EMBARASSING SECRET THREAD
Post your most embarassing bad habits or events. Pic is not necessary but welcomed.
Now spill your guts
Okayy here's mine.
I spread my ass cheeks while shitting cuz it comes out easier
Does anyone else do this? ? Or am I just really weird
.......
My 28th birthday is on Friday and I've never kissed a woman.
>>22889663
I'm lying next to my fiancee, mother of my kids, chatting to a chubby girl a decade younger than me on kik, attempting to get her to send me pictures of her cunt.
>>22889750
ur not the only one m8
>>22890047
Oh thank God
>>22889995
That's a bit fucked up
>>22889896
I'm sorry anon
I jerk off on omegle
>>22890531
Everyone does
>>22889663
I fantasize about and masturbate to having loving, deep, complex BDSM relationships with girls I know and grew up with.
>>22890633
You're not the only one
>>22889750
I do as well sometimes, although generally when I sit down on the toilet I like to spread my cheeks and sit plum down on the toilet so that rather than grabbing my cheeks and pulling apart, the toilet sides do that for me. It only works in petite toilets though. I've found European toilets work better than American for this as well.
>>22889995
You sound like a dick, unless she's in on it.
i have a yotsuba tattoo
I suck my poo back in when its going to fall out, then i push it until it almost falls out again, then i suck it up again, repeat for about an hour all while standing and browsing the internet.
Sometimes when I suck it back in it causes pee to squirt out though, the only downside.
>>22889663
I put my gf's dildo in my ass
Posted my small dick on /soc/
I'm either crushing really hard on or straight up in love with one of my very close friends, and I really doubt that she feels the same way and I'm afraid of fucking up the friendship we currently have which I very much enjoy and don't want to lose.
Help.
>>22894578
2/10
I cut my pubes with scissors on the dinning room.
>>22894578
You're gonna have to end that. Either the friendship or take time off and let those feelings subsided. Don't be one of those guys who awkwardly hangs around hoping something happens. It's gonna be worse when it comes out accidentally than if you face it head on, and that may mean being open about your emotions, or burning them away.
>>22889663
Oh yeah.
I have bipolar disorder and it makes me experience hypersexuality. I get soft from blow jobs and turned on by being slapped in the face hard. Intense things that girls will only do when really drunk then regret the next day and soon end the relationship when they learn my tastes are sex drive are too intense.
I cheated on my wife because of this (with several women) and ruined my life. Bipolar ruins my life every few months now and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna kill myself one day.
fucked a footlong sub
fucked some chocolate cake
stuck some stuff up my peenor
measured how far i could cum
One time when I was a horny teen my older brother got drunked and passed out and i sucked his dick in his sleep. sexy then, shameful minutes later and now
>>22894661
Are you sure it's your bipolar disorder and you're not just experiencing a form of sex addiction? It's a real thing you know.
>>22894661
i have bd as well, and it causes me to get in cars with random guys and jump the bones of randos
>>22894390
Who hasn't?
I eat my pussy juice every time I masturbate. I think about assholes a lot and I wish some day someone would let me give them a rimjob so I could die happy. Also I have started to like feet because my bf always makes me give him foot rubs. I used to hate feet but he rewards me with sex.
Found my girlfriend who I met on /soc has been posting nudes on here after telling me we shouldent go on soc anymore and said I can't masturbate anymore. We live a about an hr away so we can't always see eachother. I found out snd she said someone has stolen her identity and I can tell she is lieing. So I am poisoning her cat and sending those nudes to her family.
Idk if that's embarassing. But I have a bad habit of overdoing things.
>>22897329
Just leave the cat out of it man
>>22897338
That cat is her life. She ruins mine I ruin hers. Invested everything I had in our relationship.
>>22897329
>>22897349
killing an innocent animal is sick!
>>22895804
Bipolar 1 is known for hypersexuality especially during periods of hypomania and manic episodes. I'm addicted to the stimuli experienced during my manic episodes and equally during sex, so it's kinda like a sex addiction.
It's awful though, as I get extremely depressed when I'm rejected at all, and especially for sex. I'm used to getting it and having it, especially since I work nightlife.
>>22897349
But the cat didn't do shit. Punish the guilty not the innocent.
Posting my pic on /soc/
>>22889750
I do this when im having a hard time
I feel like this is one of those things that is more common than we think
When I first masturbated I used a massager that my parents had in their room, before they got home from work.
I now know this as Hitachi Magic Wand. Ew.
>>22897349
Then give the cat to a shelter or something, there's no sense murdering an animal
>>22897329
idc about the nudes, just leave the cat alone
>>22889896
Why????
im 6'2 my dick is the size of a tube of tooth paste and ive only had one gf that lasted for a couple of months and she was a virgin with daddy issues so I dumped her. She ended up fucking 5 of my friends as a ways of getting back at me
>>22895603
f or m?
>>22889663
I am human. My species embarrasses me.
>>22889896
Anon, my boyfriend is 28 and was a kiss-less virgin who had never had a girlfriend before.
I'm 19 and met him via the internet a few years ago, became friends and then fell in love. I moved from the US to Germany for him and have never been happier.
Don't give up hope, there is someone out there for you!
>be 23
>got tired of dating
>start fucking around with strangers
>actively seeking out one night stands
>12 months like this pass
>still not giving a fuck
>up the stakes and visit swingerclubs/gangbangs, etc
>meet this 50ish yo woman
>she's a 5/10, chubby and wornout
>kinda looks like a aquamoeba
>tells me im hot stuff
>she offers me money for my 'services'
>wants to pay me 70 euro (about 100 bucks) for each 'session'
>takes me to her place the same night
>pulls over the car on the way
>wants to suck my dick right now
>feels her sloppy throat, feel her dentures
>suddenly realize I became a prostitute overnight
>wtfamidoingwithmylife.jpeg as I cum down her throat
This 'relationship' lasted 4 months. Now we are seven years away and I never told this to anyone, /soc/.
>>22889663
I'm a diaper sub. I contemplate suicide but I'm too cowardly to go through with it so I've just come to terms with the fact that I'm going to live a long life alone.
I became gay back when I was so desperate for female contact that I did netflix n chill with a nearly blind girl who's cerebral palsy confined her to a wheelchair. Also she had diabetes. She had nice tits, but she was maybe a 2 or 3/10. 1/10 maybe. Look, she wasn't attractive, okay? This secret already makes her look bad, I don't want to make fun of her.What happened was we made out after I drank down like three 24 oz beers, and I fingered her while sucking on her tits. After the second time I got her off I made the mistake of smelling my fingers. That's when I turned gay. It's actually pretty cool being able to flirt with cute guys and do stuff with them. I'm not saying you should turn gay, but I am saying never settle out of desperation, or you won't recognize yourself when the dust has settled.
From the ages of 16-around 18 I would harvest tobacco out of cigarette butts from gutters/sidewalks and either smoke it myself or sell it at school
Also used to pinch weed off my mother from the ages of 13-16 until I got my own connection
>>22897329
i don't care about the cat, but i'd like to see the nudes
>>22900320
best post in thread so far
>>22889663
i'm mentally unstable
>>22889663
I cum so hard to the fantasy of my boyfriend bringing girls home and fucking them in front of me.
It's really hard for us to gave vaginal sex since I'm really small and tear everytime, and he's bigger than average.
I want him to brag about how much easier it is with other girls and how much they please him.
>>22892808
can we see it pls
>>22901268
A time-stamped pic of your spread pussy would be great, just so we can see what you mean...
I let my cat lick my armpits.
Posted this on /pol/ earlier
I have a half-black bastard boy currently 10 years old (99% sure its mine, I mean hes half fucking white with my facial features), and i'm extremely lucky that I gave the nigress a nickname and so she now can't find me because she's too stupid to. That and she's probably happy with the welfare loots, and i've since moved away from that town.
I absolutely adore my 6 year old blonde hair blue eye girl though. She's one of the smartest kids in her school by far.
(My wife doesn't have a single clue about the boy)
>>22902638
you're an absolute asshole dude
he's your flesh and blood
>>22902638
>>22902702
nothing wrong with this i wouldnt want a black child either.
although i would never have sex with a black woman so youre a retard.
>>22902600
..Um, no? This isn't a camwhore thread.
>>22889995
Post pics if you get them
>>22902638
>>22902716
Congratz, you're both dickheads.
I masturbate in the works toilets pretty much daily.
I like the risk and the fact my company are paying me to jerk it
>>22902638
Racists on here make fun of blacks for not raising their children and then you do the exact same thing. You are hypocritical scum.
