You are suddenly put in charge of the MLS. You have one goal: make soccer popular in the US. You are given complete freedom to change the rules, and a large amount of money to spend on whatever you want. How do you make soccer popular?
>>66586879
Video ref
Compulsory shoot-outs/extra time for ties
Life bans for diving
Minimal tackling/interfering with the person in possession of the ball allowed
>>66586906
>soccer for pussies the thread
For every goal scored the entire crowd gets a free Big Mac (c)TM (Sponsored by the Ministry of Health (c)TM)
>>66586921
Instead of just shitposting explain to me why those changes would be bad
Just put more violence in football and muricans will love it
>more ad breaks
>instant replay brought to you by Dunking Donuts™
>less than 20 games a season, most of which are fairly pointles due to playoffs
>more black players
Decades of propaganda on the country's most popular sports outlets.
>>66586934
>teams who know they can't win and play for a draw now have a chance to play for a draw and then win on penalties
Remove salary cap, bring in continetal competition parable to the champions league - MLS becomes the dominant league in the world. Problem solved.
>>66586990
>bring in continetal competition parable to the champions league
There already isbthe CONCACAF CL
>>66586879
I don't because soccer is gay as fuck
>>66586998
That will never come close to the draw of CL football. Every CONCACAF player dreams of hearing the champions league anthem.
Promotion/relegation
No salary cap
FA cup style competition
Try to invest in youth academys and amateurs leagues (Sunday league) etc.
>Name the league XLS
>Allow all tackles
>Allow fighting
>Allow roids
>>66586879
why do amerifats always want to change the rules?
I fix soccer.
I dump all of the money into a program to crank out better referees at every level of the sport
I would also institute a review board to hand out suspensions for dives/flops which earn cards and/or penalty kicks
>>66586879
>the MLS
Obviously none of you know the first thing
>>66586879
Invest more money in MLS academies and ban them from forcing families to pay money in order to play there. The pay-to-play system is fucking over our youth development, the kids who grow up playing soccer in the streets and the parks don't come from families that can afford to pay thousands of dollars for training.
>>66587353
He thinks anyone beyond him cares with NASLEL
>>66587485
Where would that money come from?
handballs are allowed
egg shaped ball
padding + helmets
>add one more ball
>no offside
>every goal means 10 points
>only animal names for clubs
>every footballer must wear a helmet
fixed
>each goal is worth 7 points
>after a goal is scored, instead of starting with a kick off, the opposition team can elect to take either a penalty, a free kick or a powerball penalty
>a standard penalty is worth 2 points, a free kick (with defensive wall etc) is worth 5 points and a powerball penalty is worth 7 points
>a powerball penalty is like an ice hockey penalty. player dribbles from the halfway line, but there's one defender as well as one keeper
This will ensure that its all action all the time. Except for the setup time for each event, ring which we can have a commercial break.
Matches will be high scoring, competitive and will be almost devoid of passing and long spells without ACTION to suit america's simple, add minds
>>66586879
"Soccer" is already popular in the USA OP and in 20/40 years when your population gets completely assimilated by southamericans it will be your number one sport.
Just make it another fucking football season. I am tired of watching faggots dive around in grass for 3 hours
>>66586879
Unbuild wall
Add three balls.
Checking allowed
Defense men can use hands
If there is a tie have a shootout
>>66586929
>Ministry
>yurocucks
>>66586934
Well the minimal tackling thing sticks out like a sore thumb...why?
Pocket the money spending a great deal of it on blow.
Apologize later on my inability to make it popular and go back to watching baseball.
>>66588325
>boreball
Gtfo grandpa
A goal for the losing team counts as two, so the only possible draw is 0-0
A 0-0 draw counts as a loss for both teams
20 minute penalty ban for diving, second offense punishable by a penalty for the other team amd a season long suspension for the player
The worst team in the league has to trade every single player they have or fire them after the season
>video reviews
>review board goes through games and gives out warning from flops, 2 - 3 warnings and the player faces a one game suspension
>get the matches to free channels and provide good quality HD streams
>no ads during gametime
>promotion/relegation
>invest in youth academies
>yellow card is now also a 5 - 10 minute penalty
Import mexicans.
Wait you already do that.
>>66588342
>A goal for the losing team counts as two, so the only possible draw is 0-0
Team A scores two goals
Team B scores one goal (counts as two because losing team)
Final result 2-2
You moron.
>>66588389
"Import"
Free college degrees to all the players even if they are dumb as a rock.
>>66588342
>so the only possible draw is 0-0
>>66588390
Remove our stupid fucking overly complex financial rules.
Delete drafts.
NCAA players can sign a contracts to begin when their collegiate career ends without invalidating their ncaa amateur status.
Move to regular season schedule. (Sept-may, include winter break because the northeast gets fucked by winter, undersoil heating required for all stadiums if it's not already)
Delete the MLS holding corporation, sell teams to owners individually.
Mandate an Olympics style u23/reserve league (ie. max 3 over 23 players named per match)
Delete playoffs, add more regular season matches.
Allow 4th sub in extra time of cup matches.
Nationalized TV deals run through league, local ones can be negotiated by teams but regional blackouts of games are not permitted.
Individual shirt/stadium/etc. Sponsorships negotiated by teams.
All star game in Los Angeles just before end of winter break.
All star vs. random team is now MLS Champions vs. random team.
End of season monetary rewards earned by placement, small bonus for top 3 teams by discipline (cards earned, r=3y)
Spend rest of money split between training referees in small local programs and Subsidizing club youth training programs.
1. Get rid of seperated conferences, keep the fixtures etc but make it 38 ,all the same, just make it a 20 team league and fuck off with the communist bullshit.
2. Team that finishes 1st wins the MLS
3. Make the MLS Cup in to something like the FA Cup and compete with all teams on the US and Canada pyramid.
4. Relegation and Promotion from the NACL or whatever it is.
5. Get rid of the draft, anyone graduating an academy or uni goes in to a free agency pot automatically, or recruited before hand by a clubs academy.
6. No salary cap.
7. Make winning the damn things interesting and worth it.
Literally fixed.
>>66588419
>>66588439
Why would getting rid of the playoffs make MLS more popular?
>>66588419
Also fuck off winter schedule shill
>>66588450
Why would you have a communist league where the top, and best team who have accumalated the most amount of points over the most amount of games not win the actual thing?
In Europe, everywhere, the play-off system is typically for teams below the eventual winners and / or runners up.
Take out the MLS play offs and you have an actual meaningful competitive league. If MLS fans are so attention starved as to have to go 'hope we make muh play offs', then you don't even deserve a league.
>>66588450
It won't immediately. The issue is that the rest of the world sees us as a retirement league, and deleting those will help us to be taken more seriously by younger players from other countries who are not used to playoffs.
Which, in turn, could help raise the level of play across the league.
Also because the fucking cup does the playoffs well enough.
Remove the salary cap.
Add a shot clock to each teams possession. ( no more then 3 minutes)
Make the goal slightly larger
Have a two point score line a good distance away.
Yellow cards are now 7 minute penalties
Yellow cards and random bullshit that takes an extended period of time stops the clock.
>no more of this "well we wasted about 6 minutes during the game so I'll let them to continue to play until I deem appropriate" bullshit
>>66588503
Time wasting is a viable tactic in proffesional football.
once the ball is past the halfway line, no passing back behind it
>>66588510
And you wonder why we think its so boring
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEiRE_-qdo8
>pocket all the money
>don't try to fix soccer because its gay
?????
>PROFIT
You would have better luck making lacrosse more popular in the US than fagtag. At least in lacrosse they beat each other with metal sticks, in soccer they literally just sit around kicking a ball.
>>66588510
FFS its a sport where wasting time is a major part of the game. Parking the bus is for faggots.
>>66588478
>Also because the fucking cup does the playoffs well enough.
"No"
>>66588477
>In Europe
Into the trash it goes
>>66588618
>everything in Europe is bad because it's in Europe
Why do you even want to fix MLS? Isn't it perfect for you already?
>>66588723
>fix MLS
No, rejecting thing because they're European is a bad idea too
But accepting them because they're European is the worse possible decision possible
>>66588797
You rejected what he said literally because
>>In Europe
>>66587033
>FA cup style competition
>Try to invest in youth academys and amateurs leagues (Sunday league) etc.
There's already the U.S. Open Cup and the league has been investing in youth academies.
>>66587715
That actually sounds awesome but it wouldn't change the core gameplay.
It would just add an interesting spectical after each goal but the normal game before a goal is scored would be the same.
>>66587733
Except none of our asshole immigrants watch MLS, they just watch the league from their home country.
This is so easy
1. Multi Ball
2. American flags plastered everywhere around the stadium
3. Innovative scooter access
4. Preferred seating for minorities
5. Main Sponsor: McDonald's. Free burger for every game attended
6. 15% discount at Walmart with a valid season pass card
7. Altar for prayer after a goal is scored
8. Monster truck half time show
>>66588813
I rejected it because his reasoning included "In Europe"
I don't care how they do it in Europe, we do it differently here
And by itself having no playoffs isn't as entertaining as having playoffs
Considering especially how compelling the past few MLS Playoffs were
Finals were shit but they usually are for everything
Invent a version of football called one-touch football, where the players are allowed to touch the ball only once. Make players play it all day long. Release superplayers onto the world.
Also, have an Atlantic Cup in years when there are no Euros/WCs. Have 8 MLS teams play against 8 middle tier Euro teams, like teams from Scandinavia, Benelux, Portugal, etc.
>>66588936
>3. Innovative scooter access
My sleep-deprived brain somehow transformer that into "Innovative scooter fortress" and I actually tried to envision that.
>all these geniuses suggesting that we play some fucked up derivative of soccer instead of just fiddling with the league
but there's nothing wrong with the game itself
>>66589013
>>66589013
>benelux
>lux
I don't think that's a Fair competition.
>>66586879
Shorten the field
Narrow the field
Penalty kicks have to be dribbled in from midfield
Kicked out of game for embellishment
Computer-generated extra time instead of arbitrary few minutes
>>66587006
Rude, but true.
Literally just a shotclock for possession and fining anyone who flops a huge amount
Every post before me not mentioning these two things are retarded
>american flags everywhere
>helmets
>TWO fucking balls
Jesus christ there is a reason this is only theorycrafting
Regional TV deals so each team's market can watch all the games on free TV
Get ESPN to cover MLS like basketball on sportscenter
Get rid of salary restrictions
Spend more money on young European players
Move the season to Spring and Summer
Create youth programs for all MLS teams
>>66586998
It's hard to get even MLS teams to care about CONCACAF CL. Alot treat it as pre-season. Not many people put much thought or effort into a tournament where you have to play on a pitch that's more mud than grass in some backwater town in Guatemala where fans throw bags of piss at you. Plus CONCACAF referees
>>66586965
the fact that you can play for a draw to begin with shows that soccer is shit
>>66586879
>Tell the NCAA to eat a bag of dicks
>bring over management talent from the Euro leagues
>offer money right out of HS to top prospects in America
>make the large market teams the ones worth watching.
Every time there's a goal fireworks go off and the US air force flies over the stadium
>>66588972
>we
What position do you play for MLS dick sucking FC m8?
>>66589372
We, as in the American society
>>66586879
But that's a terrible idea.
I'd fold the league 2bh.
Turn it into a futsal league.
>the style and speed of play is more attractive to Americans
>no more need for placing fields inside of baseball or football stadiums nor a need for new stadiums, just place them in basketball arenas
>much easier for inner city youth (ie = blacks) to find a place to play (more basketball courts than open fields)
Just market it to the youth like hell and you'll see America with a team of Falcaõs in the Futsal World Cup in no time. Also, the interest in futsal should increase the interest in soccer.
Where's my millions?
>>66587039
reminder that the future US president literally funded the XFL
>>66589274
They do
How?
It sucks but understandable
Why?
They do?
They already do
>>66589348
None of you understand how soccer works here now
>start every game with the american anthem
>all kits must incorporate the american flag
>section matches into 10 minute periods of gameplay, followed by 15 minutes of adverts and celebrity appearances
>penalty shootout at the end of every 10 minutes if its goalless
>unlimited subs incase players get tired
>every goal now equals 5
>more blacks
>more butslapping
>more cheerleaders with less clothing
>players now wear padding and helmets
>>66589788
No they don't
Give ESPN rights to show games at discounted rates if they cover MLs
So the quality of play is better
They play all the way through October, that's not summer
Sending your recruits to a college program is not a youth academy
>>66586879
MLS already has better attendance than the NBA and the NHL - and before you cite ticket prices, do the research and you'll see that the ticket prices are comparable, despite /sp/ having the long-outdated idea that MLS tickets are $5 or free or whatever.
Also, it is, overall, a profitable league.
So, soccer IS popular in the USA. It's just a hold-over perception from another decade that it is not.
>>66590178
Attendance means nothing because attendance is tied to the size of the arena. NASCAR sells hundreds of thousands of tickets.
The mlels gets fucking murdered by the Big 4, the NCAA, and probably NASCAR too where it counts: TV ratings.
>>66586879
My first act of business as commissioner is to dissolve the MLS and use the money to create a spring football league
>>66586879
encourage high school sports players to move from american football to football, that's the only way, keep hitting those parents with material about CTE.
>>66590211
The ratings are bad because nobody other than the fans of the two teams playing want to watch the nationally televised game each week. Who the fuck thinks any casual fan wants to watch two teams they don't care about play?
>>66586879
1. Add blocking.
2. Create a 50 yard zone in the center of the field that allows the players to pick the ball up and run with it until tackled.
3. Award 2 points per goal.
4. Extra point attempt after every goal to be taken from the foul line by the player that scores the goal.
5. Game goes into overtime until a team wins.
6. Introduce more refs and ban players that dive like faggots.
I'd do all of that, and then blow the money on booze and whores, because unless you change that boring, lame ass game, nobody is going to play it in the states but faggots, women, children, and foreigners.
>>66590147
Regional teams have the choice to
But it's not like that's the reason other leagues are """ struggling """
They already show MLS games
Too big of a risk
Their season is already nearly too short
Every team has an academy. College has already been nearly phased out
Most college players are foreigners anyway
Pay UEFA to give 8 slots from the UEFA Champions League to the MLS.
That's pretty much all I need. Consequently the stars will arrive and quality of league and worldwide interest will get better.
Also play all the MLS games at saturday and sunday 1pm and 3pm to get the European audience involved.
>>66586879
Use all the money i was given to make ESPN market it constantly
Easy peazy nigga
>>66586906
>Compulsory shoot-outs/extra time for ties
MLS originally had it and it was total shit
>>66590398
Why did they get rid of it?
Because the shoot-outs offered more action and entertainment than the entire game?
>>66590450
It didn't though
>>66586879
Dunking is allowed
>>66586879
I set up soccer programs in poor communities that help get kids into colleges, either on scholarships or at all. I'd subsidize small and medium sized college teams so that more of them could offer scholarships, and make substantial grants for upgrades to soccer specific stadiums and subsidize cheap tasty food and alcohol, with on-site legalized betting.
tl;dr make it attractive to poor kids as a way out of poverty and make it as cheap as possible to have a good viewing experience in a facility associated only with soccer.
replace all the males with women.
remove salary caps/foreign player restrictions
pay billions to everyone that plays football
all the young americans will want to play it to make money
