Anyone In polyamorous relationships? Wanna share your experiences?
>>23005427
I'm not currently, but I've been in a few in the past. It's a lot of work if you want it to work out at all.
>>23005427
I'm bi, but I can never get down with bi porn. Shit fucking weirds me out.
*SHAMELESS BUMP*
>>23005584
Was there something you were curious about with them, or something?
My girlfriend and I are in a poly relationship, but so far it's just the two of us. Every person we've talked to (either together or individually) eventually just stops responding. No hints of negativity, no arguing, no complaints, they just slowly stop responding over time. It's really frustrating to both of us.
>>23005625
I'm merely curious about the relationship dynamics and how hard it is to maintain a relationship with multiple people. Been thinking about getting involved in a polyamorous relationship for a while.
>>23005710
Well, in my experience it's pretty hard. Time, and how you split it up between partners, is the biggest issue. There's also the problem of what happens if you like one partner more than another. All of it can lead to jealousy and you have to spend a lot of time and energy communicating to everyone.
Honestly, as my advice, is that if you structure the relationship within the slightly more rigid bounds of a D/S thing, it becomes much easier to manage expectations.
>>23005427
Was in a three way relationship for a year or two. It's a lot of communication and difficulty. You can't get jealous of time spent alone too
>>23005566
Finding decent bi porn is actually pretty difficult. It usually devolves into either gay/straight porn with some random guy/girl just awkwardly looking at two people having sex.
>>23005710
I'm dating an older woman who's poly while I fuck around on the side.
All I can say is that I'm not getting intense emotions involved. She's a friend that I can fuck, and we both know it's likely a short term arrangement.
Really I just look at it like a fwb situation. I just don't care what my lovers are up to when they're not with me, as long as they don't humiliate me or give me a dose.
I don't think it's something I'll stick with for all that long... I don't mind monogamy and I'm finding casual dating to be sort of a hassle--I just don't want to settle down with the first decently attractive woman who lifts her skirt for me like I have in the past.
The only long term poly arrangement I can see holding onto is a three way thing with two women, or a one sided deal where I discretely keep a mistress. Sounds a little selfish, but I won't love a woman who needs multiple men in her life.
>>23005890
My ex and I discussed sharing a gf but it never happened. Still pretty salty about it.
Me and my gf have the occasional FMF threesome, but we want to try a poly relationship with another girl, preferably a chubby with juicy tits and an honest mind, to kind of take her in as "our" girlfriend
It's not just about sex, it's about wanting someone else to love as well, someone to share our home with
>>23006100
I'm jelly. My ex is into girls, but didn't want to "use" someone by having a one-off threesome. It was either soulmates or GTFO.
I travel for work often enough that I'd love a wife and a shared gf living under the same roof to keep each other company.
I tried this but found I just don't share well. it killed me the night I asked my girl if I could come home with her one night at a party and she said she already had plans to bring another guy home. It didn't last much longer after that.
I guess you could call my wife and I poly.
We mostly play separately though so I usually just say we have an open relationship.
>Local guy hits me up on growlr
>I have on my profile that I am into puppy play and lots of other fetishes like chastity devices
>we chat, he asks me about pups, I tell him about the leather club I'm in, we hit it off
>don't talk for a month or so
>talk again
>this goes on for I don't know how long
>finally just come out and ask if he wants to meet up
>meet at starbucks, hit it off like crazy. We're both into all kinds of music, mostly metal (he's a classically trained concert bassist apparently)
>end up running by his house because it's two minutes away.
>talk for a few hours
>end up in his bedroom
>on my knees in front of him, getting WAY too horny, have been locked up for like 5 days at this point and just need a dick to play with
>rub my nose in the wet spot on his jeans, beg like a good puppy for his cock
>get to worship his cock for a while
>phone rings, wife texted me and is worried I got murdered
>decide it's a good time to stop.
>last night
>he comes over to meet the wife and we go to eat
>feel like I'm bringing my boyfriend home to my parents
>we get home and wife goes to bed. She's newly preggers and didn't feel good
>get right to it
>nose in his crotch, wagging my tail
>whips out his cock
>finally.jpg
>9 days worth of chastity has turned me into a little piggy bottom
>rubbing his precum and my saliva all over my face while going from his cock to his balls
>love that smell all over me
>beg like a good puppy, ask him to mark his territory
>he starts stroking
>I go back down and smell his musk while I take his balls in my mouth
>finally comes, sprays all over my mouth and chin
>have him take a picture
>next morning, wife wakes up early to do some chores
>text her the picture
>hfw
>>23005427
Been in a long-term open relationship for awhile now. We've discussed polyamorous stuff, not something we're totally against, but also not something we're actively searching for. Finding the right person would be key.
>My first poly relationship
>Ended due to massive jealousy
>My second
>Ended due to one girl getting afraid of the social stigma and bailing
>Friend's poly relationship
>Exploded because of jealousy
>Other friend's poly relationship
>Imploded because of typical relationship bullshit being compounded by being between three people instead of two, and if two can't agree on something why would three?
I've noticed a pattern that these don't tend to work. I've never seen one work irl.
Never been in any kind of poly relationship, but I'm dating/living with a chick who is open to it. I considered it, but it sounds like a messy idea. This thread pretty much confirms my initial thoughts. Just the thought that she'd be ok with it makes me want to back away.
>>23006787
It takes a LARGE amount of maturity.
Most people can't handle it, honestly.
>>23006554
it's obviously meant for more intelligent people desu. You have to be wicked smart, self-aware, and understanding to make these work out. they're not for the weak minded/spirited/disciplined.
>>23006554
Most relationships in general dont work. Just because you've seen 4 fail doesn't really mean anything. It's too small a sample size
>>23006852
>>23007429
I think beyond maturity, a genuine desire for all parties to participate in that kind of relationship and establishing that from the start are key. I've heard a lot of stories about a bf/gf bringing it into a monogamous relationship after months or years and that never seems to end well.
>>23006852
Now that just sounds pretentious. Relationships in general take intelligence, self-awareness and understanding. Any relationship that lacks that are in a bad place, poly or otherwise.
>>23007499
I'm not being pretentious, I'm just saying that if you and your partner aren't mature and communicate effectively it is doomed to fail.
It's like taking a regular monogamous relationship and multiplying all the little problems and quirks by a million.
Most of the people you hear from who had "poly" relationships that didn't work are younger, and I imagine the maturity level of all involved parties is to blame.
Unicorn hunters get a lot of shit in the poly community, but that's so ideal to me. I actually want to be a secondary to a couple. That really gets me off. So much more relaxing too.
My issue I've found though is that people are either too far away, or they just want me for the threesome and not for any of the romantic or emotional stuff.
Since I've never progressed with a couple, I haven't hit the issues I hear people talk about. Like apparently some couples want their +1 to not have any other partners? What? I've also heard about couples who don't let their +1 spend individual time with each person. The +1 has to see both of the others, never have sex with or even go on a date with just one. Sounds weird.
Right now I have a long distance fuck buddy. We just hook up when we're in the same town. It's nice. I don't know if he has other partners since it's been a while since we talked. I'd hope so, he's a horn dog.
I'm in a poly relationship! ask me whatever you'd like.
>>23007770
How many people are involved? Is is hierarchical? How long have you been doing this? What's something you learned about poly relationships that you didn't consider when you started it? Do you introduce everyone to each other? How did you meet like minded people?
>>23005649
This. So much this. I don't think it's just for those of us in open relationships. I think people are just for coke and have terribly short attention spans these days. If you don't meet up or keep interest early on it flames out quickly.
>>23008128
People are fickle* not for coke. Fucking auto correct.
I'm in a poly relationship and it's working out great. We both have sex with hot people on swingers sites. Not sure why people are having negative experiences.
kik me if you're a bi dude or girl, let's have some fun: mavin310
So much unicorn hunting.
I'm kind of doing a solo poly thing at the moment but I've three partners that I see with varying regularity - one is pretty much constant. In that dynamic she has a primary partner of about seven years, and we've been exploring our dynamic together. It's pretty fucking great.
I might reactivate some of my old partnerships. Don't know. I had a reaaaaaally bad fallout from my last primary partner and I've been largely hermiting it up and keeping to myself versus my standard sluttery.
Been doing poly for a couple years - generally I am a relationship anarchist, but went hierarchical poly with last partner. That blew up and been doing low key / secondary arrangements because it's low pressure.
What do people want to know?
>>23007858
Going to steal questions here since bored and this is broad spectrum.
>>How many people are involved? Is is hierarchical?
I've three partners, more or less. Combining this question since easiest.
Partner 1 - She has a primary; boyfriend of seven years. It's untyped, but we are exploring me as a secondary. Largely sexual / affection, little romance.
Partner 2 - Has a boyfriend of half a year. We are all friends, this is mainly a group sex thing. I toy with her randomly as she's super responsive and I can make her squirt from non genital stimulation. I exist outside of hierarchy.
Partner 3 - She's single, we fuck and go on dates. But is crazy busy so I rarely see.
>>How long have you been doing this?
Three years? Started in a kind of messed up way.
>>What's something you learned about poly relationships that you didn't consider when you started it?
Just how the function. I've improved my communication a lot.
>>Do you introduce everyone to each other?
Not really. Lots of similar circles though. Previous primary and I were super quiet about it, and Partner 1 and I are quiet about it. Close friends know but otherwise no.
That being said outside of specific people being kept quiet, I'm not secret about it - I just don't go around talking about people needlessly. People tend to know who I'm with as most people assume I'm fucking anyone I spend time with, or bring out to social occasions.
Only primary partners tend to know -everyone- I'm involved with, but that's more because happy story swaps. Usually only check in if there's potential issues like close friends.
>>How did you meet like minded people?
I know a lot of alternative and sex positive people. Plus I run in a lot of kink and fetish circles.
Also people tend to direct their friends to me for someone fun/safe to date or fuck.
At this point it's kind of self perpetuating - I am a compulsive flirt, people know that, and I follow the campground rule.
Love this thread. We're a 31/27/23 MFF committed polyfidelious triad in LA, though we still play with kinky girls on occasion (pic related). Happy to chat, here or on kik at LaserJesusBeard
I'm in a poly with it being four gay men total.
is it poly if she's a prostitute? it's like 100+ partners 100x the fun c:
>>23009428
Only if you're an idiot.
>>23006852
>maturity
Oh my sides, being polyamorous is like the least mature thing you can do. How do you find it a mature thing to Fuck who you want when you want regardless of anyone else feelings? That's called degeneracy not maturity.
>>23009777
>How do you find it a mature thing to Fuck who you want when you want regardless of anyone else feelings?
You don't exactly understand poly, do you.
Fuck I am not even a poly person and I understand it more than you.
>>23009780
I understand it completely I'm just tired of people saying it's so mature when in reality it is the farthest thing from mature.
>>23009777
That's also not poly. But please, keep believing you're right and everyone else isn't. Unshakeable faith without experience is definitely a sign of maturity.
>>23009786
You don't understand it at all if you think the sexual aspect means you can just go off and fuck whomever you want without talking to your partner. That just isn't how it works, the poly couples I know have a deep understanding of one another, they go over things before they do them and don't just fuck whomever they like without thinking on the consequences.
>>23009777
You can - if that's what your relationship contract allows. My partners do not get veto rights for example, except for primary partners. But only primary partners know who I am all seeing.
That being said I also respect my partners and am not going to partner with someone who could complicate the situation or cause drama. If its a potential source I check in with them.
Polyamory is about communication. Lots of communication. You're talking about a very unhealthy dynamic where someone is abusing the situation and communication skills aren't developed.
Poly isn't a "mature" choice - it's just a choice of model like any other. It just requires a hell of a lot of communication - but all relationships require communication.
>>23009777
>How do you find it a mature thing to Fuck who you want when you want regardless of anyone else feelings?
What a stupid thing to say.
What you're describing is an asshole. They exist in all kinds of relationships.
Successful polyamorous relationships are built on trust and mutual respect. That generally means discussing who you fuck, and when, with your partner(s). They don't like it? It doesn't happen. Some relationships allow non-veto, but again that's built of respecting each others wishes.
I'd like to be in a poly relationship with at least 2 women
But things like that are merely fantasies considering
How most women don't like to "share."
I've only had one 3 some experience in my life :(
>>23012434
That's .. That's why you date poly women.
>>23012493
Hmm. Thinking of whether to ask a poly girl I've been seeing if she'd be down. FWIW I think she's a good friend and I don't want to make her feel like she's just a sex toy.
Then there's the problem of finding someone who'd join us.
>>23008805
Tell me how I can live your life?
>>23005427
me and my girlfriend love doing it with other dudes. snapchat us jpscan996
>>23012548
I would recommend reading "Opening Up: A Guide To Nonmonogamy" because do you even know what relationship model you want?
Part of me is raising an eyebrow and wondering if you're just trying to make a glorified threesome.
>>23012669
So sick of that book. My ex thought it was such enlightening shit, but couldn't practice a word of it.
>glorified threesome
What's glorified about it? I'm not really in a love relationship with this woman, but there's mutual attraction, communication, and respect. She has a long term girlfriend (which I would not want to get in the middle of unless I was invited without prompting).
I know what my ideal relationship model is, but part of what attracts me to nonmonogamy is not having to keep up the charade that every physical relationship has to be permanent. This is fun right now, and when one of us gets bored, we can move on without hurt feelings.
>>23006100
you remind me of a woman that messaged me recently listing all the anime she watched and asking if i'd be down to live with her and her husband. i was totally down with everything but she never responded after that.
maybe she thought my taste in anime was shit ;-;
>>23009777
The point of being in a polyamorous relationship is that everyone is OK with it.
>>23012556
Haha. Um, communicate, love yourself, and take chances.
