U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) sent shockwaves through the Republican Party today when he announced that he would endorse Donald Trump for President, but only if the GOP nominee would be willing to publicly support a ban on masturbation. The Senator called this ‘The single most important issue facing the country today’ and that without ‘swift action by the next President the country was doomed to slide down a slippery slope of debauchery and self-satisfaction’.
http://www.shoah.org.uk/2016/06/28/ted-cruz-i-will-endorse-donald-trump-for-president-if-he-makes-masturbation-illegal/
>>81423188
>It starts innocently enough with a JC Penney catalogue tucked under your mattress, but it quickly spirals out of control, and before you know it, your mother has to call the coroner because you’ve died from auto-erotic asphyxiation.
>banning masturbation in current year
pretty sure jacking off isn't as bad as cheating on your wife
http://www.snopes.com/ted-cruz-donald-trump-endorsement/
Too bad it's fake.
>>81423188
>>81423188
>>81423188
Some shitshow palestinian blog.
Not a reliable source you fucking wetback lover.
Sage
>>81423188
Probably the funniest jab at Trump I've seen anyone take
>>81423188
What should I fap to?
I'm masturbating right now just to spite him.
>>81423188
nice one
>>81424604
>>81424753
>>81424780
>literal autism
>>81425694
The definition of a cancer patient
>>81423188
the masturbation donald, ban the masturbation
>>81426226
kek
>>81426226
Ted Cruz is incapable of sending shockwaves anywhere. For that to happen, he'd have to be relevant.
>>81426226
lel
>>81426226
This makes me miss the primaries, now everything is too serious and the memes aren't even that good anymore.
>>81426684
I'm pretty sure he sends out shockwaves every time he sits down.
>>81426926
The world is getting more serious in general, anon
