Love and infatuation are degenerate emotions that will only lead to pain. Prove me wrong
no one will ever love me
>>74980704
usually true, sadly
>femanon from /soc/ here
>>74980781
But why would you want to find love? It's just a bunch of chemicals and it ALWAYS fades. You'd be better off just avoiding it altogether.
>>74980863
Nope, I just don't understand why people allow others to get close enough to hurt them
Attachment is the source of all pain ya dufus. If you accept deep down inside nothing is permanent, even love, you won't be subjected to any pain.
>>74981276
the stoics are here everyone, clear out
Its basically the poor mans drug
>>74981016
>But why would you want to find love?
I want a companion. It's not even just a sex thing, I'm lonely.
>>74981276
Yeah I know. I went like 5 years without even knowing what love felt like, but then I fell in love and now I'm trying to figure out how to go back to not having that emotion.
>>74981438
Yeah but that's what friends are for. Its possible to not be alone while still not allowing yourself to get attached.
>>74981586
You have to close the book and tell your gf where u fucked up and take all the plot holes out and then its over
>>74981677
I'm not trying to stop loving her, I'm trying to stop loving period
Infatuation isn't love, and most people call infatuation "love" in the modern age. The whole concept of eros vs agape
Real love can only come after decades of being married and going through hardships together.
This is why arranged marriage is a good thing.
>>74981586
thats' because dating is degenerate, you're supposed to GET MARRIED right away, realize love isn't the basis of marriage, but that it's a contract. Till death do you part, no matter how hard it gets. The love comes in raising a family, of course it's empty without the vows and without the kids.
>>74981586
>Yeah but that's what friends are for. Its possible to not be alone while still not allowing yourself to get attached.
I-I want to be attached. I want to love someone.
>>74980704
I just want someone to cuddle with
>>74981677
see the reason I was missing love in the first place was because I was prescribed a bunch of adderall as a child. Naturally, taking an amphetamine every day for 9 years straight stole some of my emotions from me. This girl brought back love and I just want it to go away again.
>>74981999
I'm aware that love and infatuation are different, thats why I listed them separately. But as with all things, they both end. It seems more worthwhile to just avoid them entirely
>>74982080
See that makes a lot of sense in a pre-industrial society. In those cases marriage is almost a necessity for survival, as you need children to help out with working. It makes sense that people base their marriages off of love in our current society because its not as demanding of manual labor. That being said, I do think its important that IF you get married(not sure why you would want to though) you make sure that it is with a person who won't make you want to rip your hair out.
>>74982233
I mean you can still get attached to and love your friends without being IN love with them. They are two very different concepts
>>74982233
That kind of "attachment" isn't complete without reproducing and lifetime marriage. That's why so many people are unhappy in relationships today: cohabitation and premarital sex. Then they make the mistake of assuming that all male-female relationships are shit, when really it's just because they're doing it wrong.
>>74982563
Industrial society is shit. Any "redpill" will ultimately bring you to this truth. Every "degeneracy" is the result of people not needing to work to survive and have limits to choices and social circles.
But plenty of people still do arranged marriage now, such as Indians and orthodox Jews, and it still works better than modern Western love-based marriage. Yes, the key is being with someone who you don't hate, but not obsessing over the "perfect soul mate"
>>74980704
The Buddha agrees with you.
>>74982587
I'm so out of my element talking about this, but what you are saying does make sense to me. Because you'd marry early and then grow together rather than try to blend later. I think that might be why marriage doesn't work as well now, we aren't married as young and it isn't as much of a contract.
But again, I've never even had a girlfriend at 30 so I'm out of my league talking about this.
>>74982822
I had one, a Bangladeshi immigrant (poo memes incoming). I know what I know because of her relatives being happy with their arranged marriages. Meanwhile her own parents had eloped out of love from their home country, and ended up in a horrible abusive marriage, and her dad eventually "found the light" of Islam after being apostate for most of his life.
>>74982770
I agree with you on that. I believe that most people place way too much importance on love and searching for their "soulmate". But in my mind the correct answer is to just not worry about love or marriage at all. I feel this way because relationships always add a bunch of expectations that weren't there before. with MOST people you would have to start thinking of them as well(granted that's not the case with all people, but those people are so rare that I would argue they are statistically negligible). Some would argue that this is a good thing, but I would argue that it's idiotic because then you are no longer you. You end up changing for the other person and that's stupid. You should never change for anybody but yourself. And yes I agree that post-industrial society is shit. But, unfortunately, that's the point society has reached. The only thing to do is move forward and see what we can fix in the future instead of longing for the past.
>>74982822
The move from country life to city life and the development of skilled labor is another huge reason as to why marriage doesn't work out as well now. It used to be that people got married and had kids because its the only way they would be able to produce enough food on the farm to survive. So it was less of an "I want to get married" type situation and more of a "I need to get married or I will die" type situation.
>>74984079
The problem with abandoning marriage entirely is reproduction. Despite love and relationships being shit for people (especially men) it's indisputable that you need both parents to raise a sane child.
>>74984909
See that true as well. Unfortunately, there's a growing trend among intelligent women of avoiding marriage and relationships for the sake of pursuing their passions and talents. I can't say I blame them, it's just problematic. I feel like the whole point of parenthood is to raise a being that is better than yourself. That way there will be a constant global rise in intelligence and an overall advancement of the species. Sadly the people that are reproducing the most don't share this opinion. It's made even worse by the fact that most people can't swallow their pride for long enough to entertain the idea that their child is better than them.
