/Tea/time thread
Whats going on folks, talk to me, tell me about your day. Hows life? Relationship going well?
everytime i wake up and piece together i have to spend another day alone, i instantly regret it. i wake up at 5:30am every morning, drink a coffee, go for a run. by 6:30am, i'm depressed again. my happiness is literally momentary. i smoke a joint, i feel about 10 minutes of what feels like pure, euphoric bliss. i think sometime soon i'll do a huge dose of shrooms that'll hopefully either be the final nail in the coffin, or by some miracle free me of all my vices.
>>23519698
Sounds like some form of mild depression. Do you see doctors?
I'm male, I'm a femboy but I've always had doubts about my gender. I've always kinda ignored this problem but these last days this doubts hit me like a truck and I ended up crying. I don't know if I should start taking hormones or just stay a femboy. It's weird. I feel like I'd like to be treated like a woman but I don't wanna lose my indentity. What do you think?
I like this thread.
I'm becoming more and more depressed as college is coming to an end (currently a senior). I feel like it's going to be much more difficult to be social, especially with women. I don't have a job lined up, so i'll be living at home for a bit
I don't know if I'm purposely fucking up at my job to give them a reason to fire me so that I can have another reason to hate myself or that actively hating myself every time I wake up has tired me out to the point where I'm making mistakes at all.
>>23519676
I'm not jaded about relationships, I swear. But for the life of me I can't find a girl whose intelligent enough for abstract philosophical debate and conversation, attractive enough for me to want to have sex 1-2 times a day with, undamaged enough to be able to express ourselves completely in public and private without reservation and upstanding enough to want to have a career, but be willing to let me provide and her to live an active social life and perhaps one day raise children.
It's a ridiculously high standard to want to be able to have dinner with my parents, catch an arthouse or B-movie, have passionate wild sex then discuss the nature of self-improvement as it effects or concept of ourselves while we cuddle and slowly drift to sleep; but that's what I want and I don't see why I should short myself. I truly want to give and take in a relationship, help each other become better people.
I just turned 30 and I just don't know if it's something I can even find anymore.
OP here, surprised this thread is still alive. I'll reply in a bit.
>>23520609
Hmmm, well to be honest it sounds like something inside you wants to be fem. And if thats the case maybe you should take the hormones. I guess the question is what is your identity actually?
>>23520623
Whats your degree field? Being social takes many forms. What about it exactly are you concerned about? Not seeing different people on a daily basis? That sort of random interaction? Or just the prospect of being able to meet people often? Does living at home scare you?
>>23520634
It sounds like you're really struggling with your own identity or direction. Its easy for use to go on self destructive rants, even when the effects don't seem like they are that bad. Do you feel like you know who you are? What is it you want to do with yourself?
>>23520713
I don't think that what you want per se is unrealistic, but more about how specific you are. Relationships take time, and shit tons of honesty and communication, and thats something people just don't get a lot of these days. I can count on hand the number of completely honest relationships I have seen in other people. What you want is more or less foreign to people, we're just not allowed to be how we all want to in this society. What you're looking for is totally attainable, but you'll just have to look for a bit and vet through the people who just aren't what you're into.
Are you part of the tea group on shutinnetwork.com? Are we here to talk about tea
This is a post.
>>23521864
I am not a part of the network, but by all means, let's talk about tea. What's your favorite? I'm a Chai man myself, or whites.
I've been in a rut for the past two years or so. I am currently halfway through my graduate program, but I haven't been feeling as motivated as I would like to. Don't get me wrong, I was excited to start graduate school, but the timing of life events have made this an experience quite difficult to succeed in. I was dumped one week prior to starting my grad program after being in the relationship for six years. I have been amicable with my ex since then, who has been suffering from depression for a while. I have feeling towards him, but I do harbor resentment after he cheated one me during the relationship. I tried my best to help restore the relationship following the incident, but with no avail. I've been feeling quite lonely for last year or so, trying to foster friends and relationships that I lost during the last seven years. I want deep connections with people, but it has been quite difficult. Most days than not I feel like I'm dragging my feet to get my life together and try to be more financially and emotionally independent. I'm hoping that I am able to make a few lifestyle changes to motivate me to get over my rut and my loneliness.
hi op, how's it going? consecutive all nighters suck, i can barely focus myself today.
>>23519676
I'm emotionally stabilizing, feeling kind of hurt over a girl. Had a rough week. Bad pic but whatever. She went from telling me to sit next to her on a couch (when I was like two feet away), bringing up places for us to go over spring break, and talking to me for four hours to basically kind of avoiding me. She told me she's afraid of relationships but idk if it's that or if doesn't want to give me any ideas she likes me. Idk. It hurts a lot. Any advice?
I love my job and I have great friends and a dog and hobbies that I enjoy but I'm afraid I'm never going to be in love with anyone
I'm not bad looking, I'm just really dumb, my brain doesn't work right
my head is full of good things but once guys realize how stupid I am they get annoyed with me, I don't know what to do with this and now I think I'm too old to be so inexperienced
>>23521996
Can I ask what your program is? I understand the the attempt to reconcile the issues with the relationship. But I want to say you're better off without him. Good things come and go, he probably did good things for you but that ships passed, and now you need to do good things for yourself. Its hard to find motivation, its hard to do whats best for you, but you have to learn how to pay yourself before you pay others. Think of this as your time now, take it slow, but you have to do whats best for you. As for making deep connections with people, what about it is difficult?
>>23522033
I'm well, went to the gym today, and then ate some good foods. Are you working nights or just studying? Whats going on?
>>23522048
Hmmm, this is pretty tough stuff here, I guess I gotta ask what exactly it is you want with this girl? Are you interested in a relationship? It sounds like you are but I'm just gathering the factuals here. Does this women seem like someone you would actually want to spend time with? I mean part of me says cut your loses or something, but sometimes you have to work hard for a good thing. Relationships are tough and opening doors with people can really work out. I guess you have to do what you think is best, how old is she? I have to say that honesty is something thats super important, same with communication. There appears to be a massive block in communication here, I mean theres so much up in the air as it seems.
>>23522104
Is that what you want? To fall in love with someone? You need to understand something here, no one is smart. Its okay to be dumb, I'm dumb as shit, I'm a nobody, I don't know anything, and everything I say is probably wrong. But sometimes talking and expressing shits thats wrong is best, because then you can get closer to whats right. Having a head full of good things is whats important, and it seems that you simply haven't found the right group of people to seek out. How old are you? What is it you want in a guy? How are you meeting people? Online? In bars? You simply need to build a foundation to find whats best for you.
31/m
Moved into my own apartment at the beginning of the month after living with my mom for the past year and a half. I have two jobs and while neither one of them pays particularly well or is something that I want to make a career out of, they pay the bills.
Relationship wise I'm pretty much starting from scratch. Never had a girlfriend and the only dates I've been on were with one girl a few years ago. Part of me tells me it's too late for me because I'm in my 30s but the other part tells me I should at least try while I'm still (relatively) young.
>>23522911
>Is that what you want? To fall in love with someone?
I want to love and be loved
>no one is smart. Its okay to be dumb
you don't get it
I don't understand things that normal adults do. I don't function on the same level as the normal people.
>>23523449
Don't let shit get you down, I mean I know things can seem awful sometimes. I've had my fair share of unfortunate events and lackluster periods, but its about finding ways to make yourself happy in the everyday moment. This might sound dumb but have you tried online dating? Tinder or okcupid? There is always people out there worth meeting.
>>23523477
>I don't understand things that normal adults do. I don't function on the same level as the normal people.
And thats fine, there are good men out there for you. Not everyone is terribly interested in smart people. There are men out there to legitimately want to enjoy someones company. Finding them, thats what you gotta do.
>>23519676
Overall, things aren't going all too well. I am a recovering drug addict, and I recently made a big move in my life, and it changed completely but I am having a hard time to adjust, and overall shit just has me down. I thought I found some friends online but it it ended up with them talking to me for sexual stuff only, and that just made me feel like crap. I just would like to find someone who wasn;t going to try and make things sexual between us, it just seems impossible.
>>23523693
I downloaded Tinder for the hell of it but I'm not expecting much. Like I said, I'm pretty much starting from scratch (basically KV) and had to struggle to find enough photos of myself to fill out my profile. Might have more luck with OKCupid or something.
>>23523715
Well first off I want to say that its good to hear you're making changes and doing your thing to recover. I cannot imagine the difficulty of that, so go you. I'm sorry to hear that they only wanted sexual things, sometimes people just have ulterior motives, and its never fun to want to connect with someone but them having someone else in mind. But I assure you its not impossible, its just trial and error unfortunately. But I can understand wanting what you want. Its good to just have people to talk to and connect to, its important to be able to get things out there and not have to worry. How are you meeting people online? Through here? /soc/?
>>23523802
I'll be honest with you, I meet a lot of people using tinder, I find that its just better when trying to connect with people who are also looking to get to know others. Just give it time, I'm sure you'll meet some good people.
>>23519676
nice mug, did you make it?
>>23524208
Shit no, I'm not creative.
Made by OCPottery
>>23524220
ah fair enough, i've got a super beautiful mug a fellow ceramist gave me, it's my favorite to drink coffee from in the morning
>>23524247
That sort of shit is nice isn't it? I'm a tea nerd and I have a few mugs like this one that I really like to drink out of. One of those things that just picks me up during the day.
>>23524260
aghhhh that glaze is beautiful
I get nerding out on tea, i'm similar with coffee and ceramics. part of japanese aesthetics deals with surrounding oneself with beautiful objects to improve the quality of life, and I relate to it more as life goes on.
>>23524320
I agree, it's just a nice addition to the flavors.
>>23524335
in tea ceremonies, the teaware is super important to the process, it exemplifies values like modest beauty, the value of experience and age, and utility.
but yeah it all feeds into the good vibes of that little ritual. I have a favorite coffee shop where they make dynamite espresso, i go there and draw pictures to get my head together before i start my day
>>23520713
Don't know if you'd be open to meeting someone online. I am a femanon and younger than you by a bit. You sound like an interesting guy, and it sounds like we want the same things. If you post your kik I will add you, if you want to chat.
>>23524351
Thats some zen shit right there brother. I just go to name brand tea places. Haven't found any fancy shit near me yet.
Tfw when you're a permavirgin bcuz you have ED :(
