let someone do it...
>>2017359
Be quiet you BONEhead...
>>2017347
Yeah, I wonder who could be up to that?
>>2017377
Is there anything about you that isn't classified?
>>2017359
Is this another Papyrus?
>>2017319
What's this bad motherfuckers name?
>>2017333
>I gotta meet some folks for dinner.
>Stay beautiful, peeps. ;v
>>2017339
So it's a "computer"s brain, nya! Chen gets it now!
>>2017340
Mm-hmm!
...Oh, I've got it! For now I'll call you Ramu!
I'm glad I could come up with that, nya!
I just remembered, I need to make dinner for tonight.
Hope that nickname works! I'll see you later, Ramu-san!
>>2017327
Ohh... so you can remember sounds and play them back, nya.
I'd love to learn more, but I have to leave now!
>>2017333
For now, uh-huh!
>>2017369
Did Not! I was just trying to help you realize who your best bunny is!
>>2017390
Nah, I'm sure that kid knows what's he's doing. But then the Undead-chan we know and love might not be the same, right? So...Just be careful.
>>2017345
Well the arena changes depending on who's hosting, but I'll supply you with a couple up-to-date ones.
>>2017355
>Hand's address and directions.
I hope it gets resolved.
>>2017377
>facepalm
"Thank you" for the confirmation.
>>2017399
Essentially.
>>2017374
>the fire reaches out to you
You dare play with powers that are beyond you. If you do not cease this foolish mortal quest, then you'll die by the lord of Hell.
>>2017347
Warning: 24 nights remain.
>>2017398
tengan kazuo
>>2017407
Here ya go.
>>2017398
>>2017395
I just felt like doing that
>>2017281
>tfw you wanted to pick a new D3R dango but you already have one.
>>2017409
>>2017369
>
Is the game over?
>>2017377
Here, raise your hand above your head, like so.
>raises hand
>>2017422
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>2017386
Wouldst thou truly rather spend ETERNITY upon this damnable thing?
>>2017391
It matters not if the ride itself canst not end, when there are none left within to ride it!
>>2017417
Thou thinkest I mortal, demon? Thou knowest not what I am, then!
>>2017424
Okay... just checking.
>>2017390
Negative.
I am unable to return to the Mahogasawa Foundation,
>>2017392
Affirmative.
Information regarding my blueprints and the Mahogasawa Foundation are classified.
>>2017399
Information noted; stored.
Farewell.
>She bows.
>>2017416
Affirmative.
>She bows.
>>2017432
Affirmative.
>She copies your actions.
>>2017431
no, the spoops are still going
>>2017423
>new dangans
fuck sakes, the last thing this place needs is more cancer
>>2017399
...Understood, farewell, Chen.
>>2017367
...And your allies, likewise.
u guys suck
>>2017434
I rather jump off a cliff then go through this bullcrap!
>>2017433
Something wrong?
>>2017434
So be it.
By the powers of the Hell. I will eradicate you.
>Everyone dies ending avoided.
>>2017446
You're right, anon. We need more Strike Witches and Steven Universe.
>>2017427
I'm actually the queen of the 4 leaf chin! Give praise to me or I'll banner you!
>>2017453
N-no, i-it's nothing... h-hahahaha...
>>2017448
Hi there my young fellow. How are you doing? It appears to me that you are, in fact, kind of displeased with the current situaton. What is it, that makes your life hard currently? Is it maybe a cause of the recent roasting of your jeromes that suddenly happened? I really have to say that this roasting was, without any doubt, the strongest since the year 2000 hoax. Do you have an idea why this waddling of your walters was so powerful? No? Well well well... I can for sure tell you the truth about this important event. It was ME who tricked you into this displeasement. I can hear your brain trying to comprehend how this is even possible. But, and I'm sure about this, you cannot comprehend of what happened to you because it is too complex. Even Zeus and Thor were struggling finding the right way in this gigantic and evil maze of trickery. It took me 1000 years to fully write my plan down, and another 1000 to understand it. The complexity is higher than that of a 14-dimensional dodecahedron. It all starts out with the day of this legendary ruse. The day of rusement was carefully planned and calculated on this exact day. The day where an astronomical constellation appears, that will never occur again in the next 3 eons. A constellation that generates an antimatter black hole. This sort of black hole doesn't suck matter. Antimatter black holes suck the "Well being" out of everyone.
>>2017340
Hmm? No, don't worry, you weren't.
I was simply taking note of everything you've told me, it's very useful.
>>2017343
I-I'm not bitter.
I'm just frustrated with..people.
>>2017384
In my defense, I was informed he was the best person to speak to in that regard.
Or, misinformed, it seems.
>>2017386
His name was Okabe, but he likes to go by..
>sighs
Hououin Kyouma.
He's a scientist, much like myself.
We work together as lab members at the Future Gadget Lab.
>>2017390
Your tone is telling me it's not "for science".
I'm not touching you, either way.
>>2017416
Yes, that would be a great help.
Anything will work.
>>2017416
Thank you very much.
>He takes the directions and begins to walk away.
>He stops dead, and shrieks, dropping the directions.
>He then being contorting, only to crawl away bent over backwards.
>>2017463
please no, i'll take the dagans over the strike witches any day
I heard there was a bunch of faggy ass little fucking girls in this thread getting their sensitive little feelings hurt because of some shitposting, so I came here to hurt your bitch feelings even more by adding to the shitposting. Are you degenerate asshole lickers ready for the shit? It's fucking coming right now in the shape of my text smelling of pure shit. I'm going to make a new entry thread with a picture of some autistic child on my face, then I'm going to let it fill up with the 48 tributes, and then I'm going to delete the thread and create a new one. I will infinitely repeat the process until these fucking games are killed like the cancer they are, and I will fucking succeed in my plan. I will wipe the cancerous likes of Ryona, Fumi, Adachi, Littlefaggot, King Cuck, Hoshit, Faggot Russian, Foot Fetishist, Thanks for hosting Yuno, Fagbrose, and any other faggots that might think they're relevant off the face of this fucking board. You're all fucking shit and I will destroy you fucking wankers.
>>2017442
Well, that's useless, remove your own battery.
>>2017419
>>2017423
Thanks famzillas.
>>2017407
>Ringabel/Zacharie/Lala
>>2017415
And you'd miss me soooo much, I know, it'd be a whole different world without my wicked sense of humor...
But I didn't know you cared so much, Mistress Fumi~
>>2017442
Hmm, Why not- WAIT. I know the answer, Classified right?
>>2017447
Yes, even my allies.
>He looks at the sky
Damn... well, I gotta go... see ya.
>>2017467
>>2017448
But did you see someone feeling bad today? Yes, my little fellow I created a lens that focus the power of the antimatter black hole directly on you. It took 300 years to create this extremely complex lens and I had to combine the power of the gods of Olympus to create it. But not enough with the rusement. As I'm not some novice ruseman, I have planned even more trickery sprinkled with lies and intention logical fallacies and a good portion of something you dislike seeing in your surroundings. With my ruseman instincts I already knew you were typing your response to the displeasing content you just saw. At the exact moment of sending your response you have started up the machine of displeasure and "not well being". A machine that once started cannot be stopped. Not by anyone. Not even Cthulhu himself. While your comment was traveling through the cyberspace you started feeling bad. Something in your brain was screaming but you just didn't know why. It was destiny that you fall for my trickery. Wit this message you are currently reading I am telling you something you should have thought before you were sending your comment to me. I am, in fact, A MASTER RUSEMAN GRADE 3. I was part of the ancient circle of master rusemen. I can see on your face, that you already knew this. A ruse this fantastic and gigantic cannot be done by some low grade rusenoob. Yes you have been RUSEDI by me. There were only one RUSEDI known to mankind until now. Can you imagine of how hard it is o do? Only two RUSEDIS were executed in the past...3...billion...years! Now you finally know about this unbearable discomfort you started feeling right when you got my response. The response, this message, reveals of what has been done. You... yeah YOU.... have been rused. You are powerless, you want to scream but you can;t.
>>2017451
'Tis done!
>>2017458
>I almost feel bad being the only person to reply to the slides.
>>2017399
>Seeya, Chen
>>2017466
You know I might not go through depends on how I'm doing.
>>2017442
Alright now, we're gonna smack our hands together, ready?
23 nights left before the doomed ending.
>>2017448
>>2017467
>>2017484
You just sit there in a mix of rage and helplessness. You want to find this guy, this MASTER RUSEMAN GRADE 3, and you want to kill him. But at the exact moment of thinking, you also realize that you will never be able to even come near such a powerful ruseman such as myself. This ruse has set me into a position higher than Hades. You think now you might come over this rumbling of your jordans. You think you can bear it, but my devilish plan goes far deeper. Now after you've already been rused to infinity this letter discomforts you to a new level of discomfort. In the moment you are reading what I wrote you realize how hard you have been bamboozled. I will tell you my story now. I don't know where I'm from, but I know I was the first to exist in my kind. I was alone but soon a few people followed. We made a circle called MASTER RUSEMEN. Only real MASTER RUSERS were allowed to join this exquisite circle. We agreed that we will never decide who is the best MASTER RUSEMAN. But after some time I found a way to lead my fellow comrades into a tricky situation. I claimed that I'm the best MASTER RUSEMAN in the circle. It didn't take long till everyones jacobs' were rommled. After they found out what exquisite trickery was played on them, they agreed to give the one who caused this discomfort the title GOD OF RUSE. Now you realize what huge impact this ruse had. You never thought that you will be, in fact, rused from such a ruseful entity. Somehow you feel honored. Honored to get your gustavsons jingled by the master of all MASTER RUSEMEN. The rusement was too strong. Not even time itself could recover from the wounds this monumental trickery caused the Universe. I am, for my part, pretty proud of myself. Even I had my doubts if I could make a contrivance this huge and tricky. But I did it. I managed to create the most thoroughgoing RUSEDI.
>>2017469
Are all the people you talk to crazy and don't like you?
>>2017475
Negative.
Battery Levels: Charged
>>2017481
Does not compute.
>>2017490
>Her nose lights up red again.
Affirmative.
>>2017469
...Ah. Very well, then.
>>2017482
Oh...farewell, Julian.
>>2017469
>hands folder
Here are several arenas with a few notable features shown on each one.
Anything else I can do to help?
>>2017470
That's a new one. and mildly creepy.
>>2017448
>>2017467
>>2017484
>>2017494
You have been rused by me, the ONE AND ONLY! Even after 100 years you will still remember this day. The day of THE ruse. The day the GOD OF RUSE personally made a statement, to intentionally discomfort YOU. SONGS WILL BE WRITTEN ON THIS MASTERFUL RUSE. AND I HOLD NO REMORSE OR REGRET FOR I AM AND ALWAYS SHALL BE THE GOD OF RUSE.
>>2017469
You told me this before... except for the part about you working in a place called the Future Gadget Lab. That was new.
>>2017487
NOOO!!!!
>>2017491
THANK YOU!!
>>2017500
Drink a tall glass of water.
Warning. Self-destruct in 2 nights. Battery level critical.
>>2017487
>just drop it, let everyone die after 23 slides, and be glad it's over.
I understand now why nobody wants to host
>>2017506
Show me pictures of fat furries touching eachother with their assholes pushing their shits back and forth
>>2017500
It wasn't a question, it was an order.
>>2017500
Okay, go!
>his hand flies out
>>2017508
>>2017491
Damnation, if it isn't working!
>>2017377
...'Twas a statement of confirmation.
>>2017519
I will never get off this wild ride... it's impossible... why must this happen to me... why...
>>2017469
Very misinformed. If there's someone who knows that guy better than anyone in this place it's me. And maybe the gay crew he hangs out with.
>>2017481
...Yeah, you think that. It would be such a loss for everyone here. And don't call me mistress.
>Pats your helmet.
>>2017458
>>2017519
Everybody may as well quit, we all know who is going to win here.
>>2017519
it's happening
>>2017519
...What the Hell is this?
I'm so glad I wasn't here to enter..
>>2017536
7/10
>>2017519
>night998
>>2017541
May life be spared... from this hell.
>>2017510
Affirmative.
>She lifts her hand up to her mouth.
Error: Water not found.
>>2017522
Access denied.
>>2017525
>She copies your actions once more, successfully giving you a high-five.
Recording saved.
Information noted; stored.
>She plays an audio file.
'Thank you for the information.'
>>2017531
...Computing...
Warning. Damage critical. Integrity at 0.1%
>>2017458
Did I become a demon without realising it?
[ You became a final boss, Kino! ]
But Hermes, I never asked for this...
>>2017521
N-n-no... just. no. Go to Bing with that one instead...
>>2017558
take me to the deepweb
>>2017500
Hmm... Activate.... PETTING ROUTINES!
>>2017533
Oh I'm just teasing, and don't pet me... you wouldn't like me when I'm petted...
>>2017541
This would be, Mr. Bones Wild Ride, it never ends.
>>2017541
Spooky wild ride, welcome back to hell "dead one".
>>2017541
Damn the contraption, but I cannot stoke the flame to purge us to freedom!
>>2017551
>420x420
>>2017555
Ride is almost over... I can feel the end in sight. Thank you...
>>2017553
Aren't you supposed to follow every oder?
>>2017409
>sorry, had a phonecall
Reisen? Oh, right.
>pets your head
You can be best bunny if you like.
>>2017495
I-I'll have you know I'm very likeable.
And I don't talk crazy, you just don't understand.
>>2017503
So just, keep doing what you'd usually do and don't mind me.
>>2017506
>attaches the folder to her clipboard
Hmm, no, I think this will be enough.
I'll have to evaluate the information you've given me tonight.
Again, thank you for your help.
>>2017508
Uh, yeah.
I'm a Lab Member there.
Lab Member 004 to be more exact.
>>2017533
Hmm, well I haven't spoken with you before.
if you could please tell me anything you know of him, that would be a big help.
I really wouldn't be surprised if he's gone and gotten himself killed or something.
>yfw at night 1000, it is revealed the AC has somehow been fixed and we have to go through another thousand
>>2017580
...Very well, ma'am.
>>2017568
Affirmative.
Petting Systems: Online
>She sticks an arm straight out and begin patting her hand up and down in the air.
>>2017578
Negative.
Administrator password required.
>>2017566
>whispers
down the hall to the left. Keep it quiet.
>>2017580
Is it possible for me to become a Lab Member? Seems like fun to me.
>>2017583
>
>>2017555
I've never been happier about missing a game in my entire life.
Man, do I feel bad for you guys.
>>2017583
>>2017555
Shutting dow-------
>the ride erupts in flames, everyone dies
>Original plan:
>>Someone notices what the fug I wrote at n5
>>Summons satan
>>Kills
>>New adventure in the heart of the sim
>>Ends with BSOD
Kino as satan was bonus for forgetting him.
>Thanks for trying to be active Kano (if you're the same Mononobe No Futo, if not, thanks anyway)
The games die when I die......
>>2017552
It looks terrible..
I feel sorry for the people stuck in there..
>>2017568
N-Never!?
Then just what does that mean for the people stuck on it!?
>>2017569
Fumi, you too!? Stop calling me dead!
I don't understand.. I'm not gonna die! I'm not gonna let myself die, not like that!
>>2017570
I still can't understand what you're saying!
>>2017593
Who has that password?
>>2017553
Niiiicccceeee, I feel like a skateboarding guru right now.
Now i'm gonna teach you a variation of the fist bump called the fist bomb, it's like a fist bump but at the end, ya poof your fist like an explosion, ready?
>he readies the fist bomb
>>2017607
>Sobs softly
>>2017610
It never ends... it never ends.... help me.
>Looks at the wild ride as it bursts into flames.
And that's that.
>>2017610
Jungo saw you get...decapitated.
>>2017607
>>2017580
Understand what? Trying to chase a mad man to the brink to insanity? I see why you act like this. All the work you are trying to do is not working. You can't find him and you are deathly afraid of losing your own lover. Zlatan knows this too well.
>>2017616
Information classified.
>>2017617
Affirmative.
>She readies a fist-bump.
>>2017553
>Awkward staring
>>2017607
AHAHAHAHA!
>Sorry, I'm a new one.
>>2017620
Freedom in the flames!
>>2017610
Hahahaha, it succeeded!
>>2017579
>Please please, it doesn't matter
What does Reisen even do?! C-Come on!
>>2017607
NIGHT
FUCKING
1000
>>2017607
New futo is Aussa. Does not compare with based Kano.
>>2017633
Go!
>the fist bomb goes out
>>2017593
Activate petting sub-routine: Receive Pets.
>>2017607
Good thing I wore my Fire Stoneplate ring...
>>2017610
Well for everyone who can't live forever, they die eventually, then everyone who can't die, like me, we get stuck on the ride forever... and probably go insane...
>>2017597
Search Google x Bing slash fiction
>>2017633
... Do you have an anti-virus?
>>2017619
D-Don't just throw something like that on me! Help yourself! I don't know what to do!
>>2017622
Why's everyone here!? Is this just a big joke!?
It's not funny!
>>2017638
Calm down! You've got a crazy look in your eyes and you're freaking me out!
>>2017652
O-Oh.
That doesn't sound fun.. I, uh..
Sorry..?
>>2017651
have an image i found on 5x2-2chan
>say you have to leave for a bit
>end up having to leave for 4 hours
Well that was unexpected.
>>2017638
>Stares back.
Generating conversation topic...
>An audio file plays.
'How's the weather?'
>>2017651
>She fist bumps you. Upon impact her hand pops out and she plays a stock audio file on an explosion.
>>2017652
Affirmative.
>She pulls her hand back, and lowers her head.
>>2017659
Affirmative.
How to find a hiding Aussa:
Aussa always replies a few minutes after Sol says something no one cares about.
>>2017655
>>2017607
>night5
T-that isn't fair, I'm using Clover.
>>2017666
thats life for ya
>>2017610
Stop yelling would you? "You" died yesterday in front of everyone, of course these idiots would keep telling you that. But I don't care much to be honest, I mean...You came back soon after.
>>2017622
Wait, you were there?
>>2017580
I'm sure he's fine. Let's see...I dated him for about 8 months and learned everything there's to learn about him. Even his miraculous discoveringabout, you know, his time travel microwave.
>>2017568
What do I unluck if I keep petting you?
>>2017639
She is just less... erm, mischievous than yourself.
But I already said you could be best bunny if you liked so it does not matter, hm?
>>2017664
I'm sorry, I just wanted the whole thing to end... that's all.
>>2017666
>Such is life.
>>2017671
Good enough to save you from a super computer virus?
>>2017666
Games will probably still be running.
>>2017664
Jungo doesn't like those type of jokes...they're not funny.
>>2017679
Unfortunately...
>>2017672
Also replies to everything remotely inviting. Which isn't a bad thing since it's something more people should be doing and kudos to her for that but it would be nice if it wasn't EVERYTHING
>>2017591
>she looks over you, blushing in the process.
You said you were an...artificial human..correct?
>>2017598
Hmm, I wouldn't say it's impossible.
But to do so, you'd have to ask Okabe, since he's our...
>sigh
...leader.
>>2017631
I-I'll have you know he's not my "lover".
I'm simply his...assistant.
>>2017652
>>2017506
>Just in case.
>>2017679
Y-you..d-dated him?
>she looks distraught
....How long ago was this?
>>2017655
>hands box
Just take it and leave and keep it away from me forever
>>2017664
Oh don't worry, I always find out ways to get out of these situations... and you're taking finding out I'm Immortal well...
>>2017666
Well your back now, and that's what counts!~
>>2017671
>Pets with the gentle ferocity of a million suns
Best Robot...
>>2017679
I won't stop you... but it'll be super scary...
i want classy raven to rip my teeth out and fuck my bloody mouth
>>2017695
Affirmative.
Playing recording...
'doesn't sound very you know, friendly.'
>>2017704
Compliment noted; stored.
'Thank you'
>>2017683
But you're only saying it to make me feel better!
>>2017664
Oh!
>She clears hear throat loudly
Mine apologies, human, I at times grow...well, much alike that.
>>2017666
And to what doth thou mean, human?
>>2017671
...What?
>>2017662
>I'm not entirely certain if you mean that literally or in some kinda backhanded manner
>But thanks if it's the former, either way.
>>2017700
Zlatan knows you're lying. God knows who you love and that is shit taste soda guy who time travels
>>2017700
He's your leader... doesn't sound to hard. I think if I talked to him, he will understand.
I want to violently rape Muffet
>>2017665
>thanks
>>2017671
Damn, you're a fast learner aren't you? Nice touch at the end by the way.
Now that I've taught you the fist bomb, we're gonna take it up a notch and teach you skater dialect. Your first word is dude. Duuudddeee.
>>2017679
I won't believe you.
Seriously, I just won't.
It's not even close to my birthday and you're trying to pull one over on me, I get it.
Well, I'm not gonna fall for it!
>>2017694
>
Stop making me worry, you moron!
>>2017697
Then stop pulling those jokes! You and Fumi definitely teamed up and are trying to surprise me or something, s-so drop the act!
>>2017704
You're what?
>>2017700
>She nods once
Affirmative.
>>2017722
me too
>>2017714
>I do not understand the concept of death
>walks up to you
>shoots self in the head
>>2017714
I'm friendly, I'm asking for your own safety.
>>2017712
Anon, I think you should do the world a favor, and check yourself into a mental institution.
>>2017716
Huh? When did I say that? Do not be silly Tewi.
>>2017722
I don't.
>>2017730
>He starts rubbing his head
I'll try, but I won't make any promises.
>>2017744
i would but they're illegal where i am
>>2017739
...Scanning...
>>2017740
Error: 404 picture not found.
>>2017743
. . . Information noted; stored.
>>2017719
Well, quit it! It's weird and it's making me uncomfortable! Are you some kind of pyromaniac!?
>>2017748
Hmph. Yeah, it sure is fun playing with Airi's emotions.
Hurr durr. Jerk.
discuss
>>2017719
I meant that you are less cancerous than most of the civilians here, if I am allowed to use such words.
>>2017700
Did you even listen to me? I said 8 months. We broke up on december because he was tired I was the dominant one in our relationship. Feels good not having to deal with his sorry brain anymore.
>>2017704
...Fair warning. Do not pet the Undead-chan.
>>2017697
Oh boy, you sure you're alright? You're the one who's into the whole friendship bullshit more than us.
>>2017730
Why would I lie to you? I can just show you a recording, it's really no different from Nicaea if you think about it. But keep your empty head deaf to facts and reality if you want. Not my problem.
>>2017720
"Zlatan" knows nothing.
>>2017721
I will warn you now.
He is not the easiest person to talk to.
>>2017739
I...I would love to hear your reasoning as to why you thought that would work.
>>2017736
Who...designed you, exactly?
>>2017746
Tell me I'm the best, then! Better than Eirin even!
>>2017762
I'm not trying to play with your emotions here. It just sorta happens alright?
>>2017764
>Cirno
>A
Whatever you say, buddy.
Alright, I'm back.
If you people took a few hours to make an actual bounty board, that'd be fantastic.
I'll be over here if you want to make an offer.
>He leans against a wall.
>Soon he's snoring.
>>2017766
>Getting a little upset nobody pays attention to the extremely long meme game
Cmon
