>Anon is banned from charging headlong into mirrors, trying to "Show Shim Sham [his] Ham"
>Anon is banned from showing his ham to anybody
>Anon is not allowed to vandalize museum exhibits because he believes them to be "not canon"
>Under no circumstances is anon allowed to have a pencil sharpener in the presence of unicorns
>>27745070
Fuck the police.
>>27745070
>Anon is not allowed to vandalize museum exhibits because he believes them to be "not canon"
You got a chuckle OP.
>>27745070
>Anon is not allowed to set princess celestia's mail on fire. despite his pleas, only spike the dragon's breath is capable of teleporting mail.
>When anon is instructed to "Go home" He is to return to his own domicile. he is not to go to the home of the mare who told him to leave, he did NOT misconstrue the order as an invitation to "hook up"
>Anon is not allowed to "Pet the Bologna Pony." He does not intend to show any form of affection to deli owners when he wishes to do this.
>Anon does not hold any rank in the Equestrian Military, and is not allowed to give himself titles indicating as such.
>Anon is prohibited to be in the presence of farm animals without supervision, no matter how much he pleas to cook "food from his homeland"
>Anon is not nor ever was a member of the "Navy Seals", has no sniper training and does not have over 300 confirmed kills.
Anon is not allowed to enter the Graphics Design workshop of the castle. Princesses Celestia is not to be compared to Canterlot Bananas, that is false advertizing.
Anon is not to publicly refer to Luna as the princess of bedwetters.
Anon is not allowed to draw Rarity a bath. Anon is not allowed to draw ponies having a bath, bathing, posting pictures of ponies having a bath in public areas and fountains, or to full her bathtub with mud or substances visually similar to mud and a covering layer of bubble bath suds.
Anon is not allowed to try to summon giant eagles to end disputes.
Anon is not allowed access to the public or private grounds sound system, no matter what groove, jam, or power of love he may be feeling.
>>27745176
>not to publically
So he can say it when not in public?
>Anon is to be kept at least 400 yards away from Zecora's home. Despite his frequent requests, Zecora refuses to:
>>Shrink his head
>>Grow his "Head"
>>Give him the power to lay waste to all he sees
Anon is not allowed to call Luna "mum" in public
Anon is not allowed to stir up outcry for Separatist voting elections because "Britain needs more Clone Wars."
Anon is not allowed to alter the plumbing in random houses for (bleeps) and giggles. Helium has proven too flammable.
Anon is not allowed to manage boxing matches, boxes of matches, or pie fights of any vernacular. Due to past transgressions, Anon is not allowed on the Pie Rock Farm. Additional reports will follow when the paternity test for Inky Pie and Blinky Pie becomes available.
>>27745070
List of good ones
>Under no circumstances is anon allowed to have a pencil sharpener in the presence of unicorns
>Anon is not allowed to vandalize museum exhibits because he believes them to be "not canon"
>Anon does not hold any rank in the Equestrian Military, and is not allowed to give himself titles indicating as such.
>Anon is prohibited to be in the presence of farm animals without supervision, no matter how much he pleas to cook "food from his homeland"
>Anon is not nor ever was a member of the "Navy Seals", has no sniper training and does not have over 300 confirmed kills.
>Anon is not to publicly refer to Luna as the princess of bedwetters.
>Anon is not allowed to try to summon giant eagles to end disputes.
These should be surprising things, not just stupid things. snarky, not pretending to be retarded.
Example of good ones
>Anon is not to great royalty or members of state service with "HOLY SHIT A TALKING HORSE"
>Even if it can be argued that their crimes are beyond such a thing, rape is never an appropriate punishment for criminal offenses.
shit ones are like this>>27745320
and the bath one in this one >>27745176
>>27745407
>For his own safety, Anon is not allowed to address Limestone Pie as "Blinky."
>>27745428
>TFW you're in both the good and shit categories
>>27745070
>Anon is no longer allowed to sing "the song of his people" at 3:00 am.
>Anon is no longer allowed to ask ponies if they want to see "his horn".
>Anon is no longer allowed to scream "THANKS M.A. LARSON" whenever princess Twilight enters the room.
>Anon is no longer allowed to call princess Luna "Moonbutt".
>>Not even if she asks for it.
>Anon is no longer allowed to tell new castle staff that he is: Captain of the royal guard, a gost, a bald bear, the dankest meme, underwear police, their spirit animal, a wizard, made of cookies, licenced to kill, princess flurry real father or a pussy eating god.
>Anon is no longer allowed to start any sentence with "Swiggity swooty".
>Anon is no longer allowed to replace Applejack's hat with a paper one.
>Anon is no longer allowed call anyone "normie", and he cannot tell them to "get off his board"
>Anon is no longer allowed to "praise the sun" by grabbing princess celestia ass.
>Anon is no longer allowed to be less than 1 km away from discord without proper supervision.
>>Princess luna doesn't count as proper supervision.
>>Pinkie pie is not proper supervision
>>Neither is shining armor.
>>Just don't let them get near.
>Anon is no longer allowed to join the cutie mark crusaders
>Anon is no longer allowed to tell princess twilight about "meme magic".
>Anon is no longer allowed to start a race war againist griffons.
>Anon is no longer allowed to "retake the holy lands".
>>27745070
>Anon is banned from making "knock knock" jokes.
>Anon is not allowed to go within five paces of the main plaza fountain.
>Anon is banned from asking anyone if they know what "spanking the monkey" means.
>No matter how often Anon claims it's human culture, smacking somepony's behind is not an acceptable way of greeting a friend.
>Anon will quit hiding pornographic magazines between the books in the castle library.
>"XXL Fat Mare Flanks" is NOT literature.
>>27745171
FUCK YOU NIGGER LIGHT THAT SHIT IS TRUE!!!
Didn't we have a list?
>>27746911
gotcha senpai
>>27745577
>"meme magic".
>dubs
like pottery
Gonna start cross-boarding here.
>Anon is banned from "going innawoods".
>Anon is banned from referring to any location as "a magical place", especially some where he calls "Kay".
>Anon is disallowed from possessing or storing any of the following items:
>"Bug-out bag"
>"Moist Nugget"
>"Em-are-eeys"
>"In case of skin walkers" is not a valid excuse for any of Anon's actions.
>Anon is not allowed to have any form of "destructive device" for recreational purposes
>Anon is not to scream SHALL NOT BE INFRINGED any time he sees a member of the police forces
>Self defence is not a reason to own a "Destructive device"
Anon is not allowed to install Frankenstien Bolts in medical patients.
Anon is not allowed to drop basses, bases, bass (fish), or asses.
Anon is not allowed to use arcane magic to speculate on futures (stock market), corner the market on green paint, corner the market on the production of green markers, construct Dead Space markers, or market himself as the future of law enforcement.
Anon is no longer allowed to collect or farm pegasusses (in whole or in part) so as to produce feather pillows.
Anon is not allowed to build towers taller than three stories.
Anon does not have the legal right to lay claim to the sky.
Anon is not allowed to try to build orbital elevators, surface-to-orbit staircases or slides, or orbital tethers.
Anon is banned from trying to tether objects such as plows and sailing ships, to the moon or sun. Or from selling functional or non-functional kits to allow others to try to do so.
>>27747550
>Anon's new invention of "geocaching" is now banned in Equestria for the following reasons:
>>All anon leaves in geocaches is his own feces.
>>Other citizens have also taken up this terrible hobby.
>Anon is not a big guy
Anon is not allowed to use the Double Dragon property, name, or setup, in whole or in part. (see attached document from the Embassy Of Dragonland) (document not attached)
>Anon is banned from asking every unicorn he encounters "Are you a wizard?" question repeatedly.
