Cycling horror stories?
Every time I end up taking a shit on the side of the road. Agonizing cramps leading up to it, then spend rest of the ride worrying it might happen again.
Can't say I've ever had any horrors - just the occasional shameful/painful moment that involved bleeding profusely or calling a family member to ask for a ride after bonking a long ways from home.
>>925785
Why is there a bike path sign on the grass?
>>925797
it's RIGHT NEXT TO THE FUCKING PAVEMENT you mong
>>925801
looks to me like its right next to the bikepath
>>925795
Do you take toilet paper?
>>925796
>bonking a long ways from home.
I'm a new cyclist and I'm worried about that. Don't really know how much food to bring coz it adds extra weight. So I've only been going for 2 hour rides maximum with some fruit and even then I'm hungry again when I get back. Eat a lot before I go too.
>>925803
>Do you take toilet paper?
I take paper towel, its easier to manipulate with gloves on.
>>925801
It's right next to the sidewalk, that's why I'm asking.
>>925795
>not shitting before you ride
Are you some kind of meme from the subcontinent?
>>925785
>dashed white line
>not driving around him when traffic permits
stupid cagers deserve to be mad
>group ride
>leader of the group indicating left turn
>everyone leans left
>guy in front of me leans
>I start leaning
>he fucking brakes and cancel his lean, now moving straight
>time slowed down by 5x
>I see my wheel overlapping and makes contact
>go down in slow motion
Bled like a bitch because of chipseal surface. I never rode directly behind him anymore.
>>925796
huehue yeah i've done that
>>925795
>taking a shit on the side of the road
What sort of fucking mongoloid throwback actually does this rather than hold it until you can find a proper toilet or at least a portable outhouse? Or do you have some sort of fucked-up medical condition?
>absolutely disgusting
>>925796
>>925803
>>925850
>2016
>bonking, EVER
..OK, happened to me exactly once, about 15 years ago. Went out after work on my old 30-pound, $350 steel mountain bike, didn't bother having a snack first. Got about 15 miles out, and it was like someone had flipped the switch marked 'endurance' to the 'OFF' position. Never actually stopped, but suddenly could barely hold 10mph. Limped along to a convenience store and ate about 1000kcal of various things. 20 minutes later I was better. Never let that happen again -- but these days riding up to 2 hours (up to 40 miles) with nothing but plain water, I'm just fine.
>conditioning
>>925857
you're so cool =P
>>925785
>Driving to work
>2 faggots in Lycra riding tandem taking up a whole car lane
>rightmost one is drifting into right lane as well (Aus..)
>a full 50km/h below the limit
>bike Lane right next to them is empty
It's like you cyclists want people to hate you. Why do you do it?
>>925920
Cycle lanes are often poorly maintained and have potholes. Why should they have to suffer so you can get somewhere faster?
>>925920
Because watching your impotent rage inside your little steel cage is hilarious.
>>925925
Pretty much this, also
>riding to work
>path always involves crossing a 4 way stop sign intersection with an access road leading to a freeway on-ramp
>every day the drivers road rage and honk and yell as I cross proceed through the stop sign even though I stop and wait my turn and proceed as a cage would if cagers ever followed the law, the cagers literally believe they're entitled to go 10 at a time through a stop sign instead of alternating with the vehicle on the cross road
>one day decide I'll try getting off my bike and walking across the intersection slowly
>it works, the cagers are courteous and don't honk, even though they're waiting for 20 seconds for me to walk my bike instead of the 5 it would take for me to pedal through
They finally fixed up the MUP to bypass that area so I don't have to deal with it anymore but cagers are like animals, they are ruled by their emotions
Because these fags pay no road tax to ride on the road.
Everything else that goes on the road has to be registerded and a portion of the tax goes to maintaining the road.
If someone drives a bulldozer or crane or anything on the road it is registered. . Unless these cunts do the same its unfair.
If you have another car driving almost in the middle of the road at 30kph under the speed limit i guarantee you will be pissed and beep to get them to move out of the way same applies t cyclists.
>>925929
Wow, just, wow. You're the kind of entitled prick who disrupts events like Critical Mass and ends up in jail for 20 years.
>>925932
Nah, he's the kind of entitled prick who thinks of doing something like that but ends up just venting on a chinese cartoon imageboard.
>>925929
>road tax
>normal weight person + 15kg of bike does the same damage to the pavement as a car or truck.
Sure champ, sure.
Next time you'll be asking walking people to pay road tax because they cross the fucking street.
I'm guessing you live in the US, amirite?
>>925933
I hope so. I'm just worried there will be a day when he flips out and turns his cage on someone who's intelligent enough to cycle.
>>925938
wow, wrong quote right there
>>925939
>someone who's intelligent enough to cycle.
Like all the people cycling because they have suspended licenses due to DUIs, the people too poor to afford even a shitbox, the people too stupid or nervous to get a driver's license, the homeless people getting around via a stolen bicycle, the children too young to drive, etc.
>>925943
Yeah, you do live in the US.
>captcha are car images
Nothing was said about the road tax and fuel... it is part of registration.
If cyclists want to use the road then their bikes should be registered. Just like a motorcycle.
Its clear a lot of you in this board like your pants tight, but geez. Fair is fair. You dont need to ride side by side or take up a whole lane, its quite dangerous
>>925943
>I live in florida
>>925945
Which is the same thing i said.
Road maintenance and expansion spendings come from govt. budget, not from just one tax, but the sum of them all.
You buy something on the market, taxes go to road maintenance.
You import something, taxes go to road maintenance.
You register a car, taxes go to road maintenance.
You pay house taxes, or the normal services like water, energy and so on, taxes go to road maintenance.
The same way those taxes go for everything else govt. does. That's how taxes work.
>captha: buses
>>925943
It's hilariously ironic how insecure seeing someone demonstrating some personal, social and global awareness can make some people. It's not like cycling is difficult or expensive to do but they still act gloriously butthurt because of how strongly it illuminates their own personal failings.
By the way, I'm pretty sure you ask people "you think you're better than me?" a lot. The answer is that if you have to ask this question, they are better than you, often a lot better.
>>925945
>You dont need to ride side by side or take up a whole lane, its quite dangerous
How is slowing cages dangerous? If anything, it makes things safer (you're welcome, by the way). What's dangerous is if I don't assume a dominant lane position and people try to pass me without moving fully into the other lane. By riding just left of the center I force them to only pass when there's some assurance of my personal safety.
This is how truly murderously dangerous cagers are, they think their time is more important than my life.
This is why its fucking dangerous
http://i.4cdn.org/n/1448035624273.webm
Stay off the fucking road, or at least ride on the very side part
>>925949
>By the way, I'm pretty sure you ask people "you think you're better than me?" a lot.
I'm not the one who has the luxury of cycling for leisure and thinks he's superior to 90% of adult Americans who drive everywhere. I also don't go out of my way to make life more difficult for people just trying to live their lives, which is something you apparently take pride in. Cyclists are the most selfish, egotistical, narcissistic people on the road. And then they have the gall to project that onto everyone else.
>>925952
He didn't shoulder check. That could have been even more disastrous if he were in a cage. It's a total red herring and you know it (or perhaps you don't, you could be a frothy cager who's more interested in his small minded opinions than facts).
>>925953
>live their lives
>get their cage to their pointless destination a few seconds faster
>more important than my safety (you know, actually being able to go on living my life)
>cycling for leisure
I cycle to work and for leisure. Sorry that this makes you feel so incredibly inferior. Maybe if you did this the improvements to your body would rub off and improve your mind so you can get a decent job too.
>>925953
Not him, but, I cycle for leisure and transport, I'm >>925928
I haven't owned a cage since the late 90s when I realized it was unnecessary and provoked an unhealthy, ugly lifestyle. The way I get to work is on a bike. And yes, the fact that your kind gets more angry when I go through an intersection efficiently and lawfully, and less angry when I actually get off my bike and create an obstruction to traffic, means you actually prefer that I make your life more difficult as long as it slows me down too. This is a form of revenge, I guess, for the rage that you feel when you see someone who isn't trapped in a glass box, raging impotently against the gridlock traffic.
![1456071101573[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/36YPtZw.jpg "1456071101573[1].jpg")
>>925955
>implying you work for a living
>>925953
>luxury of cycling
>Everybody is an American
>in CRC a normal city bike costs about 400 USD, cars go minimum ten times the cost of a normal bike.
Sure champ, it is a luxury.
As for "going out of "our" way to make life difficult to others", wat. Seriously wat.
So
>bikes are for the poor
>bikes are a luxury
There's a bit of contradiction in there, isn't it?
Many people ride a bike to work, and possibly all of them also for leisure, is there something wrong with that?
Most cities now have cycle lanes. The ones that don't, have explicit rules for cyclists. Maybe your rage should go to the ones that make those rules instead of normal people?
Also, why don't you go and make pedestrians "pay for road tax"?
>>925957
Nice job, man.
>unnecessary and provoked an unhealthy, ugly lifestyle
They're like ham planets calling people anorexic for trying to lose weight. Total crabs in a bucket syndrome.
>>925958
Not only do I work for a living but, judging from you having no leisure time, I probably earn a lot more than you. I'm not going to lie, it's not rockstar money but I'll own my home in under 10 years and can afford to indulge my hobbies. To add to your butthurt, I'll probably live longer than you too, assuming a cager like you doesn't run me off the road (I trust my family to ensure whomever is responsible ends up dying in jail).
>>925795
See a doctor m8
I do own a car, about 75% of the time I ride to work (a little over 10 miles one way) and I enjoy going on long weekend rides. I do not understand some motorists unwarranted hatred for cyclists. But at the same I think calling everyone in a car a cager is a stupid insult. There are plenty of good motorists out there
>>925921
Might be true in burgerland but cycle lanes are always better here in the UK.
>>925961
Start calling everyone you know at work a cager and see how long you have that job still.
>>925965
Maybe he'd had a bad day. Nothing makes me happier than making cagers boil over with impotent, insecure rage.
>>925968
>Nothing makes me happier than making cagers boil over with impotent, insecure rage.
The most pathetic statement ITT thus far. Seek help, that shit isn't healthy.
>>925968
Do you even cycle or do you just shitpost?
>>925967
The directors hate cagers and makes them pay hundreds of dollars a year to use the parking lot (people with disabilities excluded). The money from this is used to subsidize cycling and other athletic clothing and equipment.
>>925972
I like your company
I work for a company where about 1/4 of the employees even own a cage. We had this one chick who would drive to work every day for 2 hours, eventually she came to her senses and started taking the boat which shaved her commute to like a half hour. But she comes from one of those places where a cage is how people show status, and she couldn't let go of that.
>>925975
I wish all companies were like this.
>But she comes from one of those places where a cage is how people show status
I dream of a world where owning a cage is regarded in the same way as smoking,
>>925975
>But she comes from one of those places where a cage is how people show status,
As opposed to riding around on a $5000 bicycle worth more than most shitboxes on the road. Yeah, cyclists aren't concerned with status at all. Get over yourself, you are as materialist if not more so than the average "cager."
>>925979
Seriously, you should see a fucking therapist about your inferiority complex, it's probably one of the reasons you work a shitty job.
>>925979
Uh, my bike was about $1600 not including the rack and lights and panniers which added another $400 or so
I really don't see how you can compare this to a person who intentionally adds 3 hours a day to her commute just so that her coworkers can understand she drives a $45,000 Lexus
>>925929
>Abusing SI prefixes and unit symbols
Please re-read the SI Brochure.
>>925982
>driving a car is slower than riding a bike
OK buddy.
>>925993
It can be, I'll easily beat a car crossing SF.
>>925997
Sure, buddy. Whatever you say.
>>925993
It's much slower, and that doesn't even get into the time it takes to park and retrieve your car from the parking attendant. Don't be a retard.
>>926001
>its much slower
Did you expect anyone here to take you seriously with this statement?
>>926002
What would it mean for someone to "take me seriously" on an estonian ice fishing forum?
There's nothing to discuss here, you're evaluating the merits of a cage as it relates to your rural existence, and the other guy and I are describing why a cage is pointless and inefficient in places where most people live: urban places.
>>926004
>rural existence
Do you make any statements that arent incorrect/untrue? I live in the city of los angeles. You've probably heard of it. Maybe you didnt know, but it's pretty "urban."
Now I suppose that you'll accuse me of being poor or low income (because bikes are more than cars?).
>>926007
Poor people stay poor because they make stupid financial decisions.
>>926007
>LA
>literally the textbook example of how to fuck up the design of a city so that it's impossible to get around except by helicopter
You're pretty good at this, 10/10.
>>926009
That's one reason. Another reason is laziness. Another reason is bad luck. There's lots of reasons. You have a simple mind.
>>926010
>impossible to get around by helicopter
Are you incapable of communicating without using absurd exaggerations? Get back to me when you talk talk with hyperbole, kid.
>>925929
Not true. I can't recall the details and don't care enough to look for links at the moment. The taxes every citizen pays elsewhere also go to fund road maintenance. Also, If most other cyclists are like me and own a car and a bike then it looks like we pay the road tax you're bitch ing about anyways.
>>926012
>implying exaggeration
The thing that's absurd is a "city" that doesn't have any tall buildings that lack helipads.
It's the kind of thing you might expect in a third-world metropolis with garbage infrastructure, like Lagos or Jakarta.
Get back to me when you understand how things work in cities where transportation isn't the butt of jokes.
>>925785
>no tapping the FredFaggot's $900 rear wheel and tacoing it
>then just leaving.
I guarantee not a single fucking car would do anything to help him, and "MUH GO PRO VIDEO" wouldn't catch license plates if you were quick enough.
>>926021
Cagers never fail to reveal that they are psychotically entitled man children.
>>925979
Dafuq? My bike was only $449. Not everybody wants to own an expensive bike.
>>926019
>city is so wealthy it has helicopter pads everywhere
>hurr the only way to get around is helicopter
Great logic, bud.
>>926028
>$6,684 per square foot
>$25m average price per unit
>no helipad
Oops looks like your argument was just invalidated.
This has less to do with money and more to do with the fact that your city is a case study in how not to do transportation
>>926030
>This has less to do with money and more to do with the fact that your city is a case study in how not to do transportation
Am I supposed to feel slighted or insulted by this? Like I'm getting get mad because your city has a better rail system than mine? I honestly dont give a fuck. I'm an LA native, and I can count on one hand the amount of times I've used public trans. I've owned bikes, but I've never used one to commute to work as I've always had real man jobs that require a vehicle.
Youre running you mouth about me living in a rural area and not knowing what an urban city is like and I proved you otherwise. You got BTFO and mad so you resorted to "b-b-but helicopter pads." Youre a pathetic bitch.
I really dont understand bikers who ride in middle of road, goddamn its just suicide.
>>926032
>I've always had real man jobs that require a vehicle.
Like what, ditch digging?
>not knowing what an urban city is like
But you don't know what an urban city is like. Los Angeles is what you get when you take about fifty different suburbs and jam them into a valley. The wealthy build helicopter pads while people like you pour your heart and soul into your cage because you cannot even survive unless you spend 90% of your waking hours inside it.
>>926033
Pretty much.
One trucker checking his texts instead of the road, and the biker is reduced to a thin greasy patch intermingled with neon fabric bits.
You can have all the legal rights to be in the lane, that means nothing when the much larger and faster vehicle is giving you a lesson in physics.
>>926037
So basically, like this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdHR1BI5fCs
>>926039
That's not a logical conclusion in any way, shape or form.
(Unless you just want a world of gruesome bike/train accidents. )
>>926034
>90% of your waking hours inside it.
Once again, the feebleminded pathetic bitch is incapable of communicating without hyperbole.
You have a trash life, huh? Not a lot of friends? Kissless virgin? Made less than $30k last year?
>>926042
Seems legit to me. Why would there be bike/train accidents when we've already agreed the problem is cagers who can't look away from their phones, ever?
>>926043
Nope, seems like you're projecting now. But I still want to know what "a man's job" is. Gender as a career qualification means low-tier, low-status, low-paid job (unless you're in some really niche occupation like a high-end hooker, in which case you're low-tier but you have a high hourly wage)
So, what's your sob story, anon? Let it all out, we're here for you.
>>926047
And you've never seen a person on a bike looking at a phone, or similarly distracted?
Okay then.
It's not a "cager" problem, much as you seem to want to make it one.
>>926050
Just because it happens doesn't mean it's equivalent, as your comments about "physics" so eloquently argued. Don't back down now that I've agreed with you, anon!
>>926051
Inattentive driving, (or riding) is the point you missed.
" Getting Deaded" is always equivalent and wholly unbiased.
The how and why of getting there is irrelevant to the dead, and an irritation to the living.
>>926047
>But I still want to know what "a man's job" is.
Skilled trades. The kind of work a bikeriding pussy like you wouldnt hack. I bet I earn more per hour than you. Wanna compare paystubs, little bitch?
>>926058
No, I got your point. Inattentive driving is catastrophic when there is a vast disparity in momentum between two vehicles on the same roadway. Logically, then, we should get rid of the disparity by eliminating cagers and converting them into environmentally sound coral reefs, as is customary for obsolete transportation equipment. I'm with you there. Let's get this started.
>>926059
Why don't we just compare cable bills. You can compare hourly wages at whatever dingy bars you patronize on pay day.
>>926066
Because cable is for poorfags. I have directv.
>>926063
Bikes make far better fish habitat, requiring far less preparation before dumping, and providing far more surface area per mass than an automobile or bus.
Scrapping the concept of bicycles as a viable form of daily transportation would would provide an incentive to use and expand public transit systems, resulting in improvements to infrastructures shared by a broader spectrum of transportation systems.
Additionally the number of bike/vehicle injuries and the associated costs to the public would be eliminated.
Also, it would put an end to one of the most obsolescent forms of "modern" transportation, placing bicycling into a niche hobby shared with horse-drawn buggies and steam lorries.
TL-DR?
"You First".
>>926069
What the fuck just get fast internet.
>>926098
I have fast internet
![85829184[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/PpFMkKY.jpg "85829184[1].jpg")
>bikefags are so poor the concept of having premium tv AND high speed internet is unfathomable
>>926098
Please be respectful. Among the less educated, having a television subscription with many channels, much like having a cage, or a large late-model television, is a sign you've "finally made it". I'm sure you didn't mean it, but by devaluing his achievement you accidentally attacked his masculinity.
>>926099
Is that was passes for fast in burgerland?
>>926100
Anon please. My internet isn't even classified as "fast", but it's better than that.
>>926106
Is that wired or over wifi, cause mine is over wifi. I'm sure if I got off my ass to connect an ethernet cable it would be way better.
Point is, I have high speed cable internet AND directv. It's called having money.
>>926109
And a cage! Don't forget to brag about the cage.
>>926109
>expects us to believe upload is <6mbps because wifi
Uhm ... no
>>926032
People like you make LA a shithole. Please leave.
>>926116
Maybe there was a routing issue with the packets. They were hoping to find a helipad but they had to drive with the plebs :)
>>926109
>wifi
No. Just no.
Wifi is symetrical. Your upload is only 5mb, while you can clearly pull 50mb down. That 5mb limit can not possibly be due to wifi.
That means you either have the most asymetrical plan ever, or you have the common but still highly asymetrical 10/1 up/down ratio, and 50/5 is dead on.
>calling 50/5 fast
>2016
Do you guys know what yik yak is? This is the top post of all time in my area.
>>926118
Yeah like I said, I'm not a little computer nerd bitch that cares about stuff like that. Sorry. I get that it really triggers your autism, but I dont care.
>>926121
>knowing stuff is bad
>having an occupation that involves using your mind is not masculine
>having a cage and a multi-TV subscription is a sign of prosperity
My instinct is to assume it must be awkward for you, but then I remember our value systems are so different that you may be getting a form of satisfaction out of parading your flaws before the public.
>>926122
Still too embarrassed of your meager wage to post a paystub? It's ok, I understand. If I rode a bike to a mcjob I wouldnt want anyone to see I earned $9 an hour either.
>>926121
>proud ignorance
white trash jock detected
![toronto-cycling-protest-die-in[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/RsXnPFp.jpg "toronto-cycling-protest-die-in[1].jpg")
>>926119
Yeah, maybe they'll hold another ineffectual "die-in" like the SJCs they are. Social Justice Cyclists.
>>926123
I'm more than financially secure. You're working class. What else is there to discuss?
>>926131
I bet I'm more financially secure. Does your employer offer a pension in addition to a 401k? I doubt it.
Stay inferior, little bitch. I've had enough of you. If you wanna find me on /n/ I'll be in the maritime thread with the other swinging dicks.
>>925929
>Everything has to be registarded
,, BEEP! BEEP!
>>926138
dosnt,, pay roadtax.
,,,, dosnt pay,,,, GASTAX!
>>926137
That's very impressive, but you forgot to mention how you've acquired your very own big screen TV, Bluto.
>>925843
>somehow his fault
also,,, yous all porr.,
,, imakin close to 5 figures,,, sorta close.
,my investment? ,, Waveing, to Everyone,,, ALL the Time,, GOLD!
,,, cars respect, and guard me.
pic>Bling!
>>926150
>sorta close
OK!,, ok, itsnothat close.
,,, but other income>PIC!, fresh produce.
,itsall in knowing ancient foraging.
>>926150
BACON LISTEN
become a biking mad scientist
take over the world bacon
BTW, fatter tyre + electric motor assist (motor charged by biking) = one wheel stability.
Monowheel, son
>>925954
The ruck actually assumed they were going to turn off at the offramp and didn't give them space, also the truck driver cut into the lane before it had opened up into a full width lane.
The cyclists literally did nothing illegal, shoulder check or not.
>>925964
Motorcyclists also use the term cager. It's a fine insult.
>>926296
Do motorcyclists share an affinity with cyclists? Or do they just look on them as slowpokes.
>>926298
Some feel like they are superior humans because riding a motorcycle is so hardcore or whatever. For some it's just one more method of transportation.
I never really understood the whole car VS motorcycle VS bicycle VS pedestrian arguing and moaning. How can one be so narrow minded, is your vehicle a religion?
ps. I have a car, a motorcycle and a few bicycles. They all have their place and time.
>>925843
>Bled like a bitch
Shouldn't have been riding in that time of the month.
>>925961
>I'll probably live longer than you too
Not if you'll get run over, you lycra-clad fag.
>>926298
Motorcyclists are at risk of being run over by texting cagers as well; so yes, it's a shared hatred.
>cycle to work
>fucking sweaty
>women in office complain about my BO
>have to buy membership+locker at gym 4 blocks away just so I can use the shower there
>>926298
I have no problems with cyclists because they generally don't pose a hindrance to me. I've had a cyclist try to punch me for splitting the lane with him, that went well because my motorcycle was probably getting on for 30 times heavier than his bike and he ended up riding into a bollard.
>>926426
>Not just swapping shirts and dabbing under the pits
cumon step it up
>>926426
>breaking a sweat on a commute
stop being fat imo
>>925951
I'm conflicted on that point, if you're in a two-lane road that's mostly unoccupied then does it matter if you ride right of center or left of center? In my experience they'll pass you anyway, only difference is they'll honk more if you're harder to pass. Besides, it seems the rule of the road to go to the right if you're too slow to match road speeds.
>>926430
>motorcycle in the bike lane
Why do I see this so often.
>>925965
>1mph
That's actually pretty impressive, I always end up having to dismount when I get stuck behind peds on campus because I can't ride that slowly. And they're moving like twice that fast.
>>925979
Are bikes for poor people or for rich people? Make up your fucking mind
>>926426
>eating so poorly that sweat from a commute makes you smell bad
just rub some essential oils on your body when you get there baka
>>926465
It's surprisingly fun seeing how slow you can ride without falling off
>>926468
I can be soaked in sweat after a bike ride yet I don't smell like BO.
Does that mean I stink and I'm used to the smell, or do I just not smell?
I don't understand.
>>926458
>motorcycle in the bike lane
It was a bus lane which permitted both motorcycles and bicycles, as well as taxis.
>>926480
UK m8?
>>926481
Yes.
Dudes, this guy crashes into like 10 people.
https://youtu.be/t0iAQnCQp9o
>>926511
Fuck off anthony
>>926451
Stop being slow filthy casual, holy shit if you're not breaking a sweat you're not riding hard enough
>>926473
I find when I ride fasted my sweat smells terrible. A dose of carbs before the ride fixes that. A dose of BCAA does not. But just waking up and riding isn't enough for bad smelling sweat, I have to be in a state of ketosis which takes at least a couple of days
I shower before work either way because I'm not going to go all day at my desk in lycra
>>926532
I always have something like porridge before my bike rides, maybe that's why.
>>925993
One of my coworkers lives 1 mile due north of me. We are both 8 miles (equidistant) to work door-to-door. He's impressed that it takes me just 20-25 minutes to get from my place to work across town in the morning on my bicycle while he sits in traffic in his truck for 35 minutes and then needs to look for a parking spot when he gets there.
So enjoy your gridlock, buddy. I'll be sure to wave as I filter on through ahead of you in your shitbox status-symbol. So much more efficient in every scenario, right?
>>926572
>So much more efficient in every scenario, right?
right up until you need to carry more than just a small backpack or you encounter a foot of snow, or need to go some actual distance... but then again I carry somewhere around 300lbs of tools and the jobsite can be up to 60 miles away. Good for you to be biking to work though.
>>926577
I have racks. Commute to an office, not any job sites (there's company vehicles for field/out of office work) and don't ever need to take anything more than a couple folders/change of clothes back and forth.
One of my higher ups in the office bikes a lot too. He's been there for 15+ years and probably makes 200k+. The car he occasionally commutes in is a Volvo. I don't have much personal office interaction with him but we nod to one another when we see eachother on bikes. It's nice to see somebody in such a well respected position also share some of my core values.
ive,,,, had,, a,"Vision!,,,
, its the Futre i SEE!>
,,, Drive thru Doctors,,, for fattys.
, id have a chance at "Healthscare., they dont like trike in office.,
,, then i look at edocrine shocked neighbors, on boxs of Chems? 400$?,,,,, choices.
,ya,, naaa., ill justake food.
>>926577
Most people aren't carrying much more than themselves when they're commuting. It's incredibly wasteful to use an entire car for such a purpose.
>>926584
>>926603
b-but everyone sits in a cage for 2 hours each way to get to and from a "jobsite" (whatever the fuck that is)!
if you don't use the brute strength of your arms to ensure a big "pay day" so you can "shop talk" at the bar on friday with your fellow union goons, you're not even a man
t. a neanderthal that dropped out of the fifth grade
>>926632
>all this angry projecting
>>925785
Why did you shitpost with this on r9k?
>Cyclists
>Make life hell for all road users and pedestrians
>Break the laws freely
>Clog up the roads riding three, four abreasts and maneuver dangerously
>Will gladly run down pedestrians at traffic lights and ignore the law in their 'critical mass' demonstrations.
>Will ride around, focused on their 'fitness' and not on the lorry that's behind them.
>No consideration for anyone else on the road; will gladly go at 2 miles per hour up a 40 mph hill with half a mile of traffic behind them unable to get past.
>>926532
>commute
>riding hard enough
Only on the way back, nigga.
>>926032
> sitting & using one feet to go to work
> real man jobs
fucking faggot
>>926059
>earns more per hour that everyone in the world
omg you must be so damn fucking awesome/perfect/diamond/1972dolphins
>>926069
>no life faggot
>proud to be so
>>926109
OMG go kill yourself
In my country only single mums who stay home own cable. Why would you pay a premium to watch advertisements?
Every show I want to watch I can stream live. lol.
>>926457
>only difference is they'll honk more if you're harder to pass
Or they'll attempt to overtake you within the same lane while another vehicle is overtaking them in the overtaking lane, thus endangering your life.
>>926465
Where do you encounter such slow pedestrians? Why on earth are the moving so slowly?
>>926532
Not riding hard enough for what? To satisfy autists on a Polynesian soap-carving periodical? I'm sure he gets where he needs to go.
>>926781
Speed is distance over time, casual. To cover a distance in a shorter time, you go faster. This translates to more exertion.
If for some reason you think that commuting automatically requires you to take as long as humanly possible otherwise you might get fat, then you have a really confused concept of either what speed is, or what commuting is, probably both.
>>925803
>eat a lot before I go too.
S M H
just eat further in advance of when you're going to ride, say, about an hour. bring only enough calories to replace the ones you'll lose on the ride; solid foods are ok. gels are better for hard efforts. make sure that those calories going back in during a ride are mostly short-chain carbohydrates.
cf the CONI manual
>pic repated
>>926800
>All these non sequiturs
Where do you add in the convenience of not requiring a shower in that formula?
>>926812
Because a shower is always required. If you're 3 blocks from work with no climbs and it's always between 65 and 75 and sunny, then maybe not. But then, that's not commuting, that's just "bring your bike to the office day"
>>926532
>riding hard on a 5 mile mostly flat commute
>>926812
But it's so much nicer to start working after a refreshing shower. Besides I save time by riding fast and showering compared to riding slow enough not to break sweat.
>>926834
>I take my bike to work sometimes as a conversation piece
>>926848
This t.b.q.h.
My routine:
>wake up, coffee, breakfast
>ride to work, park bike by the server room
>walk to gym, take 2 towels because my carbon footprint is lower than a vile cager
>take a luxurious shower with effete urban gentleman's bath gel, shampoo, and conditioner
>put on clean clothes, apply hair product, eau de cologne, wrap fine Italian scarf around my fragrant neck, walk outside
>stop for coffee and a croissant before going back upstairs
>start work feeling grrrr9
Feels good familia
>>926849
>riding to work at 18-20mph
>nosweat.jpg
>3 miles to go
>fred coworker goes by me, huffing and puffing
>he tells me I should be putting in more effort
>whatever bro dgaf
>get to work 5 minutes after he does
>he's standing outside the shower sweating buckets and trying not to puke on himself
>shower's busted bro
>he gets written up for violating a company rule on excessive fragrance
>mfw he doesn't even have a single KOM
>>926849
Wow u r a fag
>>926826
>Unless there's an elevation change on your route to work, you're not commuting
That's a novel definition of the word, to say the least.
>it's always between 65 and 75
??? State your units please.
>>926848
I feel the same way, but not every workplace has a shower.
>>926866
>Mixing unit systems
>Abusing SI prefixes and unit symbols
Please re-read the SI Brochure.
>>926888
don't tell me you think KOM involves kilometers and shit smdh tbqh lfamo hbao
>>926866
is 18-20mph typical on a bike? Honest question.
>>926897
No, attaining 20 is pretty difficult but everyone on /n/ or 4chin is somehow able to break that barrier.
>>926900
>he can't maintain 40mph on the flats for at least 15 minutes
Get a load of this weakling. I bet you've never even broken a crank
>>926897
There is no "typical bike speed", it's a horrible way to judge cycling, way too many factors.
If you must have an answer, no, most people average lower. Anybody can get to those speeds, a good number can average them if they want to.
>>926900
Anyone without a physical handicap can reach 20mph/30kmph on a decent roadbike. With marginal training even maintain it over the 5km discussed.
On a mountainbike or similar it will be very, very hard. I guess my point is that gear plays a huge role in this.
>>926897
2/3 of that is said to be typical. Dutch road standards say bike infrastructure should never be built for speeds less than about 8mph, because many cyclists start shifting attention to actually staying upright below that. 10-15mph is typical. Up to 20 is a fast cyclist on a good day on a fast bike. Anything over that is showing off and will not be maintained over distance.
>>926781
Faggot assholes at the university who don't understand how to fucking walk. It's actually more frustrating when I'm walking because most people will move out of the way of a bike when they hear CLICKCLICKCLICK right behind them but not for someone who wants to walk faster.
>>926897
It's hard to say what's "typical" without taking into account general fitness level, usual time spent cycling, style of bike and riding, weather/terrain conditions etc etc etc.
Most people on /n/ who care about cycling are enthusiasts and not the people who identify as cyclists because they piddle around a park for half an hour four times a year.
>>926897
well it's typical for me on my commute to work because it's mostly downhill
not typical at all for my commute home of course
>>926849
I enjoyed reading this. Your work has a gym? Or there's a gym nearby.
>>926919
Just make a clicking noise behind them to trick them into thinking you're on a bike.
>>926919
Carry a bike bell with you.
>>926022
Says the person who fully supports holding up traffic simply because they can
>>926100
>fast
I have some bad news anon..
>>926897
Even the frailest cyclist will be able to travel orders of magnitude faster than that. In fact, because the bicycle is much easier to balance when moving quickly, it's very difficult to travel that slowly.
>>926903
>Abusing SI prefixes and unit symbols
Please re-read the SI Brochure.
>>926919
>who don't understand how to fucking walk
Are they wards of the state? How can they feasibly go about their daily business by walking so slowly?
>>926968
I think you made a mistake: the poster you replied to implied that he is not a cager.
>>926993
>orders of magnitude
Please re-read the SI brochure
>>926993
>doing gods work
Keep at it m8! We're all rooting for you.
>>926998
Are we?
>>925929
>Le road tax meme
>>926066
>posting your home address on 4chan
>>926997
I've lost the copy of my SI brochure, it fell a couple of inches down the back of my stove, and there's only 2mm of space so I can't get it out.
>riding bike in the middle of road
>at stoplight
>guy in lane next to me says i should move over
>say "NO U MOVE OVER!!!!"
>tearing up
>he says "are you gay, bro?" as he drives off
>go to the nearest walmart and cry in the bathroom for 3 hours
>>929918
Are you gay, bro?
>>926678
>Generalizing
Your almost as bad as people who thing all motorists are cagers.
>>925785
>that pic
how does it feel that i'm way faster and more comfy on my motorbike than you with your bikes? also i'm not slowing down traffic, and can just ride to the front of every light like you can.
>>930224
That you have crap taste in motorcycles.
>>930225
i really dont
>>930225
>"how does it feel"?
>"that you have crap taste."
cyclists, everyone.
>>930224
it feels like not being a fat fuck who needs a mobility device to get around
>>930228
>tfw someone insults you for being fat over the internet while youre by no means fat irl
its a good feel. enjoy being slow, and enjoy being hated by every single motorist.
>>930226
So why do you own that Honda.
>>930230
>why do you own that honda
because it was cheap as fuck
the fact that i like it is just a nice side effect
>>930231
You've not succeeded in establishing that you have taste.
>>930233
i have though
>>930229
yeah yeah yeah you're just big boned blah blah blah. fuck off and cry into your tendies, squid.
>>930236
>tfw you will never reach the speeds you need to actually penetrate the back of a truck and get your head stuck in it
lel.
btw that guy survived and recovered fully.
>>930237
nah, he's ded, died in his quest for delicious tendies
http://www.snopes.com/photos/accident/tulsacrash.asp
>>930241
at least he died fast
get it
>fast
>>930237
>into farm slovenia
Slofam, on /n/?
>>930253
no i'm from austria i just travelled to slowenia with the bike and a buddy
>>930255
Oh, cool. I really like your bike! (although I know next to nothing about them, am cyclist myself)
>>930258
i only paid 1000€ but i had to do quite a few repairs on it
>>925803
Just take some trailmix along. I've bonked a few times just because a lot of my riding is offroad and sometimes you just burn more juice than you took on. Fortunately on a MTB you can just granny it on the road which is easier than walking.
>>925920
Hey mate, that butthurt your feeling isn't because of anger; it's your anus reflexively winking in anticipation of having those cycling stallions wrecking your shitcunt. It is my experience that those who moan most about "faggots" are usually the biggest cocklovers of all.
As the saying goes "methinks the closeted homo protests too much."
>>925929
>he thinks the cage tax pays for roads
They should call it the "lazy moron tax". What sort of a person thinks it's ok to pay money to go anywhere?
>>925943
>the advertising said that the big truck makes me look manlier
>>925945
I take it you're an aussie by your mannerism. FYI the biggest cost of "rego" is the compulsory third party injury insurance, required to cover the cost of the mayhem and carnage cause by shit drivers. Unfortunately the rate is the same even if you're a good driver, effectively subsidising shit drivers.
The vast bulk of road money comes from general tax and council rates; again subsidies. If there really were a pay to use scheme, car driving would be way too expensive for many, which is why it causes so much butthurt every time it's discussed. Cagers are even butthurt about paying tolls on roads exclusively built for them. Cars are SOCIALISM, so take that fucking commie-cage to China, PINKO!
>>925951
Cagers don't into F=MA.
>>925968
>I am justified in acting like a total retard because I had a 'bad day'
Take your feels and shove them up your ass through your bike shorts
>>925968
I agree seeing them trying to squeeze past just to be stuck up the ass of the car in front is amusing, doubly so when you just roll right by them on the inside a few seconds later. xD
I love riding my big MTB on the road it puts me upright so I can see all around, and I love popping off onto the nature strip and rolling some offroad manuals while passing traffic. xD
Cagers are so butthurt.
The only issue I ever have with cyclists is when they ignore intersections.
Follow right of way laws, and stop at intersections as required. Other than that, I don't care about you.
>>930571
I follow right of way laws and I stop and look at intersections, but if there's a gap in traffic I'm going for it. The cagers behind me appreciate that because it means I've usually made it to the next light before they even start down the block.
In my area the main thing that cagers need to understand is that left turn means being in the left lane. Most of them get it but the ones from Staten Island and shit holes like that seem to think left turn means go on the sidewalk. They should demolish the bridges that connect that place to the rest of the world.
ITT: white boys with baby tears
>>925989
This is your thing, isn't it? You hang out here waiting for kph vs km/h and boom! You strike.
"Hey, guise; it's gonna be cold today- still wanna ride? -Well how cold? -Oh, about 270.15 K."
You have a rather elaborate and unique personal hell.
>>926009
wat?
>>926019
>The thing that's absurd is a "city" that doesn't have any tall buildings that lack helipads.
Still trying to figure out what this means.
Here comes my editor, hold on...
>>926298
I have cars, motorcycles, and bicycles; I have no problem with bicyclist when riding and we often are in the same spots because we're after the same thing; beautiful, back road scenery with hills and curves. And we're both in the environment, as opposed to sitting in a living room with a steering wheel.
>>930618
I would be more inclined to express such a temperature by way of comparison to the reference temperature, T_0.
>>930618
>-Oh, about 270.15 K
Unit kph:
So, "kilo per hour"? 1000x / h = 1000 / 3600s = 1/36 Hz, or put in words "cycles in 36 seconds".
What a weird unit.
>>930620
>cooked medium
into
the
trash
it
goes
>>926000
He's right, SF is definitely easier to travel on bike pretty much anywhere in the city.
>>930988
>Implying 'p' symbolises 'per'
Please re-read the SI Brochure
>>930496
It really is faggy though to block the whole lane when you don't have too. Or take to the shoulder to let the car pass.
MSPaint drawings about delta angles and vision lines need not apply, by the way.
>>925997
You can get from Ocean Beach to Financial District faster on a bike than in a car? Exelsior to the Presidio? No.
>>930994
It's pretty good, and traffic for cars is pretty bad, but damn if some of those hills don't look tiring after a while.
>>931163
>I have an irrational objection to safe and effective bicycle riding practices
>Please don't try and dispel this prejudice by presenting me with facts that are inconsistent with it being rooted in reality
I'm sorry Dave, I can't let you do that.
Cagers:
>pay the government to travel
>pay arabs for oil, directly funding islamists
>can only travel where the government allows them to
>are brainwashed into thinking that driving a penis compensator is manly
>can only impotently rage at the vehicle in front becase they can't get past
>atrophied body
>degenerate mind
>beta
Cyclists:
>use their god-given legs to travel freely
>pay no rent-seekers
>are the engine
>can easily go around or over any obstacle
>healthy
>happy
>alpha
>>930255
I like your bike m8, shame there's fuck all room for any luggage though.
I have situations like this quite a bit and not sure if I'm at fault or the car is.
I'm cycling along and someone pulls out of their driveway, I stop for them, but it's like they either didn't fucking look at all, or can't see me because I'm in their blindspot.
I know once it happened then the woman looked left noticing me, slammed her brakes on and apologised and let me go. But it happened the other day and I made sure I was where she would be able to me in her mirror but she still just reversed out into the road and it didn't seem like she knew I was there.
>>931631
It's their fault. You count as a vehicle in a lane of traffic. A car pulling out of a driveway and entering a street has to yield to traffic.
>>931631
It's their fault, always expect the cager to actively try and kill you.
>>931631
>can't see me because im in their blindspot
not applicable, bro. even if you're in full view on a bright sunny day, a cagers mind is too simple to comprehend letting a smaller vehicle have the right of way
>>931631
Learn to whistle
>4way stop
>suddenly everyone forgets how 4 way stops work and try and just gun it even though they're not the last to pull up
every time
also
>mfw mad cagers trying to yell something at me
>unaware of the doppler effect
>HEYOMAWACHSNJAAAAAAAAaaahhh
>>931913
Why don't you get roundabouts like everyone else?
>>931978
Literally americans are too stupid. They tried to add one near my town and no one knows what the fuck to doing.
>>932059
> to doing
I guess that includes you
>>925803
>Don't really know how much food to bring coz it adds extra weight. So I've only been going for 2 hour rides maximum with some fruit and even then I'm hungry again when I get back.
Absolute pleb
Fruit is literally the most idiotic idea I have ever heard
Before you go riding, get a lot of energy, with low GI - the best food is oats, really. Obviously eat a few hours before riding. You could eat fruit and yoghurt and shit too then if you want. And protein as well would be good for you, so scrambled eggs would work.
For food that you take with you, you just want the densest, most energy packed shit you can get. Flapjacks, small nutella sandwiches, jam tarts, bananas are also good, also you can get gels if you want. This is what the pros take with them. You just want stuff that can replace your calories as quickly as possible - obviously you don't want to have to digest an entire meal out on the road.
For post-ride food you want a nice healthy recovery meal, something like chicken and rice with broccoli. Lean protein, replacement carbs like pasta or rice (I've read that rice is the ultimate recovery food, I can't remember why though), and of course as many vegetables as you can eat, preferably green ones.
Also watch GCN videos about this on YouTube because they're pretty smart on all this stuff.
