Can someone explain Germany to me?
>WW1
>"Hey Hans?"
>"Yes Hans?"
>"This war isn't going so well."
>"I know"
>"I have a plan though. Want to hear it?"
>"Sure Hans, shoot."
>"Well, you know that dormant superpower, the United States?"
>"Yes. Very big. Very powerful."
>"I'm thinking we make allies of it's retarded southern neighbors and begin indiscriminately killing Americans."
>"Fantastic idea. But is that all?"
>"No, it gets better. You know that batshit ideology communism we've been sitting on?"
>"Yes. It really is batshit."
>"What if we propagate it, destabilize large chunks of Europe and collapse them?"
>"Fantastic idea. I can't possibly see how this could go wrong"
>WW2
>"Hey Hans?"
>"Yes Hans?"
>"Are you still mad about losing that war we started?"
>"I sure am."
>"I have a plan."
>"Go on, Hans. I love your plans."
>"Well, remember how last time we went to war simultaneously with both Western and Eastern Europe and it ended in a humiliating defeat?"
>"I sure do. It really was quite humiliating."
>"Well Hans, what if we do it again?"
>"Fantastic plan. I can't see how this could go wrong."
>Current Year
>"Hey Hans?"
>"Yes Merkel?"
>"You notice all these millions of poor people in the Middle East and Africa?"
>"I have noticed them, yes."
>"We should invite them to come here and live on generous welfare handouts."
>"Great idea!"
>"Hey Merkel?"
>"Yes Hans?"
>"There sure A LOT of them coming in..."
>"Give us a minute"...
>..."Hey Turkey, can you take back all these poor people?"
>"Sure can. You have my visas ready?"
>"I do."
>"Hey Hans?"
>"Yes Merkel?"
>"I've sorted the migrant problem out."
>"That's great. I can't possibly see how this could go wrong."
>>73744529
Germany also sent Lenin back to Russia and gave him money to overthrow the government. Germans are the worst sort of people, they destroyed Russia for a century with that.
>>73744529
Remember to write the next paragraph in Mubslime Scribbles.
>>73744629
>Germans are the worst sort of people
The only way this could be funnier is if it was posted by India
>>73745059
Do you have anything to dispute me?
>>73745142
probably the fact that a corrupt vodka soaked rapist of a nation is hating on germans as a people is ironic.
>>73744529
you can write a passage on the 30 years war as well anon.
>hey hans
>hey martin luther
>aren't these indulgences bullshit?
>i think so
>let's post our grievances on the wall and undermine the catholic church. nothingcouldgowrong.jpg
>a short while later
>damn hans you went way too far, i don't want any part of this crazy shit
>8 million europeans die over the next 30 years
>>73745816
Russia is a corrupt vodka drinking shithole because of the Germans. Bolshevism does this to a nation and the Germans are why the Bolsheviks took power.
>>73745816
We need a paragraph consortium of Germany's unwise decisions.
>>73745904
>russians weren't vodka soaked murderers before the germans got involved
>what is the oprichnik
>what is the okhrana
>do i even need to start on rasputin?
please ivan
>>73746218
>russians weren't vodka soaked murderers before the germans got involved
>what is the oprichnik
>what is the okhrana
Nothing different than what happened in France, Britain and your beloved Germany. Bolsheviks made the difference.
>>do i even need to start on rasputin?
He is overstated massively.
>>73746194
>paragraph consortium
nice diction
>>73746321
how is he overstated massively? the tsar was at the front and while the tsarina was in charge this drunken sex addled charlatan was actually making policy in the world's largest empire. i don't think this can be overstated.
actually the oprichnik was totally unprecedented for the time, we don't see this kind of secret policing and democide again until the 20th century (colonies notwithstanding). the russians were far ahead of their time in terms of being oppressive totalitarian shitbags.
>>73746912
Because he was not actually running things.
>actually the oprichnik was totally unprecedented for the time, we don't see this kind of secret policing and democide again until the 20th century
Casualties were nothing compared to what groups like the Turks, Mongols and Chinese did to their subjects.
>oppressive totalitarian shitbags.
You sound like a SJW.
>>73747142
>being against totalitarians like stalin and ivan is now SJW
holy fuck russia this is why there is sanctions against you.
>Casualties were nothing compared to what groups like the Turks, Mongols and Chinese did to their subjects.
that is Asia, we know you are savages. you said before that it was no different that France, England, and Germany, now you are comparing them to the mongols. stop moving the goalposts ivan you cheat at the olympics and suck at hockey.
>>73747573
Totalitarians is a meaningless buzzword thrown around my liberals. You are not discussing anything of substance.
>you said before that it was no different that France, England, and Germany
It wasn't. During the medieval era for instance Germany exterminated the Prussians in a total sense of the word. The wars of religion killed 30% of the population of Germany.
>>73744529
>>"Go on, Hans. I love your plans."
dunno why i laughed so hard Tbh
>>73747731
i know i'm just shitposting, but i'm not off base, totalitarianism isn't a buzzword, it is literally how russia managed to subjugate and maintain the most diverse and geographically extensive empire in the world. it is hilarious that you would say totalitarianism is a buzzword when it killed literally 50 million russians in the last century alone. you either have a short memory or have been fully brainwashed by putin's rhetoric.
t. not even a liberal.
Someone animate this
>>73748165
Stalin himself killed millions of russians with his big hands.
>>73744629
>the Krauts sent us Lenin and he single-handedly turned us into communists
>We dindu nuffin!
classic rushka bydlo education
People really underestimated the US prior to WW2
In WW2 Japan thought taking out Hawaii would be a cakewalk, and the US wouldn't bother retaliating in any meaningful way after they won.
In WW1 Germany legit thought Mexico could BTFO of the US with a revolution. That just goes to show how little they knew about the region though. In any western country getting a country's neighbor to attack it with the promise of territory might work.
The problems for Germany was that Mexico is full of Mexicans. They can't fight, they aren't smart, they aren't well organized, they're generally apathetic to everything around them and are overall very lazy.
They couldn't even manage to beat a bunch of disorganized Texas rebels in the 1830s, yet the Germans thought they could beat the US (which had already beaten Mexico without much of a fight decades prior) in the 1910s?
Germany must have either been desperate or they just had no reliable information
>>73749129
5/7 of the Bolshevik top leaders were jewish
