![ref[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/S5zpwyP.jpg "ref[1].jpg")
/sp/ i am refereeing some soccer games tomorrow. what can i do to fuck it up. give me ideas
if anyone that isn't white falls over in the pen box they are diving, do not give a penalty, do give a yellow card to the diver
fouls can occur without the "victim" falling down.
if you only call the fouls in which the players fall down, they'll start to ALWAYS throw themselves onto the ground.
>>67401906
Call a benulty with nobody in the box
>Give random penalty to minimal contact in box
>Give yellow to all players protesting
>>67401918
Yeah do it, OP. Make the difference. This sport has penalized whites way too much.
>>67401906
Alright little shit.
First, identify their CF, then give him a yellow (if he isn't commiting a yellow worthy foul just wait until he is making physical contact with another player to take the ball)
Then, when he gets fouled inside the penalty area, you give him another yellow for diving (that way he can't appeal the red). After that grant penalty to the opposition (even if their players dive to get it) and deny penalty to the other team
However you must be careful, if it's too blatant you are going to get butchered by the fans, so if their anger reached it's peak, try to calm them down by granting the team you red carded a penalty.
There, hope I helped.
Give an immediate red card to all players as a cis-gendered tax, in order to avoid any privilege in the game.
>steal the kids halftime orange slices
>stick a couple in your mouth
>bite down during match on the orange slices and pretend to have a seizure
>soccer mom brings you to hospital
>on the ride tell her it was a ruse and you are going to eat out her ass
>go ass to mouth while still smelling fresh thanks to orange slices
Bruh it works every time
Don't give a rightful goal and the give a yellow or maybe a red card to whoever protest.
Whenever you blow for a free kick or penalty, insist that you be allowed to take them or you'll be unhappy and start handing out cards.
Give corners instead of goal kicks. Say the ball was deflected the slightest. As soon as the corner is taken, blow for a free kick to the defending team. Repeat this over and over. Will frustrate both teams, but neither will benefit from it and it'll ruin the game. 0-0 draw, just as Americans hate it
definitely call a few foul throw ins and give your best effort to disallow a good goal or two. If you're the line guy give as many phantom offside calls as you can. even better if you're the ref and don't have a line guy and you call it from 50 feet behind the play
If the goalie runs up to the edge of his goal box before throwing or kicking call a foul saying his hand went over the line
any free kick walls take 10 tiny steps to spot the wall really close
>>67402541
kek
Make it clear that you will give any call, if the players appeal intensively enough for it. They will notice it, and the match will derail into a competition of who can exaggerate every bit of contact the most, and players will react to a trip like they've just witnessed a chainsaw massacre
>>67402248
>give yellow to all players protesting
This
>>67401906
book players for taking free kicks too quickly
>>67401906
Constantly get in the way of players
Whenever someone scores a goal, run and celebrate with them.
give a goalkeeper a red card for denying a clear goalscoring opportunity when all he did was block a shot with his hands, and if the other team scores the resultant penalty, make him retake it until he misses
never call fouls against the scummiest player on the pitch
this will encourage him to go full murderball
give one player a yellow card for every single tackle he makes and never give him a red until you've given him 20 yellows by the end of the game, book anyone who protests it
every time there's a foul in the penalty area, call it as a free kick right on the edge of the box
swallow cum near the corner flag.
book someone for diving when they clearly didnt
red card the linesman for not running down the sidelines quick enough
>>67404958
make my dream come true!
>>67401906
Why Mauricio Macri as ref?
>>67401906
When somebody fouls, take them aside and give them a choice. They can either take the yellow or have a chance to get off without anything. If they choose to take the chance, crumple up the red card and place it in one hand then ball your other hand into a fist. Have him pick a hand. If he picks the one with the red, card him. If he picks the empty hand, let him go. Do as many times as you want.
>>67402941
this desu
stop the game when a clear goal scoring opportunity is happening for player safety and demand they all drink 5 cups of water. repeat
>>67402271
Would be a good post without the pic
show up with thick big dark glasses and a blind man's cane
Stop the clock whenever there's a stop in play.
>>67401906
Make some baseball call, like a balk or obstruction, with a stern look so it looks like you genuinely believe those things happen in football.
Make it a true semen slurping sport and force all the players to blow each other whenever there is a foul. And I do mean every player. You can also join.
