Anyone depressed?
I'm a diagnosed sociopath, so I can't really feel anything. Is that a yes?
>>23601270
no you just don't have sympathy for what others feel.
it's anti-depressants that make you not feel anything.
>>23601172
You should consider suicide.
>>23601270
Confirmed bullshit, as people with antisocial personality disorder do have emotions; they just lack empathy for others.
>>23601337
That's not how SSRIs work.
>>23601172
reporting in
>>23602004
well this was fun
Rip ;_;
yeah pretty depressed GF just broke up with me after 2 years. honestly just looking for anything to keep my mind of it.
kik: EasyTarget87
So depressed. Almost killed self yesterday due to being off meds. No talking to anybody, not doing any hobbies. Long time emotional pain. Staying up for 48 hours straight, plus staying up the past 2 nights until the sun came up.
Antidepressants have literally kept me alive. I've been depression/mentallillness since 2005 and have spent 2 months of my life in hospitals for trying to kill self. Some serious shit went down, and I'm surprised I'm still alive.
Everybody's always like, "burgalurgaluga...meds make you feel emotionless and stuff!" Dude, that is way better than sitting back and not doing the shit you enjoy, and keeping you alive.
What do you want to talk about?
>>23603517
Are you back on your meds?
>>23601172
I don't feel depressed so much as I feel unmotivated and tired all the time.
Unmotivated to do things like get a job, find new friends, and contact my old friends. And just general fatigue and tiredness all day.
I'll try to get on a medication for this. I probably can't get a job if I feel depressed and tired because employers can just tell that I'm a guy who never smiles and am tired.
>>23603556
I've been back on them for a few hours now, but it might take another 24 hours before they kick in. One of them makes me sleep all day, and I can barely balance if I wake up earlier in the day.
But yes, the medicine isn't going to fix the problems in my life, that's why I got into therapy. But still, I'm so scared by the things I've seen, been through, and think about people.
Shit gets better, and it's good to reach out. Also, fuck anybody who doesn't understand depression or bipolar disorder. Or any mental illness!
I am so in need of a friend, preferably someone that could find humor in the meaninglessness of existence. I need to talk to someone about my problems, and would love to hear their problems too. I just want to share an empathic moment with someone. I want someone to care about me, and I want to care about them too ;_;
>>23603595
Yes! Get on meds; you will feel better! All those things you listed are symptoms of depression.
>>23603630
I'll just leave my tox ID here in case anyone wants to discuss feels with me:
AF00206B2DF62664F4AA34BD3340CDDDF6405F00DFC61F0A370C04C04874101E5C2E32ACD6DB
Yes.
Living with friends that have taken my NEET ass in and I spend my time taking care of the dog, helping out a little bit with housework, hanging out with the kids, searching for a job in fastfood, cleaning and shit like that. They and their kids refer to me as part of the family which makes quite happy. Probably the first time I felt like a part of a family.
I havent spoken to or acknowledged my family in months and they keep sending me texts and fb messages. They mean well but all they do is go on and on about how I threw my life away and I cant handle that.
I used to go to my countries most prestigious law school. I studied rethoric and project managment before that. All to be able to be a corporate lawyer and earn the big bucks and spoil my future kids. We werent dirt poor but I couldnt do sports and we could never travel because lack of cash and I wanted to give better than that.
Got a bipolar fiance. Gave her more focus than my studies because I loved her. Grades went to shit. Had to drop lawschool. Got dumped day after she learnt of it because I lacked a future.
Mfw I realise I've become Joey in Full House.
>>23603618
I haven't been hospitalized, but a therapist ~4 years ago was going to commit me if there wasn't an improvement.
I found therapy wasn't particularly helpful, in my case. Mostly it was just being diligent about taking medication.
>>23603653
Lived on the streets for a while. Missing a front tooth. Cant get it fixed without a job, cant get a job looking like a junkie.
Etc etc
>>23603630
Have you tried joining a support group or reaching out to a friend who also has also been on some sort of medication or went through a struggle/currently struggling?
It can be tough to get into normal social situations sometimes, partially because people just don't understand what it is that you may be going through. But keep your head up! Hobbies or things that make you happy will help you grow.
>>23603672
I don't have the means to do those sorts of things. I'm turning 19 soon and still don't have a fucking drivers license. I made no friends in highschool. I'm fairly certain I won't make any friends in community college. You wouldn't understand, there is nobody outside of "online" that shares interests with me.
>>23603686
>there is nobody outside of "online" that shares interests with me
The beauty of it is that all of us online exist tangibly as well; it's just a matter of finding someone online who's also accessible in the real world.
>>23603686
3 years from 16 isn't that bad! Don't give up hope!
I can kind of relate. I'm 29. Don't have a car, job. I stay in a lot. People don't get my 4chan internet humor. Things that make me laugh are so silly! A girl hasn't been interested in me since I was about your age, and every single one has broken up with me or moved on. I'm an emotional wreck with not much of a life at all.
You could try joining an online support group, or try to start threads on the chan to try to talk to people who are going through the same things you're going through. We're out there, senpai!
>>23603707
Well it seems hopeless. People that share my interests are few and far apart.
>>23603716
What kind of online support group can I join?
Do you have any recommendations?
>>23603723
I don't really know of any online support groups, but I would highly suggest googling local mental health services around your area. They will have groups there who will meet up every week, talk about shit, give support. It's really great!
But yeah, maybe Google some online support groups for mental illness. But once again, real social interaction willl help you!
>>23603653
Can you do legal writing-type jobs remotely in order to get funds together?
I have a friend who does a bit of written translation from home in order to pay the bills.
And I'm sorry you got wrapped up with someone who wouldn't care for you in the same way you did for her.
>>23603630
Hey, I'd be willing to be your friend.
How can I contact you? Who knows, maybe we live near each other and could be friends irl!
>>23603876
contact me on tox, it's a p2p instant messenger, which means no third party can see the messages shared since they are sent directly from peer to peer.
I recommend qtox.
I posted my tox code here: >>23603646
27 now, diagnosed with bi polar and depression in third grade. I have been thinking of killing myself a lot lately. Life has just been on a decline for the past 4 years. I hate when people tell me it will get better. It's been 4 fucking years and I'm doing worse every day.
>>23603595
Almost same here. I curently have a job, but i can barely manage to work 4hours, these days just two hours a day. I have to find a new job, but i am not motivated, and could not manage to work for 8 hours a day.
~
Which meds would help? Psy* doctors are expensive in my country, I can't afford therapy.
~
I met a girl on /soc/ recently, i'm not sure if communication is going 100% good, but it is fine for now. She's so smart and kind, it pains me that we don't live in the sam country.
I'm turning 30 next week. I've had one serious relationship in my life. I have zero friends. I'm extroverted, and I worked for years to get to a financially stable, healthy lifestyle. I should be able to go out, make friends, and eventually meet the woman of my dreams, but it just doesn't happen.
People love or hate me, but I'm interested in niche enough things that it never really matters. They like Facebook, cars, and smoking weed. I don't. It fucking kills me inside knowing not a single person gives a fuck. I have no one to talk to, no one to vent to, nothing. I just can't handle this shit. I should be happy, and I be worked so fucking hard that I deserve to be.
When I was an edgy teen that hated everyone, I told myself I'd kill myself at 35. I don't think I'd ever think of doing anything so drastic, but I genuinely don't even understand what the point is anymore.
I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety about a year ago and put on medication. The meds worked great for a while, but eventually their effect began to lessen, until finally I was feeling about the same as before. The doctor told me I could start taking bigger doses if I want, but beyond that there isn't much to do. I really don't want to up the dosage, because I'm already getting some awful side effects, so I guess I'm just fucked.
I think I am?
I have no motivation to do anything, I still go to work and workout, but that's it. I feel empty whenever I talk to my friends and family or whenever I do things. I don't want to exist anymore but I don't know why.
I have no motivation to get out of the house or do anything, my friend drags me out sometimes to do stuff but she usually just ends up talking to some dudes and I sit in the corner on my phone or something
I cant even muster up the motivation to reply to my close irl friends anymore because talking to them tires me out, I used to have a really big group of online friends to come home to everyday but it fell apart and I miss it. 3-8 people in a call at any time playing games or watching youtube videos. sometimes I post my contact to try to make new friends but I just end up deleting it a few minutes later out of paranoia
>>23603595
me too bro
>>23603595
Im like this as well. Have hypothyroid. Get your thyroid checked. Srsly that shit can wreck up so much stuff in you that you wouldnt even think was related to it
yep, depressed and very lonely
>>23603630
"I want someone to care about me, and I want to care about them too ;_;"
pretty much everything that i crave in my whole life
My boyfriend of 3 years dumped me and refuses to even still fuck me "for my own good". Depressed and can't orgasm, it's like a special kind of hell.
>>23608793
Someone mentioned that to me the other day. I've never looked into it partly because my family does have a history of some sort of mental illness but are very quiet about it all. Catholics, if something is wrong hush it up and pretend everything is fine.
Sort of just venting, if nothing else bump. I hope all of you can find what works best and look up at the world and smile often :x
>>23611628
I have been really depressed and can't find anyone to fuck. I use sex the same way an alcoholic uses alcohol and a druggie uses drugs. It sucks.
>>23601172
Does my expression say yes, with a side of strained brained?
Hi fellow sad sads.
I don't know if I'm depressed.. But I don't feel good.
my gf of 3 years broke up recently and I never felt so incredibly sad in my life.
I really thought she was the one for my. my soulmate. Also she was my best friend since i can think.
That was like 4 month ago, and since that I lost alot of weight cause i dont have appetite anymore, I'm tired all day but still can't sleep at night. I don't feel like doing stuff with my friends cause I know that I just won't have fun and I would ruin their evening.
all I do all day is laying around and waiting for the day to end.
also my gf has a new guy and most of my friends always do stuff with them, while I sit at home alone and drink or smoke weed.
I often feel so alone and just have to start crying for no apperent reason. I wake up and I start crying, I dont even know why.
I just feel so alone, and I miss her so much.
I think I really just need a person I can love and spent time with. I need a girl that hugs me and loves me back.
>>23611769
I really know how you feel. My bf got rid of me and I know he'll find a new girlfriend so fast, and probably is fucking someone already. I just feel so sad and alone and pointless. We talked about getting married and living together and we never made it that far. Now he's going to school and will forget all about me.
On the bright side, I recently quit weed and honestly it makes a difference. I feel empty all the time and cry, but don't feel like I want to die. For me drugs of any kind really mess with my emotions. You should try not to medicate yourself so much. It will just make it worse.
>>23611723
I know how you feel. The worst part is it never makes you feel happy after, just empty.
>>23612003
we talked about marriage too. i feel you. its hard to get over it.
I always think, if I had some girl to have sex with it all would be esier and i could forget her. but getting to know other people is'nt easy for me. I' really shy and stuff like that.
i will try to. but when i'm high is really the only time i can forget about all that stuff.
>>23612059
I think the exact same stuff. I only really feel comfortable and can enjoy sex with someone I know very well, and since finding even a true friendship is hard in this world it feels like I'll just have to live alone forever. Calling a convent right now, lolz jk bleh
The full physical withdrawal for me took about a month so it's hard, but worth it in the end. I definitely understand your feelings though. Sometimes the pain is so bad you need to just run away from it all.
>>23612121
same here. had ONS a few times, but its just not for me. have to get really drunk to even have sex with a stranger cause like i said, im shy and not really confident. and drunk sex sucks.
hang in there! maybe i will quit soon too.
>>23612007
So true. I only cum half the time from sex. It's kind of sad.
Hi everyone, I am fuckin low right now.
Since a year now, I suddently lost all interest I could have in everything.
I don't have any positive or negative feeling at all now.
Mostly negative, in fact ...
I'm seeing a psychotherapist, but we don't really find a way to get out of this shit.
Every morning is a struggle to get the fuck up a retrieve some interests in things.
Anybody been through that ?
And sorry for bad english, I'm french and drunk.
>>23612400
Sorry to hear you're going through that. I'm currently going through that now so I can't really help, I'm good to chat however.
>>23612450
Yep, what's your story ?
>>23612459
Well I was diagnosed with depression 8 years ago, there's been some hiccups. Lately I think I've getting worse because of a fucked up situation with my dad. Waking up is always a pain.
So how about yourself?
>>23612481
Anything you care about in life ?
For me, I have nothing to complain about ...
An appartment, a girlfriend, a Metal band, a good computer, a job, some friends...
But all of a sudden, everything I used to care for had no meaning for me anymore : making people dance in a concert, making music, making DIY electronic circuits, spending time with friends, social games parties ...
All these disappeared for no reason ...
I had, one year ago, a entire month where I was busy every hour of every single day. Maybe it's the aftermath ?
>>23612529
I love my dogs and my close friends, that's about it.
I feel like depression doesn't require a rough life situation, just because your life isn't totally shit doesn't mean you can't feel exhausted. Do you have existential depression by any chance?
>>23612561
What is existential depression ?
I feel like shit every single second of my life (since 1 year) even though I know I can make gold with my hands !
>>23612572
Being aware of the inevitability of your death. I suppose it could make one think there's no point or at least feel insignificant.
How do you make gold with your hands?
>>23612587
>How do you make gold with your hands?
I mean I am quite gifted with things and I can learn quickly
I am aware of my death, it doesn't scares me, (and I played The Talos Principle, I recommend it to anyone in this crisis !).
I am more sensitive with the overpopulation, maybe that's what fuck me up ...
Are you on medication ? And is it effective, if yes ?
>>23612608
Talos principle has been on my wishlist for a while, I might get it.
Overpopulation is quite an issue, I think there's enough resources globally to support 14 billion people or so. I think the main problem is that families in worse situations have more kids so they can look after them when they're old, that and there's a higher mortality rate. However this is all from a geography class from years ago so my memory is hazy.
My medication hasn't helped me at all, only I get withdrawals should I forget to take it for a few days. I have an appointment with a psychiatrist next month to see if he'll suggest anything else, maybe I'm too hopeful.
Does your girlfriend help you with your depression?
take LSD
“I searched for God and found only myself. I searched for myself and found only God.”
― Rumi
>>23612646
Do you recommend it from personal experience?
Yup I've been passively suicidal for as long as I can remember and nothing in my life has ever worked out for me including medication "if it wasn't for bad luck I'd have no luck at all" honestly im just not fit to be a human I don't want to pass down these shittu genes no child should be born just to suffer even if it's all just mental
I romanticiz suicide and often wish I had the courage to do it but like most things in life I'll find an excuse not to such as hope religion and not wanting to spread the pain I carry eh
>>23612663
Maybe it's not so much that you want to die, it's just that you seek an escape. That's my situation.
I can totally relate to the having kids thing, it would be my biggest fear if I was a parent.
>>23612646
I've done lsd and like a dream it can be an amazing escape from reality but for the rational mind that's it is a dream an illusion of spiritual and mental grandure if you can believe the lie it may help god knows I try to but I honestly don't think it is a cure to any mental illness (minus those chronic headaches from he'll some people get) but it is a fun time and can improve other things like your imagination
>>23612643
I know that's unsafe, but I want to keep her away from this.
She knows I'm not well, but I think she doesn't know how bad I really am.
Nobody's too hopeful, just don't give up trying things, you have nothing to lose (except some money ...) :)
With my therapist, we are getting to a dead end, so I'll try other things : sport, meditation, art-therapy ...
>>23612702
My ex was pretty supportive, she had anxiety issues as well so we could relate in that way. I doubt it would be a bad thing to tell your girlfriend, but you know your situation better than I do.
I'm glad you're optimistic to get better, probably the best attitude to have.
>>23612698
True escape is really the goal and I'm at the point where even nothingness like the state where in before birth and most likely after sounds amazing
I want to disspell some myths about depression. /soc/ doesnt know what it is.
youtube.com/watch?v=jC7MyPiI5Mo
>>23612726
Accurate as fuck but there are different versions of depression not all being chronic and personally I believe normies for lack of a better term can get it as well but allot of people do confuse sadness with depression and this video explains what it truly is quite well
>>23612726
>>23612783
Well there's major depression, from what my psychologist told me it's a more intense depression but shorter lived than a chronic depression.
>>23612783
Yup there's also sporadic(it's not called this but I forgot the scientific term) bipolar 1 and 2 and probably more I haven't read about or that have yet to be defined
Depression is just a chemical imbalance in the brain basically one of our cogs is fucked up permanently it doesn't mean that only we feel this way because of the chronic nature of our disease some times others cogs will fuck up as well usual do to there environment and not there birth right
Just like how we all get angry from time to time but don't have anger management issues or whatever the clinical term is
pretty sure I'm depressed, chronic, probably fairly mild though.
doctor said blah blah blah, have this blood test and if it's ok come back for another appointment and fill out this questionnaire about how sad you are.
blood test came back mostly ok, said something was a bit high but wouldn't cause "your symptoms" but idk.
bit weird to hear anything wrong because I'm super healthy and when I'm not on a low I work out like crazy but meh.
Been on a low for a few weeks now, with a cold not really helping.
>>23612657
Yes, but do your research, The Psychedelic Experience is essential and only a 2 hour read
>>23612699
>for the rational mind that's it is a dream an illusion of spiritual and mental grandure
See what you think of some Alan Watts lectures,
>>23612893
I've done my research and practiced it myself I'm not going to watch a docu or read an article or book about how a chemical derived from wheat fungi is anything more then just that it's by no means supernatural or a cure for depression imo
>>23612914
Now I could see it being used to manipulate some ones subconscious into to believing things that can be very beneficial basically having the placebo effect on a mind that's completely let its guard down but by no means is it a cure
I believe it's Sweden that or Norway who's trying to kick start a project to prove people like me wrong so well have to wait and see where that goes
>>23612914
Oh and sorry for all the salt but I'm generally pissed that it's not a supernatural/phycological cure since I thought like you before I practiced
>>23612914
>chemical derived from wheat fungi is anything more then just that
what are you putting down here?
that it is a chemical?
or that is derived from wheat fungi?
are you
'just' a bag of meat and bones then
'merely' chemical reactions
'only' a few pounds of grey goo
or are you something more?
I find it very typical of materialists that they actually very subtley hate the material, they never realise how much they put themselves down, I love the material, every bit of it is a wonder of consciousness, wheat funghi included
>>23605237
What do you do for a living? Any close friends/loved ones?
Is there a reason why they made that kind of diagnosis so early? Obviously it's accurate if you're still in that state, but it seems strange to begin with.
>>23606148
>I genuinely don't even understand what the point is anymore.
Unsolicited input: The hardest part is finding a reason, because despite what society conveys, there is no inherent purpose to existence. It's not an obligation unto itself, and I think one of the worst ways the mental health system betrays its wards is by suggesting we are obligated to suffer existence because to do otherwise would be to irrevocably upset a community to which we are indebted.
You do. Deserve more, that is. The fact you can even acknowledge this infers you have more life in you than you think.
So take it.
>>23612968
Sounds like you've done zero research on the science behind lsd
>just' a bag of meat and bones then
'merely' chemical reactions
'only' a few pounds of grey goo
or are you something more?
Oh where allot fucking more then that where extremely complex machines brought about by chance evolution and maybe even alien intervention aka god or other theories like that
Where fucking atoms that are collective and conscious that alone is fucking incredible but you don't need to dumb us down with magic and the supernatural to appreciate our complexity
You're like our ancestors who thought we would become possessed when we drank and that's how intoxication worked also that's why spirits are called spirits
Just because you don't understand doesn't mean it's magical
>>23612968
>>23613022
Oh sorry I misread that as puffing not putting and glossed over the rest because of it I thought you didn't actually know lsds origin for a second
>>23613022
>Just because you don't understand doesn't mean it's magical
Just because you do understand does not mean it is not magical
>>23613141
Lol alright we should stop derailing this thread with your opinions and my facts
>>23601172
>gf of 5 years broke up with me
>still a virgin
>can count the number of times i got a bj or handy on 1 hand
little depressed yeah
>>23613181
Why where you together for 5yrs without having sex I could see that when it comes to a platonic a sexuel couple but come on now man what's the deal
>>23613196
she was raised christian (so was i) and she felt all guilty after physical contact. im cool with pre marital sex and i intended on marrying her, so i really didnt see a problem with is fucking. note, she would talk a big game, but when it came to the act she flaked. like to the point of crying.
>>23613196
we were together for so lon because i loved her, if thats what you were asking.
>>23613222
>she flaked. like to the point of crying.
Damn that's some shitty psychological conditioning
Sorry for your lose just think of the silver lining thouh I know it's hard but you can always upgrade and you sound like a sweet guy for staying chaste for a girl so I'm sure you'll do fine
>>23613304
im 6'1 and 230 pounds and ugly. im not getting anyone. will post pics of self
>>23613331
I don't think you look ugly (no homo).
And for chicks you're a step above a manlet, quite literally :^)
>>23613328
Lol stfu you are by no means unattractive and girls like bigger guys you're just down on yourself atm hopefully it will pass
>>23613336
>a step above
barely. you have to be 6'4 to even be allowed to breed.
>>23613337
>girls like bigger guys
bigger as in muscles. im built by no means. and my dick is small too. only 6 inches.
guess i should start lifting with /fit/ bros.
>>23613346
Lol that's actually one of the biggest lies around most girls are even to intimated by muscular guys to want to approach them sure if you had muscles you could pick up some fine ass stacys but would you even want to date a stacy (it's like girls thinking guys only want skinny blondes)
Also 6 inches is slightly above average quit watching so much porn :p
haha me
>>23613222
> but when it came to the act she flaked. like to the point of crying.
Sex would have been terrible, even after wedding. That's the kind of reaction from a rape victim who see penises as traumatising.
I don't know if it counts but I've been losing a lot of sleep recently because I am too scared of being alone with my thoughts, so I have to constantly distract myself and stay awake long enough that I wont have to lay in bed quiet by myself for too long or I start thinking again, its been getting really tough.
Is it still in denial if I know I'm pretending that all consuming dread, the lump in my throat, the constant need to cry, and the complete and utter lack of energy just aren't things? I was worse I guess. Use to lay in bed and stare out the window at the bay and wonder how it'd feel to drown in it for hours. If I wasn't I was probably sleeping. Now at least I'm managing a job, but then again I like the people I work with, the elderly always seem to know what to say so you don't feel so dead inside.
Everything is muted. I feel inert, passionless. All my effort is directionless and I feel like I am sleepwalking through a life of stifling boredom.
