How about those selfish mares, eh?
>New GoogleDoc Pastebin Archive:
>https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aoh8YH3I0q78czAnb9mt_4h5jUeCUbivFV5WhAh935U/edit?pli=1
>Old CrazyRain's Stories' Archives:
>http://pastebin.com/C82B4dea
>>26155971
>>26156152
>>26156157
>>26156206
>>26156211
Why don't repost some old ass green?
DesuStorage is running again, and has all the material.
Maybe some writefags will be back if we keep going or someone will take and old green that was left to die.
Who knows, maybe someone that can finnish Oblivious Anon or Magical Boy.
Or the other with the spanks, i personally like Magical boy anon more, but it died sometime ago
what is a stallion to do when a little filly crushes on him
>>26156457
what is a stallion to do when several fillies crush on him
>>26156457
Go through with it. It's not like it would be illegal. It's a stallion, and stallions are predators like mares are.
Question:
How much time would you say has passed since The Return of Harmony and season 5?
>>26156560
Literally, or in the context of a story?
If the prior, fuck if I know.
The later, it's like, 10-12 years prior
>>26155522No one treats the strike seriously until Sombra comes in as the speaker for Stallion's rights. Celestia and Luna come in about a week later saying, "Yeah, we wanted to fix our sexist government system, but we didn't have a reason to till now. Here you go." Then the Mane 6 herd with Sombra, except for Pinkie who was already in a herd with Mr. and Mrs. Cake.
Stallions on Strike focuses mostly on family problems, so if you like Slice of Life, go ahead.
>>26156457
Cocksock her, train her to fit his tastes, fill her with fillies of her own as frequently as possible, repeat as often as necessary.
>>26156457
>>26156531
>>26156533
>Big Mac cocksocks the CMC, including Apple Bloom & Babs Seed.
>>26156675
Thanks for the rundown. Now that I know it isn't as silly as I thought it might be, I might check it out.
>>26156746
Has anyone ever taken this idea seriously? I think it could be interesting with the right writefag.
>>26156746
s-should not unf
>>26156831
Shouldn't, but totally does.
>>26156831
Which satyr is this?
>>26156831
At some point, most children, regardless of species, will try to find a male to take them as their cocksock.
It's not weird at all for that male to be their father.
>>26157218
Ivy. Fluttershy's daughter.
>>26157234
Aren't the Fluttershy kids part of the reason the Satyr threads are as fucked up as they are?
>>26157253
Ivy? Kinda.
Thorn? Not really.
Timber? Absolutely.
>>26157234
>It's not weird at all for that male to be their father.
uh
>>26157264
Them and Snapshot, right?
>>26157234
Hold on I have an idea.
>CMC try to get Anon to take them as his cocksocks.
>They keep doing lewd things (or at least what they think is lewd) in front of him in an attempt to be enticing.
>It just confuses Anon.
>>26157291
Simmer, Timber (and Ivy), and Snapshot, in that order.
>>26157286
By their norms, Anon.
>>26157291
>>They keep doing lewd things (or at least what they think is lewd) in front of him in an attempt to be enticing.
Actually sounds adorable.
>>26157333
>The CMC ask their respective big sisters how to get a stallion's attention.
>Rainbow Dash tells Scootaloo to show off her chest fluff.
>Rarity tells Sweetie Belle to be a gentlemare.
>Applejack tells Apple Bloom that stallions like gifts, going off what she remembers of their parents.
>>26157438
"Hey ,Applebloom, whatcha got there?"
>"It's a present for ya 'Non"
"Oh you shouldn't have."
>"Go ahead and open it"
"Uh, Applebloom, what is this?"
>"It's ma tuft in a box, we horsemarried now 'Non"
>Fucking tiny horses man.
>Anon is a finally reaches wizardom
>tfw no magic powers
>winds up in Equestria, is now a real wizard
>Has to fend off horny mares trying to steal his mana
>>26157472
>"Oh, let me get the door for you Anon!"
"It's fine, Sweetie Belle."
>"I insist! HNGh!"
>You watch as the small filly strains to push open the human-sized door to your house.
>You shake your head and do it for her, causing her to stumble forward.
>"Hey, I said I got it!"
"You don't need to do that, Sweetie."
>Fucking tiny horses man.
>>26157490
thats a good idea
also
>mares who do manage fuck him gain a massive power boost
>regardless if unicorn or not
>all the magic mares including
>communist pony
>trixie
>sunset(somehow)
>and of course twiggles
>>26157490
>Archmage anon, master of sorcery
>somehow stuck in horseland, something is screwing up all attempts at dimensional portal magics.
>these small horses keep thinking you are helpless despite having full range of your magic, aside from dimensional shit
>time to fuck with these little horses
>>26157526
"You only want me for my magic!"
>"That's not true, Anon! You have a nice butt too..."
>>26157438
Wasn't there a green about this?
>>26157490
IM GONNA FUCKING LIGHTNING BOLT THESE BITCHES
AINT NO ONE TAKING MY HARD EARNED POWERS
>>26157550
>these small horses keep thinking you are helpless despite having full range of your magic, aside from dimensional shit
>time to fuck with these little horses
Oh man I would read it so hard.
>>26157550
>>26157609
Seriously, stories with a protagonist that have limitless power and use it solely to fuck with everyone around them are my favorite.
>>26157550
New head cannon, this is Discord's back story.
>>26157672
>>26157672
Discord just proves stallions are too temperamental to handle real responsibility.
>>26157438
"Oh hey, Scoots, what's up-"
>Scootaloo is visibly trying to poof up her chest
>her muzzle is scrunched up and sweat is beading on her forehead
>she looks like she's about to pop a blood vessel
"Uh, Scoots?"
>[strained horse noises]
>her wings begin buzzing as she ties to fluff it up more
>her face starts turning blue under the strain
"..."
>in a final burst of fluff, Scoots passes out on your doorstep
>you slowly close the door
>fucking tiny horses man
>>26157778
>Implying Eris doesn't just maintain a masculine appearance to fuck with people, because chaos.
>>26157812
>>in a final burst of fluff, Scoots passes out on your doorstep
kek
>you slowly close the door
what the fuck man
>not taking her inside to make sure shes alright
>>26157520
>>Fucking tiny horses man.
That's the plan, anon
>>26157472
>anon, being completely clueless when it comes to horselaws, buys it
>he freaks out and tries to seek a divorce in canterlot
>luna and celestia wouldn't let him live it down for months
>>26157992
"What do you mean that's not a law?"
>"Anonymous, there are no laws about giving a gift and forcing the other party into marriage."
>"Nowadays that is..."
"What was that last part?"
>"What our sister meant to say, is that thou art free to copulate with any of our subjects as thou choose, or if our subjects aren't enough, perhaps we can better serve you."
>"Oh boy look at the time, gotta go, Anon things to do."
>You book it as fast as you fucking can out of there.
>Fucking god horses
>>26157899
>"Why are you so against us being your cocksocks, Anon?! Do you.... think we're ugly?"
>Oh boy
"You gotta understand, Scoots. Where I come from, having sex with kids is generally considered as REALLY bad. As in, it's so illegal that I'd go to jail for a while."
>"That sounds weird. And that's not how things are here!"
"But you understand why I'm... hesitant of doing anything sexual with you?"
>"I guess."
"Don't be so sad. Maybe when you're older?"
>>26157567
Yeah, and like all stories in the thread, it's still unfinished.
>>26158063
>passing up sleeping with two essential goddesses
>>26158375
Ruining them for all stallions. Far in the future they become debauched mirrors of who they once were, all to feel whole once more.
>>26158375
Because I don't want to contract something she may be a carrier for. Goddess sluts probably give me something that'll make Captain Longschlong become blacker than Aunt Jemima and fall off.
>>26158432
>implying stds exist in equestria
>implying even if they did they could cross species
>>26158459
>Implying that Equestria isn't a land of magic where bullshit happens daily
>IMBLYIN
>>26158459
Cross-Species Transmission is exactly how HIV/AIDS, SARS, and Ebola happened. Cross-Species Transmission is how Swine/Bird Flu got their name.
>>26158500
An oldie, but a goodie.
>Be Anon in Equestria.
>Immediately drop dead from alien germs.
Enjoy your no fun allowed.
Anon becomes ambassador to tartarus. Succubuses are not used to the attention.
>>26159460
Fund it.
>>26159460
Yes.
>>26157291
>You are Anon.
>"H-hey! Anon! I b-bet you want some of th-this!"
>And some little filly is hitting on you.
"Sweetie, what are yo-CHRIST"
>Sweetie Belle, tail raised, is standing on your patio table and shaking her ass at you.
>No thank you, ma'am.
"Sweetie, hey, woah."
>You pick the filly up by her midsection and spin her around to face you.
"You tryin' to get your cutie mark in...."
>Uh....
"Twe-dancing?"
>You really want to know if there's a pony out there whose special talent is twerking.
>That would just complete your life.
>Sweetie Belle shakes her head and giggles at you.
>"Nope! Rarity says that if I want you to make me your cocksock, then I have to show you my bum stuff."
>There are no words for this.
>Only disgust.
"Cocksock. What is- you said 'cocksock'."
>Sweetie nods, looking pleased that you're catching on so fast.
>"Yuppers! You put your thingy in me and use me to make you feel good, and I get, uh..."
>She looks like she's struggling to remember what she was going to say.
>"Rarity calls it, 'on-the-job training."
>She smiles brightly at you before turning around and showing you the goods again.
>"It's like how Missus Cheerilee sometimes keeps me after class and licks my-oops!"
>No, wait, what?
>Go back, please.
>Sweetie Belle looks over her shoulder and gives you an apologetic look.
>"I wasn't supposed to say that. Missus Cheerilee says that she could get in trouble if I told anypony about that."
>You're learning so much today.
>>26159577
KEEP GOING
>>26158459
STDs do cross species. That's how we got AIDS. Hell, most of the worst diseases in history came from farm animals. What gives a cow the sniffles or a pig a cough KILLS humans.
>Disregard sexually flirtatious grade schooler.
>Go inform Rarity and police about Sweetie being abused.
>Watch with satisfaction as abusive teacher is carted off in chains.
>Be there emotionally more for Rarity more than Sweetie.
>Walk filly to after school counseling sessions because she trusts you.
>>26159903
>Fuck the shit out of her older sister.
>Become Sweetie's Uncle.
>But not the creepy kind
>>26159577
Someone's putting their special talent to good use i see
>>26159903
>Anyone getting in trouble.
>Not rewarding it.
It's like you don't even understand the concept of cocksocks.
>>26158500
>>26159772
The difference in this case being that the cross species vector happens between two organisms that evolved in the same ecosystem. Assuming that humans and ponies are from different worlds / realities, the viruses would have evolved with those ecosystems in mind.
>>26160076
except cheerilee is a mare, which makes it abuse
>>26159577
>>26159903
>You are Anon, a good few days later.
>You just woke up from a nap, having spent the last couple of hours keeping Rarity company while this whole 'Cheerilee' thing blows over.
>Rarity took it much, MUCH harder than Sweetie Belle did.
>Sweetie was fucking pleased as punch at what was happening with her teacher, so it isn't like she'll have to go to therapy any time soon.
>"Oh, Anonymous! How could I have not seen the signs? Was I really such a terrible sister? Darling, please tell me I'm a good pony. Tell me this while you scratch my ears."
>Judging by the flowers she leaves for you next to your guest bed and the way she naps on your tummy, you're pretty sure that Sweetie Belle will be getting a new big brother/father-figure pretty soon.
>But that isn't important.What IS important is what you're going to do.
>As the last grainy eye-gunks of sleep are wiped from your eyes, you discover that you aren't alone in your room.
>No, it isn't Rarity.
>No, it isn't Sweetie Belle.
>It's.... Scootaloo?
>That tiny orange filly is watching you sleep.
>"Hey, Anon! Are you awake?!"
>She starts to jump in place in her excitement, which is HUGELY adorable to you.
>She's already better than Sweetie Belle.
>"Look what I can do!"
>....and that opinion goes WAY down after Scootaloo pulls out a banana from behind her, peels it, and starts to eat it.
>She does all this while staring you in the eye.
"Scootaloo? Why are you eating bananas at me?"
>.....Is this supposed to be some kind of racist joke?
>YOU GET IT
>YOU'RE A MONKEY
>HA HA
>Scootaloo holds up a hoof and swallows her mouthful of banana before speaking.
>"Rainbow Dash told me that I need to show you that I can shove things down my throat!"
>She takes another bite.
>"She also said that I should use bananas because you're a monkey."
>YOU FUCKING KNEW IT
"...So where's Rainbow right now?"
>You can feel a headache coming on.
"I think I need to have a talk with her."
>>26160180
>unending chain of events where fillys bother anon with ridiculous sexual things/attempts at romance
>anon slowly going crazy and just becoming more and more unhinged
Fund it
I want to see a story where Anon arrives with his home bringing this with him
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q65Wq9Cj5v0
>>26160417
I came.
>>26160180
what about applebottoms
>>26160417
>Anon puts on a show once he figures out how to electricity in Equestria
>Two days later he's contacted by Vinyl Scratch, who fucking funds his ass immediately
>Mares think that a male DJ is super FUCKING hot
>They all want the D
>Mane 6 are concerned for his safety and try to convince him to get away from the bright lights and fast-moving life of the city
>>26160417
Nigga please, if anon is bringing anything with him to Equestria and it's /not/ a solar powered computer loaded with all the knowledge and media of human kind, it must be this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxLB70G-tRY
>>26160546
Patience, friend. Y'all can live without my green for a day or two.I'm not up there with Shukaku or Frosty or BNW or anything.
>>26160180
That is an incredibly cute Scootaloo pic.
>>26128488
>Y'all are Applejack, an' you've jus' woken up from the most AMAZING nap you've ever been a part of.
>Better'n fallin' asleep after an honest day's work of apple-buckin'.
>Better'n accidentally drinkin' too much cider and taking a floor-nap.
>The reason it's so wonderful is 'cause yer hubby-tuh-be brought you up tuh yer house and aaallll the way tuh bed.
>Golly, Anawn carryin' y'all tuh bed lahke YOU were the stallion.
>Y'all ain't sure why, but that makes you feel tingly all o'er.
>He had better not get used to it, though.
>Let momma do the heavy lifting, y'hear?
>....Oh, right. Anawn.
>Oh, right! Anawn!
>Oh Great Apple above, did that colt do what y'all THINK he done did?!
>You hop up out of yer covers and start spinning in a circle, trying tuh get a good look at yer privates.
>This goes on fer 'bout ten seconds 'fore yer mind catches up tuh you and you realize jus' how buckin' stupid y'all must look.
>So, you simply sit on yer rump and look down towards yer tight, formally-virginal cooter.
>....Nope, no seed leakin' out from where the Great Apple intended it.
>You take a deep breath through yer nose.
>SSNNIIIIIIIFFF
>.....Nope, barely a hint of Anawn's scent.
>Buckin' dang-it.
>Oh well, y'all guess you'll have tuh give it another try.
>Yer an Apple, dammit, and an earth pony tuh boot.
>That means yer stubborn to an unreasonable degree, and yer proud of it.
>Clearly a from-the-front attack ain't working, so y'all need help.
>Maybe you can put on a show of what yer family done be like.
>He'd prolly 'preciate a taste of what he's gettin' himself into.
>Oh!
>You'll bet he'd be happy as a pig in shit if you got Granny tuh show him all the secret Apple family recipes he'll be learning tuh cook!
>Genius.
>An' they said that you'd never amount tuh anything after y'all dropped out after the 4th grade.
>Yer granny.
>Yer brother.
>Random ponies on the street.
>Just... just everypony.
>Ahem!
>Time tuh show Anon how to be an Apple.
>>26160682
I know, right? Scoots is the best CMC.
>>26160876
>You are Anon, and it feels like somebody is plotting your demise.
>You are now Rainbow Dash, weather reporter and Equestria's Eye in the Sky.
>You're currently circling around Applejack's farm, like the birdpone of prey you are.
>You really wish that you could have done more for Anon, but you've been busy hiding from the ponice.
>Man, fuck da ponice.
>Jay-flying is total bullshit.
>You've been flying for YEARS and there's more than enough sky for everypony, dammit!
>You gotta make it up to Anon
>Gotta make sure he knows that you've got his back.
>Show that you're a TURE friend.
>The turest of friends.
>Maybe even his BEST friend.
>And they say that best friends make best lovers, afterall.
>......
>You mean, MAYBE.
>You don't know.
>What?
>You are Anon again
>And you are under assault by a tiny baby horse.
>HNG-levels are off the chart, and heart hasn't reported to brain in over five whole minutes.
>"Say thar, Anawn; are y'all busy tonight?"
>Pfft, what, does this filly think you have a SOCIAL LIFE or something?
"Not at all, Bloomy."
>"Y'all gotsta come fer dinner! Granny's breakin' out all of'er best, oldest recipes!"
>Ooooooh.
>You tried one of their "best, oldest" dishes once.
>You legitimately came in your pants.
>It was very awkward for everybody in the room.
>Then again, Apple dinner implies that Applejack may be there, waiting for you.
>You hate to let the little filly down, but you can smell a trap a mile away.
"I don't know, Apple Bloom. This seems like a bad idea, considering the whole, "marriage" thing with your sister."
>Apple Bloom is not to be deterred, however.
>She breaks out the saddest, poutiest faces you've ever seen her muster.
>"Please, Anawn? Ah really lahke havin' you 'round the farm."
>You can see tears forming at the corners of her eyes.
>No.
>No!
>Stay strong!
>"P-please?"
>AAAAAAAAH
>>26160891
>Fuck it, FINE.
"....Alright. But just because you're so adorable."
>And before Apple Bloom can protest that she isn't adorable, you scoop her up and plonk her square on your shoulders and being to jog over to Sweet Apple Acres.
>You win THIS round, small child.
>Time skip: Din-din time.
>You are Anon, and you're actually having a legitimately nice dinner.
>You've got Apple Bloom to your left, and Applejack to your right.
>You've also got Granny Smith telling you about the time when the Great Depression found Abraham Lincolt buck-naked on her lawn.
>Also about how in HER day, colts did what they were told and were happier for it.
>You think you like her.
>She's the best combination of old southern charm and genuinely-worrying senility.
>"Ah Don't care whut thuh gov'ment says; Ah don' have tuh hire ziggers if'fin ah don' want ter!"
>Don't ever change, Granny Smith.
>You feel a poke to your right, and look over to see what Applejack wants.
>"Y'all like this apple-glazed cabbage head? Mah great-great-great-grand-aunt, Old Mare Pine Golden Pippin, came up with it."
>It's actually not that bad, all things considering.
>>26160906
"It's delicious, Applejack."
>She seems pleased with your answer.
>"Ah can show you the recipe later, if'fin y'all want. Jus' stay the night an' Ah'll fish out the ol' Apple Family Book of Recipes."
"Sure, I'd love t-Oooooh.... nice try, Applejack."
>She almost got you.
>Applejack turns back to her plate and lightly smacks the table in frustration.
>"Dangit!"
>She sulks in her seat for a few minutes, just watching you eat.
>When she sees you scooping some apple cobbler onto your plate, she pounces.
>"Y'all lahke that? That there done be muh second cousin thrise-removed Razor Russet's prize-winning dish right thar."
>She leans in real close, making you feel uncomfortable.
>"It can all be yer's, Anawn. Y'all know whut y'all gotta do."
>oh god you don't know what the opposite of an erection is, but you've got that.
>Out on nowhere, there's a crash!
>Rainbow Dash has flown in through the window and lands on the dining table, scattering food everywhere.
>Why would she DO that?!
>>"I've got your back, Anon!"
>Well, this evening has turned into a shit-show.
>You scamper out of the house in the ensuing chaos.
Done for tonight, I think.
>>26159966
I don't think that's how uncles work
>>26160941
kek
fucking dash
i love dash
>>26160680
personally id put you up there in that tier but thats my opinion
>>26156746
10/10, would groom.
>>26156773
It's actually very funny and on point too. I was very worried about something dumb at the end with Celestia outtrolling everyone, but no. Sombra is quite good politician and troll himself.
>>26160891
>Show that you're a TURE friend.
I see what you did there.It's nice to be remembered, even if only by your grammar slip-ups.
So, have the incest-loving pedos fucked off back to their designated shitting streets yet?
>>26160180
>>"Rainbow Dash told me that I need to show you that I can shove things down my throat!"sorry for >nohooves
Much to Cadence and Shining's horror, the Crystal Ponies are a lot more war-like than their Equestrian counterparts, being from a harsher time.
tl;dr: shit happens, and Anon --who was chilling in the Minotaur Lands-- is taken as the only "war-bride", to be given as 'tribute' to either Cadence, Luna, or Celestia.
Even better is that unlike the minotaurs, he can't understand the ponies, and they him.
>Be Anon in Equestria
>All in all it was a pretty sweet deal when you first got here
>Horses treated you like a king and would do anything for a taste of that hot monkey dick
>Sure, there were downsides
>But you could get past those with effort
>Now though everything has gone to absolute shit
>Other Anons made it through the portal and the first thing they did is fuck everything in sight
>Not only do humans have a reputation of being sluts now, half pony half human monstrosities are everywhere
>Even worse is the fact that the saytr offspring is now breeding with their own human fathers
>Creating a downwards spiral of incest and heresy throughout the entirety of pony culture
>Now even cute little fillies want their holes stuffed by the nearest rod around
>It had finally gotten so bad that you've decided to go to Celestia to try and get these fuckers removed
"Can't you do anything? They've mutilated pony culture into being entirely about incest and satyrs! I just want my RGRE back."
>"Anonymous, while I agree with you we cannot just throw poor stallions back into the Everfree. Where would they go?"
"Can't you just build a town for them away from the rest of us, like a General area they can stay?"
>Celestia internally debates with herself for a moment before replying
>"But what if they do not wish to go?"
"Then make them go to pony prison until they agree to stay in their General area."
>And so it was done, mares were in an outcry about it but stallions were glad to see the back of the child abomination fuckers
>Some refused to stay in their general area and were sent to pony prison
>Protests spiked up about stallions not being able to survive in that enviroment but they were free to leave at any time
>Pony towns eventually went back to the norm of minor sexism and everything was good as the satyrs turned their town into a shithole
The end.
I wonder how things would go if Anon had a more "old-time"-view of women, being an ultra-sexist mans man, telling the mares to stay in the kitchen, bemoaning the fact that they've elected a female mayor (and that mares are allowed to vote).
Ponies don't know how to deal with this uppity, stallionist colt who wants mares to act like stallions.I mostly want to see this to see the chaos of their polar views as Anon treats the mares as they usually treat him in these stories.
>>26160941
Any Dashie can save that poor stallion from himself
>>26160417
Are you the hurdy gurdy guy? Is your mission here to bring us interesting musical things?
>>26160576
>He starts dating Vinyl
>They take turns DJing and partying
>She's worried about him becoming a typical party colt, like the last few she had
>But Anon would never do that to her and worries the same about her
I just want more green with Vinyl.
>>26163140
That sounds cute actually, cuddles after a misunderstanding or Anon beating up a mare for trying to take Vinyl's place.
>>26163092
Oh god. Humans are the niggers of poneworld.
>Come in droves
>Fuck everything in sight
>Local populace start fetishizing them and spouting out how good at sex they are
>They leave bastard children all over the place
>Government gives them their own places to live
>Them and their offspring occasionally trickle out and start fucking everyone they can
Anyway, good allegory. I like allegories.
>>26163097
I'd like to see this too.I was thinking about /pol/ in Equestria the other day.
>>26163140
>>26162862
Nah, man. This has been my only general for a couple of months.
>>26162862
I don't even want to bring up satyrs as they cause this.
>>26156330
This (unfortunately unfinished) fic could be turned into a nice RGRE story-
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/79361/at-their-service
>>26163283
>That warning at what it contains
I had a giggle.
Did Shukaku decide who gonna be Venus' new mom?Cuz I have a candidate.
>>26163353
I did, but haven't told anyone yet.
>Anon starts hang out with TreeHugger.
>All pones think she's a bad company and Anon can get in trouble with her.
>>26163140
yup and I have more for when things stall again
>Anon hits bong with TreeHugger
>Fluttershy joins up
>Weed becomes cool
>Everyone in Equestria turns into TreeHugger replicas
>>26163424
I'd read it.
>>26163424
She was so unconcerned so I don't know how she could be a bad company.
>>26163272
Wake me up when the degenerates die off, ok?
>>26163507
Oh Anon, didn't you know?It's 2016.
>>26163507
We can't wake you when you're dead, Anon. Stop being boring, for your own sake.
>>26163505
You know, it's just like old people don't like hippies.
>>26163535
>>Wake me up when the degenerates die off
>We can't wake you when you're dead, Anon.
Hah, I get it. Funny joke. Everypony laughs.
I'm okay with this.
>>26163587
Think she can bend steel with those eyebrows?
>>26163353
Ugh. No. Not her. I've read some stuff where she's okay, but she's meh-tier for background pones.
>>26163395
We await your bidding, my master.
What if Anon doesn't take a wife? He remains a single male father for the whole story.no, this does not mean I'm doing this for sure, it's just a possibility, however small.
Also, I'm interested in seeing who people actually want as a mom to Venus. Attach suggestions to this post and I'll make a poll.
>>26163283
I'd buy it.
>>26163652
A timberwolf.
>>26163652
Luna.
>>26163652
Discord
>>26163652
Luna
>>26163680
This guy gets it.
>>26163652
Dickbutt
>>26163652
Fleur
>>26163652
I'm down to clown with a single male father, but getting horsemarried is cool too.
>>26163652
Luna.
I want to see her confrontation with Cadence.
>>26163688
>>26163707
Please avoid posting already posted names. Once said, they will be on the poll.
>>26163707
>Luna.
>I want to see her confrontation with Cadence.
Oh shit, I hadn't thought of that. Luna might understand why alicorn pregnancies have to be carried to term given how old she is. Throw in some weird species superiority thing, make her come complex than muh husbando, and you've sold me.
>>26163652
Prince Blueblood
>>26163652
Big Gala.
>>26163652
Twilight.
Just because you hate her.
>>26163778
She's a cutie here.
>>26163707
The only way I can see this playing out is if Luna kidnaps Venus, gets attached, and anon rescues her
>>26163784
She's about 8 years younger than Anon though. By the time she's of legal age (ignoring cocksock stuff) Venus will be CMC age.
>>26163778
One of my favourite weird headcanons.Apple family firstborns have always been males, since almost the recorded history of the apple family. Until "big mac". She has to pretend to be a colt to not bring discrace to the ponyville line of the apple family.
>>26163652
Cadence
>>26163822
Eris should be the mother.There's not enough Eris
>>26163812
>Ignoring your cocksocks.
You should know better than this.
>>26163652
I'd rather see him with someone because it carries the implication that he managed to move on.
I'd love to see Applejack, since family is so important to her that I can only imagine her reaction to candybutt coming back after abandoning Venus
I also think Derpy would be interesting, two flawed people coming together to form a familyand Venus possibly having a sister in dinky
rando crystal empire pony would add political intrigue, since it basically means Cadence is pulling a prima nocte.
Ignore the rest of this post because it involves a previous candidate
>>26163727
>Luna despises Cadence for wanting to throw a possible alicorn away because she didn't feel like having a foal
>most likely after ages of wanting a foal of her own
>loves Venus as her own, but has mixed feelings about anon giving cadence a foal before she did
>acutely aware of anon's growing anxiety from the situation due to his dreams/nightmares
>get a sequence where she hops into everyone's dreams one night to see how they really feel without a front
>part of anon just wants to help cadence so she can have a happy family, but he's so afraid of losing Luna. Just absolutely terrified, and he doesn't want to hurt her or break her heart in any way. Worried what Venus will think of him.
>ends with a feelsy conversation with Venus, mother to daughter
>>26163652
Chrysalis
>>26163707
This.
>>26163652
Bacon horse.
Enough replies, poll is up.
http://strawpoll.me/6584009
>>26163881
>>26163848
Applejack and Bacon horse have the same problem as Twilight. They're about 8 or 10 years younger than Anon.
Derpy is a grey area, but she seems like a pony from cloudsdale who moved to ponyville, And Anon will mostly remain in Canterlot.
>>26163888
I'm rooting for luna or fleur
>>26163652
A loving step-mother would create conflict.
First, between her and Venus until or if Venus accepts the 'interloper' in her and Anon's lives, and secondly between the step-mother and Venus against Cadence, when Love Horse takes a prominent role later on in the story, again.
I personally vote Luna if she's to be introduced when Venus is a teenager, or a mare like Fleur or even Cheerilee if it's when Venus is young.
>>26163918
Why not Celestia?
>>26163934
I think at this point Everyone wants Celestia to be the cool Aunt who spoils Venus whenever she comes over.
>>26163947
Aunt Celestia and uncle Discord.
With stepmother Luna.
>>26163934
She's too vanilla for a good conflict with her diplomatic approach.
>>26163947
This is my favorite part right here. No matter who Anon ends up with Auntie Celestia sounds amazing.
>>26163958
You. I like you.
>>26163958
Man, fuck Discord. I'd not let this fucker be near my child.
>>26163958
>uncle Discord
A wacky uncle, with the power of god. He simply adore Venus and no one, or rather nopony would like to get on her bad side because of him.
I'd read that.
>>26163947
While having Luna be the mom makes sense for Celestia being the aunt, I want both of them to be aunties. Celestia is the cool one who spoils Venus, while Luna is the tougher but still loving aunt who bonds with Venus whenever she finds out that they share a common interest in something.I'm rooting for Fleur.
>>26163840
Some characters will never get any green unless you type it yourself. She's one of them.
>>26163888
I hope it will be old-fashioned fedora tipping Luna.
>>26164002
Like someone (possibly unknowingly) having a mob-boss for a godfather or 'uncle', heh.
>>26164019
Last time I wrote I got screamed at for writing characters a bit out of character.
>>26164093
Tough titties.
>>26164093
Disregard the autistic spergs, they will shitpost about anything
>>26164093
context?
>>26163888
>http://strawpoll.me/6584009
discord 4th place
jesus christ you guys...
>>26164119
Celestia didn't like cakes.
>>26163888
Welp, it looks like we're going to see Luna turning Cadence into a fine paste.Can't beat the classic
>>26163888
False dichotomy! No Derpy included! Abort! ABORT!
>>26164155
>Abort! ABORT!
That what Cadance said.
>>26164155
>9 options
>dichotomy
>>26164178
>>26164155
Tard horse a shit. A shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
>>26164155
I explained here: >>26163897 why no derpy.
>>26164178
Well played.
63 votes, 57 posters in thread.
When you gonna call it, Shukakakakakkaku?
>>26164281
Write in Discord as a self-proclaimed uncle of Venus, and give Anon a pet timberwolf.
>>26164313
Once this guy who's trolling the poll gets timber wolf past Luna.
>>26164363
Luna plz
Since moonhorse won the poll, I'll get ideas down of how to fit her in.
Since it is moonhorse, however, she's not likely to come into the story for a bit.
Speaking of ideas, some just hit me.
>>26163140
But to everyone's surprise Vinyl
is a very traditional pony behind the DJ persona.
>>26164325
Please, Luna is obviously going to turn into a Timberwolf in Candys dreams to continuously fuck with her.
>>26164396
>dem puffy lips
Damnit Shuk, I'm in public. I don't have time to fap.
>>26164415
Throw caution to the wind, Anon. This is your time to shine.It's not like a colt would get arrested for touching himself in public, anyway.
>>26164415
>>26164396
>>26164415
i want to cup them
imagine the heat
>>26164436
f-fug
>>26164433
>>26164436
Welp, I know what I'm doing tonight.
>>26164396
You know, on a non-related note:
NMM's return is imminent, and Twilight panics like in canon, etcetera...
But, contrary to Celestia's expectations, her off-screen kidnapping by her deranged sister doesn't occur, so she ends up being where she was supposed to in the celebration plans (in canon, NMM appeared at this point: "Stay back, you foals!").
So, while raising the sun, Celestia's keeping a wary eye out.
And then the sun's rays hit some point visible like a hill, and she sees her sister, Luna and not Nightmare Moon, happily being banged by an ape-thing, Anon.
Yeah, turns out her banishment lasted for about a hundred years on another world, where she met Anon, her future husband (they later got married on Earth).
He basically fucked/romanced the anger out of her, and they're happily married/in love -- the last 900 years has been a massive honeymoon for them, and as a result she's pretty modern and well-adjusted.
Celestia's happy that her sister is back, free of her jealousy/Nightmare, albeit married which she's wary of/him.
But, Luna's original issue that she was unappreciated by ponies remains, though she's no longer bitter nor angry: Celestia wants her to retake her throne and resume her duties, but Luna's like, pft, fuck that and those ungrateful assholes, much to 'Tia's shock. Luna's more interested in settling down and having foals.
So, while they adjust to pony society and find a flat in Canterlot, ponies as a whole not only have to get used to the idea that Celestia has a sister, another Princess, but that she's also more like a regular mare than idol who likes to lay on the couch, drink beer and eat pizza.
Conflicts would be their finding jobs in RGRE, given that they've got Western, gender-equal attitudes; Anon being flirted with by mares; Celestia trying to lure her sister back to the Thrones while also trying to come to terms about her new brother-in-law and her sister's attitudes; culture shock, mostly.
>>26164529
>And then the sun's rays hit some point visible like a hill, and she sees her sister, Luna and not Nightmare Moon, happily being banged by an ape-thing, Anon.
i lost it
>>26164529
"...Sister?"
"Uh, babe?" Anon said, looking around, his pelvic-thrusts slowing. "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."
Luna blinked. "Oh, hi Celly! You're, er, not catching us at our best."
Celestia stared, open mouthed... as did the horde of ponies behind her.
"Anon, meet my sister, Celestia; Celestia, Anon."
"Nice to meet you at last," he said, smiling, offering his hand. Celestia looked down at it and drew back a fetlock, grimacing.
"Oh, sorry."
Luna face-hoofed.
>>26163652
Luna, or maybe Lightning Dust.
>>26164529
YESSSSSSS!
>>26163897
Not objecting since Best Princess Luna already won, but Isn't Bacon Horse older than Twilight?
>>26164577
kek
got a little bit of luna on his hands
>>26164645
MFW I read the rest of the thread, and realized I missed the shot.
>>26164577
"Oh, what. You're gonna act all squeamish?"
>"I. . . Of course!"
"Princess, please. Luna lost at Presidents and Assholes last weekend, and she talks when she gets silly. She told me allll about your first alicorn hea. . ."
>"L-luna?"
>"'Tis true, sister. I was the asshole."
>>26164679
By a few years, yes.
Strangely enough, Twilight looks to be the same age in pony/EQBomination Girl form, as do the other EQG/pony match ups.
>>26164771
My headcanon is that Sunset is around the same age as Shining and Cadence, but time moves A LOT slower in the EqG universe.
So it's been less time for her than it has been for Twilight, so there is less of an age gap between them.
>>26164711
"Love, don't even think of suggesting a threesome."
"But Lu," said Anon, pouting, "we have one every Tuesday!"
"Yes," the love of his life said, "but this is my sister! Sacrosanct! ... And a complete prude."
>>26164820
>"Love, don't even think of suggesting a threesome."
>"But Lu," said Anon, pouting, "we have one every Tuesday!"
nope
>>26164820
"Fine, fine. Plus, you were right, she's all plot and no teats."
>"Indeed. 'Tis quite tragic. Now resume the vigorous predatory plowing of my overwhelmed herbivorous holes. You promised to dehydrate me, and I will hold you to that."
>Meanwhile, all of Ponyville watches this exchange between Celestia, the new alicorn and the apelien.
>>26164848
It's not dubs, but there's gotta be a term for when you get something like '4848', someone help me out!
>>26164363
"It has come to my attention that you're with somepony else now, Anon. Is this true?"
>Sitting at the other side of the table, Anonymous rolled his eyes pretentiously.
>He was visibly annoyed by your question.
>"I don't see why should you even care, but yes, yes that's true."
>Truthfully, you were.
>You plan to meet and befriend his wife, who's at the same time your daughter's stepmother.
>It will be one of your first steps, into Venus good graces.
"C.. Can I get to know her?"
>Anon took a sip of his lukewarm coffee and sighed audibly.
>"Yeah, yeah."
>He turned his head toward the corridor and shouted.
>"Honey! Can you come to the kitchen for a moment!"
>A strange, loud bark was heard in Anon's house.
>Huh?
>Before you could even think about it, a large Timberwolf walked inside the kitchen.
>What the buck!
>You stood up immediately, your horn ablaze with offensive magic.
"Anon, look out! There's a Timberwolf behind you!"
>He looked at you as if you were touched in the head.
>"That's my wife, Cadence! What's wrong with you!?"
>You were dumbfounded.
"M-Me? Y-Your w.. WHAT!?"
>Anon glared at you, shuting you up.
>The large canine walked up to him and nuzzled his cheek with its erm... hers wooden head.
>"Honey, meet Cadence, she's Venus... egg donor."
>You've flatten your ears in shame.
>Mrs. Timberwolf looked at you with her glowing green eyes and started growling dangerously.
>Anon moved his hand and pet her on the neck.
>"Easy, darling. There's no need to get angry."
>She fell silent, but was still looking at you... accusingly?
>H-How dare she judge you!
>That... that pile of sticks and leaves!
>No, no.
>You need to stay calm and salvage this somehow.
"Anon, this is a bucking Timberwolf!"
>Nice save Cadence, buck you!
>Anon's gaze hardened.
>"Cadence I'm gonna have to ask you, to get the fuck out of my house. NOW!"
>...
>Your plan failed, ain't it?
>>26160876
>>26160891
>>26160906
what is going on with these filenames?
>>26164848
>Luna sighs.
>"Nearly a millennia and I still have trouble understanding your attraction to breasts, lover."
>You grin.
"Tits, Luna. Hooters, fun-bags--"
>"Yes yes," she says, rolling her eyes, "why else would I wear those fiendish contraptions women suffer on a daily basis?"
"Because you look hot in them and I do that thing you like but I don't?"
>She pauses. "Good point."
>>26164951
Moar!
>>26164911
This gives me a woody.
>>26164951
>All through this conversation Anon has continuously rutted Luna, pausing only when she orgasms to help her ride it out.
>The interspecies coupling couple have been going at it for a good ten minutes, and while the newly returned lunar princess is looking ragged, though pleased, her sister and the citizenry are a mixture of aghast, incredulous, and aroused.
>Anon smacks his hand against one dark flank, enjoying the Luna's response: a half-groan and knicker from her throat, and a hard milking from her vag.
"So. . . I polished off a bottle of Evan Williams before this all started."
>Celestia's mouth opens and closes, but no words come out.
>A series of muted splashes are heard from the crowd
"That is to say, we'll be at this for a while. Could someone hook a brother up and get some gatorade, or water or something?"
>The darker diarch shudders in pleasure again, as her lover pounds another orgasm out of her divine form.
>Anon grips his hand around her tail, and waves his other hand in front of Celstias face.
"Yo, Celestia. A little help? Lulu's right, I do owe her a marathon session tonight and I'll need to stay hydrated if I'm gonna have anything to give her for breakfast."
Oh hey
http://www.fimfiction.net/group/199206/stallions-for-equal-treatment
http://www.fimfiction.net/group/202242/herd-matriarchy-underpinning
>>26164951
>"Uh, Auntie Luna?"
>You glance over to your uncomfortable-looking niece and her paramour.
"Yes, Cadenza?"
>"I thought a 'double-date night' would involve us bowling or going to the theater, not..."
>Your beloved chimes in: "Pizza, beer, and horror flicks?"
>Cadence winces as a pony on-screen is decapitated, spraying blood over her terrified friends.
>"Oh come on, that's so fake! Where's the twitching, the rasping from the severed heads!"
>Shining Armour looks particularly pale now.
>Huh. Colts are a lot more squeamish these days, it seems.
>>26165095
HALF PLANT. HALF WOMAN. HALF WOLF.
THE PLANTWOLFWOMAN
>>26165152
>Not WoolfmanWood wolf woman
>>26165176
Ent werewolfs, fund that shit.
>>26165152
SPLINTERS IN YO DICK
>>26165110
I wish there was a way to filter anthro, humanized and a few other tags.
>>26165368
Yeah, there's a story that hits a lot of my buttons but its anthro'd to hell and back so it's confusing for my boner. If it was straight human or pone, I would be powering the eastern seaboard by the power of my fapping.
As is?
Meh.
>>26164904
I dunno, but /pol/ would be proud
>>26164904
Conjoined dubs?
Sorry folks for bothering you but was this the thread with Moondancer summoning Anon to get her cherry popped but then Twilight shenanigans? Or was it in the Anon in Eq thread?
>>26166312
yes that was here
>>26166312
Right thread.
>>26165400
The only problems I have with anthro pony stories is that ponies are almost always taller and stronger than humans which pisses of my hfy side
>>26164951
swollen mammory tissue is a visible sign of estrus in most or all mammals. Human breasts are the result of "runaway" sexual selection which started with females developing pads of fat which made them appear fertile when they aren't.
so ponies should probably react to anon's breast attraction less "WTF??" and more "he wants to start a family/ that boy is baby-crazy"
>>26166520
That's why minotaurs are so great.
None of that is fat, it's all super efficient mammary tissue.
Does Rarity sell pretty teat bras?
>"Twilight... I don't think that of this a very good idea..."
>It had been approximately twenty one minutes and thirty-three seconds since your husband and brother had left for parts unknown
>In that time you and the other girls had gotten quite a bit done
>Every door in the castle was magically barricaded and sealed
>Every hall and every room had the most powerful detection and listening charms known to magic placed strategically all over them
>You had even used your magic to turn some pots and pans that you had in the kitchen into battle ready helmets
>But even with all of the stuff that you and everypony else did, even after making treebrary 2.O into an actual fortress, you didn't feel very safe
>Not even a little bit
>By now the girls had come to their senses and you could see that they very much regretted what they said
>They realized that they had bucked up and they had bucked up bad
>Just like you they were jumping at very sound and eyeing every shadow
>You could see the shame on their faces and you could see it by the way that they walked and talked
>You could see shame and fear
>Every single one of you knew that all of these spells and charms could only get you so far with those two stallions
>You knew that with enough time and preparation Shining could bypass every little thing you did and walst into this castle if he wanted to
>Your bbbff could be behind you RIGHT now and you wouldn't even know it
>Fortunately, and unfortunately, you didn't have to worry about Anon sneaking into the castle to give you your comeuppance
>Nope, the light of your life would stomp up to your front door and start tearing into the castle with a sledge hammer while shouting obscenities at the top of his lungs
>And, to be honest, you didn't know which you'd prefer at this point
>You just HATED this waiting!
>It was just like waiting for a doctor to give you a shot
>You knew that the pinch was coming
>You could feel them moving that point toward you
>>26166937
>>26166937
It's waltz.
>>26166937
>But you just didn't know WHEN it was gonna poke you!
>Why didn't you just knock some sense into these mares when you had the chance?
>If you would have apologized you'd all probably be sitting in the living room listening to Anon and Shining as they told you about their trip!
>Anon would have been petting your RIGHT NOW!
>He might have even done that thing with your ears that you really like!
>...What a load of horse apples...
"I think you're right, Moony," you say, looking at everypony
>Not one of them could look you in the eye
>Alright Twilot
>You might have bucked up by not speaking out but now it's time to say something
>Time to end this nonsense so all of you can go and apologize
>...And maybe take a shower
>...Maybe more than one shower...
"So how about it girls? How about we go out and find our husbands and tell them that weren't sorry for being a bunch of oat heads?"
>"But we just finished fortifying the castle," Sunset muttered, rubbing her shoulder
>You all shuffle around, waiting for somepony else to speak up
>You had floated the idea out there, hopefully the girls would run with it so you didn't have to cower in your own bucking house!
>"The Great and Powerful Trixie is wearing a POT on her head," Trixie finally said, looking at each and everyone of you. "Trixie doesn't know about you girls but she thinks that this has gone on long enough."
>"Aye," Luna said with a nod, her pot-helmet very nearly falling off of her head. "Tis barely an hour and the colts have us ready to jump out of our fur."
>"There's nopony better at the mind games than stallions," Cadence agreed, lifting pot-helmet off of her head and tossing it away
>Though Starlight and Celestia said nothing you could see both of them looking at you with half smiles
>You sighed again, this time in relief
>Thank goodness that this wasn't going to get out of hoof!
"Alright then, why don't we--"
>"NOW WHAT THE HELL DID YOU GUYS DO? THERE'S NOT EVEN A FUCKING FRONT DOOR ANYMORE!"
>>26166984
>You all jumped, looking at each other with wide eyes
>"It looks like we have no need to look for our stallions, girls," Celestia said with a nervous giggle
>You all looked over toward the window
>"Yeah, I think you're right," Moony said, pushing her glasses up her muzzle
>None of you said a thing as you slowly shuffled out of the room and go into the other room so you could get out onto your balcony
>When you poked your heads outside you saw one heck of a sight
>Anon had a big oaken barrel slung over his shoulder and he was pouring water into this giant kiddie pool-sized tub
>There were about seven other barrels behind him with a little plastic table and two plastic chairs right next to those
>Shining was standing next to Anon sporting what looked like a bunch of bottles of shampoo along with a bunch of other bathroom accessories
>"Did you manage to get that oatmeal coconut soap?" Anon asked, setting down the barrel when the tub was all filled up
>Shining nodded
>"And I managed to get that special brand of mane and shoulders and that medicated shampoo that you wanted," Shining said, staring at your husband with a smile
>Anon grunted with a shake of his head
>"Good, if you so much as come near Sunny with any other kind of soap she'll break into a rash. And don't get me started with how bad Trixie's mane starts flaking when you don't make her use her shampoo everyday."
>"Do you think that we got enough green tea for Twilight to soak in? I remember when she was little how she'd lose clumps of fur if you didn't make her soak in it at least once a month."
>"She's gonna have to deal with what we managed to get. Even when I order that shit ahead of time they never give me enough."
>Once again a small crowd of ponies started to form within ear shot of Anon and Shining
>Many of them were smiling, looking up at you and the girls as your husband's casually talked about your special hygiene needs...
>Right out there were everypony could hear them...
>>26166933
No, but she does sell scrotum slings. Gotta keep that sack nice and perky!
>>26167057
>...
>...
>...
Was it getting hot out here?
>You felt a little hot under the collar...
>Making a face, Shining tossed some kind of powder into the water
>"I know what you mean! You know I was at the store one time to get tear free shampoo for Starlight because everything else hurts her eyes and they were out! And when I asked one of the salesponies when they were going to get some in stock they said that they didn't sell the bubble gum scent that she liked in the extra large bottles anymore!"
>You found yourself blushing in embarrassment as Anon let out a noise of disgust
>"You think that that's bad? I tried to get those fine-tooth brushes at the store the other day since Celly and Moony's manes like to fro up after they bathe and they started selling just those shitty all plastic ones! How the hell is a plastic brush going to be able to deal with all of that hair?"
>"If you think that that's bad you should hear about what I was trying to get my Luna the other--"
>"ENOUGH!" Luna roared, about as red as the rest of you were. "The commoners do not need to know about our... problem."
>"You mean the thing that Shining had to--"
>"Aye, THAT thing, Starlight. Nowhushupright now!"
>Glaring at her herd mate for a moment longer, Luna then turned her attention back to Anon and Shining
>Both of whom were smiling
>Your nose scrunched up at the sight
>Ohhhh! You'd bet your horn that they knew that you were there the whole time!
>The jerks!
>"Anonymous, husband, might We as why thou hast a tub of water prepared?"
>"Where the buck did they even get all that stuff?" Starlight muttered, leaning over the railing to get a better look. "They weren't even gone all that long..."
>Celestia looked at the whole set up with worry
>"Never dismiss a stallion's resourcefulness, much less our stallions."
>Anon's grin widened, his canines flashing in the sun
Wash them ponies.
>>26167110
>"I got you girls a bath ready," he chirped, slapping the wooden tub. "Me and Shining went out and got all of the stuff you needed and everything!"
>Reaching into his pocket Anon pulled out a little rubber dick and tossed it into the tub
>The duck bobbed in the water a few times before settling in the middle, it's little duck face...
>...Looming
>...That wasn't the right word but for some reason it was the first word you thought of
>The second one was SINISTER...
>That was a sinister little duck...
>"Now come on, the water might not be the warmest in the world but it's the best that you're going to get."
>You could hear a pin drop as you all milled over Anon's words and their implications
>Was he?...
>Did he really think?...
>He wasn't going to...
"You want us to take a bath out in the middle of the street?!" you blurted out, covering your teats with your hooves
>You needed to protect them from your husband's twisting
>His rough, painful twisting
>"I want you to take a bath, I want you to brush your teeth, and I want you to get your horns and hooves filed since I bet you all haven't done that since we left either," Anon said with a nod
>You could hear some of the townsponies openly laughing now but you ignored them
>You all had more important things to focus on
>Like your crazy husband for one
>"You... you have to be pulling our leg," Cadence said. "Shining, honey, you're not going to make us do this are you?"
>"Hey!" Sunset snapped, shoving the pink mare. "Don't you bucking try to get out of this because you're in a different herd!"
>"Unlike your husband my hubby is a bit more rational. He'd never make us do something like that."
>Smiling, Cadence looked down at her husband
>"Right hon?"
>Shining smiled, and Starlight, Cadence, and Luna smiled along with him
>You could see the hope in their eyes as they waited for their stallion's answer
>>26167158
>You and the other girls might have been up the creek without a paddle with Anon but if they played their cards right then maybe they could get out of this
>...Lucky bitc--
>"Nope. You girls are all going down together on this one. Sorry."
>If you weren't in the same situation as Cadence and her girls you might have started laughing when you saw their hopeful looks shatter into a million pieces
>Not in a mean way mind you
>More of a "you tried to flake out and it bit you in the butt" kind of way
>"W-WHAT?! Come on Shining!"
>Shining shook his head
>"Anon's right, you girls weren't too nice to your husbands when you saw them and now you gotta pay the price. Them's the breaks."
>"Alright then," Anon said, slapping his tub of doom again. "Now who wants to go first?"
>Celestia gently brushed past you and Starlight and leaned over the balcony
>"Husband, might I have a word with you for a moment?" she asked diplomatically
>Anon hummed, thinking her request over for a few seconds, before he nodded
>"Sure. Speak away Sunny Buns."
>Your old teacher turned a little red at the pet name but she smiled nonetheless
>"Thank you Anon. Now, I understand that you're more than a little upset, and you have every right to be. We didn't do our chores, we neglected our personal hygiene, and we told you to hit the road so we could finish our game."
>Celestia sounded a little melancholy saying this and you and a few of the girls looked away from your husbands in shame
>Yeah...
>That doesn't sound that great when somepony says it out loud...
>"The girls and I," she said, gesturing toward you, Sunset, Trixie, and Moondancer, "shouldn't have treated you like that. It was wrong and we were all raised better than that. You are our stallion, and we should do everything in our power to prove it. You deserve our love and respect, not what we did to you. So I, along with everypony else standing up here, wish to apologize to both you and Shining for our egregious behavior."
>>26165705
Nah sis, the number you're thinking of is 1488
Close though
>>26167218
>Many of the stallions watching this play out awed
>Shining awed
>Though she did her best to hide it, Trixie wiped a tear from her eye
>Yes!
>That was the best, most perfect thing that she could have said
>It was humble, heartfelt, and honest
>You wouldn't have thought of saying ANYTHING like that in a million years
>Even your husband, who had been twisting your teats like he had been born to do it (which he probably was, the crazy apelien) was wearing a genuinely happy smile
>"...You know what, hon? I appreciate that you stepped up to the plate and apologized, and better yet I'm glad that you did that AND you weren't just pulling it out of your ass. It takes a lot of courage to admit when you were in the wrong, and I accept your apology."
>Still smiling Anonymous tapped the side of the tub with his finger
>"Now come down here for your bath. I can smell you from here."
>Faster than the eye could see Celestia's smile vanished off of her face
>"But hon, now that we got that silliness out of the way--"
>"You are NOT using our shower," Anon interrupted with a shake of his head. "The smell would linger in our bathroom for god knows how long."
>Shit!
>You hadn't thought of that!
>The fledgling hope that you might have actually been saved vanished as you stared at the tub of water
>In your mind's eye you could see yourself sitting in that tub getting scrubbed down by Anon with all of those ponies watching...
>You'd be a laughingstock
>You and all of the other girls
>Whenever you showed your faces in town they'd say that you were a bunch of whipped mares that did everything that their stallions said
>You might not have been a drowning in cock alpha but you had a little respect amongst the populace
>But if your husband dumped you into a tub like a naughty foal and bathed you...
>Oh no!
>Oh sweet stars no!
>Everything'sgonnabetheworstforeverandever!
>>26167264
>"Come on girls," Shining said, beckoning you all with a hoof. "Let's get this out of the way so I can get in there and sanitize the horse apples out of Anon's house."
>Celestia bit her lip
>"Are you sure that I can't dissuade you?"
>She wiggled her rump, her eyes half lidded
>"The girls and I could give you the welcome you deserve~"
>...Wait!
>That was it!
>You could bribe Anon with sex!
>SEX WAS THE ANSWER!
>WHYHADN'TYOUTHOUGHTOFITBEFORE?!?!
>Shining and Anon looked at each other before throwing back their heads and laughing their flanks off
>Not two seconds later many of the stallions watching started laughing as well
>...Shit
>...
>...
>...
>Why does that never work?...
>"You think you're getting any cock after telling me to piss off?" Anon said in between giggles. "Apology or not you and the girls are in the doghouse, Sunny Buns. You're gonna have to work for this dick for a little while now."
>"Are you sure?" Trixie asked, shoving Celestia out of the way. "Trixie can do that thing with her mouth that you like! As long as Trixie doesn't have to bathe outside like... like some kind of animal!"
>Anon smiled
>"You are an animal, babe. same as me."
>He spread his arms out wide
>"Now come on and let's get you cleaned up. After we're finished I'll give you a hug and a kiss and everything."
>Luna's nose scrunched up
>"...Nay."
>Unfurling her wing she took off into the air, swooping down and landing right on the railing next to Trixie
>"We art Princess Luna: Lady of the Night and the Protector of Dreams!"
>Snorting, Luna looked down at the two stallions, her lips pulling back into a snarl
>"In ages past we spent lifetimes fighting beings which melted the minds of mortals with their very PRESENCE! WE ART NOT!--"
>Rolling his eyes, Shining's horn flashed with a burst of magic
>Luna stopped mid rant with a yelp, lurching forward dangerously
>You all cried out, trying to reach for her so she didn't fall off the balcony
>>26167305
>Thankfully Cadence managed to grab her tail with her mouth and yank her back onto the platform
>Unfortunately Luna, in her panic, began to flail her wings around
>One of these wings smacked Trixie right on the back of the head, sending her tumbling off the balcony and toward the ground
>"BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCUCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!"
>Five horns sparked to life, intend on grabbing Trixie and pulling her back toward safety, but Shining was too fast
>His horn sparked to life and you and the girls found yourselves encased in a bubble
>It wasn't a very powerful barrier but it was more than enough to break your concentration
"TRIXIE!" you yelled in panic
>"TRIXIE BLAMES SPARKLE FOR THIS!" Trixie yelled, closing her eyes and bracing herself for her impact with the earth
>Watching his wife fall in bemusement, Anon extended his arms and caught the magician with little effort
>"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
>"Trixie."
>"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
>"Trixie, honey."
>"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
>"Trixie, it's fine."
>"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
>"You're not falling anymore you silly horse. You can stop screaming now."
>Trixie's mouth snapped up and she looked up at Anon
>You all look down at her in horror
>"Trixie, run!" Cadence yelled
>"G-Get away from h-him!" Moondancer called
>"Run zigga run!" Sunset cried
>...
>Everypony standing up on the balcony gave her a look before once again looking down at the light blue mare
>...Bucking racists Sunset...
>Trixie blinks slowly, her rear legs resting on her chest as Anon looked down at her
>You could see the gears churning in her head
>Though the girls were yelling you knew that Trixie had no chance to get away
>Shining could make a barrier if she tried to hoof it and you knew what Anon could do if she tried to teleport or try to get away with her magic
>>26167062
Scrotal decorations. Like, clip-on earrings that pinch the skin.
>>26167371
>Anyway that you looked at it Trixie was going to get in the tub
>You knew it, the girls knew it, the bystanders watching the clusterbuck knew it, and so did Trixie
>The magician's eyes narrowed and her muzzle scrunched up
>Though her end was in sight Trixie did not beg
>She did not plea
>She did not back down
>The Great and Powerful Trixie was going to meet her fate like a mare, her head held right and her chest tuft fluffy and silky
>...
>...
>...
>See you space, cowgirl
>"FREEEEEEEEEEEEE-GMRPKTGNRTI!"
>You and the other girls could do nothing but watch as Anon tossed your herd mate into the tub of water, ripped her sweater and socks off, and started scrubbing her down
>While normally any of you would have LOVED to have your stallion's hoof spiders all over you it looked like he wasn't being all that gentle with poor Trixie
>In fact, if you didn't know any better, you'd have said that Anon was trying to drown her
>"HEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPP! SOMEPONY HELP TRIXIE!"
>"Twilight," Celestia said, eerily calm. "I do believe that we have some more fortifying to do."
>You nod
>"SAVE TRIXIE! SPARKLE! OERIGNEORINER! SPPPPPAAAAAARRRRRRRKKKLLLLLLEEEEE! SAVE TRI--DFJNEORNWRIN!"
"Yeah... I think that we could stand to to put up a few more spells," you muttered
>"And I'm sure there's some furniture we could use to block some of the hallways."
>You all nodded, stepping away from the balcony
>"TRIXIE SEES YOU--RFJEKVWVEF! SAVE ME! SAVE ME DAMMI-DAFVBEFVEVEIN!"
~-8-~
>"Are you sure that this outfit doesn't make me look fat? I swear I feel like a stuffed sausage in this thing!"
>You look up from your meal-- the first half decent one that you've gotten in two fucking weeks-- and at your brother-in-law
"It makes you look fat, Shining," you say, stuffing a slice of pizza in your mouth. "It makes you look huge, titanic, the biggest, fattest stallion that I've ever laid eyes on."
>Shining's nose scrunched up
>>26167421
>"It makes you look fat, Shining," you say, stuffing a slice of pizza in your mouth. "It makes you look huge, titanic, the biggest, fattest stallion that I've ever laid eyes on."
>Shining's nose scrunched up
You're wearing a fatsuit, Shining.
>>26167519
Gross.
>>26167421
LaP you raging dyke, stop writing good greens so I can tell you to go finish your other good greens
>>26167421
Is this done? You usually have the I'm Done post, but not this time.
>>26167421
>"Well you aren't supposed to say that! You're supposed to tell me that I look great! Slimmer than most stallions!"
"No, that's what a FRIEND would say, my dear Shiny," you correct, reaching over the table and ruffling the stallion's mane. "The two of us are KIN. It's my sworn duty to take the piss out of you whenever I can."
>Huffing, though you could see a little smile on his face, Shining started to fiddle around with his vest again
>"I swear that no matter what I do I just keep gaining weight--"
"I recall you declining whenever I ask you if you want to work out or go to the gym."
>"--I've tried every diet that I can think of--"
"For two weeks."
>"--I took that pilates class for MONTHS."
"You didn't even take it for a week before storming out of the place after that one stallion said that your headband looked tacky."
>Sputtering, Shining once again looked up at you, her snoser scrunching to dangerous levels
>"We all can't eat anything we want and be lazy like YOU, Anon!" he snapped. "SOME of us have to work to get the bodies we want!"
>Work?
>Wasn't this the same little horse that just ate two whole cheese pizzas by himself?
>Thank god he was on his hooves a lot, otherwise he'd be as wide as he was tall
>Rolling your eyes you finished up your last slice of pizza and stood up
"You look fine you big baby," you say, booping his nose. "I don't even know why the hell you changed out of that weird blanket thing to wear a vest to a pizza place but whatever."
>Fishing out a small bag of bits you toss them onto the table
"I think that I'm gonna go and hit the hay. I'm kinda beat after that train ride and all that wife tormenting."
>Pushing in your chair you grin at your brother-in-law
>"Don't you go and buy another pizza ya hear? You don't want to be rolling out of this place do ya?"
>You laugh as Shining throws obscenities at you as you leave the pizza place
>Shining might have been a bro but Christ above was he a little too easy to tease
>>26167669
>It didn't make it any less fun though
>Walking out into the night you put your hands in your pockets and make your way toward the hotel that you and Shining were staying at for the time being
>After your wives had watched you cleaning Trixie up not only did they not want you in the house but they made the place even MORE impenetrable
>The dirty horses didn't want to get clean it seemed
>And that meant that you were in the long haul with this
>Which was fine; you and Shining would pick them off one by one, spreading fear and terror in their ranks, cutting off their food supplies, and generally making their lives a heck of a lot harder
>And when you got them to their lowest point the two of you were going to rip through their ranks and crush them beneath you feet like the insects that they were
>Isn't marriage grand?
>You don't know what Shining thought about the whole business but you thought it was a fucking hoot!
>Eventually you made it back to the humble but cozy hotel at the end of town and make your way into your room
>There, waiting for you with a big ol' frown on her face, was the Great and Powerful Trixie
>Or, as you had been calling her, the Clean and Hygienic Trixie
>She didn't like it when you called her that
>So you did your best to use the title whenever you could
>Magician hoers had changed out of that grimy and nasty sweat shirt of hers (which Shining burned) along with those socks of hers (which Shining also burned) for a PJ top and some nice pink socks
>"Husband," she grumbled as you started kicking off your shoes
"Wife," you say teasingly. "Did you get that pizza that we ordered for you?"
>Trixie nodded as you sat down beside her on the bed
>"Yes, the Great and Powerful Trixie got the pizza," she said, leaning against you. "And Trixie would like to thank you for the food. Trixie was famished."
>You run your fingers through your thankfully now-clean wife's mane
>Trixie sighed, leaning against you just a hair more
>>26167728
"Good. Are you ready for bed?"
>Trixie nodded, and allowed you to pick her up and place her underneath the covers
>Shedding your clothing you crawled in after her, wrapping your arms around her barrel and pulling her close
>The two of you sighed as you buried your face into her mane and closed your eyes
>"...Anonymous?"
>You cracked open an eye
"Yeah Trixie?"
>"Trixie... I'm sorry that me and the girls told you off today."
>Chuckling, you kissed the top of your silly horse's head
"Water under the bridge, my little pony," you said. "But if it makes you feel any better dunking you in that water sure made up for your nonsense."
>You chuckled again, this time just a bit louder
"You're gonna get shit for that for as long as you live."
>Though she had her back to you you KNEW that she was frowning
>"...The Great and Powerful Trixie wishes to take back her apology."
>You kissed the back of her head again, closing your eyes
"I love you too, hon."
>Making a disgusted noise, Trixie turned off the lights with a spell and settled down for the night
>"Trixie loves you too, human. She doesn't like it but she loves you too."
>>26167757
Who was next?
>>26167757
Alright, one down. Done for the night
Oh, and fair warning, I started school today and as such my updates might just be a bit slower until I get my shit in order.
>>26167821
Loved it. Could you tone down the caps lock lines though?
>>26167821
absolutely lovely.
>>26167821
When's Axe Anon?
>>26167757
>"Trixie loves you too, human. She doesn't like it but she loves you too."
Poetic
>>26167821
Why are you so great?
Not been here long, but... An offering
>Be hungry Anon.
>It's like regular Anon, but with no food in the house.
>Having checked through every cupboard, found nothing more filling than a teabag, you decided you might have to switch schedule, and had headed to market a day early.
>Not a real problem for you, but you hadn't finished unloading the firewood from your cart, and so were stuck lugging everything by hand.
>BECAUSE REAL MEN DO IT IN ONE!
"Look AJ, I swear I'm fine. But can you just put the jam in the bag for me?"
>"No can do, pardner. I ain't never goin through a stallion's bag before, and I ain't gonna start now"
>Fucking appulhoers.
>"Anon, do you need a hoof with that~"
>Here we go again.
>Twiggles is here.
"Hello princess,"
>"Just Twilight, Anon, I told you~"
>Her horn lights up, sparks flickering up and down the overglow, and a similar light forms around the jar of apple jam.
>The market falls silent.
>Mares find their eyes drawn to Twilight, and her massive, throbbing spell structure.
>Stallions fall to the ground, dazzled by the maresculinity on show.
>That creepy DJ and Sweetie start bobbing their heads at each other, rubbing spiralled horn against spiralled horn.
>The jar lifts into the air, and drifts towards your open bag, settling nicely on top of a bundle of celery.
"Thanks, Twilight"
>At your words, the spell overloads, splashing sparks and drifting waves across the market.
>Rarity falls forward, tail-tip touching the back of her neck.
>Lyra seems to just relocate to the ground, but horizontal.
>Both with much less impressive waves of magic pouring from their horns.
>Twilight looks up at you,
>"Oh no, Anon,"
>The DJ rears up, and pounds her chest with her little hooves
>"It was..."
>The sun comes crashing down, and a massive eruption of mana from Canterlot takes its place in the sky.
>"My privilege"
>She finally collapses, more magic leaking out.
>You scratch your head, and go home, carefully stepping over the discharge.
>Fucking ponies, mang
>>26167757
>>26167821
Trixie a best.
>>26168365
hue
>>26167158
>>Reaching into his pocket Anon pulled out a little rubber dick and tossed it into the tub
>a little rubber dick
lmao dildos
>>26167821
That was absolutely adorable.
>>26167757
As always, enjoying your work LaP.
The only thing is that it can be hard to split up who is talking, because they're all nerdy unicorns (or princesses). But scriptstyle statements for that don't work.
>>26168365
have you ever oppressed a stallion so hard that two mares started jerking each other off and the sun exploded?
>>26168365
top kek
>>26168365
>ponies wonder why Anon doesn't have a purse like other stallions.
>they see the pockets on his pants and think that they're the human equivalent of a purse.
>>26167757
Personally this story isn't my cup of tea, skipping this one
